Marketing campaigns: a sampler platter by Walt Jaschek

“Somebody still cares about the concept?”

“And keeping it simple?”

Yes.

Outdoor boards for SSM Joint Replacement Center. Agency: Maring Weissman.

Outdoor boards for SSM Joint Replacement Center. Agency: Maring Weissman.

Tagline, landing pages, banner ads, TV commercials, outdoor for Central Baptist. Agency: Maring Weissman.

Tagline, landing pages, banner ads, TV commercials, outdoor for Central Baptist. Agency: Maring Weissman.

These are animated banner ads. Wish you could see the animation.

Music: Dramatic score. A white screen. Type appears.ANNOUNCER: This is the machine that healed Alan’s heart.

Cut to: quick shots of sophisticated magnetic imaging systems as music intensifies.

Music suddently drops out. White screen. Type appears.ANNOUNCER: This… is Alan’s heart.

Cut to: a 40something wife in a living room.Husband Alan moves next to her, leans in, kisses her.

She kisses back with a little extra something. He turns back to camera, glasses fogged.ANNOUNCER: Central Baptist Hospital. This is care.

:30 TV “ALAN’S HEART”

Web landing pages, brand brochure, print ads for Grey Goose Vodka. Agency: Moosylvana.

Tagline, website, and brochure for Parkside Financial Bank & Trust.

Posters and print ads for Contegix Cloud Computing. Agency: Spoke Marketing.

Tagline, brand brochure, print ads, banner ads for Arco Construction. Agency: Maring Weissman.

Tagline, ads, website, outdoor, direct mailfor The Omni Clubchain. Agency: Spoke.

Tagline, ads, website, outdoor, direct mailfor The Omni Clubchain. Agency: Spoke.

Tagline, landing pages, banner ads, print ads, FSI, outdoor for Hodgson Mill. Designer: Perry Propst.

Tagline, landing pages, banner ads, print ads, FSI, outdoor for Hodgson Mill. Designer: Perry Propst.

SFX: Electric shaving clippers, under YOUNG MAN: I’m shaving my head!

OLDER MAN: I shaved my head! ANNCR: All over Miami, they’re shaving their heads...

TV, Outoor and Print for “Star Trek: the Next Generation.” Agency: World Wide Wadio

:30 TV “I’M SHAVING MY HEAD!”

TV, Outoor and Print for “Star Trek: the Next Generation.” Agency: World Wide Wadio

ANNOUNCER: ...like Jean-Luc Picard, the bold, bald head of “Star Trek: the Next Generation.”

ANNOUNCER: Get the look!DOG (turns shaved head to camera and barks)

ANNCR: The Jean-Luc look! ANNOUNCER: Star Trek: the Next Generation. Weekdays this Fall on Channel 6.

BRIDE: Brad, I knew we were meant to be together when you said we should get our car loan from CEFCU.

[An unbelieving uncle in attendance can’t quite believe he’shearing the bride correctly. Is she plugging CEFCU? Yes.]

BRIDE: You said, “CEFCU had the best rates,” and you were right. You said, “We could trust CEFCU the most...”

BRIDE: ...and you were right. I thought, “ˇThis is the guy for me...”

Tagline, TV commercials, radio commercials and print ads for CEFCU Credit Unions. Agency: Maring Weismann.

:30 TV “WEDDING VOWS”

Tagline, TV commercials, radio commercials and print ads for CEFCU Credit Unions. Agency: Maring Weismann.

BRIDE: And I was right! UNBELIEVING UNCLE (to wife:)They should never let them write their own vows.

Aunt shoots him a “shoosh” look. ANNOUNCER: CEFCU. Not a bank. Better.

ANNOUNCER: And now, mister Robert Goulet reads from “The Writings of Bart,” the collected, after-school blackboard writings of young Bart Simpson. Mister Goulet.

SFX: CLASSICAL MUSIC, UNDER

ROBERT GOULET: I will not trade pants with others.I will not do that thing with my tongue.I will not Xerox my butt.A burp is not an answer.I will not pledge allegiance to Bart.I will not eat things for money.I will not bring sheep to class.I will not instigate revolution.My name is not Doctor Death.

ANNOUNCER: To experience all of Bart’s after-school blackboard writings, watch every classic episode of The Simpsons.

ROBERT GOULET: I will not call the principal, “Spud Head.”

ANNOUNCER: The Simpsons. Now five times a week.

MUSIC UP AND OUT

Producer: Paul Fey. Agency: World Wide Wadio.

:60 RADIOfor The Simpsons

“ROBERTGOULET”

INTERVIEWER: It’s CBS Premiere Week and we’re back with the great Ted Danson.

TED DANSON: Ooo! Thank you! INTERVIEWER: Ted, you’re the new star of CSI tonight on CBS. And you’ve done so many great things in your career. I’m sort of intimidated -- I don’t even know what to ask.

TED DANSON: Well, let’s see, you could ask me if I was excited to be joining the cast of CSI. And the answer, of course, would be, “Yes, I’m very excited.”

INTERVIEWER: Uh-huh.

TED DANSON: Also, you could ask me about my character, and I can tell you he’s the new team leader of the CSI graveyard shift. And he’s completedly devoted to his wife and kids.

INTERVIEWER: Cool...

TED DANSON: Or, you could ask me if I think this is going to be the best season yet on CSI, and I would say, “abso-freaking-lutely!”

INTERVIEWER: That’s great!

TED DANSON: Yeah! Hey... nice interview!

INTERVIEWER: Thank you.

TED DANSON: You’re welcome.

MUSIC UP AND UNDER

INTERVIEWER: It’s the season premiere of CSI. Tonight on CBS.

MUSIC OUT

Producer: Paul Fey. Agency: World Wide Wadio.

:60 RADIOfor CBS-TVand CSI

“TED DANSONINTERVIEW”

SFX: Telephone ring, followed by phone pick-up

NO-NONSENSE COP: Missing Persons.

GOOFY OLD GUY (phone filtered:) Missing Persons?

COP: Missing Persons.

OLD GUY: My wife is missing.

COP: Your wife is missing?

OLD GUY: My wife is missing.

COP: When did you last see her?

OLD GUY: Four o’clock.

COP: Four o’clock?

OLD GUY: Four o’clock.

COP: Where’s your TV, sir?

OLD GUY: The bedroom.

COP: Have you checked IN the bedroom, sir?

OLD GUY: No.

COP: She’s probably watching “Matlock!”

OLD GUY: “Matlock” is on at four o’clock?

COP: Every weekday at four on Channel Two. Go check your bedroom, sir. I’ll wait.

[SFX: Guy puts down phone. He walks down hall. He opens bedroom door. We hear a snippet of the show . Guy closes the bedroom door. He walks back down hall. Picks up phone.]

OLD GUY: Hello?

COP: I’m here.

OLD GUY: She’s watching “Matlock!”

COP: I thought so.

OLD GUY: I didn’t know “Matlock” was on at four o’clock.

COP: Every weekday at four on Channel Two.

OLD GUY: She really likes Andy Griffith!

COP: Of course she does.

OLD GUY: She was so busy watching “Matlock,” she forgot to tell me where she was!

COP: Tell her I understand.

OLD GUY: Okay.

SFX: The goofy guy puts down phone, walks down hall again.

COP: Wait! I didn’t mean now! Sir?

SFX: Goofy guy opens bedroom door. Matlock is still playing.

OLD GUY: Hey! My favorite episode!

COP: I’m hanging up now sir. Sir?

Producer: Paul Fey. Agency: World Wide Wadio.

:60 RADIOfor Matlock

“MISSINGPERSONS”

ANNOUNCER: Put your tongue on the radio.

[An uncomfortable beat of silence.]

ANNOUNCER: Wait, that might be a little tingly. Ahem. Don’t put your tongue on the radio. But do stick your tongue out. That’s right. Keep going. There. Good. Wow! Look how long it is! Man, you have a long tongue! Congrats! MUSIC: BAND WARMING UP, UNDER ANNOUNCER: But it’s all relative, baby, because, sorry, you have a tiny, teeny-weenie tongue compared to... SFX: ROCK CONCERT

GENE (from stage): I’m Gene Simmons. Rock God. SFX: CROWD CHEERS MUSIC: ROCK KICKS IN ANNOUNCER: It’s the rock-meets-reality show that licks ‘em all! Gene Simmons Family Jewels – Season 2 premiere! Starring the man who has more talent than you can shake a tongue at. GENE: Precisely. ANNOUNCER: Gene Simmons Family Jewels. A&E Sunday. Oh, one more thing: MUSIC: OUT ANNOUNCER: Please put your tongue back in. The guy is the van is staring.

Producer: Paul Fey. Agency: World Wide Wadio.

:30 RADIOfor Gene SimmonsFamily Jewels

“PUT YOUR TONGUEON THE RADIO”

More details and further credits

on all this work (plus stuff to play, hear)

are @WaltNow.com

Thank you.

Creative Director. Big Idea Guy.314.479.1966

walt@waltnow.com

Walt Jaschek.