Concerning Christian Weddings

Cameron United Methodist Church

3130 Franconia Road, Alexandria, VA 22310703-960-9505

www.cameron-umc.org

Table of Contents

Introduction..........................................................................2

How to Plan Your Wedding.................................................3

Use of Facilities...................................................................5Reception

Coordination, Planning, and Services …………………… 6Wedding CoordinatorPlanningRehearsalSet-up and Restore ServicesMusic........................................................................7

Your Wedding Service.........................................................8Order of WorshipCreativityDecorations and Worship AidsCommunionWedding Bulletin

Photography and Recording...............................................10

Security Deposit, Fees, and Cancellations. .……………...11

Contacts and Forms............................................................12

Sample Order of Worship/Bulletin....................................13

Revised August 16, 2010

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Concerning Christian Weddings

CameronUnited Methodist

Church

We are glad you are seeking Cameron Church to participate in your wedding. There will be a number of people in the congregation who welcome the opportunity to work with you as you plan, prepare, and celebrate your holy union. We will listen and guide you through the process so that on your wedding day, you may celebrate a holy Christian marriage.

The Church provides a service of Christian marriage for couples who wish to share their marriage in a celebration of Christian worship. Christian marriage is proclaimed as a sacred covenant reflecting Christ's covenant with the church. The marriage covenant involves a total commitment of two persons to a life encompassing union, according to the gifts and purposes of God's creation. Therefore, the church encourages careful and prayerful consultation during the process of planning for a wedding ceremony.

Toward this end, this guide is designed to assist you. It will offer helpful suggestions, clarify the role of the church, and share with you the expectations of the church. Keep it handy and refer to it as you continue your planning process. If you have any questions concerning this guide or your wedding, please consult with the church office, Pastor or our wedding coordinator.

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How to Plan Your Wedding

Schedule: Be sure to consult with the Cameron UMC Pastor before announcing the date of your wedding. In view of the sacredness and importance of the event, he/she will schedule time to meet with the couple prior to the ceremony. It is important to set date, time, and place as more than one wedding may be scheduled for the same day. The administrative assistant in the church office will reserve the date for your wedding in consultation with the Pastor and receipt of your Information Sheet for Church Weddings and the security deposit.

Marriage License: In the Commonwealth of Virginia, a couple seeking marriage must obtain a marriage license, issued by the Clerk of the Circuit Court. The license is valid for 60 calendar days for marriages officiated in the state of Virginia. A valid marriage license must be presented to the Pastor before or at the rehearsal. Fairfax Circuit Court is located in the Fairfax County Judicial Center, Third Floor, Public Service Counter, 4110 Chain Bridge Rd., Fairfax. Alexandria Circuit Court is located in Room 307 at 520 King Street, Alexandria.

Clergy: It is assumed that the Pastor serving Cameron Church will conduct the (wedding) worship services held in the church. If you desire to have a pastor different than a pastor of Cameron Church participate in your wedding, it is proper that you first consult with a Cameron Church Pastor (always required). To invite other clergy to assist the Cameron clergy in conducting the ceremony is at the discretion of the Cameron Pastor.

Pastoral consultation: (Always required) The Pastor is pleased to assist you in arranging and planning your wedding. He will provide premarital counseling, guide you in designing your wedding ceremony, lead the rehearsal, and officiate at the wedding service.

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If you are not a member of Cameron, a consultation meeting is still required. The Pastor will review the Cameron Wedding Guide, fee schedule, and time line for requirements with you, as well as what you can expect and what is not permitted while using the Cameron Sanctuary. This meeting with the Cameron Pastor will include the prospective bride and groom, the officiating pastor, and the bride’s wedding planner if one is used.

Attendants: The people who will have a special role in your wedding should be chosen carefully to enhance the wedding ceremony. Ring bearers and flower girls should not be under five years of age. Attendants are expected to model worshipful attitude for all invited guests.

Time Line:

Schedule Wedding Date (confirm with the Pastor, complete the Information Sheet and the Facilities Use Agreement, and pay the Security Deposit. Fee Schedule will be provided at this time.)

Meet with the Cameron Pastor to review the Wedding Guide.............................................1½ - 12 months prior to wedding date

Announce your wedding date.....................at discretion of couple

Pre-marital counseling ……….allow 3-6 weeks (anytime afterscheduling but before the detail planning session)

Planning for non traditional or “custom personalized” weddingceremony…………………… 6- 8 weeks prior to wedding date

Contact Church Organist...................................................6 - 8 weeks prior to wedding date

Detail planning session for a traditional service (couple, Pastor and coordinator, all fees paid)....................................................2 -4 weeks prior to wedding date

Rehearsal (must present to the Pastor a valid Marriage License)..................................................usually night before wedding date

Security Deposit refund to couple as appropriate........................................usually mailed 1-3 weeks after wedding

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Use of Facilities

The facilities are entrusted to this congregation for worship and to provide ministry to the community. It is not “rented” to you. The church expects the property to be cared for and left in good condition following the ceremony. We recommend the use of birdseed or bubbles, rather than rice or confetti outside. Ladies usually use the Bride’s Room for changing. It is equipped for that purpose. Men usually arrive dressed and ready or use the choir room on the lower level. The use of other rooms should be reserved through the wedding coordinator.

Notice: All those using the facilities are asked to show respect for all the property. There will be no rearranging or removal of church fixtures or furnishings, or adjusting of any utilities or sound or lighting systems by anyone other than a church staff member. There will be no smoking in the building (including rest rooms) and no alcoholic beverages or illegal use of drugs on the premises (in the building or on the surrounding property). Food and beverages are not allowed in the Sanctuary or Chapel. The phone should be used only for an emergency.

Reception: A wedding reception may be held in the church fellowship

(Skelton) hall. The occupancy limit for fellowship hall is 185 people. The kitchen connected to the fellowship hall is also available. It is desirable to schedule such use of Church facilities early through the church office. Having the reception in the church involves an additional application and fee to the church for the use of the fellowship hall and kitchen, and is dependent upon the availability of at least one church staff Special Events Attendant. A fee is required for the attendant.

A copy of the Facilities Use Policy, Facilities Use Applicant Information and Liability Agreement, and Facility Use Fee Agreement may also be obtained from the church office.

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Coordination, Planning, and Services

Wedding Coordinator: (Required) Assists the Pastor in coordinating all rehearsals and weddings. The wedding coordinator works directly with the bride and groom in practical matters related to the ceremony and the church. A personal wedding planner is welcome but only to assist the Pastor and church wedding coordinator. The Cameron Wedding Coordinator does not act as an assistant to a personal wedding planner, and has final say in all matters. She attends the rehearsal and ceremony.

Planning: All arrangements, design, procedures, and order of worship for the wedding ceremony will be finalized, in consultation with the Pastor and the wedding coordinator, no later than two weeks prior to the wedding date. Minor changes can be made but are to be resolved at the rehearsal. Any decorations planned for the sanctuary for the wedding day must be reviewed and scheduled with the Wedding Coordinator.

Rehearsal: The Pastor is glad to give ample time for the rehearsal. All members of the wedding party should be at the rehearsal promptly at the time designated. Normally, the rehearsal should require not more than one hour. Those to attend the rehearsal are the bride and groom, ushers, groomsmen, bridal attendants, ring bearer, flower girl, and personal wedding planner (if used). Parents are welcome.

Set-up and Restore Services: (Required for weddings on church property) The Altar Guild prepares the Sanctuary, Narthex (entrance foyer), and Chancel area for the wedding ceremony by placing the kneeling bench, candelabra, carpet protectors, unity candle holders, and other items as pre-arranged. If communion is desired, the elements are prepared. The Altar Guild will assist the Pastor and wedding coordinator as necessary. After the wedding ceremony, the worship area is restored for the next scheduled service.

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Music

Music is very important to Cameron Church. Early in the planning for your wedding, you should make an appointment to meet with the Director of Music Ministries by telephoning the church office at 703-960-9505. You will need this consultation, even if you plan to use another organist or musicians in the wedding service. The Director of Music Ministries shall approve all vocal and instrumental music to be used; the involvement of someone else at the organ console is at the discretion of the church organist. If the church organist is not available for the service, a competent substitute will be provided.

Solo or ensemble music should be chosen so as to be appropriate for worship. The style may be traditional, popular, or country, but the content must contribute to the worship ceremony. You will want the music for your wedding service, as for any service of worship to God, to give glory to God and to reflect Christian beliefs. The organist is ready to accompany your soloist as you desire. Ensembles should be located in the choir loft. Solos may be presented from the choir loft or the pulpit. Any instrumental power requirements or amplification should be cleared with the Pastor and wedding coordinator no later than two weeks prior to the wedding date.

Keep two distinct categories of music in mind: (1) music for the wedding worship service, and (2) music for the wedding reception. Do not confuse the perfectly fine and proper music that you will want played at the reception (such as romantic favorites and show tunes), with the music you would choose for inclusion in the wedding worship service. The Director of Music Ministries will discuss many appropriate selections with you.

The organist will attend the wedding rehearsal, and any musician(s) providing processional and recessional music are expected to attend the rehearsal as well.

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Your Wedding Service

Order of Worship: The hymnal liturgy (order of worship) for A Service of Christian Marriage parallels in its structure the Sunday service, which includes the proclamation of the Word with prayer and praise. Both words and actions consistently reflect the belief that husband and wife are equal partners in Christian marriage and that they are choosing to enter into the marriage by their free will. The ceremony provides for both the bride’s family and groom’s family to affirm the marrying couple. Those present are understood to be part of an active congregation rather than simply a passive witness. They give their blessing to the couple and to the marriage, and they join in prayer and praise. The use of hymns is encouraged but not required.

Ask the Pastor if you are interested in looking at other orders of service for possibilities. The use or composition of alternative wording usually involves a study of wedding services by the couple, with additional consultations with the Pastor. If the ceremony is desired to be at a location other than in the church building, special arrangements must be made with the Pastor. Whenever the service is observed elsewhere, some thought and planning must be given to providing specific visible reminders for the congregation (invited guests) regarding the Christian context in which the wedding is being celebrated.

Creativity: The order of service is flexible enough to allow for options that can personalize this holy event. The use of any additions will be evaluated on the basis of whether they enhance the intended process of “making” a marriage covenant. Some options you may desire for your wedding ceremony may be one or more of the following: Holy Communion, vocal solos, church bulletins, unity candle, candelabra, or presentation of roses to the parents. Remember that all options need to be planned with the Pastor to preserve the worship context of the experience. More information concerning most of these options can be found elsewhere in this guide.

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Decorations and Worship Aids: The bride may choose her own florist for decorating the sanctuary appropriate to a worship setting. Often, paired arrangements are used on the flower shelves on either side of the altar or a single arrangement is used on the altar. The Chancel Bible may be placed on the altar, on a stand, or on the Baptismal Font. Floral delivery must be coordinated with the wedding coordinator. When arrangements have been made with the church office to leave the flowers for the Sunday service, acknowledgment will be made in the Sunday bulletin.

A kneeling bench is available for use as part of the ceremony.

Candles: (1) The altar candleholders use special candles and will be provided by the church. (2) A pair of candelabra is available. When used, the church will provide the 14 candles (see diagram at left). Any floral/greenery/bows attached to candelabra must be done with chenille pipe cleaners so that no damage will be done to the metal finish. (3) The church also has two styles of unity candleholders. One uses three standard candles, the other uses one pillar and two standard candles. You provide your own unity candles, which should be dripless if possible. If you will be using a unity candle, please bring it with you to the rehearsal. (4) There are also 12 votive candle globes, which can be scheduled for use in the windows.

All candelabra, unity candles, and potted plants must have plastic placed under them to protect the carpet. The paraments, worship aids, and Chancel furniture in the sanctuary should not be changed or moved without prior consultation with the Pastor. The use of thumb tacks, nails, and adhesive tapes are prohibited anywhere in the sanctuary. Although discouraged for safety reasons, the bride may choose to provide an aisle runner. The aisle (from doorway to the communion rail) is 62 feet. Real flower petals are not to be used on or near the carpeting since they have a tendency to stain the fabric; fabric petals may be used.

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Communion: The Sacrament of Holy Communion can add great Christian focus to the wedding ceremony. Holy Communion may or may not be celebrated. So that adequate preparation may be made, an estimate of the number of expected guests should be provided to the wedding coordinator.

Wedding Bulletin: Sometimes a church bulletin is desired for the wedding ceremony. Local Christian bookstores and printing companies offer a variety of church bulletins printed with colorful covers specifically for weddings. The church office can also order and prepare wedding bulletins. All bulletins should carry the phrases: “No flash photography permitted during the service” and “Please turn off or silence all cell phones and pagers.”

Photography and Recording

The following requirements are based on the policies of the Cameron Church Pastor. Should you be using your own pastor for the ceremony, please be sure to have your pastor advise the photographer and/or recording technician what he/she is allowed to do so that it does not distract from, or interfere with the ceremony.

Photographs: Well before the wedding date, the bride and groom are encouraged to share with the photographer lists of desired poses to minimize the amount of time needed for photography. Pictures may be taken before and after the ceremony.

The only pictures to be taken in the Sanctuary during the wedding ceremony (beginning with the first organ music) are to be by the designated photographer and are limited to the following:

1. Non-flash (timed) exposure(s) from the rear of the Sanctuary.

2. A picture of the bride and groom as they leave the Sanctuary.

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There should be no other flash during the ceremony, from the beginning when the music begins until the last member of the wedding party has exited the Sanctuary.

If close-ups at the altar are desired, the bridal party may return to the Sanctuary as soon as the guests have departed. Pictures may also be taken before the service with the understanding that the photographer is clear of the Sanctuary/Narthex area 30 minutes prior to the announced service time. Taking pictures in the Narthex blocks guests’ access to the Sanctuary and restrooms.

Invited guests may take pictures following the service with the designated photographer but should respect the designated photographer’s arrangements and efforts to expedite the taking of pictures.

Recording: Video taping of the ceremony is permitted if the videographer remains behind the congregation and/or the video recorder is mounted on a tripod and placed to the extreme side of the choir loft. Any placement of microphones or cords must be coordinated with the Pastor.

Security Deposit, Fees, and Cancellation The security deposit is required to (1) reserve the date of your wedding (2) to cover any damage or abuse to the facility as a result of the event and (3) to cover costs for excessive time over the allotted time for the rehearsal, preparation, service and pictures due to the wedding party, and (4) last minute changes. Excessive time and changes will be billed separately via letter after the ceremony, if more than the security deposit will cover. All or remaining security deposit will be refunded to you approximately one to three weeks after your wedding. It will not be used to offset your agreed-to fees.

Amounts listed on the fee schedule and worksheet for building use and personnel are based on no more than 1-1/2 hours for rehearsal, 2-1/2 hours preparation on the wedding day, and 1-1/2 hours for service and pictures. Each amount is to be increased by $50.00 for each hour or portion of hour per church staff member present over

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the allowed time. Reception fees will be based on the Facilities Use Agreement.

All fees shall be made payable by check or money order to Cameron United Methodist Church with your names on the memo line (i.e. Smith/Jones Wedding). Initial, agreed-to fees, must be delivered to the church office during office hours, no later than two weeks before the wedding.

A cancellation fee will consist of any fees incurred at the time of cancellation.

Contacts and Forms

Contacts

Pastor:.................................................David L. Nesselrodt, 703-960-9505Director of Music Ministries: ……… Mrs. Carol Schaub, 703-569-2099Wedding Coordinator: .......................Ms. Julie Bowersett 703-971-9009

FormsSeparate forms to be completed:

Information Sheet for Church Weddings Facilities Use Agreement for Weddings Wedding Fee Agreement

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Sample Order of Worship/ Bulletin

The Gathering and Declaration of Intentions

Prelude ♫Processional ♫GreetingDeclaration of Intention by the CoupleResponse of the Families and PeoplePrayer

Proclamation and Response

Scripture ♫SermonPrayer

The Marriage Covenant

The Exchange of VowsThe Blessing and Exchange of RingsThe Declaration of MarriageThe Unity Candle ♫ (if used)The Blessing of the MarriageThe Lord’s Prayer

Sending ForthDismissalRecessional ♫Postlude ♫

(♫ possible location for appropriate solos)

NOTES

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