Alice 30

Embed Size (px)

Citation preview

  • 8/4/2019 Alice 30

    1/65

    ***ThisistheProjectGutenbergEtextofAliceinWonderland****This30theditionshouldbelabeledalice30.txtoralice30.zip.***ThisEditionIsBeingOfficiallyReleasedOnMarch8,1994*****InCelebrationOfThe23rdAnniversaryofProjectGutenberg***

    Pleasetakealookattheimportantinformationinthisheader.Weencourageyoutokeepthisfileonyourowndisk,keepinganelectronicpathopenforthenextreaders.Donotremovethis.

    **WelcomeToTheWorldofFreePlainVanillaElectronicTexts**

    **EtextsReadableByBothHumansandByComputers,Since1971**

    *TheseEtextsPreparedByHundredsofVolunteersandDonations*

    InformationoncontactingProjectGutenbergtogetEtexts,andfurtherinformationisincludedbelow.Weneedyourdonations.

    Alice'sAdventuresinWonderland

    March,1994[Etext#11]

    [OriginallyreleasedinJanuary,1991][Datelastupdated:January10,2004]

    *****TheProjectGutenbergEtextofAliceInWonderland***********Thisfileshouldbenamedalice30.txtoralice30.zip******

    CorrectedEDITIONSofouretextsgetanewNUMBER,alice31.txtVERSIONSbasedonseparatesourcesgetnewLETTER,alice30a.txt

    Wearenowtryingtoreleaseallourbooksonemonthinadvanceoftheofficialreleasedates,fortimeforbetterediting.We

    havethisasagoaltoaccomplishbytheendoftheyearbutwecannotguaranteetostaythatfaraheadeverymonthafterthat.

    Pleasenote:neitherthislistnoritscontentsarefinaltillmidnightofthelastdayofthemonthofanysuchannouncement.TheofficialreleasedateofallProjectGutenbergEtextsisatMidnight,CentralTime,ofthelastdayofthestatedmonth.Apreliminaryversionmayoftenbepostedforsuggestion,commentandeditingbythosewhowishtodoso.Tobesureyouhaveanuptodatefirstedition[xxxxx10x.xxx]pleasecheckfilesizesinthefirstweekofthenextmonth.Sinceourftpprogramhasabuginitthatscramblesthedate[triedtofixandfailed]alookatthefilesizewillhavetodo,butwewilltrytoseea

    newcopyhasatleastonebytemoreorless.

    InformationaboutProjectGutenberg(onepage)

    Weproduceabouttwomilliondollarsforeachhourwework.Thefiftyhoursisoneconservativeestimateforhowlongitwetaketogetanyetextselected,entered,proofread,edited,copyrightsearchedandanalyzed,thecopyrightletterswritten,etc.Thisprojectedaudienceisonehundredmillionreaders.Ifourvalue

  • 8/4/2019 Alice 30

    2/65

    pertextisnominallyestimatedatonedollarthenweproduce$4milliondollarsperhourthisyearaswereleasesomeeighttextfilespermonth:thusuppingourproductivityfrom$2million.

    TheGoalofProjectGutenbergistoGiveAwayOneTrillionEtextFilesbytheDecember31,2001.[10,000x100,000,000=Trillion]Thisistenthousandtitleseachtoonehundredmillionreaders,whichis10%oftheexpectednumberofcomputerusersbytheendoftheyear2001.

    Weneedyourdonationsmorethanever!

    Alldonationsshouldbemadeto"ProjectGutenberg/IBC",andaretaxdeductibletotheextentallowablebylaw("IBC"isIllinoisBenedictineCollege).(SubscriptionstoourpapernewslettergotoIBC,too)

    Fortheseandothermatters,pleasemailto:

    ProjectGutenbergP.O.Box2782Champaign,IL61825

    WhenallotheremailfailstryourMichaelS.Hart,Executive

    Director:[email protected](internet)hart@uiucvmd(bitnet)

    Wewouldprefertosendyouthisinformationbyemail(Internet,Bitnet,Compuserve,ATTMAILorMCImail).

    ******IfyouhaveanFTPprogram(oremulator),pleaseFTPdirectlytotheProjectGutenbergarchives:[Macusers,doNOTpointandclick...type]

    ftpmrcnext.cso.uiuc.edulogin:anonymous

    password:your@logincdetext/etext91orcdetext92orcdetext93[fornewbooks][nowalsoincdetext/etext93]orcdetext/articles[getsuggestgutformoreinformation]dir[toseefiles]getormget[togetfiles...setbinforzipfiles]GET0INDEX.GUTforalistofbooksandGETNEWGUTforgeneralinformationandMGETGUT*fornewsletters.

    **InformationpreparedbytheProjectGutenberglegaladvisor**(ThreePages)

    ***START**THESMALLPRINT!**FORPUBLICDOMAINETEXTS**START***Whyisthis"SmallPrint!"statementhere?Youknow:lawyers.Theytellusyoumightsueusifthereissomethingwrongwithyourcopyofthisetext,evenifyougotitforfreefromsomeoneotherthanus,andevenifwhat'swrongisnotour

  • 8/4/2019 Alice 30

    3/65

    fault.So,amongotherthings,this"SmallPrint!"statementdisclaimsmostofourliabilitytoyou.Italsotellsyouhowyoucandistributecopiesofthisetextifyouwantto.

    *BEFORE!*YOUUSEORREADTHISETEXTByusingorreadinganypartofthisPROJECTGUTENBERG-tmetext,youindicatethatyouunderstand,agreetoandacceptthis"SmallPrint!"statement.Ifyoudonot,youcanreceivearefundofthemoney(ifany)youpaidforthisetextbysendingarequestwithin30daysofreceivingittothepersonyougotitfrom.Ifyoureceivedthisetextonaphysicalmedium(suchasadisk),youmustreturnitwithyourrequest.

    ABOUTPROJECTGUTENBERG-TMETEXTSThisPROJECTGUTENBERG-tmetext,likemostPROJECTGUTENBERG-tmetexts,isa"publicdomain"workdistributedbyProfessorMichaelS.HartthroughtheProjectGutenbergAssociationatIllinoisBenedictineCollege(the"Project").Amongotherthings,thismeansthatnooneownsaUnitedStatescopyrightonorforthiswork,sotheProject(andyou!)cancopyanddistributeitintheUnitedStateswithoutpermissionandwithoutpayingcopyrightroyalties.Specialrules,setforthbelow,applyifyouwishtocopyanddistributethisetextundertheProject's"PROJECTGUTENBERG"trademark.

    Tocreatetheseetexts,theProjectexpendsconsiderableeffortstoidentify,transcribeandproofreadpublicdomainworks.Despitetheseefforts,theProject'setextsandanymediumtheymaybeonmaycontain"Defects".Amongotherthings,Defectsmaytaketheformofincomplete,inaccurateorcorruptdata,transcriptionerrors,acopyrightorotherintellectualpropertyinfringement,adefectiveordamageddiskorotheretextmedium,acomputervirus,orcomputercodesthatdamageorcannotbereadbyyourequipment.

    LIMITEDWARRANTY;DISCLAIMEROFDAMAGESButforthe"RightofReplacementorRefund"describedbelow,

    [1]theProject(andanyotherpartyyoumayreceivethisetextfromasaPROJECTGUTENBERG-tmetext)disclaimsallliabilitytoyoufordamages,costsandexpenses,includinglegalfees,and[2]YOUHAVENOREMEDIESFORNEGLIGENCEORUNDERSTRICTLIABILITY,ORFORBREACHOFWARRANTYORCONTRACT,INCLUDINGBUTNOTLIMITEDTOINDIRECT,CONSEQUENTIAL,PUNITIVEORINCIDENTALDAMAGES,EVENIFYOUGIVENOTICEOFTHEPOSSIBILITYOFSUCHDAMAGES.

    IfyoudiscoveraDefectinthisetextwithin90daysofreceivingit,youcanreceivearefundofthemoney(ifany)youpaidforitbysendinganexplanatorynotewithinthattimetothepersonyoureceiveditfrom.Ifyoureceivedit

    onaphysicalmedium,youmustreturnitwithyournote,andsuchpersonmaychoosetoalternativelygiveyouareplacementcopy.Ifyoureceiveditelectronically,suchpersonmaychoosetoalternativelygiveyouasecondopportunitytoreceiveitelectronically.

    THISETEXTISOTHERWISEPROVIDEDTOYOU"AS-IS".NOOTHERWARRANTIESOFANYKIND,EXPRESSORIMPLIED,AREMADETOYOUASTOTHEETEXTORANYMEDIUMITMAYBEON,INCLUDINGBUTNOTLIMITEDTOWARRANTIESOFMERCHANTABILITYORFITNESSFORA

  • 8/4/2019 Alice 30

    4/65

    PARTICULARPURPOSE.

    Somestatesdonotallowdisclaimersofimpliedwarrantiesortheexclusionorlimitationofconsequentialdamages,sotheabovedisclaimersandexclusionsmaynotapplytoyou,andyoumayhaveotherlegalrights.

    INDEMNITYYouwillindemnifyandholdtheProject,itsdirectors,officers,membersandagentsharmlessfromallliability,costandexpense,includinglegalfees,thatarisedirectlyorindirectlyfromanyofthefollowingthatyoudoorcause:[1]distributionofthisetext,[2]alteration,modification,oradditiontotheetext,or[3]anyDefect.

    DISTRIBUTIONUNDER"PROJECTGUTENBERG-tm"Youmaydistributecopiesofthisetextelectronically,orbydisk,bookoranyothermediumifyoueitherdeletethis"SmallPrint!"andallotherreferencestoProjectGutenberg,or:

    [1]Onlygiveexactcopiesofit.Amongotherthings,thisrequiresthatyoudonotremove,alterormodifytheetextorthis"smallprint!"statement.Youmayhowever,

    ifyouwish,distributethisetextinmachinereadablebinary,compressed,mark-up,orproprietaryform,includinganyformresultingfromconversionbywordpro-cessingorhypertextsoftware,butonlysolongas*EITHER*:

    [*]Theetext,whendisplayed,isclearlyreadable,anddoes*not*containcharactersotherthanthoseintendedbytheauthorofthework,althoughtilde(~),asterisk(*)andunderline(_)charactersmaybeusedtoconveypunctuationintendedbytheauthor,andadditionalcharactersmaybeusedtoindicatehypertextlinks;OR

    [*]TheetextmaybereadilyconvertedbythereaderatnoexpenseintoplainASCII,EBCDICorequivalentformbytheprogramthatdisplaystheetext(asisthecase,forinstance,withmostwordprocessors);OR

    [*]Youprovide,oragreetoalsoprovideonrequestatnoadditionalcost,feeorexpense,acopyoftheetextinitsoriginalplainASCIIform(orinEBCDICorotherequivalentproprietaryform).

    [2]Honortheetextrefundandreplacementprovisionsofthis

    "SmallPrint!"statement.

    [3]PayatrademarklicensefeetotheProjectof20%ofthenetprofitsyouderivecalculatedusingthemethodyoualreadyusetocalculateyourapplicabletaxes.Ifyoudon'tderiveprofits,noroyaltyisdue.Royaltiesarepayableto"ProjectGutenbergAssociation/IllinoisBenedictineCollege"withinthe60daysfollowingeachdateyouprepare(orwerelegallyrequiredtoprepare)yourannual(orequivalentperiodic)taxreturn.

  • 8/4/2019 Alice 30

    5/65

    WHATIFYOU*WANT*TOSENDMONEYEVENIFYOUDON'THAVETO?TheProjectgratefullyacceptscontributionsinmoney,time,scanningmachines,OCRsoftware,publicdomainetexts,royaltyfreecopyrightlicenses,andeveryothersortofcontributionyoucanthinkof.Moneyshouldbepaidto"ProjectGutenbergAssociation/IllinoisBenedictineCollege".

    This"SmallPrint!"byCharlesB.Kramer,AttorneyInternet([email protected]);TEL:(212-254-5093)*END*THESMALLPRINT!FORPUBLICDOMAINETEXTS*Ver.04.29.93*END*

    ALICE'SADVENTURESINWONDERLAND

    LewisCarroll

    THEMILLENNIUMFULCRUMEDITION3.0

    CHAPTERI

    DowntheRabbit-Hole

    Alicewasbeginningtogetverytiredofsittingbyhersisteronthebank,andofhavingnothingtodo:onceortwiceshehadpeepedintothebookhersisterwasreading,butithadnopicturesorconversationsinit,`andwhatistheuseofabook,'thoughtAlice`withoutpicturesorconversation?'

    Soshewasconsideringinherownmind(aswellasshecould,forthehotdaymadeherfeelverysleepyandstupid),whether

    thepleasureofmakingadaisy-chainwouldbeworththetroubleofgettingupandpickingthedaisies,whensuddenlyaWhiteRabbitwithpinkeyesranclosebyher.

    TherewasnothingsoVERYremarkableinthat;nordidAlicethinkitsoVERYmuchoutofthewaytoheartheRabbitsaytoitself,`Ohdear!Ohdear!Ishallbelate!'(whenshethoughtitoverafterwards,itoccurredtoherthatsheoughttohavewonderedatthis,butatthetimeitallseemedquitenatural);butwhentheRabbitactuallyTOOKAWATCHOUTOFITSWAISTCOAT-POCKET,andlookedatit,andthenhurriedon,Alicestartedtoherfeet,foritflashedacrosshermindthatshehadneverbeforeseenarabbitwitheitherawaistcoat-pocket,orawatchto

    takeoutofit,andburningwithcuriosity,sheranacrossthefieldafterit,andfortunatelywasjustintimetoseeitpopdownalargerabbit-holeunderthehedge.

    InanothermomentdownwentAliceafterit,neveronceconsideringhowintheworldshewastogetoutagain.

    Therabbit-holewentstraightonlikeatunnelforsomeway,andthendippedsuddenlydown,sosuddenlythatAlicehadnotamomenttothinkaboutstoppingherselfbeforeshefoundherself

  • 8/4/2019 Alice 30

    6/65

    fallingdownaverydeepwell.

    Eitherthewellwasverydeep,orshefellveryslowly,forshehadplentyoftimeasshewentdowntolookaboutherandtowonderwhatwasgoingtohappennext.First,shetriedtolookdownandmakeoutwhatshewascomingto,butitwastoodarktoseeanything;thenshelookedatthesidesofthewell,andnoticedthattheywerefilledwithcupboardsandbook-shelves;hereandthereshesawmapsandpictureshunguponpegs.Shetookdownajarfromoneoftheshelvesasshepassed;itwaslabelled`ORANGEMARMALADE',buttohergreatdisappointmentitwasempty:shedidnotliketodropthejarforfearofkillingsomebody,somanagedtoputitintooneofthecupboardsasshefellpastit.

    `Well!'thoughtAlicetoherself,`aftersuchafallasthis,Ishallthinknothingoftumblingdownstairs!Howbravethey'llallthinkmeathome!Why,Iwouldn'tsayanythingaboutit,evenifIfelloffthetopofthehouse!'(Whichwasverylikelytrue.)

    Down,down,down.WouldthefallNEVERcometoanend!`IwonderhowmanymilesI'vefallenbythistime?'shesaidaloud.`Imustbegettingsomewherenearthecentreoftheearth.Let

    mesee:thatwouldbefourthousandmilesdown,Ithink--'(for,yousee,Alicehadlearntseveralthingsofthissortinherlessonsintheschoolroom,andthoughthiswasnotaVERYgoodopportunityforshowingoffherknowledge,astherewasnoonetolistentoher,stillitwasgoodpracticetosayitover)`--yes,that'sabouttherightdistance--butthenIwonderwhatLatitudeorLongitudeI'vegotto?'(AlicehadnoideawhatLatitudewas,orLongitudeeither,butthoughttheywerenicegrandwordstosay.)

    Presentlyshebeganagain.`IwonderifIshallfallrightTHROUGHtheearth!Howfunnyit'llseemtocomeoutamongthepeoplethatwalkwiththeirheadsdownward!TheAntipathies,I

    think--'(shewasrathergladthereWASnoonelistening,thistime,asitdidn'tsoundatalltherightword)`--butIshallhavetoaskthemwhatthenameofthecountryis,youknow.Please,Ma'am,isthisNewZealandorAustralia?'(andshetriedtocurtseyasshespoke--fancyCURTSEYINGasyou'refallingthroughtheair!Doyouthinkyoucouldmanageit?)`Andwhatanignorantlittlegirlshe'llthinkmeforasking!No,it'llneverdotoask:perhapsIshallseeitwrittenupsomewhere.'

    Down,down,down.Therewasnothingelsetodo,soAlicesoonbegantalkingagain.`Dinah'llmissmeverymuchto-night,Ishouldthink!'(Dinahwasthecat.)`Ihopethey'llrememberhersaucerofmilkattea-time.Dinahmydear!Iwishyouwere

    downherewithme!Therearenomiceintheair,I'mafraid,butyoumightcatchabat,andthat'sverylikeamouse,youknow.Butdocatseatbats,Iwonder?'AndhereAlicebegantogetrathersleepy,andwentonsayingtoherself,inadreamysortofway,`Docatseatbats?Docatseatbats?'andsometimes,`Dobatseatcats?'for,yousee,asshecouldn'tanswereitherquestion,itdidn'tmuchmatterwhichwaysheputit.Shefeltthatshewasdozingoff,andhadjustbeguntodreamthatshewaswalkinghandinhandwithDinah,andsayingtoherveryearnestly,`Now,Dinah,tellmethetruth:didyouevereata

  • 8/4/2019 Alice 30

    7/65

    bat?'whensuddenly,thump!thump!downshecameuponaheapofsticksanddryleaves,andthefallwasover.

    Alicewasnotabithurt,andshejumpedupontoherfeetinamoment:shelookedup,butitwasalldarkoverhead;beforeherwasanotherlongpassage,andtheWhiteRabbitwasstillinsight,hurryingdownit.Therewasnotamomenttobelost:awaywentAlicelikethewind,andwasjustintimetohearitsay,asitturnedacorner,`Ohmyearsandwhiskers,howlateit'sgetting!'Shewasclosebehinditwhensheturnedthecorner,buttheRabbitwasnolongertobeseen:shefoundherselfinalong,lowhall,whichwaslitupbyarowoflampshangingfromtheroof.

    Thereweredoorsallroundthehall,buttheywerealllocked;andwhenAlicehadbeenallthewaydownonesideanduptheother,tryingeverydoor,shewalkedsadlydownthemiddle,wonderinghowshewasevertogetoutagain.

    Suddenlyshecameuponalittlethree-leggedtable,allmadeofsolidglass;therewasnothingonitexceptatinygoldenkey,andAlice'sfirstthoughtwasthatitmightbelongtooneofthedoorsofthehall;but,alas!eitherthelocksweretoolarge,orthekeywastoosmall,butatanyrateitwouldnotopenanyof

    them.However,onthesecondtimeround,shecameuponalowcurtainshehadnotnoticedbefore,andbehinditwasalittledooraboutfifteenincheshigh:shetriedthelittlegoldenkeyinthelock,andtohergreatdelightitfitted!

    Aliceopenedthedoorandfoundthatitledintoasmallpassage,notmuchlargerthanarat-hole:shekneltdownandlookedalongthepassageintotheloveliestgardenyoueversaw.Howshelongedtogetoutofthatdarkhall,andwanderaboutamongthosebedsofbrightflowersandthosecoolfountains,butshecouldnotevengetherheadthoughthedoorway;`andevenifmyheadwouldgothrough,'thoughtpoorAlice,`itwouldbeofverylittleusewithoutmyshoulders.Oh,howIwish

    Icouldshutuplikeatelescope!IthinkIcould,ifIonlyknowhowtobegin.'For,yousee,somanyout-of-the-waythingshadhappenedlately,thatAlicehadbeguntothinkthatveryfewthingsindeedwerereallyimpossible.

    Thereseemedtobenouseinwaitingbythelittledoor,soshewentbacktothetable,halfhopingshemightfindanotherkeyonit,oratanyrateabookofrulesforshuttingpeopleupliketelescopes:thistimeshefoundalittlebottleonit,(`whichcertainlywasnotherebefore,'saidAlice,)androundtheneckofthebottlewasapaperlabel,withthewords`DRINKME'beautifullyprintedonitinlargeletters.

    Itwasallverywelltosay`Drinkme,'butthewiselittleAlicewasnotgoingtodoTHATinahurry.`No,I'lllookfirst,'shesaid,`andseewhetherit'smarked"poison"ornot';forshehadreadseveralnicelittlehistoriesaboutchildrenwhohadgotburnt,andeatenupbywildbeastsandotherunpleasantthings,allbecausetheyWOULDnotrememberthesimplerulestheirfriendshadtaughtthem:suchas,thatared-hotpokerwillburnyouifyouholdittoolong;andthatifyoucutyourfingerVERYdeeplywithaknife,itusuallybleeds;andshehadneverforgottenthat,ifyoudrinkmuchfromabottlemarked

  • 8/4/2019 Alice 30

    8/65

    `poison,'itisalmostcertaintodisagreewithyou,soonerorlater.

    However,thisbottlewasNOTmarked`poison,'soAliceventuredtotasteit,andfindingitverynice,(ithad,infact,asortofmixedflavourofcherry-tart,custard,pine-apple,roastturkey,toffee,andhotbutteredtoast,)sheverysoonfinisheditoff.

    *******

    ******

    *******

    `Whatacuriousfeeling!'saidAlice;`Imustbeshuttinguplikeatelescope.'

    Andsoitwasindeed:shewasnowonlytenincheshigh,andherfacebrightenedupatthethoughtthatshewasnowtherightsizeforgoingthroughthelittledoorintothatlovelygarden.First,however,shewaitedforafewminutestoseeifshewasgoingtoshrinkanyfurther:shefeltalittlenervousaboutthis;`foritmightend,youknow,'saidAlicetoherself,`inmy

    goingoutaltogether,likeacandle.IwonderwhatIshouldbelikethen?'Andshetriedtofancywhattheflameofacandleislikeafterthecandleisblownout,forshecouldnotremembereverhavingseensuchathing.

    Afterawhile,findingthatnothingmorehappened,shedecidedongoingintothegardenatonce;but,alasforpoorAlice!whenshegottothedoor,shefoundshehadforgottenthelittlegoldenkey,andwhenshewentbacktothetableforit,shefoundshecouldnotpossiblyreachit:shecouldseeitquiteplainlythroughtheglass,andshetriedherbesttoclimbuponeofthelegsofthetable,butitwastooslippery;andwhenshehadtiredherselfoutwithtrying,

    thepoorlittlethingsatdownandcried.

    `Come,there'snouseincryinglikethat!'saidAlicetoherself,rathersharply;`Iadviseyoutoleaveoffthisminute!'Shegenerallygaveherselfverygoodadvice,(thoughsheveryseldomfollowedit),andsometimesshescoldedherselfsoseverelyastobringtearsintohereyes;andoncesherememberedtryingtoboxherownearsforhavingcheatedherselfinagameofcroquetshewasplayingagainstherself,forthiscuriouschildwasveryfondofpretendingtobetwopeople.`Butit'snousenow,'thoughtpoorAlice,`topretendtobetwopeople!Why,there'shardlyenoughofmelefttomakeONErespectableperson!'

    Soonhereyefellonalittleglassboxthatwaslyingunderthetable:sheopenedit,andfoundinitaverysmallcake,onwhichthewords`EATME'werebeautifullymarkedincurrants.`Well,I'lleatit,'saidAlice,`andifitmakesmegrowlarger,Icanreachthekey;andifitmakesmegrowsmaller,Icancreepunderthedoor;soeitherwayI'llgetintothegarden,andIdon'tcarewhichhappens!'

    Sheatealittlebit,andsaidanxiouslytoherself,`Which

  • 8/4/2019 Alice 30

    9/65

    way?Whichway?',holdingherhandonthetopofherheadtofeelwhichwayitwasgrowing,andshewasquitesurprisedtofindthatsheremainedthesamesize:tobesure,thisgenerallyhappenswhenoneeatscake,butAlicehadgotsomuchintothewayofexpectingnothingbutout-of-the-waythingstohappen,thatitseemedquitedullandstupidforlifetogooninthecommonway.

    Soshesettowork,andverysoonfinishedoffthecake.

    *******

    ******

    *******

    CHAPTERII

    ThePoolofTears

    `Curiouserandcuriouser!'criedAlice(shewassomuchsurprised,thatforthemomentshequiteforgothowtospeakgoodEnglish);`nowI'mopeningoutlikethelargesttelescopethateverwas!Good-bye,feet!'(forwhenshelookeddownatherfeet,theyseemedtobealmostoutofsight,theyweregettingsofaroff).`Oh,mypoorlittlefeet,Iwonderwhowillputonyourshoesandstockingsforyounow,dears?I'msure_I_shan'tbeable!Ishallbeagreatdealtoofarofftotroublemyselfaboutyou:youmustmanagethebestwayyoucan;--butImustbekindtothem,'thoughtAlice,`orperhapstheywon'twalkthewayIwanttogo!Letmesee:I'llgivethemanewpairofbootseveryChristmas.'

    Andshewentonplanningtoherselfhowshewouldmanageit.`Theymustgobythecarrier,'shethought;`andhowfunnyit'llseem,sendingpresentstoone'sownfeet!Andhowoddthedirectionswilllook!

    ALICE'SRIGHTFOOT,ESQ.HEARTHRUG,NEARTHEFENDER,(WITHALICE'SLOVE).

    Ohdear,whatnonsenseI'mtalking!'

    Justthenherheadstruckagainsttheroofofthehall:in

    factshewasnowmorethanninefeethigh,andsheatoncetookupthelittlegoldenkeyandhurriedofftothegardendoor.

    PoorAlice!Itwasasmuchasshecoulddo,lyingdownononeside,tolookthroughintothegardenwithoneeye;buttogetthroughwasmorehopelessthanever:shesatdownandbegantocryagain.

    `Yououghttobeashamedofyourself,'saidAlice,`agreatgirllikeyou,'(shemightwellsaythis),`togooncryingin

  • 8/4/2019 Alice 30

    10/65

    thisway!Stopthismoment,Itellyou!'Butshewentonallthesame,sheddinggallonsoftears,untiltherewasalargepoolallroundher,aboutfourinchesdeepandreachinghalfdownthehall.

    Afteratimesheheardalittlepatteringoffeetinthedistance,andshehastilydriedhereyestoseewhatwascoming.ItwastheWhiteRabbitreturning,splendidlydressed,withapairofwhitekidglovesinonehandandalargefanintheother:hecametrottingalonginagreathurry,mutteringtohimselfashecame,`Oh!theDuchess,theDuchess!Oh!won'tshebesavageifI'vekeptherwaiting!'Alicefeltsodesperatethatshewasreadytoaskhelpofanyone;so,whentheRabbitcamenearher,shebegan,inalow,timidvoice,`Ifyouplease,sir--'TheRabbitstartedviolently,droppedthewhitekidglovesandthefan,andskurriedawayintothedarknessashardashecouldgo.

    Alicetookupthefanandgloves,and,asthehallwasveryhot,shekeptfanningherselfallthetimeshewentontalking:`Dear,dear!Howqueereverythingisto-day!Andyesterdaythingswentonjustasusual.IwonderifI'vebeenchangedinthenight?Letmethink:wasIthesamewhenIgotupthismorning?IalmostthinkIcanrememberfeelingalittle

    different.ButifI'mnotthesame,thenextquestionis,WhointheworldamI?Ah,THAT'Sthegreatpuzzle!'Andshebeganthinkingoverallthechildrensheknewthatwereofthesameageasherself,toseeifshecouldhavebeenchangedforanyofthem.

    `I'msureI'mnotAda,'shesaid,`forherhairgoesinsuchlongringlets,andminedoesn'tgoinringletsatall;andI'msureIcan'tbeMabel,forIknowallsortsofthings,andshe,oh!sheknowssuchaverylittle!Besides,SHE'Sshe,andI'mI,and--ohdear,howpuzzlingitallis!I'lltryifIknowallthethingsIusedtoknow.Letmesee:fourtimesfiveistwelve,andfourtimessixisthirteen,andfourtimessevenis--ohdear!

    Ishallnevergettotwentyatthatrate!However,theMultiplicationTabledoesn'tsignify:let'stryGeography.LondonisthecapitalofParis,andParisisthecapitalofRome,andRome--no,THAT'Sallwrong,I'mcertain!ImusthavebeenchangedforMabel!I'lltryandsay"Howdoththelittle--"'andshecrossedherhandsonherlapasifsheweresayinglessons,andbegantorepeatit,buthervoicesoundedhoarseandstrange,andthewordsdidnotcomethesameastheyusedtodo:--

    `HowdoththelittlecrocodileImprovehisshiningtail,AndpourthewatersoftheNileOneverygoldenscale!

    `Howcheerfullyheseemstogrin,Howneatlyspreadhisclaws,AndwelcomelittlefishesinWithgentlysmilingjaws!'

    `I'msurethosearenottherightwords,'saidpoorAlice,andhereyesfilledwithtearsagainasshewenton,`ImustbeMabelafterall,andIshallhavetogoandliveinthatpokylittlehouse,andhavenexttonotoystoplaywith,andoh!everso

  • 8/4/2019 Alice 30

    11/65

    manylessonstolearn!No,I'vemadeupmymindaboutit;ifI'mMabel,I'llstaydownhere!It'llbenousetheirputtingtheirheadsdownandsaying"Comeupagain,dear!"Ishallonlylookupandsay"WhoamIthen?Tellmethatfirst,andthen,ifIlikebeingthatperson,I'llcomeup:ifnot,I'llstaydownheretillI'msomebodyelse"--but,ohdear!'criedAlice,withasuddenburstoftears,`IdowishtheyWOULDputtheirheadsdown!IamsoVERYtiredofbeingallalonehere!'

    Asshesaidthisshelookeddownatherhands,andwassurprisedtoseethatshehadputononeoftheRabbit'slittlewhitekidgloveswhileshewastalking.`HowCANIhavedonethat?'shethought.`Imustbegrowingsmallagain.'Shegotupandwenttothetabletomeasureherselfbyit,andfoundthat,asnearlyasshecouldguess,shewasnowabouttwofeethigh,andwasgoingonshrinkingrapidly:shesoonfoundoutthatthecauseofthiswasthefanshewasholding,andshedroppedithastily,justintimetoavoidshrinkingawayaltogether.

    `ThatWASanarrowescape!'saidAlice,agooddealfrightenedatthesuddenchange,butverygladtofindherselfstillinexistence;`andnowforthegarden!'andsheranwithallspeedbacktothelittledoor:but,alas!thelittledoorwasshutagain,andthelittlegoldenkeywaslyingontheglasstableas

    before,`andthingsareworsethanever,'thoughtthepoorchild,`forIneverwassosmallasthisbefore,never!AndIdeclareit'stoobad,thatitis!'

    Asshesaidthesewordsherfootslipped,andinanothermoment,splash!shewasuptoherchininsaltwater.Herfirstideawasthatshehadsomehowfallenintothesea,`andinthatcaseIcangobackbyrailway,'shesaidtoherself.(Alicehadbeentotheseasideonceinherlife,andhadcometothegeneralconclusion,thatwhereveryougotoontheEnglishcoastyoufindanumberofbathingmachinesinthesea,somechildrendigginginthesandwithwoodenspades,thenarowoflodginghouses,andbehindthemarailwaystation.)However,shesoonmadeoutthat

    shewasinthepooloftearswhichshehadweptwhenshewasninefeethigh.

    `IwishIhadn'tcriedsomuch!'saidAlice,assheswamabout,tryingtofindherwayout.`Ishallbepunishedforitnow,Isuppose,bybeingdrownedinmyowntears!ThatWILLbeaqueerthing,tobesure!However,everythingisqueerto-day.'

    Justthensheheardsomethingsplashingaboutinthepoolalittlewayoff,andsheswamnearertomakeoutwhatitwas:atfirstshethoughtitmustbeawalrusorhippopotamus,butthensherememberedhowsmallshewasnow,andshesoonmadeoutthatitwasonlyamousethathadslippedinlikeherself.

    `Woulditbeofanyuse,now,'thoughtAlice,`tospeaktothismouse?Everythingissoout-of-the-waydownhere,thatIshouldthinkverylikelyitcantalk:atanyrate,there'snoharmintrying.'Soshebegan:`OMouse,doyouknowthewayoutofthispool?Iamverytiredofswimmingabouthere,OMouse!'(Alicethoughtthismustbetherightwayofspeakingtoamouse:shehadneverdonesuchathingbefore,butsherememberedhavingseeninherbrother'sLatinGrammar,`Amouse--ofamouse--toamouse--amouse--Omouse!')TheMouselookedatherrather

  • 8/4/2019 Alice 30

    12/65

    inquisitively,andseemedtohertowinkwithoneofitslittleeyes,butitsaidnothing.

    `Perhapsitdoesn'tunderstandEnglish,'thoughtAlice;`Idaresayit'saFrenchmouse,comeoverwithWilliamtheConqueror.'(For,withallherknowledgeofhistory,Alicehadnoveryclearnotionhowlongagoanythinghadhappened.)Soshebeganagain:`Ouestmachatte?'whichwasthefirstsentenceinherFrenchlesson-book.TheMousegaveasuddenleapoutofthewater,andseemedtoquiveralloverwithfright.`Oh,Ibegyourpardon!'criedAlicehastily,afraidthatshehadhurtthepooranimal'sfeelings.`Iquiteforgotyoudidn'tlikecats.'

    `Notlikecats!'criedtheMouse,inashrill,passionatevoice.`WouldYOUlikecatsifyouwereme?'

    `Well,perhapsnot,'saidAliceinasoothingtone:`don'tbeangryaboutit.AndyetIwishIcouldshowyouourcatDinah:Ithinkyou'dtakeafancytocatsifyoucouldonlyseeher.Sheissuchadearquietthing,'Alicewenton,halftoherself,assheswamlazilyaboutinthepool,`andshesitspurringsonicelybythefire,lickingherpawsandwashingherface--andsheissuchanicesoftthingtonurse--andshe'ssuchacapitaloneforcatchingmice--oh,Ibegyourpardon!'criedAliceagain,

    forthistimetheMousewasbristlingallover,andshefeltcertainitmustbereallyoffended.`Wewon'ttalkaboutheranymoreifyou'drathernot.'

    `Weindeed!'criedtheMouse,whowastremblingdowntotheendofhistail.`AsifIwouldtalkonsuchasubject!OurfamilyalwaysHATEDcats:nasty,low,vulgarthings!Don'tletmehearthenameagain!'

    `Iwon'tindeed!'saidAlice,inagreathurrytochangethesubjectofconversation.`Areyou--areyoufond--of--ofdogs?'TheMousedidnotanswer,soAlicewentoneagerly:`ThereissuchanicelittledognearourhouseIshouldliketoshowyou!

    Alittlebright-eyedterrier,youknow,withoh,suchlongcurlybrownhair!Andit'llfetchthingswhenyouthrowthem,andit'llsitupandbegforitsdinner,andallsortsofthings--Ican'trememberhalfofthem--anditbelongstoafarmer,youknow,andhesaysit'ssouseful,it'sworthahundredpounds!Hesaysitkillsalltheratsand--ohdear!'criedAliceinasorrowfultone,`I'mafraidI'veoffendeditagain!'FortheMousewasswimmingawayfromherashardasitcouldgo,andmakingquiteacommotioninthepoolasitwent.

    Soshecalledsoftlyafterit,`Mousedear!Docomebackagain,andwewon'ttalkaboutcatsordogseither,ifyoudon'tlikethem!'WhentheMouseheardthis,itturnedroundandswam

    slowlybacktoher:itsfacewasquitepale(withpassion,Alicethought),anditsaidinalowtremblingvoice,`Letusgettotheshore,andthenI'lltellyoumyhistory,andyou'llunderstandwhyitisIhatecatsanddogs.'

    Itwashightimetogo,forthepoolwasgettingquitecrowdedwiththebirdsandanimalsthathadfallenintoit:therewereaDuckandaDodo,aLoryandanEaglet,andseveralothercuriouscreatures.Aliceledtheway,andthewholepartyswamtotheshore.

  • 8/4/2019 Alice 30

    13/65

    CHAPTERIII

    ACaucus-RaceandaLongTale

    Theywereindeedaqueer-lookingpartythatassembledonthebank--thebirdswithdraggledfeathers,theanimalswiththeirfurclingingclosetothem,andalldrippingwet,cross,anduncomfortable.

    Thefirstquestionofcoursewas,howtogetdryagain:theyhadaconsultationaboutthis,andafterafewminutesitseemedquitenaturaltoAlicetofindherselftalkingfamiliarlywiththem,asifshehadknownthemallherlife.Indeed,shehadquitealongargumentwiththeLory,whoatlastturnedsulky,andwouldonlysay,`Iamolderthanyou,andmustknowbetter';andthisAlicewouldnotallowwithoutknowinghowolditwas,and,astheLorypositivelyrefusedtotellitsage,therewasnomoretobesaid.

    AtlasttheMouse,whoseemedtobeapersonofauthorityamong

    them,calledout,`Sitdown,allofyou,andlistentome!I'LLsoonmakeyoudryenough!'Theyallsatdownatonce,inalargering,withtheMouseinthemiddle.Alicekepthereyesanxiouslyfixedonit,forshefeltsureshewouldcatchabadcoldifshedidnotgetdryverysoon.

    `Ahem!'saidtheMousewithanimportantair,`areyouallready?ThisisthedriestthingIknow.Silenceallround,ifyouplease!"WilliamtheConqueror,whosecausewasfavouredbythepope,wassoonsubmittedtobytheEnglish,whowantedleaders,andhadbeenoflatemuchaccustomedtousurpationandconquest.EdwinandMorcar,theearlsofMerciaandNorthumbria--"'

    `Ugh!'saidtheLory,withashiver.

    `Ibegyourpardon!'saidtheMouse,frowning,butverypolitely:`Didyouspeak?'

    `NotI!'saidtheLoryhastily.

    `Ithoughtyoudid,'saidtheMouse.`--Iproceed."EdwinandMorcar,theearlsofMerciaandNorthumbria,declaredforhim:andevenStigand,thepatrioticarchbishopofCanterbury,founditadvisable--"'

    `FoundWHAT?'saidtheDuck.

    `FoundIT,'theMouserepliedrathercrossly:`ofcourseyouknowwhat"it"means.'

    `Iknowwhat"it"meanswellenough,whenIfindathing,'saidtheDuck:`it'sgenerallyafrogoraworm.Thequestionis,whatdidthearchbishopfind?'

    TheMousedidnotnoticethisquestion,buthurriedlywenton,`"--founditadvisabletogowithEdgarAthelingtomeetWilliam

  • 8/4/2019 Alice 30

    14/65

    andofferhimthecrown.William'sconductatfirstwasmoderate.ButtheinsolenceofhisNormans--"Howareyougettingonnow,mydear?'itcontinued,turningtoAliceasitspoke.

    `Aswetasever,'saidAliceinamelancholytone:`itdoesn'tseemtodrymeatall.'

    `Inthatcase,'saidtheDodosolemnly,risingtoitsfeet,`Imovethatthemeetingadjourn,fortheimmediateadoptionofmoreenergeticremedies--'

    `SpeakEnglish!'saidtheEaglet.`Idon'tknowthemeaningofhalfthoselongwords,and,what'smore,Idon'tbelieveyoudoeither!'AndtheEagletbentdownitsheadtohideasmile:someoftheotherbirdstitteredaudibly.

    `WhatIwasgoingtosay,'saidtheDodoinanoffendedtone,`was,thatthebestthingtogetusdrywouldbeaCaucus-race.'

    `WhatISaCaucus-race?'saidAlice;notthatshewantedmuchtoknow,buttheDodohadpausedasifitthoughtthatSOMEBODYoughttospeak,andnooneelseseemedinclinedtosayanything.

    `Why,'saidtheDodo,`thebestwaytoexplainitistodoit.'(And,asyoumightliketotrythethingyourself,somewinterday,IwilltellyouhowtheDodomanagedit.)

    Firstitmarkedoutarace-course,inasortofcircle,(`theexactshapedoesn'tmatter,'itsaid,)andthenallthepartywereplacedalongthecourse,hereandthere.Therewasno`One,two,three,andaway,'buttheybeganrunningwhentheyliked,andleftoffwhentheyliked,sothatitwasnoteasytoknowwhentheracewasover.However,whentheyhadbeenrunninghalfanhourorso,andwerequitedryagain,theDodosuddenlycalledout`Theraceisover!'andtheyallcrowdedroundit,panting,andasking,`Butwhohaswon?'

    ThisquestiontheDodocouldnotanswerwithoutagreatdealofthought,anditsatforalongtimewithonefingerpresseduponitsforehead(thepositioninwhichyouusuallyseeShakespeare,inthepicturesofhim),whiletherestwaitedinsilence.AtlasttheDodosaid,`EVERYBODYhaswon,andallmusthaveprizes.'

    `Butwhoistogivetheprizes?'quiteachorusofvoicesasked.

    `Why,SHE,ofcourse,'saidtheDodo,pointingtoAlicewithonefinger;andthewholepartyatoncecrowdedroundher,

    callingoutinaconfusedway,`Prizes!Prizes!'

    Alicehadnoideawhattodo,andindespairsheputherhandinherpocket,andpulledoutaboxofcomfits,(luckilythesaltwaterhadnotgotintoit),andhandedthemroundasprizes.Therewasexactlyonea-pieceallround.

    `Butshemusthaveaprizeherself,youknow,'saidtheMouse.

    `Ofcourse,'theDodorepliedverygravely.`Whatelsehave

  • 8/4/2019 Alice 30

    15/65

    yougotinyourpocket?'hewenton,turningtoAlice.

    `Onlyathimble,'saidAlicesadly.

    `Handitoverhere,'saidtheDodo.

    Thentheyallcrowdedroundheroncemore,whiletheDodosolemnlypresentedthethimble,saying`Webegyouracceptanceofthiselegantthimble';and,whenithadfinishedthisshortspeech,theyallcheered.

    Alicethoughtthewholethingveryabsurd,buttheyalllookedsogravethatshedidnotdaretolaugh;and,asshecouldnotthinkofanythingtosay,shesimplybowed,andtookthethimble,lookingassolemnasshecould.

    Thenextthingwastoeatthecomfits:thiscausedsomenoiseandconfusion,asthelargebirdscomplainedthattheycouldnottastetheirs,andthesmalloneschokedandhadtobepattedontheback.However,itwasoveratlast,andtheysatdownagaininaring,andbeggedtheMousetotellthemsomethingmore.

    `Youpromisedtotellmeyourhistory,youknow,'saidAlice,`andwhyitisyouhate--CandD,'sheaddedinawhisper,half

    afraidthatitwouldbeoffendedagain.

    `Mineisalongandasadtale!'saidtheMouse,turningtoAlice,andsighing.

    `ItISalongtail,certainly,'saidAlice,lookingdownwithwonderattheMouse'stail;`butwhydoyoucallitsad?'AndshekeptonpuzzlingaboutitwhiletheMousewasspeaking,sothatherideaofthetalewassomethinglikethis:--

    `Furysaidtoamouse,Thathemetinthe

    house,"Letusbothgotolaw:IwillprosecuteYOU.--Come,I'lltakenodenial;Wemusthaveatrial:ForreallythismorningI'venothing

    todo."Saidthemousetothecur,"Suchatrial,dearSir,Withnojuryorjudge,wouldbe

  • 8/4/2019 Alice 30

    16/65

    wastingourbreath.""I'llbejudge,I'llbejury,"SaidcunningoldFury:"I'lltrythewholecause,andcondemnyoutodeath."'

    `Youarenotattending!'saidtheMousetoAliceseverely.`Whatareyouthinkingof?'

    `Ibegyourpardon,'saidAliceveryhumbly:`youhadgotto

    thefifthbend,Ithink?'

    `IhadNOT!'criedtheMouse,sharplyandveryangrily.

    `Aknot!'saidAlice,alwaysreadytomakeherselfuseful,andlookinganxiouslyabouther.`Oh,doletmehelptoundoit!'

    `Ishalldonothingofthesort,'saidtheMouse,gettingupandwalkingaway.`Youinsultmebytalkingsuchnonsense!'

    `Ididn'tmeanit!'pleadedpoorAlice.`Butyou'resoeasilyoffended,youknow!'

    TheMouseonlygrowledinreply.

    `Pleasecomebackandfinishyourstory!'Alicecalledafterit;andtheothersalljoinedinchorus,`Yes,pleasedo!'buttheMouseonlyshookitsheadimpatiently,andwalkedalittlequicker.

    `Whatapityitwouldn'tstay!'sighedtheLory,assoonasitwasquiteoutofsight;andanoldCrabtooktheopportunityofsayingtoherdaughter`Ah,mydear!LetthisbealessontoyounevertoloseYOURtemper!'`Holdyourtongue,Ma!'saidtheyoungCrab,alittlesnappishly.`You'reenoughtotrythepatienceofanoyster!'

    `IwishIhadourDinahhere,IknowIdo!'saidAlicealoud,addressingnobodyinparticular.`She'dsoonfetchitback!'

    `AndwhoisDinah,ifImightventuretoaskthequestion?'saidtheLory.

    Alicerepliedeagerly,forshewasalwaysreadytotalkaboutherpet:`Dinah'sourcat.Andshe'ssuchacapitaloneforcatchingmiceyoucan'tthink!Andoh,Iwishyoucouldseeher

  • 8/4/2019 Alice 30

    17/65

    afterthebirds!Why,she'lleatalittlebirdassoonaslookatit!'

    Thisspeechcausedaremarkablesensationamongtheparty.Someofthebirdshurriedoffatonce:oneoldMagpiebeganwrappingitselfupverycarefully,remarking,`Ireallymustbegettinghome;thenight-airdoesn'tsuitmythroat!'andaCanarycalledoutinatremblingvoicetoitschildren,`Comeaway,mydears!It'shightimeyouwereallinbed!'Onvariouspretextstheyallmovedoff,andAlicewassoonleftalone.

    `IwishIhadn'tmentionedDinah!'shesaidtoherselfinamelancholytone.`Nobodyseemstolikeher,downhere,andI'msureshe'sthebestcatintheworld!Oh,mydearDinah!IwonderifIshalleverseeyouanymore!'AndherepoorAlicebegantocryagain,forshefeltverylonelyandlow-spirited.Inalittlewhile,however,sheagainheardalittlepatteringoffootstepsinthedistance,andshelookedupeagerly,halfhopingthattheMousehadchangedhismind,andwascomingbacktofinishhisstory.

    CHAPTERIV

    TheRabbitSendsinaLittleBill

    ItwastheWhiteRabbit,trottingslowlybackagain,andlookinganxiouslyaboutasitwent,asifithadlostsomething;andshehearditmutteringtoitself`TheDuchess!TheDuchess!Ohmydearpaws!Ohmyfurandwhiskers!She'llgetmeexecuted,assureasferretsareferrets!WhereCANIhavedroppedthem,Iwonder?'Aliceguessedinamomentthatitwaslookingforthefanandthepairofwhitekidgloves,andsheverygood-naturedlybeganhuntingaboutforthem,buttheywerenowheretobeseen--everythingseemedtohavechangedsinceher

    swiminthepool,andthegreathall,withtheglasstableandthelittledoor,hadvanishedcompletely.

    VerysoontheRabbitnoticedAlice,asshewenthuntingabout,andcalledouttoherinanangrytone,`Why,MaryAnn,whatAREyoudoingouthere?Runhomethismoment,andfetchmeapairofglovesandafan!Quick,now!'AndAlicewassomuchfrightenedthatsheranoffatonceinthedirectionitpointedto,withouttryingtoexplainthemistakeithadmade.

    `Hetookmeforhishousemaid,'shesaidtoherselfassheran.`Howsurprisedhe'llbewhenhefindsoutwhoIam!ButI'dbettertakehimhisfanandgloves--thatis,ifIcanfindthem.'

    Asshesaidthis,shecameuponaneatlittlehouse,onthedoorofwhichwasabrightbrassplatewiththename`W.RABBIT'engraveduponit.Shewentinwithoutknocking,andhurriedupstairs,ingreatfearlestsheshouldmeettherealMaryAnn,andbeturnedoutofthehousebeforeshehadfoundthefanandgloves.

    `Howqueeritseems,'Alicesaidtoherself,`tobegoingmessagesforarabbit!IsupposeDinah'llbesendingmeonmessagesnext!'Andshebeganfancyingthesortofthingthat

  • 8/4/2019 Alice 30

    18/65

    wouldhappen:`"MissAlice!Comeheredirectly,andgetreadyforyourwalk!""Cominginaminute,nurse!ButI'vegottoseethatthemousedoesn'tgetout."OnlyIdon'tthink,'Alicewenton,`thatthey'dletDinahstopinthehouseifitbeganorderingpeopleaboutlikethat!'

    Bythistimeshehadfoundherwayintoatidylittleroomwithatableinthewindow,andonit(asshehadhoped)afanandtwoorthreepairsoftinywhitekidgloves:shetookupthefanandapairofthegloves,andwasjustgoingtoleavetheroom,whenhereyefelluponalittlebottlethatstoodnearthelooking-glass.Therewasnolabelthistimewiththewords`DRINKME,'butneverthelesssheuncorkeditandputittoherlips.`IknowSOMETHINGinterestingissuretohappen,'shesaidtoherself,`wheneverIeatordrinkanything;soI'lljustseewhatthisbottledoes.Idohopeit'llmakemegrowlargeagain,forreallyI'mquitetiredofbeingsuchatinylittlething!'

    Itdidsoindeed,andmuchsoonerthanshehadexpected:beforeshehaddrunkhalfthebottle,shefoundherheadpressingagainsttheceiling,andhadtostooptosaveherneckfrombeingbroken.Shehastilyputdownthebottle,sayingtoherself`That'squiteenough--IhopeIshan'tgrowanymore--Asitis,Ican'tgetoutatthedoor--IdowishIhadn'tdrunkquiteso

    much!'

    Alas!itwastoolatetowishthat!Shewentongrowing,andgrowing,andverysoonhadtokneeldownonthefloor:inanotherminutetherewasnotevenroomforthis,andshetriedtheeffectoflyingdownwithoneelbowagainstthedoor,andtheotherarmcurledroundherhead.Stillshewentongrowing,and,asalastresource,sheputonearmoutofthewindow,andonefootupthechimney,andsaidtoherself`NowIcandonomore,whateverhappens.WhatWILLbecomeofme?'

    LuckilyforAlice,thelittlemagicbottlehadnowhaditsfulleffect,andshegrewnolarger:stillitwasveryuncomfortable,

    and,asthereseemedtobenosortofchanceofherevergettingoutoftheroomagain,nowondershefeltunhappy.

    `Itwasmuchpleasanterathome,'thoughtpoorAlice,`whenonewasn'talwaysgrowinglargerandsmaller,andbeingorderedaboutbymiceandrabbits.IalmostwishIhadn'tgonedownthatrabbit-hole--andyet--andyet--it'srathercurious,youknow,thissortoflife!IdowonderwhatCANhavehappenedtome!WhenIusedtoreadfairy-tales,Ifanciedthatkindofthingneverhappened,andnowhereIaminthemiddleofone!Thereoughttobeabookwrittenaboutme,thatthereought!AndwhenIgrowup,I'llwriteone--butI'mgrownupnow,'sheaddedinasorrowfultone;`atleastthere'snoroomtogrowupanymore

    HERE.'

    `Butthen,'thoughtAlice,`shallINEVERgetanyolderthanIamnow?That'llbeacomfort,oneway--nevertobeanoldwoman--butthen--alwaystohavelessonstolearn!Oh,Ishouldn'tlikeTHAT!'

    `Oh,youfoolishAlice!'sheansweredherself.`Howcanyoulearnlessonsinhere?Why,there'shardlyroomforYOU,andnoroomatallforanylesson-books!'

  • 8/4/2019 Alice 30

    19/65

    Andsoshewenton,takingfirstonesideandthentheother,andmakingquiteaconversationofitaltogether;butafterafewminutessheheardavoiceoutside,andstoppedtolisten.

    `MaryAnn!MaryAnn!'saidthevoice.`Fetchmemyglovesthismoment!'Thencamealittlepatteringoffeetonthestairs.AliceknewitwastheRabbitcomingtolookforher,andshetrembledtillsheshookthehouse,quiteforgettingthatshewasnowaboutathousandtimesaslargeastheRabbit,andhadnoreasontobeafraidofit.

    PresentlytheRabbitcameuptothedoor,andtriedtoopenit;but,asthedooropenedinwards,andAlice'selbowwaspressedhardagainstit,thatattemptprovedafailure.Alicehearditsaytoitself`ThenI'llgoroundandgetinatthewindow.'

    `THATyouwon't'thoughtAlice,and,afterwaitingtillshefanciedsheheardtheRabbitjustunderthewindow,shesuddenlyspreadoutherhand,andmadeasnatchintheair.Shedidnotgetholdofanything,butsheheardalittleshriekandafall,andacrashofbrokenglass,fromwhichsheconcludedthatitwasjustpossibleithadfallenintoacucumber-frame,orsomethingofthesort.

    Nextcameanangryvoice--theRabbit's--`Pat!Pat!Whereareyou?'Andthenavoiceshehadneverheardbefore,`SurethenI'mhere!Diggingforapples,yerhonour!'

    `Diggingforapples,indeed!'saidtheRabbitangrily.`Here!ComeandhelpmeoutofTHIS!'(Soundsofmorebrokenglass.)

    `Nowtellme,Pat,what'sthatinthewindow?'

    `Sure,it'sanarm,yerhonour!'(Hepronouncedit`arrum.')

    `Anarm,yougoose!Whoeversawonethatsize?Why,itfillsthewholewindow!'

    `Sure,itdoes,yerhonour:butit'sanarmforallthat.'

    `Well,it'sgotnobusinessthere,atanyrate:goandtakeitaway!'

    Therewasalongsilenceafterthis,andAlicecouldonlyhearwhispersnowandthen;suchas,`Sure,Idon'tlikeit,yerhonour,atall,atall!'`DoasItellyou,youcoward!'andatlastshespreadoutherhandagain,andmadeanothersnatchintheair.ThistimetherewereTWOlittleshrieks,andmoresoundsofbrokenglass.`Whatanumberofcucumber-framestheremustbe!'thoughtAlice.`Iwonderwhatthey'lldonext!Asfor

    pullingmeoutofthewindow,IonlywishtheyCOULD!I'msureIdon'twanttostayinhereanylonger!'

    Shewaitedforsometimewithouthearinganythingmore:atlastcamearumblingoflittlecartwheels,andthesoundofagoodmanyvoicesalltalkingtogether:shemadeoutthewords:`Where'stheotherladder?--Why,Ihadn'ttobringbutone;Bill'sgottheother--Bill!fetchithere,lad!--Here,put'emupatthiscorner--No,tie'emtogetherfirst--theydon'treachhalfhighenoughyet--Oh!they'lldowellenough;don'tbeparticular--

  • 8/4/2019 Alice 30

    20/65

    Here,Bill!catchholdofthisrope--Willtheroofbear?--Mindthatlooseslate--Oh,it'scomingdown!Headsbelow!'(aloudcrash)--`Now,whodidthat?--ItwasBill,Ifancy--Who'stogodownthechimney?--Nay,Ishan't!YOUdoit!--ThatIwon't,then!--Bill'stogodown--Here,Bill!themastersaysyou'retogodownthechimney!'

    `Oh!SoBill'sgottocomedownthechimney,hashe?'saidAlicetoherself.`Shy,theyseemtoputeverythinguponBill!Iwouldn'tbeinBill'splaceforagooddeal:thisfireplaceisnarrow,tobesure;butITHINKIcankickalittle!'

    Shedrewherfootasfardownthechimneyasshecould,andwaitedtillsheheardalittleanimal(shecouldn'tguessofwhatsortitwas)scratchingandscramblingaboutinthechimneycloseaboveher:then,sayingtoherself`ThisisBill,'shegaveonesharpkick,andwaitedtoseewhatwouldhappennext.

    Thefirstthingsheheardwasageneralchorusof`TheregoesBill!'thentheRabbit'svoicealong--`Catchhim,youbythehedge!'thensilence,andthenanotherconfusionofvoices--`Holduphishead--Brandynow--Don'tchokehim--Howwasit,oldfellow?Whathappenedtoyou?Tellusallaboutit!'

    Lastcamealittlefeeble,squeakingvoice,(`That'sBill,'thoughtAlice,)`Well,Ihardlyknow--Nomore,thankye;I'mbetternow--butI'madealtooflusteredtotellyou--allIknowis,somethingcomesatmelikeaJack-in-the-box,andupIgoeslikeasky-rocket!'

    `Soyoudid,oldfellow!'saidtheothers.

    `Wemustburnthehousedown!'saidtheRabbit'svoice;andAlicecalledoutasloudasshecould,`Ifyoudo.I'llsetDinahatyou!'

    Therewasadeadsilenceinstantly,andAlicethoughtto

    herself,`IwonderwhattheyWILLdonext!Iftheyhadanysense,they'dtaketheroofoff.'Afteraminuteortwo,theybeganmovingaboutagain,andAliceheardtheRabbitsay,`Abarrowfulwilldo,tobeginwith.'

    `AbarrowfulofWHAT?'thoughtAlice;butshehadnotlongtodoubt,forthenextmomentashoweroflittlepebblescamerattlinginatthewindow,andsomeofthemhitherintheface.`I'llputastoptothis,'shesaidtoherself,andshoutedout,`You'dbetternotdothatagain!'whichproducedanotherdeadsilence.

    Alicenoticedwithsomesurprisethatthepebbleswereall

    turningintolittlecakesastheylayonthefloor,andabrightideacameintoherhead.`IfIeatoneofthesecakes,'shethought,`it'ssuretomakeSOMEchangeinmysize;andasitcan'tpossiblymakemelarger,itmustmakemesmaller,Isuppose.'

    Sosheswallowedoneofthecakes,andwasdelightedtofindthatshebeganshrinkingdirectly.Assoonasshewassmallenoughtogetthroughthedoor,sheranoutofthehouse,andfoundquiteacrowdoflittleanimalsandbirdswaitingoutside.

  • 8/4/2019 Alice 30

    21/65

    ThepoorlittleLizard,Bill,wasinthemiddle,beingheldupbytwoguinea-pigs,whoweregivingitsomethingoutofabottle.TheyallmadearushatAlicethemomentsheappeared;butsheranoffashardasshecould,andsoonfoundherselfsafeinathickwood.

    `ThefirstthingI'vegottodo,'saidAlicetoherself,asshewanderedaboutinthewood,`istogrowtomyrightsizeagain;andthesecondthingistofindmywayintothatlovelygarden.Ithinkthatwillbethebestplan.'

    Itsoundedanexcellentplan,nodoubt,andveryneatlyandsimplyarranged;theonlydifficultywas,thatshehadnotthesmallestideahowtosetaboutit;andwhileshewaspeeringaboutanxiouslyamongthetrees,alittlesharpbarkjustoverherheadmadeherlookupinagreathurry.

    Anenormouspuppywaslookingdownatherwithlargeroundeyes,andfeeblystretchingoutonepaw,tryingtotouchher.`Poorlittlething!'saidAlice,inacoaxingtone,andshetriedhardtowhistletoit;butshewasterriblyfrightenedallthetimeatthethoughtthatitmightbehungry,inwhichcaseitwouldbeverylikelytoeatherupinspiteofallhercoaxing.

    Hardlyknowingwhatshedid,shepickedupalittlebitofstick,andhelditouttothepuppy;whereuponthepuppyjumpedintotheairoffallitsfeetatonce,withayelpofdelight,andrushedatthestick,andmadebelievetoworryit;thenAlicedodgedbehindagreatthistle,tokeepherselffrombeingrunover;andthemomentsheappearedontheotherside,thepuppymadeanotherrushatthestick,andtumbledheadoverheelsinitshurrytogetholdofit;thenAlice,thinkingitwasverylikehavingagameofplaywithacart-horse,andexpectingeverymomenttobetrampledunderitsfeet,ranroundthethistleagain;thenthepuppybeganaseriesofshortchargesatthestick,runningaverylittlewayforwardseachtimeandalongwayback,andbarkinghoarselyallthewhile,tillatlastitsat

    downagoodwayoff,panting,withitstonguehangingoutofitsmouth,anditsgreateyeshalfshut.

    ThisseemedtoAliceagoodopportunityformakingherescape;soshesetoffatonce,andrantillshewasquitetiredandoutofbreath,andtillthepuppy'sbarksoundedquitefaintinthedistance.

    `Andyetwhatadearlittlepuppyitwas!'saidAlice,assheleantagainstabuttercuptorestherself,andfannedherselfwithoneoftheleaves:`Ishouldhavelikedteachingittricksverymuch,if--ifI'donlybeentherightsizetodoit!Ohdear!I'dnearlyforgottenthatI'vegottogrowupagain!Let

    mesee--howISittobemanaged?IsupposeIoughttoeatordrinksomethingorother;butthegreatquestionis,what?'

    Thegreatquestioncertainlywas,what?Alicelookedallroundherattheflowersandthebladesofgrass,butshedidnotseeanythingthatlookedliketherightthingtoeatordrinkunderthecircumstances.Therewasalargemushroomgrowingnearher,aboutthesameheightasherself;andwhenshehadlookedunderit,andonbothsidesofit,andbehindit,itoccurredtoherthatshemightaswelllookandseewhatwasonthetopofit.

  • 8/4/2019 Alice 30

    22/65

    Shestretchedherselfupontiptoe,andpeepedovertheedgeofthemushroom,andhereyesimmediatelymetthoseofalargecaterpillar,thatwassittingonthetopwithitsarmsfolded,quietlysmokingalonghookah,andtakingnotthesmallestnoticeofherorofanythingelse.

    CHAPTERV

    AdvicefromaCaterpillar

    TheCaterpillarandAlicelookedateachotherforsometimeinsilence:atlasttheCaterpillartookthehookahoutofitsmouth,andaddressedherinalanguid,sleepyvoice.

    `WhoareYOU?'saidtheCaterpillar.

    Thiswasnotanencouragingopeningforaconversation.Alicereplied,rathershyly,`I--Ihardlyknow,sir,justatpresent--atleastIknowwhoIWASwhenIgotupthismorning,butIthinkImusthavebeenchangedseveraltimessincethen.'

    `Whatdoyoumeanbythat?'saidtheCaterpillarsternly.`Explainyourself!'

    `Ican'texplainMYSELF,I'mafraid,sir'saidAlice,`becauseI'mnotmyself,yousee.'

    `Idon'tsee,'saidtheCaterpillar.

    `I'mafraidIcan'tputitmoreclearly,'Alicerepliedverypolitely,`forIcan'tunderstanditmyselftobeginwith;andbeingsomanydifferentsizesinadayisveryconfusing.'

    `Itisn't,'saidtheCaterpillar.

    `Well,perhapsyouhaven'tfounditsoyet,'saidAlice;`butwhenyouhavetoturnintoachrysalis--youwillsomeday,youknow--andthenafterthatintoabutterfly,Ishouldthinkyou'llfeelitalittlequeer,won'tyou?'

    `Notabit,'saidtheCaterpillar.

    `Well,perhapsyourfeelingsmaybedifferent,'saidAlice;`allIknowis,itwouldfeelveryqueertoME.'

    `You!'saidtheCaterpillarcontemptuously.`WhoareYOU?'

    Whichbroughtthembackagaintothebeginningoftheconversation.AlicefeltalittleirritatedattheCaterpillar'smakingsuchVERYshortremarks,andshedrewherselfupandsaid,verygravely,`Ithink,yououghttotellmewhoYOUare,first.'

    `Why?'saidtheCaterpillar.

    Herewasanotherpuzzlingquestion;andasAlicecouldnotthinkofanygoodreason,andastheCaterpillarseemedtobein

  • 8/4/2019 Alice 30

    23/65

    aVERYunpleasantstateofmind,sheturnedaway.

    `Comeback!'theCaterpillarcalledafterher.`I'vesomethingimportanttosay!'

    Thissoundedpromising,certainly:Aliceturnedandcamebackagain.

    `Keepyourtemper,'saidtheCaterpillar.

    `Isthatall?'saidAlice,swallowingdownherangeraswellasshecould.

    `No,'saidtheCaterpillar.

    Alicethoughtshemightaswellwait,asshehadnothingelsetodo,andperhapsafterallitmighttellhersomethingworthhearing.Forsomeminutesitpuffedawaywithoutspeaking,butatlastitunfoldeditsarms,tookthehookahoutofitsmouthagain,andsaid,`Soyouthinkyou'rechanged,doyou?'

    `I'mafraidIam,sir,'saidAlice;`Ican'trememberthingsasIused--andIdon'tkeepthesamesizefortenminutestogether!'

    `Can'trememberWHATthings?'saidtheCaterpillar.

    `Well,I'vetriedtosay"HOWDOTHTHELITTLEBUSYBEE,"butitallcamedifferent!'Alicerepliedinaverymelancholyvoice.

    `Repeat,"YOUAREOLD,FATHERWILLIAM,"'saidtheCaterpillar.

    Alicefoldedherhands,andbegan:--

    `Youareold,FatherWilliam,'theyoungmansaid,`Andyourhairhasbecomeverywhite;Andyetyouincessantlystandonyourhead--Doyouthink,atyourage,itisright?'

    `Inmyyouth,'FatherWilliamrepliedtohisson,`Ifeareditmightinjurethebrain;But,nowthatI'mperfectlysureIhavenone,Why,Idoitagainandagain.'

    `Youareold,'saidtheyouth,`asImentionedbefore,Andhavegrownmostuncommonlyfat;Yetyouturnedaback-somersaultinatthedoor--Pray,whatisthereasonofthat?'

    `Inmyyouth,'saidthesage,asheshookhisgreylocks,`Ikeptallmylimbsverysupple

    Bytheuseofthisointment--oneshillingthebox--Allowmetosellyouacouple?'

    `Youareold,'saidtheyouth,`andyourjawsaretooweakForanythingtougherthansuet;Yetyoufinishedthegoose,withthebonesandthebeak--Prayhowdidyoumanagetodoit?'

    `Inmyyouth,'saidhisfather,`Itooktothelaw,Andarguedeachcasewithmywife;

  • 8/4/2019 Alice 30

    24/65

    Andthemuscularstrength,whichitgavetomyjaw,Haslastedtherestofmylife.'

    `Youareold,'saidtheyouth,`onewouldhardlysupposeThatyoureyewasassteadyasever;Yetyoubalancedaneelontheendofyournose--Whatmadeyousoawfullyclever?'

    `Ihaveansweredthreequestions,andthatisenough,'Saidhisfather;`don'tgiveyourselfairs!DoyouthinkIcanlistenalldaytosuchstuff?Beoff,orI'llkickyoudownstairs!'

    `Thatisnotsaidright,'saidtheCaterpillar.

    `NotQUITEright,I'mafraid,'saidAlice,timidly;`someofthewordshavegotaltered.'

    `Itiswrongfrombeginningtoend,'saidtheCaterpillardecidedly,andtherewassilenceforsomeminutes.

    TheCaterpillarwasthefirsttospeak.

    `Whatsizedoyouwanttobe?'itasked.

    `Oh,I'mnotparticularastosize,'Alicehastilyreplied;`onlyonedoesn'tlikechangingsooften,youknow.'

    `IDON'Tknow,'saidtheCaterpillar.

    Alicesaidnothing:shehadneverbeensomuchcontradictedinherlifebefore,andshefeltthatshewaslosinghertemper.

    `Areyoucontentnow?'saidtheCaterpillar.

    `Well,IshouldliketobeaLITTLElarger,sir,ifyou

    wouldn'tmind,'saidAlice:`threeinchesissuchawretchedheighttobe.'

    `Itisaverygoodheightindeed!'saidtheCaterpillarangrily,rearingitselfuprightasitspoke(itwasexactlythreeincheshigh).

    `ButI'mnotusedtoit!'pleadedpoorAliceinapiteoustone.Andshethoughtofherself,`Iwishthecreatureswouldn'tbesoeasilyoffended!'

    `You'llgetusedtoitintime,'saidtheCaterpillar;anditputthehookahintoitsmouthandbegansmokingagain.

    ThistimeAlicewaitedpatientlyuntilitchosetospeakagain.InaminuteortwotheCaterpillartookthehookahoutofitsmouthandyawnedonceortwice,andshookitself.Thenitgotdownoffthemushroom,andcrawledawayinthegrass,merelyremarkingasitwent,`Onesidewillmakeyougrowtaller,andtheothersidewillmakeyougrowshorter.'

    `OnesideofWHAT?TheothersideofWHAT?'thoughtAlicetoherself.

  • 8/4/2019 Alice 30

    25/65

    `Ofthemushroom,'saidtheCaterpillar,justasifshehadaskeditaloud;andinanothermomentitwasoutofsight.

    Aliceremainedlookingthoughtfullyatthemushroomforaminute,tryingtomakeoutwhichwerethetwosidesofit;andasitwasperfectlyround,shefoundthisaverydifficultquestion.However,atlastshestretchedherarmsrounditasfarastheywouldgo,andbrokeoffabitoftheedgewitheachhand.

    `Andnowwhichiswhich?'shesaidtoherself,andnibbledalittleoftheright-handbittotrytheeffect:thenextmomentshefeltaviolentblowunderneathherchin:ithadstruckherfoot!

    Shewasagooddealfrightenedbythisverysuddenchange,butshefeltthattherewasnotimetobelost,asshewasshrinkingrapidly;soshesettoworkatoncetoeatsomeoftheotherbit.Herchinwaspressedsocloselyagainstherfoot,thattherewashardlyroomtoopenhermouth;butshediditatlast,andmanagedtoswallowamorselofthelefthandbit.

    *******

    ******

    *******

    `Come,myhead'sfreeatlast!'saidAliceinatoneofdelight,whichchangedintoalarminanothermoment,whenshefoundthathershoulderswerenowheretobefound:allshecouldsee,whenshelookeddown,wasanimmenselengthofneck,whichseemedtoriselikeastalkoutofaseaofgreenleavesthatlayfarbelowher.

    `WhatCANallthatgreenstuffbe?'saidAlice.`Andwhere

    HAVEmyshouldersgotto?Andoh,mypoorhands,howisitIcan'tseeyou?'Shewasmovingthemaboutasshespoke,butnoresultseemedtofollow,exceptalittleshakingamongthedistantgreenleaves.

    Asthereseemedtobenochanceofgettingherhandsuptoherhead,shetriedtogetherheaddowntothem,andwasdelightedtofindthatherneckwouldbendabouteasilyinanydirection,likeaserpent.Shehadjustsucceededincurvingitdownintoagracefulzigzag,andwasgoingtodiveinamongtheleaves,whichshefoundtobenothingbutthetopsofthetreesunderwhichshehadbeenwandering,whenasharphissmadeherdrawbackinahurry:alargepigeonhadflownintoherface,andwasbeating

    herviolentlywithitswings.

    `Serpent!'screamedthePigeon.

    `I'mNOTaserpent!'saidAliceindignantly.`Letmealone!'

    `Serpent,Isayagain!'repeatedthePigeon,butinamoresubduedtone,andaddedwithakindofsob,`I'vetriedeveryway,andnothingseemstosuitthem!'

  • 8/4/2019 Alice 30

    26/65

    `Ihaven'ttheleastideawhatyou'retalkingabout,'saidAlice.

    `I'vetriedtherootsoftrees,andI'vetriedbanks,andI'vetriedhedges,'thePigeonwenton,withoutattendingtoher;`butthoseserpents!There'snopleasingthem!'

    Alicewasmoreandmorepuzzled,butshethoughttherewasnouseinsayinganythingmoretillthePigeonhadfinished.

    `Asifitwasn'ttroubleenoughhatchingtheeggs,'saidthePigeon;`butImustbeonthelook-outforserpentsnightandday!Why,Ihaven'thadawinkofsleepthesethreeweeks!'

    `I'mverysorryyou'vebeenannoyed,'saidAlice,whowasbeginningtoseeitsmeaning.

    `AndjustasI'dtakenthehighesttreeinthewood,'continuedthePigeon,raisingitsvoicetoashriek,`andjustasIwasthinkingIshouldbefreeofthematlast,theymustneedscomewrigglingdownfromthesky!Ugh,Serpent!'

    `ButI'mNOTaserpent,Itellyou!'saidAlice.`I'ma--I'ma--'

    `Well!WHATareyou?'saidthePigeon.`Icanseeyou'retryingtoinventsomething!'

    `I--I'malittlegirl,'saidAlice,ratherdoubtfully,assherememberedthenumberofchangesshehadgonethroughthatday.

    `Alikelystoryindeed!'saidthePigeoninatoneofthedeepestcontempt.`I'veseenagoodmanylittlegirlsinmytime,butneverONEwithsuchaneckasthat!No,no!You'reaserpent;andthere'snousedenyingit.Isupposeyou'llbetellingmenextthatyounevertastedanegg!'

    `IHAVEtastedeggs,certainly,'saidAlice,whowasaverytruthfulchild;`butlittlegirlseateggsquiteasmuchasserpentsdo,youknow.'

    `Idon'tbelieveit,'saidthePigeon;`butiftheydo,whythenthey'reakindofserpent,that'sallIcansay.'

    ThiswassuchanewideatoAlice,thatshewasquitesilentforaminuteortwo,whichgavethePigeontheopportunityofadding,`You'relookingforeggs,IknowTHATwellenough;andwhatdoesitmattertomewhetheryou'realittlegirloraserpent?'

    `ItmattersagooddealtoME,'saidAlicehastily;`butI'mnotlookingforeggs,asithappens;andifIwas,Ishouldn'twantYOURS:Idon'tlikethemraw.'

    `Well,beoff,then!'saidthePigeoninasulkytone,asitsettleddownagainintoitsnest.Alicecroucheddownamongthetreesaswellasshecould,forherneckkeptgettingentangledamongthebranches,andeverynowandthenshehadtostopanduntwistit.Afterawhilesherememberedthatshestillheldthepiecesofmushroominherhands,andshesettoworkvery

  • 8/4/2019 Alice 30

    27/65

    carefully,nibblingfirstatoneandthenattheother,andgrowingsometimestallerandsometimesshorter,untilshehadsucceededinbringingherselfdowntoherusualheight.

    Itwassolongsinceshehadbeenanythingneartherightsize,thatitfeltquitestrangeatfirst;butshegotusedtoitinafewminutes,andbegantalkingtoherself,asusual.`Come,there'shalfmyplandonenow!Howpuzzlingallthesechangesare!I'mneversurewhatI'mgoingtobe,fromoneminutetoanother!However,I'vegotbacktomyrightsize:thenextthingis,togetintothatbeautifulgarden--howISthattobedone,Iwonder?'Asshesaidthis,shecamesuddenlyuponanopenplace,withalittlehouseinitaboutfourfeethigh.`Whoeverlivesthere,'thoughtAlice,`it'llneverdotocomeuponthemTHISsize:why,Ishouldfrightenthemoutoftheirwits!'Soshebegannibblingattherighthandbitagain,anddidnotventuretogonearthehousetillshehadbroughtherselfdowntonineincheshigh.

    CHAPTERVI

    PigandPepper

    Foraminuteortwoshestoodlookingatthehouse,andwonderingwhattodonext,whensuddenlyafootmaninliverycamerunningoutofthewood--(sheconsideredhimtobeafootmanbecausehewasinlivery:otherwise,judgingbyhisfaceonly,shewouldhavecalledhimafish)--andrappedloudlyatthedoorwithhisknuckles.Itwasopenedbyanotherfootmaninlivery,witharoundface,andlargeeyeslikeafrog;andbothfootmen,Alicenoticed,hadpowderedhairthatcurledallovertheirheads.Shefeltverycurioustoknowwhatitwasallabout,andcreptalittlewayoutofthewoodtolisten.

    TheFish-Footmanbeganbyproducingfromunderhisarmagreatletter,nearlyaslargeashimself,andthishehandedovertotheother,saying,inasolemntone,`FortheDuchess.AninvitationfromtheQueentoplaycroquet.'TheFrog-Footmanrepeated,inthesamesolemntone,onlychangingtheorderofthewordsalittle,`FromtheQueen.AninvitationfortheDuchesstoplaycroquet.'

    Thentheybothbowedlow,andtheircurlsgotentangledtogether.

    Alicelaughedsomuchatthis,thatshehadtorunbackintothewoodforfearoftheirhearingher;andwhenshenextpeeped

    outtheFish-Footmanwasgone,andtheotherwassittingonthegroundnearthedoor,staringstupidlyupintothesky.

    Alicewenttimidlyuptothedoor,andknocked.

    `There'snosortofuseinknocking,'saidtheFootman,`andthatfortworeasons.First,becauseI'monthesamesideofthedoorasyouare;secondly,becausethey'remakingsuchanoiseinside,noonecouldpossiblyhearyou.'Andcertainlytherewasamostextraordinarynoisegoingonwithin--aconstanthowling

  • 8/4/2019 Alice 30

    28/65

    andsneezing,andeverynowandthenagreatcrash,asifadishorkettlehadbeenbrokentopieces.

    `Please,then,'saidAlice,`howamItogetin?'

    `Theremightbesomesenseinyourknocking,'theFootmanwentonwithoutattendingtoher,`ifwehadthedoorbetweenus.Forinstance,ifyouwereINSIDE,youmightknock,andIcouldletyouout,youknow.'Hewaslookingupintotheskyallthetimehewasspeaking,andthisAlicethoughtdecidedlyuncivil.`Butperhapshecan'thelpit,'shesaidtoherself;`hiseyesaresoVERYnearlyatthetopofhishead.Butatanyratehemightanswerquestions.--HowamItogetin?'sherepeated,aloud.

    `Ishallsithere,'theFootmanremarked,`tilltomorrow--'

    Atthismomentthedoorofthehouseopened,andalargeplatecameskimmingout,straightattheFootman'shead:itjustgrazedhisnose,andbroketopiecesagainstoneofthetreesbehindhim.

    `--ornextday,maybe,'theFootmancontinuedinthesametone,exactlyasifnothinghadhappened.

    `HowamItogetin?'askedAliceagain,inaloudertone.

    `AREyoutogetinatall?'saidtheFootman.`That'sthefirstquestion,youknow.'

    Itwas,nodoubt:onlyAlicedidnotliketobetoldso.`It'sreallydreadful,'shemutteredtoherself,`thewayallthecreaturesargue.It'senoughtodriveonecrazy!'

    TheFootmanseemedtothinkthisagoodopportunityforrepeatinghisremark,withvariations.`Ishallsithere,'hesaid,`onandoff,fordaysanddays.'

    `ButwhatamItodo?'saidAlice.

    `Anythingyoulike,'saidtheFootman,andbeganwhistling.

    `Oh,there'snouseintalkingtohim,'saidAlicedesperately:`he'sperfectlyidiotic!'Andsheopenedthedoorandwentin.

    Thedoorledrightintoalargekitchen,whichwasfullofsmokefromoneendtotheother:theDuchesswassittingonathree-leggedstoolinthemiddle,nursingababy;thecookwasleaningoverthefire,stirringalargecauldronwhichseemedtobefullofsoup.

    `There'scertainlytoomuchpepperinthatsoup!'Alicesaidtoherself,aswellasshecouldforsneezing.

    Therewascertainlytoomuchofitintheair.EventheDuchesssneezedoccasionally;andasforthebaby,itwassneezingandhowlingalternatelywithoutamoment'spause.Theonlythingsinthekitchenthatdidnotsneeze,werethecook,andalargecatwhichwassittingonthehearthandgrinningfromeartoear.

  • 8/4/2019 Alice 30

    29/65

    `Pleasewouldyoutellme,'saidAlice,alittletimidly,forshewasnotquitesurewhetheritwasgoodmannersforhertospeakfirst,`whyyourcatgrinslikethat?'

    `It'saCheshirecat,'saidtheDuchess,`andthat'swhy.Pig!'

    ShesaidthelastwordwithsuchsuddenviolencethatAlicequitejumped;butshesawinanothermomentthatitwasaddressedtothebaby,andnottoher,soshetookcourage,andwentonagain:--

    `Ididn'tknowthatCheshirecatsalwaysgrinned;infact,Ididn'tknowthatcatsCOULDgrin.'

    `Theyallcan,'saidtheDuchess;`andmostof'emdo.'

    `Idon'tknowofanythatdo,'Alicesaidverypolitely,feelingquitepleasedtohavegotintoaconversation.

    `Youdon'tknowmuch,'saidtheDuchess;`andthat'safact.'

    Alicedidnotatalllikethetoneofthisremark,andthoughtitwouldbeaswelltointroducesomeothersubjectofconversation.Whileshewastryingtofixonone,thecooktook

    thecauldronofsoupoffthefire,andatoncesettoworkthrowingeverythingwithinherreachattheDuchessandthebaby--thefire-ironscamefirst;thenfollowedashowerofsaucepans,plates,anddishes.TheDuchesstooknonoticeofthemevenwhentheyhither;andthebabywashowlingsomuchalready,thatitwasquiteimpossibletosaywhethertheblowshurtitornot.

    `Oh,PLEASEmindwhatyou'redoing!'criedAlice,jumpingupanddowninanagonyofterror.`Oh,theregoeshisPRECIOUSnose';asanunusuallylargesaucepanflewclosebyit,andverynearlycarrieditoff.

    `Ifeverybodymindedtheirownbusiness,'theDuchesssaidina

    hoarsegrowl,`theworldwouldgoroundadealfasterthanitdoes.'

    `WhichwouldNOTbeanadvantage,'saidAlice,whofeltverygladtogetanopportunityofshowingoffalittleofherknowledge.`Justthinkofwhatworkitwouldmakewiththedayandnight!Youseetheearthtakestwenty-fourhourstoturnroundonitsaxis--'

    `Talkingofaxes,'saidtheDuchess,`chopoffherhead!'

    Aliceglancedratheranxiouslyatthecook,toseeifshemeanttotakethehint;butthecookwasbusilystirringthesoup,and

    seemednottobelistening,soshewentonagain:`Twenty-fourhours,ITHINK;orisittwelve?I--'

    `Oh,don'tbotherME,'saidtheDuchess;`Inevercouldabidefigures!'Andwiththatshebegannursingherchildagain,singingasortoflullabytoitasshedidso,andgivingitaviolentshakeattheendofeveryline:

    `Speakroughlytoyourlittleboy,Andbeathimwhenhesneezes:

  • 8/4/2019 Alice 30

    30/65

    Heonlydoesittoannoy,Becauseheknowsitteases.'

    CHORUS.

    (Inwhichthecookandthebabyjoined):--

    `Wow!wow!wow!'

    WhiletheDuchesssangthesecondverseofthesong,shekepttossingthebabyviolentlyupanddown,andthepoorlittlethinghowledso,thatAlicecouldhardlyhearthewords:--

    `Ispeakseverelytomyboy,Ibeathimwhenhesneezes;ForhecanthoroughlyenjoyThepepperwhenhepleases!'

    CHORUS.

    `Wow!wow!wow!'

    `Here!youmaynurseitabit,ifyoulike!'theDuchesssaidtoAlice,flingingthebabyatherasshespoke.`Imustgoand

    getreadytoplaycroquetwiththeQueen,'andshehurriedoutoftheroom.Thecookthrewafrying-panafterherasshewentout,butitjustmissedher.

    Alicecaughtthebabywithsomedifficulty,asitwasaqueer-shapedlittlecreature,andheldoutitsarmsandlegsinalldirections,`justlikeastar-fish,'thoughtAlice.Thepoorlittlethingwassnortinglikeasteam-enginewhenshecaughtit,andkeptdoublingitselfupandstraighteningitselfoutagain,sothataltogether,forthefirstminuteortwo,itwasasmuchasshecoulddotoholdit.

    Assoonasshehadmadeouttheproperwayofnursingit,

    (whichwastotwistitupintoasortofknot,andthenkeeptightholdofitsrightearandleftfoot,soastopreventitsundoingitself,)shecarrieditoutintotheopenair.`IFIdon'ttakethischildawaywithme,'thoughtAlice,`they'resuretokillitinadayortwo:wouldn'titbemurdertoleaveitbehind?'Shesaidthelastwordsoutloud,andthelittlethinggruntedinreply(ithadleftoffsneezingbythistime).`Don'tgrunt,'saidAlice;`that'snotatallaproperwayofexpressingyourself.'

    Thebabygruntedagain,andAlicelookedveryanxiouslyintoitsfacetoseewhatwasthematterwithit.TherecouldbenodoubtthatithadaVERYturn-upnose,muchmorelikeasnout

    thanarealnose;alsoitseyesweregettingextremelysmallforababy:altogetherAlicedidnotlikethelookofthethingatall.`Butperhapsitwasonlysobbing,'shethought,andlookedintoitseyesagain,toseeiftherewereanytears.

    No,therewerenotears.`Ifyou'regoingtoturnintoapig,mydear,'saidAlice,seriously,`I'llhavenothingmoretodowithyou.Mindnow!'Thepoorlittlethingsobbedagain(orgrunted,itwasimpossibletosaywhich),andtheywentonforsomewhileinsilence.

  • 8/4/2019 Alice 30

    31/65

    Alicewasjustbeginningtothinktoherself,`Now,whatamItodowiththiscreaturewhenIgetithome?'whenitgruntedagain,soviolently,thatshelookeddownintoitsfaceinsomealarm.ThistimetherecouldbeNOmistakeaboutit:itwasneithermorenorlessthanapig,andshefeltthatitwouldbequiteabsurdforhertocarryitfurther.

    Soshesetthelittlecreaturedown,andfeltquiterelievedtoseeittrotawayquietlyintothewood.`Ifithadgrownup,'shesaidtoherself,`itwouldhavemadeadreadfullyuglychild:butitmakesratherahandsomepig,Ithink.'Andshebeganthinkingoverotherchildrensheknew,whomightdoverywellaspigs,andwasjustsayingtoherself,`ifoneonlyknewtherightwaytochangethem--'whenshewasalittlestartledbyseeingtheCheshireCatsittingonaboughofatreeafewyardsoff.

    TheCatonlygrinnedwhenitsawAlice.Itlookedgood-natured,shethought:stillithadVERYlongclawsandagreatmanyteeth,soshefeltthatitoughttobetreatedwithrespect.

    `CheshirePuss,'shebegan,rathertimidly,asshedidnotatallknowwhetheritwouldlikethename:however,itonlygrinnedalittlewider.`Come,it'spleasedsofar,'thought

    Alice,andshewenton.`Wouldyoutellme,please,whichwayIoughttogofromhere?'

    `Thatdependsagooddealonwhereyouwanttogetto,'saidtheCat.

    `Idon'tmuchcarewhere--'saidAlice.

    `Thenitdoesn'tmatterwhichwayyougo,'saidtheCat.

    `--solongasIgetSOMEWHERE,'Aliceaddedasanexplanation.

    `Oh,you'resuretodothat,'saidtheCat,`ifyouonlywalk

    longenough.'

    Alicefeltthatthiscouldnotbedenied,soshetriedanotherquestion.`Whatsortofpeopleliveabouthere?'

    `InTHATdirection,'theCatsaid,wavingitsrightpawround,`livesaHatter:andinTHATdirection,'wavingtheotherpaw,`livesaMarchHare.Visiteitheryoulike:they'rebothmad.'

    `ButIdon'twanttogoamongmadpeople,'Aliceremarked.

    `Oh,youcan'thelpthat,'saidtheCat:`we'reallmadhere.I'mmad.You'remad.'

    `HowdoyouknowI'mmad?'saidAlice.

    `Youmustbe,'saidtheCat,`oryouwouldn'thavecomehere.'

    Alicedidn'tthinkthatproveditatall;however,shewenton`Andhowdoyouknowthatyou'remad?'

    `Tobeginwith,'saidtheCat,`adog'snotmad.Yougrantthat?'

  • 8/4/2019 Alice 30

    32/65

    `Isupposeso,'saidAlice.

    `Well,then,'theCatwenton,`yousee,adoggrowlswhenit'sangry,andwagsitstailwhenit'spleased.NowIgrowlwhenI'mpleased,andwagmytailwhenI'mangry.ThereforeI'mmad.'

    `Icallitpurring,notgrowling,'saidAlice.

    `Callitwhatyoulike,'saidtheCat.`DoyouplaycroquetwiththeQueento-day?'

    `Ishouldlikeitverymuch,'saidAlice,`butIhaven'tbeeninvitedyet.'

    `You'llseemethere,'saidtheCat,andvanished.

    Alicewasnotmuchsurprisedatthis,shewasgettingsousedtoqueerthingshappening.Whileshewaslookingattheplacewhereithadbeen,itsuddenlyappearedagain.

    `By-the-bye,whatbecameofthebaby?'saidtheCat.`I'dnearlyforgottentoask.'

    `Itturnedintoapig,'Alicequietlysaid,justasifithadcomebackinanaturalway.

    `Ithoughtitwould,'saidtheCat,andvanishedagain.

    Alicewaitedalittle,halfexpectingtoseeitagain,butitdidnotappear,andafteraminuteortwoshewalkedoninthedirectioninwhichtheMarchHarewassaidtolive.`I'veseenhattersbefore,'shesaidtoherself;`theMarchHarewillbemuchthemostinteresting,andperhapsasthisisMayitwon'tberavingmad--atleastnotsomadasitwasinMarch.'Asshesaidthis,shelookedup,andtherewastheCatagain,sittingonabranchofatree.

    `Didyousaypig,orfig?'saidtheCat.

    `Isaidpig,'repliedAlice;`andIwishyouwouldn'tkeepappearingandvanishingsosuddenly:youmakeonequitegiddy.'

    `Allright,'saidtheCat;andthistimeitvanishedquiteslowly,beginningwiththeendofthetail,andendingwiththegrin,whichremainedsometimeaftertherestofithadgone.

    `Well!I'veoftenseenacatwithoutagrin,'thoughtAlice;`butagrinwithoutacat!It'sthemostcuriousthingIeversawinmylife!'

    ShehadnotgonemuchfartherbeforeshecameinsightofthehouseoftheMarchHare:shethoughtitmustbetherighthouse,becausethechimneyswereshapedlikeearsandtheroofwasthatchedwithfur.Itwassolargeahouse,thatshedidnotliketogonearertillshehadnibbledsomemoreofthelefthandbitofmushroom,andraisedherselftoabouttwofeethigh:eventhenshewalkeduptowardsitrathertimidly,sayingtoherself`Supposeitshouldberavingmadafterall!IalmostwishI'dgonetoseetheHatterinstead!'

  • 8/4/2019 Alice 30

    33/65

    CHAPTERVII

    AMadTea-Party

    Therewasatablesetoutunderatreeinfrontofthehouse,andtheMarchHareandtheHatterwerehavingteaatit:aDormousewassittingbetweenthem,fastasleep,andtheothertwowereusingitasacushion,restingtheirelbowsonit,andtalkingoveritshead.`VeryuncomfortablefortheDormouse,'thoughtAlice;`only,asit'sasleep,Isupposeitdoesn'tmind.'

    Thetablewasalargeone,butthethreewereallcrowdedtogetheratonecornerofit:`Noroom!Noroom!'theycriedoutwhentheysawAlicecoming.`There'sPLENTYofroom!'saidAliceindignantly,andshesatdowninalargearm-chairatoneendofthetable.

    `Havesomewine,'theMarchHaresaidinanencouragingtone.

    Alicelookedallroundthetable,buttherewasnothingonit

    buttea.`Idon'tseeanywine,'sheremarked.

    `Thereisn'tany,'saidtheMarchHare.

    `Thenitwasn'tverycivilofyoutoofferit,'saidAliceangrily.

    `Itwasn'tverycivilofyoutositdownwithoutbeinginvited,'saidtheMarchHare.

    `Ididn'tknowitwasYOURtable,'saidAlice;`it'slaidforagreatmanymorethanthree.'

    `Yourhairwantscutting,'saidtheHatter.HehadbeenlookingatAliceforsometimewithgreatcuriosity,andthiswashisfirstspeech.

    `Youshouldlearnnottomakepersonalremarks,'Alicesaidwithsomeseverity;`it'sveryrude.'

    TheHatteropenedhiseyesverywideonhearingthis;butallheSAIDwas,`Whyisaravenlikeawriting-desk?'

    `Come,weshallhavesomefunnow!'thoughtAlice.`I'mgladthey'vebegunaskingriddles.--IbelieveIcanguessthat,'sheaddedaloud.

    `Doyoumeanthatyouthinkyoucanfindouttheanswertoit?'saidtheMarchHare.

    `Exactlyso,'saidAlice.

    `Thenyoushouldsaywhatyoumean,'theMarchHarewenton.

    `Ido,'Alicehastilyreplied;`atleast--atleastImeanwhatIsay--that'sthesamething,youknow.'

  • 8/4/2019 Alice 30

    34/65

    `Notthesamethingabit!'saidtheHatter.`Youmightjustaswellsaythat"IseewhatIeat"isthesamethingas"IeatwhatIsee"!'

    `Youmightjustaswellsay,'addedtheMarchHare,`that"IlikewhatIget"isthesamethingas"IgetwhatIlike"!'

    `Youmightjustaswellsay,'addedtheDormouse,whoseemedtobetalkinginhissleep,`that"IbreathewhenIsleep"isthesamethingas"IsleepwhenIbreathe"!'

    `ItISthesamethingwithyou,'saidtheHatter,andheretheconversationdropped,andthepartysatsilentforaminute,whileAlicethoughtoverallshecouldrememberaboutravensandwriting-desks,whichwasn'tmuch.

    TheHatterwasthefirsttobreakthesilence.`Whatdayofthemonthisit?'hesaid,turningtoAlice:hehadtakenhiswatchoutofhispocket,andwaslookingatituneasily,shakingiteverynowandthen,andholdingittohisear.

    Aliceconsideredalittle,andthensaid`Thefourth.'

    `Twodayswrong!'sighedtheHatter.`Itoldyoubutterwouldn'tsuittheworks!'headdedlookingangrilyattheMarchHare.

    `ItwastheBESTbutter,'theMarchHaremeeklyreplied.

    `Yes,butsomecrumbsmusthavegotinaswell,'theHattergrumbled:`youshouldn'thaveputitinwiththebread-knife.'

    TheMarchHaretookthewatchandlookedatitgloomily:thenhedippeditintohiscupoftea,andlookedatitagain:buthecouldthinkofnothingbettertosaythanhisfirstremark,`ItwastheBESTbutter,youknow.'

    Alicehadbeenlookingoverhisshoulderwithsomecuriosity.`Whatafunnywatch!'sheremarked.`Ittellsthedayofthemonth,anddoesn'ttellwhato'clockitis!'

    `Whyshouldit?'mutteredtheHatter.`DoesYOURwatchtellyouwhatyearitis?'

    `Ofcoursenot,'Alicerepliedveryreadily:`butthat'sbecauseitstaysthesameyearforsuchalongtimetogether.'

    `WhichisjustthecasewithMINE,'saidtheHatter.

    Alicefeltdreadfullypuzzled.TheHatter'sremarkseemedtohavenosortofmeaninginit,andyetitwascertainlyEnglish.`Idon'tquiteunderstandyou,'shesaid,aspolitelyasshecould.

    `TheDormouseisasleepagain,'saidtheHatter,andhepouredalittlehotteauponitsnose.

    TheDormouseshookitsheadimpatiently,andsaid,withoutopeningitseyes,`Ofcourse,ofcourse;justwhatIwasgoingto

  • 8/4/2019 Alice 30

    35/65

    remarkmyself.'

    `Haveyouguessedtheriddleyet?'theHattersaid,turningtoAliceagain.

    `No,Igiveitup,'Alicereplied:`what'stheanswer?'

    `Ihaven'ttheslightestidea,'saidtheHatter.

    `NorI,'saidtheMarchHare.

    Alicesighedwearily.`Ithinkyoumightdosomethingbetterwiththetime,'shesaid,`thanwasteitinaskingriddlesthathavenoanswers.'

    `IfyouknewTimeaswellasIdo,'saidtheHatter,`youwouldn'ttalkaboutwastingIT.It'sHIM.'

    `Idon'tknowwhatyoumean,'saidAlice.

    `Ofcourseyoudon't!'theHattersaid,tossinghisheadcontemptuously.`IdaresayyouneverevenspoketoTime!'

    `Perhapsnot,'Alicecautiouslyreplied:`butIknowIhaveto

    beattimewhenIlearnmusic.'

    `Ah!thataccountsforit,'saidtheHatter.`Hewon'tstandbeating.Now,ifyouonlykeptongoodtermswithhim,he'ddoalmostanythingyoulikedwiththeclock.Forinstance,supposeitwerenineo'clockinthemorning,justtimetobeginlessons:you'donlyhavetowhisperahinttoTime,androundgoestheclockinatwinkling!Half-pastone,timefordinner!'

    (`Ionlywishitwas,'theMarchHaresaidtoitselfinawhisper.)

    `Thatwouldbegrand,certainly,'saidAlicethoughtfully:

    `butthen--Ishouldn'tbehungryforit,youknow.'

    `Notatfirst,perhaps,'saidtheHatter:`butyoucouldkeepittohalf-pastoneaslongasyouliked.'

    `IsthatthewayYOUmanage?'Aliceasked.

    TheHattershookhisheadmournfully.`NotI!'hereplied.`WequarrelledlastMarch--justbeforeHEwentmad,youknow--'(pointingwithhisteaspoonattheMarchHare,)`--itwasatthegreatconcertgivenbytheQueenofHearts,andIhadtosing

    "Twinkle,twinkle,littlebat!

    HowIwonderwhatyou'reat!"

    Youknowthesong,perhaps?'

    `I'veheardsomethinglikeit,'saidAlice.

    `Itgoeson,youknow,'theHattercontinued,`inthisway:--

    "Upabovetheworldyoufly,Likeatea-trayinthesky.

  • 8/4/2019 Alice 30

    36/65

    Twinkle,twinkle--"'

    HeretheDormouseshookitself,andbegansinginginitssleep`Twinkle,twinkle,twinkle,twinkle--'andwentonsolongthattheyhadtopinchittomakeitstop.

    `Well,I'dhardlyfinishedthefirstverse,'saidtheHatter,`whentheQueenjumpedupandbawledout,"He'smurderingthetime!Offwithhishead!"'

    `Howdreadfullysavage!'exclaimedAlice.

    `Andeversincethat,'theHatterwentoninamournfultone,`hewon'tdoathingIask!It'salwayssixo'clocknow.'

    AbrightideacameintoAlice'shead.`Isthatthereasonsomanytea-thingsareputouthere?'sheasked.

    `Yes,that'sit,'saidtheHatterwithasigh:`it'salwaystea-time,andwe'venotimetowashthethingsbetweenwhiles.'

    `Thenyoukeepmovinground,Isuppose?'saidAlice.

    `Exactlyso,'saidtheHatter:`asthethingsgetusedup.'

    `Butwhathappenswhenyoucometothebeginningagain?'Aliceventuredtoask.

    `Supposewechangethesubject,'theMarchHareinterrupted,yawning.`I'mgettingtiredofthis.Ivotetheyoungladytellsusastory.'

    `I'mafraidIdon'tknowone,'saidAlice,ratheralarmedattheproposal.

    `ThentheDormouseshall!'theybothcried.`Wakeup,Dormouse!'Andtheypincheditonbothsidesatonce.

    TheDormouseslowlyopenedhiseyes.`Iwasn'tasleep,'hesaidinahoarse,feeblevoice:`Iheardeverywordyoufellowsweresaying.'

    `Tellusastory!'saidtheMarchHare.

    `Yes,pleasedo!'pleadedAlice.

    `Andbequickaboutit,'addedtheHatter,`oryou'llbeasleepagainbeforeit'sdone.'

    `Onceuponatimetherewerethreelittlesisters,'the

    Dormousebeganinagreathurry;`andtheirnameswereElsie,Lacie,andTillie;andtheylivedatthebottomofawell--'

    `Whatdidtheyliveon?'saidAlice,whoalwaystookagreatinterestinquestionsofeatinganddrinking.

    `Theylivedontreacle,'saidtheDormouse,afterthinkingaminuteortwo.

    `Theycouldn'thavedonethat,youknow,'Alicegently

  • 8/4/2019 Alice 30

    37/65

    remarked;`they'dhavebeenill.'

    `Sotheywere,'saidtheDormouse;`VERYill.'

    Alicetriedtofancytoherselfwhatsuchanextraordinarywaysoflivingwouldbelike,butitpuzzledhertoomuch,soshewenton:`Butwhydidtheyliveatthebottomofawell?'

    `Takesomemoretea,'theMarchHaresaidtoAlice,veryearnestly.

    `I'vehadnothingyet,'Alicerepliedinanoffendedtone,`soIcan'ttakemore.'

    `Youmeanyoucan'ttakeLESS,'saidtheHatter:`it'sveryeasytotakeMOREthannothing.'

    `NobodyaskedYOURopinion,'saidAlice.

    `Who'smakingpersonalremarksnow?'theHatteraskedtriumphantly.

    Alicedidnotquiteknowwhattosaytothis:soshehelpedherselftosometeaandbread-and-butter,andthenturnedtothe

    Dormouse,andrepeatedherquestion.`Whydidtheyliveatthebottomofawell?'

    TheDormouseagaintookaminuteortwotothinkaboutit,andthensaid,`Itwasatreacle-well.'

    `There'snosuchthing!'Alicewasbeginningveryangrily,buttheHatterandtheMarchHarewent`Sh!sh!'andtheDormousesulkilyremarked,`Ifyoucan'tbecivil,you'dbetterfinishthestoryforyourself.'

    `No,pleasegoon!'Alicesaidveryhumbly;`Iwon'tinterruptagain.IdaresaytheremaybeONE.'

    `One,indeed!'saidtheDormouseindignantly.However,heconsentedtogoon.`Andsothesethreelittlesisters--theywerelearningtodraw,youknow--'

    `Whatdidtheydraw?'saidAlice,quiteforgettingherpromise.

    `Treacle,'saidtheDormouse,withoutconsideringatallthistime.

    `Iwantacleancup,'interruptedtheHatter:`let'sallmoveoneplaceon.'

    Hemovedonashespoke,andtheDormousefollowedhim:theMarchHaremovedintotheDormouse'splace,andAliceratherunwillinglytooktheplaceoftheMarchHare.TheHatterwastheonlyonewhogotanyadvantagefromthechange:andAlicewasagooddealworseoffthanbefore,astheMarchHarehadjustupsetthemilk-jugintohisplate.

    AlicedidnotwishtooffendtheDormouseagain,soshebeganverycautiously:`ButIdon'tunderstand.Wheredidtheydrawthetreaclefrom?'

  • 8/4/2019 Alice 30

    38/65

    `Youcandrawwateroutofawater-well,'saidtheHatter;`soIshouldthinkyoucoulddrawtreacleoutofatreacle-well--eh,stupid?'

    `ButtheywereINthewell,'AlicesaidtotheDormouse,notchoosingtonoticethislastremark.

    `Ofcoursetheywere',saidtheDormouse;`--wellin.'

    ThisanswersoconfusedpoorAlice,thatshelettheDormousegoonforsometimewithoutinterruptingit.

    `Theywerelearningtodraw,'theDormousewenton,yawningandrubbingitseyes,foritwasgettingverysleepy;`andtheydrewallmannerofthings--everythingthatbeginswithanM--'

    `WhywithanM?'saidAlice.

    `Whynot?'saidtheMarchHare.

    Alicewassilent.

    TheDormousehadcloseditseyesbythistime,andwasgoing

    offintoadoze;but,onbeingpinchedbytheHatter,itwokeupagainwithalittleshriek,andwenton:`--thatbeginswithanM,suchasmouse-traps,andthemoon,andmemory,andmuchness--youknowyousaythingsare"muchofamuchness"--didyoueverseesuchathingasadrawingofamuchness?'

    `Really,nowyouaskme,'saidAlice,verymuchconfused,`Idon'tthink--'

    `Thenyoushouldn'ttalk,'saidtheHatter.

    ThispieceofrudenesswasmorethanAlicecouldbear:shegotupingreatdisgust,andwalkedoff;theDormousefellasleep

    instantly,andneitheroftheotherstooktheleastnoticeofhergoing,thoughshelookedbackonceortwice,halfhopingthattheywouldcallafterher:thelasttimeshesawthem,theyweretryingtoputtheDormouseintotheteapot.

    `AtanyrateI'llnevergoTHEREagain!'saidAliceasshepickedherwaythroughthewood.`It'sthestupidesttea-partyIeverwasatinallmylife!'

    Justasshesaidthis,shenoticedthatoneofthetreeshadadoorleadingrightintoit.`That'sverycurious!'shethought.`Buteverything'scurioustoday.IthinkImayaswellgoinatonce.'Andinshewent.

    Oncemoreshefoundherselfinthelonghall,andclosetothelittleglasstable.`Now,I'llmanagebetterthistime,'shesaidtoherself,andbeganbytakingthelittlegoldenkey,andunlockingthedoorthatledintothegarden.Thenshewenttoworknibblingatthemushroom(shehadkeptapieceofitinherpocket)tillshewasaboutafoothigh:thenshewalkeddownthelittlepassage:andTHEN--shefoundherselfatlastinthebeautifulgarden,amongthebrightflower-bedsandthecoolfountains.

  • 8/4/2019 Alice 30

    39/65

    CHAPTERVIII

    TheQueen'sCroquet-Ground

    Alargerose-treestoodneartheentranceofthegarden:therosesgrowingonitwerewhite,buttherewerethreegardenersatit,busilypaintingthemred.Alicethoughtthisaverycuriousthing,andshewentnearertowatchthem,andjustasshecameuptothemsheheardoneofthemsay,`Lookoutnow,Five!Don'tgosplashingpaintovermelikethat!'

    `Icouldn'thelpit,'saidFive,inasulkytone;`Sevenjoggedmyelbow.'

    OnwhichSevenlookedupandsaid,`That'sright,Five!Alwayslaytheblameonothers!'

    `YOU'Dbetternottalk!'saidFive.`IheardtheQueensayonlyyesterdayyoudeservedtobebeheaded!'

    `Whatfor?'saidtheonewhohadspokenfirst.

    `That'snoneofYOURbusiness,Two!'saidSeven.

    `Yes,itIShisbusiness!'saidFive,`andI'lltellhim--itwasforbringingthecooktulip-rootsinsteadofonions.'

    Sevenflungdownhisbrush,andhadjustbegun`Well,ofalltheunjustthings--'whenhiseyechancedtofalluponAlice,asshestoodwatchingthem,andhecheckedhimselfsuddenly:theotherslookedroundalso,andallofthembowedlow.

    `Wouldyoutellme,'saidAlice,alittletimidly,`whyyouarepaintingthoseroses?'

    FiveandSevensaidnothing,butlookedatTwo.Twobeganinalowvoice,`Whythefactis,yousee,Miss,thishereoughttohavebeenaREDrose-tree,andweputawhiteoneinbymistake;andiftheQueenwastofinditout,weshouldallhaveourheadscutoff,youknow.Soyousee,Miss,we'redoingourbest,aforeshecomes,to--'AtthismomentFive,whohadbeenanxiouslylookingacrossthegarden,calledout`TheQueen!TheQueen!'andthethreegardenersinstantlythrewthemselvesflatupontheirfaces.Therewasasoundofmanyfootsteps,andAlicelookedround,eagertoseetheQueen.

    Firstcametensoldierscarryingclubs;thesewereallshaped

    likethethreegardeners,oblongandflat,withtheirhandsandfeetatthecorners:nextthetencourtiers;thesewereornamentedalloverwithdiamonds,andwalkedtwoandtwo,asthesoldiersdid.Afterthesecametheroyalchildren;thereweretenofthem,andthelittledearscamejumpingmerrilyalonghandinhand,incouples:theywereallornamentedwithhearts.Nextcametheguests,mostlyKingsandQueens,andamongthemAlicerecognisedtheWhiteRabbit:itwastalkinginahurriednervousmanner,smilingateverythingthatwassaid,andwentbywithoutnoticingher.ThenfollowedtheKnaveofHearts,carryingthe

  • 8/4/2019 Alice 30

    40/65

    King'scrownonacrimsonvelvetcushion;and,lastofallthisgrandprocession,cameTHEKINGANDQUEENOFHEARTS.

    Alicewasratherdoubtfulwhethersheoughtnottoliedownonherfacelikethethreegardeners,butshecouldnotremembereverhavingheardofsucharuleatprocessions;`andbesides,whatwouldbetheuseofaprocession,'thoughtshe,`ifpeoplehadalltoliedownupontheirfaces,sothattheycouldn'tseeit?'Soshestoodstillwhereshewas,andwaited.

    WhentheprocessioncameoppositetoAlice,theyallstoppedandlookedather,andtheQueensaidseverely`Whoisthis?'ShesaidittotheKnaveofHearts,whoonlybowedandsmiledinreply.

    `Idiot!'saidtheQueen,tossingherheadimpatiently;and,turningtoAlice,shewenton,`What'syourname,child?'

    `MynameisAlice,sopleaseyourMajesty,'saidAliceverypolitely;butsheadded,toherself,`Why,they'reonlyapackofcards,afterall.Ineedn'tbeafraidofthem!'

    `AndwhoareTHESE?'saidtheQueen,pointingtothethreegardenerswhowerelyingroundtherosetree;for,yousee,astheywerelyingontheirfaces,andthepatternontheirbacks

    wasthesameastherestofthepack,shecouldnottellwhethertheyweregardeners,orsoldiers,orcourtiers,orthreeofherownchildren.

    `HowshouldIknow?'saidAlice,surprisedatherowncourage.`It'snobusinessofMINE.'

    TheQueenturnedcrimsonwithfury,and,afterglaringatherforamomentlikeawildbeast,screamed`Offwithherhead!Off--'

    `Nonsense!'saidAlice,veryloudlyanddecidedly,andtheQueenwassilent.

    TheKinglaidhishanduponherarm,andtimidlysaid`Consider,mydear:sheisonlyachild!'

    TheQueenturnedangrilyawayfromhim,andsaidtotheKnave`Turnthemover!'

    TheKnavedidso,verycarefully,withonefoot.

    `Getup!'saidtheQueen,inashrill,loudvoice,andthethreegardenersinstantlyjumpedup,andbeganbowingtotheKing,theQueen,theroyalchildren,andeverybodyelse.

    `Leaveoffthat!'screamedtheQueen.`Youmakemegiddy.'Andthen,turningtotherose-tree,shewenton,`WhatHAVEyoubeendoinghere?'

    `MayitpleaseyourMajesty,'saidTwo,inaveryhumbletone,goingdownononekneeashespoke,`weweretrying--'

    `Isee!'saidtheQueen,whohadmeanwhilebeenexaminingtheroses.`Offwiththeirheads!'andtheprocessionmovedon,threeofthesoldiersremainingbehindtoexecutetheunfortunate

  • 8/4/2019 Alice 30

    41/65

    gardeners,whorantoAliceforprotection.

    `Youshan'tbebeheaded!'saidAlice,andsheputthemintoalargeflower-potthatstoodnear.Thethreesoldierswanderedaboutforaminuteortwo,lookingforthem,andthenquietlymarchedoffaftertheothers.

    `Aretheirheadsoff?'shoutedtheQueen.

    `Theirheadsaregone,ifitpleaseyourMajesty!'thesoldiersshoutedinreply.

    `That'sright!'shoutedtheQueen.`Canyouplaycroquet?'

    Thesoldiersweresilent,andlookedatAlice,asthequestionwasevidentlymeantforher.

    `Yes!'shoutedAlice.

    `Comeon,then!'roaredtheQueen,andAlicejoinedtheprocession,wonderingverymuchwhatwouldhappennext.

    `It's--it'saveryfineday!'saidatimidvoiceatherside.ShewaswalkingbytheWhiteRabbit,whowaspeepinganxiously

    intoherface.

    `Very,'saidAlice:`--where'stheDuchess?'

    `Hush!Hush!'saidtheRabbitinalow,hurriedtone.Helookedanxiouslyoverhisshoulderashespoke,andthenraisedhimselfupontiptoe,puthismouthclosetoherear,andwhispered`She'sundersentenceofexecution.'

    `Whatfor?'saidAlice.

    `Didyousay"Whatapity!"?'theRabbitasked.

    `No,Ididn't,'saidAlice:`Idon'tthinkit'satallapity.Isaid"Whatfor?"'

    `SheboxedtheQueen'sears--'theRabbitbegan.Alicegavealittlescreamoflaughter.`Oh,hush!'theRabbitwhisperedinafrightenedtone.`TheQueenwillhearyou!Yousee,shecameratherlate,andtheQueensaid--'

    `Gettoyourplaces!'shoutedtheQueeninavoiceofthunder,andpeoplebeganrunningaboutinalldirections,tumblingupagainsteachother;however,theygotsettleddowninaminuteortwo,andthegamebegan.Alicethoughtshehadneverseensuchacuriouscroquet-groundinherlife;itwasallridgesand

    furrows;theballswerelivehedgehogs,themalletsliveflamingoes,andthesoldiershadtodoublethemselvesupandtostandontheirhandsandfeet,tomakethearches.

    ThechiefdifficultyAlicefoundatfirstwasinmanagingherflamingo:shesucceededingettingitsbodytuckedaway,comfortablyenough,underherarm,withitslegshangingdown,butgenerally,justasshehadgotitsnecknicelystraightenedout,andwasgoingtogivethehedgehogablowwithitshead,itWOULDtwistitselfroundandlookupinherface,withsucha

  • 8/4/2019 Alice 30

    42/65

    puzzledexpressionthatshecouldnothelpburstingoutlaughing:andwhenshehadgotitsheaddown,andwasgoingtobeginagain,itwasveryprovokingtofindthatthehedgehoghadunrolleditself,andwasintheactofcrawlingaway:besidesallthis,therewasgenerallyaridgeorfurrowinthewaywherevershewantedtosendthehedgehogto,and,asthedoubled-upsoldierswerealwaysgettingupandwalkingofftootherpartsoftheground,Alicesooncametotheconclusionthatitwasaverydifficultgameindeed.

    Theplayersallplayedatoncewithoutwaitingforturns,quarrellingallthewhile,andfightingforthehedgehogs;andinaveryshorttimetheQueenwasinafuriouspassion,andwentstampingabout,andshouting`Offwithhishead!'or`Offwithherhead!'aboutonceinaminute.

    Alicebegantofeelveryuneasy:tobesure,shehadnotasyethadanydisputewiththeQueen,butsheknewthatitmighthappenanyminute,`andthen,'thoughtshe,`whatwouldbecomeofme?They'redreadfullyfondofbeheadingpeoplehere;thegreatwonderis,thatthere'sanyoneleftalive!'

    Shewaslookingaboutforsomewayofescape,andwonderingwhethershecouldgetawaywithoutbeingseen,whenshenoticeda

    curiousappearanceintheair:itpuzzledherverymuchatfirst,but,afterwatchingitaminuteortwo,shemadeitouttobeagrin,andshesaidtoherself`It'stheCheshireCat:nowIshallhavesomebodytotalkto.'

    `Howareyougettingon?'saidtheCat,assoonastherewasmouthenoughforittospeakwith.

    Alicewaitedtilltheeyesappeared,andthennodded.`It'snousespeakingtoit,'shethought,`tillitsearshavecome,oratleastoneofthem.'Inanotherminutethewholeheadappeared,andthenAliceputdownherflamingo,andbegananaccount