CHANGING OUR

SELF-TALK

Examining how we talk to ourselves

Created by I M Confident Niagara Canada

Self-talk is how you talk to yourself, either aloud or silently and mentally.

An internal conversation where you provide opinions and evaluations about yourself.

Can be either positive or negative and both have an impact on how you feel about yourself.

WHAT IS SELF-TALK?

Boosts your confidence Keeps you from feeling depressed or

negative Eliminates stress Keeps you healthier Improves your body, mind and soul Helps build good relationships Increases happiness and success

POSITIVE SELF-TALK

Destroys self-esteem Distorts views of people and situations Creates a negative perspective Causes communication breakdowns Tears apart relationships Limits abilities Limits happiness and success Causes stress

NEGATIVE SELF-TALK

Research shows that we have a negative bias, that we tend to think more negative thoughts than positive thoughts

We think thousands of thoughts each day and over 80% are negative

Living in a negative environment creates a bad habit of negative thinking

We talk to ourselves in a negative way and become own worst enemy

Need to work hard to focus on positive thinking

NEGATIVE THINKING IS MORE NATURAL….

We don’t do anything right Will never have any friends Have no value Nobody will ever love us Will never be happy or successful There is no hopeNegative thinking can destroy our entire world!

WHAT NEGATIVE THINKING TELLS US

You are getting a vaccine as a child and the doctor says, “This is going to hurt”. So every time you get a needle, you expect that it will hurt. Everyone has a different pain tolerance and may not experience pain, so this is a false statement.

Your mother tells you not to sit on a public toilet seat because it is dirty. This can create a fear of using public toilets. It would have been better to show you how to clean or cover the seat so you could use it comfortably.

A friend tells you about a new employee at your company who is “very mean and you should stay away from them”. This will probably stop you from even finding out what that person is really like. They might be a very nice person, but somebody has experienced a personality conflict with them and has a biased opinion.

NEGATIVITY FROM THE PAST

1. Become aware of your thoughts2. Listen to what you are actually

saying3. Think about how your words make

you feel4. Change any negative words into

positive words5. Keep practising daily

HOW TO CHANGE SELF-TALK

POSITIVE OR NEGATIVE SELF-TALK?

Are these statements positive or negative?

1. I’m too stupid to learn anything. No point going to college.

2. I’m so fat, I will never lose weight. No point going on a diet or exercising.

3. I’m not a good communicator, but I try hard to talk to people.

4. I make a lot of mistakes, but I always try to learn something and do better the next time.

5. Nobody likes me so I will never have any friends.

6. I have a great family who supports me and loves me.

1. I CAN’T becomes I CAN. 2. I WON’T becomes I WILL.3. I DON’T becomes I DO.4. I SHOULDN’T becomes I SHOULD.5. I’M NOT becomes I AM6. I’M AFRAID becomes I’M NOT

AFRAID.

NEGATIVE WORDS CAN BECOME POSITIVE WORDS

CHANGING NEGATIVE TO POSITIVE

Change these negative statements into positive statements.

1. I’m too stupid to learn anything.

2. I’m so fat, I will never lose weight.

3. Nobody likes me.

4. I can’t do anything right.

5. Everyone tells me I’m a loser.

6. My life is a mess.

Positive people can lift your mood and help you focus on staying positive

Meet with people who have same interests as you – a group, club, church, meeting, sports

Eliminate or cut down on time spent with negative people (may be hard with close family or friends but do the best you can)

Develop a positive perspective and then influence any negative people you come in contact with

Can you think of any people who have a positive influence on you?

SURROUND YOURSELF WITH POSITIVE PEOPLE

Read inspirational books Listen to upbeat, happy music Watch family, funny movies on TV Put up comforting, colourful pictures or poster

with motivational sayings Have comfortable furniture and colourful

decorations Get a pet (if you like animals)Name some positive things that you could surround yourself with?

SURROUND YOURSELF WITH POSITIVE THINGS

Go to spots that are warm and friendly Enjoy the beauty in nature Meet a friend for coffee Take your family out to dinner Avoid dark, dangerous places

Name some positive places that you enjoy going to.

BE IN POSITIVE PLACES