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TURN FEAR TO YOUR ADVANTAGE RELATIONSHIPS

Turn Fear To Your Advantage

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Have you ever realized, that fear could be your best ally? Learn how to work with fear and turn it into one of your strongest tools for success.

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Page 1: Turn Fear To Your Advantage

 

 TURN FEAR TO YOUR ADVANTAGE

RELATIONSHIPS

Page 2: Turn Fear To Your Advantage

Turn Fear To Your Advantage 

Barbara is a manager at a direct mail company that has seen

business decline in favor of internet marketing. She is

concerned about her job because the company may have to

close, and she worries about her future since direct mail is all

she has ever known.

In these uncertain times, she will not be able to walk into

another job and she feels fearful. As a result, her thoughts

can't keep quiet; "How am I going to survive?" "What will

happen to me if I lose my job?" "Where will I end up?"

Barbara's anxiety was so overwhelming it took on a life of its

own.

Most of us have experienced the paralyzing effects of fear. Now, with increased global insecurity and economic downturns, fear threatens to permeate further and deeper into our daily lives. What can we do to cope?

Contrary to common belief, fear is more than a useless,

unpleasant emotion. According to the Toltec approach to life, it

is a vital life force that can be used, controlled and channeled

constructively. In the end, we can do more with fear than

merely "handle it." With the right attitude, we can use fear to

constructively bring about positive growth and change in our

lives.

Fear Is Natural

The first thing to accept is that fear is a natural part of life.

Fear is so basic it runs not just through human emotions but

Page 3: Turn Fear To Your Advantage

the entire animal kingdom. Therefore, we need to consider

that if fear is so pervasive, it must have a purpose.

Every aspect of life has a positive use — even those things we

do not enjoy. Fear has a positive use arising from its origins as

a natural instinct for self-preservation. This can also be seen in

animal behavior. When frightened, animals tend to run away

or fight for survival, especially when cornered.

Like most animals, our Sympathetic Nervous System is

concerned with many of our responses, especially with the

Flight, Fright or Fight response. When we encounter a

particularly stressful event, the Sympathetic Nervous System

prepares our bodies to meet the crisis.

When the event is over, our bodies are supposed to return to

normal, so that we can move on. However, in practice, things

do not always turn out this way. This is usually because we fail

to take immediate action to internally resolve the stressful

situation — either out of choice or through circumstance.

So, what happens is that we perpetuate fear and stress by

worrying about the stressful event or consequences that

followed — playing out different scenarios in our minds --

increasing stress and becoming more and more debilitated.

Detach, Gain Clarity, Take Action

To avoid becoming paralyzed by fear, it is important to

recognize that fear acts as a support mechanism to focus our

attention on immediate challenges at hand.

Yet, although intense focus is useful when dealing with

pressing danger, it does not help in situations that require

Page 4: Turn Fear To Your Advantage

objectivity and a clear strategy. In these cases, you may not

need to fight for your life — it may be more appropriate to be

able to step back and assess the situation carefully.

When you detach and gain clarity, you can recognize your

fear's origins and you can determine whether there is any valid

basis for your fear. Then you can objectively plan your next

moves. If someone is about to attack you, your fear is about

the need to save yourself. But, if your fear is that you will not

survive without your present job, you will quite quickly be able

to see that this fear has no solid foundation, and is simply

based in the mind.

To detach and gain clarity from fear, here are some questions

to ask: "Why do I feel afraid?" "Are there other reasons I am

not acknowledging?" "Is there a factual basis for my reasons?"

"How can I get a better, more objective picture of the true

situation and my fears?"

The next step is to take action. It is tempting to wait until you

have all questions answered before embarking on a course of

action. However, when we are dealing with a life crisis, events

move quickly and procrastination means that we can end up

being overtaken by our fear.

Taking action dispels fear since it confirms to us that we can

cope with the situation. Taking action generates a momentum

of its own. And, allied with the sense of inner confidence that

action facilitates, taking action can open new opportunities,

while keeping fear at bay.

Using Fear To Your Advantage

Once we are equipped to handle and control fear, we can start

Page 5: Turn Fear To Your Advantage

using it to our advantage.

In its positive sense, fear can drive us; it can spur us to

become bigger and better, wiser and more tolerant, more

awake and therefore more responsive. In particular, once we

learn to place fear into its proper perspective, we can use it as

a useful and positive catalyst for change.

Fear hits us mostly as a result of a major crisis in our lives,

whether through an accident, a traumatic illness or a sudden

job loss. Such a crisis will often signify a big turning point.

How we respond to the crisis will influence whether this

turning point will turn out to be a tragedy, a nightmare or a

triumphant statement of our human spirit.

Many have used the traumatic experience of losing their job as

a springboard into a brand-new and successful career.

Although their initial experience was filled with fear, they

focused on the opportunities that they could gain, took the risk

of branching into unknown and new fields, and just kept going.

We can see how this works by imagining a job interview. By

using fear positively, interviewees can keep sharp and alert to

every opportunity that presents itself. If the interview

becomes challenging, for example, they will not panic, but will

be wide awake and quick to respond.

Fear is natural, but we should not allow it overwhelm us. By learning to handle our fear and by using it to look for opportunities, we can take the same gap that other successful people have also taken in their lives. It all depends on our ability to channel this vital force constructively, and turn it to our advantage. 

 

 

Page 6: Turn Fear To Your Advantage

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For more information about Théun Mares describing the Toltec Teachings, please visit www.toltec-legacy.com