Testdrive your Dreamjob

PARISin

A Step to step Guide to Paris in the footsteps of Julie & Julia and Midnight in Paris for Finding and Creating the Work You Love

Travel in a worldcity and meet your heroes and heroineswho earn their money doing what they love.

They will inspire you to create your own legend.

From Paris with love

Peter de Kuster

Founder of The Heroʼs Journey

with Rachelle Wessels

Testdrive your Dreamjob1Learn more about your Dreamjob before changing your career with

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Testdrive your Dreamjob1Yes, you can try your hand at the career of your dreams without risking your present job, your next mortgage payment or your kids’ future.

In Testdrive Your Dreamjob in Paris, one of the exciting The Hero’s Journey travel guides, you’ll discover how a Testdrive in Your Dreamjob – meeting rolemodels in the exciting city of Paris who actually work in the profession you’ve always wanted or want to be excellent in – can be the first step toward making that dream come true.

Experience your ownDream...

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Testdriveyourdream

Revolutionary and practical, this hands-on journey in Paris from the founder of The Hero’s Journey will help you mesh your working life better with your deepest sense of yourself as you learn how to:

• Plan a Testdrive in Your Dreamjob of your own in any career.• Build the skills and gather the knowledge you’ll need to embark on your new career.• Learn to be excellent in your present career by meeting the best in your profession and improve rapidly through their wisdom.• Start a new career in the second half of your life. To create work and a live you are passionate about and never want to retire from.• Overcome the fear of changing careers.• Turn a layoff, transformation of your business or other involuntary career change into the opportunity of a lifetime.• Design and create a Dreamjob that doesn’t exist... yet.• Manage a smooth, safe transition from your present job to your Dreamjob.• Minimize financial risk as you embark on your bold new life.

in Parisget out and

Travel through Paris

Don’t be stuck

The start of your journey in the Rodin Museum

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The start of your journey in the Rodin Museum

2It is a fact that most people hate their jobs. It feels sometimes like the Gates of Hell from Dante in the Rodin Museum.They would rather be doing something else – anything else. It doesn’t have to be that way.What if I told you that you would never have to work another day in your life? Would you be interested? When you find the right fit in a career, it no longer feels like work. You wake up every day excited about how you earn your living. This per-fect harmonizing of your talents, skills , personality and work style creates a passion and a desire as well as a feeling of contentment that is worth more than gold.It can all be yours, if you make the Testdrive your Dreamjob in Paris and apply its principles. Finding contentment in your career is a lot like looking for a hidden treasure.

You know – if you’re considering a Dreamjob – that the push toward a dream career is not just about how you spend your working hours. It’s about having work that matches your values, that feeds instead of exhausts you, that doesn’t require you to leave your priorities at home and leave your heart at the door.

The Rodin Museum. A great place to start getting a new perspective on your life and your Dreamjob.When we imagine a Dreamjob, we imagine a job in which we are fully ourselves, in which are hearts and minds are equally engaged. This engagement is what people feel in the Rodin Museum looking at the work and life of Rodin. This is what they feel while making their Testdrive in their Dreamjob. And once they reconnect with the deepest sense of self, few are willing to return to their status quo.

Using a map, you embark on a journey, an adventure in search of yourself. The point is that there isn’t a rational ‘best’ solution waiting for you. The Testdrive your Dreamjob, the pursuit of the treasure is the reward. The hidden treasure is your passion. Because, when it comes to a Dreamjob, there is no fixed job. It is all a search. Enjoying the search is what success is all about.

Our hero from Midnight in Paris meets his first ‘guide’ in search for his calling in a tour in the Rodin Museum. He is contemplating his life.

Through the centuries and generations people have made Testdrives in their Dream Jobs in Paris. For architects, artists, writers, designers, cooks, actors is Paris a place for professional inspiration. Almost every one of them has come away invigorated, and more determined than ever to make his or her Dreamjob happen. After years of fantasy, something about living the job for just a few days (or midnights) empowe-red them to take action. Partly it was the learning – the concrete knowledge they gained about their desired business. Partly it was the mentor who held their hand, boosted their confidence and offered ongoing help.

In search for your passion. In your Dreamjob. In your life.Partly it was the contacts they made, which made taking the next steps easier. But above and beyond those practical things, there was something else: the Testdrive Your Dreamjob awakened and energized something deep inside them. It connec-ted them with the truest part of themselves, a part that had previously felt dormant and that, once awakened refused to be ignored.

Our hero in Midnight in Paris is finally able to tell his story.

your DreamjobStory

Write...

The Rodin Museum. A great place to start

getting a new perspectiveon your life

and jour Dreamjob.

What is a Dreamjob for You?

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What is a Dreamjob for You?

3You know - if you’re considering a Dreamjob – that the push toward a dream career is not just about how you spend your working hours. It’s about meshing your work life with your deepest sense of yourself. It’s about having work that matches your values, that feeds insteads of exhausts you, that doesn’t require you to leave your priorities at home and check your heart at the door. When we imagine a Dreamjob, we imagine a job where we are fully ourselves, in which our hearts and minds are equally engaged. This engagement is what people feel on a Testdrive Your Dreamjob. And once they reconnect with that deepest sense of self, few are willing to return to the status quo.

Les Deux Magots: one of the places from which Julia Child made her discovery journey of Paris and undertook her Testdrive Your Dream Job.

But most people take it more slow. They continue working in their current jobs while transitioning gradually into the dream. They do research, they write a business story, they figure out how to begin their new career without taking on more risk than they can handle. Some go to school to get more training.

Some dedicate a period of time to paying off debt and building savings so they’ll have funds for their new careers. Some find work in the new field while they put to-gether a business of their own. The path and the timeline vary from person to per-son; what they all have in common, though, is the passion and the inspiring story to move ahead.

Your Dreamjob is where your heart is.

Of course, after a Testdrive Your Dreamjob, some people find that the job they tried was not the job they thought they wanted. Finding that you don’t love your Dreamjob as much as you’d hoped can be disappointing; the dream is crashed, the ‘what next?’ question is alarmingly reopened. But even people who have that experience usually consider their testdrive a success; they’re thankful that it sho-wed them what they didn’t want before they ventured further.

For most people – whether or not they find their Dreamjob the journey is like ope-ning the door to a long – closed room.

Which of course brings up the next question; what happens after the Testdrive in Your Dreamjob? You go; you fall in love with a career; you leave fired up to work in your chosen field...and then what? Sure, you had a great couple of days, weeks, months; sure, you know what you want to do – but there’s a whole other story between wanting and making it happen. And when you look at that story it’s full of house payments, car payments, bills for the kids, food bills, health care, ... How exactly do you take the next step?

It took a while before Julia searched for her Dreamjob in the direction of her passion for “French Food”. She discovered this in small (jolly) steps.

The question is its own answer. You take the next step. The next small step. The big-gest surprise for people who find or create their Dreamjob is that it doesn’t have to happen all at once. It doesn’t have to be an all-or-nothing leap from security in the unknown.

Instead, it can be a series of small steps that you take only when you feel ready. Sure, there are the few really bold (or independently wealthy) Dreamjob Hunters who cut the ties to their previous careers and hurl themselves full-time into new ones.

Step in Julia’s footsteps

Recreate your life

Visit Les Deux Magots

Be inspired by new people

Feel the cityvibe!

Renew your identity

Discover the power of rolemodels

Have a lifechanging experience

Sunlight and fresh air touch something that has long been in the dark, and the result is a renewed sense of self and a new sense of possibility. Testdriving your Dreamjob will be fun (it is a vacation after all); it may be exhausting (people tend to work hard at the jobs they love); it will be exhilarating to spend time with some-one who works at his or her passion. And it will probably leave you changed.

So don’t make a Testdrive Your Dream Job if you’re afraid of sparking something passionate inside you. Do it only if you’re ready to be renewed.

The quote from Julia Child “Bon Appetit” who became famous as the culinarywriter who made the french kitchen accesible for the American audience.

But it started with her “Testdrive your Dreamjob”.

What new world lies

behind these doors?

Why travelling with Rolemodels? A walk along the Seine

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Why travelling with Rolemodels? A walk along the Seine

4This travelguide through Paris will tell you how to create a Testrive in Your Dreamjob by creating your own Midnight in Paris. It will tell you how to choose a mentor; how to prepare yourself to the Testdrive and, most important of all, what to do when the Testdrive is over.

This Travelguide will explain the little steps you can take from where you are now, to where you want to be. Along the way you will meet lots of people - heroes and heroines form present and past - who have done it. They, and many others, will tell you about the fears and challenges, the mistakes and the lucky break throughs, the surprises and accomplishments they exprerienced while travelling in their Dreamjobs.

There’s very little in our sociaty that encourages us to know what we really want to do. When we were children, people asked us what we would want to be ones we were older. But ones we were teanagers we were told what to be.

We are canalised into a limited range op careers based on security and stability rather than passion. The notion of following our hearts when it comes to jobs, is well trained out of our system by the time we leave high school. So who can blame us for the fact that, by the time our practical jobs no longer fulfill us, we forgot about how to find our passions inside for a long time already?

There could be another reason to consider a Testdrive in Your Dreamjob. It enables you to experiment. To test all sorts of jobs that seem appealing. You could be able to get a Dreamjob and be ignorant about it, unless trying one or two.

Are your blanc on your passion?Find it while making a Testdrive in your Dreamjob...

You will find out that these heroes and heroines don’t see themselves as risk-takers. Afterwards, many of them are surprised they have taken such a courageous ac-tion. But after years of working in a job that didn’t feed their passions, they felt like they no longer had a choise: they had to go past their fears and make a switch. ‘I came to a point in which I could no longer live with myself by not trying’, they say. ‘Failing while trying, would at least let me know I tried.’ Not trying at all would have been the failure.

What did help out heroes and heroines was realizing that the risks they had to take weren’t that overwhelming. The most scary moments - quitting their jobs, buying real estate, sign for a loan, the moving - all came when they where far ahead in their planning, or even after their new career was already on track. It was still scary; it was still a risk; but it was a calculated risk.

The very moment they took the risk, they felt they were most likely to succeed.

What if you don’t have a clue on what your Dreamjob is? What if you’re bored and unsatisfied in your current job, but when you think of what now you’re completely blanc? Well, then you’re not alone.

Overcoming your fears; Julia Child at Le Cordon Bleu

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Overcoming your fears; Julia Child at Le Cordon Bleu

5This travel guide of Paris will tell you how to make a Testdrive in Your Dreamjob. Ten years ago, when I read about people who made their money doing what they love, I tought; ‘that’s great but how do I make this happen for me?”

I was impassioned by my idea – but too scared to do anything about it. Perhaps that’s how you’re feeling now. I know that what I needed more than anything then was help getting past my fear.

I needed someone to tell me that;

• Going after my Dreamjob didn’t require the daredevil leap that I thought it did;

• What it did require was a series of small, incremental steps; and

• Those steps could be fun rather than scary

Take small steps, just like Julia did. And remember; have fun!

What changed was something inside the people. They had crossed a line. They had moved from a place where they were making rational arguments for not pur-suing their dream to making an emotional choice to do so. And once that line was crossed, there was no turning back. So what gets us to that line?

If you, too, are wishing for your dream job but are immobilized with fear; how can you get to that line yourself? Let’s take a moment to look at your nemesis, fear. When it comes to fear, we are little better than rats.

Brain research shows that we are wired to instant gratification over long term gain. Much as we want our Dreamjobs, our brain circuitry pushes us to stay with the se-cure jobs and situations we already have.

In other words, now we want our steady paycheck and benefits; in the future we’ll risk pursuing the job of our dreams. And as if our own physiology weren’t obstacle enough, there are plenty of other factors that encourage us to stay where we are.

Money, family, loss of identity, fear of exposing the “real you”, the “fraud factor” (that voice in our heads that says “you mean you really think you can succeed at that?”) are all steely, gripped forces that work to keep us where we are.

But they don’t always keep us where we are. Despite the fact that everyone faces those hurdles, some people manage to surmount them and move forward toward their dreams.

If someone had told me these things back then I might have been skeptical – but I also might have been willing to give it a try. I might have started my Testdrive my Dreamjob years sooner.

You are probably skeptical too. The idea of giving up the security of a “real” job – with a real paycheck and real benefits – is pretty scary no matter how you cut it, and imagining even the most exciting Dreamjob doesn’t do much to mitigate that fear.

The only way to do that is to address those fears head-on. So let’s do that right now – because the sooner you get mobilized, step by incremental step, the sooner you’ll make that Dreamjob real.

In the years since I started with The Hero’s Journey (my Dreamjob) I’ve talked to many people who gave up “security” to start their dream jobs, and I’ve discover-ed that most people had an experience similar to mine. They spent years thinking about making the switch before finally taking action. Like me, they had found their fear insurmountable.

They had a million reasons for not doing it: kids in school, mortgages and tuitions to pay, an impending promotion, not the right time...

Every reason was completely legitimate, but somehow, at a certain point, those reasons ceased to matter. Sometimes the reasons actually went away (the kids graduated, the mortgage got paid off), but just as often the underlying situations didn’t change.

One solution is to precommit , that is, to take an action that requires you to make that more difficult choice now.

Precommitment is also an excellent strategy for circumventing fear. Book directly a Testdrive Your Dreamjob before you can talk yourself out of it. A precommitment to something that feels scary. That way, when the time comes, when your brain’s limbic system urges you to put off the Testdrive your Dreamjob, you would no lon-ger have the option.

Throughout the Dreamjob process there are many ways you can precommit to cir-cumvent your fear: schedule a Testdrive your Dreamjob three months in the future because that far away it won’t seem so scary: register now even though it won’t start until the fall (same reason); commit to a bank loan or a lease, or a business partner even if those actions scare you silly.

People with nothing in the bank quit their jobs and open successful businesses.

Sole earners with families to support move cross country to work at starting wages in their career of choice. People who have spent years building respect and cre-dentials in their profession leave it all and go back to square in another. And peop-le who are terrified to expose the dream they’ve sheltered inside for decades, manage to give up the career that was “expected” and take up a very different kind of work they love.

How do they do it? What enables them to put aside their fear and take the risk?Behavioral economists, who look at how people make choices are well aware of the fact that we tend to choose the thing that feels most desirable in the present, and postpone a harder or riskier choice to the future.

Fortunately, they’ve also noted ways for people to work around this.

Dear Hero(in) Conquer your fear!You can do it...

Whatever you imagine the right personality type to be, I am sure you’re going on such a succesful Testdrive your Dreamjob that will turn the stereotype on its head. But that’s not to say that successful Dreamjob seekers don’t have anything in com-mon. They do. The more people I talk to, the more I see certain stories that most of them share.

Regardless of their proclivity toward risk, or their life of assertiveness they have simi-lar stories about life and themselves that make it easier for them to proceed.

Whatever you imagine the right personality type to be,

I am sure you are going on a successful Testdrive your Dreamjob

that will turn the stereotype on its head.

~

Don’t commit if on every level you question the decision but do commit if in your heart you know your course is right and it’s only fear that is making you hesitate.

Often when I describe the process of Dreamjob seeking, people will say “Well, I couldn’t do that because I’m not the right kind of entrepreneurial person” as if there were a certain personality type that is capable of making the switch. I know what they mean. They have the idea that the type of person who can successfully pursue a Dreamjob is someone who is exceptionally gutsy (or perhaps foolhardy); is very decisive and assertive; has a high tolerance for risk and ambiguity; and has a history of creating opportunities and trying new things.

I suppose if I hadn’t seen so many different types of people successfully create their Dreamjobs, I would assume the same thing, but I’ve known enough heroes and heroines in the past and present to know that isn’t so.

People who create their Dreamjob seem to come in all personality configurations; some are so assertive that they resemble bulldogs, while others seem very timid. Some have a history of starting new ventures and others have worked entire ca-reers in the same job. Some rattle off decisions with heroic force; others deliberate until the last possible moment – and then change their minds!

Not everyone who makes the switch has every one of these stories, but the people who successfully undertake dream careers seem to have most of them. Together, these stories make a legendary package that seems to make it easier for people to move out of their comfort zone and try something new.

But even these attributes don’t fully explain why some people switch and others don’t. Something is still missing from the equation. And that missing something, I be-lieve, is queesting. People who make the switch have reached a point in their lives at which they simply have no choice. The call for a quest is reached. It is no longer a matter of wanting to make a change. They have to.

I’m the perfect example. How many years did I stay with a job for which I really had no passion? How many exit opportunities I let pass by before a nearly death expe-rience was the push I needed?

1 A Clear StorySuccessful heroes and heroines in a Dreamjob have a clear story of what they want to do. It may be a particular job, it may be a lifestyle and a location (I want to work in Italy). Though the level of specifity varies for every person; they share a clear mental story of themselves doing that work. The clarity of their story acts like a magnet pulling them forward. When they meet obstacles along the way that magnetic story tallies them and keeps them moving toward it.

2 OptimismIn addition to having a clear story, successful heroes and heroines believe that their vision will become reality. Otherwise, they wouldn’t do it! Some have a gene-ral confidence in their own abilities based on a history of success; others believe that this particular venture is primed to success. They know that failure is possible (and occasionally can‘t stop fear from creeping in) but most of the time they anti-cipate success as if that were the far more likely option.

3 Comfortable with failureWhen they do consider failure they don’t become terrified. Their story is “What’s the worse that can happen? Whatever it is, we’ll deal with it”. They imagine a period of difficulty and adjustment after the failure, and then life will move forward positively once again.

4 Heroism Over and over, in different words successful heroes and heroines express the same story. ‘I would rather try and fail than knowing I didn’t try.” “I would be so disap-pointed in myself later if I hadn’t given it a try.” It is a recurring story: what pushes them past the fear, is the knowledge that by not trying they will be letting themsel-ves down.

Now, on your way to work you find yourself dreaming of ways to overcome them. Instead of wishing there was a way that you could move forward with the dream, you find yourself thinking about how you’re going to do it. Instead of imagining some vague, open ended timeline you start fixing your actions to concrete dates when you know you will be able to act. An enormous internal shift has taken pla-ce, and now even major fears such as money, family, identity, and exposing the ‘real you’ begin to lose their insurmountable quality. As if a Jaguar has begun rol-ling inside you, from that moment on, you steadily gather momentum.

It took me so long because all those years, unhappy as I was my fear was greater than my unhappiness.

But then suddenly something switched when I divorced one day and nearly died three days later due to a almost anyeurism. That constellation of events pushed me over the line to a point where the unhappiness fear equation inverted; to a place where my unhappiness became greater than my fear. And in that moment my desire – no, my need – to pursue my dream became unshakable. Even the financial crises could deter me.

This is exactly what I’ve learned in the stories of heroes and heroines from the past and present in Paris. Eventually the pain of not acting outweighs our fear of ma-king a change. It simply becomes too uncomfortable to stay. That is the point at which we accept the risk of change.

And that is a magic moment – because the moment we cross that line, things that previously felt like insurmountable fears begin to look more like manageable hurdles.

The power of your story; in Hotel Le Bristol

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The power of your story; in Hotel Le Bristol

6Now you can focus your story on your Dreamjob.

Instead of planning some vague timelines, you can concentrate on data when you will be able to act. An enormous internal journey has taken place, and even important fears as money and family begin to lose their invincibility.

You’ve started a ‘Midnight in Paris’ story inside you, and from that moment on, you will get more and more momentum. By daring yourself to step into something new, you will enlarge your capacity to grow. Again, another argument to aspire to your Dreamjob.

Hotel Le Bristol. It was here that our hero could no longer deny his passion: becoming a writer.

Many of the heroes and heroines who took one of these paths to their Dreamjob, will tell you they never thought that they would make obe of these transitions to fund their dreams. But when they came to a point where their pain of staying, be-came bigger than their fear of moving forward, they were more willing and more creative. That was the moment they started living up to their dream.

Some are lucky: their partner chares their dream. For many people in a relation-ship, it’s not that easy. Family prevents you from pursuing your dream. Your child-ren, or partner, could be unwilling to move, while your Dreamjob requires you to move to another location.

The inlaws don’t make it easy on our hero in Midnight in Paris. There could be pa-rents who need your support, who don’t leave you energy, time and money to undertake your new business. There could be a partner who is not willing to take a financial risk, or family members who don’t support your desire for change.

Some of these obstacles can be overcome with a little patience and creativity. Sometimes, postponing your dream for a fixed period of time, will buy you time to do the necessary research and planning.

For many, maybe most people, this is a big fear. There are bills to be paid. Children and parents to look after, medical expences to think of, saving something for a rainy day.

You can’t just pack your bags and chase after a dream that is financially insecure. It’s totally not practical, and this alone is reason enough to keep being stuck in traffic, while Dreamjob fantasies are running through your head. However, there are ways to fund the transition to your Dreamjob:

•Working parttime in your Dreamjob, to fund the transition to your Dreamjob career.

•Keep working fulltime in your current job, and start building your Dreamjob on the side.

•One of both partners is keepng his, or her job, while the other one is starting the new business full time.

•Selling your house, and temporarely living with friends or family untill your new business starts being profitable.

For how many years have you been working in your job? How many years have you spend on gaining expertise, respect of your colleagues, confidence, building contacts and building trust? In short, how long have you been busy building an identity based on your work? Why would you be willing to give that all up? And start all over again as a freshman? Not so weird we refuse to strive after our Dream-jobs. It challenges us in who we are.

Untill that day it starts feeling uncomfortable. One day our current work will be so conflicting with our new story, we start to have a feeling inside of living the ‘nine-to-five’ lie. This is the point we start taking our Dreamjob seriously.

Your ‘Real Story’. Here’s one of the cruelest ironies of striving after your Dreamjob. On one hand, we feel forced to find our Dreamjob, simply because our current job doesn’t feel in lign with our true story. On the other hand we feel paralysed thinking of that new job.

Not so strange we reufuse to chase after our Dreamjobs.

It challenges our feeling of who we are.

Some of these obstacles can be overcome with a little patience and creativity. Sometimes, postponing your dream for a fixed period of time, will buy you time to do the necessary research and planning. Sometimes, adjusting your dream enables you to make it more achievable. Sometimes, changing your job will tell your family how serious you are on your dreams, and it will disprove their objections. For others, solving the conflict between their relationship and their dream, won’t be that easy to do. It could point out to be an invincible conflict. The proces of striving after our Dreamjob awakens a deep feeling whitin ourselves, that sometimes doesn’t fit with our existing relationships.

Sometimes heroes and heroines, just awaken, come to the conclusion that they do expact more out of a relationship than they can get. Or that they would like to have a different relationship than the one they are currently in. They feel like this new per-son in an old outfit, of which the shoulders and the length don’t fit anymore. It’s no surprise tensions will rise. Through conversations the hero or heroin and theirs partner can change their relationship in a way that the ‘new story’ will have room for deve-lopment, as will have the partner. I can’t advise you on what to do when you’re in a conflict with your partner about you striving for your Dreamjob.

All I can do is to ask you the following:

What calling can be found in the deepest part of you? Does your partner understand how important this is to you?

How can you be authentic? What’s your story?

Most of the time, an undefinable superficial fear is the mask behind the deeper fear of your survival. It’s growing out of proportion in the darkest part of you. Once we bring these fears to the surface and examine them with common sence, two things will happen: First of all, your fear will shrink into a more realistic proportion (you will see you’re going to survive, this is only about money). And however mo-ney and survival seem to be linked closely, in real life, they are two different things.Second, you can put your realistic fear of loosing your money, into a rational per-spective. What if you will loose your money?How will you handle the situation? Maybe you will live with relatives for a while. Eventually you will find a new job. Maybe your fears are not about money, they are about family. Are you affraid to upset your partner? Or abandon your family? Or yourselves in case of faillure?Whatever your fears are, exaggerate them to the most irrational end: maybe your loveones will lose their respect for you. Maybe they will leave you. Maybe you will end up old, sick and alone. Allow yourself to feel the deep emotion associated with these scenarios. Yes, this can hurt for a cuple of minutes, but when the fierce emotion is over, you will see there’s a rational path beyond these catastrophes. The fears will lose the grip on your life, making it easier to move on.

Talking about your fears also helps to minimize their power. Often we unintentio-nally reinforce our fears by keeping them inside of us, where they can prosper in the dark. When we talk about them, we open up. This helps putting them into a more rational perspective. Another way of rationalising your fear is by being con-fronted with it in smaller pieces, so your tolerance will grow in time. Just like lear-ning to drive a car; making small testdrives. Step by step. This same step-by-step approach can be used to minimize your fear of transforming your current job into your Dreamjob.

The first small step is to Testdrive your Dreamjob. It’s fun, without any risk, like driving whitout the danger. When Testdriving your Dreamjob is boosting your confidence, you can go onto the next step; maybe another Testdrive; maybe further investiga-tion in your Dreamjob career; maybe a seminar on how to start a business.

Transforming your current job into your dreamjob can be cut into small pieces that will please you, and can be spread out over a period of time.

What if I go after my ‘real story’ and I don’t like it? What if I tell my ‘real story’ to the world, and other people don’t approve? What if my ‘real story’ requires me to do things that don’t match with my current life? Or, most scary of them all, what if I go after my ‘real story’ and fail? No matter how much we’re longing inside to be authentic, to be ourselves, showing our story, and acting to it, can feel like a really scary movie.

There are a million reasons why not to go for your Dreamjob! They are all rational. When it comes to the crunch, or when fear of change meets the pain of being stuck, deciding to go after your Dreamjob will be emotional.

All the rational reasons in the world seem to disappear, ones you reached the point you know you need to act.

How to reach this point? Aha! This will be different for every person. Talking to people who done it will help a lot: they’ll prove it can be done. A Testdrive in your Dreamjob will help: it’s a painless way to build your confidence and trust.

But most important is what you can do to face your fear, and to get past it. So, when fear of change petrifies you, discover your fear. Find out what it is exactly that you are most affraid of. Are you affraid of loosing all your money? Exaggerate this fear way beyond proportion. Will you lose your house? Will you have to live with your family? Will you get sick and be poor once you get old?

When you won’t come to this point, when you want to know more and more, and inspite of an overkill on information, you won’t shop for a mentor, something else is the matter. You will probably be scared.

Explore the deepest of your fear. This will liberate you to move on. Or maybe your resistance will give you another message. Maybe the career you’re considering is not your dream career. This can cause its own form of freeze. How can you walk away from this path after all the effort you invested? What will your friends, family and partners think after all you’ve told them? And if this is not your Dreamjob, what IS?

Knowing what to do with our lives is giving us a confortable feeling, knowing what the next chapter will have in mind for us. Letting go of this comfort can be more scary than not having a dream at all. It’s not surprising that we stun when, after doing research, our dream career is not our dream career at all.

If this is the case, try to relax and accept. Another dream will come by, just as this one did, but it can’t come by untill you let go of the old one. In fact, the fact that you had this dream, will perfectly enable you to find the next one. You already did all the hard work to let go of the status quo. You already had the courage to share your dream and ask for help. You got effective in researching your dream. Who told you that your first dream has to be THE dream? Looking for your dream is a journey. It’s not a straight line. It’s not leftbrain. It’s a path with circles moving forwards and back. Left and right, exploring options. It’s not your goal to have a particular job or profession. It’s all about finding out who you are, and what kind of job will connect with the deepest feeling inside you.

I would like to tell you, that ones conquered your fear, it’s never about to return. But unfortunately, it isn’t so. Fear can be headstrong. It will always return. Whene-ver the little voice inside your head is spreading doubt.

You gather courage, you decide to do a Testdrive and yes, there it is again when you’re gathering courage to call your possible mentor. (what if she laughs at me, what if he hangs up the phone?)

When your mentor agrees and your Testdrive is planned, fear will come again when it’s time to show up at work. (What if they don’t like me, what if I make a fool out of myself?) The truth is, fear will be your temporarily travelling compagnion for the whole of the proces. But then again, that’s the keyword: temporarily. It will come and go, and every time you will be able to manage it better. Graduately you’ll find yourself to have a track record in conquering fear. Reaching that point will make you less vulnerable to your own fear. You can look at it as a milestone, because every fear you conquer on your journey will bring you closer and closer to your dream.

How will you know, it’s the right timing for you to Testdrive your Dreamjob? There’s not a fixed rule on this one. Some people whil keep on looking around, and won’t be satisfied until they have closets full of information and securities. Others will jump in and get their hands dirty in a Testdrive. Both ways are fine. You will do more research after your Testdrive. For now, it’s time to quit ones you’ve learned enough and can’t wait to take the next step; making contact with your potential mentors.

How to contact your mentor? A taxiride in the night through Paris

7

Why are busy entrepreneurs so willing to help strangers going into their business?Why are they willing to take time of from their job? To reveal the secrets of their business? To train their potential competitor?

They do this for several reasons:

•They love doing what they do, and to share it with others (don’t you get energie out of talking about things you love, especially with people who also love it?)

•They will give something in return for all the help they got while starting themselves.

•They are willing to give to others what they didn’t get, to save others from making the mistakes they made.

•They love the energy a new passionate person brings.

•They enjoy teaching and the pride coming from being asked for advice.

•They believe in their profession and want to see the branch grow.

•They are reminded of the fact that they are having a Dreamjob themselves, and appreciate what they’ve learned and accomplished.

How to contact your mentor? A taxiride in the night through Paris

7

* ConnectionOf most importance. Find someone you connect with. This will enable you to ask questions, be honest with, share your exitement and fears, feel comfortable and have fun. In short, you’re looking for someone who makes you feel at home. When having the choice between a very experienced but detached mentor, and a less experienced mentor who treats you as a friend, choose the second option. You can always make a second testdrive with a more experienced mentor later on. Make sure your testdrive will be as comfortable and fun as possible.

The best way to start making contact with your mentor is an e-mail. Sending an e-mail will give your potential mentor the opportunity to digest the concept of mentorship without having to give a response directly. It will also make your follow-up phonecall a whole lot easier. The mentor knows why you’re calling. Your intro-duction e-mail: short, to the point and respectful are the qualities that will help you getting a response to your mail.

•Keep it short: the less your prospect has to read, the more he or she absorbs.

•Are clear in your questions: I would like to lean by your side on a moment that suits you.

•Make it personal: explain why you chose him or her above all others.

•Let your personality ad passion shine through: show your prospect why he or she would want to work with you.

So there are mentors willing to work with you. How will you find one? Searching on the internet, or talking to friends and relations, you will stumble on people who could be your mentor. The trick is to find out who of these persons will be the right mentor for you. The process of selecting a mentor is a mutual interview. The men-tor will check you out to find out what kind of person you are and whether you are someone they want to spent time with and at the same time you make sure he or she will be able to give you what you need. Here are a couple of things to pay attention to:

* PassionIt’s most important to look for people who are passionate about their jobs. When you’re meeting people to talk to them, look and listen to signals that show they genuinely love what they do. You don’t want to learn from someone who’s bored or worn out.

* ExpertiseLook for the experts in the field. Maybe you heard about someone with a great reputation. Ask people how they think about your potential mentor.

* Teaching abilityLook for good teachers. It’s not enough to be an expert in the field; your mentor has to pass on the knowledge to you.

* Success If possible, choose someone who is working in your Dreamjob for at least five years. By that time the mentor will have overcome most bugs, will have shown the power that’s needed to survive and prosper and will have a long term perspective to pass on.

Dear Mentor

Write your next chapter

Your questions/ lines:

You will test your mentor in the same way he or she will be testing you. These are things you should be willing to ask:

•Do you love what you’re doing? (just because your mentor is working in the field, doesn’t mean it’s their Dreamjob, so check it out).

•What’s driving you? What give’s you energie every morning?

•Would you have time to spend with me when I came over (or would you redirect me to someone else)?

•What are the things you can imagine us working on together?

•Would I be able to...? (Fill in whatever you would like to see or do).

•Are there other people in your staff with who I could spent time?

•Have you ever been a mentor or something similar?

It’s not likely you get the chance to ask all these questions, but being prepared will increase the value of the information you get.

You can have more than one mentor.

Your questions for your mentor; Gertrude Steins salon

8When you found your first mentor, and you’ve taken your Testdrive, you can de-cide there are things you would like to learn or experience with someone else. A second mentor in the same field can give you another perspective on your Dreamjob, and give you a chance to bring to practice what you’ve already learnt.

A mentor in a related profession can give you an experience which is complemen-tary on what you’ve already done. Most of the heroes and heroines who have ever worked with a mentor began the relation with an open mind on advice, en-couragement and maybe a few new contacts and sometimes they got so much more out of it: long term business partnerships. Whether it’s about formal or infor-mal working relationships, ad hoc arrangements, both mentors and heroes and heroines stayed in relationships that had advantages for both of them.

Your questions for your mentor; Gertrude Steins salon

8Here are some of the things you would want to ask your mentor.Your own list will grow while preparing for your visit:

•What skills do I need to be succesful in this profession?

•You’ve talked to me and see me work; do you think I’ve got what it takes to be good enough and succeed? (how difficult it is to ask this, ask your mentor to be honest. There’s no point in putting all of your energy, heart and soul into something that’s not right for you. Although, you’re the only one to decide to do so or not).

•Time. How many hours a day do you work? Has this changed compared to the beginning?

•How do you balance your profession with your private life?

•How much would it cost to get the right education?

•What does it cost to find your place in this Dreamjob?

•Could you advice me on how to get a loan and work with bankers?

•What are the biggest expences? The most inpredictable ones? The most hard to monitor?

•Which expences can I skip, and which ones are inevitable while starting up?

•What can I expect to earn in the beginning? And later on?

•How long did it take you to reach your break even point? And making profit?

•What where you biggest mistakes when it comes to money?

•What did help you in maximizing your profit and minimizing your costs?

•Would you be willing to show me your business plan? Your yearbudget?

•What do I have to know on instruments, buying, suppliers, location, technical processes?

•What would I absolutely need to do?

•What should I absolutely not do?

•Which other questions should I be asking you?

•How did you end up in this profession?

•What can you imagine for me?

•What are the next steps I would have to take to move forward?

•Do you have any contacts who could help me?

•Are there other people you would recommend me to talk to?

• Are there organisations in this profession I should join? (or stay away from?)

Don’t forget, your Tesdrive in your Dreamjob is a ‘quest’. So, ask the right ‘quest-ions’!!

Gertrude Stein gives our hero an honest and direct feedback on his life and work as a writer.

•What sort of training would you advice?

• How do you attracks customers? What does work? What doesn’t?

•How do you determine your prices?

•What where your biggest mistakes?

•What where your biggests successes?

•What where your biggest surprises?

•What was the hardest time for you?

•What is the most difficult for you on a ongoing basis?

•What would you do different when starting all over today?

•What is the biggest obstacle you think you’re going to face?

Gertude Stein is the ‘mentor’ of Picasso when it comes to marketing and sales. Later on he got briljant at this. Our hero in Midnight in Paris can learn quite some thing from her when it comes to earning your money as a writer.