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APPLICATION ESSAYS
WHAT IS THE AVERAGE %
OF TIME AN ADMISSION OFFICER
SPENDS ON THE ESSAY PORTION
OF YOUR COLLEGE APPLICATION?
33%
“We are looking for signs of life – a
SENSE OF HUMOR, INTELLETUAL
CURIOSITY, INTERESTING
EXPERIENCES OR PERSPECTIVES.”- DEAN OF ADMISSION, SARAH LAWRENCE COLLEGE
“THE ESSAY GIVES US
SOMETHING THE NUMBERS
DON’T REVEAL.”- DIRECTOR OF ADMISSION, GORDON COLLEGE
“THE ESSAY CAN BE A
POWERFUL ‘TIPPER’IN CLOSE CASES.”- DIRECTOR OF ADMISSION, BATES COLLEGE
WRITING THE COLLEGE
APPLICATION ESSAY:
THE DOs & DON’Ts
DO:
REMEMBER WHAT YOU LEARNED
IN ENGLISH
DON’T:
SOUND TOO FORMAL
OR USE SLANG
Write an essay, not an e-mail or text
Slang terms and a casual tone should
be eliminated
No LOLs, BTWs, etc…
Avoid words such as: very, a lot,
cool, awesome, like, and nice
DO:
KEEP YOUR FOCUS NARROW
If you start with one specific moment
in mind, your writing will be more
organized.
Essays that try to be too
comprehensive end up sounding
watered-down
DON’T:
TELL THE ENTIRE STORY OF
YOUR LIFE
Focus on ONE event
Examples:
A single Christmas Eve mass or Yom
Kippur service
A meal of boiled tongue in Mexico
One day of scooping ice cream at Liks
DO:
GET THEM HOOKED
"My favorite science project
was a complete failure.”
“I have old hands.”
“I change my name every time I order at
Starbucks.”
“As an Indian-American, I am forever
bound to the hyphen.”
DON’T:
BORE THE READER
Admission officers read hundreds of
essays - often skimming and scanning
Your audience is not a bunch of stuffy
old professors!
DO:
KEEP IT
PERSONAL
The college wants to learn more about you, not one of your friends or one of your relatives
It should be your story that can come from only you
Focus on what you have done instead of what you will do
DON’T:
WRITE A RESUME
Don't repeat information that is found elsewhere in the application
Don’t mention your GPA or SAT / ACT scores
No need to review all your extra-curriculars
DON’T:
TELL THEM WHAT YOU THINK
THEY WANT TO HEAR
We’re not looking for a new way to view the world
- they’re looking for a new way to view you, the
applicant
Avoid talking about politics or religion
Don’t be offensive,
cynical, or condescending
No need to flatter
Be sincere
DO:
SHOW – DON’T JUST TELL!
Use examples and facts
Evoke the senses
How did it make you feel or think…
Use the ACTIVE voice Passive: The tray of food was
dropped by me.
Active: I dropped the tray of
food.
Avoid general
words like…Everyone
People
Others
Stuff
Usually
Things
Anyone
All
Always
Anything
DON’T:
USE CLICHÉS If your essay says any (or all!!) of the below,
TAKE THEM OUT: cutting edge
I learned my lesson
I always learn from my mistakes
I know my dreams will come true
I can make a difference
_________ is my passion
I no longer take my loved ones for granted
These lessons are useful both on and off the field (or other sporting arena)
I realize the value of hard work and perseverance
_________ was the greatest lesson of all
I know what it is to triumph over adversity
_________ opened my eyes to a whole new world
DO:
BE CONCISE
No need to use 50 words when 5 will do Too Many Words: “Over the years it has been pointed
out to me by my parents, friends, and teachers—and I have even noticed this about myself, as well—that I am not the neatest person in the world.”
Much Better: “I‘m a slob.”
Don’t use a quote for quote’s sake
Don’t “THESAURUS-IZE” your essay…
You have a limited number of words:
Make them your own!
CONSIDER…
• Be aware if the counselor you have established a
relationship with is the one reading your essay
• Embrace your style and writing ability
• DON’t end with “In conclusion…”
• BEFORE YOU SUBMIT
• Let it sit 2 days before you read it the final time
• Read out loud
• Does it ring true?
• Do YOU like it?
ADDITIONAL RESOURCES
College Board gives great tips about writing a college essay. It
also offers critiques of sample essays.
www.collegeboard.com/student/apply/essay-skills/index.html
www.ApplicationEssaySuccessSystem.com
Veritas Prep
Colleges give great tips:
http://www.admissions.umich.edu/essay/tips/
http://www.virginia.edu/undergradadmission/writingtheessay.h
tml
Connecticut College compiled a number of essays they believe
“worked”:
http://www.conncoll.edu/admission/essays.htm
The University of Chicago is known for its provocative essay
questions – take a look, it could get your creative juices flowing:
https://collegeadmissions.uchicago.edu/apply/essays/
THE COMMON APP QUESTIONS
Some students have a background, identity, interest, or talent that is so
meaningful they believe their application would be incomplete without it.
If this sounds like you, then please share your story.
The lessons we take from failure can be fundamental to later success.
Recount an incident or time when you experienced failure. How did it
affect you, and what did you learn from the experience?
Reflect on a time when you challenged a belief or idea. What prompted
you to act? Would you make the same decision again?
Describe a problem you've solved or a problem you'd like to solve. It can
be an intellectual challenge, a research query, an ethical dilemma-
anything that is of personal importance, no matter the scale. Explain its
significance to you and what steps you took or could be taken to identify
a solution.
Discuss an accomplishment or event, formal or informal, that marked
your transition from childhood to adulthood within your culture,
community, or family.
BRAINSTORMING TOPICS
Topic / Question
Episode,
Event,
Experience
Creativ
e Angle
Tone
Elements of
ethos
First Line
Topic of choice: A day that altered my
perception of control
The day I worked
the bike race at HSU
Patience, flexibility,
ability to adapt
descriptive
anecdote
Move from
humorous
to serious
Sometimes you
just can’t stop
a woman on
a horse.
THE LETTER OF
RECOMMENDATION
WHY IS THIS IMPORTANT TO YOU?
Gives reader more perspective on the
student
Places student in context of the
school
Provides stage lighting vs. spotlight
Reinforces/confirms the application
Validates school report form
Provides one more piece of
information
FIRST THINGS FIRST…
Know what the college
expects/requires
Plan ahead
Make sure the writer knows you well
Interview/meeting
Review activities resume/ brag sheet
Utilize parents and peers
WHO SHOULD WRITE THE LOR?
Academic teacher
Recent (11th or 12th grade)
Positive Interactions
Knows you well
Doesn’t have to be the class you got
an A in
INFORMATION YOU SHOULD PROVIDE
TO YOUR RECOMMENDER
Areas of academic/career interest
College list (Naviance)
Describe self – strengths/weaknesses
Activities in and out of school
Community involvement
Passion
Free time
WHAT’S IMPORTANT?
COUNSELOR VS TEACHER LOR
Teacher- story about individual Specifics of classroom experiences
Success over time
Change in leadership/involvement
Counselor- context of school &
student body Trends in grades over time
Highlight challenging curriculum
Explain glitches
Background info
NEXT STEPS
Think about who you want to write
your LOR
Ask for a positive LOR, far in
advance
Provide all necessary information Deadlines
How to submit
Personalized or general letter
If general, it may be helpful for you to have a copy for your
records if they are comfortable with that.
Show your appreciation!
QUESTIONS?
Brian Zaun
Wartburg College
Carissa Cummins
University of Oklahoma
