WelcomeTo view material from this talk visit

www.sacap.edu.za/eventsLike our Facebook Page

Follow us on Twitter @SACAP #psychologyfest

How to Be Happy: The Fine Print

Getting in Our Own Way

• Can our ideas and expectations of what happiness is and how it can be attained actually form a hindrance to experiencing it?

Example Assumptions

Happiness just happens. I need to pursue happiness. If I can just x,y,z, then I will be happy. Happiness comes from within.

Perceptions: Discourse

http://emilycharlet.wordpress.com

http://carriescornerishere.blogspot.com

Perceptions: Discourse

Perceptions: Discourse

http://slob967.wordpress.com

Perceptions: Discourse

Happiness is….

“The meaning & the purpose of life, the whole aim & end of human existence” – Aristotle

A mental or emotional state of well-being characterized by positive or pleasant emotions ranging from contentment to intense joy –Modern Science

“When what you think, what you say and what you do are in harmony”– Mahatma Gandhi

Enter Positive Psychology

• Mainstream psychology has traditionally presented mental health as an absence of mental illness. Absence is different to presence. Mental health is so much more than an absence of symptoms.

Enter positive psychology with findings such as:

• Mindfulness meditation: bolsters our immune system, increases resilience & productivity.

• Thinking of others and cultivating empathy: can even help individuals with severe forms of mental illness lead a better life.

• Distinction: positive ≠ happy. Being happy is only one expression of being positive. You can be sad and be positive.

• Being positive is a perspective, it’s a way of being in the world.

Image:www.thehaapyproject.com

Positive Psychology: What is happiness?

Martin Seligman -3 broad types of happiness

• The Pleasant Life – fun, feelings of pleasure. (Problem: we are bad at predicting what will make us happy).

• The Good Life - finding ways to utilize our signature strengths (best talents), being good at something, engaging and feel connected, in flow (time stops, sense of self vanishes, deeply and effortlessly involved).

• Meaningful Life - talents & skills are used to serve a higher purpose, cause or community which benefits others.

Barbara Fredrickson & Steve Cole: the immune cells of people who reported “a sense of direction and meaning,” are strongest.

http://www.reinventingfabulous.com

Positive Psychology: What is happiness?

When is it pleasure you need and when is it satisfaction?

• Pleasure: what feels good in the moment.

• Satisfaction: what feels good afterwards.

Image: grassroots.org

Positive Psychology: Learned Optimism

Martin Seligman: Learned optimism (1968) (we will prevail in the end, despite difficulties) comes from explanatory styles:

• Pessimistic: Permanent, personal, pervasive• Optimistic: Temporary, impersonal (external), specific (local)

Changing the way we interpret situations: defeats are temporary, not my fault and only about this situation.

• Research shows that optimists have less illness and live about 8 years longer on average. These effects are not from just pasting on a happy face. Positivity must be grounded in reality. (Rath & Clifton, 2004)

• Negativity (thinking, emotions) increases your cortisol, you get sick easier (Rath & Clifton, 2004). It’s about thinking negatively less often, but not avoiding it or suppressing it. BE PRESENT!

www.theguardian.com

Happiness in Our Brain

Dr Richard Davidson (2012) f(MRI) technology: frontal lobes are involved in thought and emotion prefrontal cortex of our brains.

https://www.learnmyself.com

What does Research say?

• Genes, thinking patterns and to a lesser degree our circumstances.

• 50 % genetically determined, (Prof David Lykken, AukeTellegen -studying separated twins).

• Circumstances and environment contribute only about 10%.

o E.g. Prof Sonja Lyubomirsky: pervasive myth is that a desired change in lifestyle such as getting married or striking it rich will make us irrevocably happy. May cause happiness in the short term, yes.

http://www.business2community.com

What does Research say?

• Hedonic adaptation (Brickman, Coates, Janoff- Bulman,1978): we are remarkable at getting used to changes in our lives (good/bad). Basically means a certain amount of your happiness is determined by your brain looking at how well you're doing compared to “yesterday” e.g. R100 (take for granted).

• Also means that not reaching your dream may not make you that unhappy. Nothing is really as joy-producing or misery-inducing as we think it may be.

• Happiness is relative: it adjusts back to what scientists callour 'set-point'. Your happiness set-point is the amount of happiness your body is hardwired to experience.

• Moderation: June Gruber analysed health data and found that it is better to be a little happy over a long period of time than to experience erratic spikes in happiness.

What does Research say?

• Variability: What brings happiness is diverse – we all like different types of coffee, pasta, people etc.

• Sonja Lyubomirsky & Kristin Layous: not all research-approved happiness practices work for everyone all the time.

• Neuroplasticity: patterns of though rewire our brain over time. The more often we are happy, the stronger these neural pathways become.

What does Research say?

• E.g. Cultivating gratitude: Philip Watkins: It seems that the more grateful a person is, the less depressed they are - found that clinically depressed individuals showed significantly lower gratitude (nearly 50 % less ) than non-depressed controls. Gratitude visits, gratitude journal

• Saying “thanks” can make you happier, sustain your marriage through tough times, reduce envy and improve physical health.

• Altruism boosts our happiness levels

What does Research say?

Assumption: more choice is better. However, this comes with pressure and depends on our ability to spot the difference. Paralysis – find it difficult to chose and so put off making a choice.

• Self-blame: When there is only one option, the world is to blame. When there are lots of options, you only have yourself to blame and this can lead to depression.

• Regret & anticipated regret: alternatives can induce regret and reduce our satisfaction with our choice.

• Escalated expectations: even when results are good, we are dissatisfied. We have an imagined perfect alternative.

• Secret = lower your expectations.

“Satisfice”: Herbert A Simon. To make a choice that is satisfactory & sufficient to meet need, rather then being the absolute best of all possible options.

http://99u.com/

Barry Swartz on choice and happiness: Some choice is better than none, but more choice is not better than some.

Summary so Far

• Know when to have fun.

• Identify and utilize your signature strengths.

• Serve a higher purpose/meaning.

• Adopt an optimistic explanatory style (temporary, personal, specific).

• Be present. Don’t avoid the negative, nor suppress it. But don’t take it too seriously either.

• Remember hedonic adaptation: nothing is as joy producing or misery inducing as we may think.

• You have a “set- point” of happiness (hardwired), but thank goodness for neuroplasticity. E.g. practice gratitude, say thank you, help others.

• Manage your choices and your expectations

• NEXT: Having a healthy relationship to your thinking and emotional responses.

Live from Happiness, Not For It

Are we doing things in order to be happy?

Wellbeing is the essence of who you are.

• There is nothing you need to do or have in orderto be happy.

• Happiness is part of our innate healthy psychological functioning.

How?

http://www.wordsonimages.com/

Happiness Really Comes from the Inside

• There is what happens and then there is what we think about what happens.

• Cognitive Psychology: we all delete, distort & generalise information(and differently).

• We can change our experience of the world by changing how we see it. Our schemas/mental maps recreate the territory.

• Cognitive Psychology: Nothing on the outside may change in a situationbut everything can seem different.

• Happiness doesn’t necessarily depend on getting what you want.

• Rather, it stems from the stories we tell ourselves about reality.

“When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change”. - Max Planck

Don’t Believe Everything You Think

• Our story is the meaning we give to our experience of reality – we add the meaning good/bad.

• Something is a problem when we compare it to “how it used to be” or how we think “it will be one day”. We create a story of how things were/should be. Compare with others. We find the present lacking.

• Every emotion is a response to a thought, not to the world around us.

• Our story is just a story – Don’t believe everything you think!!!!

• Ben Zander: Rule No. 6

• John Milton: “the mind is its own place and in itself can make a heavenof hell and a hell of heaven”

5 Principles of Innate Psychological Functioning: Richard Carlson (1992)

• Thinking: our ability to think creates our psychological experience of life (voluntary).

• Moods: our own understanding that thinking is a voluntary function fluctuates from moment to moment, from day to day. These variances are called moods.

• Separate psychological realities: because we all think in a unique way, each of us lives in a separate psychological reality.

• Feelings: our feelings and emotions serve as a built in biofeedback mechanism that lets us know how we are doing from a psychological reality.

• The present moment: allows us to live at peak efficiency, without the distraction of negative thinking. The present moment us where we find peace and happiness.

Define for Yourself

Are we willing to let ourselves be happy or arewe postponing happiness?

• Some times when things are going well, we wait for the other shoe to drop and don’t actually live in the happiness of the moment. Give yourself permission!

What is average and what is extraordinary?

• The small stuff is usually the good stuff.• A series of average days doing an average

amount of what you love can amount to something rather extraordinary.

http://mythoughtsandmedotcom.wordpress.com

Summary

• Know when to have fun.

• Identify and utilize your signature strengths.

• Serve a higher purpose/meaning.

• Adopt an optimistic explanatory style (temporary, personal, specific).

• Be present. Don’t avoid the negative, nor suppress it. But don’t take it too seriously either.

• Remember hedonic adaptation: nothing is as joy producing or misery inducing as we may think.

• You have a “set- point” of happiness (hardwired), but thank goodness for neuroplasticity. E.g. practice gratitude, say thank you, help others.

• Manage your choices and your expectations

Summary

• Take your own thinking less seriously.

• Notice your moods. Every emotion is a response to a thought, not

to the world around us.

• Compare less.

• Give yourself permission to be fully happy NOW.

• Appreciate and value the small stuff.

http://forestwonderz.com/happiness-quotes

Thank You!

Thank youTo view material from this talk visit

www.sacap.edu.za/events

Like our Facebook Page

Follow us on Twitter @SACAP

#psychologyfest