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CONGREGATION AM HAYAM
4839 Market Street, Unit C, Ventura, Ca. 93003 Phone (805) 644-2899 Fax (805) 644-2887
Website: www.AmHayam.com
From The Rabbi’s Study—October 2016
From the Rabbi’s Study
Forgiving Those We Have Injured
We all acknowledge the importance of forgiveness and extol the virtues of forgiving others. None-theless, we find it hard at times to exemplify this virtue. The English poet Alexander Pope (1688-1744) wrote, “To err is human; to forgive divine”; however, we might revise his thought and con-clude, “To err is human; to forgive unusual.”
The Tanakh (Bible) records a noble instance of forgiveness when our ancestor Joseph was recon-ciled with his brothers. But even there that forgiveness does not come easily.
Joseph taunts and torments his brothers in many ways that one might rightly consider cruel, until at last he reveals his true identity. He then reassures them, “Now, be not grieved nor angry with your-selves, that you sold me hither; for G!d sent me ahead of you to preserve life….It was not you that sent me here, but G!d” (Genesis 45:5, 8).
Yes, Joseph does ultimately forgive his brothers. But why does he find it so hard to do so?
Well, we often assert, because his brothers hurt him. If Reuben had not interceded, they would have killed him. As it was, they stripped him of his beloved coat of many colors, threw him into the pit, and then sold him as a slave. It’s not easy to forgive such abuse.
But looking over their history as a whole, we discover that another layer to the relationship between these brothers exist and lies large in the background. Therefore, perhaps we should consider anoth-er reason for Joseph’s long delay in forgiving his brothers. He may have had trouble forgiving them not because they had wronged him, but because he had wronged them!
Strange as this may sound, it is true that we frequently develop very strong feelings against people whom we have hurt. Long ago, the Roman historian Tacitus (56-120) wrote, “It is a principle of hu-man nature to hate those whom you have injured.” And Joseph Jacobs, a contemporary historian, declared, “The highest and most difficult of all moral lessons is to forgive those we have injured.”
In Joseph’s case, it was plain that his own inflammatory actions had provoked his brothers’ harsh reactions. In the snapshot that the Tanakh provides we see that Joseph gossiped about his broth-ers, carried tales about them back to their father, had dreams about lording it over them, and was insensitive enough to proclaim those dreams to his brothers. And all the while he strut-ted around in his coat of continued
HAMIGDALOR
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many colors—the tantalizing reminder that he was their father’s favorite, and that he was going to milk that status for all it was worth.
Perhaps it was when Joseph finally faced up to this painful truth that he was able to gather enough strength to admit to himself, if not to anyone else, that the rancor be-tween them was not a one-way street, that he, too, had been an aggressor, and that he indeed had been the offender. Then, and only then, was he able to make peace with his brothers.
Joseph is called Joseph the Righteous in our tradition, and it might just be that he earned this title because he did something we often fail to even consider, let alone do: Admit that in many instances of people whom we declare that we don’t like or whose behavior we deem unforgivable, it is we who have been the offender, and not they alone. Often, like Joseph, we have been the first offender.
Hence, Joseph might serve us as a model of forgiveness during this season of for-giveness. He would urge us to face ourselves honestly and truthfully. We may then be able to forgive those whom we have injured, and gain the reconciliation that we so dearly want.
Before the Gates of Neilah close, may we take off the coat of many colors and tex-tures and postures—the coat of hubris, the coat of perfection, and the coat of stub-bornness among them—so that we can reveal and confront the hurts we have inflict-ed on others. And may this lead us to act, to feel remorse, to reconnect and reconcile. Then this will surely be a good and sweet New Year.
L’shanah tovah u-m’tukah um’lei-ah v’racha tikateivu v’teichateimu b’Sefer Hayyim Tovim. May you and yours be written—and sealed—in the Book of Life, the Book of Good Living, for a good, sweet New Year, a year of blessings.
Rabbi J.B. Sacks
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Message from Brenda Rich
Greetings:
You will probably be receiving the Migdalor during the High Holy Days. I hope you will appreciate all our efforts not
only the Rabbi and Cantorial Soloist Mitzi Schwarz have undertaken to bring you meaningful High Holy Days but
Roz Resnick with her dedication in handing out honors. The smooth running of our services doesn’t just happen.
After the Days of Awe, come the Days of Joy. All out Sukkot services will be at the home of Mort and Roz Resnick.
Call (805) 984-7986 for directions. The services are as follows:
Sunday, October 16th at 6:45p.m.
Monday, October 17th at 10:00 a.m.
Friday, October 21st at 8:00 p.m.
Saturday, October 22nd at 10:00 a.m.
On Sunday, October 23rd, we will be joining with TBT, Ner Ami, and the Jewish Community of Ojai for a Simchat
Torah celebration. Join us as we dance, sing, study, pray and rejoice together. Rabbi Sacks and Cantorial Soloist
Mitzi Schwarz will be participating. TBT is at 7620 Foothill Rd.
Rabbi Sacks led a fantastic class on High Holy Days around the world. We learned of different traditions, follow-
ings and food. We sang songs and everyone enjoyed themselves and came away with a new respect for traditions
around the world.
Rabbi Sacks will be holding another class on Sunday, November 6th at 1:30 p.m. at the home of Arnie and Brenda
Rich. The class will be on food and community. Rabbi JB Sacks will offer a cooking demonstration that will add to
your own recipes and memories. Save the date.
Fran Lande led a most interesting discussion of the book The Torah Revolution: Fourteen Truths that Changed the
World by Rabbi Reuven Hammer, PhD. There were lively discussions, good participation by the attendees and all
left a little wiser.
There will be 4 additional sessions presented by the Adult Education Significant Book Club starting on Sunday,
December 18 at 1 p.m. at the home of Arnie and Brenda Rich. The book will be The Collected Stories by Grace
Pally. Save the date.
Todah Rabah to all those who sent in donations over and above their yearly dues. CAH is always in need of extra
financial assistance.
The Ways and Means committee had a very successful fund raiser – Apples, Honey and More. Thanks to all who
participated in this event. Kudos to Fran Lande and Ruth Resnick for coordinating this event.
Andrea Massion and her Ways and Means committee will be bringing to us for our enjoyment in 2017 an empow-
ering, provocative, thoughtful series of 3 compelling speakers. So save the dates of
Thursday, February 16th
Wednesday, March 22nd
Sunday, April 30th
Arnie and I want to wish you and yours a good and sweet year.
Shanah Tova U’Metukah
Shalom,
Brenda Rich
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Mondays with Mort
.
During the month of October there will NOT be any sessions of Mondays With Mort at
CAH.
Question of the Month:
We dip apples into honey on Rosh Hashanah. What do the apples represent?
The answers can be found at http://www.mondayswithmort.com/doyouknow.htm, Also be
sure to check out the entire Mondays with Mort web site at http://
www.mondayswithmort.com and the CAH web site at www.amhayam.com .
Rabbi Sacks, The Board of Directors
and the Membership of Congregation Am HaYam
extend our sincere condolences to
Judy Margolis and Family
on the passing of their beloved
Husband, Father, Grandfather
Mort Margolis.
Mort was truly a mensch. He was an ardent supporter of CAH even though he and Judy
lived in Beverly Hills. Whenever they were able they came to their part-time home in
Oxnard and attended our services. They supported all our events, monetarily and physi-
cally.
Mort always had a smile on his face and never had an unkind word for anyone.
He will be greatly missed.
May his memory be for a blessing.
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October Birthday’s
If your birthday or anniversary is not acknowledged please email me at
October Anniversaries
NANCY & HERB STEIN 11
RENEE & JEF BRATSPIS 18
GIL BRATSPIS 20
ANN SPERBER 26
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Sukkot Services
Please note that Sukkot Services will be held
at the home of Roz and Mort Resnick
on the following dates and times:
Sunday night, October 16th at 6:45 PM
Monday morning. October 17th at 10:00 AM
Friday night, October 21st at 8:00 PM
Saturday morning October 22nd at 10:00 AM
Please call (805) 984-7986 if you need directions.
Mort and I wish you and yours a
Shanah Tova U’Metukah (A good and sweet year)!
CAH and I thank all who made donations over their dues:
VOLUNTARY CONTRIBUTIONS:
Betty & Neal Abramson
Bob Berman
Sydell & Bernie Bubman
Neill & Arnie Fingerhut
Stephen Goch
Eva Lowe
Judy & Mort Margolis
Ruth Resnick
Brenda & Arnie Rich
Martha Zoloth
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Trees Planted In Israel
In Memory Of
In Honor Of
Tributes
Alma Golden IMO Harry Boronkay
Ruth Resnick IMO David Finkel
Borah & Marcia Perlmutter IMO David Perlmutter
Herb & Nancy Stein IMO David Cohen
Judy Margolis IMO Fannie Sherman
Ruth Resnick IMO Leo Rosen
Eva Lowe IHO Shabbat Nachamu
The Kozak Family IHO CAH
Stan Golab IHO CAH
Ruth Atlas IHO Arnold & Brenda Rich
Reardon Funeral Home IHO CAH by sponsorship of Yizkor Booklets
Eva Lowe IHO CAH - Apples for Apples, Honey and More Bags
IN HONOR OF CAH
IN MEMORY OF
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Thank you to all who supported the
Apples, Honey and More fund raiser
Fil Barton
Bob Berman
The Bratspis Family
Sydell & Bernie Bubman
Stephen Goch
Alma Golden
Marc Goldman
Donna Gustafson
Ann & Irv Jacobs
Elaine Hanig
Lois Lebman
Eva Lowe
Miriam & Darryl Mack
Andrea Massion
Judye & Rick Newberger
Roz & Mort Resnick
Ruth Resnick
Dianna & Rick Rice
Brenda & Arnie Rich
Yulma Rodarte
Bev & Fred Rosen
Lee & Milt Rothschild
Miriam Rubinstein
Rabbi Sacks & Steven
Esther Taxon
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CHAVURAH INTEREST
The Membership Committee is sending you this form to discover if you have an interest in joining a
Chavurah. A Chavurah is a small group of families, couples or individuals who share common inter-
ests and desires. These groups meet together, usually monthly, to study, socialize, cook, camp, or
participate in any other activities. Each group sets their own schedule and plans their own activities.
A Chavurah is a wonderful way to build and nurture strong friendships within our Congregation Am
HaYam family extending beyond the schedule of community services and events
After receiving back this questionnaire, an organizational meeting will be set to get everyone together
to make further plans.
Name(s)________________________________________________________________________
Address_________________________________________________________________________
Phone #______________________________________ Email______________________________
Name and age of other members in your household______________________________________
Please circle age group you prefer: 30 -39 40-59 Over 60
Please circle the situation that best applies to you and your family:
Single Adult Adults Only Family (events with children) Other___________________
What type of events do you expect from a Chavurah (e.g. Judaic Studies; Social Activities; Sporting
events; Discussion groups; Jewish cooking; Book groups; Theater groups, other Interests?)
Please fill out this form and return it to: Brenda Rich; 4030 Nice Court; Oxnard, CA 93035
FORM AVAILABLE DIGITALLY AT www.amhayam.com
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ADULT EDUCATION PRESENTS SIGNIFICANT BOOK CLUB
1. The first event is Sunday December 18, 2016 at 1 pm at Brenda and Arnie's House.
The book is The Collected Stories by Grace Paley.
This reissue of Grace Paley's classic collection―a finalist for the National Book Award―demonstrates her rich use of language as well as her extraordinary insight into and compassion for her characters, moving from the hilarious to the tragic and back again. Whether writing about the love (and conflict) between parents and children or between husband and wife, or about the struggles of aging single mothers or disheartened political organizers to make sense of the world, she brings the same unerring ear for the rhythm of life as it is actually lived.
The Collected Stories is a 1994 National Book Award Finalist for Fiction.
2.The Kidnapping of Edgardo Mortara by David Kertze
The extraordinary story of how the vatican's imprisonment of a six-year-old Jewish boy in 1858 helped to bring about the collapse of the popes' worldly power in Italy.
Bologna: nightfall, June 1858. A knock sounds at the door of the Jewish merchant Momolo Mortara. Two officers of the Inquisition bust inside and seize Mortara's six-year-old son, Edgardo. As the boy is wrenched from his fa-ther's arms, his mother collapses. The reason for his abduction: the boy had been secretly "baptized" by a family servant. According to papal law, the child is therefore a Catholic who can be taken from his family and delivered to a special monastery where his conversion will be completed.
With this terrifying scene, prize-winning historian David I. Kertzer begins the true story of how one boy's kidnap-ping became a pivotal event in the collapse of the Vatican as a secular power. The book evokes the anguish of a modest merchant's family, the rhythms of daily life in a Jewish ghetto, and also explores, through the revolution-ary campaigns of Mazzini and Garibaldi and such personages as Napoleon III, the emergence of Italy as a mod-ern national state. Moving and informative, the Kidnapping of Edgardo Mortara reads as both a historical thriller and an an authoritative analysis of how a single human tragedy changed the course of history.
3.Six Days of War by Michael Oren
Though it lasted for only six tense days in June, the 1967 Arab-Israeli war never really ended. Every crisis that has ripped through this region in the ensuing decades, from the Yom Kippur War of 1973 to the ongoing intifada, is a direct consequence of those six days of fighting. Michael B. Oren’s magnificent Six Days of War, an interna-tionally acclaimed bestseller, is the first comprehensive account of this epoch-making event.
Writing with a novelist’s command of narrative and a historian’s grasp of fact and motive, Oren reconstructs both the lightning-fast action on the battlefields and the political shocks that electrified the world. Extraordinary person-alities—Moshe Dayan and Gamal Abdul Nasser, Lyndon Johnson and Alexei Kosygin—rose and toppled from power as a result of this war; borders were redrawn; daring strategies brilliantly succeeded or disastrously failed in a matter of hours. And the balance of power changed—in the Middle East and in the world. A towering work of history and an enthralling human narrative, Six Days of War is the most important book on the Middle East con-flict to appear in a generation.
4. In My Brother's Image by Eugene Pogany is the extraordinary story of Eugene Pogany's father and uncle-identical twin brothers born in Hungary of Jewish parents but raised as devout Catholic converts until the Second World War unraveled their family. In eloquent prose, Pogany portrays how the Holocaust destroyed the brothers' close childhood bond: his father, a survivor of a Nazi internment camp, denounced Christianity and returned to the Judaism of his birth, while his uncle, who found shelter in an Italian monastic community during the war, be-came a Catholic priest. Even after emigrating to America the brothers remained estranged, each believing the other a traitor to their family's faith. This tragic memoir is a rich, moving family portrait as well as an objective his-torical account of the rupture between Jews and Catholics.
The books can be bought at Amazon.com using Amazon smile to support CAH or at Barnes and Noble or other book sellers.
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FOOD AND COMMUNITY
Many of us have grown up knowing that outside of Yom Kippur (except for break the fast)
food is an integral part of most Jewish ezperiences. If you think back, some of your
fondest memories have food attached to it. Did you ever wonder why? Have you
ever wanted to share some of these memories as well as here those of others?
Come join CAH as we gather together to share, learn and of course, eat.
On Sunday, November 6th at 1:30 p.m.
at the home of Brenda & Arnie Rich
Rabbi JB Sacks will offer a cooking demonstration that will add to your own recipes and
memories.
Please bring a dairy or pareve dish for participants to sample.
We would like to create a recipe booklet so bring the recipe with you and Fran will collect
them and create a booklet after the event. And if you have a favorite quotation or short
story about Jewish Food, community and memories please bring it.
Look forward to seeing you there.
For more information and to RSVP please contact Fran Lande at [email protected]
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Food Share Collection
Food Share – The Good News and the BETTER News
The good news is Food Share came and emptied an entire barrel of
non-perishable food donated by members of CAH. The BETTER news
is that the barrel is again empty, sitting in the lobby, and waiting for
more of your donations! Please take a paper bag and return it full
of non-perishable foodstuffs to help the one in six people of Ventura
County who are food insecure. Let this be your first Mitzvah of the New
Year!
A Community of Caring
We are a family, and sometimes our members need to know there are
people who are concerned about them. If you or someone you know in
the CAH family is ill, bereaved or in need of consolation, condolence or
acknowledgement of a happy event, please contact Brenda Rich so she
can alert our volunteers who will reach out to offer a caring voice or
helping hand.
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Get Well
Bob Packer
Sheila Myles
Fran Lande
Gail Packer
Miriam Rubinstein
Irv Jacobs
Dawn Kennedy
Elaine Hanig
Jerry Davis
Maurice Kozak
Arnie Rich
Lois Lebman
Nancy Stein
Jerry Cordova
ATTENTION ALL JEWISH WAR VETERANS MEMBERS
JWV Post 602
meets in the Veterans Administration Clinic,
Recreation Building 22, 16111 Plummer Street, North Hills, CA.
They meet the 1st Sunday of each month, at 10:00 am and all Jewish Veterans are wel-
come to attend.
Please join us there.
Ann Jacobs
Norma Van Riper
Rachel Kozak
Mort Resnick
Dianne Ruthman
Fred Rosen
Ann Sperber
Herb Stein
Kenny Halpern
Roz Resnick
Lee Rothschild
Barbara Miner
Beth Morales
Betty Abramson
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*Inscribed on Memorial Wall
YAHRZEIT
October 7,
Seyman Korentajer, Father of Cookie Dimant
*Henry Gustafson, Husband of Donna Gustafson
Frieda Hirsch, Aunt of Ruth Resnick
Phillip Hochberg, Father of Mildred Rubenstein
*Edward Seidenberg, Father of Mark Seidenberg
Esther Wolfson, Mother of Ilana Wolfson
October 21,
Eileen Abrams, Mother of Bunny Ames
John Thomas, Father of Donna Gustafson
*Til Hanig Mother-In-Law of Elaine Hanig
* Mitzi Hornick, Mother of Tina Gustavson & Deanna Marenstein
Jack Resnick, Uncle of Mort Resnick
Alfred Kirsch, Uncle of Ruth Resnick
*Hilda Rosen, Mother of Ruth Resnick
Faye Ruthman, Mother- In– Law of Dianne Ruthman
Anne Tepper, Mother of Arline Tepper
Evelyn Schreier, Special Friend of Ilana Wolfson
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October 2016—Elul 5776/Tishrei 5777
Sun Mon Tue Wed Thu Fri Sat
1
Shabbat Ends
7:14 pm
2 3 4 5 6 7 8
Erev Rosh
Hashanah @
6:45pm
Rosh
Hashanah
9:00am
NO Mondays
with Mort
2nd day Rosh
Hashanah
9:0am
6:10p
Candle Lighting
Erev Shabbat
Shuvah
Services 8pm
Shabbat Shuvah
Services
10:00 AM
Shabbat Ends
7:05 pm
9 10 11 12 13 14 15
NO Mondays
with Mort
Erev Yom
Kippur
Kol Nidre 6 p.m.
Happy
Anniversary
Nancy & Herb
Stein
Yom Kippur
9am
6:01p
Candle Lighting
16 17 18 19 20 21 22
Erev Sukkot
6:45 p.m. at
home of Roz &
Mort Resnick
NO Mondays
with Mort
Sukkot Services
10 a.m.
at home of Roz
and Mort Resnick
Anniversary
Renee & Jef
Bratspis
Happy
Birthday
Gil Bratspis
5:52 p
Candle lighting
Sukkot Services
8 p.m. at home of
Roz and Mort
Resnick
Sukkot Services
10 a.m. at home
of Roz and Mort
Resnick
Shabbat Ends
6:48 pm
23 24 25 26 27 28 29
Community
Simchat Torah
Celebration at
TBT 6 p.m.
NO Mondays
with Mort
Shemini Atzeret
Services 10 a.m.
at CAH Yizkor
Service
Happy
Birthday
Ann Sperber
5:45p
Candle lighting
Shabbat Ends
6:41 pm
30 31 NO Mondays
with Mort
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Rabbi J. B. Sacks
[email protected]———phone#323-387-0096
BOARD OF DIRECTORS
PRESIDENT Brenda Rich
phone#-805-469-0268
VICE-PRESIDENT—
TREASURER - Lois Lebman
SECRETARY - Donna Gustafson
CORRESPONDING SECRETARY-Ruth Resnick
WAYS & MEANS VP - Andrea Massion
MEMBERSHIP VP - Miriam Mack
RITUAL VP - Roz Resnick
RITUAL VP Emeritus—Milt Rothschild
HOUSING VP - Neal Abramson
IMMEDIATE PAST PRES - Brenda Rich
ADULT EDUCATION VP - Fran Lande
DIRECTORS—Marc Goldman, , Elaine Hanig,
Janice Aharon-Ezer, Rick Newberger
PAST PRESIDENTS
Mort Resnick
Arnie Fingerhut
Jerry Ruthman z'l
Peter Shack z'l Brenda Rich
OUR VOLUNTEERS
Kiddushim - Brenda Rich
Oneg Shabbat -Fil Barton
Librarian Donna Gustafson
Programming
Tributes Ann Jacobs
Telephone
Purchasing Ruth Resnick
Yahrzeits Bev Rosen
Migdalor Bev Rosen
Sunshine
Webmaster Jef Bratspis
Publicity
