AIKIN AMARIYA

Aisha Mijindadi

by

B.A Accounting :Ahmadu Bello University MA Mass Communication : University of Leicester, UKDipl. Counselling : Stonebridge Colleges, UK Dipl. Learning & Development : CIPD, UKPRINCE2 Project Management: Digital Bridge

She hopes that DWM will be widely accepted by Muslim teens and women and, this small effort will assist her and the young of this Ummah to develop the love to strive for the Hereafter.

Primary Mover - DWM.

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Discussions:

Preparations

D Day

The Morning / Night Before

The day after

Sisters’ Night

Mothers’ Morning

A story surmisisng the paper:

Ikenna and Nike

FinancialThe waitThe Contract Part 1The choiceThe in-lawsThe Father-in lawLife at homeThe Contract Part 2

AIKIN NO 1:

Your Knight in Shining Armour…

Him

What’s wrong with

Who is he

Where is he?You

Relax, he’s a ‘human’, there’s nothing to fix.

Be Supportive, make demands short and sweet.

Stick to budgets

AIKIN NO 1:

Your Knight in Shining Armour…

Solutions:

AIKIN NO 1:

Your Knight in Shining Armour…

Solutions:

Develop a habit of gratitude, from the small things…

Pamper him,…you’ll reap the rewards eventually.

Console him with your wealth

AIKIN NO 2: Your Loved Ones…

What happened to ‘U r a married woman now…?’

Alhamdullilah….here come the white lies..Who to trust? My advice, not family, ...not yet

AIKIN NO 2: Ibn Abbas Narrates…

The Prophet (PBUH) continued: "After Ishmael's mother had died, Abraham came after Ishmael's marriage in order to see his family that he had left before but he did not find Ishmael there. When he asked Ishmael's wife about him, she replied: "He has gone in search of livelihood." Then he asked her about their way of living and their condition, and she replied, "We are living in misery; we are living in hardship and destitution,' complaining to him. He said: "When your husband returns, convey my salutations to him and tell him to change the threshold of the gate (of his house).’

Shhh!!!

AIKIN NO 2: Ibn Abbas Narrates…

Then Abraham stayed away from them for a period as long as Allah wished and called on them again but did not find Ishmael. So he came to Ishmael's wife and asked her about Ishmael. She said: 'he has gone in search of our livelihood.' Abraham asked her; 'how are you getting on?' asking her about their sustenance and living. she replied: 'we are prosperous and well off (we have everything in abundance).' then she thanked Allah. Abraham said: 'What kind of food do you eat?' she said: 'meat.' he said: 'what do you drink?' she said: 'water.' he said: 'O Allah! bless their meat and water.""The Prophet (PBUH) continued: "Then Abraham said to Ishmael's wife: 'When your husband comes give my regards to him and tell him that he should keep firm the threshold of his gate.'

Shhh!!!

AIKIN NO 2: Your Loved Ones…Solutions:

Keep shut….your family don’t need to know

If you do, your husband and eventually you, loose ALL respect in their eyes.

Make out time for them, visit with your husband in-tow, and help them create a relationship that has nothing to do with you.

Handle the jealousy with care…Fathers can be the worst.

AIKIN NO 2: Your Loved Ones…Solutions:

AIKIN NO 3: The Dreaded In-law (s)

Here come the hateful, dreaded sisters, brothers & Mothers !!!Take over your home

Spoil your children

Spend your hubby’s money…..etc etc

AIKIN NO 3: The Dreaded In-lawSolutions:

Don’t act out the stories

Expect nothing

Treat even better than your family

Patience…..Loads

AIKIN NO 4: Taking OWNERSHIP of the MARRAIGE Project:

SABR…

Sacrifice

Learn how to communicate with him.Peer Pressure …Your friend’s marraige is not your marraige!

AIKIN NO 4: Taking OWNERSHIP of the MARRAIGE Project:

Do not be passive (liability or non contributor)Do not be over agressive (nagging, controlling)

Find a middle course

Loose yourself and find yourself….

AIKIN NO 1: Most people get married, believing a myth that

marriage is

a beautiful box full of all the things they have

longed for:

companionship, intimacy, friendship, etc.

The truth is that marriage at the start is an

empty box. You must put something in before

you can take anything out. There is no love in

marriage.

Love is in people, and people put love in

marriage. There is no romance

In marriage. You have to infuse it in your

marriage.

A couple must learn the art and form the habit

of giving, loving, serving, praising, keeping the

box full.

If you take out more than you put in, the box

will be empty.

SUMMARY: For you and your knight in shining armour…

Be best friends

COMMUNICATION

Discover new things together

Encourage, Inspire and Intrigue each other

Forgive and….forget?

COMPROMISE

SUMMARY: For you and your knight in shining armour…

Keep each other’s secrets

Marvel at each others talents

Nurture each others souls

Overcome problems together

LOVE THOSE HE LOVES

SUMMARY: For you and your knight in shining armour…

Remember the little things

Respect budgets

Value even the smallest things….show gratitude

… and lastly…

SUMMARY: For you and your knight in shining armour…

Abu Hurairah (May Allah be pleased with him) reported: Messenger of Allah (sallallaahu ’alayhi wa sallam) said, "When a man calls his wife to his bed, and she does not respond and he (the husband) spends the night angry with her, the angels curse her until morning". --- [Al-Bukhari and Muslim].

ZZZZZZ in each others arms…..no matter what

There will be times you will wish you had

remained single, when you will ask yourself,

‘What was I thinking when I married him?’ 

When you feel divorce is the only option,

feel betrayed and beyond recovery…U R NOT ALONE!!!

KNOW…..

KNOW…..

Every Marraige has its fair share of difficult moments, BOTH of you are experiencing these perplexing momentsRemember, its the rough surfaces that sharpen the best, Rough times are meant to build your marraige not break it.Difficult seasons are temporary, straight roads don’t make experienced drivers,KEEP ON MOVING!!!

KNOW…..

KNOW…..

The Ultimate goal is Al jannah regardless of the path being smooth or rough. The one who sees it this way, will have no regrets; heads a win, tails a win.

May Allah continiously bless our abodes!