7 Biggest Divorce Mistakes

1. Assuming You Have to Litigate

A judgment dissolving your marriage IS required. But there are diverse paths one can take to that final hearing. Don’t assume that the only path to the courtroom is the one inside the courthouse. You can

Work out an agreement at the kitchen table Hire a mediator to help both of you work out the details Retain a cooperative lawyer to work out the details with your spouse Or with his cooperative lawyer

or Employ a collaborative team to help you both negotiate your divorce.

2. Emptying the Joint Accounts

Some lawyers encourage their clients to clean out the bank accounts, “before your spouse does it”

This is a declaration of war and can only ignite a catastrophic fire If you are truly worried that your spouse will do that

Find and copy your family’s most recent financial information Inventory and photograph your family’s valuables Then move 50% of the liquid funds into an individual account And don’t forget to meet with a financial planner, after

3. Talking Trash

You may feel you must vent about your problems with the ex If you do, it may well come back to bite you The only truly confidential exchange you have is with your lawyer NEVER trash him or her to your kids

It will hurt you in court, if you’re going there And it will certainly bite you back with the kids for years to come

If you must, vent in the journal your lawyer asked you to keep

4. Posting on Social Media

It’s hugely tempting to brag about your new life before you’re even divorced, to ensure that your ex knows that you’re over him or her

Don’t do it! Don’t post Details about the keg you finished all by yourself Comments about the one-night stands you’ve enjoyed Pictures of you with your new girlfriend or beau

Consider the famous folks who are now infamous idiots just because they had to hit “enter”

5. Filing False Charges

Telling the cops that your spouse hit you is not the right way to tell him or her you want a divorce or to get him out of the house

It’s a declaration of war, and your kids and bank accounts will suffer in the ensuing destruction

Instead Be brave; have the talk at the kitchen table Invite your spouse to coffee in a public place Ask family to help you have that talk, or Ask your attorney to help you have that talk

6. Not Getting a Second Opinion

A lawyer will explain the various options available for obtaining that final judgment dissolving your marriage

But lawyers are human They have biases They make mistakes

Always get at least one second opinion before choosing an attorney But once you do retain counsel, listen to her advice!

7. Not Hiring a Collaborative Lawyer

A collaborative divorce will Save you time Save you money Prevent emotional trauma to you and the ones you love Ensure results your family can live with Protect your relationships with the people you care about

Call Joryn Jenkins for more information about a win-win divorce