Building Partnerships that Work:

A Crash Course in Rapport-Building

Lisa Olcese, Executive Director – Colorado Youth Matter

lolcese@coloradoyouthmatter.org 1

Welcome!

What does RAPPORT look/sound/feel like?Intentions and OutcomesAgenda– Basic Toolkit– Senses and How we Understand– Thought Experiments– Matching What We Say, See, Hear– Eye Cues– Q&A

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Agenda* Basic Toolkit* Senses and How we Understand* Thought Experiments* Matching What We Say, See,

Hear* Eye Cues* Q&A

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The Basic ToolkitSENSORY AWARENESS

1.Match what we say, how we look & sound.2. We don’t see things as they are; we see them as we are. Anaïs

Nin

BEHAVIORAL FLEXIBILITY1.Be curious.2.If what you’re doing isn’t working, do something else!

OUTCOME THINKING1. Know what you want.2. When we know where we want to go, we know if we get there

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We Live in the World of Our Senses

VisualAuditoryKinesthetic/TouchGustatory/TasteOlfactory/Smell

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Understanding How We Understand

Our senses are our‘modes of perception,’

and we have preferences…

Visual - making imagesAuditory - self-talk

Kinesthetic - having feelings

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Thought Experiments

Critical inner voice

Someone you like vs. dislike

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VISUAL AUDITORY KINESTHETIC

Match What We Say: Words that Reveal Preferred “Modes of Perception”

Looks like __________ __________ __________ __________

Sounds like __________ __________ __________ __________

Feels like __________ __________ __________ __________

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Verbal Rapport: PRACTICEI can’t see the point of that rule.

Other kids are saying that it’s all right.

I need to get a feel for this plan but I’m not there yet.

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Match What We See & HearHOW WE SOUNDHOW WE LOOK

Gestures __________ __________ __________ __________

Pitch, volume __________ __________ __________ __________

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The Eyes Have ItVisual Constructed

Visual Remembered

Auditory Constructed

Auditory Remembered

Kinesthetic – sensations, feelings

Self-Talk

Thank You!www.coloradoyouthmatter.org

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Questions & Comments

How/when will you use today’s tools?1. 2.3.