Achieving Life BalanceAchieving Life Balance
Coping with Stress @ Work and @ HomeCoping with Stress @ Work and @ Home
Copyright – Not to be reproduced. – Provided by Power Link Dynamics TR - 2
Seminar Goals • Eliminate any misconceptions about stress
management • Learn to avoid or eliminate stressors
when possible • Build upon your current coping resources
and stress-management skills • Develop new coping resources
Copyright – Not to be reproduced. – Provided by Power Link Dynamics TR - 3
Stress is Life
Worth Remembering …
“If you want to avoid worry live in a day-tight compartment and don’t stew about the future. Just live each day until bedtime.”
- Dale Carnegie
Copyright – Not to be reproduced. – Provided by Power Link Dynamics TR - 4
Stress Busters
Questions Worth Answering:
• What is creating stress in your life?• What can you do about it?• What are you prepared to do about it?
Copyright – Not to be reproduced. – Provided by Power Link Dynamics TR - 5
Life is About WIIFM’sQuestions Worth Answering:
• How satisfied are you with where you are in your career, your home or social life?
• If you could make a change in your career, your home or your social life what would it be?
• What do you need to do to make that happen?
Copyright – Not to be reproduced. – Provided by Power Link Dynamics TR - 6
What’s Your WIIFM?
Worth Remembering …
“Those who cannot tell what they desire or expect still sigh and struggle with indefinite thoughts and vast wishes”
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Copyright – Not to be reproduced. – Provided by Power Link Dynamics TR - 7
The Attitude Challenge• Does everyone have an attitude?• Are they all the same?• Do you own 100% of yours?• Does your attitude have an impact on the
outcome in any given situation?
Copyright – Not to be reproduced. – Provided by Power Link Dynamics TR - 8
Attitude
Worth Remembering …
“Change what you can – influence what you will – and give up all of those things that you cannot control”
Copyright – Not to be reproduced. – Provided by Power Link Dynamics TR - 9
Change Model
C – Commit – to a new beginning
H – Habits – break old and start new
A – Action – take one step at a time
N – Never – never give up – be persistent
G – Goals – set SMART targets
E – Evaluate – your plan & reward yourself
Copyright – Not to be reproduced. – Provided by Power Link Dynamics TR - 10
Good Habits = Good Results
Worth Remembering …
“As long as you keep doing what you’ve been doing then you are going to keep on getting what you’ve been getting. Change the habit – change the result”
- Zig Ziglar
Copyright – Not to be reproduced. – Provided by Power Link Dynamics TR - 11
Stress?
Questions Worth Answering:
• What is stress?• What do we know for certain about
stress?• What do we know for certain that can
help us cope with the negative health side-effects of stress?
Copyright – Not to be reproduced. – Provided by Power Link Dynamics TR - 12
Relax – You’re Alive
Worth Remembering …
“Bless this stress. It helps me see that I’m such a mess”
- Loretta LaRoche
Copyright – Not to be reproduced. – Provided by Power Link Dynamics TR - 13
Functional
Dysfunctional
ExcitementComfort
Boredom
Low Balanced High
Frustration
Stress Level
Copyright – Not to be reproduced. – Provided by Power Link Dynamics TR - 14
Three Methods for Coping with Stress
• Eliminate the stressor or change your response to it
• Use the coping resources available to you• Develop new coping resources
Copyright – Not to be reproduced. – Provided by Power Link Dynamics TR - 15
1. Most Critical Issues
2. 4. Least Critical Issues
3.
Able to Change Difficult to Change
Hig
h P
rior
ity
Low
Pri
orit
y
Copyright – Not to be reproduced. – Provided by Power Link Dynamics TR - 16
Most Critical Issues • Your most critical stress issues are those
you feel are a high priority to change and you are able to change them. If it is blocking you from achieving your goals then it should be a high priority.
Copyright – Not to be reproduced. – Provided by Power Link Dynamics TR - 17
Least Critical Issues • Your least critical stress issues are those
with a low priority and are very difficult to change. For those stressors that you can change - develop a plan. For those stressors that you can’t change - than you need to change your response to them.
Copyright – Not to be reproduced. – Provided by Power Link Dynamics TR - 18
Balance
Worth Remembering …
“Much of the stress that people feel doesn’t come from having too much to do. It comes from not finishing what they’ve started.”
- David Allen
Copyright – Not to be reproduced. – Provided by Power Link Dynamics TR - 19
The New Reality
Worth Remembering …
“I thought 24/7 was a new kind of Mac’s Milk not a new way of life. This new technology was suppose to improve the quality of our lives – not compound it”
Copyright – Not to be reproduced. – Provided by Power Link Dynamics TR - 20
Just Say No
Worth Remembering …
“Besides the noble art of getting things done, there is the noble art of leaving things undone. The wisdom of life consists of eliminating the non-essentials.”
Copyright – Not to be reproduced. – Provided by Power Link Dynamics TR - 21
My De-Stressor
Worth Remembering …
“If you don’t like something change it; if you can’t change it, change the way you are thinking about it”
- Mary Engelbreit
Copyright – Not to be reproduced. – Provided by Power Link Dynamics TR - 22
Relationship Coping Resources
• Problem Solving -- the ability to deal directly with the difficult situations you face and make positive changes to resolve them.
• Communication -- the ability to share thoughts and feelings with others in order to promote mutual understanding, even under difficult circumstances.
Copyright – Not to be reproduced. – Provided by Power Link Dynamics TR - 23
Relationship Coping Resources
• Closeness -- the degree to which you have developed a supportive social fabric in each area of life
• Flexibility -- the degree of organization in your life and how comfortable you are with unstructured and unpredictable situations
Copyright – Not to be reproduced. – Provided by Power Link Dynamics TR - 24
Personal Coping Resources• Self-Esteem -- feeling good about yourself
and perceiving yourself as having inherent worth as a person
• Mastery -- feeling competent and in control of your life
• Social Support -- having a network of friends and family you can count on
Copyright – Not to be reproduced. – Provided by Power Link Dynamics TR - 25
Personal Coping Resources• Spiritual Beliefs -- believing in a set of
values external to yourself• Nutrition -- dietary habits and motivations• Exercise -- physical activity that maximizes
or minimizes your ability to cope with stress
Copyright – Not to be reproduced. – Provided by Power Link Dynamics TR - 26
Problem Solvingrefers to your ability
to deal directly with
the difficult situations you face
and make positive changes
to resolve them.
Copyright – Not to be reproduced. – Provided by Power Link Dynamics TR - 27
To Improve Your Problem Solving Skills
• Deal with the problem as soon as you perceive it
• Define the problem carefully• Separate people from the problem• Separate emotions from the problem
Copyright – Not to be reproduced. – Provided by Power Link Dynamics TR - 28
To Improve Your Problem Solving Skills
• Determine your desired outcome• Make a list of creative and practical
solutions• Don’t get trapped into thinking there is
only “one” resolution
Copyright – Not to be reproduced. – Provided by Power Link Dynamics TR - 29
Problems
Worth Remembering …
“The problem is not that there are problems. The problem is expecting otherwise and thinking that having problems is a problem.”
- Theodore Rubin
Copyright – Not to be reproduced. – Provided by Power Link Dynamics TR - 30
Communicationis the ability to share thoughts
and feelings with others in order
to promote mutual
understanding, even under
difficult circumstances.
Copyright – Not to be reproduced. – Provided by Power Link Dynamics TR - 31
Communication Patterns• Gender Patterns• Generational
Patterns• Geographic
Patterns
• Cultural Patterns• Educational
Patterns• Occupational
Patterns
Copyright – Not to be reproduced. – Provided by Power Link Dynamics TR - 32
Communication Realities• You cannot not communicate • Whenever contact is made
communication occurs • Meanings are in people not in words • Meanings cannot be transferred from one
mind to another … only words can be transferred.
Copyright – Not to be reproduced. – Provided by Power Link Dynamics TR - 33
“We only hear half of what is said to us,
understand only half of that, and remember only
half of that.”
--Mignon McLaughlin
Copyright – Not to be reproduced. – Provided by Power Link Dynamics TR - 34
Active Listening• Listen to understand, not to judge• Focus on the message sent• Use “reflective listening” to summarize
the other person’s message• Praise others for sharing
Copyright – Not to be reproduced. – Provided by Power Link Dynamics TR - 35
Listening Realities • Humans have the ability to listen at a rate
of _______________ words per minute • Humans have the ability to speak at a rate
of _______________ words per minute • That gives humans ________ words per
minute to tune out.
- Dr. Ralph Nichols
Copyright – Not to be reproduced. – Provided by Power Link Dynamics TR - 36
Effective Speaking• Use “I” statements when you speak• Be respectfully assertive• Speak for a purpose• As for feedback
Copyright – Not to be reproduced. – Provided by Power Link Dynamics TR - 37
Speak with Purpose
Worth Remembering …
“Let us say what we feel, and feel what we say; let speech harmonize with life”
- Seneca
Copyright – Not to be reproduced. – Provided by Power Link Dynamics TR - 38
Closenessrefers to the degree to which
you have developed a
supportive social fabric in
each area of your life.
Copyright – Not to be reproduced. – Provided by Power Link Dynamics TR - 39
“We cannot live only for ourselves. A thousand
fibers connect us with our fellow men...”
--Herman Melville
Copyright – Not to be reproduced. – Provided by Power Link Dynamics TR - 40
Developing Closeness• Make relationships a priority• Share your personal feelings• Find quality time together• Focus on the positive and give praise• Focus on future goals
Copyright – Not to be reproduced. – Provided by Power Link Dynamics TR - 41
FlexibilityIndicates both the degree of
structure in your life and how
comfortable you are with
situations that are unstructured
and unpredictable
Copyright – Not to be reproduced. – Provided by Power Link Dynamics TR - 42
Developing Flexibility• Be open to diverse ideas• Brainstorm ideas without judging• Avoid judging “right” or “wrong”• “Try on” other people’s ideas
Copyright – Not to be reproduced. – Provided by Power Link Dynamics TR - 43
“The most successful people are those whose success is the result of steady accretion. It is those people who carefully advance step by
step, their minds becoming wider and wider, and progressively better able to grasp any theme or situation, persevering in what they know to be practical, and concentrating their thought upon
it, who are bound to succeed in the greatest degree.”
--Alexander Graham Bell
Copyright – Not to be reproduced. – Provided by Power Link Dynamics TR - 44
Achieving Life Balance• For stressors you CAN change, develop a
specific plan of action for creating change, then follow through with that plan
• Change your response to those stressors you CANNOT change
• Improving stress management capabilities can increase personal and business productivity, emotional well-being, and relationships
Copyright – Not to be reproduced. – Provided by Power Link Dynamics TR - 45
Achieving Life Balance• Stress is not always bad. Moderate stress
can help you be more creative, energetic, focused, and productive
• When stress increases beyond our ability to easily cope with it, we begin to feel its negative effects
Copyright – Not to be reproduced. – Provided by Power Link Dynamics TR - 46
7-Steps to Less Stress It’s a Matter of Being FOCUSED©
F – Forgiving of others and yourself O – Organized – invest time wisely C – Consistent – develop good habits U – Understanding – show empathyS – Sincere – help others be successful E – Energized – live your dreams D – Determined – never give up
Copyright – Not to be reproduced. – Provided by Power Link Dynamics TR - 47
Your Reality Check
Worth Remembering …
“You can either get FOCUSED or get STUFFED. The choice is yours”
Copyright – Not to be reproduced. – Provided by Power Link Dynamics TR - 48
Thank You Thank you for participating in this workshop. I hope you got your WIIFM.
Brian SmithPower Link Dynamics
[email protected]://briansmithpld.com