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The Merry-Go-Round – Carousel Symbol Paper

By Fiona Werle

Mer·ry-go-round (mĕr′ē-gō-round′) n.

1. A revolving circular platform fitted with seats, often in the form of animals, ridden for amusement.

2. A piece of playground equipment consisting of a small circular platform that revolves when pushed or pedalled.

3. A busy round; a whirl: a merry-go-round of parties.

American Heritage® Dictionary of the English Language, Fifth Edition. Copyright © 2016 by Houghton Mifflin Harcourt Publishing Company. Published by Houghton Mifflin Harcourt Publishing Company.

Carousel

American English: from French carrousel and Italian carosello, roundabout (British English)

[1] or merry-go-round, is an amusement ride consisting of a rotating circular platform with seats for riders. The "seats" are traditionally in the form of rows of wooden horses or other animals mounted on posts, many of which are moved up and down by gears to simulate galloping, to the accompaniment of looped circus music.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Carousel

Cover photo Merry-Go-Round, taken by Fiona Werle in Luna Park, Sydney 2014

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A Brief History of the Carousel

Early Carousels

The modern carousel emerged from early jousting traditions in Europe and the Middle East.

Knights would gallop in a circle while tossing balls from one to another; an activity that

required great skill and horsemanship. This game was introduced to Europe at the time of the

Crusades from earlier Byzantine and Arab traditions. The word carousel originated from the

Italian garosello and Spanish carosella meaning "little battle", used by crusaders to describe a

combat preparation exercise and game played by Turkish and Arabian horsemen in the 12th

century. This early device was essentially a cavalry training mechanism; it prepared and

strengthened the riders for actual combat as they wielded their swords at the mock enemies.

By the 17th century, the balls had been dispensed with, and instead the riders had to spear

small rings that were hanging from poles overhead and rip them off. Cavalry spectacles that

replaced medieval jousting, such as the ring-tilt, were popular in Italy and France. The device

consisted of carved horses and chariots suspended by chains from arms radiating from a

centerpole. The game began to be played by commoners, and carousels soon sprung up at

fairgrounds across Europe. At the Place du Carrousel in Paris, an early make believe carousel

was set up with wooden horses for the children.

By the early 18th century carousels were being built and operated at various fairs and

gatherings in central Europe and England. Animals and mechanisms would be crafted during

the winter months and the family and workers would go touring in their wagon train through

the region, operating their large menagerie carousel at various venues. These early carousels

had no platforms; the animals would hang from chains and fly out from the centrifugal force

of the spinning mechanism. They were often powered by animals walking in a circle or

people pulling a rope or cranking.

Modern carousels

By the mid-19th century the platform carousel was developed; the animals and chariots were

fixed to a circular floor that would suspend from a centre pole and rotate around. These

carousels were called dobbies and were operated manually by the operator or by ponies.

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In England, the carousel became a popular fixture at fairs. When the power of steam was

applied to carousels, the elaborate machines we think of today became possible. In 1870, a

similar innovation to the more traditional mount of the horse, invented by Frederick Savage,

had gears installed and offset cranks on the platform carousels, thus giving the animals their

well-known up-and-down motion as they travelled around the centre pole. The platform

served as a position guide for the bottom of the pole and as a place for people to walk or other

stationary animals or chariots to be placed. He called this ride the 'Platform Gallopers'. He

also developed the 'platform-slide' which allowed the mounts to swing out concentrically as

the carousel built up speed. Fairground organs (music) were often present, if not built in,

when these machines operated. Eventually electric motors were installed and electric lights

added, giving the carousel its classic look.

Artist, Kurt Godwin ‘the alchemy of the carousel’.

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Introduction

Riding the white horse of the Merry-Go-Round, the young girl was compelled by intuitive

instincts that she had never before experienced, to ride the metaphor of life, galloping into the

collective unconscious to the realm of the archetypal imagery. The movements imitating that

of the alchemical process, allowing rider to experience the tension of opposites whilst held in

the crucible chamber, riding deep into the unconscious, in and out, each movement bringing

her to a state of shamanic dreaming, to be brought up from the depths the very essence of life

experienced in the conscious state leading towards the becoming, the beginning of the

process of individuation.

The carousel is the universal connotation associated with the symbolism of the idealised

innocence of youth. Metaphorically the carousel is the vessel from which the alchemical

process is transformed. A universal archetype of the collective unconscious, the carousel

propels the rider to the depths for them to merge to the personal unconscious with a new

found inner knowledge of struggle, a ‘little battle’, beginning within, symbolically a

recognition of the separation of the elements of the alchemy, with the separation of the parts,

a wholeness is experienced, the purpose ignited within to find self-awareness the true

alchemical goal.

The conscious world is depicted by the image of the carousel, as it turns and recoils in its

snake like movement. An ouroboric symbol of Birth, which takes the rider towards Great

Mother, Separation of world Parents, Birth of Hero and finally to Slaying of the Mother

Dragon (Neumann, 1973). This is a glimpse of life’s passage for the young girl, myself, the

spiritual serpent the image of the unconscious process unfolding, igniting the tension of the

opposites. The carousel an ancient image of battle and war, the modern carousel associated

with fun and joy – another tension of opposites.

The combination of the elements that make up the image of the carousel, the colours, the

movements, the sound transport this image into a living mandala. Two white horse, two red

horses, all with black hooves, black tails, the central pole white with its red ribbon winding

down as if leading your eye under the platform, the roof with it’s red, yellow and gold stripes

edged by a red areola to form the nipple. As the rider, I became a fundamental part of the

mandala, I experienced suggestive contemplation and meditation. A profound experience of

the elemental truths of life, the unseen became seen, the alchemical process I experienced

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thrust me into the unseen, yet it was here that the ego was faced with the ‘little battle’ and

met head on with the ‘Terrible Mother’.

Alchemy is a philosophical tradition practiced throughout Europe, Egypt and Asia. It aimed

to purify, mature and perfect certain objects. The alchemist was in search of the philosopher’s

stone. “The alchemist projected what I have called the process of individuation into the

phenomena of the chemical change, to change, magically from one to another more valuable,

one who carries the ancient function of metaphor, as it was of alchemy” (Jung C. G., 1973).

Re-birth

The Sacred Feminine

Mary Magdalene, is Artemis the moon goddess or "great mother goddess" who holds the

tension of opposites as the Goddess or the ‘Feminine Christ’. Morgan Le Fey is the sacred

feminine energy attained in the vessel of the carousel. The unleashing of the alchemical fire is

to gain insight into the role of the sacred feminine. Awakening this in me, perhaps meant the

death of the animus, to awaken to the divine is to experience the ‘little battle’. In this one

moment, is the paradox of losing oneself, but finding oneself, losing sight of the animus, only

to find it within the powerful one, Morgan held the power in her sword. This phallic symbol

expressing masculinity, but in this instance the differentiation of masculine and feminine

elements in the personality is re-united.

The carousel ride was preparing me; This early device was essentially a cavalry training

mechanism, it prepared and strengthened the riders for actual combat as they wielded their

swords at the mock enemies. My archetypal Morgan had found her sword. As I gazed into the

mirrors on the central pole was this to highlight the differentiation of the masculine and

feminine, did these central mirrors enable the rider to see one’s own shadow, illuminating the

new consciousness, or in this case the pieces reflecting back; highlighting glimpses of aspects

of oneself.

Estelle Weinrib says of the carousel; “the symbol of life. It makes and uses energy. It’s an

essential life force at the centre, unplanned. The god is hooked to the carousel. God came

from the carousel, coalesced out of it. Or maybe it’s the other way around, the carousel came

from God” (pg. 190).

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Did the carousel set off an alchemical process ‘to realise psychic expression’ and allow me to

move forward in stages of self-development, if so this surely served to heighten my

awareness of the chaotic circumstance of my life. Was my great despair now hidden behind a

façade, played out in unexpressed rage that would in my later teenage years be expressed

through my destructive behaviour.

Surely if the carousel was an image of alchemy and leading toward the steps of wholeness

and perfection, then the internal division I felt and came to know well, hindered this

purification. Was I indeed the child of the devil, was it my lot to be cast down into purgatory

to dwell in the darkness of insanity, just like that of my maternal grandmother. The child was

returned to the womb and reborn, the magical changes transported her to a different time, a

different place, where she met up with the lady of the lake, Morgan Le Fay, the Faery

Goddess, capable of flying and shape shifting (Geoffrey of Monmouth, 1150). I am Morgan,

as I ride my white horse, I am one with the collective conscious of the great Goddess spirit.

Emerged in this realm I shape shift to a parallel world, unconscious though I return, changed

by the experience, unaware of what progressed in the ancient domain of the womb of the

ancient priestess. I rode my white pony down into the waters, to become an initiate, the child

priestess who carried within her the knowledge awakened through the crucible of change, the

alchemy igniting the fire held within the image of the carousel. As she emerged from the

lakes murky waters, she was transformed, shape shifting from the innocent child to changed

child.

“No longer do outer opposites stand in my way, but my own opposite comes toward me, and

rises up hugely before me, and we block each other’s way. The word of the serpent certainly

defeats the danger, but my way remains barred, since I then had to fall from paralysis to

escape blindness. I cannot reach the blinding power of the sun, just as he/she, the Powerful

One cannot reach the ever-fruitful womb of darkness. I seem to be denied power, while

he/she is denied rebirth, but I escape the blindness that comes with power and he/she escapes

the nothingness that comes with death. My hope for the fullness of the light shatters, just as

his/her longing for boundless conquered life shatters. I had felled the strongest, and

God/Goddess climbs down to mortality” (Jung C., The Red Book Liber Novus A Reader’s

Edition, 2009, pp. 285-286).

Perhaps the motion of the merry-go-round, the rhythmic motion of the horse going up and

down, with the rhythm of the music, allowed the active imagination to expand, the white

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horse echoed my as yet untapped intuition, perhaps on that day I did experience divinity

within the womb of the Goddess. I was being prepared and strengthened for the “little battle”,

an interplay between intrapsychic and interpersonal phenomena in my mind. My life as I

interpreted it, my family, my environment, my “inseparable relationships”, this formed my

unus mundus, (Jung, 1963) but I had not found my balance, I had not gained illumination or

unity, I was only 7 years of age, my battle had just begun. I had not found God, I had found

something greater, more personal, and the enormity of what I experienced was the

centralising process, just a beginning. My carousel had transported me to the collective

unconscious, to the realm of my ancient ancestors, my Hungarian ancestors whose belief’s

and ancient ways ran through my blood. I was now treading and crossing over, in a place

where West meets East, where the words change, where another change becomes magic, I

was preparing to meet up with the shamanic realm, upon my white horse I would give the

ultimate sacrifice, that of Self.

The Ancient Magyars/Hungarians- My Blood

The Ancient Practice of Tengriism, Shamanism and Ancient Worship of the Sky Gods.

One of the titles of God in Hungarian mythology was Hadúr, who wears pure copper and is a

metalsmith. The ancient Magyars followed Steppe Tengriism it was said they sacrificed white

stallions to him before a battle. Herodotus mentions in his Histories an Eastern custom, where

sending a white horse as payment in exchange for land means casus belli (Tengrism, 2016).

One of the oldest religions in the world, Tengriism is said to have originated sometime in the

Bronze Age between 3600 and 1200 B.C. Developed by the people of the Altai Mountains in

Central Asia, it is a monotheistic religion with heavy elements of ancestor worship. There is

no holy book as in other religions and much of the early belief system has fallen out of our

collective knowledge. Even older evidence places the ancient Magyars or Uyghurs as

decedents from the Sumerians.

A recurrent characteristic that is found throughout Hungarian history is the duality - within

multiplicity: there are always two main components assembled in such a way that they

constitute a solid unity, complementary to each other like male/female, black/white,

north/south, east/west, consisting in two ethnic unities that vary from one period to another,

resulting in the complexity that has generated all the different approaches and theories about

the origins. This duality, expressed in the first legend through the twins Hunor and Magor,

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figures of the most representative ancestors of modern Hungarians, namely Huns and

Magyars, existed since the very beginning: the first pair were Sumerians and Scythians. Since

there is an interdependence between both components, before going on dealing with the

Sumerians and their evolution, it is necessary to consider the Scythians in order to have a

comprehensive view of the whole picture. “The Scythians possessed the land of Chaldea

(Mesopotamia) for 1500 years before any other nations and they are the oldest people of the

earth vying even the Egyptians in ancestry” Trogus Pompeiu. (Csaba, n.d.). Greek sources

refer to those peoples as "Sapir/Sabir", "Makr/Magar" and "Matiene". All these terms point

out to the denomination of two Hungarian tribes: Sabirs and Magyars.

The Sabirs seem to be the oldest group from which Sarmatians originated, as they dwelled in

a vast area from Central Asia to the heart of Europe. Indeed, the name "Siberia" (Sibir') is

ascribed to them, but also the Roman name of the western area of present-day Hungary was

"Sabaria", and was indeed, inhabited by Sarmatians. The writer István Gyárfás in his work

"The History of the Jász-Kun", vol. I, reports that the Greek geographer Ptolemy mentioned

the Jász dwelling in present-day Szombathely, Hungary. The Jász were known by the

Romans as "Sabarians" or "Savarians". Byzantine documents concerning the Hungarian

prince Termatzu from Árpád's lineage assert that the oldest name of the Hungarians was

"Sabartoi Asphali", recalling their ancient Mesopotamian name Subar-tu and Sabir-ki, while

Asphali was the Arab name of the Lower Zab river, in Assyria (Storm, The Ultimate

Encyclopedia of Mythology, 1999).

Herodotus asserted that the Sarmatians were the offspring of Scythian males and the

infamous warrior Amazons. Penthesileia the Queen of the Amazons was the daughter of

Ares. Arctinus of Miletus, The Aethiopis Fragment 2 (from Scholiast on Homer's Iliad 24.

804) :

"Then came [Penthesileia] the Amazon, the daughter of great-souled Ares the slayer of men."

(Csaba, n.d.).

In Virgil’s Aeneid, “The Amazons were there in their thousands with their crescent shields

and their leader Penthesilea in the middle of her army, ablaze with passion for war” (Trojan

war) (Dhwyt, 2016).

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Penthesilea in the middle of her army upon her white horse

The Shamanic Dance of The Carousel Rider

The rider of the merry-go-round sits astride their horse, holding on tight as the shamanic

motion of the turning movement in an ant-clockwise direction sends them into a trance like

state. In this state the rider descends into the personal unconscious, pulled by the up and

down motion of the ride that ebbs them deeper, tipping in and out of the waters, to eventually

land in the collective unconscious where the ancestors reside. Here the rider becomes one

with the archetypes, she experiences their energy in all the forms, she is transported to a time

and a place that is unknown, yet known.

Hungarian blood runs through my veins, shamanic voices urge me on, ancient ancestors call

my name, tell me to be at one with the shamanic journey, that all is safe, that it is time. This

is my experience of that moment in time when I emerged from a state of unconscious

awareness to awaken into the motion of the transcendent function. Now I could have a

dialogue with my ancient ancestors, tapping into the collective unconscious, the archetypal

images were now set free and the conscious process was in motion. “This dialogue is

dependent on both self-regulating feedback systems between autonomous unconscious

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phenomena and the ego’s development, as well as the imaginative and creative interplay

between subject and object, psyche and matter. Both healing and meaning emerge out of

these ongoing dialogues. The medieval alchemist proclaimed “as above so below”;

contemporary analysts would add “as within, so without, “and vice versa” (Salman, 2009, p.

58).

I had landed in the primordial soup which contains all things, I was the alchemy, I was the

alchemist, I was the alchemical equation. Jung referred to these living and inseparable

relationships as unus mundus, a medieval philosophy meaning one unitary world, the

primordial soup. Undoubtedly the idea of the unus mundus is founded on the assumption that

the multiplicity of the empirical world rests on an underlying unity, and not that two or more

fundamentally different worlds exists side by side or are mingled with one another. (Salman,

2009).

Everything divided and different belongs to one and the same world, I found myself in the

mandala of my ancestors, the mandala of Tengri. “That even the psychic world, which so

extraordinarily different from the physical world, does not have its roots outside the one

cosmos is evident from the undeniable fact that causal connections exist between the psyche

and the body which point to their underlying unitary nature” (CW 13, pg. 538 as cited in The

Cambridge Companion to Jung).

Mandala reflects Tengri Symbol and the Quandary

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The Beginning Story; the Trigger

What was my trigger to this beginning story and what is the symbolic recognition? For me I

know true well the moment of walking into an op shop to scrounge for sandplay miniatures

and coming across my wooden carousel. I am not sure if I picked the piece or it picked me. I

do know that a wind up musical wooden carousel with moving parts is or is not an ideal

object for sandplay, especially in a wet tray, and working with many children as I do. So

again, I wonder at why I felt the urge to obtain this piece? I understand now, that having this

piece in my collection has served a vital role, to have my memory triggered, but that was not

the whole picture. I sat for many weeks with the carousel on my shelf, a low shelf where

children could access it easily. Even this act of seeing children move towards and pick up this

object; I would freeze, tense up and think “oh no, they are going to ruin it”, and yet each time

these children seemed to sense the precious nature of this object. Their fascination equalled

that of mine. They were so gentle, so curious. I had to ponder this for many weeks, I had to

sit with my confusion, that this image had stirred in me. Once I could distance myself from

this image, I watched intently for how it was used in the sand tray and what I discovered

within my own knowledge amazed me.

In my observation of children between the ages of 6 – 12 years, was that they were attracted

to the carousel, but not always as an object for their sandplay. Some were simply curious as

to what it was, what it did and I would explain that it was a carousel, a merry-go-round. I

would wind it up for them and together we would watch the movement, listen to the music.

And so, through their questioning, their childlike curiosity, this triggered in me my own

childhood experience of many years ago, it awakened in me my memory, my vivid

experience of my carousel ride, and I remembered the day my psychic development

manifested. The children helped me to see this object as more, as a symbol. They had turned

the carousel, wanted to hear the music, see the movement, they brought it to life and

awakened for me a meaning in the image.

A young boy who started sandplay at 12 years of age, had been physically abused by his

father, who himself was an abuse victim. The mother of the boy found herself torn between

her son and her husband. The boy spent most of his time outdoors and away from home. Her

splitting of emotions was echoed in that of the boy who would express his wanting to re-

engage with father, yet his fear of more violence. The family had been torn apart. Father

moved out temporarily.

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In the above photo the carousel is placed in the top quadrant, a circle within another sand

circle. The carousel an integral part of the mandalalike sand picture, a circle within a square.

Bridging underneath and between the carousel and the male and female figures, lies a white

skeleton. This scene could indicate the child’s experience of death of the Anima, the psychic

personification of the feminine principle. Could the connection via the white skeleton signify

a wounded child ego?

In this scene, we see the child has used elements in the burning tree; fire, the sail boat; wind,

sea; water, lion and kookaburra as wisdom and the carousel represents the vessel in which the

alchemical process comes alive. Here is the rounding of the square. It is as though he has

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taken all the elements and by placing the carousel into the sandtray he is experiencing his

own alchemy. The transcendent function comes alive within the mandala and the elemental

quadrants. In this scene, using the carousel as mandala he is exploring psychic disorientation

and reorientation to meaningfully transform chaos (Weinrib, 2004, p. 211).

Carousel as Sandplay Piece

My carousel piece found in the second-hand shop as depicted is wooden with 4 horses, 2 red,

2 white, the carousel decorated with points of gold. The alchemical colours serve an as

amplification of the crucible. Transformation into the collective unconscious is through the

ritualistic alchemical equation or elixir of life. My transcendent function occurred in a

ritualist manner mirrored perhaps by thousands of years, and an ancestral root in Hungarian

culture steeped in shamanic beliefs to awaken the awareness of the philosopher’s stone. My

carousel had turned me inward, it was here I found a new-found solace with Self, where I

discovered, as Jung called it “divided personalities”.

My experience of breaking away from mother left a residue of a psychic splitting, an inner

psychic state which left me with an unconscious identity. To make sense of this perhaps this

is time to describe the psychological states of my mother and grandmother, and the finds

within the I Ching and Eastern Astrology, which align to my Hungarian Ancestry and the all-

encompassing Tengri.

My maternal grandmother was diagnosed with late onset schizophrenia at age 40. My

memory of her was of an old woman who seemed far away and distant, yet loving and kind.

She of course was heavily medicated, this was in the late 1960’- 70’s. My own mother had to

endure a childhood being raised in a very isolated region of Australia, in a dysfunctional

family with a very sick mother, little outside intervention, no other community and few

family. My own mother suffered bad asthma, a symptom quite often found in children of

schizophrenics, she was a very sickly child. My experience of my mother is that she cannot

be trusted, she has her own undiagnosed personality disorder. In my own opinion (and that of

my late father) she possesses two distinct personalities, not unlike that of R.L Stevenson’s Dr

Jekyll and Mr Hyde (1886). This is the splitting of the inner psychic state, and just like Jekyll

& Hyde, she displays the physical signs of change when in the transition of disassociated

states, seen mostly on the expression on her face and a distinct change in her eyes, the

window to the soul.

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My own experience of division was one I knew well, one I adopted. I became a loner, I didn’t

communicate often and within me I carried around an emotional merry-go-round. In the

teachings of the Tengri it says; All humans are weak, and there should be tolerance for

shortcomings. No one is perfect. Was this the ancient wisdom of my ancestors that I needed

to learn as my own truth. I had suffered injury to the maternal image, the dual personality, the

splitting produces in children serious wounding to the archetypal image of the mother. Esther

Harding (1965) says “such children suffer in their conscious development, and in the

unconscious the image of parent they encounter is of a negative and destructive mother…in

such cases there is no chance of a real cure unless the injured archetypal image can itself be

reconstructed (Weinrib, 2004, p. 36)

On the one hand, my Hungarian ancestors had lead me into a new world of conscious reality,

on the other my Mother’s side lead me into the dark world of insanity, a tension of the

opposites. My life would consist of the reconstructing of the mother image, the guilt I lived as

a child unknowingly is represented by Erik Erickson’s psychosocial stages of development

other unmet stages introduced inferiority, I had not developed a sense of industry, and my

only focus was on the complex environment in which I existed and so began my world of

inadequacy, mistrust and complexes (Corey, 2009).

My awakening had occurred in a rush, consequently my introversion was expanded, I turned

and I walked within as a result of this enormity of awareness. The wounded child ego was

unable to cope, the imperfections of the world were mine to bare, I was alone, a loner and I

felt different “to feel very different from others, and this feeling of being unique brings a

certain sadness that is part of the loneliness of many youngsters…the evil within oneself as

well as outside, become conscious problems: the child must try to cope with urgent inner

impulses as well as the demands of the outer world” (Jung C. , Man and His Symbols, 1964,

p. 168). My focus became my internal dialogue with my dualistic Self.

Symbols as Elements in the Mandala

The mandala is a template for the mind, a state of peace and order, a resolution of the chaos

within. In Jung’s words, "The severe pattern imposed by a circular image of this kind

compensates the disorder and confusion of the psychic state—namely, through the

construction of a central point to which everything is related." (Jung C. , Man and His

Symbols, 1964). The carousel moves in an anti- clockwise motion descending towards the

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unconscious. Visually I am reminded of the mandala or a maze, the circle, at its centre the

nipple of a nurturing mother. A nipple that I never experienced, a suckling that is foreign to

my body and soul. Did my carousel recreate the ouroboric birth? Was I born out of the white

horse, was my warrior soul released with the heart of the dragon, to form my mandala. For

me the astrological sun in Scorpio, there seemed to be many elements that needed to be in

alignment to ignite the transcendent function.

The complete mandala holds all the factors responsible for the change in a person’s attitude

that results when the opposites can be held in balance. In balance perspective is clearer, and

allows the person to see things in a new and more integrated way, the essence of the pattern

of the mandala, the "squaring of the circle," my mandala the circular vessel of the carousel,

squared by the 4 horses. The quaternary of symbols amounting to the totality of Self. Self

being the source of energy. My infantile world had come to an end, the fire energy ensured

conflict and drama to proceed, resulting in the ensuing drama, the libido took on the contrast

of an inactive nature and conflicts developed. A part of me had died, I had no fear of death,

re-born I became a part of the ‘little battle’ and with this I took up arms, mounted my white

horse and armed with my sword of protection I rode forth.

As is known from our ancient past, humans and circles have had a close relationship. Within

a sacred circle, rituals, ceremonies and healing have been performed. Chanting, music, sound

and voice often an integrative part of this ritual. The circle could be a symbol drawn in the

sand, stones set into the earth, a natural fairy ring or ring of cedars or a circle formed by

humans. This basic symbol can represent wholeness, the sun as an image of perfection and

transformation. To enter the carousel mandala meant that my steps towards wholeness and

transcendence had begun. The spiral, the sacred geometry, the tree of life existed within me,

yet also without. Within the crucible, the merry-go-round, the alchemical change occurred,

“the alchemist projected what I have called the process of individuation into the phenomena

of the chemical change” (Jung C., Man and His Symbols, 1964).

In normal development, the Self of the child, the centre of their psychic totality, separates

itself from the Self of mother, then the child experiences more security from mother through

her nurturing, hugs, smiles, this opens the relationship to unconditional trust. The next phases

around 3 years of age see’s the centre of self-stabilized in the unconscious and it is in this

phase a child will begin to manifest itself in symbols of wholeness. The ancient symbolic

language of wholeness of Self can be represented by the circle or mandala (Kalff, 2003, p. 2).

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Personal Connection

At 7 years of age I experienced the Ouroboros –the carousel as the womb, the circular symbol

of perfection, infinity or wholeness. In the age-old image of the Ouroboros lies the thought of

devouring oneself and turning oneself into a circulatory process. The Ouroboros is a symbol

for the integration and assimilation of the opposite, for me it became my access to the shadow

world. This 'feed-back' process is at the same time a symbol of immortality, since it is said of

the Ouroboros that he slays himself and brings himself to life, fertilizes himself and gives

birth to himself. He symbolizes the ‘One’, who proceeds from the clash of opposites, and he

therefore constitutes the secret of the prima materia which stems from man's unconscious

(Neumann, 1973).

I was now experiencing a new birth, a break away from Great Mother, riding on the carousel

traversing the psychic experience. I experienced paradise at the carnival, but riding the vessel

of Great Mother I was plunged into the trance of a shamanic journey that my ancestors had

performed in their own ritualistic way, as I was doing now. Moving deeper into the

unconscious I felt myself splitting, separating, every spin of the merry-go-round, every

glance of my mother lead to further differentiation, we were being unravelled from each

other’s intertwinement.

I experienced with each turn for the first time a conscious thought of separation, I found

myself having an internal dialogue of a kind never before, I was looking down at this woman

‘Mother’, who was not looking back, she was not aware of my new presence of thought, this

made me angry, at this moment I loathed her and I wanted complete separation. At that

moment, I knew I was completely alone in the world, separate, yet a part of something else,

this sent me into a natural depression or perhaps I experienced trauma or “shock”. I was,

however held within the grips of a Temenos, the carousel. I did not know my quest to protect

the priestess who held the ‘power of the ring’, would mean a life time of searching for

meaning.

Each time the carousel went around I remember thinking as I looked down at ‘her’, “why is

she not looking at me, why does she not do as the other mothers and give me her full

attention. I remember holding on tight to my white horse as we whirled around and around

and up and down. I was dizzy with the movement with the realisation with my sense of

helplessness, as my little hands held tightly, the only control I had was to hold tight, sit and

17

not fall off. This I remember took all my physical strength. It was as if I had gone into a ‘little

battle’ indeed.

I remember also, the loud music coming from the centre of the merry-go-round, loud and

deafening; as if it wanted to sound out my screams, but I did not scream. Each time we

passed mother, I would then turn to look at the centre mirror, the central pole, looking at this

child, this child who I now understood possessed a Self. The central pole mirrors were made

up of many parts that intricately fitted together, was this a metaphor for whom I really was,

many parts to a whole, and my new realisation was to find the parts of me that fitted together

to form the image of the whole Self, “by entering the innermost point within the psyche by

which everything is arranged” (Iaccino, 1998, p. 56). For now, though the glimpses I caught

of me in the mirrors were chaotic, distorted and confounded by other images, my horse, the

other riders, children, parents, movement outside of my ride. The bringing together of the

elements for the alchemy I had discovered a new reality, this was where I belonged, my

world was no longer as it had been, nothing was as it had previously appeared.

As a sensitive feeling type was it my calling, my logos to experience transcendence in the

spiritual, to engage with the serpent to feel its sting in a paralysing blindness, the innate

duality a vivid ability to feel the tension of the opposites. Cast off in a mental state where I

experienced the divine reasoning, to enter solitude, to ignite the sacred fire and to stay within

the dark confines, to hibernate and wait. My winters of quiet content lasted an eternity, before

the fire ignited and sparked within me a desire to step out.

No longer paralysed in fear nor blinded by ignorance; I will always be eternally grateful to

the logos to the divine suffering I now recognise in others, by their look in their eyes, by the

actions they take and by the archetypal pieces placed in the sand tray. As a therapist, I am

able to walk beside them, show empathy for a journey that is long and arduous, filled with

pain, suffering tremor and fear. Where projection, my own and others can be felt as poison

arrows shooting towards the heart. The ‘little battle’ within can lead a warrior towards or

away from danger, into the fires of hell only to find the solace sitting at the very same fire

burning in a solitary glow of warmth. “The primordial fire that conquers every necessity shall

burn again, since the night of the world is wide and cold and the need is great, the well

protected fire brings together those from afar and those who are cold, those who do not see

another and cannot reach another, and it conquers suffering and shatters need” (Jung C., The

Red Book Liber Novus a Reader’s Edition, 2009, pp. 286, OB 42).

18

With my new-found sense of Self, I was unable to reconcile with a part of my self-axis the

ego development remained split for many years. Encouraged by a mother who only knew a

split world a world of black and white. Her ‘unus mundus’ was a dangerous mix, past on in

turn by her own mother’s experience of the world. A world where schizophrenia, depression

and insanity polarized psyche and matter. Tengri says that there are many diverse spirits

among us, good and bad. They can reside in the heavens, the underworld, or as spirits of the

land. They can harm people (Tengrism, 2016). This was my experience, my environment, my

new world; would I be open to harm. The innocent child was protected from this awareness,

the changed child was not.

All my senses reacted to a real phenomenon, the carousel ride, with its sights and sounds “we

are a psychic process which we do not control, or only partly direct” (Jung, Man and His

Symbols, 1964, p. 4). Before writing this paper, I had forgotten my carousel ride, my

beginning of individuation and the point of centralisation, the beginning of my story. “The

story of a life begins somewhere, at some particular point we happen to remember” (Jung,

Man and His Symbols, 1964, p. 4). It seemed an eternity had passed when I felt the carousel

slowing down, the movement slowing in unison with the up and down motion, it felt at that

moment time itself had slowed. As we stopped so did the music; the end was abrupt. I

struggled to dismantle. I was alone with my struggle, no one came to help, no one noticed. I

heard all the happy families, I heard their cries of joy, their pleas to do it again. But my mind

was set on how to descend, how to manoeuvre leg, then other leg, loosen my grip finger by

finger. The carousel floor appeared to be a long way down. I didn’t want to fall, but I knew at

that moment I had to do it all by myself, she did not come, I was alone, I knew this now.

As we walked away I turned to take one more look at the carousel, my white horse, my brave

journey. I saw bright lights, shining, gold, like I had been in a box of treasure. I had come out

of this box a different person than when I went in, a true alchemical experience had

manifested. Was this my first experience of the transcendent function, was my individuation

process brought on by some mechanisms of the carousel, resonating and speaking to a part of

my unconscious, awakening the psyche, arousing a part of me that had previously slept. I was

awoken by the loud music, the deafening music, did I need the volume to be turned to high.

Did I need to be shaken into motion by the spinning the up and down motion like a

centrifuge. My entire soul was being alerted to the awakening of Self, of transformation. Was

my carousel my free and protected space, my Temenos. Was my white horse the instinctual

19

drive that helped to set in motion all that I experienced on that day in that point in time. Was

my still point reached within the movement of all the parts of the carousel on that day?

20

Rider on White Horse – Symbol Paper

Fiona Werle

The Horse (Equus ferus caballus) is one of two extant subspecies of Equus ferus. It is an odd-

toed ungulate mammal belonging to the taxonomic family Equidae. The horse has evolved

over the past 45 to 55 million years from a small multi-toed creature, Eohippus, into the

large, single-toed animal of today. Humans began to domesticate horses around 4000 BC, and

their domestication is believed to have been widespread by 3000 BC. Horses in the

subspecies caballus are domesticated, although some domesticated populations live in the

wild as feral or wild horses, in Australia we call them ‘brumbies’.

Horses have been used in warfare for most of recorded history, from which a wide variety of

riding and driving techniques developed, using different styles of equipment and methods of

control. The first archaeological evidence of horses used in warfare dates to between 4000

and 3000 BC and the use of horses in warfare was widespread by the end of the Bronze Age.

The earliest archaeological evidence for the domestication of the horse comes from sites in

Ukraine and Kazakhstan, dating to approximately 3500–4000 BC. By 3000 BC, the horse

was completely domesticated and by 2000 BC there was a sharp increase in the number of

horse bones found in human settlements in north western Europe, indicating the spread of

domesticated horses throughout the continent. The most recent, but most irrefutable evidence

of domestication comes from sites where horse remains were interred with chariots in graves

of the Sintashta and Petrovka cultures c. 2100 BC.

Today horses are trained to be ridden or driven in a variety of sporting competitions, like

show jumping, dressage, three-day eventing, competitive driving, endurance riding,

gymkhana, rodeos, and in the UK fox hunting. Horse shows, which have their origins in

medieval European fairs, are held around the world. They host a huge range of classes,

covering the mounted and harness disciplines, as well as "In-hand" classes where the horses

are led, rather than ridden, to be judged. The method of judging varies with the discipline, but

winning usually depends on style and ability of both horse and rider.

Sports such as polo use the horse as a partner for human competitor’s other examples include

jousting, in which the main goal is for one rider to unseat the other, and buzkashi, a team

game played throughout Central Asia, the aim being to capture a goat carcass while on

horseback. Therapeutic use, people of all ages with physical and mental disabilities can

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obtain beneficial results from association with horses. Therapeutic riding is used to mentally

and physically stimulate disabled persons and help them improve their lives through

improved balance and coordination, increased self-confidence, and a greater feeling of

freedom and independence

Horse products collected from living horses include mare's milk, used by people with large

horse herds, such as the Mongols, who let it ferment to produce kumis. Horse blood was once

used as food by the Mongols and other nomadic tribes, who found it a convenient source of

nutrition when traveling. The drug Premarin is a mixture of estrogens extracted from the

urine of pregnant mares (pregnant mares' urine), and was previously a widely-used drug for

hormone replacement therapy. The tail hair of horses can be used for making bows for string

instruments such as the violin, viola, cello, and double bass.

Horse meat has been used as food for humans and carnivorous animals throughout the ages.

Horses are herbivores with a digestive system adapted to a forage diet of grasses and other

plant material, consumed steadily throughout the day. They can consume approximately 2%

to 2.5% of their body weight in dry feed each day. The height of horses is often stated in units

of hands and inches: one hand is equal to 4 inches (101.6 mm).

Horses exhibit a diverse array of coat colours and distinctive markings. Often, a horse is

classified first by its coat colour, before breed or sex. Horses have a great sense of balance,

due partly to their ability to feel their footing and partly to highly developed proprioception—

the unconscious sense of where the body and limbs are. A horse's sense of touch is well

developed. The most sensitive areas are around the eyes, ears, and nose. Horses sense contact

as subtle as an insect landing anywhere on the body.

Horses are herd animals, with a clear hierarchy of rank, led by a dominant individual, usually

a mare. They are also social creatures that form companionship attachments to their own

species and to other animals, including humans. Horses excel at simple learning, but also use

more advanced cognitive abilities that involve categorization and concept learning. They can

learn using habituation, desensitization, classical conditioning, and operant conditioning, and

positive and negative reinforcement. Horses sleep both standing up and lying down.

In ancient Greece, the horse was worshipped and prized as a special possession being

associated with the Goddess Artemis, twin to Apollo. Rhiannon the goddess who rode upon a

great white horse covered in a garment of shining gold, also known in Celtic tradition as

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Epona the “Horse Goddess” (Storm, The Ultimate Encyclopedia of Mythology, 1999). Carl

G. Jung is quoted as having said the horse represents ‘the mother within us’ explaining that

the animal has a power understanding, intuition and magical side that is distinctive from

anything else in nature.

The ‘Horse Goddess’, also known as ‘Epona’ and ‘Rhiannon’ respectively, were worshipped

for protection during shamanic Celtic rituals associated with magical flights to realms

inaccessible to others by using the horse, in some countries the horse would be sacrificed for

the shaman in order that the flight to the ‘otherworld’s’ was possible. It is said that she rode

upon a white mount called the ‘White Mare’.

Carried down into the depths of the lake I met up with Morgan le Fay, the faery Goddess, her

powers gave her the ability to fly and shape shift (Geoffrey of Monmouth, 1150). I am

Morgan, as I ride my white horse, I am one with the collective unconscious of the great

Goddess Mother spirit. Emerged in this realm I shape shift to a parallel world, unconscious

though of this experience I return changed, aware that there is a shift, resonating from a deep

place within the psyche.

In the ancient domain of the archetypal land of the creator goddess and priestesses I was

initiated. With my white horse by my side, I kneel at the primordial waters where I am

captured in the womb of mother earth. The ‘Apsu’ the watery abyss that existed before the

beginning of time and which supported the earth, now spreads before me. The abundance and

the source of knowledge and wisdom merging with the salty blood in my veins connecting

with my ancestors in the quest to find Self.

The dualistic strength held within the sword, echoed in the image of Morgan Le Fay’s

paradoxical nature is reflected in her dual role as both healer and dark magician, she

represents the twins Hunor and Magor who make up the people of the Magyars, she is

Terrible Mother and Great Mother. Holding the sword, she is Penthesileia Amazonian Queen,

daughter of Ares, fighter and lover (Storm, The Ultimate Encyclopedia of Mythology, 1999).

23

Hermetic principles in alchemy are aimed to purify, mature and perfect certain objects. The

object, mother, intuition, life. Did I at once feel the terrifying reality of wholeness of Self,

was my alchemical transmutation hindered by a family trait of division, a splitting which on

that day altered my Self constellation. The regression and progression igniting in me the

“element of Fire, which represents the divine spark in humankind, the light and truth – it

signifies the god source presence” (Storm, The Ultimate Encyclopedia of Mythology, 1999,

p. 269). The innocent child was no more, a new child emerged from the murky waters of the

lake, she was being transformed, shape shifting from innocent child to ‘other’.

Carl Jung says “Individuation does not mean we are dealing with something known and

finally cleared up, on which there is no more to be said. It merely indicates, an as yet, obscure

field of research much in need of exploration: the centralising processes in the unconscious

that go to form the personality”. (Jung C. G., 1973, p. 564).

The Rider on a White Horse – 11. Then I saw heaven opened, and behold, a white horse! The

one sitting on it is called Faithful and True, and in righteousness he judges and makes war. 12

His eyes are like a flame of fire, and on his head, are many diadems, and he has a name

written that no one knows but himself. 13 He is clothed in a robe dipped in[a] blood, and the

name by which he is called is The Word of God. 14 And the armies of heaven, arrayed in fine

linen, white and pure, were following him on white horses. 15 From his mouth comes a sharp

24

sword with which to strike down the nations, and he will rule[b] them with a rod of iron. (The

Holy Bible, English Standard Version, 2001).

In Firdausi, time is often the symbol of fate. The Indian text says that the horse symbol

contains the whole world, his kinsman and cradle is the sea, the mother, who is the equivalent

of the world-soul. Just as Aion represents the libido in the “embrace” or state of death and

rebirth, so here the cradle of the horse is the sea, i.e., the libido is in the “mother”, dying and

rising again in the unconscious. The horse too is a “tree of death” the modern Persian word

for coffin means ‘wooden horse’. The horse also plays the part of a psychopomp who leads

the way to the other world – the souls of the dead are fetched by horsewomen, the Valkyries

(Jung C. G., 1973, p. 1781).

In the above sand picture from our 12-year-old boy we see the white horse has broken free

from the carousel and finds safety within the ouroboric circle. Nurtured through the extended

love of grandparents and by Great Mother. The young horse watches on as Terrible Mother,

as an attacking spider stands at the edge of the circle. Father had come back into the family

home and mother had chosen to support him. Father as Darth Vader reaching out for the

black sword.

The horse is the symbol of instinctual knowledge, it is closely connected with man and his

relationship with rider. In fairy tales, the horse leads the lost prince home (Kalff, 2003).

25

Could it be that the young boy has been guided towards a more nurturing home, he talked

here of his fond memories of his grandparents and how he missed the days when they were

alive.

In Neumann’s archetypal stages in evolutionary development the symbolism would be

reminiscent of the ‘slaying of mother dragon’. Strengthening of the ego, the ‘little battle’, the

boy as prince, helps him to find the courage to face the terrible mother. “In slaying the

terrible mother, the benevolent mother is released” (Neumann, 1973). The young horse looks

terrible mother in the eye, thus, constellating an archetypal consciousness. The ancient Great

Mother was a dangerously dual figure, both benevolent and terrifying, like the Hindu goddess

Kali. This is the mother the boy has now come to recognise.

This boy was now entering his 13th year, many areas of his life were affected by mis-trust,

guilt and shame “the ego feels hampered in its will or its desire and usually projects the

obstruction onto something external”, (Jung, Man and His Symbols, 1964, p. 169). He was

disruptive in school, bullied at home and at school, he was losing friends and spent much

time alone.

Although the horse is a symbol of many layers, what we see is that this horse is young, his

instincts not yet sharpened or honed by experience. Although horses symbolise psychic

energies because of their fast gait and their intensity, known as ‘horsepower” (Kalff, 2003),

we could say of our pony that he has not yet acquired the abilities, that his strengths of

endurance are a metaphor for the emerging development, psychosocially, emotionally and

psychically. Unconsciously perhaps this child is exploring his options; “One seeking

something that is impossible to find, or about which nothing is known – there is only one

thing that seems to work; to turn directly towards the approaching darkness without prejudice

and totally naively, and try to find out what its secret aim is and what it wants from you”

(Jung, Man and His Symbols, 1964, p. 170) .

In this last picture, it also signified his last visit to me, upon reflection of his sand picture I

understand that throughout his therapeutic sessions this sand picture has come to represent

the psyches inherent ability to heal itself. Given the free and protected space, in this instance

the Temenos of my therapeutic room, this child has been able to explore the development of

the psyche’s forces through the placement of the pieces in the sand. I can only hope that this

child was given enough psychic influence to have realised ego-development hindered by the

‘primal relationship’ of mother and son.

26

Connecting the Elements

In the Japanese Nine Star Ki, the astrological interpretation of my numbers give an

interesting snapshot into what can only be viewed as a life’s purpose and meaning. My year

number is 9, Yin; Fire, birth number 6, Li. I Ching - Li (The clinging, fire). Exploring the I

Ching or Book of changes, it appears there may be more at play, that somehow my life, my

movements, my psychology was tied to an invisible set of rules, to be followed and

acknowledged on a soul or spirit level.

Children in house 9 Yin Fire Li - this gives the person qualities where they “have difficulty

breaking from their dependency and childhood patterns – this particular configuration – is as

if the child does not have enough inner strength to move out of the house” (Sachs, 1999, p.

213). Adult transformation controls the child – “the person exhibits a tremendous amount of

self-control. Like super ego, the adult natal transformation acts as a reminder to the child

natal transformation of a higher order of things – a different independent perspective. This

may curb impulsiveness but it can also result in a person overlooking or considering as

unimportant, many childhood nurturing needs. Thus, they may be highly self-repressive and

are often loners. Two opposing tendencies could arise – total compliance or total defiance

(Sachs, 1999, p. 229).

This duality I know well, but was that moment of disassociation, of splitting or division

activated because of the inherit traits or was this process towards individuation activating the

tension of the opposites, thus triggering an archaic preconscious activation. Can a carousel

and a white horse as a symbolic experience, a dream and a Nine Star Ki natal chart supported

by the I Ching come to the same conclusions?

The hexagram of the I Ching Li, the Clinging, Fire is a double sign. The trigram Li means “to

cling to something, to be conditioned, to depend or rest on something and brightness”. A dark

line clings to two light lines, one above and one below – the image of an empty space

between two strong lines, whereby the two strong lines are made ‘bright’. The trigram

represents the middle daughter (I am the middle daughter). The Creative has incorporated the

central line of the ‘Receptive’, and thus Li develops. As an image, it is fire which has no

definite form but clings to the burning object and thus is ‘bright’ (Wilhelm, 1950).

Upon reading the ancients texts of the alchemical processes it describes the above so potently

it is uncanny. All the elements are needed for the alchemical equation, but fire is the

fundamental element that ignites the alchemy.

27

The white horse is often considered clairaudient and clairvoyant, a leader of lost souls, or

psychopomp (Kalff, 2003). A psychopomp is a guide, whose primary function is to escort

souls to the afterlife, but they can also serve as guides through the various transitions of life. I

did not know then, but later as an adult I would perform the ritualistic act of a psychopomp

by helping the deceased find their way. This deceased person was my father. This is another

story, another layer, another time.

When a white horse enters the sand picture I am conscious of Dora Kalff’s insight into the

meaning behind the symbol. Is this horse free, unbound by gates, fences or boundaries or is it

contained? I look at the colour of the horses, their gait, their positioning within the sand tray,

are they horses with riders, or are they wild brumbies running free. Is the horse a young foal,

like that of our 12-year-old boy who stares the terrible mother in the eye. Who do the horses

choose as their companions, is it humans or other animals, I watch as small children

manoeuver their horse in symbolic play.

As Dora Kalff did before me, I try to give the children with weak or neurotic ego

development the possibility of constellating and manifesting in therapy, my role as I

understand it is through transference, to try to protect and stabilize the relationship between

Self and the ego, this is done in the free and protected space I offer within my therapeutic

setting. I lend myself to the child, so that they are not alone, there expression is then free to

explore even if this means needing to gain the confidence to establish trust and which point

they can explore and restore the mother child unity. In my personal role, I embrace the

intellectual and the spiritual aspects of each child as they transcend the stages, being held

within the boundary of the protected space (Kalff, 2003). Within this safe haven,

transformation of psychic energy can occur and each individual walks their own path as I

bare witness.

The dragon with the knot, the heart of Scorpio, riding the white horse, the movement, music,

are all these elements obtained by breaking away on my white horse, was this my psyche

pulling all the elements towards a re-birth, regressing back to the ancient womb into the

sacred land where I was transformed by the ‘Feminine Christ’, whose threads surround me

like a golden cloak worn by the shamanic priestess who’s moons illumination drives the

movement of a transgression towards transcendence

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Mongolian Symbol – Dragon with Knot, Heart of Scorpio Warrior riding White Horse into Battle

Ritualistic mandalas from specific cultures display a style and variety of elements with

special significance to that culture. There are nearly as many types of mandalas as there have

been societies in the history of Humankind. But the essence of the pattern of the mandala, the

"squaring of the circle," (Jung C. , Man and His Symbols, 1964) is a basic motif in the

architecture of so many dreams and fantasies whose unifying similarities stretch across the

ages. The quaternary pattern imposed upon the circle symbolizes the application of an orderly

architecture upon the infinity of the cosmos. It gives the psyche a safe place on which to

stand, a solid foundation upon which it can gather itself to achieve completeness and

harmony.

Furthermore, the central point, is the reference point for the self to identify with. Jung refers

to this pattern as the "archetype of wholeness." Was my central point the nipple of mother,

the distorted mirrors or the great white horse upon which I rode.

29

A Dream

Around this time, I stated dreaming that I could fly. I would fly from tree to tree, always the

same place, the same trees. I remember the sense of lightness and control I experienced. Jung

says “our dream life creates a meandering pattern in which individual strands of tendencies

become visible, then vanish, then return again – over a long period of time, one can observe a

sort of hidden regulating or directing tendency at work, creating a slow, imperceptible

process of psychic growth – the process of individuation” (Jung, Man and His Symbols,

1964, p. 161).

If my dream is the first approach to the unconscious and is characterised by a state of gradual

awakening, what does it mean to fly. Was this the awakening of Morgan, was the child on the

white horse merely experiencing a possibility that of taking flight, galloping away, towards

and away from progression to regression. Galloping towards the ‘another world’.

Horse and Rider

The white horse as the nucleus of the carousel, the circular fortress, and a child who, such as

I, was in the midst of ego consciousness and self-development. I was searching for meaning

within my fortress, I was enamoured, alert to a “little battle” sparked within me. Was I

Morgan, at the lakes side seeking magical and healing powers to aid transformation. The

alchemical colours, sounds and symbols transpired the wholeness process, I at the centre of

the ride the “nucleus”, Jung says “from this central nucleus the whole building up of the ego

consciousness is directed, the ego being a duplicate or structural counterpart of the original

centre”, (Jung, Man and His Symbols, 1964, p. 169).

In my outer world, there was chaos, within my search for meaning I was gripped by inherited

traits, matriarchal patterns, I was disturbed, my instinctive drive was towards introspection

and introversion, this is where my white horse had lead me. Jung talks of “the individuation

process of coming to terms with ones’ own centre of Self as generally beginning with a

wounding of the personality, as an initial shock which leads to a sort of call”, (Jung, Man and

His Symbols, 1964, p. 169).

I called the white horse; who took her rider to another realm the beginning of the awakening

to the instinctual world. In my state of transcendence, I found myself in the circle vortex,

spinning round and round in a perfect symmetry of sacred geometry, Jung said “from the

30

expression of god or Source, Heaven, Sun, Soul the Ideal human is manifested or born”

(Kalff, 2003, p. 2). On that day, it prepared and strengthened me, the rider for ‘actual combat’

“as they wielded their swords at the mock enemies”. I realised a trigger to psychic

development, carried along on my white horse, I was being readied for a lifetime of “little

battles”.

31

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