Lost with Youby nekoppi

It's KaiLu Version of Kuroshitsuji / Black Butler

Chapter 1

This is the darkest era in London, where the sky was grey, covered from the smoke from the new built factories. The silhouette of the city was all black, not giving any single appeal to our sight. But the story isn’t about the city itself. It took place far in the middle of the lone

sea, where there’s a small boat with two figures sitting by each side.

“Don’t blame me.” A man with black butler suit and black hair smirked at the little boy who sat across him, “you’re the one who want to join this journey,” his creepy smile turned into grin when the boy looked away, refused to show an embarrassed face. But the butler knew

the gesture very well, everytime this boy felt insecure, he will put his hands across his chest and his pink lips pouted in his own, noble way.

What a cute being.

“I don't know we'll be lost in this sea.” The boy with brownish hair grumbled lowly. It has been days since he ordered the butler to search the missing jewelry. It's the precious Phantomhive family ring, and he lost it when they escaped from the attack of Phoenix

Community. That's why he sailed on this small and useless boat, floating around the cold, lone sea with a hungry stomach. The ring was his everything, without it, he will be just

someone without title and just become a little boy named Luhan.

The handsome butler titled his head, giving his master an annoying smile like he used too, knowing that the boy was close to hunger deprivation yet he did nothing to make this boy comfortable at all. He’s kinda a sadistic person, actually, and he loved to play game with

Luhan, cause it’s boring if he just became a good and perfect butler. “It’s still not my fault, master, if I don’t bring any human food for you, cause I don’t need any.” His voice lowered,

turning into a husky whisper as he said more, “although... my food is here.” He stared at Luhan with a glint of fire in his eyes.

Luhan stared back at him, and maybe what made the devilish butler fascinated with this little boy was how beautiful those dark blue eyes, staring at him bravely even after knew who he was and what he capable of doing. Maybe this is why he choose this boy to be his

master. The endless darkness and the cruelty behind his eyes portraying his corrupted soul. This boy saw too much and suffered enough that there’s no mercy in him anymore.

“So you planned to make me near my death, until I beg to be eaten...” it’s a silly conclusion that even the butler didn’t think of it that way. It’s true he wanted Luhan to beg, but it’s for

a life not a death.

“Young Master,” the butler said calmly, “sure it was very tempting but it’s not the time, yet.” He was too excited with this boy antics he can feel shiver on his own skin, “Even i want to, I won’t take advantage of you, instead.” He moved closer and took the skinny hand into his mouth, “at a time like this, I think you should order something from me, before your thirst

drying over your beautiful lips.”

“But I don’t want to.” Luhan sighed. It was a surprise to the butler cause usually this boy always ordering him around like a dog. He didn’t complain about it, cause every order

strengthen the bonds in between them and stained the boy’s soul even more. Now, the boy only stared at him with his usual empty gaze, “truthfully, I don’t want to rely on you too

much. I was thinking about it before. I’m a noble. I shouldn’t be so useless like this.”

It’s weird.

Master should rely on their servant. Master supposed to ordering his servants to do the dirty job for them. They had the pride not in themselves but in their well-trained servants. There’s

no place to feel guilty, nor pity. It’s all weakened the darkness in a soul and if his master keep let emotion win over his arrogance, there’s no sin left in him and there’ll be no soul to

be eaten.

“But you have me,” the butler touched luhan’s jaw, lifting it up gently until their face became so close, they can feel each other breath, “Don’t you remember, I was your hands and knees, I was here because you called me, you wants me. Then it must be ridiculous, if

you try not to rely on me, right?”

The butler can hear it, the little sound of a stomach growling and he can’t help but chuckled cause he knew it was soon, until he can hear this soft, alluring voice calling his name.

“Kai...”

Luhan whispered the name given to the butler.

“Yes, My Lord?” Kai giving his best smile, didn’t cover his excitement at hearing how simple his name escaped those small, pink lips yet it feels like a tasty honey pouring down into his

throat.

He waited for Luhan to order him for food but the boy keep staring at him, before a smile tugging on the boy lips,

“Just like I thought.”

The boy raised his small hands and cupped Kai’s face, making the butler widened his eyes cause it's the first time he saw his master put a real smile. It has been years since they were together and Luhan managed to put on a stoic face all the time. But today, the boy smiled

heavenly and suddenly Kai can feel it on his skin. As the warm body pressed to his lifeless container, let the sound of the precious heart beat vibrating all over his skin.

“I really like you, Kai.” Luhan giggled, or more likely laughing breathlessly cause there’s so little energy left in him, “somehow I was thinking if I’m not enough. This soul,” he touch his

own chest, “I’m afraid if the time comes my soul won’t satisfy your hunger, that’s why seeing into your panicked eyes when I said I won’t order you around, make me feel so

happy.”

Kai cursed under his breath. This little brat, he said mentally, Kai forgot that behind the flawless beauty, Luhan was an evil genius who loved to play with people’s mind.

However, the way he resigned his fate into Kai’s hand and didn’t even try to fight off to set his soul free, it made the butler drooling over him even more.

“You’re such a strange person.” Kai said, “human didn’t just resign in their fate. That’s why they became such interesting being, especially when they tried to run from their promise.” He leaned down and kissed the patch on Luhan’s left eye, where the contract been placed.

“I’m not anyone.” Luhan closed his eyes, “and I’m not scared with the death.”

“Why?” Kai tried not to open the patch, to see the contract and just make sure this boy still his and his only.

“It kinda calm me down, knowing that I’m yours already,” again the butler stoned at hearing unfamiliar words escaped from his master lips. “In fact,” Luhan smiled in joy, “I can’t wait

until you really eating me and make me part of your body.”

What kind of human is this? Kai stared at Luhan in shock. For thousands years he wandered around this world, he never met this kind of person before. He used to be a creature which

created from desire, and live to satisfy his hunger and thirst. He didn’t feel, and so he didn’t care. He shouldn’t summoned a glass of milk and give it to Luhan without an order. He shouldn’t be so satisfied to see how thankful the boy when the milk healing the thirst.

“Thank you, Kai.” Luhan sighing in relief, “now, can I give you something in return, for your kindness?”

Kindness? Who? All Kai did was summoning a glass of milk. How could it be counted as kindness?

“How about,” Luhan opened his patch and let Kai saw the contract, somehow glowing and alluring, “I order you to taste my soul.”

And just like a machine, when this devil butler received his order, all he did was bow and whispered darkly,

“Yes, My Lord.”

.

Luhan blinked.

He stared at the decorated ceiling in confusion as he was laying the middle of the four poster bed of Phantomhive Mansion. he covered his face with the back of his hand, gasping

as he remember what happen in the lone sea, including the memory of his black haired butler and the hunger.

There’s more, but his memory stopped abruptly when he heard the door opened, revealing Kai who walked inside with that annoying happy yet fake smile all over his face, “glad to see you wake up by yourself, Young Master.” He said in a mocking tone, making Luhan wanted to dig a hole and just hide forever because of embarrassment. But then he remind himself,

he’s a noble. He shouldn’t be chickened out just because he lost his virginity.

“I guess you can’t walk?” Just when Luhan finally calmed his heart beat, the stupid butler give him another attack. The man walked passed by his bed and began opening the heavy

curtain to let the sun light warmed the room.

Luhan averted his gaze from the light, said nothing cause he didn’t know what to say and he didn’t want to look stupid by saying nonsense.

“My ring...” he murmured to himself, when he saw his precious ring placed neatly on the bedside table. For a while, he felt at ease, for whatever reason the ring was back and he can

stop worrying over his status.

“Master...” Luhan turned at Kai who now standing near his bed while bowing politely, “I want to thank you.” He said huskily, “although it seemed I became so rude by taking advantage

of you, yesterday.”

Luhan felt his throat became dry. Stop reminding me of that, he mentally snarled.

“Umm...” He played with his ring, so he didn’t have to think about Kai or looking at his direction.

“But still...” Kai titled his face, playing innocent, “after all, it’s your order, Master. I can’t refuse your order.”

Just stop it! Luhan snapped, still mentally, as he shot a deatly glare at his butler. Sure this devil loved to taunt him, daring him to retort back his challenge. Cause they both know what

had happen and what they enjoyed the most from each other.

“I know.” Luhan grabbed his ring tightly, just to hold himself from exploding. No, it’s not anger building in him but it’s another series of a sinful and forbidden desire, “don’t talk

about it again.” He said lowly.

“Yes, My Lord.” Kai chuckled, and Luhan took a deep breath in relief cause this discussion was ended here.

Sadly, the butler didn’t think the same.

“If I may ask you, Young Master,” Kai stared right into his eyes, the usual pearly black eyes now getting contamined with the bloody red, “I wonder, if there will be a next time?”

And that’s all he need, to make Luhan lost his sanity.

*

Chapter 2

“So it’s the time…”

Luhan said breathlessly as he laid on the dirty pavement, blood choked out from his wound and his small mouth. His eyes blinked at the rain, now that he tasted the real victory, aside feeling the joy there was only numbness in him. However, he didn’t regret to sign a contract with the devil. Even when his life was a big mess, his pride didn’t allow him to submit under the greater power to take him to where he belongs. He needed to fight back, he needed to keep alive, to track down the mastermind behind the slaughter of his family and his own

self.

He didn't mind to put stain on his very dear soul, or became the tasty meal for this dark being, as long as he got his revenge.

“Yes, it’s the time.”

Luhan eyes met the pearly black ones, with the glint of red shimmering through them. Kai was smiling and Luhan can’t help but feeling warm at the simple companion he had in this lone, cemetery land. He opened his mouth to retort with sarcasm but his eyes found the

dripping blood from the wound on Kai’s arm, “Kai, your hand.” He tried to get up, he tried to reach Kai with his trembled hand, “you lost your hand….” He didn’t realize that he was

spilling the tears out but the noble boy cried as he touched the end of the bleeding flesh and let his temple tugged to Kai’s arm, “Kai, you lost your hand.”

“I’m okay, so just stop crying over me now.” Kai said in the gentle murmurs Luhan often mistaken as a fake hospitality. He used to think Kai will never took any pity towards him,

hence feel anything at all aside thinking of him as someone who had contract with and will be a meal when the contract fulfilled.

It’s weird, when Kai supposed to stop pretending to be nice and stop playing in the perfect butler mask, the brunette lifted Luhan’s face and licked the track of tears away.

“I only want to see your fear.”

Luhan closed his eyes and the boy smiled weakly. What a joke, he thought, as he coughed another gulp of blood, before he laughed. He laughed as hard as he could, making the butler

stared at him in daze.

“What’s so funny?” Kai asked.

Luhan chuckled lightly at the devil,

“I love you, Kai.”

It’s hurt, to say every words out. It’s hurt cause he just realized it now, he just say it now when he had plenty of chances before. It didn’t matter if he died or if he was getting eaten and going into the world of nothingness. He loved Kai, he loved the devil which taunted him to the dark side, he loved this damned creature and no one can take this liberty from him.

Not the God, not the death, not the devil himself.

“You’re not supposed to love me, little one.” Kai whispered into his lips, “I’m going to eat your soul. You should fear me by now. There’s no heaven or hell, no afterlife for you aside

being inside of me, being the part of my sin.”

Luhan opened his eyes, let Kai saw into the clear-est, prettiest, deep blue orbs, “I’m not afraid of you.” the boy murmured softly as he pecked Kai’s lips and gasped in the warmness cause all he feel was cold, only an unbearably cold which made his body paralyzed and his

voice raw as he spoke for the last time,

“I know I’m only yours.”

.

‘I know I’m only yours.’

It’s like Luhan’s heart was the one who said so, as Kai stared at the boy who slowly turned lifeless in his arms. This wave of uncomfortable feeling suddenly filled the empty shell of his human container. He stunned, watching the boy drifted into the eternal sleep with a frown

and a clenched pain in his left chest, a heart throb when he was created heartless.

What’s happen?

Who allow this boy to confess and just left? This is his time, he will enjoy it when he played the death game and he will be the one who decide when will the soul leave the body

because the boy is his, and his only. Luhan can’t just leave him, not after make him feels. Luhan should be here, so the boy can watch how Kai devour him. Luhan had to be here so

Kai could hear the priceless scream, begging for a second chance.

But even the soul, for an absurd reason called ‘love’, purified and reborn into a glowing white light. Every sin marked under the devil’s contract had been dismissed and now, under

His mercy, there’s no reason for Kai to eat Luhan anymore.

The love was real.

He came up by the conclusion as he saw the white grain of lights covering Luhan, forming into a ball of luminous white. Splitting in between thick rain cloud, there's heaven light

shone through the body and with that, the soul turned into a beautiful white pearl. It made Kai reached in, his blood-covered hand touched the soft light and without warning, red tears

pouring down on his already wet cheeks.

So this is how it feels to say goodbye.

“No.”

He remembered the first time he met Luhan, blood was all over the boy, the body wasted, but from the hazy blue eyes, Kai saw through inside and shivered in bliss when the soul isn’t ready to give up. The body let itself getting inhumanly tortured but the soul was burned in

anger, promising punishment and revenge to every hand laid on him, to every drop of blood cut out of his skin. It made the devil falling in love, defeated by the preciousness and the

pure evilness in Luhan. That’s why he never regretted it to sign a contract with the boy and spend a few years taunting the soul, make it tastier so when today is come, he could enjoy

every bit of it.

“No!”

Kai grabbed the pearl, didn’t care if his palm burned at the touch. He stared at his own, horrible reflection on the surface of the jewel and with that he slammed the soul back into

Luhan.

“Stupid boy.” He gritted his teeth in annoyance, “Like I will let you leave me.”

*

Now back onto the boring sea where there’s a small boat in the middle of fog.

Luhan blinked in surprise. He didn’t expect to get awakened all over again, so he slowly sat up, staring down at his hands and then at his body in fascination. He touched his left chest. There’s no blood, no wound, nothing only the hole on his vest, but he thought he can’t help

with that. A dead person didn’t need good clothes, only a better trip to the endless world. He looked at the sea, at the freedom he shouldn’t deserve until his eyes found the familiar back in the other end of the boat. All of sudden, he felt a loud thump inside his chest and it made

him running his hand on his heart cause he knew for sure, a dead person isn’t beating.

“I’m still alive.” He murmured lowly, much to himself.

“Of course.” The dark figure turned at him. There’s no fake smile, only grunts escaped the brunette’s lips, “I’m not done with you.”

Why Luhan felt excited with that, the boy didn’t have idea, but since he was alive then it means the devil didn’t eat him yet. So Luhan scooted to close his gap with Kai and took a

liberty to sit near Kai’s back. The boy leaned his head onto Kai’s arm, smiling when he saw the cut arm already back on its place.

“I only eat half of your soul.”

Luhan smiled even wider at hearing such a strange statement and can’t stop himself from whispering a low, ‘and, why?’

“Cause you’re mine.” Kai hissed at him, but Luhan was pretty sure it’s not the anger which built in the devil’s eyes, “so you’re belongs to me, all of you.” the devil pushed him flat onto the boat and towering over his small body, “so be prepared, little one.” Luhan gulped as Kai

grabbed his vest and ripped it off him,

“You stuck with me, forever.”

There’s a silent moment in between them. Luhan assumed that Kai was expecting him to react, after the sudden outburst of the devil’s thought. But Luhan only stared at him, only

smiled in joy for the fact that even to this cruel being, he didn’t get defeated. He’s still alive, breathing, and for the utter most terror for anyone to hear, still deeply in love with Kai.

A devilish smirk appeared on his beautiful face, “so… Jongin…” he let the Devil’s real name went past his lips as he got up and cupped Kai’s face and asked.

“Is that mean, you love me too?”

Even by living with a half soul, he can win a devil’s heart.

*

The Black Present

*

*

Kyungsoo stared at the black present placed neatly on her writing desk. The young Lady titled her head in confusion, but when her maid said it’s from Luhan, her face suddenly

tinted in pink although then she scolded his fiancée for having such a bad taste and gave her such a depressing color for the present. ‘Kawai-kunai!’ that’s what she shouted to the

sky, and made her maid giggled and teased her for being blindly in love with the Phantomhive boy.

“Hmm, so curious…” Kyungsoo stared at the black box while untied the stripped white ribbon, “what kind of present he had for me?”

With a thumped heart, she opened the box. Suddenly, her eyes widened and her face turned pale as she saw what was inside.

“This is-…?!”

.

There’s a knock on the door. Tao yawned and saw Sehun, his servant opened his bedroom door with gloomy face. Although Sehun was always quiet and calm, the Indian Prince could

feel something was off today. So he sat up straight and asked Sehun what’s wrong the grey haired boy gave him the black present delivered by Luhan’s butler, “Your Highness, a while

ago Kai came to give this present to you.”

“From Luhan?!” Tao immediately rushed to get the present, “give it to me! give it to me!” he shouted cheerfully cause probably this is the only time Luhan saw him as worth as friend

and even going so far by giving him such a precious present.

“Ah I’m so curious what kind of present he got me. Is it a toy? No, Luhan was a brat so he might be set up a prank inside...” but as he opened box, he could only froze seeing the

content, even Sehun approached him and looked inside.

“What the…” his hand reached into the box.

.

In memory of

Luhan Phantomhive

Who died on 20 Apr 1889

AGED 13 Years

.

“Should I really need to say good bye?”

Kai smiled at the young boy in black suit who was brooding in the corner of carriage. He climbed in and sat across Luhan. His eyes shot an amusement glance towards the boy,

making Luhan hissed in annoyance, “What are you laughing at?”

Kai titled his head, “no, I’m just so happy.” He chuckled darkly while his blood-like red eyes daring Luhan with frightening promises of the future which Luhan wouldn’t want to imagine,

“finally my job as your butler ended.”

Luhan gulped. He was aware of that, too, now Kai wasn’t his butler, then he won’t have control over the demon anymore. He couldn’t order him around and Kai won’t need to obey anything he said. In fact, he was supposed to be dead, if not the demon took him under the

mercy and only ate half of his soul. Now he was alive and the butler was free from the contract, he afraid Kai won’t hesitate to torture him as payback.

Not that he expected to be tortured. So far, the closest thing he had as torture was wild and dirty sex which they’ve had since they were back from the island. Luhan didn’t even hate it,

he loved it as they did it on the boat, on the shore, in the forest behind Phantomhive Mansion, even this morning when Kai helped him dressed.

“It’s not like you’ll leave my side.” Luhan pouted.

“No I won’t.” Was Kai immediate reply, as the red eyes slowly contaminated by purple, and the smile turned into a devilish grin, “since you confess that you love me more than your

soul, I guess I will keep you as mine.”

Luhan wanted to answer that he’s not a possession and his noble blood itched to get mad at the insulting tone Kai’s had over him. but he remind himself, Luhan Phantomhive was

already dead, which means, he didn’t have big mansion to be called as home, didn’t have cute fiancée named Kyungsoo, didn’t have three idiots as his servants and… now he even

lost his perfect demonic butler.

Even the remain of his soul belongs to Kai.

He was nobody.

Nothing.

“Then what are you planning for me?” Luhan asked, “I can’t be yours forever.”

Kai sat back comfortably, with a sly smile decorating his face and Luhan wondered if the demon could read what’s occurring in his mind cause the next thing, the air around them distorted for a second, before everything turned normal, except for the view outside the carriage. Luhan’s eyes widened, as he saw the red dessert with smoking land and the

burning mountain as background instead trees and green lawn. He opened his mouth to ask but Kai was disappeared from in front of him and already sat so close, next to him.

“Jongin…”

And it’s not Kai anymore, who tucked his small body into an embrace and pecked his lips gently.

“Welcome to the hell, Luhan.”