7/31/2019 Becoming a Loving Person [DISCIPLESHIP]

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SKI Youth Valentines Fellowship

Feb. 11, 2007 (Sunday), 2pm

Topic: BECOMING A LOVING PERSONKey Text: I Corinthians 13

I INTRODUCTION

I Cor. 13 ends with these familiar words, And now these three remain: faith, hopeand love. But the greatest of these is love. Love is also the first fruit of the HS mentioned

in Galatians 5. But what is love?Love is probably the most misunderstood word in the world. In fact, we use this

word to describe a lot of things, we even overuse it in so many different ways that it has,literally lost is real meaning.For example: I love my wife. I love America, I love pizza, I

love eating, dog food?, etc, etc.

Its difficult to give or receive love when you dont even understand what it is.

There are two popular misconceptions: (1) Most people think that love is afeeling. Its anocean of emotion. How often do we rely on our feelings, and let them motivate us to do all

kinds of things. True enough, love does produce feelings, but it is more than a feeling. And(2) Most people think that love is uncontrollable, like this familiar phrase: I fell in love

as if you have tripped? And we assume that love cant be controlled.But the bible says it is

controllable! Jesus commanded us to love others, which means that we do have controlover whom we love and whom we dont love.

Actually, love is a matter of 2 things:(1) Love is a matter of choice. The bible

says. Over all these virtues, put on love which binds them all together in perfect unity

(Col. 3:14). Notice the words put on. Love is something we can choose to have. Love isa choice. And (2) Love is a matter of conduct. Its something we do. It is an action, not a

feeling. I John 3:18 commands: Let us not love with words or tongue, but with actionsand in truth. The sad thing is, we often love with words or tongue but not with actions.The Greeks has 4 words to differentiate different kinds of love: (1) Storge,

which means natural affection, (2) Eros, which means sexual attraction, (3) Philia, which

means emotional affection or friendship, and (4) Agape, which means unconditional,giving, selfless, sacrificial love. When the bible speaks of Gods love for us and the kind of

love were to have for him and for others, the word is always Agape.

II MESSAGE

Do you know that its possible to love someone you dont even like? Especially

those people you have trouble getting along with? Jesus never demanded that we have awarm affection for everyone. We dont have to like everyone, but we have to love them.

Well, how do we do that? There are 5 steps that we need to take to learn to love people:

1) EXPERIENCE GODS LOVE

Before we can love others, we must feel and understand first how Goddeeply loves us (Eph. 3:17-18). God wants us to experience and understand

His love. Why? It is that we love because He love first loved us! Why is it soimportant to feel loved by God? Because unloved people are often unloving

people. When I dont feel being loved, I dont feel like giving love. Jesus said,

Love each other as I have loved you (John 15:12). Thats the model.

2) FORGIVE YOUR ENEMIES

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The second step in learning to love others is forgiving those who havehurt us (Col.3:13). The truth is that, we cannot give total love when our heart

is divided. And bitter heart is a divided heart. We have to let go of the past toget on with the present. In order to begin loving people today, we must close the

door on the past. And there is only one way to do it forgiveness! Forgive

those who have hurt you, for your sake, not because they deserve it. Instead ofrehearsing that hurt over and over, release it. Do it so your heart can be whole

again.

3) THINK LOVING THOUGHTS

The third step is to think loving thoughts.Phil. 2:4-5 reminds us to care

for the interest of others in humble attitude like that of Christ. What does it

mean to think loving thoughts? It means to we begin to focus on others peoplesneeds, hurts, problems, desires and goals, not just on your own. Heres a factof life: Hurt people hurt others. If someone is hurting you, hes acting this

way because he is hurting. Havent you found it to be true that the most

obnoxious people and the least lovable person are those who need love themost? When we change the way we think about someone, we will gradually

change our feelings about him.

4) ACT IN LOVE

The fourth step is act in a loving way. The so-called loving by faith thosewe dont like. When you love by faith, you act yourself into a feeling. If I act as

if I am enthusiastic, Ill soon begin to feel enthusiastic. If I act as if I am happy,

before you know it Ill feel happy. If we begin to act lovingly, well soon feel

loving. Now, how do we act in a loving way? Jesus gives us His command in

Luke 6:27-28: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those

who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you. So, love is an action.

RememberI Cor. 13:4-8, love is patient, love is kind, etc

5) EXPECT THE BEST

The last step may, in some ways, be the most difficult: Expect the best of

them (I Cor.13:7). Love expects the best. Have you noticed that we tend to live

up to what people expect of us? When we expect the best, we bring out the best.

This is loving by faith. Love is contagious, and it changes people. How then do

we change a person for the best? Treat them the way you want them to become!

III CONCLUSION

In summary, in order for you to become a loving person, having that kind of Agape

love, first you must understand that God loves you and you must experience it in your

heart. Then youforgive those who have hurt you in the past in order free yourself of thepast so you can love today. Then you start thinking loving thoughts and acting in loving

ways, and the feelings starts coming. And finally, you can learn to expect the best fromothers by the way you lovingly treat them.