Body Language Part 3

A firm handshake is the most acceptable handshake for business.

A dominant handshake is used to try to control the other person

A limp/dead-fish handshake is not well regarded in Western business dealings

In a politician’s handshake, one person clasps the other person’s hand with both hands

A flick away handshake is firm but the hand is pushed away at the end.

Dominant handshake: Person A holds Person B’s shoulder while shaking hands

Dominant handshake: Person A holds Person B’s elbow while shaking hands

Dominant handshake: Person A holds Person B’s wrist while shaking hands

• There are some signals that we use openly to express negativity, knowing that the other person will understand immediately what we mean.

• There are cultural variations, but the following are common in Western culture.

A head shake is the common signal for ‘NO’

The thumbs-down signal means that something isn’t good

Fist shaking is a sign of aggression

A fist supporting the head is a sign of boredom

Repeated gestures such as thumb twiddling indicate boredom.

Hair twirling is another sign of boredom.

The listener is feeling negative. She has her hand under her chin with the index finger pointing upwards and thumb supporting the chin.

The fig-leaf pose is a defensive or anxious gesture.

The head cradle reveals a need for self-comfort

• A lie is something that creates a false impression.

• Lying is something everyone does.• It has proved that it is part of our everyday

lives- we lie in 1/3rd of our interactions with others each day.

• Lying is complex but, as ever, the body tells the truth, even if words are seeking to spin a different surface story.

Look for clusters of gestures to indicate deceit, such as a finger covering(guarding) the mouth.

Another form of mouth guard is holding the hands in front of the mouth.

Rubbing the eye can mean that you are lying or that you sense the other person is lying.

Touching the nose, a signal of lying, may occur once or several times during a conversation.

Rubbing your ear may mean that you have heard enough of someone’s lies.

Scratching your neck means you are not sure that you agree.

Pulling your collar indicates that you feel uncomfortable about something.

Putting a pen in your mouth shows that you may be under pressure.

Some liars make more eye contact than normal. They stare into your eyes to stress their honesty, as they know people expect liars not to be able to look them in the face.

The shrug may be a conscious effort to deceive.

• We talk about carrying an ‘aura of power’.

• In fact, there are a number of aspects to the physical behavior of such people that tell us that they are dominant.

This man, leaning back in his chair with his feet on the desk, is showing that he owns the territory around him.

A dominant handshake establishes the powerful person’s advantage.

Dominant smiles are tight-lipped .

• People skills are key in workplace.• How you communicate with the people

around you, how you form relationships with them and how you motivate and influence them are vital to success in your career.

• These skills can only be fully realized if you have the ability to read and use body language in context.

Always dress appropriately for the job.

A confident presenter has an open and relaxed stance.

An unconfident presenter will look tense and have a tight posture.

Where you sit at a table may make the difference as to how others at a meeting perceive you.

If everyone seated at a round table is of equal status, they are likely to feel relaxed.

A relaxed presenter means that the customers are engaged and interested.

The closed body language displayed here means the customers are no longer in rapport.

This interviewee dips her head and looks overanxious as she enters the interview room.

This interviewee is fiddling, which makes her look nervous.

This woman looks relaxed and is making a good impression.

The Six Secrets of Attractive Body Language

• Face: Have an animated face and make smiling a part of your regular repertoire. Make sure you flash your teeth.

• Gestures: Be expressive but don’t overdo it. Keep your fingers closed when you gesture, your hands below chin level and avoid arm or feet crossing.

• Head Movement: Use triple nods when talking and head tilt when listening. Keep your chin up.

• Eye contact: Give the amount of eye contact that makes everyone feel comfortable. Unless looking at others is a cultural no-no, lookers gain more credibility than non-lookers.

• Postures: Lean forward when listening, stand straight when speaking.

• Territory: Stand as close as you feel comfortable. If the other person moves back’ don’t step forward again.

• Mirror: Subtly mirror the body language of others.