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PARENTAL
ALIENATIO
N
Un
de
rmin
ing
an
d in
terf
eri
ng
wit
h a
no
rma
lch
ild
-pa
ren
t b
on
d.
www.PAAwareness.org
WH
AT
CA
N Y
OU
DO
IF
YO
UR
CH
ILD
IS B
EIN
G A
LIE
NA
TE
D?
• D
o n
ot
arg
ue
or
ge
t d
efe
nsi
ve w
ith
yo
ur
child
,
it
cre
ate
s b
ad f
ee
ling
s an
d is
no
t lik
ely
to
ch
ang
e h
is/h
er
min
d.
• L
et
you
r ch
ild k
no
w t
hat
yo
u h
ave
a d
i!e
ren
t
un
de
rsta
nd
ing
of
the
sit
uat
ion
an
d y
ou
wo
uld
b
e w
illin
g t
o s
har
e y
ou
r p
ers
pe
ctiv
e if
an
d w
he
n
the
ch
ild is
inte
rest
ed
.
• C
on
tin
ue,
in a
ny
po
ssib
le w
ay, t
o le
t th
e c
hild
kn
ow
th
at h
e/s
he
is lo
ved
.
• C
on
tro
l yo
ur
ow
n a
ng
er
and
sta
y ca
lm,
e
ven
wh
en
hu
rt o
r fr
ust
rate
d.
• H
old
yo
urs
elf
to
th
e h
igh
est
po
ssib
le s
tan
dar
d
of
be
hav
ior
(do
no
t g
ive
th
e a
lie
na
tin
g p
are
nt
a
mm
un
itio
n).
• W
ork
on
imp
rovi
ng
yo
ur o
wn
par
enti
ng
ski
lls.
• A
lway
s ca
ll/p
ick
up
th
e c
hild
at
sch
ed
ule
d t
ime
s,
and
be
th
ere
eve
n if
yo
u k
no
w t
he
ch
ild w
on
't
be
ava
ilab
le.
• C
reat
e p
osi
tive
exp
eri
en
ces/
me
mo
rie
s w
ith
yo
ur
child
.
• P
rovi
de
me
nta
l he
alth
tre
atm
en
t fo
r yo
urs
elf
an
d y
ou
r ch
ild w
ith
pro
fess
ion
als
exp
eri
en
ced
w
ith
par
en
tal a
lien
atio
n.
• B
uild
a s
up
po
rt n
etw
ork
wit
h f
rie
nd
s, f
amily
,
co
mm
un
ity
reso
urc
es,
an
d s
up
po
rt g
rou
ps.
• B
eco
me
ed
uca
ted
an
d h
elp
oth
ers
invo
lve
d w
ith
yo
ur
child
to
lear
n m
ore
ab
ou
t p
aren
tal a
lien
atio
n.
• A
tte
mp
t to
wo
rk c
on
stru
ctiv
ely
wit
h t
he
oth
er
p
are
nt,
eit
he
r d
ire
ctly
or
thro
ug
h m
ed
iati
on
.
• C
on
tin
ue
to
att
em
pt
po
siti
ve c
om
mu
nic
atio
n,
on
a r
eg
ula
r b
asis
, eve
n if
th
e c
hild
re
ject
s o
r
ign
ore
s it
.
WH
AT
NO
T T
O D
O
• Do
no
t ig
no
re t
he
pro
ble
m–
it w
ill n
ot g
o a
way
.
• N
ever
giv
e u
p h
op
e an
d n
ever
giv
e u
p o
n y
ou
r ch
ild.
HO
W C
AN
YO
U H
EL
P A
CH
ILD
AN
D H
IS/H
ER
RE
JEC
TE
D P
AR
EN
T?
• L
iste
n t
o t
he
ch
ild, w
ith
ou
t n
eg
atin
g w
hat
th
e
child
is s
ayin
g, r
eg
ard
less
of
ho
w o
utl
and
ish
it
may
be
(th
at is
th
e c
hild
's r
eal
ity)
an
d t
he
n
en
cou
rag
e t
he
ch
ild t
o h
ear
th
e r
eje
cte
d
par
en
t's
po
int
of
view
. Ap
pe
al t
o t
he
ch
ild's
m
atu
rity
by
sayi
ng
th
at is
th
e w
ay m
atu
re p
eo
ple
h
and
le c
on
"ic
ts.
• A
pp
eal
to
th
e c
hild
's in
telle
ct b
y e
nco
ura
gin
g
him
/he
r to
car
efu
lly c
on
sid
er
ide
as o
r st
ate
me
nts
th
at a
re b
lata
ntl
y fa
lse
or
ou
tlan
dis
h.
• P
oin
t o
ut
to t
he
ch
ild h
ow
pe
rsu
asiv
e a
dve
rtis
ing
ca
n in
"u
en
ce a
pe
rso
n's
th
inki
ng
an
d t
ry t
o r
ela
te
that
to th
e ch
ild's
thin
kin
g a
bo
ut t
he
reje
cted
par
ent.
• L
oo
k fo
r bo
oks
or m
ovi
es th
at c
an s
tim
ula
te
dis
cuss
ion
ab
ou
t th
e im
po
rtan
ce o
f tw
o p
aren
ts
and
the
sad
nes
s o
f hav
ing
on
ly o
ne
par
ent.
• I
f ap
pro
pri
ate,
invi
te b
oth
th
e c
hild
an
d
reje
cte
d p
are
nt
to t
he
sam
e f
un
ctio
n, m
akin
g
the
child
aw
are
that
th
e re
ject
ed
par
ent
is v
alu
ed
an
d a
pp
reci
ate
d.
•L
oo
k fo
r op
po
rtu
nit
ies
to p
rovi
de
po
siti
ve in
pu
t
ab
ou
t th
e ta
rget
ed p
aren
t.
If y
ou
are
a te
ach
er, c
ou
nse
lor,
coa
ch, c
lerg
yma
n,
pa
ren
t of t
he
child
's fr
ien
d, f
rien
d, o
r fa
mily
mem
ber
:
Th
e in
form
ati
on
pro
vid
ed
in t
his
pa
mp
hle
t is
ba
sed
in
pa
rt o
n t
he
fo
llo
win
g w
ork
s:
Bak
er, A
.J.L
. (20
07).
Ad
ult
ch
ildre
n o
f pa
ren
tal a
lien
ati
on
syn
dro
me:
B
rea
kin
g t
he
ties
th
at
bin
d. N
Y: W
.W. N
ort
on
.
Cla
wa
r, S
.S. &
Riv
lan
, B. (
199
1). C
hil
dre
n h
eld
ho
sta
ge:
D
ea
lin
g w
ith
pro
gra
mm
ed
an
d b
rain
wa
she
d c
hil
dre
n.
Ch
ica
go
, IL:
Am
eri
can
Bar
Ass
oci
atio
n.
Dar
nal
l, D
. (19
98
). D
ivo
rce
Ca
sua
ltie
s: P
rote
ctin
g y
ou
r ch
ild
ren
fr
om
pa
ren
tal a
lien
ati
on
. Lan
ham
, MI:
Tayl
or
Trad
e.
Ran
d, D
., R
and
, R.,
& K
op
ets
ki, L
. (2
00
5).
The
Spec
tru
m o
f Pa
ren
tal
Alie
na
tio
n S
ynd
rom
e P
art
III:
The
Ko
pet
ski F
ollo
w-u
p S
tud
y.
Am
eri
can
Jo
urn
al o
f Fo
ren
sic
Psy
cho
log
y, 2
3(1
), 15
-43
.
War
shak
, R. (
20
01).
Div
orc
e p
ois
on
: Pro
tect
ing
th
e p
are
nt-
chil
d
bo
nd
fro
m a
vin
dic
tive
ex.
NY
: Har
pe
rCo
llin
s.
...ex
ten
din
g t
hro
ug
h t
he
yea
rs o
f ch
ild
ho
od a
nd a
do
lesc
ence
in
his
[o
r h
er]
rela
tio
ns
wit
h b
oth
pa
ren
ts, [a
ch
ild
] b
uil
ds
up w
ork
ing m
od
els
of
ho
w a
tta
chm
ent
fig
ure
s a
re l
ikel
y to
b
eha
ve t
ow
ard
s h
im i
n a
ny
vari
ety
of
situ
ati
on
s; a
nd o
n
tho
se m
od
els
are
ba
sed a
ll h
is e
xpec
tati
on
s, a
nd t
her
efo
re
all
his
pla
ns,
fo
r th
e re
st o
f h
is l
ife.
-Jo
hn
Bo
wlb
y, S
epa
rati
on, A
nxi
ety,
an
d A
nger
A c
on
�ic
ted
fam
ily d
ynam
ic
that
dra
ws
a ch
ild in
to
sid
ing
wit
h o
ne
par
en
t,
chan
gin
g a
pre
vio
usl
y g
oo
d
rela
tio
nsh
ip w
ith
a n
ow
reje
cte
d p
are
nt
in o
rde
r to
do
bat
tle
. Th
e c
hild
may
be
com
e p
reo
ccu
pie
d w
ith
crit
icis
ms
of
the
re
ject
ed
par
en
t, w
hic
h a
re n
orm
ally
inco
nse
qu
en
tial
,
exa
gg
era
ted
, or
un
fou
nd
ed
in r
eal
ity.
A p
are
nt
may
un
de
rsta
nd
th
e t
he
ore
tica
l im
po
rtan
ce o
f th
e
oth
er
par
en
t in
th
e li
fe o
f th
e c
hild
, bu
t b
elie
ves
his
or
he
r ca
se is
th
e e
xce
pti
on
.
WH
AT
IS P
AR
EN
TAL
AL
IEN
AT
ION
?
Ba
dm
ou
thin
g t
he
re
ject
ed
pa
ren
t, s
uch
as
• S
pe
akin
g n
eg
ativ
ely
ab
ou
t a
par
en
t to
, or
in
fro
nt
of,
the
ch
ild.
• I
nac
cura
tely
or
un
tru
thfu
lly t
elli
ng
th
e c
hild
ab
ou
t th
e r
eje
cte
d p
are
nt,
or
sug
ge
stin
g t
he
y
are
un
safe
or
dan
ge
rou
s.
• E
xag
ge
rati
ng
min
or
�aw
s in
th
e r
eje
cte
d p
are
nt.
• I
nap
pro
pri
atel
y co
n!
din
g a
du
lt in
form
atio
n w
ith
th
e ch
ild.
Inte
rfe
rin
g in
a c
hil
d’s
co
nta
ct w
ith
are
ject
ed
pa
ren
t, s
uch
as
• T
hro
win
g o
ut
gif
ts a
nd
lett
ers
fro
m t
he
re
ject
ed
par
en
t.
• C
allin
g e
xce
ssiv
ely
du
rin
g t
ime
wit
h t
he
re
ject
ed
par
en
t.
• E
arly
pic
kup
s o
r la
te d
rop
o"
s fo
r ti
me
wit
h t
he
re
ject
ed
par
en
t.
• F
orb
idd
ing
an
y re
fere
nce
to
, or
ph
oto
s o
f th
e
reje
cte
d p
are
nt.
• S
che
du
ling
act
ivit
ies
that
co
mp
ete
wit
h t
ime
w
ith
th
e r
eje
cte
d p
are
nt.
• M
on
ito
rin
g o
r fo
rbid
din
g c
om
mu
nic
atio
n o
r
tim
e w
ith
th
e r
eje
cte
d p
are
nt.
ALI
EN
AT
ION
? W
HY
WO
ULD
TH
E C
HIL
DB
EL
IEV
E T
HE
AL
IEN
AT
ING
PA
RE
NT
?
• T
he
ch
ild f
ee
ls t
he
ne
ed
to
pro
tect
a p
are
nt
wh
o
is d
ep
ress
ed
, an
xio
us,
or
ne
ed
y.
• T
he
ch
ild w
ants
to
avo
id t
he
an
ge
r o
r re
ject
ion
o
f th
e a
lien
atin
g p
are
nt.
• T
he
ch
ild h
as u
nre
solv
ed
fe
elin
gs
abo
ut
the
re
ject
ed
par
en
t an
d t
he
div
orc
e.
• M
ay la
ck t
he
cap
acit
y to
fe
el g
uilt
y ab
ou
t
inco
nsi
de
rate
or
cru
el b
eh
avio
rs t
ow
ard
th
e
reje
cte
d p
are
nt,
or
to f
org
ive
an
y p
ast
con
�ic
ts.
ALI
EN
AT
ED
CH
ILD
RE
N M
AY
GR
OW
UP
TO
BE
CO
ME
AD
ULT
S W
HO
:
AL
IEN
AT
ING
BE
HA
VIO
RS
INC
LUD
E:
•
Hav
e t
rou
ble
tru
stin
g o
the
rs.
• H
ave
low
se
lf-e
ste
em
.
• H
ave
di#
cult
ly s
ust
ain
ing
inti
mat
e r
ela
tio
nsh
ips.
• E
xper
ien
ce s
ham
e fo
r h
urt
ing
th
e re
ject
ed
par
ent.
• S
u"
er
fro
m d
ep
ress
ion
.
• E
ng
age
in s
ub
stan
ce a
bu
se t
o r
elie
ve t
he
pai
n
of p
aren
tal a
lien
atio
n.
• A
re m
ore
like
ly t
o e
xpe
rie
nce
div
orc
e.
• A
re m
ore
like
ly t
o h
ave
di#
cult
y w
ith
au
tho
rity
an
d t
he
law
.
• E
xpe
rie
nce
th
e lo
ss o
f
the
ir o
wn
ch
ildre
n
thro
ug
h p
aren
tal
alie
nat
ion
.
ww
w.P
AA
wa
ren
ess
.org
• P
are
nta
l A
lie
na
tio
n A
wa
ren
ess
Org
an
iza
tio
n
Ma
nip
ula
tin
g a
ch
ild
to
re
ject
a p
are
nt,
su
ch a
s
• W
ith
dra
win
g lo
ve, i
nd
uci
ng
gu
ilt f
or
hav
ing
fu
n
or
fee
ling
love
to
war
d a
re
ject
ed
par
en
t.
Un
de
rmin
ing
ch
ild
’s r
ela
tio
nsh
ip w
ith
th
e
reje
cte
d p
are
nt,
su
ch a
s
• A
skin
g t
he
ch
ild t
o s
py
on
or
kee
p s
ecr
ets
fro
m
the
re
ject
ed
par
en
t.
• F
orc
ing
th
e c
hild
to
ch
oo
se b
etw
ee
n p
are
nts
.
• Cre
atin
g c
on
�ic
t b
etw
ee
n t
he
ch
ild a
nd
th
e r
eje
cte
d p
are
nt.
• I
nte
rro
gat
ing
th
e c
hild
aft
er
tim
e w
ith
a
reje
cte
d p
are
nt.
• P
rovi
din
g th
e ch
ild w
ith
inap
pro
pri
ate
info
rmat
ion
ab
ou
t !
nan
ces,
mar
riag
e o
r d
ivo
rce
issu
es.
• A
ccu
sin
g t
he
reje
cted
par
ent
of c
ausi
ng
em
oti
on
al
pai
n t
o t
he
fav
ore
d p
are
nt
that
th
e c
hild
sh
ou
ld
he
lp t
o h
eal.
• G
ivin
g t
he
ch
ild
pa
ren
tal
de
cisi
on
ma
kin
g
au
tho
rity
, ie
wh
eth
er
to v
isit
wit
h t
he
re
ject
ed
pa
ren
t.
Un
de
rmin
ing
th
e r
eje
cte
d p
are
nt’
s ro
le in
th
e
chil
d’s
life
, su
ch a
s
• R
efu
sin
g t
o p
rovi
de
th
e c
hild
’s in
form
atio
n
(me
dic
al, e
du
cati
on
al, e
tc.),
to
th
e re
ject
ed
par
ent.
• N
ot
invi
tin
g/i
nfo
rmin
g t
he
rej
ect
ed
par
en
t o
f
imp
ort
ant e
ven
ts. (
awar
ds,
ho
no
rs, g
rad
uat
ion
s, e
tc)
• R
efu
sin
g t
o p
rovi
de
oth
ers
wit
h t
he
re
ject
ed
p
are
nt’
s co
nta
ct in
form
atio
n.
• R
ewri
tin
g h
isto
ry t
o r
ed
uce
a r
eje
cte
d p
are
nt’
s
role
in t
he
ch
ild’s
life
.
AN
ALI
EN
AT
ED
CH
ILD
OF
PA
RE
NT
SIN
CO
NFL
ICT
MA
Y:
• E
xpre
ss r
ele
ntl
ess
, un
amb
igu
ou
s h
atre
d t
ow
ard
th
e r
eje
cte
d p
are
nt
and
th
eir
sid
e o
f th
e f
amily
.
• O
bse
ssiv
ely
par
rots
th
e f
avo
red
par
en
t w
ith
ou
t
reg
ard
fo
r th
eir
ow
n h
isto
rica
l exp
eri
en
ces.
• R
efu
se t
o s
pe
nd
tim
e, v
isit
, or
com
mu
nic
ate
wit
h
the
re
ject
ed
par
en
t.
• H
old
ne
gat
ive
be
liefs
ab
ou
t th
e r
eje
cte
d p
are
nt
th
at a
re in
con
seq
ue
nti
al, e
xag
ge
rate
d, o
r
un
fou
nd
ed
in r
eal
ity.
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