Dealing with Difficult People in a Changing World

A Summary of the Article by Dr. Terry Paulson

Group 1

Talk to People Instead of About Them

Speak directly with the person you have a problem with

Avoiding problems make them worse Misunderstanding can be resolved

quickly by confronting the issue immediately

Do Not Avoid Conflict

Avoidance:• Lets the issue grow• Causes further problems• Causes pain and guilt for avoiding it

Focus on the Future

Do not get stuck in proving a conviction for past problems

Seek results, not revenge Both parties can continue to respect

one another by focusing on future problem solving

Deal with Issues, Not Personalities

Realize the right of others to have a different opinion

Do not personalize disagreements, you invite an escalating conflict

Don’t Avoid the Criticism of Change

Avoiding criticism hinders the process of change and causes resistance.

Opening a dialogue helps clarify any misunderstandings and promotes action.

Asking for specific suggestions are encouraged.

Know when to admit your faults.

Caring Enough to Confront all Equally and Fairly

Everyone should be treated equally and fairly in confronting a problem.

Avoid using excuses that inhibits people from confronting them openly.

Labeling people is an example that uses biases (race, gender, age etc.) to justify their logic.

Avoid Enemies

Polite indifference and negative interaction make enemies

In these relationships there are no winners

Look for the best in each person

Build Positive Bridges to Difficult People

Be sincere Maintain positive

contact and build trust

Use their opinions from their strengths

Being a bridge builder will earn you respect

Perspective

Evidence of effort to maintain perspective

“This too shall pass!” Exposure to other areas create options

for different teams and management Always have a future career plan in the

works

Self Reflection

If you act like a jerk, you’re a jerk Look in the mirror and make sure

you’re not the one being difficult