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A Weekly Column By Walter B. Hoye II
Conflict Of
Interest
In the abortion debate, is there a "Conflict of Interest"within
the Black community and among her leaders?
Subscribe Unsubscribe Forward Archives Issue No.: 2011.255
Betrayal Trauma
"I propose that the core issue is betrayal -- a betrayal of
trust that produces conflict between external reality and a
necessary system of social dependence." Jennifer J. Freyd
Betrayal Trauma is a theory that tries to predict the
degree to which a negative event, perpetrated by a
trusted and needed other, will influence the way
events (past, present and future) are both
processed and remembered and occurs when the
people or institutions we depend on for survivalviolate us in
some way. 1 Dr. Jennifer J. Freyd, a Professor of Psychology at
the University of Oregon, is the author of the terms "Betrayal
Trauma" and
"Betrayal Trauma Theory." Below Freyd argues that under some
circumstances detecting betrayals may be counter-productive to
survival.
The psychic pain involved in detecting betrayal, as in detecting
a
cheater, is an evolved, adaptive, motivator for changing
social
alliances. In general it is not to our survival or
reproductive
advantage to go back for further interaction to those who
havebetrayed us. However, if the person who has betrayed us is
someone we need to continue interacting with despite the
betrayal, then it is not to our advantage to respond to the
betrayal in
the normal way. Instead we essentially need to ignore the
betrayal. 2
This is part two (2) of a seven (7) part series examining why
Black Leadership
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rejects the Pro-Life movement, is helping to perpetrate the
genocide of their own
people and what can be done to reverse this horrific
reality.
Betrayal Trauma: Self Inflicted
Self-Betrayal \self-bi-'tr!(-")l\ is "The intentional or
inadvertent revelation of the truth about one's actions or
thoughts." The Oxford Pocket Dictionary3
The Number One Reason Black leadership rejects
the Pro-Life movement is that he or she is: Post-Abortive. In
other words, there is an abortion in his
or her life somewhere. It may be their father,
mother, sister or brother. It may be their wife, son or
daughter. It may be a member of their own
congregation whom they have counseled to get an
abortion. A worst case scenario might look like a
leader who is married and the abortion in his or her
life is the result of an immoral relationship.
Furthermore, because the impact of abortion on the
life of the leader is mitigated by the role (or the lack
thereof) he or she played in the decision, how each leader
responds to their
own environment is unique. Here is where "Betrayal Trauma
Theory," is
helpful. If the pain involved in detecting betrayal, motivates
us to
"change social alliances," it is not surprising to see leaders,
many of whom
are suffering from the effects of a past abortion, leave clearly
biblical
constructs and conclaves to embrace abortion industry policies,
practices and
politics. As we dig deeper into the trauma of betrayal and learn
that the person
who betrayed the leader is someone he or she needs to continue
interacting
with "despite the betrayal" (i.e., him or herself) then and only
if we are willingto be transparently honest with ourselves, is it
easy to understand why
leaders would rather live with themselves by ignoring the
betrayal, than
risk the ruin that can result from privately and publicly
confessing and
confronting the betrayal. The truth is we are no different than
our leaders. All
of us have fallen short of the glory of God (Romans 3:23).
Betrayal Trauma: A Matter Of The Heart
"And Peter remembered the word of Jesus, which said unto him,
Before the cock crow, thou shalt deny me thrice. And he
went out, and wept bitterly." Matthew 26:75 (KJV)
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While any recommendation, made in good faith,
should recognize the different circumstances facing
different leaders at any given point in time, there is a
common characteristic shared by Post-Abortive
leaders. Like many of us, Post-Abortive leaders
tend to see the world in a way that justifies their
decisions and as a result their view of reality
becomes distorted. This is one reason why facts
and figures, logic and reason will always fail to
reach the heart of the matter. This should not be hard to
understand. Post-
Abortive leaders are people who are hurt and hurt people, hurt
people.
Because abortion is clearly a matter of the heart, we must
understand that
only the love of Christ can heal a heart. If the Apostle Peter
is an example of a
leader who acted contrary to his core values, then even though
our leaders
are smiling on the outside, many of them are swallowing a toxic
sense of
"self-betrayal" (i.e., the intentional or inadvertent revelation
of the truth about
one's actions or thoughts.4) on the inside, with nobody to blame
but
themselves.
Brothers, just as Jesus forgave Peter and met him in Galilee
(Mark 16:7), we
can be confident that He will forgive us, despite the betrayal
and meet us
right where we are.
Brothers, we really need to talk.
Reference(s):
1. Freyd, J.J. Memory repression, dissociative states, and other
cognitive control processes involved in adult sequelae of
childhood trauma. Invited paper given at the Second Annual
Conference on A Psychodynamics - Cognitive Science
Interface, Langley Porter Psychiatric Institute, University of
California, San Francisco, August 21-22, 1991.
2. Freyd, J.J. (2009). What is a Betrayal Trauma? What is
Betrayal Trauma Theory? Retrieved Friday, August 26th, 2011
from: http://bit.ly/q0Uuop.
3. "Self-Betrayal." The Oxford Pocket Dictionary of Current
English. 2009. Retrieved Friday, August 26, 2011 from
Encyclopedia.Com: http://bit.ly/rhbdqt
4. Ibid.
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