Early Childhood Education

• As adults, we know how to make friends, it’s almost instinctive.

• We start talking to someone casually, asking questions and discovering if we have anything in common. 

• Eventually, we exchange numbers, make plans and…voila! We have a new friend!

• But when you look around an early childhood education setting, building friendships looks quite a bit different.

• Most of the time, we see babies and toddlers happily play right next to each other, never really interacting at all! And when they do, there’s usually pinching and grabbing and crying involved. But why is this?

• Are we born with such poor social skills? Not at all! Playing together is a learned skill, and just like every other area of development, there are stages that children go through to learn how to make friends.

• Babies are born social. They smile at those who smile at them and they giggle no matter who is playing peek-a-boo with them.

• And when it comes to other children and babies, they are captivated! Even toddlers love interacting with people, though sometimes only from the safety of a loved one’s arms.

• No matter how much they love seeing and even briefly interacting with others, when it comes to playtime they enjoy doing their own thing.

• Babies and young toddlers are very egocentric, their world revolves around their needs and wants.

• When they want to play with something, they want to explore and learn, playing with it their way, not sharing it with someone else.

• So when you look around an early childhood education center, you’ll notice that most of the younger children are playing next to each other, not really together.

• This is called parallel play, and it’s a typical stage of development that all babies and young toddlers go through on their way to learning how to be social with others.

• It’s actually not until toddlers are between three and four years old that they really start branching out and interacting with their peers, as opposed to next to them.

• This type of play, called associative play, usually involves a lot of interaction between children, but it doesn’t really involve cooperating together, following rules, or even taking turns.

• This type of play, called associative play, usually involves a lot of interaction between children, but it doesn’t really involve cooperating together, following rules, or even taking turns.

• Eventually this play evolves into games with rules and some sort of structure, children working together to create an end result.

• This type of play, known as cooperative play, usually shows up between the ages of four and five. Children may have assigned roles and talk to each other about what the plan is in order to reach a common goal. 

• They are learning to respect property, ask for permission to play, and are more willing to share their toys. 

• Cooperative play requires less guidance in an early childhood setting than the earlier stages, and more observation from adults, as they problem solve their way to success!

• Making friends is a learned skill, and it’s one that takes time. After all, sharing, and playing is a learning process, and requires a lot of guidance. But watching children evolve from playing next to each other to playing with each other is so rewarding.

• So watch your child play next to another child, and rest assured that they will make the next step, building friendships as they build their social skills.

• Watching children evolve and grow to become great friends is one of the most rewarding parts of being in an early childhood setting like ours!