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Why it's challenging to develop emotionally-intelligent leadership in organisations. With some quotes from Daniel Goleman's book 'Focus' looking at the latest thinking in emotional intelligence
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The 10 challenges of developing emotionally-intelligent leadership in
organisations
Helen Caton-Hughes, MD, The Forton Group
With quotes from
‘Focus’ By Daniel Goleman
3 types of empathy
• Cognitive/Emotional Empathy– Recognising and resonating with feelings
• Sympathy– Concern for others’ welfare
• Empathic Concern– We care about people– We are willing to help if needed
Cognitive Empathy
• Infer what’s going on in someone else’s mind
• Understand another person’s ways of seeing and thinking
• Reflects language that fits their way of understanding
Empathy requires an inquisitive nature• An inquisitive nature feeds cognitive empathy
– Why they think what they think– Why they do what they do– Learning - what worked/didn’t work
Unconscious Physical
Synchrony
“When people listen to someone telling a story, the brains of the listeners become intimately coupled with that of the story
teller.”• This, in turn, generates good feeling• Such shared focus puts the brain in the
best mode for learning
Psychological vs. Physical empathy
• It takes time to tell the psychological and moral dimensions of a situation
• It takes longer than empathy around physical issues
Where we focus matters• “Emotional empathy grows stronger if we
attend to the intensity of pain.”• The more distracted we are, the less we can
exhibit attunement and caring
TEN CHALLENGES OF INTRODUCING EI LEADERSHIP COMPETENCES
Application in the field of leadership
Challenge #1: Every organisation is a
complex system. Where the physical
structures are may be clear but how people fit
in may be less clear. It’s the network of
people that makes – and changes – the
system
HR Finance
IT Marketing
Operations Customers
Shareholders
Stakeholders
Challenge #2: Emotional Intelligence (EI) is a set of invisible
competences that help us work together better in the system. These competences
demand practice – not just understanding. When used well, we create, learn and think clearly – providing better, more enduring,
solutions – for everyone.
Challenge #3: It seems easier to focus on visible
actions and outcomes than invisible skills and competences
Leaders need take a whole systems overview and look at systems’
lifecycles – not just the short term. This, in itself, takes emotional
resilience.
Challenge #4
Pareto PrincipleLeaders need to select from many
complex options, the top 3 or 4 priorities that will have the greatest positive
impactsOf which one is investing in emotionally-
intelligent leaders
Challenge #5
To build better emotional intelligence in leaders, we need senior people to
appreciate EI competences.This requires their attention, and
willingness to invest time & money, in these invisible competences
Challenge #6
Challenge #7
When leaders talk about developing leadership competences, they need to include themselves – but may prefer to talk about the development needs of others.
Negative drivers (‘burning platforms speeches’) are poor
motivators – but seem easy and immediate.
Challenge #8
“We’re better motivated by positive emotions: it feels more
meaningful and the urge to act lasts longer”
Leadership is no longer the role of a single ‘hero leader’
“Everything we’re doing is part of the system. There is no ‘Archimedean point’ where we’re
either failing, or, if we pull harder, we’re going to succeed.”
(Paul Hawken)
Challenge #9
“Attentional Anaesthetic”
- Temporal-Parietal Junction (TPJ)
Protects focus by walling off emotions along with other distractions and helps keep a distance between oneself and others
• Problem/solution mode
• Understands the person’s perspective intellectually
• ‘Head to heart’ • Not ‘heart to heart’
‘sociopaths’
• “tell themselves about emotions, but don’t feel them directly”
• Leaves them focusing on the experience at hand• Blinds them to consequences
The TPJ Risk
“The powerful tend to tune out the powerless”
Leaders need to understand that Emotional Intelligence is a ‘whole
system’, positive and enduring solution. An investment for now &
the long term
Challenge #10conclusion
The new leadership is organisation-wide
• Every team member is part of the whole system
• Everyone needs to step up, speak up, and contribute their skills and strengths
Developing Emotional Intelligence
Awareness Management
Self Self-Awareness Self-Management
Other(s) Social Awareness
Relationship Management
Ken Wilbur’s Whole System Model
Leadership Coaching Skills
• Support the development of emotionally-intelligent leaders
• Empower people to be more personally successful and to enable success in others
• Enable people to be more coach-like in their own leadership
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