Nancy Kramer's commencement speech to Wellington's Class of 2009
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The Wellington School Commencement Speech “Hear your Heart” 06.12.09 Let me simply begin by acknowledging everyone who made this day possible. The parents, siblings, family and friends, fabulous faculty, staff, the board, and Rob, and finally the class of 2009—what a wonderful day for us all. As the largest class of lifers in the history of the school, I’ve had the great fortune of knowing many of you for a very long time. I’ve always believed this class to be an incredibly spirited group with great chemistry. I am honored to be standing here this afternoon. When Rob first asked me to speak, I have to say, I was really hesitant. First, as a parent of a graduate, I didn’t want to embarrass my daughter, or get too emotional, or add more stress to an already stressful week! And second, I wondered what I could possibly share that would be memorable to these kids I love and adore? In fact, as I was thinking about what I might talk about, I was trying to remember my own high school graduation. I couldn’t remember much; I don’t remember who spoke, or what was said. I asked a bunch of other people, and they couldn’t remember much about their high school graduations either. So I thought ‘Whew—at least the pressure is off! Whatever I do, no one will remember it anyway.’
Nancy Kramer's commencement speech to Wellington's Class of 2009
Nancy Kramer delivers the commencement speech to The Wellington School's Class of 2009
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1. The Wellington School
Commencement Speech
Hear your Heart
06.12.09
Let me simply begin by acknowledging everyone who made this day
possible. The parents, siblings, family and friends, fabulous
faculty, staff, the board, and Rob, and finally the class of
2009what a wonderful day for us all.
As the largest class of lifers in the history of the school, Ive
had the great fortune of knowing many of you for a very long time.
Ive always believed this class to be an incredibly spirited group
with great chemistry. I am honored to be standing here this
afternoon. When Rob first asked me to speak, I have to say, I was
really hesitant. First, as a parent of a graduate, I didnt want to
embarrass my daughter, or get too emotional, or add more stress to
an already stressful week! And second, I wondered what I could
possibly share that would be memorable to these kids I love and
adore?
In fact, as I was thinking about what I might talk about, I was
trying to remember my own high school graduation. I couldnt
remember much; I dont remember who spoke, or what was said. I asked
a bunch of other people, and they couldnt remember much about their
high school graduations either. So I thought Whewat least the
pressure is off! Whatever I do, no one will remember it
anyway.
Still, while I may not remember what was said at my graduation, I
DO remember how I was feeling. I was anxious to move on, yet
nervous about the future. Like a lot of teenagers, I lacked
confidence. This was partially due to the fact that while growing
up, I was repeatedly called stupid by my older brother. My own
mother used to call me her dumb blonde. Instead of ignoring them, I
believed them. I felt unsure of myself; I felt fat, clumsy,
uncoordinated and stupid. I had come to public school after
attending Catholic school, so I felt like an outsider. And even
though I was involved in lots of high school extracurricular
activities from the drill team and student council to the yearbook
and newspaper staff, I never really felt like I fit in. Maybe it
had something to do with the fact that while serving on the dress
code committee for student council I voted against kids wearing
BLUE JEANS to school; maybe it was that! Not a great way to fit in
and make friends. Okay, well, thats a whole other story!
So when graduation time came, I was feeling ready to get on with my
life, ready to start fresh. As Im sure many of you are too. Today
marks a very important moment in your life. Yes, its the end of
high school, the end of your time at Wellington. But perhaps more
importantly its also the beginning. The beginning of the next phase
of your life, when you learn so so much more about yourself.
With that as the backdrop, I decided that there was really only one
message I wanted to share with you today. Theres one thing Ive
learned from my own experiences that brings the most joy and
fulfillment to my lifeand that is, when I have the courage to make
choices, make decisions that follow not my head, but MY
HEART.
It sounds incredibly simplistic, but as we get older, our inner
voice seems to fade, and the beating of our heart is overcome by
the noise of our head. When the happy-go-lucky version of each of
you entered kindergarten at Wellington or elsewhere, you made
choices instinctively; you didnt over-think things. Its part of the
magic of being a child. By the time we hit middle school, then
upper school, we become more influenced by peers, and the shoulda,
coulda, wouldas of our life. Its easy to loose track of
yourself.
And now, as you enter this next, even more independent phase of
your lives, youll be faced with all sorts of NEW choices, from
choosing classes and a major, to how much you party and who you
hang out with. The choices you make begin to define you as an
adult. Some of your decisions may have lifelong impact. Which
brings me back to my point. When I have had the courage to follow
my instincts, follow my heart, and make decisions without the
shoulda coulda wouldas in my head, I feel so much more joyful and
happy.
So today I want to share four things Ive learned to do that help ME
listen to my heart: I try new things; I observe others that I
admire and respect; I choose environments where I get to be myself;
and finally, I work to find a time and place to reflect. I have
found that when I engage in one or more of these, I have a much
easier time to connecting to my heart and my true self.
The first thing Ive learned to do is try new things!
Now is the perfect time for you to experiment! Meet new people;
take classes that seem completely ridiculous! When I was in
college, I took Swahili as my foreign language requirement.
Everyone thought I was crazy! But I had had a passion for Africa
ever since Id been a ten-year-old girl pouring through books about
Africa at the local library. The animals, the people and the
location captivated me probably because it was so new and different
than my own life! After I graduated from college, I planned and
paid for my own trip Kenya, which had been one of my dreams. To
this day, the photographs I took on that trip hang on the walls of
my office as a reminder of who I amand what I am capable of
doingwhen I listen to my heart.
When I was 26, I started my own business. And my first client was
also 26. His name was Steve Jobs and he was the founder of a
three-year-old company called Apple Computer. I remember a story
Steve told about how he went to calligraphy class at Reed College.
The calligraphy class had no practical application in Steves life,
but when the Macintosh was introduced years later, it was that
class that inspired the elegant type style for the computer. Had he
not taken that class, we all may still be using computers with
really bad typefaces and your SIP projects may not have looked as
wonderful!
Learning what our heart is telling us is a bit of trial and error.
Thats why Ive found trying new things helps me hear myself more
clearly.
Second, observe others.
Take in the qualities of others you admire and find inspirational.
For me, I have always found books, especially biographies, to be
inspirational in helping me figure out myself, what things resonate
with me and make my heart sing. I think Ive gravitated to books
more for this inspiration because in the absence of pictures, I
visualize myself as part of the character. When I was younger, I
read Nancy Drew and Little Women; as Ive gotten older, I have been
drawn to stories about strong women like Hillary Clinton, or the
great Washington Post publisher Katherine Graham, or my very
favorite role model, Jane Goodall, the female scientist who spent
decades studying chimpanzees in Africa. Maybe it was the connection
to Africa that first drew me to Jane, but the more I learned about
Dr. Goodall, the more I was drawn to her strength, her
independence, her ability to forge new ground. When I finally had
the chance to meet her recently, guess how she inscribed her book
to me? Nancy: hear your heart. Warmly, Jane As you learn about
others you respect, notice what things you admire, and take those
things with you. Oh, and Jane Goodall? Shes a blonde.
Third, I choose environments where I get to be myself.
One of the beauties of Wellington is that students are encouraged
to choose schools where they feel comfortable, seem drawn to. As
youve made your way through that process, I imagine youve had a
variety of people telling you that you have to apply to a certain
place or you should go to a particular school. I hope you were able
to make the best choice for YOU. And if you happen to find yourself
in a place where you dont feel yourself, I hope you find the
courage to make a change. After all, its not prison; its college,
and its a choice.
For me, creating a work environment where people can be themselves
has been one of my proudest accomplishments. I completely and
totally believe that in order for a company to succeed, people
first need to feel safe and secure to speak their mind and be
themselves. Our company is populated with writers, designers, art
directors, technology developersfolks that put
themselvesliterallyinto their work. Creating an authentic, genuine
environment that nurtures creativity is paramount. I was recently
speaking at an MBA class at OSUs Fisher College, and one of the
students asked me how I manage creative people. I laughed and said
theres no such thing. Who am I to manage creative people? Im there
to inspire, to encourage new thinking, and to motivate. I do that
by trying to help them tap into their inner child, that voice that
is unfiltered and unencumbered. I do it by instigating a giant Nerf
gun war at the office, crawling around on the floor, trying to stay
out of the line of fire, and laughing so hard with everyone that my
sides hurt. Or by unexpectedly toilet papering the office or
surprising everyone with Jungle Breakfast! So as you move through
your life, either find or create environments where you get to be
you!
And finally, find a time and a place for quiet reflection.
Find your groove, your place, your time, your activity that makes
your heart sing, ideas flow, and gives you great confidence. Maybe
its when you are out running, or listening to certain music, or
skiing down a mountain, or being close to or far away from your
family.
For me, finding time to reflect is a work in progress. I havent
mastered the art of meditation or personal journal writing. My
reflection times come sporadically. They come when Im in an
airplane, at 35,000 feet, flying back to Ohio from California, or
when Im talking to my best friend or watching the horizon at the
ocean or breathing in mountain air. Those are times when I
experience an Ah Ha moment, as Oprah calls them. For me, this is
something I will continue to practice for the rest of my life. And
perhaps the reason Im such a firm believer in the Wellington
message of lifelong learning.
So my wish for you all is that you TRY new things, DISCOVER people
who inspire you, FIND environments that unleash you, and MAKE real
time for self-reflection. As Steve Jobs said in his 2005 Stanford
commencement address, " Don't let the noise of others' opinions
drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the
courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already
know what you truly want to become."
The great news is, Wellington has already given each of you a head
start on listening to your heart. As I was reminded yet again at
the Senior Dinner Wednesday night, the secret sauce of Wellington
is the community and family atmosphere. All of our grades, under
one roofwith lower schoolers interacting daily with the high
schoolers and all the grades in between. Some of you refer to it as
the Wellington bubble, a nirvana-like environment that is insulated
from all the ills of the world. And to a certain extent that is
true because it is like a family. Still, even when the real world
intrudes and individual students or staff face personal struggles,
or even painful losses, we respond by reaching out and holding on
to each otherjust like a family. Our schools intimate environment
is designed to help you feel safe. Safe to be yourself, safe to
explore your passions. Because we believe that when students feel
safe, you soar. Its the primary reason my children are here, and I
would imagine, a big reason why your parents chose Wellington for
you.
As you move beyond Wellington today, I wish you all the courage,
the comfort, and the consciousness to listen to your heart.
Each one of you is special.
Youve already proven it here at Wellington.
Youve performed on the Royal Mile at the Fringe Festival in
Scotland.
Youve faced and overcome public and private personal
challenges.
Youve served as ambassadors in France, Italy, Chile and
Mexico.
Youve taken Wellington spirit and sideline cheerleading to a whole
new and sometimes questionable level.
Youve tried out for the solo performance, even though you were
scared.
Youve been accepted to play athletics at the highest college
level.
Youve written, produced and directed your very own
performances.
Youve contributed thousands of hours to our community through
dozens of services projects.
Youve uncovered your true talent and passions.
Youve been welcomed into over 130 colleges and universities.
YOU are Wellington.
WE are Wellington.
On behalf of your parents, the faculty, staff, friends, the board
of trustees, as well as all those who love you yet are unable to be
with us today, we are so very proud of each of you. We look forward
to watching you and sharing with you this wonderful journey called
life.
Congratulations!