Change and Resilience not a Jane Austen Novel

– but a guide to coping with career change

Alan Foum

February 2017

First Surviving then Thriving in a Changing Situation

• Leaving one’s old job in an involuntary way is a tough experience

• Acknowledge what has been lost – professional bereavement• Status – Am I my Job?

• Income – how will I pay the bills?

• Community and friendships with colleagues

• Routine and structure

• Long term plans based on old career

• Identity eggs in the work basket

• Develop a way to move on to a better future• This is the end of a job – not your life

• A new chapter begins

• Navigate the tricky journey between the two• A need to plan and execute a path

• Ability to cope with challenges along the way

The Kubler-Ross Grief Curve

Shock

Denial

Anger

Bargaining

Depression

Realisation

Acceptance

Adjustment & New Beginnings

Standard explanation of coping with a change in your circumstancesWe all however go through this in our own different ways

Time

Stages of Grief - Shock

• Being told that you no longer have a job is painful• Even when anticipated – writing on the wall• Worse if out of the blue• Feelings of numbness• Urge to do something – run around like

headless chicken• Fear of how will I cope

• Need to try to calm down (not an easy thing to do)

• Try to prepare for it – if you see signs that something bad is likely to happen

• Take a bit of time out if you can – when it does

Stages of Grief -Denial

• We all heard the jokes about the big river in Egypt

• BUT – Denial is real• Need to face truth of the situation

• Need to understand in order to move on to the next stage

• A large blow to self - esteem

• Need to tell facts to friends and family –yes this is scary but we need to do this

• Change social media profiles –professional society profiles etc.

• Create a new professional profile• Self employed / consultant etc.

• Show that you are looking for a new role

• Business cards. Linked in etc.

Stages of Grief - Anger

• Anger at the situation is a natural response

• What has happened is not fair – you did not deserved this

• What has happened is not nice

• BUT – deserved has nothing to do with this (Clint Eastwood)

• It is not personal – even if it feels so

• But need to manage anger in order not to damage people and things that are important to us

• Angry actions can have long term consequences

• Burning bridges is a bit of a bad idea

Stages of Grief – Bargaining / Pleading

• This is a stage many of us go through• Could I have done anything different?

• Is there anything I can do to change things?

• Why me and not them ?

• Is there an alternative?

• Need to understand that this is happening and cannot be stopped

• But – opportunity to get better terms (if possible)

• Make sure that all procedures are followed and know and safeguard your rights

Managing the Exit

• Need to leave with head held high – this is not easy

• Leaving day is an emotional day

• Comply with any severance agreement (confidentiality etc.)

• Hand over work in good way

• Get all relevant paper work (P45 etc.)

• Don’t look back in anger or try not to

Loss of Workplace Identity

• The loss of the workplace identity is one of the hardest things to bear –particularly for long serving employees

• We would spend on average 36% of our waking hours at work

• Work colleagues can become close friends• We share we share coffee breaks and lunch, discuss all manner of things, share

confidences, laugh and may have worked together for many years

• We can get defined by or jobs• By our job title

• By our team

• By our projects

• Even by our office location / desk

• This has now gone

• We need to build a new identity in order to move on to a better place

Stages of Grief – The low times

• What has happened will have an effect on all people

• Everybody will feel down for a time, good days and bad days

• Small things can set you off

• There will be setbacks

• Your behaviour may affect the people around you

• Learn to Mourn – acknowledge what is happening

• You will need to work out a way of coping positively

• We all have our own ways of doing this

• Find people to talk to – get support

• Physical or mental activity to achieve something positive

• Try to take time out

• Most people will be sympathetic to some extent

Stages of Grief – Realisation

• Realisation is not Resignation

• This is acknowledgment of the current situation and the need to change it

• The last chapter has closed – it is not coming back

• A new chapter is opening – but it is a blank page and I am a little nervous

• I need to develop a plan but don’t know where to start – confusion and a bit of anxiety

• Get help and advice – begin to develop a plan

• Get your brochure (CV and social media profile) updated

• Begin to actively network

Positioning Statements

• A positioning statement or tell me about yourself (TMAY)• Who you are?

• What key skills do you have?

• Where have you worked?

• Biggest achievements?

• Summarise what do you have to offer?

• Exit statement – why did you leave your last job?• This is a key question at any interview and needs a positive and clear answer

• Only give this if asked

• Do not slag off your past employer – it looks bad

• Offer statement• What are you looking for – staff role, contract work, consultancy?

Positioning Statementsmy personal example

• Positioning Statement

• I am a geophysicist with extensive experience gained at BG Group, a major oil & gas company. I have a record of delivering geological guidance on complex projects to tight deadlines across the full spectrum of E&P from basin scale exploration to brown field development, including new ventures acquisitions and disposals. I have delivered projects worldwide in both operated and Joint Venture settings, having planned and executed over 40 wells. Having worked successfully in multi discipline teams, I have a thorough understanding of all aspects of the E&P industry, including geology, reservoir modelling, petroleum engineering and economics. I have taught internal courses on both technical and non technical subjects. My greatest achievement was the integration of BG India where I trained up and mentored a highly successful sub-surface team. I have a strong commitment to HSSE. I am a fluent Russian speaker with technical translation experience.

• Exit Statement

• Following the takeover of BG Group by Royal Dutch Shell and subsequent closure of the Reading office my position was made redundant in October 2016

• Offer Statement

• I am available for staff roles or temporary contract assignments and look forward to delivering for your organisation

Stages of Grief – Acceptance

• Acceptance is not Resignation

• Begin to feel more confident

• Regaining and retaining self belief

• Capable of coping with the setbacks that will inevitably come

• But relishing each success however small

• Fully developed brochure and sales pitch

• Growing mutually supporting network

• Confidence to approach people with a proposition

• Supporting fellow job seekers

Interviews

• An interview is a two way discussion

The hiring organisation needs an employee and the candidate needs a job

• What are interviewers looking for?• Can you do the job effectively?

• Can you demonstrate the skills which you say you have?

• Will you be able to fit into our organisation ?

• Do you have the capacity and flexibility to grow and develop?

• Are there any gaps, inconsistencies or red flags?

• What do you need to know?• Is this place right for me?

• Is the job as advertised ?

• Will this job give me what I need / want?

• How will I fit in here?

• Are there any red flags for me?

Interviews - Preparation

• Research the role and organisation• Prepare a crib sheet if necessary

• Study job description in detail

• Work out answers to likely key questions and practice them

• Deliver a consistent, coherent and positive message

• Prepare a set of questions that you need to have answers for

• Engage positively with all people who you contact

• Arrive early to easy own nerves

• Try to be calm

• The more you practice the better you get

Dealing with – no thanks

• The majority of the time you will be declined

• This is not pleasant and repeated rejections can get you down

• The reasons could be :• There was a more suitable candidate

• You were not the right fit for the role

• You were not the right fit for the organisation

• All sorts of intangible reasons

• A few people provide feedback but most won't

• Need to dust yourself down and move on to the next opportunity

• Need to learn from any personal mistakes in the application. but don’t dwell on them

• Somebody will say yes please eventually

Robert the Bruce and the Spider

• In the middle ages, during the Scottish war of independence, King Robert the Bruce was on the run from the English after being defeated

• As he hid in a cave on Rathlin Island, dejected and thinking of escaping into exile he watched a spider build a web

• The spider kept falling, but each time it got up and started building the web again until it finished

• Robert realised that the spider did not give up despite repeated setbacks, but picked itself up and eventually succeeded

• Robert went back and rallied his troops and eventually freed Scotland by winning the battle of Bannockburn

Networking –Key to getting the hidden openings

• About 80 % of job openings are not advertised but are accessed through a network

• Opportunities at:• Conferences & events

• Professional bodies

• Through former colleagues, customers, suppliers and other associates

• Social gatherings, clubs societies, religious groups, schools

• Online world

• Need to• Get circulating = professional exposure

• Have a clear message

• Have something to offer

• Be prepared for setbacks

Adjustment and New Beginnings

• You are now at a more peaceful place

• You have a sense of purpose, confidence and self belief

• You can deal with the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune

• You can and do achieve

• You have plenty to offer the world and the world accepts

• It is morning again

• Sounds great doesn’t it

Keep Climbing and Look After Each Other