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NDS CEO Meeting Dinner (AUNDSC0512B)

DAVID MOODY: Good evening.

OK. Good evening, everybody. I'm just making sure my microphone is working. For those of you who don't know me, my name is David Moody and I am the State Manager for National Disability Services in sunny Melbourne. We have to remind ourselves that we are sunny.

I would like to acknowledge the Aboriginal people, the traditional owners of the land on which we meet.

I am a Western Bulldogs fan and we are close to their home ground. For those of you staying in Melbourne, you should check out the Melbourne (inaudible), an icon of the west.

Wasn't today a fantastic first day? Joan McKenna Kerr was a fantastic facilitator for us today. We then heard from Jane Prentice who told us that we should take full advantage of the NDIS and look forward to its advantages in the future.

We then heard from Ken, who gave us metaphors aplenty, about light in the hills and many others. We have talked about the three Ps – portals, providers and now (inaudible) registration.

Aaron McEwan then told us about the Paradise paradigm. It was an interesting part of our forum.

We have heard that demand is growing rapidly. Providers are diversifying and opportunity is increasing. It is something like a perfect storm rather than a managed market. This is what we are experiencing in the service sector this year.

Then we heard from David Bowen and others from the NDIA. It was pleasing to hear them identifying many of the same issues that we have been experiencing. We heard them discuss issues and a commonality of purpose. This was where we had a conflict of interest which was defined as you can't lick your own ice cream.

When we talked about licking your own ice cream, this was described as something you are supposed to do. Then we discussed hygiene in the Agency, and what a conflict of interest is or isn't.

Then we discussed the NDS plan going forward, about delivering a high level of care for people with disabilities. Then we heard some really interesting work being done by people doing disability research at Curtin University, a model capable, we hope, of influencing future funding and services for the disability industry.

So, this was the first day of our 2016 NDS CEO meeting. We had a lot happening. The

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lives of people with a disability have a lot happening. I will leave you with a quote – “There are people who watch things happen, people who make things happen and then people who said what happened?”

So, this is the last time I will make a speech tonight. I will now hand over to Neil Saxton. He will say a few words on behalf of HESTA, our major sponsor. Thank you, Neil.

NEIL SAXTON: Thank you. I will also acknowledge that we meet on the lands of the Wurundjeri people. We pay our respects to you and thank you for allowing us to meet on your lands today.

We are working with the NDS as a team with HESTA. Our mission is to plan with you for your retirement. Over 80% of our members are women. We know our members well. Let me say this – you know our members, too.

Our typical member is 43 years old. She works part-time and has taken time out of the workforce to care for children and others. She works 40% less than her male counterpart. She has less than $20,000 in her HESTA account.

We work with our members to build their retirement funds. We see it as part of our responsibility to progress solutions. We welcome the recent legislation that will maintain the low-income super contributions. While its name has changed to LISTO, its intent is the same and over 200,000 HESTA members will retain its benefits in future, of which over 2 million Australians are women.

The ongoing nature of the NDIS will forever change the face of our country. HESTA works with social reforms to deliver dignity in retirement for our members. We look forward to continue working with you in future. Thank you for giving us the opportunity to sponsor your dinner tonight. Enjoy your dinner and the rest of your meeting.

Thank you.

(Applause)

DAVID MOODY: Thanks, Neil. We will take a break at this point and then come back at 8:00 for the recognition awards with Ken Baker and Joan McKenna Kerr.

OK, we will commence the formal part of the evening with our Membership Recognition Awards. Can I appoint Ken Baker and Joan McKenna Kerr to present the recognition awards.

(Applause)

KEN BAKER:



It is my pleasure to introduce the 2016 Membership Recognition Awards. These are important awards for NDS because they recognise the partnership that NDS has with its members and some of these partnerships have endured for many decades.

The awards were introduced in 2012 and they recognise 20 years, 30 years, 40 years and 50 years continuous membership of NDS. So, I would like to congratulate the award recipients this evening because I think to have provided services for that length of time, and for NDS have partnerships with service providers for that length of time, is a very important statement about the importance of partnerships in this sector and we are striving to get better life opportunities for people with disabilities.

We would normally this evening give these award recipients a plaque. At this point I need to pause for an advertisement because (inaudible) at Star Track Express on Thursday in Canberra to deliver the awards overnight, but we didn't say on which night...

(Laughter)

KEN BAKER: And the awards, despite dozens of phone calls, have not arrived. Nevertheless we shall happily invite the award recipients to the stage and we would like to celebrate their success and still have a photo with them and make sure they receive their plaque in due course.

We have 17 award recipients tonight and I would like to hand back to David to invite the winner or the recipient of the 50 years membership recognition award to the stage.

DAVID MOODY: From the 50 years of continuous membership category please will come to the stage, Christian Grieves, Chief Executive Officer of the Westhaven Association.

(Applause)

DAVID MOODY: This is when they would present him with his plaque, but instead they will just pose for a photograph, which you'll get shortly possibly – not through Star Track by the sound of things.

Ken is suggesting we photoshop in the plaque later. 16 members averaged 20 years and 30 years of continuous membership this year. We are pleased to see the number of recipients from the category has grown this evening. Due to time constraints and the postal service, we can't present all of these, but they will be presented in the Membership Recognition Award area off to the side of the stage. It is almost surreal, it is fantastic. Please join us in a round of applause for all of the award recipients.



(Applause)

Those of you who missed the Annual General Meeting earlier this afternoon may not be aware that Jason McKee was elected as a life member by the members of NDS. This is recognition that is rarely bestowed on NDS members and it is an enormous credit to Jason and recognition of his work, not just of NDS, but the disability sector over decades that he has been appointed as a life member.

Jason is here tonight, not just in virtual form but in reality, with his wife Joanna. I will invite him soon. But Jason was on the board of NDS for 14 years and held various offices on the board of NDS. He was the Chair of the National Disability Employment Committee for 11 years and I have to say not once in his 11 years did anyone come and say to me they would like to see him move on. He was a highly respected, highly regarded source of advice and leadership about open employment for people with disabilities.

As we heard this afternoon, he has also been enormously active in international development, establishing an inclusive tool for children in English and a (inaudible) program as well which is 300 families. His work – he doesn't boast about this at all – but his work across the disability sector for decades now has been enormous and he has been a great mentor, I know, and friend to the people in the disability sector.

Jason represented NDS and their predecessor on many government working parties going back to the 1990s. He always had a very sharp mind, still has.

(Laughter)

DAVID MOODY: He does at this stage of the evening. In about an hour or two he won't. Very astute, very sharp mind. He can pull apart statistical analysis, I thought, with great effectiveness, until he said to me on one occasion after having done that that 42.3% of statistics are made up on the spot. It made a lot of space in his analysis after that.

Nevertheless, Jason is a long-time friend of NDS and I see him as a personal friend as well, and I would like you to join with me now in giving a round of applause to Jason.

(Applause)

JASON McKEE: Now I am embarrassed. As I said today, I have got more out of my involvement with the National Disability Services then I’ve put in. Not only have I made really good friends, lifelong friends, together we have been able to assist many people with disabilities to have a better quality of life, thanks to the work that you do.

When we are changing our name from ACROD to NDS, we were thinking, “What should



we call ourselves or what should be the catch cry?” One of the strong voices that came through, and I believe it is time with the NDIS coming in and the untrodden territory, the problems we will have, it is really important that services have one strong voice for government and that is why I believe every one of us should continue to support NDS in the future. Thank you very much.

(Applause)

DAVID MOODY: Thank you, Jason and Ken.

JOAN McKENNA KERR: There were very special moments today, and Jason represents what is really great about the sector. NDS members are made up of very many Jasons. I think Jason represents a very special moment, not just because of what fantastic work he has done but because he also represents the great work that the NDS members are doing.

(Applause)

Now, I come to the great part of the evening where we get to acknowledge a wonderful colleague and that is Vicky O’Halloran. Vicki is a longstanding member of NDS, both in the Northern Territory and on the national stage. She is highly regarded in government and national circles. She is a strong voice for the interests of the sector, where conditions can be challenging.

Vicki was president of the NDS from 2012 to 2015 and has been a board member for a total of almost 15 years. She was Northern Territory Chair from 1998 to 2001 and again after that. She has worked for NDS for more than 20 years. She has been an executive board member and secretary. She has also been the Chair of the Northern Territory Government Advisory Council. She has been on a long list of boards and committees.

As you can see, her list of achievements is outstanding. Vicki is also highly regarded among advocates. She has made higher contributions to people with disabilities. Vicki was made a Member of the Order of Australia for her significant achievements and this year she was a finalist for Australian of the Year.

She has also been a finalist for Northern Territory Businesswoman of the Year. Tonight we recognise her huge contribution to the disability sector and the NDS. It is with great, great pleasure that I invite Vicki O’Halloran to the stage to receive the NDS President's award.

(Applause)

VICKI O’HALLORAN: To say I am overwhelmed would be an understatement. I was sitting there sipping



champagne, thinking that I could relax. When you come into the sector of disability services you think you might not have a whole lot to offer, but I don't think I ever come in thinking that it has a whole lot to offer you.

I resonate with Jason that being a part of National Disability Services has offered me much insight, intelligence and understanding of the sector.

I have made many lifelong friends, and I am honoured to have them as friends. I think we can attest to having made friends for many years.

I can say that I am in shock. It is a pleasure to have worked with National Disability Services and to be able to attend these meetings and conferences and to link with NDS at a time when we are seriously challenged. Thank you again.

(Applause)

DAVID MOODY: Thanks Vicki, Joan and Ken. The night is still young. The main course is on its way. We invite all 20-and 30-year recipients to congregate in the Recognition Awards area.

We will have Ken and Joan pose with the recipients off-stage with their awards absent, but we can photoshop them in later.

(Applause)

DAVID MOODY: OK, in response to some requests from the floor, we thought we would do the recipients of these awards the courtesy and honour of reading out their names publicly.

They are Carol Smail, CEO of ACL Disability Services. Julie McConnell, both of whom receive a 30-year award. Margaret Vincent and Gerdeep Massent both of whom receive 30-year service awards.

Kristy Nair from (inaudible) in Sydney, a 30-year service award. Mel Hardank from Montagu in Tasmania, a 30-year award. Hugh Packard, 30-year service award from New South Wales. Tony Clinch, 30-year service working with (inaudible) Services as General Manager.

Tony Moet a 30-year award as General Manager of (inaudible) from Western Australia. Debbie Mitchell, a 30-year service award. And finally Anne Summers, manager of Parkside Services, a 30-year service award.

Thank you, people, we are all congregating over to my left.

(BREAK)



DAVID MOODY: Ladies and gentlemen, if I could have your attention for a second - our keynote speaker is a neuropsychologist and futurist and ideally suited to speak on 'lead to change', especially cultural change.

Dr Tony Bianco is a founding president of the DaVinci Institute, a leading futurist think tank in Rome offering advice to organisations and entrepreneurs and clients such as Warren Buffett, Mark Zuckerburg and the late (Inaudible).

He helps facilitate change, and full engagement, in work and life in order to create what he calls the ‘preferred future’. Tony encourages leaders to inspire, imagine and innovate, as well as not only creatively manage their time, but also their energy. He maintains that successful, fully-engaged leaders must be collaborative in order to excel.

He has a Masters in Business Leadership and Neuropsychology from Cambridge University in the UK. His bestselling book entitled ‘22nd Century Mega Leading’ describes how leading, partnering, influencing, networking, and innovative thinking will evolve over the next century. He will be working with NDS in a specialist consulting role.

Please welcome him with me.

DR TONY BIANCO: Thank you, ladies and gentlemen, for your kind welcome. Thank you, David, for your illustrious introduction. David told me he was nervous about delivering it, but you should not have been, David. Of all the introductions I have had at conference dinners worldwide, that is by far the most recent. Thank you.

People ask me if I get nervous. But it is natural for Italians to speak in public and private. David told me about a recent Australia-wide survey that says that your number one fear is public speaking.

Not only number one, but death and dying was rated number four! So, it is a sure bet that at your next funeral, the person giving the eulogy would prefer to be in the wooden box in front.

I really do like starting a presentation off with some humour. As we Italians know, laughter keeps the soul refreshed. Many people say I joke around a bit too much. They say if I were a lawyer, I would be disbarred for making so much fun out of life.

Please, keep your applause for later. I have a really weak finish!

I really do appreciate the opportunity briefly to give you a bit of a peek as to what the future holds, and what we really need to do to surely lead change and, indeed, to drive



cultural change in disability services.

Exhaustive research that we have at the DaVinci Institute where we brainstorm creative processes tells us if you are not willing to embrace change, you are not really ready to lead. Put simply, leadership is not a static endeavour. In fact, it demands fluidity which requires a willingness to recognise the need for change, and finally, the ability to lead change.

As much as some people want to create a complexity around the topic of leading change, the reality is creating, managing and leading change is really quite simple.

I promise I will not bombard you with too many texts. But I will encompass the following – leading with culture, creating that sense of urgency, all this is important.

Removing obstacles. In addition to these behaviours, as David said, we need to be agile, nimble, collaborative and creative and, of course, confident. Confidence is crucial, even when speaking. Especially if you want to genuinely take on the political, social, economic, environmental and legal challenges that lie ahead for all of you.

There will always be twists and turns, scepticism, opportunism, and you really need courage to get to where you want to be as a CEO. And courage does not always roar. Often it is a little voice at the end of the day that says, "I will try again tomorrow."

Many of you will be proud of what you do, your role as conscientious, mission-driven, empathetic, resilient, hearty souls who truly make results that matter, often putting your hands up when it matters.

You are there in times of peace and conflict and war. You are everywhere because you care. Many of you are the epitome of past, present and future. You are often the bridge-builders. You are the peace-brokers, the mood-breakers. The peacemakers, and the change-makers. You are the common sense makers of the claim, the keepers of the flame. You are societal science and art, the core of friendships, the family's heart, players of the major part. And that, my friends, is only the start.

(Applause)

A little bit more. I am pissing in your pocket at the moment.

Your professional humour, vision, values, and ethics, your patience and expert knowledge, tells all of you that you really care, you have that synergy that shows that you are open to create your preferred future – through imagination, innovation, inspiration, perspiration and collaboration.

One thing I know – you have a wonderful, you know, 'how you can do it' attitude.



You have integrity, tenacity, humility and confidence. And there is a lot of talk these days about the word 'confidence'. In sport... The level of confidence we all have as CEOs is often the difference between success, mediocrity and failure.

Quite often, me included, we stifle confidence, even at senior management level, by how we think. We get caught up in that paralysis of analysis when we catastrophise, that ‘stinking thinking’ that stifles confidence and creates fear. And how many of us remember when the 21st-century opened in fear of the millennium computer bug that potentially we would cripple civilisation? And the only ones capable of saving us were those super-nerdy programming geniuses. Maybe some are here today.

The noughties are a near-death experience, and then we have the climate sceptics...visiting us in Honolulu.

We have been grappling with heartless and faceless acts under Islam.

We have bird flu, swine flu. I actually rang up the hotline but all I got was ‘crackling’.

(Laughter)

There is a special bird flu hotline in the canary islands.

You might want to look away. In 2015, just last year, the CIA found a very disturbing photo of how swine flu was actually created.

From wrestling, I learned a lot of valuable rules that can be used in business services and leadership. The highlight came when I was in the Italian Junior Wrestling Championship in 1990. In my third belt, I was facing the Russian Yuri Cherkov.

He was credited as the holder in sport of the Ukrainian death lock. His eyes were burning into mine like laser eyes. I shut down as I heard the rattle of the death count. One, two…

His eyes were on my testicle. I lunged forward with the only weapon I had. My teeth.

A hush went over the audience. I had escaped from the inescapable. It is truly amazing what you can do when your testicle is in danger.

A little more humour. Just last week, I was touring the wonderful state of Victoria and I noticed a truly Australian icon that has been around for 200 years. It is called ‘the dunny’. European historicists are fascinated. It can withstand fire, wind and drought, as well as other things, on a daily basis. So much is recognised by the EU Housing Committee, it is the most durable structure on earth.

But enough humour. Each and every one, you know, we have inherited the boundary-



less world. Sometimes we have to get on our way to launch the fundamentals. Many of you know the icon, the Italian Henry Ford, the man who in 1908 created a new era in personal transportation. He once said, "Thinking must be the hardest work of all which is why so few engage in it."

When an even more famous Italian than myself, CEO Mr Christopher Columbus, set out in 1492 on his personal journey, he did not know where he was going, and when he got there he did not know where he was and how to get back. He was leading.

For many of us, leading cultural change can be like being caught in a whirlpool. We would rather be sipping pina coladas. We are sitting in a whirlpool but it is there that we can imagine and truly lead cultural change.

It will influence how successful we will be. We can focus on what the individual needs, personal services. This is all important. Imaginatively and creatively, this has been important for leaders who are pioneering and who are going to excel.

Another leader is the late and legendary Aussie media mogul Reg Grundy who died earlier this year. He was on his $5 million superyacht. But he surely knew how important meeting change was through imagination and innovation. He was pioneering Australian ideas, spinning wheels and soap operas.

He was quick to seize on TV in 1960. He's synonymous with leading TV, his pioneering brilliance, the audience wanted to watch. He provided a cultural change and client service approach in enterprise. He was imaginative, inspirational, collaborative with his many employees in improving customer relationship and efficiency of outcomes. The many programs he created inspired your brightest and best talent off-screen. He is your highest innovator.

He understood that (inaudible) can be energising. And here he might have some Italian in him. He was not afraid of internal competition, disagreement and conflict. These days, psychologists and cognitive neuroscientists like Jordan, the lovely man on my table, they tell us that our emotional human brain at any level has an enormous need for art, poetry and play that frankly a lot of businesses do not understand.

Because in the past 20 years we have moved from economies of scale to economies of soul, expression as human beings. Each and every one of us are ambassadors in business, leading and inspiring. All of us should be leaders of cultural change and have an outwardly leadership mindset.

Let me share with you a little anecdote, when I went scuba diving. That is me on the screen, on the left. I have a mask on my head. My wife says I look better with a mask on my head. The difference between me and George Clooney is 12 scotches.

There was a fish that was in the same tiny area, named after the bonbon fish, named



after a similar item of confectionery. This bonbon fish has a cube of water that is 1 m x 1 m x 1 m and he never leaves it.

The CEO in the office should be described as the bonbon fish. This environment is not conducive to change. It is important to get out of our own cubic metre of ocean. Our hearts and minds must be always out there in disability services and the marketplace. Like it or not, our friend Jordan Nguyen says... the 1980s about cultural change, 1990s...

The 2000s should be about (inaudible). Unlike the bonbon fish, we should not be victims, we should not be afraid of change. We should be change-makers.

Quite often, if you also change your perspective – it's really important – if you change the way you look at things, other things will change. Can other people see two old ladies or two young ladies in this photo? Is that the wife or mistress?

And let me tell you, the world's greatest entrepreneurs and leaders know how to lead change, especially cultural change.

Does anyone know who this is? He was a baby-faced kid a few years ago and wanted to make change to the (inaudible) a few days ago? Is it Barack Obama? No. Not Hugh Hefner. Richard Neville, no. You are close. Richard Branson, yes. Someone who certainly does think different.

Well, he hit the jackpot when he worked out that monopolies were getting fat and lazy, being unfriendly, ironically, to clients. He took on the record companies and Virgin became a landmark. Now he has a stable of 400 diverse entities that all flourished under the Virgin umbrella.

Virgin, like some of you people, respects eccentricity and fun. He had a slight respect for bureaucracy and formal commitment but he really hired...the right people that were motivated to do their best. He gave them a key role and then proceeded to give them a few things, faith, encouragement, (inaudible).

Branson chose to lead change and inspire, through often humorous, eccentric collaboration. He chose courage over fear in a playful way. Your attitude really dictates your altitude. If you don't have the right knowledge and information as a CEO, you should go out and get it.

There is a very good chance he is a right-brainer. I won't get too much into it. We know the right-brainers are the arty types.

Let's have a bit of an activity. See this chart here, look at the chart and say the colour but not the word to yourself. Apparently, this tells you if you are a right- or left-brainer.



If you are right-brainer, put your right hand up. If you are left-brainer, put your left hand up. If you did not put your hand up, it is a no-brainer, but that's another one.

(Laughter)

I cannot emphasise how important humour, play and creativity is for imagination and innovation and leadership. If you want happy workers, give them time to play and love. Losing the power to love means you lose the power to think. Serious play is not an oxymoron, but the essence of leadership.

One of the greatest ever humanitarians that ever lived, the Italian, Mahatma Gandhi, said this – “If I had no sense of humour, I would have long ago committed suicide.”

Again, humour is by far the most significant activity of the human brain. Jordan may testify to this. Neuroscientists will say that if you exercise your brain beyond your current limits, you create new neural pathways in your mind, which in layman's terms means that you 'use it or lose it', and if you habitually stretch your mind, like Homer Simpson, the obvious solution to a problem, you will be permanently opening up new neural pathways.

The message is all of us should strive to be like children – intentionally discover and play and challenge ourselves to open our minds. This is about creativity, the illuminating attitude, that anybody can cultivate and expand on. EQ now surpasses IQ as a key determinant of success at work and at play. Especially if you show these wonderful traits like gratitude, humour, optimism, adaptability, philanthropy... Very big things for leaders.

How many of you remember in the context of these values, over a decade ago, before the tumultuous events in Syria, Nice, Paris, the Ukraine and Libya, we watched from our living rooms as the giant copper bronze pillar of Saddam Hussein toppled and then dangled akimbo parallel to the desert sands of his ancient kingdom?

Mostly we breathed a sigh of relief, but others felt invaded, abandoned, fanning the embers of resistance and revenge. For you back home at the time, things could not be better. Terrorism, Iraq and Afghanistan were tethered to another world that you did not want to know about.

One of the most beautiful beaches on the planet to your near north, you took a hit in the heart. A vast army of the unseen had emerged on your doorstep, and 'she'll be right' was on the cards.

The rules have changed, but instead of battening down, you Aussies rose up - "Bugger them," you said. And pursued la dolce vita - the sweet life. It is your unique quality. You are clever, how you market raw capital. Australia Fair is endowed with glittering opportunities. You derive rich benefits from your open society, but occasionally the



black dogs of greed, self-interest, the pursuit of power and egomania etc. are constantly trotting along beside you on your journeys.

Occasionally, one gets off the lead and shits in another's kennel, as you say. And if you cannot deflect that, you get tied to the pillory and flogged. If there's anything left, you are picked up, transported to the gallows and hung by the neck until you are really dead.

If you survive that, you are made an honorary diplomat, you get a gold card, an ambassadorship and a handshake. And they will piss you off. Until you become a pisspot independent and the glorious cycle is complete.

The beautiful thing about it is that while you object to it, you Australians, and bitch about it, you always find the funny side. You never forget to implement that wonderful trait and enjoy the journey. It's important.

That is actually me in a kangaroo suit. Seriously, the great Italian statesman, prevalent during World War II, Winston Churchill, said, "To improve is to change, to be perfect is to change often." He also said, “A great change leader creates other change leaders.”

And, of course, the world itself has changed. Changing the way we look at change, constantly transforming conditions, technology and opportunity. Creating more challenges, so we must act swiftly, creatively and efficiently, in order to stay competitive and survive. This is relevant to all of you. Let me share with you a little story on a philanthropic ophthalmologist who has led change to make the world a better place.

40 years ago, Dr Govindappa Venkataswamy in 1976, he started a global juggernaut from an eye clinic in a hospital basement in Madurai, restrained by the high cost of a pair of intra-ocular lenses, $200, an impossible amount for his cash-poor clients. His vast organisation has gone on to make a pair of these glasses and saving lenses for less than $4.50, the price you would pay for a skinny latte.

Dr V’s eye care system is restoring vision in 85 countries. His masterly innovation is the largest and most productive eye care facility in the world.

This is relevant to all of you. He said, "Intelligent and capability are not enough – there must also be the joy of doing something beautiful." And maybe this is true for many of you. Wonderful people in disability services who are doing something beautiful like Dr V, many of you are making a positive imprint on the world, impacting people in unconventional ways.

Many of you unconventional people are traditionally great change-makers. Embrace the future and lead change. Many of us will need to understand that the increasing complexity of workplaces will force us to be change-enablers, great communicators, active listeners, with flexibility and agility.



Imagine the type of innovative communication skills you need to persuade many of today's global leaders who look like they should be on the set of the latest Muppet movie rather than in office.

We have not in living memory being exposed to such a colourful range of audacious individuals. The man of the moment – Donald Trump – he looks like he has fallen headfirst into a fairy floss machine.

He is an interesting man, Donald Trump. He often appears on 'Fox', ironically, because a fox often appears on his head!

His big concern is security. At the rally on the weekend, he was surrounded by Secret Service agents after a man tried to rush the stage. The Secret Service said the man was dangerous and disturbed, but they had to protect him anyway.

(Laughter)

Proving once and for all, the best way to keep everyone safe and sound is to build a wall around Donald Trump, you know?

I imagine the first time the Secret Service were in an event where someone is trying to strike Trump, they yell out, "Donald, duck!" (Mimics Donald Duck)

Seriously, what sort of future will we have with Donald Trump as President? Speculation is rife that the Oval Office may be turned into a casino, the White House grounds may have a 120-storey Trump Tower erected, and the presidential jet might now be known as ‘Hair Force One’.

Nearly 70% of Americans said that a Trump presidency would make them anxious, 30% said it would make them Canadian.

(Inaudible) trying to destroy the personal library of President Trump – both of his books had been lost. And Trump was devastated as he had not finished colouring in the second one.

(Laughter)

OK, no more. You must have the right attitude, skills and competency. But you need capital. Where I grew up in Rome was very tough – you could walk ten blocks without leaving the scene of a crime. We were so poor my mother used to buy my clothes from the local army disposal store. It was not too bad if you didn’t not mind going to school dressed like a Japanese admiral.

I only had two friends – they were both imaginary, and they only talked to each other.



I was under the impression as a child that my dad did not like me because he hardly did anything with me – he only took me fishing once. I remember swimming back to shore...

I only went golfing once with my dad, and I swam back to shore thinking that golf is a lot like fishing.

Folks, we are coming to the climax. I don't know if you're getting a bit nervous, flying on Alitalia, and I don't carry travel insurance. I want it to be a tragedy when I die.

We sit in the last row of the plane because who has heard of a plan backing into something? When I was researching back at the office, I discovered a chance of there being a bomb on a plane was 1 million to one. That's not good enough for me. I will take a bomb with me. The computer tells me my chances of there being two bombs on one flight are astronomical.

We won't go into any more plane jokes.

To imagine, innovate, inspire together, you celebrate your camaraderie. So, you should dance a little. Zorba dances that the Greeks do are great. So we will kick off now. Stand up... You must do this. The first ever NDS Zorba dance. Please.

Stop the music. Very simple – you just link with the person next to you, hold their hands or around their thing. Push your chairs in so you have room.

Alright… We are going to go 1, 2, 3, kick, clockwise. Then anti-clockwise, 1, 2, 3, kick. When you kick, give me a little bit of an 'Oi' from the loins. Ready when you are at the back, Mr Music.

Clockwise first. Nice and loud.

(Music plays)

1, 2, 3 kick. Other way. And the ‘Oi’ too. Make it loud. That is good, up the back. Five more minutes.

We will get your heart-rate to about 200.

That's beautiful at the back.

Now, we will have a geographical 'Oi'. I will throw the dice. Alright, from Victoria… If you are from Victoria, the 'Oi'.

AUDIENCE: Oi!



DR TONY BIANCO: New South Wales? Please.

South Australia! South Australia!

Northern Territory!

AUDIENCE: Oi!

DR TONY BIANCO: Good. Western Australia.

ACT!

Queensland!

AUDIENCE: Oi!

DR TONY BIANCO: South Australia! Tasmania!

AUDIENCE: Oi!

DR TONY BIANCO: If you are 20 to 30…

AUDIENCE: Oi!

DR TONY BIANCO:30 to 40…

AUDIENCE: Oi!


AUDIENCE: Oi!




AUDIENCE: Oi!

DR TONY BIANCO:50 to 60...

AUDIENCE: Oi!

DR TONY BIANCO:Everyone jumping on the spot. Clap your hands, thank you, ladies and gentlemen. Thank you.

Please be seated. Thank you.

(Applause)

Please be seated. I like organising my own standing ovation.

(Laughter)

You've been a wonderful audience. Thank you for having me. I really do believe that what you people do is just sensational stuff. Those of you who don't know, I do this professionally. I really do have very much humour, it's a big part of my life. I am known as 'the corporate imposter'. I travel all around Australia, and internationally, pretending I am something I am not. Thank you for having me. Have a great evening and God bless. Thank you.

(Applause)

DAVID MOODY: Thank you, Tony Bianco. I'm sure we will not look at a kangaroo in the same way again. And now for dessert. Thank you.

(BREAK)

(Music plays)

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