Coaching Skills.pptx

7/28/2019 Coaching Skills.pptx

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Release

aspirations

Produce

extraordinary

resultsBuild Capacity

Amid change, complexity, competitionRobert Hargrove. Masterful Coaching Field book 2000


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Active Listening

Questioning Skills

Giving Feedback


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Active listening is listening andresponding that focuses the attention onthe speaker and improves mutual

understanding.


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is one of the most important skills of anemotionally intelligent leader

builds trust

encourages positive problem-solving

takes practice


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Desire to be

other-directed

No desire to

protect yourself

Desire to imaginethe experience of

the other

Desire tounderstand,

not critique

Qualities of Active Listeners


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We can do this by:

Quiet-ing our mind. Giving 100% of our

attention.

Being non-judgmental.

Paraphrasing-repeat what they have said inyour words to demonstrate that you haveunderstood the discussion and you have beenactively listening


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All the outward signs are there:

nodding, making eye contact, and giving theoccasional uh huh.

However, the faker isnt concentrating onthe speaker. His mind is elsewhere.

Lynn, Adele. B.. The Emotional Intelligence Activity Book p.69 2002 HRD Press


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Doesnt allow the speaker to finish

Doesnt ask clarifying questions or seekmore information from the speaker.

Too anxious to speak his words and showslittle concern for the speaker.



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Always trying to interpret what thespeaker is saying and why.

Judging the speakers words and trying tofit them into the logic box.

Rarely asks about the underlying feeling oremotion attached to a message.



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Uses the speakers words only as a way toget to his message.

Steals the focus and then changes to thisown point of view, opinion, story, or facts.

Favorite hooker lines are, Oh, thatsnothing, heres what happened to me Iremember when I was



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Listens long enough to form a rebuttal.

His point is to use the speakers wordsagainst him.

At his worst, he is argumentative andwants to prove you wrong.

At the very least, the person always wantsto make the speaker see the other point ofview.



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Giving advice is sometimes helpful; however, at othertimes, this behavior interferes with good listening,because it does not allow the speaker to fully articulatehis feelings or thoughts;

It doesnt help the speaker solve his own problems; itprohibits venting; it could also belittle the speaker byminimizing his or her concern with a quick solution.

Well-placed advice is an important function of leadership.

However, advice given too quickly and at the wrong timeis a turnoff to the speaker.



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Why does feedback go wrong?

Insensitive to power of feedback

Boss adopts directive/paternalisticapproach

Unbalanced; more attention paid tonegatives than positives


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Why does feedback go wrong?

Person doubts validity of instrumentand/or raters

Isolated from/poor relationship with Boss

Manner in which feedback is delivered &discussed


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Understand the emotionallandscape

Recognise that reflection about emotions as important tolearning as reflection on knowledge, skills, performance

Every one wants to know how they are doing,particularly in early career & how to do even better

The way in which feedback is given is crucial to this

process


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Handling Feedback

Encourage to reflect on their emotions onreceiving feedback, probe & challenge ifnecessary, before discussing content in detail.

Allow distress and dissatisfaction rather thanjumping in and rescuing

Encourageto reflect on the feedback, what they

got out of it and changes needed before offeringown views/suggestions


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Handling feedback

Positive & supportive approach

Refrain from sit and tell

Use your consultation skills e.g. use of silence;open questions; clarifying where needed;empathybut notcollusion

Describe behaviours/tasks notpersonality/attitudes


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Handling feedback

Steer staff towards what can be changed;what is achievable

Be specific

Own your views: use I


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Beware of blocking behaviour

Closed questions too soon

Making assumptions & allowing them toinfluence yourbehaviour

Leading questionsIgnoring cues

Rescuing

Jollying alongSwitching topic inappropriately


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FEEDBACK SKILLS

Encourage to identify specificoutcomes/goals to be achieved which arerealistic

Change is more likely if coachee hasgenerated it but do offer support and shareideas when appropriate


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How to give FEEDBACKS-B-I Model

Situation Describe where and when theobserved behavior occurred.

Behavior Describe what you saw or heard (avideotape would capture this nointerpretations or judgments).

Impact - Share the impact of the behavior on

you or others. I felt or I was. If you hearyourself saying YOU were youre probably onthe wrong track.


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Effective Feedback Strategies

Approaches to Feedback

Focus on the individuals behavior, not the

persons personality.Avoid globalizing behavior. (always,never)

Use I instead of you language.


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Using Feedback Effectively - Ask yourself:

Is this the right time?

Is this the right place?

Is this the appropriate person?What is the best way to communicate my message?

Is the feedback well thought out and valid?

What problems might feedback create?

Will my feedback damage the relationship? If yes,

how?


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Giving Negative Feedback (Criticism)

Tell the person exactly what you observed.

Explain exactly how you feel about the behavior and

the impact.

Solicit feedback.

Show support and solicit possible solutions from the

individual.Get a commitment to improve behavior.

Reaffirm the individuals worth.


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Receiving Negative Feedback

Listen, do not interrupt.

Ask for clarification or more information.Try to be objective. (Yes, it is hard!!!)

Decide if the comments are valid.

Now its your turn: Be polite and provideappropriate feedback. Say thank you.

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Coaching Skills.pptx