It’s Not Only What You Say, But How You Say It

IT’S NOT ONLY WHAT YOU SAY, BUT HOW YOU SAY ITAppreciative Advising & Nonverbal Communication

ARIN ELY,Supervisor of

Enrollment and Academic Advising

Hello. Thanks for joining us this morning.

JOYA KONIECZNY, Supervisor of

Undergraduate Academic Advising

Now it’s your turn.

I. Overview of Nonverbal Communication

II. Advising Theory III. Implementation & Examples

What to expect:

PERCEPTIONS: WHAT DO YOU SEE?

NONVERBAL COMMUNICATIONSpoken Word

Voice38%Body

Lan-guage55%

NONVERBAL COMMUNICATION

Nonverbal Communicati

Nonverbal Communication

Appearance & Adornment

Use of Space (Proxemics)

Touch (Haptics)

Eye Contact & Facial

ExpressionsVocalics

Body Language (Kinesics)

Environment & Artifacts

Use of Time (Chronemics)

Touch (Haptics)

ExpressionsVocalics

Touch (Haptics)

ExpressionsVocalics

Touch (Haptics)

ExpressionsVocalics

Touch (Haptics)

ExpressionsVocalics

Touch (Haptics)

ExpressionsVocalics

Touch (Haptics)

ExpressionsVocalics

Touch (Haptics)

ExpressionsVocalics

Touch (Haptics)

ExpressionsVocalics

Touch (Haptics)

ExpressionsVocalics

Word Choice

& Langua

ge Device

MIRROR ACTIVITY

SOCIAL CONSTRUCTIVISM People working together to construct

meaning Filters we choose to place over our

realities When information comes into contact

with existing knowledge / experiences

Appreciative Advising (AA) is a social-constructivist advising philosophy

APPRECIATIVE ADVISING: 6 PHASES

1DISARM

DISARM

Chronemics (are you on time for the appointment?)

Proxemics (do you stand at the doorway or go up to the student to greet them?)

DISARM Appearance & Adornment

(what you’re wearing says a lot about you)

“Who you are speaks so loudly I can’t hear what

you’re saying.”- Ralph Waldo Emerson

DISARM Appearance & Adornment

Attention Advisors:Your boss notices how you

dress too!

DISARM Facial Expressions & Eye Contact Kinesics (body language) Haptics (handshake)

DISARM

Don’t forget to pay attention to the student’s nonverbal cues from the moment you greet them

DISARM Environment & Artifacts (what

does your office say about you?)

DISARM Environment & Artifacts (what

does your office say about you?)

2 & 3DISCOVER & DREAM

DISCOVER & DREAM Word Choice (open-ended questions)

How are you? Tell me about your day

Do you have any questions?

What questions do you have?

Have I answered all of your questions?

What else can I help with today?

Proactive vs. Reactive

DISCOVER & DREAM Vocalics (tone, pitch, volume, etc.)

“There’s nothing we can do”

“I can’t”“I must”“If only”

“Let’s look at our alternatives”“I choose”“I prefer”

“I will”

Adapted from Stephen Covey’s 7 Habits of Highly Effective People program

DISCOVER & DREAM

Kinesics & Facial Expressions (your body language should “match” your message)

Proxemics (face student, distance between you)

DISCOVER & DREAM

Kinesics & Facial Expressions (your body language should “match” your message)

Proxemics (face student, distance between you)

DISCOVER & DREAM Eye Contact

4DESIGN

DESIGN Environment & Artifacts (hands-on) Engage students with resources / tools

DESIGN Kinesics & Facial Expressions

Don’t get swept up in what you’re doing and

forget about your

expressions, reactions, etc.

ANGER FEAR DISGUST

SADNESSHAPPINESSSUPRISE

5DELIVER

DELIVER How you say it: language devices

DELIVER End on a positive note Follow-up after the appointment

6DON’T SETTLE

DON’T SETTLE Keep your cool

You did WHAT!‽!

DON’T SETTLE Pay attention – is he/she not

telling you something?

DON’T SETTLE Don’t give up in tough situations

DON’T SETTLE Go above and beyond

“There are no shortcuts to anyplace worth

going.”- Beverly Sills

TAKE WHAT YOU LEARNED, AND PUT IT INTO ACTION

We hope you enjoyed our presentation.

It’s Not Only What You Say, But How You Say It

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