Inglourious Betches
By
Alex Larry & Laura Walker
Based on:
Quentin Tarantino’s Inglourious Basterds
EXT. DAIRY FARM-DAY
A quaint dairy farm resting in the countryside of Nancy,
France, to the French this area is known as cow country.
A SUBTITLE appears in the sky above the farmhouse and it
reads as such:
CHAPTER ONE
"ONCE UPON ANOTHER TIME IN...
NAZI-OCCUPIED FRANCE"
This SUBTITLE disappears to be replaced by yet another:
"1941
One year into the German
occupation of France"
We focus more upon the farmhouse. There outside it is its
bull of an owner, FRENCH FARMER.
He stands with an axe in hand before a stump. At his feet
and about the base of the stump is a pile of chopped wood.
As he huffs off one chore of the day, he stares fixed on
perhaps nothing, but his face says otherwise.
FRENCH FARMER’S P.O.V.
A female NAZI OFFICER with a black leather attache case
approaches.
She yells to the farmer in FRENCH, SUBTITLED IN ENGLISH:
NAZI OFFICER
Are you Monsieur Perrier LaPadite?
FARMER
I am Perrier LaPadite.
The female officer takes long strides to close the distance
between them and says with a smile on her face, continuing
to speak in French:
NAZI OFFICER
It is a pleasure to meet you,
Monsieur LaPadite. I am Lieutenant
Colonel Hannelore Landon of the
S.S.
(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 2.
LTC. HANNELORE LANDON offers the French farmer, PERRIER
LAPADITE, her hand. The Frenchman takes the Germanic
woman’s hand in his and shakes it.
PERRIER
How may I help you?
LTC. HANNELORE
I was rather hoping you could
welcome me into your lovely home
for a polite discussion.
CUT TO
INT. LAPADITE FARMHOUSE-DAY
The door to the farmhouse swings open, and farmer gestures
in the manner of ladies first for the S.S. Lt.
colonel. Smiling in gratitude, the Germanic woman passes
the threshold.
LTC. Landon immediately begins to scan around the small
kitchen. The farmer enters behind her, closing the door.
LTC. Landon spins about on her heels taking the farmer off
guard.
LTC. HANNELORE
I was told you had daughters,
Monsieur LaPadite, is that correct?
Recovering from the sudden face-to-face he answers:
PERRIER
Yes, however they are out helping a
neighbor at the moment.
LTC. HANNELORE
All three of them?
PERRIER
(beat)
Oui.
LTC. HANNELORE
Pity, not a one to stay and help
papa?
(beat)
Oh well, it is for the best. What
we have to discuss must be
discussed in private.
(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 3.
LTC. Landon continues over to the kitchen table. She stands
by one of the chairs and settles her attache case on the
table.
She clearly though is expecting LaPadite to pull out the
chair.
LTC. HANNELORE
Monsieur LaPadite, please, join me
at your table.
LaPadite comes over hesitantly. Before he sits down, he
pulls out the chair for the Lt. colonel.
LTC. HANNELORE
Merci.
(sits down)
Now let us have this little
discussion, shall we?
LaPadite takes a seat opposite LTC. Hannelore.
LTC. HANNELORE
(CON’T)
But-before I explain my being
here-may I ask, do you speak
English as well as your neighbors
claim?
PERRIER
(beat)
Oui...
LTC. HANNELORE
Excellent, I just so happen too as
well. May we switch this
conversation to English then? The
extent of my French having been
exhausted, I simply refuse to speak
it so poorly, let alone in the home
of a Frenchman.
PERRIER
Certainly.
The remainder of the conversation is in ENGLISH:
LTC. HANNELORE
I am perfectly aware of you and
your family, Monsieur LaPadite, but
are you even aware of my existence?
(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 4.
PERRIER
Yes.
LTC. HANNELORE
Interesting. Now tell me, how is it
that you are aware? When to be
honest the outside world would
hardly know of any female connected
in some way with the National
Socialist Party unless her name be
Eva.
PERRIER
(beat)
Well, the man whose command we’ve
come to understand you are under
is-
LTC. HANNELORE
Preceded by his reputation? Sadly,
that is the case of the people of
France knowing of me as well. The
handmaiden to the Jew Hunter is
quite a notable and duty bound
title. However, it is not the name
I often hear uttered about myself-
when of course I am the topic of
gossip.
The S.S. Lt. colonel smiles.
LTC. HANNELORE
I digress though. We have more
important matters to attend
to. And I would not be honoring my
role set here in France if I were
to keep us absorbed in the gender
issues of notability in today’s
world.
LTC. Landon begins to take out items from her attache case:
fountain pen, ink well, papers, etc.
PERRIER
I don’t want to seem rude, but the
meaning of your visit, welcomed as
it is, is mysterious to
me. Several months ago our home
had been searched by the Germans.
Nevertheless attentive to his concern, she replies with what
could be said as polite hostility.
(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 5.
LTC. HANNELORE
Yes, well, that was-what did you
say? Several months ago? When to
be more exact, it has been seven
months to the date and to be frank-
this is now. Understand, a lot can
occur in a span of seven months,
Monsieur LaPadite.
PERRIER
Yes, I understand...forgive me.
LTC. HANNELORE
No, no, it’s quite alright. It is
only sensible to question. If you
weren’t to question, I’d have to
question about your claim as a
human being. But to alleviate your
worries, this is merely a routine
follow-up to check in with you. A
call to bring relief not dread I
promise you.
LaPadite nods, smiling- half-heartedly. He asks then:
PERRIER
May I redeem myself further as a
host by wondering whether you care
for a drink- wine perhaps?
LTC. HANNELORE
(graciously)
Oh yes, please. But I must decline
the wine, and bother you possibly
for a glass of milk? This being a
dairy farm, I would expect it the
main beverage on hand.
PERRIER
Absolutely, it is no trouble.
She beams in gratitude and proceeds to handle the papers
before her.
He stands to retrieve the milk from within an icebox. As
this happens, a BLACK OUT occurs.
6.
INT. LAPADITE FARMHOUSE-MOMENTS LATER
FADE UP
BLACK AND WHITE
The two are still at the table. The Lt. colonel is jotting
something down. An empty glass sits on the table. LaPadite
is puffing away on a pipe, waiting.
LTC. HANNELORE
Alright then.
(sets her pen down)
I believe I’ve gathered all I came
for. I am most thankful for your
willingness to help in this
process, Monsieur LaPadite.
PERRIER
You’re welcome, Lt. colonel.
She is found smiling as she collects her things.
The Lt. colonel suddenly inquires:
LTC. HANNELORE
Monsieur LaPadite, before I leave,
may I ask for your permission to
allow me one of my personal
vices? You may or may not have
heard that the Fuhrer is not at all
too keen on women smoking?
PERRIER
No, I don’t believe I have, but by
all means.
LTC. HANNELORE
Ah, thank you. I pray that this
may be our little secret, no?
(touches his hand)
After he agrees with a nod, she reaches within her attache
case.
Landon pulls out a long-stemmed cigarette holder and a pack
of smokes, setting one after the other on the table.
She places one cigarette at the respective end and puts the
other to her mouth. As the holder flounders about between
her lips, she searches for a lighter in her case.
LaPadite obliges then with a lit match.
(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 7.
LTC. HANNELORE
(puffs)
Again thank you.
(puffs once more)
Now, I must admit, my curiosity
getting the best of me- do you
happen to know the other name I
have been given? Really, I should
say a name that has been
resurrected from an avocation
previous my secretarial profession?
PERRIER
I’m afraid I pay little attention
to such things that may be part of
rumor.
LTC. HANNELORE
My dear Monsieur LaPadite, for
being the father of three young
women, you should know better than
to assume that the fairer sex has
no interest in rumors. So tell me,
what things have been able to peek
your attention then?
PERRIER
I- please keep in mind, this is
just rumors- have heard that you
were once a head guard at a labor
camp...
LTC. HANNELORE
Go on.
PERRIER
(apprehensive)
That, well, it was during your time
there that most began to refer you
to as...the She-wolf of the S.S.
Landon laughs at his trepidation in repeating it.
LTC. HANNELORE
You must understand it wasn’t
because of perversity that it was
given to me. Quite the contrary,
it was due to my tendencies to
dominate over and my acts of
insubordination to the orders of
men of lower rank- and higher
rank. And there was the other
issue of my treatment of the Jews
that attempted ever to escape...
(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 8.
(exhales a reminiscent cloud
of smoke)
Oh, well, past is in the past and
we must look to the future.
Just then she stands and pulling out the smoldering
cigarette from the holder.
LTC. HANNELORE
(CON’T)
And with that being said, I will
hope that we never meet again
Monsieur LaPadite.
(puts out cigarette on table)
I mean that may it be in better
times if ever there be another
meeting.
PERRIER
(stands)
No, I agree- only in better times
than these now.
The Lt. colonel extends a hand of farewell. LaPadite
accepts it as before.
With her attache case in hand, LaPadite goes to escort her
out. And just like before, she turns abruptly on her heels
to face him.
LTC. HANNELORE
I hate to leave on a sour note, but
let it be known, Monsieur LaPadite
that- if there turns out to any
irregularities with you and your
family with your stand on the Jews
in the future of this war- I have
no doubts that the next visit won’t
be as cordial as this.
She pulls a handkerchief from her blazer pocket. As she
gently sneezes into the handkerchief, a light thud is heard
O.S.
It seems the Lt. colonel’s lighter has reappeared, having
been in her blazer pocket.
LaPadite begins to bend down to get it when she stops
him. The Lt. colonel bends at the knees to reach the
lighter.
(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 9.
LTC. HANNELORE
How silly of me, I can be so
terribly forgetful sometimes. But
it seems my allergies made sure to
remind me of my misplacing.
While she picks it up, UNDERNEATH THE FLOORBOARDS a Jewish
family can be seen in the grips of fear and anticipation for
the She-wolf’s leave.
The Lt. colonel lingers, however, in her crouched position.
Her eyes are staring straight down between the floorboards.
The youngest child of this poor family, a BOY, is staring
right back at her.
A look of terror and a malevolent smirk are exchanged.
The Lt. colonel straightens up then, smirk replaced by kind
smile. She flashes the lighter to the farmer, before
tucking it away into her attache case.
LTC. HANNELORE
Monsieur LaPadite, I thank you for
your generosity, and bid you adieu.
CUT TO
EXT. DAIRY FARM- CONTINUOUS
LaPadite can be seen standing in the doorway of his
home. The Lt. colonel is seen retreating away towards the
CAMERA until O.S.
FADE TO BLACK
INT. VICHY-BASED S.S. OFFICE-DAY
FADE UP
A S.S. office; it is simple and unusually bright with white
walls and dark wood interior. The door, however, into which
one would enter this office is the focus.
A SUBTITLE appears on the door:
The Office of Col. Hans Landa...
a.k.a. the Jew Hunter.
(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 10.
SUBTITLE disappears. PULLING OUT, the view rests OVER THE
SHOULDER of COL. HANS LANDA, who remains obscured.
In this OS, we see Lt. colonel Hannelore Landon seated
before him. (The conversation is in GERMAN, SUBTITLED IN
ENGLISH:)
LTC. HANNELORE
I hope I haven’t appeared to have
been usurping your position in
anyway, herr Colonel. I only felt
that the situation needed a
different type of intuition- and
a less hostile invasiveness-
A hand raises to silence her.
COL. HANS LANDA
I completely understand.
(beat)
But the fact remains that you went
beyond what is expected of
you. And this intuition, you speak
of- no doubt, women’s intuition-
however helpful you believe you
were being with this insight,
doesn’t change the other fact of
the matter. Where is your evidence
of the LaPadite family sheltering
Jews?
LTC. HANNELORE
Herr Colonel-
His hand silences her again.
COL. HANS LANDA
I am not calling you a liar, Lt.
colonel. I am simply asking a
question and all I wish is for you
to answer it.
LTC. HANNELORE
(beat)
My evidence, herr Colonel, is my
word. People are willing to go on
less than that for murder, and
seeing as how that is precisely
what we are doing to the Jews I see
no reason why you cannot accept
that.
(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 11.
COL. HANS LANDA
Oh, I am very capable of accepting
that. Others though- not so much
and you know this well.
(lets that sink in)
Now, as far as I am concerned this
conversation is over for the time
being- that is unless you have
something else you want to share
with me? Something more tangible?
LTC. HANNELORE
(beat)
No, herr Colonel...
FADE TO BLACK
EXT. LAPADITE DAIRY FARM-DAY
FADE UP
SUBTITLE appears:
LAPADITE FARM...
TWO MONTHS LATER
SUBTITLE disappears.
FADE UP
One of the daughters of LaPadite is putting the laundry out
to dry on the clothesline. As she hangs a white bedsheet,
she shears a noise. Moving the sheet aside, she sees:
DAUGHTER’S POV
A Nazi town car convertible, with two little Nazi flags
attached to the hood, Nazi solider behind its wheel, an
officer alone in the backseat, following two other Nazi
soldiers on motorcycles, are coming up over the hill on the
country road towards the LaPadite farm.
FADE TO BLACK
INT. MESS HALL- DAY
FADE UP
CHAPTER TITLE appears:
CHAPTER TWO
(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 12.
"INGLOURIOUS BETCHES"
FADE UP
A group of misfit ARMY NURSES file into a mess hall.
All are silent excluding STAFF SGT. DONNA DANN, who is
grumbling to herself about "Yankees" as she ushers the women
in.
LT. ADELAIDE RAY stares at each woman as she is seated at a
table, looking elegant in her Army Nurse Corps uniform.
Sgt. Donna breaks out into her Virginian tongue:
SGT. DONNA
Right now ladies, why don’t y’all
take a seat.
Each woman sits down at the table with cups of tea already
placed before them.
Donna sits next to her lieutenant.
Adelaide smiles slightly and begins to speak in her own
Southern accent of Tennessee:
LT. ADELAIDE
Afternoon ladies
(stirs sugar cubes into her
tea)
My name is Lieutenant Adelaide Ray.
FREEZE FRAME on Adelaide. Her NAME is plastered across the
screen as NARRATOR gives a small background, snazzy theme
music accompany.
FRAME CONTINUES.
LT. ADELAIDE
(CON’T)
Y’all are gathered here today for a
common purpose ’cause each of y’all
has somethin’ in common with the
other.
CPL. WILHELMINA
(German accent)
What, may I inquire, is that?
Some of the women fidget uncomfortably at the sound of the
Germanic speech.
Wilhelmina takes a sip of her tea, ignoring it.
(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 13.
LT. ADELAIDE
I’m glad you asked that!
Lt. Ray lays down her spoon upon the small saucer which her
cup was placed.
LT. ADELAIDE
(CON’T)
Each of ya is connected to Jewish
heritage in one way or
another. Whether it be your
husbands or your granddaddies.
(glances at Donna)
Or like Donna here, you were
adopted into it. The point is,
y’all are Jewish, American, and
women.
PFC. MICHELLE
Excuse me, but what does being
Jewish have anything to do
with...well anything?
LT. ADELAIDE
Well, I need me some soldiers.
(beat)
They told me I could round up eight
and only eight.
(becomes agitated a bit)
Those crazy men (bastards) expect
me to round up eight nurses to help
with the war.
PFC. ANDREA
So, we’d be nurses, not soldiers?
PFC. SIMONE
If we’re only nurses, what does it
matter that we’re Jewish?
LT. ADELAIDE
(growing frustrated)
No, no. That’s just what they
thought I was gonna do. But I set
them straight. I told them that we
women have desire to be on the
battlefield just as much as the men
do. Of course they didn’t listen,
but I got in contact with the
French and they are more than happy
to accommodate our needs for
battle. And so, I call on you
ladies. You, who have personal
(MORE)
(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 14.
LT. ADELAIDE (cont’d)grudges against the Nazi scum that
is terrorizing France and all of
Europe.
PFC. SADIE
(innocently)
What do you mean by battle?
LT. ADELAIDE
I mean, we will be shipped off to
France to fight Nazis. And I mean,
really fight them. We won’t be
teaching them manners or reporting
them to the men so that they can
take the glory and satisfaction of
winning this war.
(gets enthusiastic)
We will be getting our own hands
dirty by disguising ourselves
anyway we can. There ain’t nuthin’
sweeter than a woman and men are
too (goddamn) stupid to resist
their carnal desires. Thus we must
be willing to do ANYTHING to bring
these monsters down!
She takes a breather to calm down her roused blood lust.
LT. ADELAIDE
(CON’T)
We will be cruel to the German. We
will lure them in with our charm
and we will rip their manhood from
them.
Sgt. Donna can be seen smiling morbidly, while making a
snipping gesture with her fingers.
We can see each woman now: one after the other is inspired
to say in the least.
LT. ADELAIDE
I expect-nay, I DEMAND that each
and every one of you not only kill
but destroy 100 Nazis. And they
will fear us more than that
ridiculous guerrilla platoon they
call the Basterds. Yes, we’ve all
heard of them, and how they scalp
the Nazis they kill with Aldo the
Apache as their leader. That
Jewish-American team of me seems to
(MORE)
(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 15.
LT. ADELAIDE (cont’d)
think they can win this war with
their so called cruelty.
(laughs mockingly)
They ain’t cruel! And they sure as
hell ain’t scary! We can be nasty
and horrible. We will show them
not to underestimate women.
PFC. SADIE
What do you mean exactly?
Camera sets itself on Donna, she is about to speak, and as
she does the camera watches each woman share looks of horror
to these words:
SGT. DONNA
What she means is, we gonn’ scare
them like babies and make ’em wish
they ain’t ne’er bin born. We
gonn’ rip them Nazis a new one!
The camera stops on Donna again as she finishes up with a
malicious smile.
CUT TO
INT. BERCHTESGADEN-DAY
HITLER
NEIN, NEIN, NEIN, NEIN, NEIN, NEIN,
NEIN! First, there’s this Bear Jew
beating my men with a baseball bat
and now this-this Black Mama?!
(flushed with anger)
These Americans are disgracing my
army! They send these-these
BASTERDS! And now, they mock us
with WOMEN?!
He violently shakes his head. Slamming his hand on the
table, he startles two generals forced to listen to this
tantrum.
HITLER
I hear of these women tricking my
men and killing them, and you tell
me that is not just soldier’s
gossip?! There are women running
around and beating my soldiers with
a-a frying pan?!
(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 16.
The generals look to each other in apprehension. They are
honestly just waiting for Hitler to explode.
HITLER
Soldiers of the Third Reich, who
have been invincible up until now,
are all currently whining in fear
for their lives, because of this
Bear Jew, and they are so
frightened that they cannot ignore
the rumors of these murderous
women! Now they can no longer
laugh at this matter and I hear
them complaining of the horrors
others have seen at the hands of
these women! They say no one has
survived them!
GENERAL # 1
Mein Fuhrer, these are just
stories. If there were truly no
survivors, than how would anyone
know of the so called horrors?
HITLER
SO THEY ARE JUST STORIES?!
The generals jump again.
General #1 is a bit stunned, and slightly uncomfortably
frightened.
GENERAL # 1
Well...they aren’t stories. There
are women killing our men-
HITLER
ARE YOU LYING NOW? HAVE YOU BEEN
MISINFORMING ME THIS WHOLE TIME?!
Intercom buzzes and Hitler slams his hand on the
button. KLIEST tries to speak, but Hitler cuts him off.
HITLER
KLIEST! Get in here and dispose of
this lying General!
The general becomes pale and looks at the other generals for
help. They turn away, unwilling to take any heat.
KLIEST
Yes, Mein Fuhrer.
(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 17.
There is a brief silence, until Kliest enters and stares at
the generals. Upon laying his eyes on the correct general,
Hitler nods his head.
Kliest pulls out his gun, and shoots the general in the head
at point blank range. The other generals take quick glances
at one another, slightly terrified at Hitler’s rage.
HITLER
Kliest...you are promoted to
General.
KLIEST
(confused)
Danke Mein Fuhrer. But, I wanted
to inform you that Private Berg is
here.
HITLER
Who, or what is this Private Berg?
KLIEST
He is the Private who survived the
attack from the ones they call the
"Betches". You wanted to see him
personally.
HITLER
Oh, yes, danke shoen for reminding
me.
Hitler proceeds to follow Kliest out, when he stops to look
at the generals.
HITLER
You two!
(snaps fingers)
Clean that up.
(gestures at dead general)
FADE OUT
EXT. FRENCH WOODS-DAY
FADE UP
Camera ZOOMS OUT for us to see shaking legs.
VOICE
(O.S.)
DROP YOUR PANTS!
Pants are dropped as commanded.
(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 18.
VOICE
(O.S.)
ON YOUR KNEES!
BETCH POV
Nazis drop to their knees. We see a large knife enter into
screen.
Nurse Sadie is seen stopping the holder of the knife and
insists that they pray first. Knife holder sighs and
obliges, and takes the rosary that is handed to them.
They finish a prayer and Sadie nods to continue.
Camera switches to Adelaide, and we hear screams from all
around. It brings a smile to her face.
We suddenly hear the voice of PRIVATE BERG:
PVT. BERG
(V.O.)
Metzger and i were the only ones
still alive after these...gypsies,
or she-devils ambushed us.
(beat)
Well, we weren’t the only ones
alive technically, but we were the
only ones they weren’t preparing to
kill.
His voice shakes, only to pause and in order to collect
his thoughts.
PVT. BERG
(CON’T)
They were...they were castrating
the others, while they were still
alive. Some...they let bleed to
death.
Camera still on Adelaide, she sits down with her snuff box.
PVT. BERG
Then, their leader called the
sergeant over...
LT. ADELAIDE
Send that kraut sarge over here.
The German sergeant, SGT. METZGER, approaches. The frame is
slowed down briefly.
(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 19.
LT. ADELAIDE
I assume you know what a "sit down"
means. So, please...help yourself.
(motions to a spot on the
ground)
The Nazi sarge eyeballs her. He answers then in accented
ENGLISH:
SGT. METZGER
And what if I don’t?
Adelaide just glares at the sergeant, a regular stare
down. The Nazi takes the hint and sits his ass down.
LT. ADELAIDE
Now, ain’t that more comfortable?
Adelaide smiles with pleasantry, while Metzger eyes her with
restrained hostility.
LT. ADELAIDE
Now, now, let’s be civil here. I’m
Lt. Adelaide Ray, and you are?
Beat.
SGT. METZGER
Sergeant Heinrich Metzger.
LT. ADELAIDE
Well now, Heinrich, that wasn’t so
hard, was it? And I see you speak
some English, that’s very good.
(beat)
Though do you speak English good,
Heinrich? ’Cause we have a few
ladies here who speak German damn
well. There’s the lovely Miss
Weiss over there.
Adelaide points out Wilhelmina, who we see standing on a
rock. She smiles demurely, and nods her head in
acknowledgment.
LT. ADELAIDE
Austrian Jew, high-tailed it out of
Munich, while the gettin’ was
good. Now she’s come back to give
all y’all a what for.
(beat)
And then there’s Miss Germany
herself, Sgt. Huela Schweiger. I’m
sure you know her real well.
(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 20.
SGT. METZGER
(venomously)
Every German knows of Huela
Schweiger.
Camera moves to Huela, who is casually standing, surveying
over all. She grins and the FRAME FREEZES.
Her NAME APPEARS on the screen, with her own theme playing,
the NARRATOR gives a quick background check of Huela.
FRAME CONTINUES.
SGT. METZGER
(snidely)
And I speak English very well,
lieutenant.
LT. ADELAIDE
(eyes him in response to his
tone)
Good. Now, let’s get down to
business.
Adelaide pulls out a map, and spreads it out across the
ground.
LT. ADELAIDE
(CON’T)
I am aware of a nice little troop
of your Nazi buddies are hidin’ out
somewhere near here. All I need
now you to do is point out on this
here map where they are, and tell
me what they’re packin’.
A beat.
SGT. METZGER
I’m afraid that I must respectfully
decline your request.
Adelaide stares daggers at the sergeant.
LT. ADELAIDE
You’re just gonn’ be difficult, now
ain’t cha? Imma ask ya one mor’
time, and may I add that yer answer
this time will cost ya yer
life. Now take that dough-schlong
lickin’ fanger and point out what I
need to know, or so help me
Jesus...
(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 21.
The Sarge and Lieutenant then glare at one another. Some
sort of mental battle pursuing between them.
SGT. METZGER
Your threats mean nothing to
me. You’re just a woman like any
other.
Adelaide stares long and hard then at him. She suddenly
laughs.
LT. ADELAIDE
You know what? That there
statement ya just made sets me in
giggles. You see, I was kinda
hoping you’d keep that stubbornness
up. Now you get to deal with the
Black Mama. I know y’all Nazis
know who she is. And she is one
angry woman, and the fact that
y’all don’t treat Negroes fair
don’t sit too well with her.
(beat)
I’m almost sorry to say that ya
ain’t gonn’ survive
her. Well...almost.
We hear laughter from the other Betches then.
LT. ADELAIDE
Hey Donna!
SGT. DONNA
Yea?
LT. ADELAIDE
There’s a German soldier out here
who wants to die for his
country! Why don’t ya come on out
here and make all our days by
granting him his final wish.
Adelaide grins widely and sits back to enjoy the show.
The camera switches to a dark tunnel on Adelaide’s
right. We hear something scraping against its walls, the
sound echoing.
Suspense grows as the camera switches between the faces of
Adelaide, Metzger, and that damn tunnel mouth. It stops
then on Metzger, then the mouth of the tunnel once more. And
after a few seconds the scraping sound ceases as Donna Dann
emerges with her skillet loosely by her side.
(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 22.
Que her theme and another FREEZE FRAME. Her NAME is
plastered on the screen and the NARRATOR’S voice is heard
giving her back story.
SCENE RESUMES. She slowly walks over to Metzger,
stone-faced.
SGT. DONNA
Well, ain’t you special? You get
to play a leadin’ role today. Do
you know what role that is?
SGT. METZGER
(beat)
No...
SGT. DONNA
You get the honor of playing my
bitch!
Donna grins sadistically. Rearing back her skillet hand,
she smashes her skillet straight into the Sarge’s head. She
continues to beat him to death, while doing so, she screams
profanities and such other things.
The camera begins to ZOOM OUT to view the other Betches as
they watch, laughing and cheering Donna on.
When Metzger is good and dead, Donna points at one of the
other two remaining Nazis still alive.
SGT. DONNA
YOU!
The addressed Nazi gets up as though to run for his life,
only to get shot by one of the Betches. All of them laugh
in response all the same.
LT. ADELAIDE
(sighs)
Jesus Christ on a bloody stick,
Geraldine!
Sadie is seen gasping and crossing herself at the Lord’s
name being taken in vain.
LT. ADELAIDE
Sorry Sadie, I ain’t accustomed to
taking the Lord’s name in vain, but
GODDAMMIT!
(turns to Geraldine)
Do me a favor and send that other
one over here...ALIVE!
(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 23.
Geraldine kicks the last living Nazi, Pvt. Berg, up and
leads him over.
Donna gets a hold of him then by the collar of his shirt.
SGT. DONNA
You get to step into my kitchen
wench! Now make me a cottonpickin’
sammich!
At that, the Betches laugh.
LT. ADELAIDE
(smiles)
English?
PVT. BERG
(shakes his head)
Nein.
Berg is scared shitless, and it’s clear as day.
LT. ADELAIDE
Willie!
Camera switches to Wilhelmina. FRAME FREEZES, her NAME is
screen upon the screen. The NARRATOR is heard giving her
quick background.
RESUMING SCENE, Weiss walks on over.
LT. ADELAIDE
Point out on this map where your
Jackboot pals are, and tell me how
many of ’em there are.
Weiss translates and quick as a jackrabbit, the private’s
hand shoots straight to the map the location.
PVT. BERG
There are about 15 of them here.
CPL. WILHELMINA
He says there are around 15
soldiers there.
LT. ADELAIDE
And what kind of artillery?
Willie translates once more.
(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 24.
PVT. BERG
They have a machine gun pointed
east.
CPL. WILHELMINA
The Nazis have a machine gun
pointing east.
CUT TO
INT. BERCTESGADEN-DAY
Hitler and Private Berg are seen sitting opposite one
another.
HITLER
How did you survive this-this
catastrophe?
PVT. BERG
They let me go.
HITLER
But why?
PVT. BERG
They told me that I was to live in
order to spread the word that I am
officially their Betch, as is the
rest of the Third Reich.
HITLER
WHAT?!
PVT. BERG
They consider the entire Nazi party
a congregation of their
Betches...and this, they say, is
proof.
Berg removes his cap to reveal a B-shaped scar branded into
his forehead.
CUT TO
EXT. FRENCH WOODS-DAY
We look up into the faces of Adelaide and Donna. Both have
huge grins on their faces. Adelaide is holding a hot fire
poker.
(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 25.
SGT. DONNA
You’re gettin’ pretty handy with
that there poker.
LT. ADELAIDE
Ya see Donna, now that’s how we in
Tennessee get things done.
FADE TO BLACK
EXT. PARISIAN ALLEY-NIGHT
FADE UP
CHAPTER TITLE appears:
CHAPTER THREE
"A STAG NIGHT IN PARIS"
FADE UP
Your usual dark and shady alley in Paris, France.
A SUBTITLE APPEARS:
JULY 1944
PARIS
SUBTITLE DISAPPEARS.
Now this alley is empty save the French Negro leaning
against one of its walls. He is waiting expectantly for
someone it seems.
As each and every person and couple to pass the mouth of the
alley turns out to be the someone, or someones he is not
waiting for- he grows restless.
He turns his back to walk some way down the alley.
UNKNOWN’S POV
Following up behind this young man, they silently make their
approach towards him.
A hand can be seen reaching out to grab his shoulder.
Young man suddenly swings around, taken off guard. But by
the look of him clutching something in his coat pocket, he
clearly was really to defend himself if need be.
(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 26.
His face calms a bit, and his hand goes down back his side.
SGT. DONNA
(O.S.)
Bone-swah, Marcel.
Donna, Sadie, and Geraldine stand before him. Each one
smiling at his jumpiness.
INT. TAVERN-CONTINUOUS
The tavern is lightly dimmed, buzzing with customers-
French, German, and American alike. The latter more
inconspicuous of course.
A record plays, mingling into the chatter of bar patrons.
The camera MANEUVERS about the tavern. It finally STOPS and
ZOOMS IN upon the Betches and Marcel.
They sit catty cornered at a table. Their table is out of
the way from the rest of the company there.
Each one is seen listening intently to Marcel. His words,
though, cannot be heard by the audience over the sound of
music and louder conversation about.
CUT TO
INT. "BROTHEL"-NIGHT
FADE UP
CU
A glass of wine. ZOOMING OUT SLOWLY, we see Wilhelmina
delicately holding said glass. She stares out a window in a
stone basement.
FADE OUT
FADE UP
A pair of creamy legs. Camera follows up them from shins to
the thighs then the body, and finally we see Sadie’s
face. ZOOMING OUT to see she is lounging across a couch not
too far from where Wilhelmina stands.
FADE OUT
FADE UP
(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 27.
We see Huela. She sits casually on a lounge chair. Her
legs crossed lazily and her skirt purposefully exposes her
legs.
Camera ZOOMS OUT to get the grander picture. Couches are
scattered around the room. There is the essence of sex
about the air.
FADE OUT
FADE UP
Stairs and the sound of laughter are heard upon them as
Geraldine walks down, followed by two very eager Germans.
She reaches the bottom of stairs and says in FRENCH
SUBTITLED IN ENGLISH:
PFC. GERALDINE
Here we are boys!
GERMAN SOLDIERS’ POV
We see Geraldine from the waist up. She is smiling and
gestures to the basement as if it is some sort of grand
ballroom. Camera shifts and surveys the room and its pretty
contents.
We switch to the excited smiling faces of the Nazis. The
camera moves in between the two German’s heads, looking at
the scene.
FADE TO BLACK
INT. BASEMENT-EARLIER
Screen is black.
LT. ADELAIDE
(V.O.)
Marcel said tha’ premier is at his
lady’s theater, am I correct?
FADE UP
Adelaide appears, as the more prominent figure in this
scene. She stands at a table, the other Betches scattered
around a stone basement. This was the "brothel" before.
Betches that were seen from previous, but not in this scene
and on, are dead. All presently living have their eyes
turned toward her.
(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 28.
PFC. SADIE
Tha’s whot he said. Thare was
sumethin’ ’bout his galfriend, but
tha’s nah important.
PFC. GERALDINE
But that’s all he knows at the
moment. He also said there were a
few Nazis he recommended to our
"services." They wanted to wind
down apparently.
She says this, while giving the "you know what I mean" look.
PFC. SADIE
He thinks there’s a chance they
might know a wee bit more.
LT. ADELAIDE
Well then, we all know what this
calls for.
All the Betches grin and chuckle slightly.
LT. ADELAIDE
Sadie, since you know yerself some
Franch, you gonn’ have to go to the
front lines here. You ready fer
tha’?
PFC. SADIE
Don’t warry ’bout me, I’m ready fer
anythin’.
She smiles then, and the face of an innocent Irish American
transform to a more sinister being. FRAME FREEZES and her
NAME is across the screen. We hear the ever faithful voice
of the NARRATOR give her brief story.
The scene RESUMES.
PFC. SADIE
Me only qualms are ’bout the
sellin’ o’ me own body, but it
won’t do tha’ far right?
LT. ADELAIDE
(grinning)
Naw, I should think not. If
they’re hard to crack, just
kill’em.
Adelaide turns to Geraldine.
(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 29.
LT. ADELAIDE
You speak yerself some Franch,
too. Ya best suit up then. And
Wilhelmina and Huela, y’all gonn’
go as German prostitutes.
Huela smiles rather stoically, and Willie nods in assent.
PFC. GERALDINE
I love these kinds of missions!
Scene fades out with Geraldine smiling.
FADE TO BLACK
INT. "BROTHEL"-CONTINUOUS
LT. ADELAIDE
(V.O.)
Now y’all should kn ow the gist of
yer assignment. Yeh’ve done it
enough times now. First ya
booze’em up.
FADE UP
The basement has returned to its brothel appearance. The
Germans are laughing with their respective girls. Their
jacket’s lie on the floor and their clothes look
half-opened. Numerous glasses of wine and beer are strewn
everywhere. The Betches ham it up to encourage the men to
loosen up.
CUT TO
LT. ADELAIDE
(V.O.)
You get’em to talk, anyway ya can.
Huela flirts and teases one of the Nazis, while Geraldine
nonchalantly slides off his boots. They question him with
seductive voices, prompting him to let loose the information
they need.
CPL. WILHELMINA
(V.O.)
And if they prove to be harder to
seduce?
CUT TO
(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 30.
We see the other German seemingly catching on to what may be
really going on. He starts to push Sadie and Willie away in
his suspicion.
The first Nazi sees his companion’s struggles and panic
begins to infect him as well. The Betches start to prepare
for the worst then.
SGT. HUELA
(V.O.)
We eliminate them.
The two Germans continue their struggling. The girls
visibly make their decisions, glancing to each other the
acceptance of a failed mission.
CUT TO
On Huela’s upper thigh, we see a her holding a blade.
Geraldine restrains their German, as Huela straddles him,
covering his mouth. Taking her blade, she stabs him
numerous times over.
ZOOMING ONTO his face, the look of fear is in his eyes.
CUT TO
The other Betches have manged to gag theirs. Suddenly he
breaks free from them and tries to escape. Sadie trips him
and both she and Willie grab his leg and drag him back.
Sadie sits on him to keep him in place, while Willie holds
his ankles. Sadie follows Huela’s lead and stabs the German
repeatedly. We hear his painful groans.
After all is said and done, Huela stands, cleaning his
blade.
SGT. HUELA
Well, that was productive.
CPL. WILHELMINA
We didn’t get anything.
On that note, six Nazis barrel down the stairs, guns
blazing. The Betches have barely enough time to reach for
their guns when a shoot out ensues.
CUT TO
Bullets fly, and nothing can be seen of who is actually
killing who. Yet the first of the Betches to die is
Geraldine, who takes out a damn Nazi with her.
(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 31.
Willie kills one Nazi, but running out of bullets, she
resorts to pistol whipping at the next to come at
her. However, he gets several slugs into her. She, though,
counters back by dragging her blade into his chest as she
falls to her demise.
Huela takes down one Nazi, but is shot a few times in the
process. Discarding her gun, she takes her dagger and
charges at a Nazi. He shoots at her, yet she keeps on
coming. Finally reaching him, she sinks her blade into his
neck as he shoots her in the gut continuously.
Sadie blows down one Nazi to the ground just as another
shoots her hand. Ignoring the pain, she slams her gun into
his head. He crashes into the wall, and falls to the ground
leaving a trail of blood behind him.
Then Sadie collapses to the ground, clutching a gun wound in
the leg in addition to her hand injury.
FADE OUT
INT. "BROTHEL"-CONTINUOUS
The camera zooms into the face of the first Nazi to die,
then to the second.
We see Omara standing by Geraldine’s body, and then a swift
to the bodies of the ones she killed.
Then we see the bodies of those who fell at the hand of
Willie, and a swift to her body.
Adelaide is seen squatting by Huela, her distress over the
losses is obvious. The two Nazis killed by Huela lie not to
far away and are met with a glare.
At last, we finally lay eye upon the Nazis killed by Sadie.
We watch as Donna’s feet walk over to Sadie’s body.
Just then, life sparks up within Sadie as she tries to
breath. Donna quickly squats down beside her.
SGT. DONNA
Adelaide! We got us a breather!
Omara and Adelaide rush the hell over.
LT. ADELAIDE
Well, I’ll be damned!
THEIR POV
32.
We see the upper half of Sadie’s body. In her hand, she
holds her rosary. The camera zooms in on it, as the screen
FADES TO BLACK.
INT. BUTCHER SHOP-NIGHT
FADE UP
A brightly lit backroom of some sort of butcher shop.
Suddenly Marcel enters the frame as he is slammed into a
wall by Adelaide.
She holds a large knife to his neck, while Donna and Omara
stand on either side of their fearless leader.
Donna has her skillet in hand, looking intimidating as
possible. Omara makes sure the presence of the fire poker
in her hand is know. Each one of the women is angrier than
the next.
Marcel, on the other hand, looks utterly petrified.
LT. ADELAIDE
SPEAK!
MARCEL
I-I don’t understand!
PFC. OMARA
What do you mean "you don’t"
understand"?!
MARCEL
Why so violent?
SGT. DONNA
Who’d yah tell, rat?!
MARCEL
What?!
LT. ADELAIDE
Cut the horseshit(crap)! I got me
three dead ladies and one
injured-SEVERELY! Now, the only
one who knew about our little
rendezvous ’sides us was you. So
ya best start talkin’ and gimme a
reason to not kill you right here
and now!
(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 33.
Marcel is beyond frightened, but down right fearful for his
life. And as he speaks to explain, it’s quickly in half
French and half broken English.
Not one of the Betches understands a word of what he is
gibbering. They just stare dumbfounded, trying to decipher
his incoherency.
PFC. OMARA
(looks to Donna)
What did he say?
Donna shrugs, she’s just as discombobulated.
Marcel continues to ramble his nonsense words in fear.
Donna then gets right up in his face.
SGT. DONNA
WE-CAN’T-UNDERSTAND-YOU!
Omara does likewise as Donna.
PFC. OMARA
SPECKEN ZE ENGLISH!
LT. ADELAIDE
Oh Jesus Christ! The only one of
us who speaks Franch is
dead-BECAUSE OF YOU!
Adelaide leans in closer than the other two, who switch
around to backing her up in the intimidation department.
Marcel simply stares, pitifully no less. He takes a breath
then and attempts again to speak, but it’s the same damn
result.
Donna suddenly slams her weapon down on a nearby table,
sighing loudly and violently.
SGT. DONNA
Ya have gotta be kiddin’
me! Anyone speak
gibberish? ’Cause that’s what that
is! It ain’t no Franch.
Light bulb just then goes on over Omara’s head.
PFC. OMARA
Wait! I think I sort of got what
he said that time!
(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 34.
She moves in closer, listening carefully. Adelaide joins
in, putting her face closer to Omara’s as if she can hear
through Omara’s other ear. Donna follows suit.
Marcel is now a little more confused than terrified. His
shows clearly he’s thinking "WTF, what are they
doing?" Nevertheless he starts over trying to explain
himself.
The scene is nothing short but comical enough to belong in a
cartoon.
LT. ADELAIDE
(beat)
What’s he sayin’?
All listen as Marcel continues his moon speak, which Omara
seems to understand quite well.
PFC. OMARA
He says that he told no one, least
of all the Nazis. Why would he
anyhow, they don’t like Negroes.
SGT. DONNA
(huffs)
I coulda told ya tha’.
LT. ADELAIDE
Shh! Go on Omara.
PFC. OMARA
Also, he had no idea someone knew
and he...oh, he says he’s sorry for
our losses.
She continues to listen, moving closer as though it may help
her. As she moves forward, as do the others, like their
heads appear to be attached.
PFC. OMARA
Um...there’s a German premier?
Marcel nods.
PFC. OMARA
At the theater he works at with his
girlfriend...and she’s a Jew? She
narrowly escaped from...the Jew
Hunter?!
Marcel nods once again to the incredulous look from Omara.
(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 35.
PFC. OMARA
Now some famous German war hero is
smitten...with her. The movie
is...about him? His military
conquests were so great that
Goebbels made a movie
called...Nation’s Pride? So that’s
how the premier is at the theater.
Adelaide jumps back in annoyance, pushing Donna back and
startling all of them.
LT. ADELAIDE
WE ALREADY KNOW THAT! YOU TOLD US
EARLIER!
PFC. OMARA
WAIT! There’s more!
With that, Adelaide and Donna resume their previous
positions, intently attentive once more.
PFC. OMARA
He says there’s been a new
development...
Omara stops then and turns to her co-Betches. The two back
up and look at her expectantly. She, though, is frozen with
shock.
SGT. DONNA
(eyes wide)
What is it?!
LT. ADELAIDE
What’d he say?
PFC. OMARA
(beat)
He said that most of the
High-Command will be
present...including Hitler.
Silence. Shocked faces stare other equally shocked faces.
LT. ADELAIDE
Ya-ya ain’t serious...
She looks to Marcel, and he nods.
Excitement spreads rapidly over her face. She suddenly
jumps into the air, clicking her heels.
(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 36.
LT. ADELAIDE
SWEET POTATO PIE AND CORN BREAD! We
gonn’ kill hundreds of Nazis-AND
Hitler at this shindig!
She stands straight, looking proud as can be.
LT. ADELAIDE
(CON’T)
Ladies, we gonn’ kill Hitler. We
gonn’ torture him, and rip his
manhood from him. Ya know why?
(beat)
’Cause he ain’t no man! He’s a
monster! We gonn’ take what ain’t
rightly his! I don’t care if we
die tryin’! But we better go out
with some kinda bang! I WANT HIM
AND HIS MANHOOD ON A SILVER
PLATTER! YA HEAR?!
Omara and Donna stand up straight, sharing smiles.
PFC. OMARA
That can be arranged.
SGT. DONNA
We’ll do ya one better and shove
his so-called manhood down his
throat!
LT. ADELAIDE
Well then ladies, let’s get Sadie,
’cause we got ourselves a movie to
catch.
All smile, even Marcel. The scene FADES OUT on Adelaide’s
grinning face.
INT. VICHY-BASED S.S. OFFICE-DAY
FADE UP
CHAPTER TITLE appears:
CHAPTER FOUR
"OPERATION KINO...PART DEUX"
FADE UP
(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 37.
Lt. colonel Hannelore Landon seats at her secretarial
desk. She is writing on a paper pad. Getting up then, she
walks toward the office of Col. Hans Landa.
She knocks on the door, and waits about two seconds for an
answer. Receiving none, she proceeds in anyhow.
The office is empty, and a tab bit messy. It appears the
Jew Hunter was in a hurry. Scoffing at the mess,
she continues to his desk with the sheet of paper.
About to just leave the paper there on the disheveled desk,
something catches her eye.
Delicately picking up a bit of paper, the camera focuses in
on her scanning it. Her eyes begin to widen. She lowers the
page then to reveal a mischievous smile that has spread
across her face.
FADE TO BLACK
EXT. PARISIAN ALLEY-DAY
It appears to be the same alley as before. But this time we
see Hannelore, and it is she walking towards a young man who
is clearly Marcel. Though she appears to be stalking more.
LTC. HANNELORE
Misseur!
Marcel turns, looking perplexed. He stops, nevertheless,
waiting for her to catch up to him.
LTC. HANNELORE
(smiling kindly)
Bonjour! May I ask, do you speak
English by any chance?
MARCEL
(hesitant)
Oui.
Landon switches to ENGLISH:
LTC. HANNELORE
I may have something you may care
wish to hear.
Her mischievous smiles returns as the camera ZOOMS IN on her
face.
CUT TO
38.
INT. BETCHES’ HIDEOUT-NIGHT
The remaining Betches, Sadie, Donna, and Omara, and their
leader Adelaide prepare for what may be the final showdown.
Adelaide and Sadie are dressed to the nines. Sadie wears
white gloves to hide her hand wound. Donna and Omara sport
the uniforms of chauffeurs.
Adelaide straps a knife to her upper leg as she speaks:
LT. ADELAIDE
Everyone knows their part, right?
Each one nods and finishes up concealing away their weapons
on their respective persons.
PFC. SADIE
Lieutenant?
After stowing a gun into her purse, Adelaide looks up toward
her.
PFC. SADIE
I feel tha’ this bein’ the possible
last moments we may have breathing,
may I request we join hands for a
final prayer?
Donna and Omara look to one another with faces that seem to
suggest they condone the prayer circle for once. Better
late then never, right?
LT. ADELAIDE
Request granted.
They gather together in a circle. All hesitate to follow
Sadie in closing their eyes, but sure enough they follow
suit.
PFC. SADIE
Lord God, Yahweh, Almighty Father
o’ All, give us the strength ta
wage final battle with the agents
o’ a mass-murderin’, Jew-hatin’
madman. The personification of
Satan on this earth, who must be
cast once again back down to the
lowest levels of hell.
(grows violent)
May he cower at the edge o’ our
knives and scream like the
miserable wretch he is as we tear
(MORE)
(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 39.
PFC. SADIE (cont’d)
his manhood from him. May all
remember us then and how we brought
upon the suffering to his list
breath. And should we fail, Oh
Lord, may others live by our bloody
example and dare to attempt to
finish where we left off...Amen.
Stunned silence.
BETCHES
Amen.
CUT TO
INT. RESTAURANT BACKROOM-CONTINUOUS
BLACK.
The sounds of a dial reel can be heard spinning as the
numbers are whirled in.
Then the voice of LTC. Landon is heard in GERMAN SUBTITLED
IN ENGLISH:
LTC. HANNELORE
The two women who’ve just entered.
CUT TO
An open entryway reveals the numerous tables and chairs of a
rustic restaurant. There is UPROARIOUS SHOUTING and SOUNDS
OF STRUGGLE.
LT. ADELAIDE
(O.S.)
GET YOUR GODDAMN HANDS OFF OF ME!
Suddenly two hooded and hands tied Betches, obviously
Adelaide, and the other Sadie, are manhandled in by two
NAZIS.
MOVING BACK, two chairs are seen before a table as the
Germans place the Betches down into them.
The bags are tugged off their heads.
BETCHES’ POV
LTC. Hannelore Landon sits before them in a black dress with
a veiled pill box hat. She smiles genially at them, yet
there is smugness about it.
(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 40.
LTC. HANNELORE
Lt. Adelaide Ray I presume?
LT. ADELAIDE
Hannelore Landon?
LTC. HANNELORE
You’ve had a nice, long run,
Adelaide. But now the time has
come for its fateful end.
CUT TO
EXT. BACK ALLEY-CONTINUOUS
Donna and Omara are resting back against a brick wall. They
are for lack of a better word, jittery as hell.
Their nonchalance ruined by the building filled with the
master race next to them has left them more than on
guard. It has left them more paranoid than they are.
Suddenly they heard the sounds of movement and voices around
the corner.
Donna leads the way to investigate with Omara fast behind.
BETCHES’ POV
Two NAZIS step out of the shadows, armed, and are followed
by additional two. Between these two...is Hitler.
Back to Donna and Omara, their faces clearly express, "Where
the hell does he think he’s going?"
CUT TO
INT. RESTAURANT BACKROOM-CONTINUOUS
Adelaide and Sadie gape with mouths open in shock.
LTC. HANNELORE
Do you need me to reiterate what I
have told you, or does the feline
still possess your tongue?
Surely, a wave of confusion comes over them at that failed
euphemism. Nevertheless though, Adelaide regains her
composure to speak:
(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 41.
LT. ADELAIDE
Nah, nah, I-I think I hear what ya
said, but I don’t believe ya is the
problem.
LTC. HANNELORE
Hitler’s political decoy dying in
his place aspect, or the fact that
I so masterfully orchestrated the
switch by having Hitler fear for
his pathetic life?
LT. ADELAIDE
Neither, just that the Nazis be as
gullible as I thought they were.
CUT TO
INT. HITLER’S SAFE HOUSE-CONTINUOUS
Hitler sits at the head of a grand dining table. He relaxes
eating a readily prepared meal.
MOVING AROUND to the WINDOW BEHIND him, Donna and Omara can
be seen peering through.
They look to one another in utter disbelief, before
muttering praises to the sky.
CUT TO
INT. RESTAURANT BACKROOM-CONTINUOUS
Hannelore pulls out the cork of a bottle of Chianti . Three
glasses have already been brought and wait patiently to be
spilled.
LTC. HANNELORE
To recap what has been done to lead
us to this moment...
(pours drinks)
I found my feigned loyalty to the
Nazis to have been completely
unnecessary and tiresome.
LT. ADELAIDE
Ya think?
CUT TO
42.
EXT. PARISIAN ALLEY-NIGHT
So begins the flashbacks.
Hannelore is seen talking with Marcel as the present
Hannelore continues to speak:
LTC. HANNELORE
(V.O.)
Oh yes, that realization is what
lead me to your little friend
Marcel and his Resistance mon
ami’s, who then went to you with
the information concerning
Operation Kino.
CUT TO
INT. VICHY-BASED S.S. OFFICE-DAY
Hannelore is seen reading the TELEGRAPH left by the Jew
Hunter concerning the needed security of Hitler’s
attendance.
It is originally in GERMAN, and then it FADES into ENGLISH.
LTC. HANNELORE
(CON’T)
Then your attempts to invade the
Nation’s Pride premier thus lead
into the vicious circle called life
in which Hitler will have to say
adieu to his no-no-squares.
CUT TO
Hannelore sits at her desk forging the handwriting of
Landa. She is ending with a flourish of his fake signature.
PFC. SADIE
Clearly then, you’re clinically
insane for putting this off.
CUT TO
43.
INT. RESTAURANT BACKROOM-CONTINUOUS
LT. ADELAIDE
Well, I like it.
LTC. HANNELORE
And that is how the special
privileges of being the secretarial
aid to the infamous Col. Hans Landa
can be so beneficial ladies.
Betches just stare at her like "WTF?"
LTC. HANNELORE
(CON’T)
But to add to my many benefits, I
truly believe amnesty for my
actions is in order.
CUT TO
INT. HITLER’S SAFE HOUSE-CONTINUOUS
Two SOLDIERS stand guard outside the dining room.
A noise is heard O.S. and sends one guard to walk off and
check it out.
Suddenly there is a low grunt...this brings the other guard
to search after his fellow Nazi.
We hear then yet another low grunt.
CUT TO
The two soldiers lay dead on the floor at the feet of Donna
and Omara. They grin at one another...
CUT TO
The two Betches stand before the dining room doors and look
to one another like this is it.
Camera ZOOMS into the dining room where Hitler sits unaware.
CUT TO
44.
INT. RESTAURANT BACKROOM-CONTINUOUS
Adelaide and Sadie are freed from their bonds and are
sipping wine.
Hannelore is off in the background, chattering way into the
microphone of a two-way radio, one headphone pressed up to
her ear.
LTC. HANNELORE
So it will be recorded that I was
part of Operation Kino from the
very beginning, as a double agent,
and that all its members are to
receive the Congressional Medal of
Honor. Full citizenship for
myself, but that goes without
saying. And a Fifth Avenue
apartment in New York City as my
well-deserved reward for helping
save the world from tyranny. Do
you have all that, sir?
(pause)
I look forward to meeting you as
well, sir.
(pause)
Oh, she’s right here.
Hannelore ends the long-winded conversation and hands the
headphones and microphone to Adelaide.
LTC. HANNELORE
Ladies, I do believe we are in
business.
The two Betches share the same thought, "Riiiigght..."
LT. ADELAIDE
Yes, sir?
CUT TO
INT. HITLER’S SAFE HOUSE-CONTINUOUS
Hitler’s sits at the table, finishing off his meal.
Emerging from the shadows behind him are Donna and Omara.
They creep up upon him like a pair of lionesses. When they
are near enough, Donna lifts a large knife slowly up into
the air.
CUT TO
45.
EXT. WOODS-MORNING
A military jeep rumbles down a dirt road in the woods.
CUT TO
Adelaide and Sadie are walking side by side to the end of
enemy lines. Hannelore is in back with her ma-servant
HERMAN.
PFC. SADIE
What’d he say, the general?
LT. ADELAIDE
On crossin’ enemy lines, Hannelore
and her dog are to surrender
willingly to us as
prisoners. She’s to stay alive...
(pause)
But how’s we suppose to trust her
is the real million dollar
question.
Hannelore overhears their conversation:
LTC. HANNELORE
Trust me, girls, I am most certain
Hitler is sufficiently dead at this
point. And at the hands of your
two cohorts no less-who sadly will
not be making it back to live to
tell the tale.
CUT TO
INT. HITLER’S SAFE HOUSE-CONTINUOUS
The camera SLOWLY GOES UP from the bottom of the dining
table to the tippy top. On it’s table cloth we gaze upon
the decapitated head of Adolf Hitler, completed with apple
stuffed in mouth on a platter.
Resting their feet on his table, and sampling his foods are
Omara and Donna.
SGT. DONNA
Pass me tha’ apple over there?
Omara obliges.
(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 46.
PFC. OMARA
Hey Sarge, think we did good?
SGT. DONNA
(grins)
Yep, we’ve done damn good.
Camera WHIPS AROUND as violent banging upon the door
commences.
SGT. DONNA
(sighs)
Well, sounds like the hell hounds
are a-comin’.
Door bursts open, with NAZIS tumbling into the room.
There are about eight or so more and each one is dumbfounded
after the next, looking at one another.
NAZIS’ POV
They look at Hitler’s head, then at the two Betches
responsible.
PFC. OMARA
(props her gun)
Hades, here we come.
SMASH CUT
BLACK.
Gun shots and shouts are the last we hear.
CUT TO
EXT. WOODS-MORNING
We transition back to COLOR.
Hannelore steps up to Adelaide, her gun in hand.
LTC. HANNELORE
Well, I officially surrender myself
over to Lieutenant Ray.
She hands Adelaide her gun.
LT. ADELAIDE
(inspects gun)
(MORE)
(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 47.
LT. ADELAIDE (cont’d)Thank ya very much, Lt.
Colonel. Sadie, cuff the good Lt.
Colonel’s hands behind her back.
LTC. HANNELORE
Is that really necessary?
Sadie proceeds to cuff Hannelore as Adelaide replies:
LT. ADELAIDE
Imma slave to appearances.
Truly fascinated by the gun, she suddenly shoots Herman in
the shoulder.
He falls flat on his back, howling.
Hannelore jumps back appalled.
LTC. HANNELORE
Are you mad?! I asked your general
to spare that man’s life!
Adelaide doesn’t pay much attention to Hannelore.
LT. ADELAIDE
That ain’t gonn’ keep him down for
long.
(shoots Herman in the gut)
Thare we go. Sadie, go castrate
that boy now, will ya?
Sadie eagerly does as she is ordered as Hannelore stares
flabbergasted at Adelaide.
LT. ADELAIDE
Oh yea, they don’t give a shit
about him. It’s you they want.
Hannelore is speechless, so she continues to merely stare.
Adelaide then walks up to her, and points the gun right at
her.
LT. ADELAIDE
Even though you ain’t really
treated as a Nazi by the Nazis, to
us you kinda are...to me
especially, you are. Now it don’t
sit right wit’ me for you to go to
my country, livin’ it up in one of
my cities, buyin’ shit, eatin’ my
(MORE)
(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 48.
LT. ADELAIDE (cont’d)food, made by people, in my
god-fearin’ country!
(pause)
And for you to request amnesty from
my people without any
confrontation...well, that just
ain’t right. Now Imma gonn’ give
you a remainder for you to live
wit’ and for the whole world to see
tha’ you are Nazi scrum, and thus
you-are-my-BITCH!
Beat.
PFC. SADIE
Um, Lieutenant, we ain’t got the
poker, let alone a fire burning.
Hannelore grows hopeful then.
Beat.
PFC. SADIE
So here, use this.
Sadie hands over the bloody knife just used to castrate
Herman to Adelaide.
CUT TO
Hannelore is screaming hysterically and clawing the ground.
Adelaide is crouched over her, craving the infamous "B" into
Hannelore’s forehead. Sadie is beside her lieutenant,
watching giddily.
LT. ADELAIDE
Ya know sumthin’ Sadie, I think
this just might be the perfect end
to a beginning.
The two chuckle ghoulishly.
CUT TO
BLACK
THE END