WWWWWillie’s Sillyillie’s Sillyillie’s Sillyillie’s Sillyillie’s Silly

Animal PoemsAnimal PoemsAnimal PoemsAnimal PoemsAnimal Poems

The poems in this collection may not be copied orreproduced in any way without the permission of

the copywright holder.

Copywright © Willie Watson, 2010

Published in 2010Prague, Czech Republic

also by Willie Watson:Poems from Prague

The Guru Kalhehuru and other PoemsFour Syllables on Water

The Alchemist’s NotebookPerfectomundo

with Marie BrozováTarot v básních / Tarot Poems

T A B L E O F C O N T E N T ST A B L E O F C O N T E N T ST A B L E O F C O N T E N T ST A B L E O F C O N T E N T ST A B L E O F C O N T E N T S1. The Primacy of the Aardvark2. The Advantages of Monocellular Reproduction3. The Tragedy of the Armadillo4. Dark Heroes5. The Function of Fantasy6. Dogs and Cats7. The Good Thing About Dinosaurs8. Dogs in the Snow9. The Elephant’s Nose10. The Mystery of the Flamingo11. Giraffes12. Another Poem about Giraffes13. Notes on Etymology and the Relationship between Weight and Environment14. Why We Admire the Ibex15. Baby Kangaroos16. A Question of Ursine Identity17. Inspiration18. The Importance of Being Mammalian19. Narwhals and Unicorns20. Some Interesting Facts about Octopuses21. The Plight of the Polar Bear22. The Effect of Global Warming on Antarctica23. Quails: Only Slightly Luckier Than Dodos24. The Gentle Giant25. Evil Snakes26. Turtles and Tortoises27. Department of Well, Duh28. The Similarity between Vultures and Humans29. The Many Uses of the Water Buffalo30. Perfect in its Place31. Yak Lactation32. Black and White

The Aardvark isn’t swift, or large or even verystrongBut he survives on ants because his nose is verylongBut he really comes in before animals that arespeedierIn any English language encyclopedia

Arthur Amoeba got lonely one daySo he split himself in twoIt may not seem romantic to usBut it’s what amoebas do

It’s a different way of fulfillingThe procreative urgeAmoeba’s always want to splitWhile humans like to merge

No frustrations, no hassles, no jealousyNo lying, no crying, no fussAnd remember: there are more of themThan there are of us

The Armadillo’s endangered, you know’cause they cross the freeway too damned slow

The image that we have of batsIs that of scary, flying ratsThey live in caves, they fly by nightAnd they can give us quite a frightBut like their namesake, played by Adam WestThey rid the world of many evil pests

In cartoons, it’s understoodThat cats are bad and mice are goodThe prey defeats the predatorAnd that is what cartoons are for

A cat is not impressed, as much,as dogs are by the human touchIt’s ironic that people want to ownan animal that just wants to be left alone

If dinosaurs had never disappearedLife on earth would be a little weirdWe complain about traffic, rain and taxesBut we don’t have to deal with TyrannosaurusRexes

I look out from my balconyThe snow is falling through the treesSoftly, softly as you pleaseThe day is still, there is no breeze

A puppy’s playing in the snowJumping, running to and froHe is small, but he will growAnd that’s a pleasing thing to know

His parents also like to playAnd as they swiftly run awayHe gamely follows, in his wayAlthough he’s not as big as they

As I watch them, I can seeA little bit of you and meAnd just the way things ought to bePure and gentle, wild and free

The elephant’s noseIs the finest that growsThey can use it as a trumpetThey can use it as a hoseThey can use it for grabbing and carrying stuffAs a snorkel underwater and if that’s not enoughWhen elephants meet, from different landsThey shake trunks, like we shake hands

Flamingoes have such very long legsI wonder how they don’t break their eggs

People must look funnyIf you happen to be a giraffeI’m guessing that they look at usAnd laugh and laugh and laugh

Giraffes are tall and elegantThey browse upon the leavesOn the African SavannahBlowing gently in the breezeThey are certainly well suitedTo live in these environsWith just one little problem:They taste real good to lions

Hippopotamus, of course,is from the Greek for River HorseIn the water, they feel greatBecause it helps support their weight(Which also explains why our heavier lassesLike the aqua aerobics classes)

The Ibex is a mountain goatOf whom the ancient folks took noteAs a symbol of fertilityBecause of its virilityHalf goat and half manLike the great god Pan

A Joey is a baby kangarooI don’t know why we call them that but,Nonetheless, we do

Koala Bears are very cuteAnd Panda Bears are tooOne lives on Eucalyptus leavesThe other on bambooThis is just to let you knowIf you were unawareThe loveable KoalaIs not, in fact, a bear

It wasn’t leopards, lice or loonsLemmings, larks or lynxesBut the noble Lion, king of beastsWho inspired the sphinxes

Cows and Horses, Dogs and Cats,People, Sheep and CamelsAll feed their babies on Mamma’s milk,and thus are known as mammals.

The Narwhal may be the strangest creaturethat has ever been bornIt swims in the Arctic ocean, and has a single hornWhich is , of course, the definition of a unicorn

Octopuses, octopodes or even octopiAre very unusual creatures,there are several reasons whyThey have no bones so when they need to,they can be quite smallbut among invertebrates,they’re the smartest of them allThey wave their tentacles aroundand have a fine old timeAnd they give birth to two hundred thousand eggsat a single timeBut after having given birth to so many octopiBoth octopodial parentsmay grow very weak and die

The Polar Bears are in a desperate stateTheir shrinking environment makes it hardFor them to find a mateAs the weather changes from blizzardy to drizzlySometimes the Polar Bear’s fate is a little grizzly

Everybody loves penguinsThey’re inherently adorableWhich makes the destruction of their habitatAll the more deplorable

The Quail is a common sort of birdIt gives the hunters a thrillThey’re fat, and slow and not too brightAnd exceptionally easy to kill

The rhinoceros is enormousAnd he has a wicked hornIf you cross him, you will rueThe day that you were bornPersonally, I think that it’s a riotThis frightening beastShould have a vegan diet

Things that crawl across the ground,Stealthily, without a soundThey move by day, they move by nightWith poison in their savage biteAnd just one bite is all it takesTo kill a childEvil Snakes

Turtles and tortoisesRabbits and haresWho knows the difference, and who really cares?Like most people, I’m in the habitOf simply referring to turtles and rabbits

The uakari’s tails are rather short,and they have bright red facesThey behave quite differently,when in different placesIn zoos, they’re very quiet and rather lazyBut in their jungle home they jump like crazy

Vultures aren’t so stupid.They use their ugly head.Just like human beings,they prefer to eat what’s dead

Behold the Water BuffaloBig and ugly, dumb and slowThey thrive in hot and humid weatherThey give us meat, they give us leatherTheir horns are curved and very longTheir milk is rich, their backs are strongTheir somewhat bigger than a cowAnd often used to pull a plowWhich is an important economic factorFor farmers who cannot afford a tractor

The xenops is a tiny birdIn Central and South AmericaIt feeds on the insects in the bark of the treesThroughout the forested area

Roses are red, Yaks milk is pinkSwear to God, some people drink it

Zebras coats are black and whiteThey’re proper and they’re neatThat’s why we think of zebrasEvery time we cross the street