Creating Inclusive and Safe
Spaces in Schools for Children &
Families who Identify as Lesbian,
Gay, Bisexual, Transgender and
Queer (LGBTQ)
Kim Simes
Midwest Regional Manager
Early Childhood Conference
UW-Whitewater
April 10, 2015
Introductions
Name
What is your role (teacher, administrator,
etc.)
How long have you been in this role?
When I ask you to describe family, what are
the first three words that come to mind?
About Family Equality Council
Family Equality Council connects, supports, & represents the three million parents who are lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender & queer (LGBTQ) in this country & their six million children.
We are changing attitudes & policies to ensure that all families are respected, loved, & celebrated including families with parents who are LGBTQ.
We are a community of parents & children, grandparents & grandchildren that reaches across this country.
For over 30 years we have raised our children & raised our voices toward fairness for all families.
Why is a session like this one
important for teachers and
administrators?
Most brand
engagement
is still behind
the times.
The modern
family looks
very
differently
than it did 30
years ago.
The New Modern Family
FR
OM
TO
Weve Seen A Seismic Shift Demographics Pop Culture Society & Technology
The Times Are Changing
3 Million parents who are LGBTQ &
their 6 Million children live in the U.S.
today.
500,000+ LGBTQ couples are
raising children who are adopted
Only 4% of todays families fall into the
Census definition of traditional
There is at least one LGBTQ couple in
93% of counties
92% of Census tracts
*US Census data, 2010
Whats New?
On Feb 27, 2013, respected demographer Gary Gates of the Williams Institute
released a new research brief * that analyzes data sources to provide a clearer
demographic portrait of lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender (LGBT)
parenting in the United States.
Data sources include:
The 2008/2010 General Social Survey,
The Gallup Daily Tracking Survey,
Census 2010,
Census Bureaus 2011 American Community Survey (ACS)
* Research Brief
http://williamsinstitute.law.ucla.edu/wp-content/uploads/LGBT-Parenting.pdf
What the Data Reveals
An estimated 37% of LGBTQ-identified adults have
had a child at some time in their lives.
An estimated 3 million LGBTQ Americans have had a
child and as many as 6 million American children and
adults have an LGBTQ parent.
Among those under age 50 who are living alone or with
a spouse or partner, nearly half of LGBTQ women
(48%) are raising a child under age 18 along with a fifth
of LGBTQ men (20%).
What is True about Our Families
Same-sex couple parents and their children are more
likely to be racial and ethnic minorities,
Same-sex couples raising children are four times more
likely than their different-sex counterparts to be raising a
child who is adopted.
LGBTQ individuals and same-sex couples raising
children face greater economic challenges than their
non-LGBTQ counterparts, reporting household incomes
near the poverty threshold.
Childrearing among same-sex couples is most common in Southern, Mountain West, and Midwest regions of the country. States with the highest proportions of same-sex couples raising biological, adopted or step children include Mississippi (26%), Wyoming (25%), Alaska (23%), Idaho (22%), and Montana (22%).
Terminology
LGBTQ*
Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, Queer,
Questioning*
Sometimes written as GLBTQ or LGBTQ
GSA
Gay Straight Alliance
Services & Resources
Ask the Experts
The Book Nook
Snap It & Send It
Website
On-line store
Getting People Connected
International Family Equality Day
Pride Events
Families in the Midwest
Family Week
Family Camp
Family Weekend at Gay Days Anaheim
Outspoken Generation
International supermodel, Josephine Skriver
Provided testimony in the 2013 Supreme Court cases
Featured on The Katie Couric Show, in the Huffington
Post, and on NPR
The White House has honored three members of
during the prestigious annual White House event for
Emerging Leaders in the LGBTQ Community
National publications, such as The Advocate and
Cosmopolitan Magazine, have shared stories of the
Outspoken Generation members
Outspoken Generation program has received
significant media coverage, in outlets including Perez
Hilton, Towleroad, Good as You, Joe.My.God, The
Take Away, & CBN News.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MJnkp6D3j7chttp://www.familyequality.org/equal_family_blog/2014/04/03/1801/danish_supermodel_josephine_skriver_joins_the_outspoken_generation_programhttp://www.familyequality.org/equal_family_blog/2014/04/03/1801/danish_supermodel_josephine_skriver_joins_the_outspoken_generation_programhttp://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/04/06/zach-wahls-outspoken-generation-ella-robinson-gay-parents_n_1408703.htmlhttp://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/04/06/zach-wahls-outspoken-generation-ella-robinson-gay-parents_n_1408703.htmlhttp://perezhilton.com/2012-04-06-zach-wahls-speaks-out-on-behalf-of-the-family-equality-council.T39OHpltbsYhttp://perezhilton.com/2012-04-06-zach-wahls-speaks-out-on-behalf-of-the-family-equality-council.T39OHpltbsYhttp://www.towleroad.com/2012/04/wahlsia.htmlhttp://www.goodasyou.org/good_as_you/2012/04/video-nom-was-looking-to-investigate-kids-of-gay-parents-family-equality-council-did-it-for-them.html?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed:+GoodAsYou+(Good+As+You)http://joemygod.blogspot.com/2012/04/zach-wahls-outspoken-generation.htmlhttp://www.thetakeaway.org/story/277677-growing-gay-parents/http://www.thetakeaway.org/story/277677-growing-gay-parents/http://m.cbn.com/cbnnews/us/2013/March/Defining-Moment-Same-Sex-Marriage-Hearings-Begin/
Pearls of Wisdom
The Pearls of Wisdom program is
designed to empower grandparents
and more experienced members of our
community to share their experiences
with other families where the parent(s)
identify as LGBTQ.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RmS4iOJ0m0Q
On a scale of 1-10, how would you rate your
classroom, school, program on inclusivity for
a student or families with LGBTQ parents?
Why is it important to have
safe and inclusive
classrooms and spaces,
especially as it relates to
LGBTQ issues?
Its the law!
5 Main Areas where students & families feel
included or NOT:
1. Forms
2. Environment
3. Collected works
4. Language
5. Marketing
Forms
One of the problems: FormsMay Not Seem
Important, Unless the Form Doesnt Fit You or
Your Family!
On the next slide is an example of how
something that seems as simple as a form can
make families with parents who are LGBTQ* feel
as if they dont belong
Forms
One of the problems:
FormsMay Not Seem Important,
Unless the Form Doesnt Fit You
or Your Family!
"FORMS ARE OFTEN A CHALLENGE FOR CHILDREN
WITH PARENTS WHO ARE LGBTQ. THEY CAN BE
ALMOST A DAILY REMINDER THAT MY FAMILY IS NOT
CONSIDERED 'VALID', WHENEVER I HAVE TO FILL OUT
YET ANOTHER FORM THAT ASKS FOR 'MOTHER' AND
'FATHER' INFORMATION. I HOPE FUTURE
GENERATIONS WILL NOT EVEN HAVE TO FACE SUCH
DAILY DOSES OF DISCRIMINATION."
-Lizzy Hurley, Age 19
What do the forms at
your school look like?
What other forms do
you complete that are
not inclusive of all
families?
What can YOU do?
Snap It & Send It!
Environment
Classroom
Lunch room
Play ground
Bathrooms
Hallways
Activities
Buses
Collected Works
Books
Music
Assignments
The Book Nook
Language
Assumptions
Expectations
Validations
Language
Not Ideal
Moms & Dads
Boys & Girls
Husband/wife
Bride/groom
Ideal
Parents
Kids, friends, explorers
Partner/spouse
Couples
Marketing
If you promote outside family events, make
sure they are inclusive for all families
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cBC-pRFt9OM&list=PL5xIVbWXv_LmTQg-sekGRL8yCj7ljOm0Ehttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_DXVtgnAoIQ#aid=P9hqU586m6Y
Forms, Environments, Collective Works,
Language what questions do you have?
Questions for an parent who identifies as part
of the LGBTQ community who has two
children, both whom have gone through early
childhood education and the early years of
public schools?
What do you see as roadblocks for
implementing an inclusive environment in your
setting?
What do you do when you have that inclusive
environment and another parent complains that
they dont want their child exposed to those
kinds of people?
What Can I Do as a Teacher or What
Can I Share with Pre-Service Teachers?
Firsttake the time to look through the Family Equity Councils publications related to making schools inclusive:
Opening Doors
Watch the language that you use
Try to always use partner rather than boyfriend/girlfriend,
husband, wife, spouse important to use partner not just
when talking about people who are LGBTQ*
Be careful of the kidding with children concerning crushes
people who are LGBTQ* often know at a very early age that
they are different
http://www.familyequality.org/_asset/wmr0h2/OpeningDoors2011.pdf
What Else?
Start a Safe Zone Project in your school
Put up rainbows and pink triangles in your
classroom (both are seen as universal symbols of
safety in the LGBTQ* community)
Put up pictures of families that could be viewed as
parents of the same sex
Find literature (at the age level that you are
teaching) which depicts parents of the same sex
How Can I Change the Curriculum?
Make sure to have multiple male/female dolls in many
colors in an area where children would be playing family
(i.e., a dollhouse or Little People)
Think carefully about the songs you sing (lyrics
implying/assuming mom/dad)
Include the families of all children (pictures around the
classroom, discussions at group time, etc.)
Work diligently not to continue gender stereotypes (girls
always do.., boys dont do.. for children whose
parents are LGBTQ* these stereotypes will probably not
be consistent with their experiences)
Some More Ideas
Spend time on the GLSEN (gay lesbian and straight education network) website incredible resources
http://www.glsen.org
Start a GSA (Gay Straight Alliance) at your school
http://www.gsanetwork.org/
Visit HRCs Welcoming Schools website
Watch Its Elementary a video which shows school
personnel (from elementary through secondary) teaching
about LGBTQ* issues
http://newday.com/films/Its_Elementary.html
http://www.glsen.org/http://www.gsanetwork.org/http://www.welcomingschools.org/http://newday.com/films/Its_Elementary.htmlhttp://newday.com/films/Its_Elementary.html
What are the next steps for your action plan?
One more?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q4aV4rEDD2M
Thank you for your time and the work
you will do to create welcoming
spaces for families like mine !
Contact information:
Kim Simes 608.576.8257
mailto:[email protected]:[email protected]:[email protected]:[email protected]:[email protected]