Big Fat Gypsy Wedding Reveal 12-18 feb2011

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8/7/2019 Big Fat Gypsy Wedding Reveal 12-18 feb2011

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weillos lluslTVI Big FatGypsyWeddings hisenthralled the nation,

butthe realityofTraveller Iife has been hidden under

those giant pinkdresses, says Caroline*hen Caroline (not

her real name)

went to her local

priest recentlyto arrange her son's First Holy

Communion, she was turned

away. And she soon worked out

why. Since the TV documentary

series Brg Fot G ypsy Weddings

began on C4 last month, she

believes the Traveller community

has been tainted - a view shared,

she says, by many other Travellers.

ln order to speak out, Caroline

has insisted on being anonymous,

for fear of reprisals from families

featured in the show.'lt's mad, but just saying these

things could get me killedi says

Caroline, who is in her 30s. 'lf I

were identified, l'd have to go

into hiding with my children.

Disrespecting people in the

community ends in big fist fights.

'You're not allowed to criticise

another fumily. They would say:

"Who are you to contradict me

and myfamily?"'

At first, the mum-of-seven was

Christine Bleakleysentuptheshowon Daybreak

a TV series about her community.

She says: 'l thought it was good

that people would be made aware

of Travellers. We suffer a lot ofdiscrimination. You're always

scared that the neighbours will

find out who you are and the kids

willget bullied.

'We can't even book wedding

receptions under our real names.

lfthe venue finds out, they cancel.

Just because one lot ofTravellers

trashed somewhere, everyone

else has to suffer.'

Now, though, she feels the show

has been an embarrassment for

Travellers.'Millions have watchedit, but all anyone is talking about

are the dresses. We're a laughing

stock,'she says. 'When Christine

Bleakley wore a big pink wedding

dress on Doybreok, it was very

insulting. You wouldn't dare laugh

at an lndian woman in a sari.'Lots of Travellers phoned up

the programme to say that we

aren't like that. But it's too late.

'They haven't shown the

weddings and Communions

where Travellers wear normal

dresses. Even the show's name

is wrong. Most of the families on

the show are lrish Travellers, not

gypsies. Gypsies are Englishl

Caroline wishes the show

had shown the harsher side of

Traveller

life.

t'

Her own life has been far from

easy. One of 10 siblings, she was

born in London. She has an lrish

accent, but has never been to

lreland and has always lived in

a house.'lt's rubbish

that we choose to live

in houses -Travellers

can't get on to the sitesany more and are forced

to live in houses. There

aren't enough pitches

and councils refuse to

make new ones. I used to

dress for First Communion, itwas

a hand-me-down or borrowed.

'l didn't agree with the family on

the show who did the Communion

service when the little girl was six

- she was far tooyoung.

Lettingher get a spray tan was disgusting,

too. And she shouldn't have been

shown on TV in her knickers.'

Like many of the girls on the

show, Caroline left school aged

13 to help her mother raise her

siblings, and at 17 she married a

fellow Traveller. She has suffered

domestic violence and has spent

time in women's refuges.

'l didn't want to stay in school,

I just wanted to get married like all

the other girls. My wedding dress

was big and white, but not as big

as the ones in the show. Only girls

who had run awaywith a bloke

didn't wear a white dress.

'l've been through hell. I can't

go travelling about in the summer fit literacy classes in around

with the children, just to give them cooking, cleaning and caring for

that feeling of being a Traveller.' the kids. The man of the house

Her own First Communion is not supposed to help, which is

was nothing like the elaborate frustrating. lf you say something,

exhibitions shown on the TV it causes trouble. l'm trying to

show. 'l went to a Catholic school, bring my boys up to be more

where you learnt your prayers and responsible and considerate.recited them. You didn't get a big I want things to change.'

Caroline feels these issues

were lost on the show. 'ltt all

been about laughing at us. Many

Travellers are very religious, but

they've just shown kids dancing

around in revealing clothes. That

isn't Traveller culture.

'Those little girls have watched

their older sisters dancing to

Beyonc6. A lot ofthe party clothes

have been copied from shows like

Strictly Come Doncing, and thewedding dresses from Jordan.'l don't think the families

realised how it would come across.

And I think some of the Travellers

exaggerated things, like the boy

who claimed you can drink from

the age of I 1 . I bet he feels silly

now. Really, they've all been

exploited by the cameras.'

Caroline strongly believes the

show will only cause trouble for

Britai n's Travel lers.'Social services

aresure to be talking to some ofthe families featured. lt's made it

harder for the rest of us. Everyone

is talking aboutTravellers now - but

for all the wrong reasons.'El

@"read and write properly. l can't

.,t

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ffiitso sad that [some] Tnvellert wiv'o

ni* i6 pri uPwith domsticviolence'

@etliefutchem:fhepoor, poor' poor gil - she's

13 and cleaning a 'ai"nand'shds not getting

aneduation.

@missbeautyL:'Gypsywomen arc second-clas

iitizent -doYouagree?

TwesJw Wurvlawr @Revua l'|tsg on 7[,dlt€,/'Gp,ut

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