Learning to listen

Learning to listen

by

Brian Birdow

Luke 6:27-36

Fact

The majority of people don’t listen well!

Most people are only concerned about getting their point across.

Most would rather talk than listen!

People become very disinterested if they don’t have the speaking stage!

Why do people not listen?

Because they have a short attention span

I’d rather talk- by talking people feel important, useful, and attractive.

When I talk I am in control, I can steer the conversation any direction I please.

Also when I talk I am the center of attention! All eyes on me!

Why do people not listen?1. Because they do not like the person

2. Envious of the person (Matt.28:18, Mk.15:10, Acts.5:17)

3. The persons attitude

a. Arrogant

b. A know it all

c. Snobbish


Because of Distractions!Busy thinking

We talk at 200-250 words per minute but can listen at 300-500 words per minute. Thus when the other person is talking, we get side-tracked by our won thoughts . When we come back into the room, we find that we have lost track of the conversation. Rather than lose face and become embarrassed by this, we nod , smile and hope nobody will notice


Because of Distractions! Busy waiting When we have decided that we want to

respond to the speaker, we then stop listening for three reasons.

1. To avoid forgetting what we want to say

2. And to find better ways to state our case

3. Looking for an opportune time to interject


IT’S NOT INTERESTING Speakers are responsible for their listeners

every bit as much as the listeners are responsible for listening!

1. Monotone voice---------------

2. Boring and uninteresting language

3. No body language!

4. Talking for too long

5. Not giving the listener an opportunity to reply


I’m busy talkingPeople who are talking usually have attention

on themselves and what they are saying. With this self-focus, they do not notice that other people are waiting to spak or want to comment about what the speaker has said. Even if they do notice, many people will continue to talk, either to retain CONTROL or to fulfill their need for completion.

EVEN IF NOBODY IS LISTENING!!!!

Wisdom Speaks!

James 1:19 Ye know this, my beloved brethren. But let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath:

Proverbs 15:31 The ear that hearkeneth to the reproof of life Shall abide among the wise.

Words of JESUS

Mark 4:9 And he said, Who hath ears to hear, let him hear.

Mark 4:23 If any man hath ears to hear, let him hear.

First class conditional sentence - SINCE!

Words of JESUS

Mark 4:24 And he said unto them, Take heed what ye hear: with what measure ye mete it shall be measured unto you; and more shall be given unto you.

Pay attention to what you hear! (H.McCord)

What you hear will often times shape you view and judgment!

Gossip!2 Thessalonians 3:11 For we hear that there are

some which walk among you disorderly, working not at all, but are busybodies.

1 Timothy 5:13 And withal they learn to be idle, wandering about from house to house; and not only idle, but tattlers also and busybodies, speaking things which they ought not.

1 Peter 4:15 But let none of you suffer as a murderer, or as a thief, or as an evildoer, or as a busybody in other men's matters.

What do your children hear?i. Hateful words about_________?

ii. Gossip T.V. and Radio (Xtra, TMZ, etc..)

iii. Mom and Dad fussing and fighting?

iv. Cursing and words of hate?

v. Word of encouragement or discouragement?

Remember…

Proverbs 15:4 A gentle tongue is a tree of life; But perverseness therein is a breaking of the spirit.

Proverbs 15:1 A soft answer turneth away wrath; But a grievous word stirreth up anger.

Our children should constantly Hear GOD

• Deuteronomy 6:5 And thou shalt love the LORD thy God with all thine heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy might.

• Deuteronomy 6:6 And these words, which I command thee this day, shall be in thine heart:

• Deuteronomy 6:7 And thou shalt teach them diligently unto thy children, and shalt talk of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou liest down, and when thou risest up.

Learn to actively LISTEN!

So if I understand you correctly. . . . .

Repeat what they said or summarize it so you have clarity and know how to respond.

Explain yourself thoroughly. Direct answers yes, no, there is a possibility..

Spiritual

Learning to listen