LAMPLIGHTER BOOTH_______:

•The Little Lamb – caring, initiative

•Tom Watkins Mistake – short cuts

•True Stories of Great Americans•Stick to the Raft – perseverance, honesty•Mary Jones and Her Bible – perseverance•Boys of Grit (1-3) – overcoming obstacles•Clean Your Boots, Sir? – honesty, thoughtfulness, hard work•Rosa of Linden Castle – creative alternatives, perseverance

•http://youtube.com/watch?v=dBp2_ygcTSA

Recommended Resources:

Biographies:•If I Perish•John Newton•Susanna Wesley•George Mueller•Amy Carmichael•Gladys Aylward•Hudson Taylor•D.L. Moody

Recommended Resources:

Other Titles:•Message to Garcia – initiative•The Ultimate Gift –sacrifice•The Disciplined Life

LAMPLIGHTER BOOTH____

What motivates one to work diligently?

Motivation based on what we V________.

Value is determined by an understanding and appreciation of

W______________.

What motivates one to work diligently?

Motivation based on what we VALUE.

(Jonathan cleaning room)

Value is determined by an understanding and appreciation of

WORTH or lack thereof.(Mohonk)

A DISTORTED VIEW OF WORTH WILL LEAD TO MISGUIDED

MOTIVATIONS OR DEMOTIVATION.

Motivation is based on what we VALUE.

What we value drives our passions.

Value is Subjective.

Worth is Objective.Tastes are cultivated: think on tihngs

Worth is determined by STRENGTH, BEAUTY, & INTRINSIC VALUE.

i.e. Woolworth, Wadsworth, Wordsworth--GOD.

Worth generates confidence through character development.Confidence infuses hope. (language arts)And hope makes us not ashamed. (mail)

“Suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and

character produces hope, and hope makes us not ashamed

(does not disappoint).”Romans 5

“But hope deferred makes the heart sick.”

(never good enough)

“Fathers do not provoke your children, lest they become discouraged.” Col 3:21

Athumos

Cell phone

“But when desire comes it is a tree of life.”

Proverbs 13

I call this “breakthrough.”

patio

_____________ yourself also in the Lord, and He shall give you the desires of your

heart.

Psm. 37:4

Worth is therefore cultivated bysacrifice & perseverance.

So how do I motivate my child to persevere through difficulties?

1. Role models *good and bad

2. Rewards of Risk 3. Emulation

“Go to the ant, you sluggard! Consider her ways and be wise, which, having no captain, overseer or ruler, provides her supplies in the summer, and gathers her food in the harvest.

How long will you slumber, O sluggard? When will you rise from your sleep? A little sleep, a little slumber, a little folding of the

hands to sleep—so shall your poverty come on you like a prowler, and your need like an

armed man.” -Proverbs 6:6-11

Fenelon

“I went by the field of the lazy man, and by the vineyard of the man devoid of understanding; and there it was, all

overgrown with thorns; its surface was covered with nettles; its stone wall was

broken down. When I saw it, I considered it well; I looked on it and received

instruction: a little sleep, a little slumber, a little folding of the hands to rest; so

shall your poverty come like a prowler, and your need like an armed man.”

Proverbs 24:30-34

“He who digs a pit will fall into it, and whoever breaks through a wall will be bitten

by a serpent. He who quarries stones may be hurt by them, and he who splits wood may be

endangered by it.” -Ecclesiastes 10:8-9

“If the ax is dull, and one does not sharpen the edge, then he must use more strength;

but _________ brings _________.” -Ecclesiastes 10:10

“He who digs a pit will fall into it, and whoever breaks through a wall will be bitten

by a serpent. He who quarries stones may be hurt by them, and he who splits wood may be

endangered by it.” -Ecclesiastes 10:8-9

“If the ax is dull, and one does not sharpen the edge, then he must use more strength;

but WISDOM brings SUCCESS.” -Ecclesiastes 10:10

“Do you see a man diligent in his work? He will stand before kings;

He will not stand before mean men.”

Proverbs 22:29

Emulation must be use sparingly but role models must be before our

children’s eyes and ears at every opportunity.

Role models found in worthy literature helps to form moral values, realigns personalities, &

leads to the development of strong and focused minds.

Literature where characters possess redeeming values, will motivate readers to adopt a similar moral code that has now be

been etched into their awakened conscience.

Harry Potter & President Ronald Reagan

Models to Follow

William Kirk Kilpatrick, a contemporary Christian psychologist and social critic, reveals how stories infuse moral values through models who demonstrate concrete ethical behavior. (Teddy, Ishmael and Boys of Grit, for example.)

Stories with heroes and heroines along with poetry and music have been the foundation for a child’s education from the ancient Egyptians and Hebrews through the mid 1800’s. One of the greatest teacher’s, Francois Fenelon of the 17th century, turned an incorrigible child into a prince by using stories as his primary curriculum. Stories inspire readers to act morally by motivating them to imitate the characters that have become their heroes and heroines. (Ishmael)

17th Century Wisdom of Fenelon

Let us here remark a great defect in the modes of education. We put all the pleasure

on one side, and all the weariness on the other; the weariness on that of study, the

pleasure on that diversion. What can a child do but impatiently support the drudgery of

learning, and run ardently after play? Let us endeavor to change this order.

It is proven that the right hemisphere of a boys brain develops first which regulates spatial regulation,

navigation, & mental rotation of objects (engineering), whereas the left hemisphere of a girls brain develops

first, regulating language skills. Girls also have a thicker corpus collosum, which facilitates communication

between both hemispheres, giving girls an advantage of linking analytical and verbal skills simultaneously. Brain scans of men and women performing identical mental

tasks show women using both hemispheres simultaneously, whereas men focus their brain activity in one hemisphere or the other for a given task. Thus, the

learning environment for boys should lend itself to spatial orientation settings that are structured.

Too much regularity in exacting from them an uninterrupted application to study, hurts them too much; those

who govern often affect this regularity, because it is more

convenient to themselves, than subjecting themselves continually to the proper moments of instruction.

Let us render study pleasing. Let us mix difficulty with liberty and delight. Let us

suffer the children to interrupt their study by diversion; these distractions are

necessary, and ought therefore to be allowed, purposely to refresh their minds, that are so easily fatigued even by short application. Suffer them to walk about a little; permit them even now and then,

some digression, or some play, that will unbend their minds; then bring them back

gently to the task.

Webster’s 1828 defines depression as:“sinking of the spirits, to press

down, to lower in value—devalue.”

What do you do when something is deflated?

Fill it! With what? __________.

Webster’s 1828 defines depression as:“sinking of the spirits, to press

down, to lower in value.”

What do you do when something is deflated?

Fill it! With what? HOPE!

Hope makes us not ___________.Rom. 5

Shame causes ________. (Jonathan and the mail.)

Perfect love casts out_____. I Jn.

Fear involves __________. I Jn.

Hope makes us not ASHAMED. Rom. 5

Shame causes ________. (Jonathan and the mail.)

Perfect love casts out_____. I Jn.

Fear involves __________. I Jn.

Hope makes us not ASHAMED. Rom. 5

Shame causes FEAR. (Jonathan and the mail.)

Perfect love casts out_____. I Jn.

Fear involves __________. I Jn.

Hope makes us not ASHAMED. Rom. 5

Shame causes FEAR. (Jonathan and the mail.)

Perfect love casts out_____. I Jn.

Fear involves __________. I Jn.

Hope makes us not ASHAMED.Rom. 5

Shame causes FEAR. (Jonathan and the mail.)

Perfect love casts out FEAR. I Jn.

Fear involves __________. I Jn.

Hope makes us not ASHAMED.Rom. 5

Shame causes FEAR. (Jonathan and the mail.)

Perfect love casts out FEAR. I Jn.

Fear involves PUNISHMENT. I Jn.

Chief - Wildest Horse in the West!

“Addison saw that the best horse-people are neither aggressive nor submissive. ‘If you’re selfish, you

disconnect, and if you give too much, you disconnect. What is most

important is that they trust you will not hurt them.’”

Cell here or at end.

Fully _____, fully ______, without _____ of rejection. Love never _____.

However, an authoritative parent/teacher whose eye is ever upon their child, who is

constantly scolding, thinking they are fulfilling their educative role in pardoning

nothing, will oppress their child, especially parents who place the weight of the family

concerns upon them; all of this only torments and discourages.

Fenelon

Fully LOVED, fully ______, without _____ of rejection. Love never _____.

However, an authoritative parent/teacher whose eye is ever upon their child, who is

constantly scolding, thinking they are fulfilling their educative role in pardoning

nothing, will oppress their child, especially parents who place the weight of the family

concerns upon them; all of this only torments and discourages.

Fenelon

Fully LOVED, fully KNOWN, without _____ of rejection. Love never _____.

However, an authoritative parent/teacher whose eye is ever upon their child, who is

constantly scolding, thinking they are fulfilling their educative role in pardoning

nothing, will oppress their child, especially parents who place the weight of the family

concerns upon them; all of this only torments and discourages.

Fenelon

Fully LOVED, fully KNOWN, without FEAR of rejection. Love never _____.

However, an authoritative parent/teacher whose eye is ever upon their child, who is

constantly scolding, thinking they are fulfilling their educative role in pardoning

nothing, will oppress their child, especially parents who place the weight of the family

concerns upon them; all of this only torments and discourages.

Fenelon

Fully LOVED, fully KNOWN, without FEAR of rejection. Love never FAILS.

However, an authoritative parent/teacher whose eye is ever upon their child, who is

constantly scolding, thinking they are fulfilling their educative role in pardoning

nothing, will oppress their child, especially parents who place the weight of the family

concerns upon them; all of this only torments and discourages.

Fenelon

The cell phone or Does Grace Work?

Then there was the boy who asked questions. He asked so many questions that his father became

annoyed and thought of him as stupid, and other folks considered the child as foolish. As a seven year old, his teacher saw him as a dunce and requested that

he be removed from the school. But his mother believed in him and that God had a special plan for her son. So she began to homeschool her son and watched as he made rapid progress. At the age of nine, he was beginning to manifest an interest in

electricity and science. When he came to a difficult page he would ask his mother to explain their

meaning. Little “Al,” that’s what they called him as a child, never forgot the influence of his mother.

Years later when he became a famous inventor, he said, “My mother was the making of me. She was so true, so sure of me; and I felt that I had someone to live for, someone I

must not disappoint. I did not have my mother very long, but in that length of time, she cast over me an influence which has lasted all my

life. The good effect of her early teaching I can never lose. If it had not been for her

appreciation and her faith in me at a critical time in my experience, I should very likely

never have become an inventor.”Signed, Thomas Edison

“But above all things, do not let it appear to the child that you demand from him unnecessary submissions. Be careful not to fatigue him by an

indiscreet exactness.”

Fenelon

“Through Wisdom a house is built.” -Pro 24:3,4

“Prepare your work outside, make it fit for yourself in the field; and afterward build your

house.” Proverbs 24:27

“Do you see a man diligent in his work? He will stand before kings; He will not stand

before mean men.” -Proverbs 22:29

Last resort: Emulation and Jealousy. * This approach is only for the wise and gentle parent

Does Grace Really Work?

Dear Mr. Hamby,

…When our first child was born 7 years ago, I looked and looked for Christian teaching on discipline and raising godly children. I settled on a "first-time obedience" approach that was popular. My husband willingly went along with it, being as uncertain as I was about how to raise godly children.

I carried a lot of anger and resentment toward my children. I viewed their disobedience as a personal offense against me. I was exasperated by their lack of self-control and emotions. My oldest daughter is very strong-willed, and her temper tantrums were outrageous. The tantrums were not used as a tool to get attention in public or to manipulate me, but they were always directed at me (rarely her father)… Her behavior outside of the home was impeccable. It made it very hard to talk with anyone about this problem.

No one believed there WAS a problem, or passed it off as an isolated incident or a “stage.” And no one ever, ever challenged me to remove the log in my own eye. She did not sleep well at night since very early on. She was defiant and talked back a lot. My daughter never completed a chore without intervention from me. She was determined to have her say when corrected. It was an uphill battle all the time, and quite frankly I didn't enjoy her at all.

…I had found a discipline style that suited me early on...but I had not truly searched the scriptures to find how to reach my children’s hearts. While I thought I was following God's lead, I realize that I had my own agenda and it was a self-righteous one that didn't require me to change. I wasn't willing to consider that my convictions were selfish ones. I confessed my sin to the Lord and began to show more tenderness and self-control with my daughter. I still fell into the old ways often, though.

It wasn't until I listened to your tapes that I really heard some things to apply in my life…I could have put my name in your place. I was ALWAYS correcting my daughter, ALWAYS finding fault with her endeavors, ALWAYS saying her name in a way that implied disapproval or correction, ALWAYS fussing about undone chores. I had placed responsibility over relationship. I had a child who was fearful of my correction - that's the root of the sleep problem, and the reason for her unwillingness to try so many things. I was not casting out fear with love.

…I realized that little Sarah had very little chance of earning my approval. I stopped getting angry every time a simple chore was left undone. I stopped spanking. I stopped lecturing. I started cleaning her toys up outside without asking her to help. I went upstairs and made her bed in the morning. She spent a Saturday morning with me to run errands. I asked her what she wanted to do, and that's what we did. The errands got done another day. She loves flowers and gardens; I bought her a ton of seed packets and helped her plant them. She loves to paint; I started painting with her several times a week. I started hanging a butterfly on her closet door at night after she fell asleep, so if she woke up she would KNOW that I had kept my promise to check on her. I started hugging and kissing her intentionally.

In a matter of days, the most remarkable thing happened. I was doing some cleaning, and I asked my youngest to do a small chore, which she did willingly. Without my asking for help, Sarah set about doing chores—big chores that required a lot of effort on her part. She dusted, swept, and washed dishes. She straightened up and put things away properly. It was then I realized what a different child she had become. She sleeps better at night. She laughs more, and she is not as angry.

She takes offenses from her younger sister better. She handles disappointment with grace and not anger. She says “yes ma'am” and “no ma'am” consistently. She accepts my correction willingly and changes her behavior when necessary. She cleans up her outdoor toys without being told. She wants me to read to her now instead of just tolerating it. And best of all, she has started talking about the things that are in her heart, and she wants ME to hear them.

When I started trying to disciple Sarah the way Jesus would, she bloomed. She is a joy to be with, and I have lost my anger and impatience. When those feelings do try and creep to the surface I can label them, confess them, and deal with them before they control me.

…God allows us to remember our sins, not so we condemn ourselves repeatedly, but so we can show others what he has delivered us from. …Our God is a GREAT God.

Giving all diligence, add to you faith virtue (comes from the same Greek word for manliness or valor; moral excellence), and to virtue knowledge, and to knowledge self control, and to self control, endurance (cheerful, hopeful, patient, waiting), and endurance, godliness (Christ-like

character), and to godliness, brotherly kindness, and to brotherly kindness, love.

Two Journeys

Compulsory

Self Protective

Journey 1

Journey 2

Other Governed Existence(Problem Focus Approach)

Responsibility over Relationship

Christ Governed Existence(Person Focus Approach)

Relationship within Responsibility

Self Governing Existence

Christ Centered Existence

“… it is necessary to find out every means of making those things pleasing to the child which are

expected of him; and should you have anything distressing or difficult to propose, forget not to comfort him

with the assurance that a little trouble will be followed by unspeakable

satisfaction.” Fenelon

In the early years of education it is imperative that children are not discouraged with

repeated corrections and low grades. It is the responsibility of parents and teachers to help children to succeed and gain confidence in

their ability to think and learn. If a child is not lazy, and is working hard, though not able to

grasp the content, this child should never lose privileges or be made to feel that he is a failure. On the contrary, this child should be

rewarded for his effort.Fenelon

“Success is failureupon failure

with great enthusiasm.”

Theodore Roosevelt

Failures are stepping stones to success. Examples: Morse, Fulton, Lincoln, Bell, Carnegie, Longfellow,

John Wanamaker, Henry Ford, Wright Brothers, Edison.