King of the GoveWith apologies to Roger Miller…

Free schools for sale or rent,

Fields to flog – fifty pence.

My policy’s a mess…

You don’t need no QTS!

Ah but… two hours with Laws and Truss

Makes the… teachers of the country cuss!

I’m a man who makes teens go gre-en;

King of the Gove.

Watch Stephen Twigg kow-tow…

Opposition? Don’t know how!

The Ebacc’s coming soon,

3 hour ‘xams at the end of June… you’ll do

Maths ‘til your 35

School attendance takes a dive! If our

PISA score is pristine, I’m

King of the Gove.

Clocks back to ‘53…

Suck my ideology!

Wilshaw is my lap-dog;

OFSTED lurking in the fog… ah but

Twelve hours of marking work

And you almost can forget the berk…

Until… Aarrgh! He’s back on TV-ee!

King of the Gove.

See my apology to my

French teacher (his name’s Danny)?

I was a clever dick… now I

Decided not to do a picture for

this bit

Make the whole profession sick!

And so, you say it’s time I went;

#govemustgo is your lament. But I

Have some more decrees! I’m

King of the Gove!