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Yorkshire Cancer Patient Forum News www.yorkshirecancerpatientforum.co.uk
Welcome to the second edition of the Yorkshire Cancer Patient Forum News. You told us in the Forum Membership Survey that you would like a Forum Newsletter. We hope to produce newsletters on a quarterly basis. If you have any ideas for articles or you have a feature you would like to submit, please contact [email protected]. Remember too, that you can follow us on Facebook or Twitter. Also don’t forget our website www.yorkshirecancerpatientforum.co.uk
Come along to our Christmas Forum Get Together on Thursday 7 December for an informal chat and bite to eat. We will be meeting between 11 am – 1pm in the Conservatory at St George’s Conference Centre, 60 Great George Street, Leeds LS1 3DL. To book a place, the link to Eventbrite is below, and it’s important you book a place if you intend to come for lunch, as we will need accurate figures for refreshments. You can also email me to book a place [email protected] There will be no formal presentations, but we’ll have facilitated table discussions on the following themes:
• Community Panel – an exciting new development with the West Yorkshire & Harrogate Cancer Alliance
• Forthcoming events – what would you like to see? • Training/Learning/Support – what do you need? • Website & social media • General Forum information – including how to join our steering
group There’ll also be the opportunity to have a tour of the Crypt and find out more about St George’s Crypt and its work with the homeless, the vulnerable and those suffering from addiction.
To book a place, please go to: www.eventbrite.co.uk/e/christmas-get-together
Yorkshire Cancer Patient Forum News
November 2017
Christmas Forum Get Together
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The steering group is recruiting new members. This is a small and friendly group which meets in central Leeds every two months. The steering group will look at the bigger picture and how the Forum connects with its strategic partners such as the Cancer Alliances and the Sustainability and Transformation Partnerships (STPs). The steering group also ensures:
The Forum provides a voice for cancer patients and their carers in Yorkshire and Humber
Their views and experiences are heard and help to shape and influence services
Cancer support groups are linked into the Forum and are offered support. The first meeting in the New Year is on Monday 5 February from 11 am – 1pm and will be held in the Community Hub room, fourth floor, John Lewis, Victoria Gate, Leeds, LS2 7AR. Anyone who would like to discuss what this would entail can come along to the Christmas Forum meeting on 7 December and have a chat Or call or email Jill Long. 07715 217845 or [email protected]
Public and Patient Involvement Group for South Asian people with cancer and their families and carers – My name is Amrit, I’m from the University of Leeds and I’m interested in setting up a patient involvement group for people from South Asian backgrounds to hear about their experiences of cancer and cancer health services in Yorkshire. We’re especially interested in hearing from people who have been living with cancer as a long term illness – that is for more
than five years. We don’t know enough about the cancer experiences of this population and we’d like to find out more. If you think you might be interested or would like some more information, contact me by email – [email protected] or call 0113 3437551.
Would you be interested in giving us some of your time and expertise to help run
the Yorkshire Cancer Patient Forum?
Can you help?
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National cancer charities rely on patients to act as ambassadors, raising awareness in their own geographic patch.One such volunteer is Alan Stirling, who volunteers for Prostate Cancer UK, and who attended an event organized by North Lincolnshire Council aimed at Health Champions in the workplace. Alan is a member of the Yorkshire Cancer Patient Forum and of the Hull & East Riding Prostate Cancer Support Group. He only discovered he had prostate cancer when he continually felt fatigued. Initially he put it down to the fact that he had recently retired and he had bought a house with one acre of land. Following tests, he was diagnosed with the cancer, even though he couldn’t remember having any symptoms. Alan travels all over East Yorkshire and North Lincolnshire giving presentations to raise awareness.
Considering it’s so common, there is still little knowledge about this cancer. Two out of three adults don’t know where the prostate is. It’s a gland, underneath the bladder, and only men have a prostate. Its main job is to make semen. It’s equal in size to a walnut. What can go wrong?
• An enlarged prostate – the most common prostate problem • inflammation or infection – most common in younger and middle aged men • Prostate cancer – when cancer cells start to grow in an uncontrolled way
Common symptoms of a prostate problem: • Needing to pee more often than usual, day or night • Difficulty going for a pee • A weak flow • Needing to rush to pee • Feeling that you haven’t emptied your bladder properly • Dribbling urine
It’s Movember – the movement to support Prostate Cancer, Testicular Cancer and
Suicide Prevention. Here we look at Prostate Cancer.
Who is at risk? One in eight men will get prostate cancer If you’re black, you’re at double the risk Prostate cancer mainly affects men over 50 You are 2.5 times more likely to get prostate cancer if your father or brother
has had it. Around 42,000 men are diagnosed with prostate cancer in the UK each year
In total over 300,000 men are living with and after prostate cancer in the UK
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Symptoms can be similar for prostate cancer and non-cancerous prostate problems. Most men with early stage prostate cancer have not symptoms at all. No one knows how to prevent prostate cancer, but staying a healthy weight may be important. Research shows that being overweight or obese increase your risk of getting cancer that’s more likely to spread. If you think you’re at risk, or might have a problem, what should you do?
• See your GP • There is no single test to diagnose the cancer • You may have a urine test • Or a PSA test – a blood test which can measure the total amount of prostate specific
antigen in your blood. A raised PSA level may show that you have a problem, but not necessarily cancer.
• A digital rectal examination – uncomfortable – but one way the GP can identify problems with the prostate
Treatment options:
• Prostate cancer often grows slowly and has a low risk of spreading, so it may never cause any problems or shorten your life.
• The cancer can be monitored with regular check ups instead. • Options can include surgery or hormone treatment. • Prostate Cancer UK has an informative website at prostatecanceruk.org and can send
out publications free of charge.They also have specialist nurses available on 0800 074 8383
Wilf Baker, chair of PROCAS Lincolnshire & Humber Wilf discovered he had prostate cancer in 2012, and because he was over 70, surgery was not an option. He has had hormone therapy, and joining his local support group, PROCAS, has also played a part in his wellbeing. He said while only men have a prostate, if they have a partner or a wife, it affects the women as much as the men. As a couple he and his wife were both fearful after his diagnosis. He was worried about leaving his family behind,
while his wife was equally worried about having to take over the household tasks that Wilf used to consider his own. The support group is somewhere people understand your problems and worries because prostate cancer has affected their lives too. The group also offer the option of telephone support. PROCAS meet the third Monday of every month, except December, from 6.30pm at St Bernadette’s Parish Centre, Ashby Road, Scunthorpe, DN16 2RS. Call 07922 487824 or email [email protected]
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When Hospice Chaplain Hazel Featherstone was going through treatment and surgery for metastatic bowel cancer, she wished she had other patients to talk to. The cancer diagnosis had knocked her off her feet. By the time it was discovered, the cancer had spread extensively to her liver and so bowel surgery was not possible until a course of chemotherapy had been undertaken to see if the Liver spread could be halted sufficiently to make surgery a viable option. At that stage her chances of survival were rated as very low, but Hazel says that it is thanks to the skills of the oncology and surgical teams at the Leeds Teaching Hospital Trust she has lived to tell the tale and she and her family are eternally grateful to them. Diagnosis was followed by a tough twelve months of chemotherapy and three lots of surgery but Hazel felt really well supported during all this and throughout the long road of recovery by both the District nursing team and the Community team from St Gemma’s Hospice who helped her back on her feet. Throughout the rollercoaster of events Hazel commented many times, to those looking after her, that what would really have helped her, would have been the opportunity to speak to other patients who were perhaps a little bit further along the journey to compare notes with. To keep her going on the hard days, giving her a positive goal to work towards and to assure her she was making good progress. But, sadly, there didn’t seem to be any such support available locally and people jokingly said she would have to start one up herself, which, when she was so exhausted, at the time was quite laughable; but the seed of an idea was sown!
A few months after her final surgery, on a visit to the follow up clinic, Hazel met Lynda Castle, one of the Colo-rectal Nurse Specialists who had started a Bowel support Group at the Robert Ogden Centre based at St James’ Hospital in Leeds and she invited Hazel to attend. Hazel found the group really helpful, being a good place to share thoughts, feelings and side effects of surgery with fellow patients who were at various stages of the cancer surgery and who understood each other as no one other than a fellow patient can. As a result that seed of an idea she had months earlier began to grow.
Hazel Featherstone – The Hub
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Hazel felt that not all patients may want to attend a group at the hospital having spent so much time there receiving treatment etc, but recognised the need to be easily accessible with good transport links which is why she decided that Crossgates in East Leeds would fit the bill. She also felt that for some people a more informal set up might be more appealing and so came up with the idea of a “Drop in” format. And so The Hub, Crossgates Cancer Support Drop In, was born. That was three years ago, and on the day I visited, the group celebrated their birthday with delicious home-made cakes. The Hub is an informal and welcoming cancer support drop in, which meets each month at Crossgates Methodist Church. It is for anyone affected by any type of cancer either currently or in the past, and their carers and friends are welcome too. In fact some carers continue to visit after their loved one has died, as they feel so comfortable within the group. When Hazel set up the group, she invited volunteers to help who had experienced caring for people with cancer including a number who have a background in nursing or caring and counseling professions. People can go along and enjoy a sandwich and drink, all free of charge, along with the opportunity to chat and make friends with fellow patients. Hazel was keen the support group shouldn’t feel intimidating or depressing. She welcomes each newcomer, and there is always a friendly ear for each visitor who needs a little one to one time. There is also the opportunity to have a hand or foot massage to ease away any stress! Visitors sit around tables for a cuppa on arrival, and no one feels left out. There are guest speakers planned for some meetings, but there is always time for visitors to support one another. Hazel explained that a support group is that supportive network, where patients can just be themselves. They don’t feel they have to put on a brave face, if they don’t want to, but there is always lots of laughter too and the aim is that everyone goes home feeling brighter than when they arrived! Hazel also keeps The Hub updated on patient participation events and new information and feeds patient opinions into the local Living With And Beyond Cancer working group, where she is a patient representative. She has been a member of Yorkshire Cancer Patient Forum for several years. The Hub meets the first Monday of every month from 11 am – 1pm at Crossgates Methodist Church. You can find the group on www.facebook.com/thehubcrossgates
New visitors are always welcome
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The Weston Park Cancer Support Centre in Sheffield, has identified fatigue as a huge unmet need for people living with and beyond cancer. In response, they have created The Fatigue Working Party. The group consists of people affected by cancer and healthcare professionals, including doctors, nurses, occupational therapists, dieticians and the manager of the chronic fatigue service. The group are working together with the aim of improving awareness of cancer related fatigue and are currently creating an e-Learning resource to be launched in the autumn. Hannah Hall, Service Development and Information Lead, said they were keen to create a proper pathway for cancer patients with chronic fatigue which could be replicated elsewhere. Patients could be taught coping strategies, similar to the service currently offered to ME patients. At the moment there is no obvious route for cancer patients with fatigue, even though it is a common problem.
If you would like to contribute to the Fatigue Working Party by attending, or supplying a case study, please contact Hannah Hall at [email protected]
In the last newsletter we told you about John Nathan who was celebrating his 70th birthday by trekking in aid of Pancreatic Cancer in America. He was part of a group of twenty all raising money for pancreatic cancer, most of whom were bereaved relatives and friends. He spent five days hiking in Arizona and Utah, sleeping under canvas except for one night in a Navajo Hogan (mud and wood teepee shaped dwelling). Most of the treks were in Monument Valley and Zion National Park.
“It was a very tough venture for me, not helped by a respiratory virus, very cold nights and mornings, sunrise starts and hot and sandy hikes, “ said John. “ The group and guides were very supportive and got me through it, even though I was last on the final uphill trek, and thoroughly exhausted.” John raised nearly £7000 and the group overall must have raised well over £50000 for this worthwhile cause.
Cancer related fatigue is a regular topic for discussion within support groups
Update on John Nathan
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Every week, Macmillan Grants help over 600 people. Since 1924 Macmillan Grants have been helping people meet the financial needs that can arise from cancer or its treatment. Typically grants are under £400. Macmillan grants can help meet a wide range of practical needs arising from cancer, such as to:
Purchase new clothes needed because of changes to body shape or size
Paying high heating bills incurred when more susceptible to feeling cold during chemotherapy
Cover the cost of a much needed short holiday in the UK.
They can also help with more specific requests that will help improve a person’s comfort or quality of life.
To be considered for a grant, a patient must be able to meet the eligibility criteria;
Have a cancer diagnosis, or still be affected by cancer or its treatment
Be a UK resident
Have not more than £6,000 in savings ( as an individual) or £8,000 savings (if a couple of family)
Have a low income ( see website for more details)
The request for a grant must demonstrate a clear link to the impact of cancer and its treatment
All grant applications must be supported by two professionals acting on behalf of a person affected by cancer. If you would like to submit a grant application on behalf of a patient and have not submitted a grant application before, email [email protected] for an application form. All details are on the Macmillan website: www.macmillan.org.uk/ General enquiries: 020 7091 2476
Macmillan Grant Applications
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Maggie Watts is a woman on a mission – to raise awareness of pancreatic cancer. She is well-known within the cancer world for achieving 100,000 signatures within one year to trigger a Government debate to get more funding for the cancer, and to get more information in the
public arena. Maggie, who comes from Scunthorpe in North Lincolnshire, is passionate about her cause because she doesn’t want any other family to go through what she has suffered. In 2008, her fit and healthy husband, Kevin began to have vague symptoms which he put down to catching a chill while working outdoors. Other than a persistent back pain, he lost a lot of weight rapidly. Months went by until tests revealed he had an inoperable tumour, with only a limited time left. Kevin wanted to
fight for as long as possible, and his goal was to outlive the 18 months his oncologist estimated he may survive. Kevin achieved his goal and died six weeks after the 18 months he had been given. He managed to pack fundraising and the Great South Run into his last months, despite his oncologist’s advice. But what shook Maggie to the core was that Kevin died in 2009. Forty years earlier, in 1969, Kevin’s mother, Jean, died of pancreatic cancer leaving three young children behind. “Forty years and still the medics offer no better chance of survival,” said Maggie. “What stands still for forty years?” And it was this sense of outrage, which drove Maggie to start her e-petition, as she battled to find something to pour her energies into. Maggie was helped by the support of Coronation Street actress, Julie Hesmondhalgh, whose soap character, Haley Cropper, was facing pancreatic cancer. With Julie’s support, and from other celebrities like Joey Barton, Maggie made it to the 100,000 target with just three days to spare. This prompted a three hour Parliamentary debate, with cross party support, led by Maggie’s MP and great supporter, Nic
Hope Is Contagious – Maggie Watts
The facts about Pancreatic Cancer
Pancreatic cancer is the UK’s fifth biggest cancer killer
Pancreatic cancer affects men and women equally.
Nearly 9,000 people are diagnosed in the UK each year.
Half of all patients are diagnosed as an emergency
Currently only 5% of those diagnosed survive beyond five years
71% of people didn’t know one single symptom, in a survey carried out by Pancreatic Cancer UK
Signs to be aware of:
Low mood or depression
Persistent indigestion
Abdominal pain possibly radiating to the back
Jaundice
Change in stools – that don’t flush easily
Unexplained weight loss
Diabetes – new onset and not associated with weight gain
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Dakin which achieved a promise of greater funding and more symptom information. Historically, pancreatic cancer attracted less than 1% of research funding. In 2015, Cancer Research UK tripled spending on pancreatic research from £6million to £18 million. But Maggie was not content to sit back. Using a strapline from her e-petition, she launched the #HopeIsContagious campaign. A purple teardrop shaped badge (the colour associated with pancreatic cancer) and wristband is available from www.hopeiscontagious.co.uk. Scottish Rugby Union player, Stuart Hogg, Julie Hesmondhalgh and Emmerdale’s Chris Chittell have shown their support of the campaign by sporting a hope badge.
on Facebook and Twitter. You can also follow #HopeIsContagious
When Norman Howe originally planned his Brave the Shave in aid of Macmillan Cancer Support, his inspiration was his step-son in hospital with penile cancer. Sadly by the time his head shave had taken place, Paul Humphrey (37) had lost his fight against the cancer which rarely affects younger men. Norman, who is a carer and volunteer for the Carers Support Centre, Grimsby, didn’t have his hair cut during 2017 until his head shave this summer at Limelight Salon, Grimsby. The money raised from his head shave and from donations at Paul’s funeral came to more than £800.
Norman says he is really pleased to have been able to do something in Paul’s memory. Paul was only diagnosed in August 2016, and spent 45 weeks bedridden in Grimsby hospital. He couldn’t be treated with chemotherapy because of his weight. He was 45 stones when admitted to hospital, but had managed to lose 12 stones. Unfortunately, the cancer had already spread, and Paul never got his dream of being able to walk out of hospital. Norman said it is a rare cancer, but particularly rare in younger men. It is a cancer that no one talks about. Further information is available on the Macmillan website at www.macmillan.org.uk
Norman Braves the Shave
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This was the first event organized by Yorkshire Cancer Patient Forum for breast cancer patients. We chose October as it was Breast Cancer Awareness Month. Five different groups from North Yorkshire, West Yorkshire and Lincolnshire came together. The original idea for the day came from Zoe Bounds, chair of Breast Friends York, and a Forum steering group member. She said having a cancer diagnosis is extremely isolating, but it can also be
isolating running a support group, and feeling you have the weight of the group on your shoulders. She wanted to get together with other people who ran groups to find out from them, what works, and what are their challenges. As a Forum we were keen to learn from support groups about any tips we could pass on to member groups, and to learn
from individuals about any reason they had not sought out group support. We’ll be producing a hints and tips guide to running a support group based on the day’s findings. In our photograph, participants are led by Charlotte, through a series of stretching and breathing exercises
Sarah has a background in employment rights and is based with Leeds Occupational Health Advisory Service.
She explained that as people are living with and beyond cancer, many people are thinking about returning to work once their treatment is complete.
This can be a daunting and difficult stage. They may not be fully recovered both physically and emotionally, and employees can feel under pressure to return sooner than they would have planned.
Sarah can talk to patients and employers about patient needs. She finds most employers are helpful, but they do not necessarily know employment law. Sarah is there to help provide the information. She can visit a patient at hospital, at home or at their GP practice. She can also talk through with individuals their fears about returning below par, when colleagues may expect them to ‘be back to normal’.
Sarah can be contacted on 0113 345 3303 or on 07469 396988
Breast Cancer Support event – bringing different groups together
Helping you to get back to work - Sarah Mitchell - Macmillan Occupational
Healthcare Adviser
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Cancer has been recognized as a priority in the Humber, Coast and Vale health and care partnership. Almost 20,000 people in Humber, Coast and Vale are diagnosed with cancer each
year; a rate significantly higher than the England average. The National Cancer Taskforce set up 16 Cancer Alliances across England to improve cancer survival rates. Humber, Coast and Vale are one of these Cancer Alliances bringing together health and care partners to focus on:
Prevention Early diagnosis Quality of treatment Living with and beyond cancer
Rafael Cicci, is just weeks into his role as Programme Director for the Humber, Coast & Vale Cancer Alliance. He’s an Italian by birth, but having lived here for 22 years, he feels he qualifies sufficiently to be able to complain about the weather with the rest of us. Now based at Health House in Willerby, Hull, he is enthusiastic about the role and the challenge it offers. He is a qualified accountant and economist and began his career with the big commercial banks in The City. He has worked for the NHS for around 20 years moving around the country including London, Buckinghamshire, Oxford, Hampshire, and Dorset. He is now based in Hull, but has been too busy to experience any of the events offered during the UK City of Culture programme. The Cancer Alliance will be tasked with producing a local plan to change the way we deliver cancer services to improve outcomes. It will take a partnership and whole pathway approach to ensure that all patients, wherever they live, receive the same high quality of services.
The Cancer Alliance area brings together six clinical commissioning groups:
East Riding of Yorkshire
Hull
North Lincolnshire
North East Lincolnshire
Scarborough & Ryedale
Vale of York The challenge is to think in terms of a seamless, clinically
led and patient driven health system, not defined or contained by organisational boundaries. Rafael said: “Cancer survival rates are improving across Humber, Coast and Vale. In the ten years between 2004 and 2014, the chance of surviving a year after diagnosis improved from 64% on average to 69.3%. But there is much work still to do. Early diagnosis is crucial to improve survival rates across our region.” One of his early priorities will be to look at ways of putting patients and carers at the centre of all their work.
Rafael Cicci – Director Humber, Coast & Vale Cancer Alliance
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She may be a petite 4 ft 10 inches in stature, but Julie Stott has towering ambitions when it comes to getting cancer patients healthy again. As she demonstrated at a Health and Wellbeing Event organized by Macmillan and Calderdale and Huddersfield NHS Foundation Trust for people who are recovering from cancer. With her infectious laughter and obvious love of movement, Julie succeeded in getting the whole room up on their feet and marching to her tune. Julie is a Macmillan Personal Trainer, a post which she believes is unique. She works in partnership with the hospitals in Huddersfield and Calderdale to offer a tailored course to cancer patients to help them get back on the road to recovery. She understands how patients can feel at the end of treatment.
Worried about every little lump and pain
Being urged by their family to ‘get back to normal’
Often being told they were ‘lucky’ that their cancer was caught at an early stage At this point, their worries are increasing, but their access to their cancer team is decreasing. That’s when Julie’s service at Restart Fitness CIC (Community Interest Company) kicks in. The course discusses in detail cancer related fatigue – the overwhelming tiredness, which is disproportionate to the level of activity. Poor sleep patterns which can potentially lead to low mood. A healthy diet and relaxation methods are also covered. Julie also shows participants how research has proven that if you undertake exercise you recover quicker and have fewer side effects. You also benefit from feel good endorphins which flood the body during exercise. Government recommendations suggest exercising 30 minutes a day, but Julie doesn’t want anyone to get hung up on what exercise means. It doesn’t have to mean a trip to a gym, but is all about moving more often. It could be gardening, cleaning, walking to the shops. She suggests incorporating a little movement into everyday activities such as marching on the spot while waiting for the kettle. Julie is currently recruiting for three daytime courses which will start in the second week of January to run in Halifax (Friday morning), Elland (Thursday morning) and Huddersfield (Monday afternoon). The first step after registering on the course, is to meet Julie or a colleague, for a personal consultation, in which you can discuss your needs. Julie will write a realistic exercise programme for you. The course starts with a gentle warm up, which everyone joins in. Then each participant works at their own pace following their own programme, to be followed by a cool down with everyone working together.
Julie Stott Macmillan Personal Trainer
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The class then have a group discussion covering many of the elements which are troubling patients in recovery. Sessions are two hours long and last for 10 weeks. The classes are free and part of a pilot project which will be evaluated by Macmillan. Julie hopes to be able to offer a wider range of classes in the future, including an evening course. Patients who have taken part were at the Health and Wellbeing Event to feedback:
The best thing I have ever done
I am fitter now than I ever was
I feel top of the world To find out more contact Julie at Restart Fitness on tel: 07584 901236 or email [email protected]
If one of your friends or family members has cancer, you may be wondering the best way to support him or her. Even though you want to help, it can be hard to know what to say or do. Everyone reacts differently to the news that they have cancer. Therefore, some people will see offers of help as ‘fussing’ and will find them hard to accept, while others will really appreciate any help and support being offered. What is important, is to ensure that you take the lead from the poorly person, and accept that they may act and behave differently now. However, there are likely to be many times when help and support is needed. Based on my own experience and feedback from customers, here is a list of simple suggestions of ways you could help:
1. Create a rota between close friends and family members to take your loved one to hospital and treatment appointments. It is so important to know that someone is going to be with you to support you. A rota will ensure everyone knows where and when they are needed and will mean one less thing for them to worry about.
2. Cook a meal, ideally one that can be frozen for a later date so your loved one does not feel obligated to eat it there and then. Maybe ask what they might like to eat as taste buds can be affected especially during chemotherapy. What might have been his or her favourite meal before, may now no longer be.
3. Send frequent messages of love and support, reminding them that you are there for them. Make sure you tell them they don’t need to respond. Sometimes having to respond to text and missed phone calls feel overwhelming and exhausting.
4. Offer to look after the children or walk the dog so that lives of others living in the house have some sense of normality. This also allows them to rest too.
5. Listen rather than talk. They may just need someone to listen to them. It is important that during this emotional time, that if someone wishes to share their worries and fears they can do so.
15 Simple Ways to Make Someone With Cancer Feel Supported And Loved
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6. Organise some special days for when they feel well enough to get out and about. It might be just a visit to a local coffee shop or a short walk in a local beauty spot. Make sure they know that they can return home as and when, it is important not to overdo it.
7. Purchase a gift subscription either individually, or as a group of friends or relatives. This allows those who do not living so close to feel like they are contributing and getting involved.
8. Sometimes just having company even sitting in silence, or watching TV can be enough. Try not to make everything into a big occasion or event.
9. Tend to the garden or water plants. Set a day and time to do so without having to disturb them. Knowing that the garden is being looked after is enough.
10. There will be good and bad days. It is important that you are flexible with your help and support. If dates and times need to be changed then so be it. Cancer, treatment and side effects can be unpredictable.
11. Practical gifts that show you have put thought and attention into what they need. If your loved one says their hands are sore, they are feeling nauseous or are struggling to sleep or rest then find a gift that will help alleviate unwanted side effects. It shows you have listened and gone the extra mile to make them feel more comfortable.
12. Offer to take notes during appointments. Trying to take in information when you are feeling emotional and physically unwell can be extremely hard. Having some notes to refer back to at a later date can help clarify things.
13. Honesty is the best policy. You would have been honest before they got ill, and it is important to be honest now. They are still the same person. If you don’t know what to say or how to react tell them you are finding it hard. They will appreciate you being straight with them.
14. It’s human nature for people to rush in to help at the beginning of a crisis, but having cancer is a long road. Whilst you may no longer be needed to cook meals, or help with lifts, it is still important that you still check in with phone calls, notes or cards so your loved one knows they are still being supported.
15. Cancer is not a contagious disease, so physically show your love and support with a hug and a kiss. Often it is the little things that mean the most.
Anikka Burton is the founder of www.notanotherbunchofflowers.com and was diagnosed with breast cancer at the age of 33. This article was originally in the Huffington Post.
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