4 WAYS TO BOOST YOUR CHILD’S CONFIDENCE

The New Foundation says children will often feel outdone by their

friends and classmates. However, you can bolster your child’s confidence with these focus-

changing strategies.

Be Realistic

Telling your savvy school-age child that he can play the piano as well as the class Mozart isn’t going to fly if it isn’t true. And dismissing the observation—“Who cares if Nick is better at the piano?”—won’t make him feel any more. Acknowledge his feelings with a simple statement: “You noticed that Nick can read music, and you’d like to be able to do that too, right?” Then help him understand how. Let your child decide if mastering a specific task and putting in the required effort is important to him (or whether he’d be equally happy playing “Chopsticks”).

Dig Deeper

If your child comes home from school upset, saying, “Kerry is prettier than I am,” find out what’s really behind the statement. Five- and 6-year-olds often jump to the wrong conclusion, mistaking a teacher’s compliment to another student as a statement of fact. Still, her sense that other kids are “better” could indicate an underlying problem. “If you’re concerned, talk to your child’s teacher to make sure that everything’s fine, academically and socially,” Dr. Sileo suggests.

Watch Your Words

Make sure that you’re not the one accidentally setting the comparisons in motion,. Encouraging himto practice tying his shoe laces is a good thing, but pushing him too hard or bringing up the fact at the dinner table that his friends already know how to tie double knots can make him think in terms of “better” and “worse” and come to the conclusion that he is inferior to his peers. “Instead, focus on supporting his interests, praising him on both his efforts and his mastery,” Dr. Walco says.

Focus on Personal Growth

Teach your child that the most important comparison isn’t between her and her best friend (or her classmate or big sister) but the person she was in the past. “Kids have to learn to measure themselves against themselves”. Point out how much she has improved over a short period of time: “Remember last year, when you couldn’t read at all? Look how far you’ve come in just one year!” Then reassure her that, by trying hard and doing her best, she’ll continue to get better.

THE NEW FOUNDATION Article By Leslie Garisto Pfaff from Parents Magazine

For more helpful tips and advice, please contact The New Foundation.