WESTERN DAILY PRESS FRIDAY APRIL 6 2018 21WDP-E01-S2

oicesBe courageous toguarantee gettingthe message acrossThere is a method to avoidingmiscommunication, writes KarenO’Donnell

How sure are you that what youthink you are communicating isreaching the person you are talk-ing to?

Frequently we experience mis-communication where part of theinformation is lost or misunder-stood. We believe communicationhas occurred, but it hasn’t! Bothpeople think they understandwhat has been passed betweenthem, but the ideas they have arenot the same. This is where theillusion can be most damaging.

Have you ever been on the re-ceiving end of someone misinter-preting your words, or at a meet-ing with your colleagues only torealise afterwards that their inter-pretation of that meeting is verydif ferent?

Perhaps you sent an innocentemail or text and the recipienttook offence – their interpretationwas not your meaning.

What causes the problem?The words we hear and their

meanings are filtered through ourown unique context grid, which ismade up of our strongly-held opin-ions, beliefs and attitudes s h ap e dand reinforced over a lifetime.This results in us all unknowinglyputting our own interpretation orspin on the words of others, oftencreating misunderstanding andhurt feelings.

At work, when you are depend-ent on someone to get a task ac-complished, it is essential youbuild a relationship that will leadto open task-related communica-tion.

Conversations tend to bedefined by what we tell, ratherthan by what we ask. Yet all mycoaching experience has taughtme that what builds a relation-ship, solves problems and movessituations forward is asking theright questions.

We need to adopt the ABC ofCourageous Conversations; theart of enquiry:

Asking questions to which youmay not already know thea n swe rBuilding a relationship based oncuriosity and interest in theother person, and seeking…Clarification to understandwhat is being said.

An objective of every cour-ageous conversation is to enhancethe relationship – with a workcolleague, family member or

friend. With these we can connect,communicate and collaboratemore effectively at a deep level ofunderstanding.

Think about an importantperson in your life that you may beavoiding having ‘t h at ’ c o nve r s a -tion with. Remember, you and theother person use different contextfilter grids and working throughlikely assumptions that may havebeen made is essential to improv-ing our ability to handle conversa-t i o n s.

All courageous conversationsstart with self-enquiry, which fol-lows the ‘WOW ’ ap p ro a ch .

What happened: what actuallyhappened and how does thatmake you feel? Who else is itaf fecting?Own it: how might you havecontributed to this situation?Win-win it for you and the otherperson: when it’s resolved, whatpositive implication will it havefor you the other person andfamily or work?

Once you are clear on where youstand with this issue, is theresomeone you need to have a cour-ageous conversation with? Isthere anyone who can influencethe desired outcome? Before youstart, bear the following in mind.■ Tip 1: park your emotions on theshelf. Instead, come from a placeof curiosity.■ Tip 2: Have the end in sight.What is it you want to achieve?■ Tip 3: Be patient and listen.

Courageous conversations canenhance your working relation-ship. Making room for them candeepen that connection, commu-nication and collaboration.

Communication is vital in allaspects of work. When communic-ating, be crystal clear. Where it isappropriate, seek clarificationthat what you meant was actuallywhat was understood.

The skill of enquiry is necessaryto identify needs for collaborationamong work colleagues and de-partments and to facilitate suchc o l l ab o r at i o n .

Teams at work often consist of avariety of conflicting personalit-ies and styles. Getting to a pointwhere a team can collaborate andwork in harmony can take time.Teams can be transformed by act-ively encouraging courageousconversations and using the art ofe n q u i r y.

Karen O’Donnell is from Toastmasters International, a non-profit educational organisation that teaches publicspeaking and leadership skills; see toastmasters.org

Porter lives up toglowing reputation

Review

Good communication is vital in all aspects of work, says Karen O’Donnell, andit is important to be crystal clear and to seek clarification, if necessary

oicesVV“Sometimes I leave the stagethinking, ‘That was good for me,but was it good for them?’” beamsGregory Porter as he returns for afew more songs.

Gregory, let me speak on behalfof everyone in Colston Hall when Isay that it most definitely was.

But the performance doesn’t getoff to the smoothest of starts. Asthe Grammy winner departs thestage for the third time in theopening 15 minutes, people beginto murmur to each other withpuzzled expressions, questioningthe reasoning behind the repeateddepartures. Are there technicaldifficulties? Is he slightly unwell?Or is he simply leaving the stageduring lengthy instrumental sec-tions to let his insanely talentedband have the limelight?

We don’t find out, but thankfullywh at eve r ’s causing the abruptexits is resolved and we can thenenjoy the blues and jazz sensationand his fantastic band in all theirg l o r y.

Opening with Holding On, thesong given a makeover by Disclos-ure back in 2015, which in turnintroduced Porter to a wider audi-ence, his remarkable, inimitablebaritone vocals instantly wrap thecrowd in a fluffy blanket.

It’s a varied set from there on,with tracks from his four studioalbums making the cut. Singlesfrom his latest release, Nat KingCole & Me – an ode to his musicalidol – including the rousing Wh e nLove Was King and Nature Boyshow Porter at his most pensive ashe delivers them from a stool nextto pianist Chip Crawford, whilemore upbeat numbers like F reeand Liquid Spirit see him moreanimated and clapping along en-thusiastically; people in the audi-ence wishing they, too, were stand-ing so they could dance along.

After the beautiful Hey Laura, asong so charming and sincere ithas some people dabbing tearsfrom their eyes, Porter declares“t h e re ’s a good vibe in here”,clearly relishing performing as healways seems to. He’s not wrong.Other standout moments includeTake Me To The Alley, the titletrack from his critically-ac-claimed sophomore album, andWater Under Bridges, for which allthe band except Crawford departthe stage, creating the evening’smost solemn moment.

Rather than an encore in thetraditional sense, all musicianstake turns blowing the crowdaway with jaw-dropping solosbefore leaving one-by-one to rap-turous applause, which proves tobe another of the night’s high-lights. Porter then returns to per-form his Nat King Cole tribute,followed by the whole band for onefinal song. There is a deserved andheartfelt standing ovation.

It’s the opinion of many es-teemed critics that Porter is one ofthe great jazz vocalists of our time,and with performances like thisit’s hard to disagree.Robin Murray