Speaking to Parents: Five Things Every Parent NEEDS to know
And a Good Review for Everyone Working with the Millennial Cohort of Students
Dori Hutchinson Sc.D. and Margaret Ross M.D.ACHA 2012
Sending a Child to College
• Developmental milestone for child AND parent; important time developmentally
• Vivid memories of one’s own experience• Then….and now• 2012 at BU• Unbroken (Hillenbrand)
What’s the Same?
• Insecurities• Pressure• Coming of age rituals• Vulnerability to mental health issues• Developmental issues• Alcohol
What’s Different?
Long ago, in a galaxy far, far away….
What’s Different?
• Pace and pressure• Social media and technology• Debate about curriculum and majors• Magnitude of debt• Millennials: characteristics• Laws: HIPAA, FERPA, confidentiality,
landmark cases• Americans with Disabilities Act
Pace and Pressure
Social Media and Technology
Curriculum and Majors
Magnitude of Debt
Characteristics of Millennials
Laws: HIPAA, FERPA, ADA, cases
Americans with Disabilities Act
The Millennials: The “ME Generation”
• Millennials Go To College (Howe and Strauss)1
• Whassup? A Glimpse into the Attitudes and Beliefs of the Millennial Generation (Sandfort and Haworth)2
• 1© 2003 American Association of Collegiate Registrars and Admissions Offices (AACRAO) and Life Course Associates
• Executive Summary prepared by Steve Eubanks, (originally for distribution at Azusa Pacific University; revised for general release 8/06)
• 2002, Sandfort School of the Art Institute of Chicago; Haworth at Loyola University Chicago
The “Millennials”
• Generation born 1982- 2002• Predicted: Optimistic, team oriented, high
achieving, rule following
The “Millennials”
• “Correcting for the Baby Boomers’ narcissism, impatience, iconoclasm, and focus on talk over action….”
• Upbeat, achieving, team playing, civic minded• ……HMMMMM
• These aren’t the students I’m seeing
The “Millennials”
• Emergence of “helicopter parenting”• High emphasis on childhood• It’s all about ME• Decrease in unstructured free time—more
school, work, visiting non custodial parent, etc.
Seven Core Traits of “Millennials”:
• Special• Sheltered• Confident• Team-Oriented• Conventional• Pressured• Achieving• “Each with its own shadow side….”
www.bu.edu/mentalhealth
Attitudes and Beliefs
• Link between education and income: direct• Belief that they need to go to college in order
to get ahead, make money• Parents reinforce the need to do well in
college to make a good living; pressure on students
Attitudes and Beliefs
• Disappointment in the political system leading to cynicism and disillusionment
• BUT…• “We’ve been told our whole lives we are going
to have to be the ones who fix the country.”• Along with the cynicism, an increase in
volunteerism and community service
Attitudes and Beliefs
• “Cautiously optimistic” about the future, barriers to be overcome
• Anxiety about how technology will impact their future, about global conflict
• Since the economic crash in 2008, more anxiety about money.
2008 and Beyond
• Economic crash, hitting worldwide, but unequally, derailed many of these predicted descriptors of this generation
• Internationals as an increasing percent of the makeup of the American university
• What are we seeing in our Millennial students?
The Information Age Mindset3
• Computers aren’t technology; they are an assumed part of life
• The Internet is better than TV• Multitasking is a way of life• Staying connected is essential: FACEBOOK • There is zero tolerance for delays
• 3Frand, Jason; Educause Review 35, No. 5 (Sept-Oct. 2000); 15-24, in Boomers and Gen-Xers and Millennials; Understanding the NEW Students by Diana Oblinger Educause July-August 2003
BU Secret
Time for a Short Break
Getting to the Five Things
The Five Things for Parents and Mental Health Professionals to Know• Helicopter parenting, technology and stress
hardiness• Americans with Disabilities Act and what this
means for students in college• Changing demography of student body and
impact on education and career paths• FERPA and what it means for you and your
student• What can one hope to find at Student Health
Services? HOW to get it?
I. Helicopter Parenting
Then• DAL as case example
– Expectation of autonomy– Separation and Individuation– Individualism– Confidence
Now
Resiliency? Autonomy?
Then: Parents• Baby Boomers, “hippies”• Economic boom• “The ‘60’s”• VietNam War, activism• Don’t trust anyone over 30• LSD, tune out, drop out
Now: Students• Millennials, conformity• Post economic downturn• ???? What era is this?• Iraq and Afghanistan,
political torpor• Closeness with parents,
trust in adults, dependency• Alcohol, MJ, always
connected but mainly through Facebook/virtual
Stress Hardiness
• Helping Parents Help their Children• Using Technology Appropriately• Conveying Confidence• Passing on Life Skills• Techniques and Strategies for Coping• Empathy as a Coping Skill and Suicide
Prevention Strategy (Dori Hutchinson)
Technology
Technology: Double Edged Sword
• The Facebook Generation= The Millennials• Being connected 24/7, while feeling isolated• Pseudo-communication and connection• Being facile with technology, but having little
experience with real life skills• Unintended consequence: more screen time,
less exercise, less coping
II. The ADA and What it Means
• More opportunity for everyone to attend • Need for students to advocate for themselves• More “hidden disabilities” as well as apparent
on campus• What parents need to know: ADHD as
example
III. Changing Demographics
• Who goes to college– Idea that income tied to education– Change from last generation– Competition for grades, jobs– International population– Diversity– Scholarships
Career Paths
• What is a smart person to do?• Doctor? Lawyer? Business? High tech?• Greater choice, fewer openings• “Soaring expectations, crushing realities”
(Twenge, J. 2006; Generation ME. Why Today’s Young Americans Are More Confident, Assertive, Entitled, and More Miserable than Ever Before. Free Press, Simon and Schuster Inc.)
IV. FERPA, HIPAA and high profile cases
• What parents need to know• What school administrators and professors
need to know• What students need to know• What college health and mental health
professionals NEED TO KNOW
Virginia Tech 2007
MIT
V. Crucial Parental Communication
• HOW:– Websites– Admissions and Orientation– Deans Office– Student Health Services and Mental Health– Advising System
• WHEN:• WHEN NOT:
WHEN:
• Major eating issues• Major health concerns• Depression, suicidality• Withdrawal from classes• Crime, victimization• Good things too-- celebrations, birthdays,
Commencement
WHEN NOT:
• Bad grade• Worry about test• Roommate issues (minor)• Anger about something trivial• Library fines…. A true story
Summary: Role of Parent
• “Your job is not done.”• Margaret Mahler: Separation-Individuation as
“Love affair with the world”• Eriksonian concepts: each stage of life with a
developmental task• Rite of passage for child and parent• Success: Your child grows up and leaves you
in the dust.
The Importance of Listening
• BU Today ZB It Gets Better
Thank [email protected] RossBU Behavioral [email protected] HutchinsonBU Center for Psychiatric Rehabilitation