Compassion

Focused therapy

Session 5Compassionate Awareness

Cultivating Mindfulness

Layers:Cft builds in layers:

• Safe group space

• Understanding vs self-blame

• New layer: Mindful Awareness

Mindfulness:

If we are to work with our suffering, we must

be able to tolerate it, stay with it

Mindfulness allows us to pay attention to the

present moment (outside and inside our

brains)

We allow ourselves to just be with our

experience, to notice and observe without

judging, criticizing, or blaming

Mindful Awareness

Useful for people who are haunted by self-

critical thoughts

The problem is not that we have these

thoughts (most people do from time to time)

The problem comes when we ruminate on

them, rehearse them and believe them

Mindfulness

Mindfulness allows us to see thoughts and

feelings as mind objects instead of who we

are

Three Flower Pots

Imagine three flower pots:

Mindfulness

It doesn’t matter what you put in front of your

minds’ eye, it will always be you looking at it

The voice inside our head

Ever notice what happens in our minds during

a lull in conversation? When we’re alone?

The Voice What is this voice? It never stops talking, and 70-80 % of

what is says is negative

It gets really loud when we’re trying to sleep:

“Omigod, I forgot to call Fred, what is he going to think? I’ve got such a load tomorrow, I hate work, these kids are driving me crazy, maybe I’d be better off alone, I hate being alone, I’m going to be alone forever, what’s wrong with you? Get your act together, what if? What if? Some thing bad is going to happen, I just know it, I’m such an idiot, how could it not. It’s not fair, why do things have to be so unfair, I hate my life, what a disaster, my mother was right, I’ll never be anything, no wonder everyone leaves me… and on and on and on….

The Voice

Is this voice you?

Who is this voice?

This voice is not you

You are the one who is hearing it

Nothing it says is any more real than anything

else in your mind

(remember the three flowerpots)

Why does it talk?

The talking releases built up nervous, fearful

or desire-based energy.. Like a teakettle

whistling

When you are angry with someone, how

many times do you tell them off inside of your

head?

It talks because we are not okay inside and

talking releases stored energy

The Manic Roommate

Imagine you spend the day just listening to the voice

Your inner voice never stops chattering, observing, fortune-telling, criticizing. It changes its mind, is conflicted, jumps from one thing to another

Now imagine this a person sitting next to you on the couch, a roommate you take everywhere

The Manic Roommate

Image if you had to listen to the incessant,

neurotic, conflicting chatter all day from a real

person

How long would we last?

Would we pay this person money to advise us

on finances, relationships, our future?

The Maniac Roommate

Why do we give it all of our attention, and

believe every word it says?

Have we ever bothered to check it’s

credentials?

How often is it right/wrong?

Where will we put our attention?

Attention Practice

Attention is like the spotlight of the mind

Let’s practice..

Series of words

When you hear the word, direct your attention

to where the word indicates

So if I say “left elbow” direct your attention to

your left elbow….

Let’s discuss…

How quickly could you shift your attention was

is fast or slow?

Notice how you could switch from something

very narrow, like your elbow to something

very broad like world peace

Mindfulness Practice

Mindful check-in

Why?

Develop the habit of bringing attention to body experiences, get used to noticing

Notice without judging

Easy practice to transfer to life in general

Thinking vs observing

Thinking about your feet vs observing your feet

Practice: Tactile anchor point

Choose a stone

Just notice qualities.. Mindfulness practice pg

114 green book

Benefits of Mindful Practice

Mindfulness can grow parts of the brain that are involved with feelings of self-soothing and emotional regulation

After 8 weeks of practice the amygdala (or fear center) shrinks

Brain registers less physical pain (source: Scientific American Website)

Develops ability to pause and choose action, instead of gut reacting

How Mindfulness affects the

brain:

Video Sara Lazar, Harvard Universtiy

8 weeks, 30-40 mins per day of Meditation

causes an increase in areas of:

Thinking, planning and emotional control

Compassion and understanding

And a decrease in: fear and anxiety

Summary and Homework:

Mindfulness allows us to observe without judgment, developing compassion

It allows us to tolerate and work with difficult emotions

It sets the stage for the rest of the CFT program, cultivating compassionate strengths

Homework Practice for two mins per day (set timer) and record reaction in journal