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words words words words words words words wo words words words words words w w w w w Concept and booklet: Linda Espie and Russell Deal Design: Brad Welsh Editing: Karen Masman

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wordswordswords

wordswords

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wordswordswordswords

wordswordswords

wordswordsConcept and booklet: Linda Espie and Russell Deal

Design: Brad WelshEditing: Karen Masman

wordswordswords

wordswordswords

wordswords

wordswords words

wordswordswordswordswords

Words of lifeWords of lightWords to faceThe darkest nightwordsConcept and booklet: Linda Espie and Russell Deal

Design: Brad WelshEditing: Karen Masman

wordswordswords

wordswordswords

wordswords

wordswords words

wordswordswordswords

words

wordswordsConcept and booklet: Linda Espie and Russell DealDevelopment: Linda Espie, Russell Deal, Karen Masman, John HoltonDesign: Brad WelshEditing: Karen MasmanProofreading: Caitlyn LehmannPrint production: Step Forbes

wordswordswords

words

words

wordswordswordswords

Words of lifeWords of lightWords to faceThe darkest nightwordswords

words

wordsConcept and booklet: Linda Espie and Russell DealDevelopment: Linda Espie, Russell Deal, Karen Masman, John HoltonDesign: Brad WelshEditing: Karen MasmanProofreading: Caitlyn LehmannPrint production: Step Forbes

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yearningFirst published in 2007 by:

St Luke’s Innovative Resources137 McCrae Street BENDIGO Victoria 3550 AustraliaPh: 03 5446 0500 Fax: 03 5447 2099Email: [email protected]: www.innovativeresources.orgSt Luke’s Anglicare trading as St Luke’s Innovative Resources ABN: 97 397 067 466

Text: © St Luke’s Innovative Resources and Linda Espie 2007Design: © Brad Welsh 2007

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means (electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise), without the prior written permission of the publisher.

ISBN: 1 920945 20 2

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dedicationWords is dedicated to Steve De Shazer: 25 June, 1940 (Milwaukee, Wisconsin)–11 September, 2005 (Vienna, Austria)

As a pioneer of Brief Therapy, Steve valued simplicity and minimalism as ways of ensuring that clients’ voices are not drowned out by therapists’ cleverness.

‘The fewer the words the better the prayer.’Martin Luther

giftforewordSo often in our everyday life, especially when we are overwhelmed by painful moments or stumped by the magnitude of events, a pervasive sense of isolation is accompanied by the cry, ‘I feel lost for words’. Being mute in this way is never about not feeling anything; nor does it reflect an absence of desire to give expression to our experience. Rather, it is often the case that we feel like there is too much on the inside pushing to be on the outside. Such emotional bottlenecks limit how understood and connected we feel to others in our life and death moments. The resulting isolation constrains our capacity to bring understanding to our experience, heightens our sense of shame, impedes our healing and stops us from grasping new opportunities.

Often in such moments of choked emotion and uncertainty the only words you will hear expressed are, ‘If only I had the words’.

Being without words at times when plain speaking is required evokes frustration and aloneness. These moments can arise in our personal experience when we feel young and unsure or fragile and unsteady. Grasping for words to capture the ‘out of reach’ essence of our experience is known to us all. However, such moments routinely characterise the experience of children and the elderly. Regardless of whether we are young or old, emotionally literate or tongue-tied, in a significant transition or stuck—finding just the right words can be such a source of comfort. Here lies the great gift of this imaginative resource. It has the promise to connect us to our ‘out of reach’ experience and to do so in company.

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Words emerge in response to our lived experience. When they hit the mark our awareness is heightened, our understanding is broadened and our relationships are deepened. Often the result is that we feel more known to ourselves and others, and can let go our tight grip on the things that trouble us. The Gestalt Therapy approach to working with people, the approach that has informed the development of this resource, simply but profoundly reminds us that our natural tendency is to strive for completion. This often involves completing unfinished business, locating our unique experience in a meaningful context and appreciating that we are embedded in relationships. Words assist and are often central to these processes.

I applaud the creativity of this resource. I draw your attention to how intelligently it is embedded in a rich theoretical and practice framework.

I encourage you to lean into your own imagination as you strive to find meaningful, comforting and healing words for yourself and the people with whom you work. The vision of Linda Espie and the team at St Luke’s Innovative Resources has produced a thoughtful, creative and profoundly useful resource. I believe Words has the potential to help us all connect to our personal experience. In so doing, we may also make connections with others around everyday life and death events that can often leave us feeling unhappily lost for words.

Dr Gabriel Phillips Psychologist and psychotherapist Co-Director, Gestalt Therapy Australia

acknowledgementsWe would like to thank all those who have contributed directly or indirectly to Words. A number of people generously gave up their time to participate in focus groups, so thank you to:Jane Sullivan, Coordinator, Family Support Program and Maree O’Toole, Bereavement Services Coordinator, Social Work Department, Royal Children’s Hospital, Parkville, Victoria, AustraliaAnnie Cantwell-Bartl, psychologist in private practice, Victoria, Australia Catherine Cini, Manager and Kathy Wells, Bereavement Support Worker, Griefline, Calvary Health Care Bethlehem, Caulfield, Victoria, AustraliaMeg Moorehouse, loss and grief counsellor in private practice, North Melbourne, Victoria, Australia Marisha Rothman, Coordinator, Loss and

Grief Support Team, Department of Human Services, Disability Accommodation Services, Box Hill, Victoria, Australia

Joan Roberts, Bereavement Coordinator; Glennis Hearn, Assistant Manager; Judy Rassaby, Adolescent Coordinator and Annabel Bakes, Family Support Team, Very Special Kids, Malvern, Victoria, Australia Pat Jewell, author, family and parenting consultant, Melbourne, Australia Tom Anastatasios Stylli, Psychologist, Family Therapist, East Care, Hawthorn, Victoria, AustraliaMichelle Grimshaw, social worker in private practice, Northcote, Victoria, Australia Dr Bruce Rumbold, Director, The Franklin Centre for Social Research in End of Life Care, La Trobe University, Melbourne, Australia Brad Welsh provided excellent design yet again. His elegant, minimalist style allows each card to speak for itself unhampered by distractions. Equally, Brad’s booklet and box designs are both functional and aesthetically pleasing.Karen Masman, Managing Editor, Innovative Resources, was, as always, creative, diligent and thorough. Karen vi

deserves credit for exploring ways that each new product published by Innovative Resources sets new standards for quality.John Holton, writer at Innovative Resources, joined Karen and the booklet authors (Linda Espie and Russell Deal) to form the development team for Symbols. Step Forbes, business manager, supported the project with his excellent print production skills. Caitlyn Lehmann applied her keen eye to the task of proofreading.Everyone on the team at Innovative Resources makes a contribution in some significant way. The free and frank exchange of opinions contributes to the rigour to which any new publication is subjected.Linda would particularly like to thank Gabe Phillips (Co-director, Gestalt Therapy Australia), respected teacher, therapist and mentor of Gestalt, for sharing hours of his time over several conversations about Gestalt Theory and for writing the foreword for this resource; Jeff Hood, Chairperson of

Faculty, Gestalt Therapy Australia, for his continued interest, insight and support over a number of years; her husband, Alan, for his love and support and her children, Brent and Lauren, for keeping her humbly grounded with their reminders that parenting is a central role and that ‘family need’ as well as those we work with. Linda would also like to thank those who worked with her to trial the prototypes for Words and whose experiences have contributed to many of the scenarios included within these pages. Such openness and generosity of spirit is deeply valued. Russell would like to acknowledge everyone who has to cope with his foibles and idiosyncrasies, particularly his ever-patient and generous wife, Anne, who lets him indulge his passions; his creative children, April and Sam; and his grandchildren, Sunny and Sam, who inspire him with their love of language and art.

Linda Espie and Russell DealJuly 2006

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iii Dedication

iv Foreword

vi Acknowledgements

1 Origins of the idea

4 The power of words

5 Thinking about words

9 The list of words

11 Handle with care

12 The blank card

14 The poem

15 Spread and scan

17 Random choice

19 Word play

20 Exploring identity

contents

21 Exploring grief, change and transition

25 Exploring relationships

27 Remembering

28 Exploring spirituality and meaning

30 Mind-mapping

32 Writing and journalling

36 Storytelling

38 Public speaking

39 Using Words with other resources

42 About the authors

43 About St Luke’s Innovative Resources

44 Further reading

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origins of the idea‘I notice that you use plain, simple language, short words and brief sentences. That is the way to write English…stick to it: don’t let fluff and flowers and verbosity creep in. When you catch an adjective, kill it.’ Mark Twain

Over the fifteen years of its life, St Luke’s Innovative Resources has published conversation-building tools using words and pictures together, pictures without words, and words without pictures.The idea to produce a set of cards each containing a single, simple, unadorned word emerged in conversation with Linda Espie. As a published author in the area of grief and bereavement, Linda wanted to develop a set of reflective, therapeutic tools that would expand on the words highlighted within her book entitled A to Z Reflections on Loss and Grief (published by Spectrum in 2003 and available from St Luke’s Innovative

Resources). She approached Innovative Resources (as a

publisher with a long-standing interest in materials that build on the therapeutic power of words and metaphors) with the idea.

The possibility of creating a set of cards, each of which would contain a single evocative word with relevance to issues of life and death, grief, change and transition, was discussed and embraced.

Linda then introduced Russell (Managing Director, Innovative Resources) to Joan Roberts and Glenis Hearn, counsellors with Very Special Kids in Victoria, Australia. Very Special Kids is a unique organisation that supports families throughout their experience of caring for children with life-threatening illnesses, from diagnosis through to recovery or bereavement. (Joan, Glenis and others at Very Special Kids use many of Innovative Resources’ publications and a range of other multi-media tools in their work.)

The group felt that single words without illustrations might well have considerable meaning and power. The

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cards could be placed on or beside other cards, pictures and photographs, or they could be used quite independently.

As we talked about the concept for Words, other ideas for resources to be used in the areas of grief and loss, and palliative care began to take shape. One of those ideas was for an interpretive set of photos that picked up on themes of life and death. Innovative Resources had already commissioned such a card set. It is called Picture This and is due for release in 2007.

Another concept was to create a set of cards that portrayed identifiable symbols. Such symbols could complement both the words and pictures of other card sets, but it was hoped it would work in a significantly different way for some people. This concept evolved into a set of 100 cards known simply as Symbols.

Settling on 100 words and 100 symbols took some time. Initial focus groups led by Linda provided a first draft for each set. As is the way at Innovative

Resources, this list was worked and reworked over many months. The final list that makes up the set of cards for Words does not pretend to be complete or exhaustive but does provide a mixture of words that will, hopefully, have a wide resonance.

Throughout the development of these two sets, the authors and the editorial team at Innovative Resources came to appreciate the beauty and potency of such a minimalist tool. Words—stripped of the camouflage of flowery language, jargon and complex sentences—can be powerful and transformational; single words can work metaphorically at different levels of consciousness.

Once we had engaged Bradley Welsh, one of our talented graphic artists, to create the cards with little adornment save simple, elegant design, we were convinced that Words would find a place in the tool kits of many therapists, counsellors, educators, social workers and trainers. In fact, these cards can be used by anyone who wants to open

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up meaningful conversations with individuals and groups.

Linda has been greatly influenced by her study and practice of Gestalt Therapy and this is reflected in the ideas and the writing for Words and Symbols. The Gestalt approach is built around an interest in awareness, an interest in the impact of experience, and the understanding that all human experience is in relation to everything else. The word ‘Gestalt’ means ‘form, figure or shape’ which sits perfectly with imagery, metaphor and symbol.

Gestalt, as a theoretical framework, acknowledges that there are many influences that impact on our experience of the past, present and future. Drawing on simple and evocative words, as a way to look at and share experiences, can lead to greater awareness as we seek to understand ourselves—including our personal experience, the experience of others and our environment.

As well-known Gestalt therapist Malcolm Parlett says, ‘Everything is interconnected and the meaning derives from the total situation’. This captures key principles of Gestalt Therapy—principles that may illuminate the way you engage with Words. So, in whatever way you tread life’s journey, we trust that somewhere embedded in this set of cards will be a word that builds connection and meaning.

Take a moment to read this booklet of suggestions and then put it aside and let Words work their magic on you and your clients, students, friends and colleagues.

Russell Deal and Linda EspieJuly 2006

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the power of words‘But words are things, and a small drop of ink, falling, like dew, upon a thought, produces that which makes thousands, perhaps millions, think.’ Lord Byron

Arthur Stace is a name that a number of Sydney (Australia) residents would recognise, but it is largely unknown to the world outside that city. However, many people may well have heard, or seen, what Arthur became famous for.

From the 1930s up until his death in 1967, Arthur walked the streets of Sydney writing one word on footpaths in chalk in his flowing copperplate style at least 500,000 times. That single word was ‘Eternity’ and Arthur (or ‘Mr Eternity’ as he became known) was on a personal mission to remind all of Sydney what they faced after death.

Many, perhaps most, would regard Arthur’s mission in life as quaint or quixotic, but did he make thousands, perhaps millions, think? Quite likely.

A single word that jumps out at the reader from a pavement or a page can indeed be life-changing. If this were not so then the advertising industry would not be spending millions of dollars each day in its quest to help businesses construct the perfect badging for their products.

What’s in a name? What’s in a word? Possibly everything.

Single, unadorned, unadulterated words pack a punch. They have a power and a resonance often forgotten by human service professionals who in their professional socialisation are all too often taught that ‘academic’ or ‘professional’ writing has to be flowery. Why only use one word when a hundred will do?

The temptation to dress up our writing and speech to try to sound clever is seductive and ubiquitous. However, single words—freed from jargon, acronyms and gratuitous adjectives—can stand like beacons illuminating

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hidden, perhaps murky, parts of our consciousness.

This booklet of suggestions about the transformational power of single, simple words is certainly dispensable. The reader/user of this resource called Words can simply scan one or more of the cards and draw their own conclusions about their usefulness.

However, some people may find the suggestions in this booklet useful for:

> counselling

> journal writing

> writing poetry or songs

> storytelling

> discussion in a group setting

> individuals reflecting alone

> a range of creative modalities, for example, drawing, painting, and play

> exploring Words together with other creative tools, for example, Symbols, The Bears, Stones…have feelings too! and Koala Company.

‘Words can give everybody wings.’ Aristophanes

thinking about words‘Words are all we have.’ Samuel Beckett

Our relationship with words is unique and personal. Although we communicate through shared definitions and understandings, the way we express ourselves, the way we select, combine and attribute significance to words, is deeply personal.

We are involved in perpetual processes of interpreting, clarifying and defining our words.

Words can be both playful and soulful; we can fritter them away in chatter and ‘small talk’ or we can use them to express our innermost feelings. We

can tell jokes and have words lead us to tears of laughter, other words bring tears of hurt or sadness or regret or…

Words can uplift us to lofty ideals, highest achievements, complex reasoning and inspire the noblest of acts. On the other hand, words can send us plummeting into despair, reduce us to a quivering mess and diminish our very humanity.

Have you ever asked yourself any of these questions?

> Do I have a favourite word?> When I say that word, what

associations come to mind?> How can I use words to create

understanding?> How can words be misinterpreted?> How can words be destructive?> How can I use words to connect

with others?> How can I use words to understand

myself more?> How can I become more aware of the

words I use?

Or have you thought about the place of words in our lives? Here are some themes to ponder:

> Words and their meaning > Words in conversation> Words and associations> Words as description> Words as depiction> Words lost> Words of acknowledgement> Words of exclamation> Words within a story> Words linking> Words delivering a message> Words validating> Words to tell a story> Words to make humour> Words to connect> Words in conflict> Words of sympathy> Words of union> Words for reflection> Words as identification

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> Words as learning> Words to spell> Words within sentences.

The Words set contains 100 cards each featuring a single word. Some are nouns, some are adjectives. Some speak of difficulty and challenge, and some speak of new possibilities and dreams. But they are all everyday words that can be used to open up conversations about meaning, significance, thoughts, feelings and …other words.

At only 100 words this set contains nowhere near enough words to describe the layers, complexity and range of people’s experiences of life, grief, loss and bereavement. But the great thing about words is that one word suggests another word, another sentence, another metaphor. So, we hope that the potent little words that make up this card set may serve as keys to unlock countless stories,

emotions and reflections.

‘Words without thoughts never to heaven go.’ William Shakespeare

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the list of words ‘To get the right word in the right place is a rare achievement.’ Mark Twain

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wordsAloneAngerAnswersBalanceBeautyBeginningsBeliefsBirthBlank cardBodyCalmChanceColdComfortConfusion

CrazyCuriosityDanceDeathDenialDepressionDespairDreamEmptyEnvyEternalFamilyFearFeelingsForgiveFriends

FrustrationFutureGiftGodGriefGrowthGuiltHappyHateHealthHeavenHeavyHellHopeHorrorIdentity

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wordsIntimacyKindnessLaughterLegacyLifeLightLonelyLossLoveMeaningMemoriesNatureNormal NumbOldPainPanicPassion

PatientPeacePossibilitiesPurposeQuestionsRegretReliefRollercoasterSadSafeSearchShockSilenceSingSmellSpiritStrangerStrength

StruggleStuckSupportSurvivalTearsThoughtsTimeTiredTouchTrustUncertaintyUnderstandingWasteWishWonderWoundYearning

Sorry but this page is only available in the hardcopy version of this booklet

handle with care‘It is actually difficult to edit life, especially in regard to feelings.’ Rachel Remen

Innovative Resources’ card sets do not come with rules or instructions—but we are big on suggestions! One of our hallmarks has been to try to publish materials that just about anyone can pick up, enjoy and find useful—without a manual or a training course.

Users of our materials have complete freedom to use the cards in any way to meet their needs—and they do (apart from reproducing them, of course!) We are constantly delighted by the novel and inventive activities that people discover when they let their creativity take hold.

We hope that Innovative Resources’ books, card sets, stickers, posters and picture books enhance the creativity of therapists and never get in the way of anyone’s skills or creative spirit. Most of

all, we hope that anyone using our resources finds them strengths-building and hope-expanding.

Any tool, no matter how well-constructed or well-intentioned, can be used in a ‘power-over’ or oppressive way. So over the years we have developed a rough checklist of reminders for respectful practice. Here are some:

> As a therapist do you enjoy using these materials? Do they work for you?

> Are you fully comfortable and confident in using or recommending them?

> Do you know your client well enough to take the risk of introducing them?

> Is there anything in the materials that may not accord with the culture that the client brings with them? Will they be understood?

> Is the timing right? Will the cards contribute to a useful conversational pathway or will they be a distraction?

> Does the client have a choice? Can they choose the materials they want to work with? Can they choose not to use them without any hint of detriment?11

choicechoice

> Do you have a clear purpose in suggesting the use of a card set? What outcomes do you anticipate?

> Tools have the potential to unlock powerful emotions. Are you ready for the consequences, whatever they might be? Is the setting and timing right to deal with such feelings if they arise? Have you considered issues of confidentiality if the cards are being used in a group setting?

> Do you believe that the client has the literacy or other skills to confidently use the materials without embarrassment or intervention?

> In five years’ time how might the client remember their encounter with you and the cards?

the blank card‘Her absence is like the sky spread over everything.’ CS Lewis

The blank card in the Words set can represent anything and everything you want: a poem, a single word, a favourite line, a meaningful quote, an affirmation, a blessing, a special name, a word that represents a precious memory, perhaps held within, of a time now past.

A blank space can be seen as a silent space—representing the time when all words fade and the only thing left is silence. Perhaps this silence is golden and more eloquent than any word could possibly be. Perhaps this silence is frightening or confronting. Or perhaps you can use this blank card to represent a word that has particular meaning or resonance for you. You may even want to create your own word; a representation of a thought, feeling, a dream, a hope, a memory.

This blank space can be your very own creation. You may want to use

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this blank card to symbolise, signify, imagine, paste, decorate, draw—anything you wish. Start exploring!

You may wish to ask yourself, write about or discuss with others:

> What message might this blank space have for you?

> What word might occupy this empty space?

> What story might this blank card hold?

> If you had one wish what word might represent this wish?

> What would you expand or include in your life given more space?

> Do you have enough space in the world for yourself?

> How much space do you need between others and yourself?

> Are you afraid of silence?> Can you be with uncertainty?

Drawing a blank: telling a story‘This blank card reminds me of how my grief feels like a tearing out of my heart.’ Mifumi

‘When I learned that I had breast cancer, I felt an absolute disconnection between my body and my emotions. This blank card reminds me of the initial shock.’ Alice

‘I chose this blank card which symbolizes the emptiness I still feel as a result of my partner leaving.’ Andy

‘In holding this blank card I am reminded how important it is to have space for myself to do fun and relaxing things, given my heavy workload.’ Sally

‘If this blank card was worth a wish I would wish for peace in our world.’ Hamish

‘The word I would use within this space to describe how I am feeling right now would be “ecstatic”.’ Natalie

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blank

Grief, loss, change and transition, in all of their intensity and passion, sometimes leave people bereft of words to describe the complexity of their feelings. Some of the words in these cards may resonate powerfully for some users. However, selecting the blank card is an invitation to describe your own feelings, as the above quotes from people using the prototypes of Words illustrate. Reflecting on what might appear on the blank card can open up possibilities for colour, shape and texture to be added to complement the ‘missing’ word.

the poemWords of lifeWords of lightWords to faceThe darkest night Russell Deal

This delightful little poem sits beneath the title for Words. The simplicity and gentle whimsy of the poem may act as a prompt for readers to reflect on

life, light, and the huge challenge it can be, at times, to face the darkest night.

At times, a word may give us an opportunity for reflection; an opportunity to stay in the present moment—calm, at peace. At other times, the order of the day requires us to find the momentum to gather energy, motivation, commitment, confidence and hope. We all need a sense that no matter what, we can access the courage we need to face the dark nights that may come with the experience of grief, loss and change.

The following questions are an invitation for you to ponder, wonder, explore, play with and examine the layers of richness contained within the few simple words of this poem:

> Select Words cards that carry a sense of light or lightness.

> Do you currently have this sense of light or is it longed for?

> How might you find light in your life? How might you hold it?

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spread> Select cards that represent the

courage you may need to face the darkest night.

> Do you currently have this courage or is it longed for?

> How might you find more of this courage in your life? How might you hold it?

> Can you use the cards you have selected as prompts to write your own simple poem?

‘There is a great power in words, if you don’t hitch too many of them together.’ Josh Billings

spread and scan‘Stories allow us to see something familiar through new eyes’. Rachel Remen

Probably the most common way that Innovative Resources’ card sets are used is to spread them out, briefly scan

the array, and then make choices according to pertinent questions.

A great advantage of using cards as therapeutic, conversation-building tools is that you do not need to use the entire set. A valuable conversation can be built around a partial set or even just a few cards. These can be sorted according to themes, priorities or goals. They can be stacked, flipped through, turned face up or down, dealt or even randomly selected.

There are 100 cards in the Words set—a lot to scan at once! So, for some people, it may be preferable to reduce the pack. At times, the facilitator may want to include only those cards that seem directly relevant to the person or group concerned.

While spreading the cards on the tabletop may be the most comfortable way to view them, you might also consider working on the floor. Walking around the cards and scanning from a greater height can provide a different perspective and adds an extra degree of physicality. Even placing a group of cards on the floor in the room

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spreadcan encourage movement. This is particularly effective for people with kinesthetic learning preferences (those who learn best by using the hands or moving the body).

Another option is to mount the cards on a board to save space and capitalise on the way in which the individual cards can combine to create a single work of art, possibly with layered meaning for some participants. Sometimes when all the cards are presented in this way they can combine to create a symbol of the multi-faceted nature of our experience.

Spreading and scanning can work with an individual but is also ideally suited for working with groups where the activity can act as an icebreaker; a means of breaking up ‘the talk’ or as an evaluation exercise.

Once scanned, an array of activities can be developed. While many of these are discussed in subsequent sections some of the most commonly used questions are:

> Which cards resonate with you the most?

> Which cards best describe how the past year (or week or month) has gone for you?

> Which cards say something about one of your pet likes or dislikes?

> Which card is what you feel inside and which card is what others see?

> Which card/s represents a challenge for you?

> Does any card repel you? Can you say why?

> Can you sort the cards into three bundles such as:

– those you are most comfortable with?

– those you are least comfortable with?

– those you are unsure of?

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Words cards can also provide a means of closure and evaluation for a group.

> Which Words cards sum up what you have got out of this group?

> Which Words cards could you use to remind you of what you have learned?

Opening to possibilities by exploring regret Stephen, a 35-year-old single person, came to see a counsellor feeling ready now to look at his life. In the first session he spread and scanned Words and selected three cards: ‘death’, ‘cold’ and the ‘blank’ card which he named ‘broken’. When invited to explore the resonance of these words, Stephen talked about how many people fear death and that he imagined death as cold. He was curious about why he chose ‘broken’ and wondered if unconsciously he was, in fact, broken. He then picked up the word ‘regret’. When asked to talk about any regret

in his life he said, ‘I need to stop living with regret; I need to just live life.’ He described

feeling regret about not acting on some things, about not being more assertive, not experimenting with more things, not studying more at school and not accepting his sexuality earlier. Towards the end of the session Stephen expressed regret at, ‘the number of times I didn’t listen to my instincts and how I would act against them.’

The clarity gained by naming the regrets in this way opened up possibilities to explore different actions for the future.

random choice‘Chance is always powerful. Let your hook be always cast; in the pool where you least expect it, there will be a fish.’ Ovid

An alternative to spreading and scanning is random choice. This method works like many traditional card games. Cards are shuffled and placed face down on the table, and are selected randomly by the person. Or a ‘hand’ of cards can be dealt to each person.17

Whether the activity is designed for an individual or a group, it is the reaction to the serendipitous ‘arrival’ of a card that is important. The following questions may be useful:> What does this word mean to you? > What other words come to mind?> What other pictures come to mind

when you see this word?> Do any particular memories

come to mind?> Would this word have significance

at different times?> Are there certain people you

associate with this card?

A small group allows for individuals to compare and contrast their different interpretations of a word. > Does the word have different

meanings for different group members?

> How do members react emotionally to each word?

> What does this reveal about the similarities and differences between group members?

Words out of the boxJames randomly pulled five cards out of the Words tin and discussed his associations with three of them. He commented that ‘confusion’ has had a life-long place with him. He said he felt that it was less worrying today, as he has come to accept it as a part of his experience in the world. Reflecting on the word ‘tears’, James spoke of never being good at crying. Messages from his mother to be strong; that crying is for girls and not boys, have led him to keep all his emotions hidden. He named a feeling of sadness (using the card ‘sad’) at the thought of his inability to cry. The final word discussed, ‘frustration’, fits with James’s immediate experience of being out of work. His experience of no work means a lack of money and power to him, as well as feeling a lack of self-esteem and a sense of failure.These reflections and frank sharings from James served as starting points for conversations about possibilities and ways forward.

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word playApart from communicating thoughts, feelings, experiences and stories, the Words card set can be used in many other creative and enjoyable ways: in play, in jest, in games, in passing, and in a contest! Whether on you own, in a group, in pairs, or with children and friends, try one or more of the following prompts and see where ‘word play’ takes you: > Select a word to focus on for the

day. Reflect, explore, discuss, write a poem, a story or journal with this word. You may choose to select a new word tomorrow.

> Share a word in someone’s ear—build on the word and offer a compliment, a message, some gentle advice.

> Think of a time when words have failed you. Find a word that may have unblocked you in that situation.

> Offer a word to ‘give rise to the wise’—a word of wisdom.

> Choose a word and share a funny story.

> Select three words and whisper them around the group. Do the same three words reach the end and come back to you?

> Select a word or a number of words and tell a scary story.

> Gather up a handful or two of words and place them in a glass bowl. Pass the bowl around and guess the number of words within.

> Select a word out of a box and mime or act out the word as in the game charades.

‘If you have a morbid fear of peanut butter sticking to the roof of your mouth, there is a word for it—arachibutyrophobia’. Bill Bryson

play

exploring identity‘Fill your paper with the breathings of your heart.’ William Wordsworth

At times, many of us struggle to find the words to describe our thoughts and feelings. And yet, our capacity to do so—to find just the ‘right’ metaphor or words to name and communicate our feelings—greatly impacts on our ability to connect with others and build meaningful relationships. And, of course, finding the right words to name our feelings and experiences is a vital part of our own internal processes of identity-building.A potent mix of cultural and personal meanings gathers around almost every, if not all, words. As soon as we begin to learn a foreign language we see that different languages construct the world differently, and it can certainly be argued that through our primary language we are predisposed to see the world in a certain way. Words are part of our reality, our assumptions and our identity.

Words are vital in helping us to understand ourselves and others. We can miss opportunities for self-discovery and connection when we lack ways of describing the experiences that shape us. Because the words that make up the Words card set are highly interpretive, they can lead to some powerful and unexpected insights into our identity and the meaning we give our experiences.

Questions such as those below can be used in counselling and groupwork but are also available for us to use in our personal reflection and self-exploration:

> Which Words cards would I use to describe myself to someone who doesn’t know me?

> Which words are fundamental to who I am right now as a person?

> Which words reflect parts of myself I could readily give up?

> Which words represent the person I would most like to be?

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> Which words would my partner, parents, children or colleagues say were me?

> Do any of the cards reflect my shadow side—the parts of me I would rather not have?

> Do any of the words scare me, challenge me or repulse me?

> Are there parts of me that no one sees or that I don’t want others to see? Which words speak to these parts?

Who am I now?A group of people selected Words cards to reflect on their feelings and sense of identity. Here are some of the things they said:‘I felt totally alone when Anthony died.’‘I remember thinking I was going crazy when he left me.’

‘I need love and support now more than ever, as I embark on this course of study.’ ‘I could not stand the anger that was directed at me.’‘I am on such a rollercoaster ride of emotions.’ ‘Who are my friends now? Everyone seems like a stranger to me.’‘I just don’t know what normal is anymore.’‘The support I have received from the community has been incredible. But I just feel numb.’

‘Words are but pictures of our thoughts.’ John Dryden

exploring grief, change and transition‘In three words I can sum up everything I’ve learned about life: It goes on.’ Robert Frost

Grief is an intimate personal experience. While there are many similarities in

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the ways individuals use language and draw on symbolic and metaphoric representations to describe how grief impacts, no two people can share the experience. We may have a deeply felt connection or resonances as we listen to others tell their story. We may also have an understanding and appreciation of their personal journey, but we can never really know how it is for another.

Any experience of grief will involve some form of change and transition, regardless the situation. Grief may occur after any perceived experience of loss. Some examples of situations that may evoke a grief response include relationship breakdown, illness, death, divorce, retrenchment, moving home, changing jobs, death of a pet, relationship conflict, loss of personal items, robbery, ageing, migration, incarceration, homelessness, disability, isolation, loss of esteem/confidence, drug/alcohol misuse, and loss of peer group/community and many more.

Here are some questions that can be used to explore the experience of grief and loss:

> How would you begin to describe your initial experience of grief?

> How has your grief challenged you?> How has your grief changed you?> Has your experience of grief

impacted on your relationships with family, friends, and work colleagues? If so, how?

> How would you describe your grief here and now?

> Where is your grief located in your body?

> Has your health changed as a result of your grief?

> How are you different now than before this experience of grief?

> Is grief, death and dying still a taboo in our society? If so, how is this expressed?

> In general, how does society respond to people who are grieving?

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> What has helped you most in your experience of grief?

> What has been least helpful in your experience of grief?

> What have you learned about yourself as a result of your grief?

> What have you come to appreciate about others in your life as a result of your grief?

> Does grief contribute to a person’s resilience? If so, how?

Think about a loss you have experienced and the impact of your grief. Find a Words card that resonates with some part of your thoughts, feelings, and responses as you consider the following questions:> What was your initial experience of

grief?> What is your current experience of

this grief?> What have you learned about

yourself?> How might your learning be helpful

in the future?

Finding words to describe the griefA counsellor working with Stephen (whose wife had died) used Words as a tool to open up the conversation and learn more about him. This is how the conversation began:

Counsellor: ‘Choose a word or a number of words to help me learn more about you and your experience of grief. Tell me about your grief: What does it feel like? What does it look like? What words would you use to describe it?’

Stephen chose ‘heavy’, ‘frustration’ and ‘rollercoaster’.

Counsellor: ‘Tell me about your grief —the heavy, the frustration and the rollercoaster.

Stephen: ‘I have this heavy feeling that just sits on my chest. It feels like it’s hard to breathe sometimes. And I feel frustrated because I’ve always had good health, been fit and energetic.’

Counsellor: ‘What do you notice is happening before you have this feeling of heaviness?’

Stephen: ‘Well, I guess since Anna died it’s been one thing after another and it’s been so up and down—when I saw the word rollercoaster I thought that’s exactly what it’s like.’

Counsellor: ‘So, the notion of rollercoaster resonated with you?’

Stephen: ‘Yes, you bet. That’s just what it feels like.’

Counsellor: ‘So, is there a relationship between the heaviness, the finding it hard to breathe sometimes, and the rollercoaster?’

Stephen: ‘Well yes, that is how it is now. When everything is so out of my control, like my health now seems to be, I think maybe I am going to die suddenly just like she did.’

Counsellor: ‘Are there any other words that resonate with your feeling of being out of control, concerns for your health, and wondering if you too might die?’

Stephen: ‘Fear.’

This exchange between Stephen and his counsellor illustrates how Words

enriched Stephen’s capacity to describe his experience. It highlights the power of metaphoric representation in helping us to understand and articulate our deepest experiences.

In search of hopeSam began frantically searching among the Words cards for a particular one that could express her current experience. In tears, she talked with her counsellor about looking for the word ‘hope’.

Her counsellor suggested she say out loud, ‘I’m looking for hope.’ Sam repeated this sentence several times with strong emotion. When asked to notice her body sensations, Sam talked about feeling panic at not being able to find the word ‘hope’. She reflected on her desperate search for hope; hoping for some positive outcomes relating to her current situation.

Many fruitful insights emerged as the reflection and conversation about Sam’s experience of hope continued to unfold.

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exploring relationships‘Words of love are works of love.’ William Alger

Activities such as scanning, sorting, grouping and selecting cards from the Words set give users opportunities to ponder and discuss many aspects of their lives, including relationships. Working with key words and metaphors in this way can bring perceptions of a relationship or person to the fore in a new or surprising way. Such conversations can be challenging and confronting; they can be hilarious and heart-warming; or they can be filled with sweet memories and longing—but they can also allow a bigger story to emerge. Words can clarify and help a person accept what is, or was…or what may never be.

Choose a relationship you would like to explore: spouse, partner, parent, sibling, child, grandparent, extended family member, housemate, colleague, supervisor, etc. Choose cards in response to the following questions:

> Which words describe the way you feel about this relationship?

> Which words do you imagine the other person would choose to describe you and your relationship?

> Which words might sum up how the relationship has evolved or changed?

> Which cards might describe something that may be absent from the relationship?

> Which cards represent qualities you would like to see more of in the relationship?

> What qualities do you value most in any relationship?explore

The presence of both anger and forgivenessEven though it had been 10 years since her sister’s death, Alison still felt overwhelmed by anger. At times, it was Susan who was the older, more brainy one. She knew her parents had had a different relationship with Susan. A special love.

But it was Susan who had killed herself. It was Susan who left her younger sister to deal with their parents’ sorrow in the months following her suicide, and then it was Alison’s sole responsibility to support their aging parents with their encroaching frailty.

Yes, she did feel resentment but more than that, she felt anger—and that was the card that always jumped out from the pack. But Alison always separated out two cards, not one. The other card said ‘forgiveness’. Forgiveness was no antidote to anger. It would not wipe out those desolate bursts, but Alison always chose the ‘forgiveness’ card knowing that this was her life’s test: to forgive Sue and to forgive herself.

Relationship-building in a disability residential centreTo help build communication between people living in a disability residential setting, the facilitator selected 15 Words cards representing feelings. Each person was invited to choose one card they could use to talk about what they were currently thinking and feeling about living together.

> Max: ‘I’m happy when we go out for drives to the beach.’

> Trent: ‘I love everybody in the house and the dog and the staff and everyone.’

> Andrew: ‘I feel really sad when I am crying.’

> Franco: ‘Andrew makes me really angry when he has the TV up loud.’

‘Words have no life of their own. It is people who have life and it is they who give life words.’ David Crystal

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remembering‘Remembering may be painful and comforting, sometimes in the same moment or hour.’ Linda Espie

A key function of useful therapeutic materials is that they can help us to access memories, almost forgotten dreams, goals and experiences. Often a single word can serve as a potent reminder of events and stories of great significance.

Scan the Words set and consider the following questions:

> Do particular words remind you of significant experiences?

> Which words come to mind when you think of a life-changing event you have experienced (leaving home, the birth of a child, a near-death experience, an outstanding success)?

> Which words lead to particular recollections?

> What does the word ‘yearning’ remind you of?

> What comes to mind with the word ‘laughter’?

> If you choose ‘intimacy’ can you remember the people with whom you could claim true intimacy?

> ‘Family’ might evoke rich, complex, even contradictory memories. Can you choose a card that might summarise such complex memories?

> The word ‘hope’ has a deep resonance. Who in your past best encapsulated a hopeful life?

> Have you looked at your collection of personal and family photos lately? As you look at each snapshot of your life what words are suggested to you?

> Malcolm Gladwell talks about ‘tipping points’ as those small, seemingly insignificant events, that have huge repercussions. What have been the ‘tipping points’ in your life?

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> What words would you have associated with a particular tipping point at the time?

> What words come to mind now as you look back on that tipping point?

Another way of remembering is called ‘frozen moments’. These are the choices we have made, possibly insignificant at the time, that have changed the direction of our lives. For example, taking one job and not another, deciding not to get on a plane, forgetting to buckle a seatbelt, deciding not to retaliate with a punch. A frozen moment might have consumed a nanosecond of real time but its implications may have reshaped our lives and we might replay that instant over and over in our minds.

> Can you remember such a ‘frozen moment’?

> What single words sum up your feelings and thoughts about it?

exploring spirituality and meaning‘What am I living for? What should I find pleasure in? What will happen to me in the future?’ Tomihiro Hoshino

Spirituality is, for many, a difficult area to define and describe. Much attention is given to physical, emotional, social, cognitive and psychological approaches to further our understanding of ourselves and our place in the world. Yet voyaging into our spiritual realm, as a deeply personal and intimate expression, is oftentimes uncharted territory—avoided, overlooked. Concepts and phrases including ‘personal journey’, ‘search for meaning’, ‘mystery’, ‘possibility’, ‘higher power’, ‘ritual’, ‘belief’ and ‘religion’ are generally more openly acknowledged and discussed. Some attempts to describe spirituality include notions of multidimensional yet intangible aspects in nature, our internal world, deeper forces and forces beyond.

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remember

meaning

Words can be used to explore spirituality and meaning in one’s life—past, present or future. The cards may provide a ‘way in’, an ‘opening’ or ‘beginning platform’ for exploring thoughts, feelings and reflections that are spiritual in nature. Regardless of individual levels of familiarity, curiosity, comfort, confusion or discomfort, the following questions may provide a platform to broaden spiritual reflection and connection, either alone or in conversation with others.

> Which Words card or cards help you define or describe your understanding of spirituality?

> Can you find a card or a set of cards which represent meaning in your life?

> Is there a card which represents mystery?

> Is there a card that depicts personal transition?

> Are there any cards which describe spiritual dimensions that are within your life currently or which you are seeking?

> Are there any cards you could draw on to broaden spiritual possibilities?

> Which Words cards might deepen your connection within a spiritual realm?

> Which Words cards seem contrary to your beliefs or understandings of spirituality?

> Do any of the cards hold a religious resonance for you?

> Is there a card that might fulfill a spiritual role or function for those grieving?

> Is there a card that might fulfill a spiritual role or function for those living with a chronic or life-threatening illness?

> Is there a relationship between spirituality and faith, religion and prayer?

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meaning

> Are there any cards that might offer you a greater sense of purpose or direction in your life?

> Is there a card that might strengthen your spirit?

> Which Words cards signify how you connect with your spiritual self?

> Which Words cards might support you to deepen your spiritual enquiry?

> Is there a card that might help you to find greater meaning in your life?

> Which Words cards seem to you to be connected to particular rituals or to signify certain cultural practices?

> How might you create a ritual using Words cards to represent a current personal experience or an experience within your community?

‘Nothing is more spiritual than words.’ Walt Whitman

mind-mapping‘The map is not the territory.’ Malcolm Parlett

Creating a picture or map of the connections between cards is an activity that can be developed either through scanning or random choice. Cards are physically placed in an arrangement according to how they are associated. Cards that connect closely are grouped closely. Cards with little connection are spread further apart.

Select a card that speaks to you in some significant way. Then choose other cards that seem connected.

> Can you say how the cards connect?> Can you arrange them to reflect this

connection?> Is there a sequence of connections?> Is this like a story?> What is the theme of this

connection?> Does the map have a centre or

a pivotal point? Is one card the central figure?

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> Does the map say anything about what is important to you at present?

> Does the pivotal point sometimes change? What happens if you select another card as the pivotal point?

A variation on this theme is to draw a meandering pathway on a sheet of paper. Cards can then be arranged along the pathway to represent stages or points of significance on an unfolding journey such as grief.

Mind-mapping activities build upon our powers of association. We construct meaning around a word or a metaphor through association with other words and metaphors. Therefore, visual and physical activities such as this can provide valuable new insights into the meanings we give our experiences.

The fullness of ‘empty’Mario focused solely on the word ‘empty’ and proceeded to expand on it with mind-mapping. He wrote down the following words in association: vastness, secluded, alone, no connection, searching, lack of love, empty within, dread, hollow, darkness, blackness, soulless, half full, half empty. When asked to combine and reduce those associated words to an ‘essence’ statement he looked at them for a minute and said, ‘Empty is the hollow vastness of being alone.’

When asked about the colour, texture, sound, smell and taste of ‘empty’ he described it as ‘black, sometimes colourless, the texture is cold and slimy, the sound is an echo, distant, like dropping a nail into a deep metal bucket, the smell is musty, like mildew and the taste is banal—tasteless.’

‘I felt someone was looking at me I turned my wheel-chair A small flower was blooming there.’ Tomihiro Hoshino

writing and journalling‘One of the obligations of the writer is to say or sing all that he or she can, to deal with as much of the world as becomes possible to him or her in language.’ Denise Leverton

Who imposed the rules on writing that most of us have absorbed? Many of the conventions we have are useful, even necessary, but writing can come in many shapes and sizes. For the human service worker or the person on a voyage of self-discovery, who is to say what is best or of most value?

Words can be used to ignite and inspire ideas for a range of creative writing activities including stories, prose, poetry and song. These cards can provide prompts and suggestions for story lines, whether used by themselves or in conjunction with other tools.

Choose a card that interests you or select one at random. > What does the word mean to you? > What does it remind you of?

> Can you write a poem about that word?

> Who might you address the poem to?

> Which Words cards suggest a story you would like to write?

> What is its key message? > How long would it need to be?> Who could you imagine reading it?

Journal writing, using a variety of techniques, is also a very fertile activity for many people wanting to record and explore their life events, emotions and goals. Journalling helps many people to navigate their experiences, experiment safely with imagined replies to people (in the form of unsent letters) and explore their own reactions and thought processes. (For those particularly interested in journalling as a therapeutic practice please see Inside Out: a journalling kit published by Innovative Resources, or contact us for information about our journalling and creative writing workshops.)

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Lists as a journal writing techniqueProbably the simplest journalling technique is the list. Lists are an almost universal activity—such as the ubiquitous shopping list. In fact, many card packs from Innovative Resources begin their development as lists. Words, for example, began its life as a list of 120 possible word ideas.

Lists are a great means of playing with words and ideas. They are a way of capturing lots of information very easily and quickly, especially if we unleash the censor and allow ourselves to list anything that comes to mind under a given topic. Often the initial words in a list come easily, but after about 30 or so the mind needs to delve deeper and things may get even more interesting! Try lists of 50 or 100 and apply some simple percentages. For example, in a list of 100 things that delight you, what percentage of the time is an aspect of nature mentioned?

Later, lists can be edited, shaped, ordered and prioritised, if desired. The process of listing can be therapeutic in itself but the end product—‘The List’—can provide the starting point for lots of creative writing.

Pick 10 Words cards that interest you and list the words.

> Can you include all of these words in a single sentence?

> Can you write a poem that includes all these word?

> Can you choose one word and write an acrostic poem with each letter of the word beginning a line of the poem?

> Can you create a story from this list of words?

> Can you find a Words card that represents a recent event in your life?

> What can you say about the event and the card?

> Can you choose seven cards and use one word as a theme for your journal writing each day?

Writing about our experiences and stories can take many forms. Sometimes there are no suggested steps or sequences to follow. At other times it may be fruitful to write using a structure for dealing with perceptions and issues in a particular way.

Critical reflectionCritical reflection provides a more systematic framework for deconstructing an incident with the intent of developing insight and understanding. (See Mezirow J 1991, Fostering critical reflection in adulthood: a guide to transformative and emancipatory learning, Jossey-Bass, San Francisco.)

Critical reflection is a process whereby a person challenges and confronts his or her own thinking by asking probing questions such as:

> Why do I think this?

> Are there inconsistencies in my thinking?

> What are my underlying assumptions?

> What story am I telling myself about this?

> Whose knowledge and experience has been included or excluded?

> How might I do things differently?

Perhaps somewhere between the looseness of journal writing and the rigour of critical reflection is a range of writing that can include traditional case studies and the more recent emergence of autobiographical writing as a teaching tool.

Interviews and short storiesSometimes people’s stories and perceptions are captured via interviews and presented with very little editing or authorial intervention. The ‘voice’ of the person being interviewed is authentically preserved. For example, David Ritchie’s and Allan Kellehear’s book Seven Dying Australians (published by Innovative Resources) presents interviews with seven

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35createpeople from different walks of life and circumstances, all speaking about their experiences of facing death.

Also published by Innovative Resources is Jennifer Lehmann’s book, The Harveys and Other Stories where fictional stories are presented almost as case studies for critical reflection about social work practice. Both of these books are examples of writing that can be used for reflective practice and learning.

Short stories can take many different forms, from as small as a single sentence to a few thousand words. Picture books and poems are other forms of writing that are rich in symbols and metaphors.

Whatever the writing style, the Words cards can be used as prompts for a central idea or theme that may be full of meaning and significance for the writer and reader.

> Before you begin to write can you pick the Words card (or cards) that sums up the key message you wish to convey on paper?

> If you are having trouble getting started, is there a Words card that has rich associations for you? Place this card in front of you, list all the associations that come to mind, and see if this acts as a ‘springboard’ for getting the pen to flow.

> Which Words cards suggest a story you would like to write?

> Who could you imagine reading it?

> How long would it need to be?

> What is its key message?

> Imagine you are being interviewed by someone. Imagine an interesting question they might ask you. Begin your writing by answering that question.

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createCreative writing inspired by the word ‘grief’My grief at unexpected times washes over me—full force, head to toe and back up again. I am flushed—overcome. Other times it presents me with a jab in my heart which takes my breath away—leading me to feel like I will collapse, maybe even die.

It seems to master my whole being. Invading, possessive, with great candour, much vigour—demandingly.

My grief is attention-seeking and thus I have little choice but to attend to it; let it be. Let it be in any one of its manifestations and at any one moment in time.

Such is my grief.

Maree

‘Writing in a journal is a way of giving yourself inner space.’ Mark Pearson

storytelling‘All human beings have an innate need to hear and tell stories and to have a story to live by.’ Harvey Cox

A parent telling stories to children at bedtime…A teacher bringing a lesson to life…A story told at the beginning of a meeting…An anecdote told at a significant family gathering…Storytelling is undoubtedly a vital tool of communication.

Isn’t it true that we thrive on stories; that the stories we accumulate in our memories define our identity? Before writing was invented oral storytelling was the predominant means of communicating culture, and even now in our multi-media, high technology world storytelling retains its charm and poignancy.

The art of the storyteller—the bard, the poet, the balladeer, the comedian—is profound. A true wordsmith can build images and different realities by crafting words upon which to thread experiences. To be entertained by a skilled storyteller is an exquisite joy. However, the art of storytelling need not, and should not, be relegated only to the professional or the experienced.

The Words cards can be used to encourage storytelling. A single word might provide the starting prompt for a story or a string of words might suggest a plot or a theme.

Choose a card at random or by scanning.

> What stories do you associate with that word?

> Try telling a story using the card(s) you have selected.

> Deal out the cards and invite each group member to tell a story using all of their cards.

> Thinking of a person who is dear to you (it may be someone who has died) can you use the Words cards to tell a story about that person?

> What Words cards would you choose to represent their strengths?

> Can you use the Words cards to tell a story about something you learnt from this person?

A great tool for conversation-building and storytelling in groups is BWF: Best, Worst, Funniest.

> Can you think of the best, worst and funniest things that have happened to you today (or this week, this month, etc)?

> Scan the Words cards and see if you can find one that might represent each of these three events. Tell your stories to the others in your group.

‘Everybody has their own linguistic story to tell, and each story is worth telling.’ David Crystal

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public speaking‘Words are the thread on which we string our experiences.’ Aldous Huxley

One of the most common anxieties for many people is speaking in public. Whether it is a large group, a group of strangers or an event that is emotionally charged, the stress of speaking can be magnified—even for accomplished speakers.

Some people resort to reading notes, others use flash cards, while the technologies of overhead slides or ‘PowerPoint’ can provide structure and visual reinforcement.

However, many of the Innovative Resources’ card sets can work as prompts to help keep the words flowing when otherwise the anxiety might overwhelm.

Words cards can work as reminders for what you want to say. They can be held up or converted to overheads or slides to reinforce your points to the audience.

Finding public wordsCheryl had never been asked to speak at a funeral service before. It was her father’s funeral and as his only living child she felt it was her duty to provide a eulogy. While mainly family and friends would be there, she felt frozen in her fear that she would breakdown, not be able to finish, and look weak and foolish.

Cheryl had done plenty of public speaking in less poignant situations and she had the foresight to write out her ‘speech’ so that a close friend could read it if she herself faltered. She chose six Words cards that described her feelings for her father. As she talked about her father’s life and the impact on her, she held up each card in turn for the congregation to see. She found that the cards worked as reminders and reassurance for her and spoke for 10 minutes with barely any hesitation.

At the end she asked the congregation if they too had any words that would

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resources

describe her father. Quite a few people volunteered their words and the whole service proved to be moving and memorable.

using words with other resources‘All in all, art represents the need of one human being to communicate with another by whatever means—each as good as another.’ Edvard Munch

Words was developed in conjunction with two other card sets; Symbols and Picture This. These three sets of cards complement each other well and can be used very easily together. For example, all of the cards from each of the three sets can be spread out for scanning and card selection. Participants can be asked to choose one card from each set according to the given question. Alternatively, one set can be scanned and sorted, and then

participants can choose cards from other sets to ‘surround’ or ‘overlay’ a selected card.

The following questions might be useful:> Is there a Words card or a Picture

This card that sums up how you are feeling at present?

> If you put this card in the centre, which of the cards from the Symbols set add meaning to, or help describe, these feelings? These cards can be placed on or touching the Words or Picture This card to create a loose collage.

> If this is how you are feeling now, which cards describe how you would like to be feeling?

> On the right of your original collage can you build a collage of how you would like to be feeling?

> What can you do to move towards your picture of how you would like to be feeling?

> Which cards from Symbols, Words or Picture This might describe the activities that can lead to change?

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resources

St Luke’s Innovative Resources publishes a wide range of card sets and stickers, each of which can be used either on their own or in conjunction with others. Graphic style varies from cartoon characters to edgy photographic montage, to watercolour and oil paintings. This enables you to select the style that is most appropriate for those who will be using the tools.

Some other card sets to consider using with Words are:

a patchwork life:This is a set of 40 cards for having creative conversations about our experiences. The card set is woven around a metaphor—the metaphor of a patchwork quilt. Use to relate experiences, create stories about our personal potential, consider our options and make decisions.

growing well: ways of noticing our mental and emotional wellbeingGrowing Well is built around 50 key statements that are important indicators of mental health and balance. Topics include health, organisation, relationships, connection, etc. Accompanying each statement is a ‘scale’ using simple illustrations of a seed growing into a tree. A user checks the box that is relevant to them and in this way the scale can be used to notice change and describe growth—even when words seem inadequate.

inside out: a journalling kitJournalling is a powerfully creative way to ‘name’ our feelings, and navigate life’s challenges. This is a set of 32 full-colour, gate-folded cards designed to stand upright on a desk. A key word (with an evocative illustration) appears on one side of the card, while the reverse features a quote and a range of simple, yet effective journalling techniques.

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reflexionsThis set of 32 cards or stickers uses street and techno style photography for encouraging adolescents to explore their lives. What do I think? What do I feel? What is important to me? Where am I heading? Each card features a key word and a layer of images to illustrate it. By encouraging conversations about the good stuff and the hard stuff, this is a powerful tool for building identity, self-esteem and goals.

shadows and deeper shadowsShadows uses evocative and interpretive watercolours to depict situations of struggle, sadness or ambiguity. These emotionally-charged representations often bring latent feelings to the surface. It can be helpful to overlay words on top of the pictures to help express the feelings that surface. This set is also a great resource

for teachers of creative writing and workshop facilitators.

signposts: exploring everyday spiritualityEach of the 48 cards in this set features a photograph and a short phrase such as ‘valuing simplicity’, ‘sharing the load’, ‘lasting the distance’, ‘walking through shadow’ and ‘dancing with joy’. These phrases can be used by people to describe their life journeys and purpose. Signposts alludes to the ‘big questions’ in life and again carries an emotional poignancy for many.

symbolsSymbols have a profound ability to quickly convey a range of meanings. They speak to us at a deep level and can encapsulate broad vistas of human experience. Symbols is a set of 100 cards, each containing a hand-drawn symbol such as candle, a key and a boat. This range of simple yet powerful symbols can help us reflect on and discuss our feelings and experiences.

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about the authorsLinda EspieLinda is a loss and grief counsellor, educator, supervisor and consultant in Melbourne, Australia. She has worked in the field of loss and grief for 24 years. Her counselling and lecturing areas include: death, dying and illness, traumatic death, suicide bereavement, pregnancy loss, child and adolescent grief, road trauma, disability, separation and divorce, and compassion fatigue.

Linda was a foundation member of the stillbirth and neonatal death support organisation (SANDS Victoria), and was one of two consultants who established the Centre for Grief Education in Melbourne. Since 2001, Linda has provided lectures and workshops in Japan and travels to Japan twice a year.

Linda is the author of three books:It’s just different now, Spectrum Publications, Australia, 1999A to Z reflections on loss and grief, Spectrum Publications, Australia, 2003

Let the children be our teachers: a guide for Japanese health and welfare professionals, Medical Publishing, Seikaisha Co Ltd., Tokyo, 2005

Russell DealAt the tender age of 17 and knowing nothing about social work, Russell decided that this was the profession for him. At age 40, during one of his numerous mid-life crises, he decided he wanted to become a publisher. Now at age (indeterminate) he claims to know little about either profession but has been fortunate to have been able to work alongside many super-talented colleagues.

Russell is the managing director of St Luke’s Innovative Resources, a position that gives him permission to drink copious cups of coffee with graphic artists and other disreputable types. Russell has contributed to many of Innovative Resources’ publications and runs his seriously daggy Travelling Toolshed workshops whenever anyone can coax him out of his secluded valley near Castlemaine in Victoria, Australia.

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about st luke’s innovative resourcesInnovative Resources:> publishers of metaphors> commissioners of transformational art> manufacturers of therapeutic tools> designers of conversational prompts.

In our pretentious moments we can describe ourselves in any number of high falutin’ ways, but lest anyone thinks we have ‘tickets on ourselves’ we are really just a bunch of book lovers with an array of different backgrounds cobbled together by St Luke’s Anglicare to create their publishing arm.

Over almost 15 years we have had a lot of fun and learned a little about publishing along the way. We have managed to stay one step outside debtors’ prison and we have been able to accumulate a loyal bunch of graphic artists and other disreputable souls.

More importantly, we have been privileged to have been able to take original ideas from St Luke’s

own 25 years of social work practice as well as many other sources and turn them into hands-on materials that have been life-changing for many people.

Innovative Resources commenced without a business plan or a budget. We now have a team numbering over 20. We sell worldwide with the assistance of over 70 retailers. We work with some 15 super-talented freelance graphic artists and we are committed to supporting our local printing industry.

Any profit we make is used to develop further resources or returned to St Luke’s Anglicare for investing in programs to support the lives of children, young people, families and communities.

To find out more about Innovative Resources and St Luke’s visit our user-friendly website

www.innovativeresources.org

43further

further reading Bertman, S (ed) 1999, Grief and the healing arts: creativity as therapy, Baywood Publishing, New York

Bryson, B 1990, Mother tongue: the English language, Penguin, London

Crystal, D 2006, Words, words, words, Oxford University Press, London

Hicks, W 2004, Quite literally: problem words and how to use them, Routledge, London

Mackewn, J 2004, Developing gestalt counselling, Sage Publications, London

Marris, P 1996, The politics of uncertainty: attachment in public and private life, Routledge, London

Moore, T 2002, The original self: living with paradox and originality, Harper Collins, New York

Moore, T 2004, Dark nights of the soul: a guide to finding your way through life’s ordeal, Piakus, London

Yalom, ID 2001, The gift of therapy, Piakus Books, London

Zinker, JC 2001, Sketches: an anthology of essays, art and poetry, The Gestalt Press, Cambridge, MA

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