Volume 19 , Issue 1 Taking the Lonely Out of Aging Since 1975 Love is the Answer Spring 2016

Martha Walters of San Anselmo has been hired as the Executive Director of LITA. Martha

will focus on growing LITA’s programs. She has more than 25 years of experience working in

the environmental sciences field and with nonprofit organizations. She holds a bachelor’s

degree in biology from the University of California at Berkeley. Martha has a solid professional

reputation of being a self-starter in whatever endeavor she commits herself to. She is deeply

committed to helping Marin County seniors become more engaged with LITA’s volunteers

through LITA’s various programs. Martha is excited to work with LITA’s Board and staff in paving a bigger future for LITA!

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By Shelley Dorssers, Pet Connection Volunteer

Martha with office dog Grace

VOLUNTEER FOCUS PET CONNECTION

Floyd and Shelley

I have been a volunteer with LITA for almost 4 years with Floyd the Wonder Dog, my therapy dog. The reason he is called a Wonder Dog is that he senses people in pain or suffering from anxiety. He has been in service 5 years working both in and out of

our home. Floyd is a Parti-colored Schnauzer weighing 17 lbs., is a non-shedding dog and he does not lick/kiss. Floyd and I started at Atria in Novato in January 2012 where he would work in Atria’s Front Room. Floyd would do tricks as the residents would give him tiny treats that I brought. Some residents wanted him to sit on their lap. Well, Floyd was only too happy to hop up and sit for a bit! For the last year, we have been visiting “Mavis” (age 92) on Wednesday mornings for coffee in Atria’s dining room. Of course, some of Floyd’s groupies are in there eating, so Floyd and I “work the dining room” offering quick visits. If Floyd could drive, he would work there 7 days a week! The LITA experience has been amazing for me and it has been very important to Mavis. She never married and had no children. Most of her family is gone, so the relationship I have with her is special. I have learned so much from Mavis. We laugh, tell stories and truly enjoy each other. Of course, we always chat about Floyd’s adventures. Spending time with Mavis is so easy and it does not feel like a chore or a duty. Some of the other

volunteer positions I have had in the past began to feel labori-ous but not with this LITA experience. Mavis and I always end our visit the same way. She walks me to the end of the sidewalk in front of Atria. I ask her if she wants a “drive by”. She always answers, yes! I drive away with my window down, waving like mad blowing her a kiss. She sits on her walker waving even harder than me. Love and licks from Shelley & Floyd

LITA will be participating in the Marin

Human Race this year. Mark your

calendars and get ready to join us on

Saturday, May 7 at 7:00 a.m. at the Marin

Center Fairgrounds & Lagoon, 10 Avenue of the Flags,

San Rafael. Join our team and sign up now using this link:

http://raceroster.com/events/2016/7175/bay-area-human-

race. If not interested in walking or running in the race you

can still donate to the cause. Send your check made payable

to Bay Area Human Race to our office and note LITA in the

memo section of your check.

JOIN US FOR THE MARIN HUMAN RACESATURDAY, MAY 7, 2016

Board of DirectorsReed McClintock, ChairBrian Finnegan, CPA, Co-TreasurerPeter BoamJenay CottrellCathy SedlockLowell SmithJessica WilliamsBill Strawbridge

Advisory BoardBetsy Best-MartiniMary Jane BurkeCheryl JenningsDiane KaljianMarianne Gontarz York, L.C.S.W.Terry McSweeneyLiz RottgerMarilyn Smith

FounderMae Wygant

LITA Staff Martha Walters, Executive DirectorMeg Stiefvater, Director of VolunteersDena Selix, Bridging Generations Program CoordinatorDebra Guerin, Office AdministratorKate Cox, Office Volunteer

LITA News Contributing Writers: Martha Walters, Dena Selix, Meg Stiefvater, Debra GuerinEditorial: Martha Walters, Kate Cox, Dena Selix, Meg Stiefvater, Debra GuerinProduction/Design:Eileen Denny Alexander

MARK YOUR CALENDAR FOR SATURDAY EVENING SEPTEMBER 10TH for LITA a la Heart to be held at The Club Restaurant at McInnis Park Golf Center. Details forthcoming.LITA’S 2015 HOLIDAY GIFT PROGRAM LITA wrapped up this past Christmas by collecting, sorting, wrapping and delivering over 750 gifts to residents in need living in Marin’s assisted living, skilled nursing facilities and board and cares. We also were able to donate over 200 gifts to low income senior housing. The importance of Holiday Gifts is far reaching. Most of the residents who receive gifts do not have family or friends to visit them; much less give them a gift during the holidays. We were able to connect with so many of our supporters in person as they made a steady stream of giving to our door. People who only knew LITA through the Holiday Gift Program stopped and discovered what we do the other 10 months of the year, and many times stepped up to volunteer. The thank you list is far reaching and reflects the generosity of our community:To all the facility activity coordinators, administrators and managers, for identifying those residents in need. To Marin businesses who gave their time and resources and collecting of gifts: Earl Barron III and Autodesk, Bobbie Bukszar and Rolling Hills Health Club, Susan Barstow and Ross Valley Rotary, Susan Lundy and Harbor Rotary Club, Paula Radtke and Elaine Thorne with the Richardson Bay Yacht Club, Irene Pelmear, Bank of Marin/Novato Branch, Marin Villages for collecting gifts when our office was closed, and Mill Valley Refuge for donating a much-needed storage container.Beautiful hand-made Holiday Cards to accompany gifts were made by: Our Lady of Loretto Religious Education Classes, Good Shepherd Lutheran School Students, STAR Academy San Rafael, Dena Selix, Project Coordinator of Bridging Generations: Cathy Sedlock and Mark Day School, Old Mill School, Brandeis-Hillel Day School, Saint Raphael School, Lu Sutton Elementary.A big thank you to all who wrapped and delivered gifts. We had more volunteers this year and we couldn’t have done it without you! THANK YOU! To Nancy Reck and Marin Sew and Sews who quilt all year to bring us works of art for residents. To LITA’s Inner Circle of dedicated support: Betsy Best-Martini, Debra Guerin, Meg Stiefvater, Martha Walters, Kate Cox, and Kelly Finnegan. Pix: Gloria HorneBetsy-Best Red Hat,Gift Wrappers 2 Senior Information Fair: LITA attended the Senior Information Fair on October 21, 2015. It was a great day to connect with our local community, make new LITA friends, and share LITA’s mission.LITA Community Partnership by Meg Stiefvater, Volunteer DirectorLITA has a long history of being involved in MAC (the Marin Activity Coordinator’s Organization), supporting area activity professionals through monthly educational workshops. As their current Volunteer Director, I have been on the MAC board for several years representing LITA and supporting the Activity departments in the facilities we serve. The San Rafael Rotary reached out to the MAC group to help implement a music program they are supporting based on the Music and Memory program featured in the popular documentary Alive Inside. The launch of their pilot program, Lighting Up Lives Through Music is meant to provide individualized play lists via iPod mini’s to low income memory care residents. MAC and LITA worked to connect San Rafael Rotary with San Rafael Health and Wellness. Twelve residents were chosen to receive the gift of individualized music. St. Isabella students are volunteering to find out what music the residents most connect with, to download the music and to introduce the music to the residents. LITA is providing San Rafael Rotary and St. Isabella’s students with tips and strategies to communicate with residents suffering from memory issues, as well as being an integral part of the orientation process for this program. It is wonderful to see the results of partnering with area organizations to better the quality of life for those living in long-term care facilities.

4340 Redwood Highway, Suite F101 San Rafael, CA 94903V: 415-472-5482F: 415-472-4965©2015 LITA

NEWS BRIEFS

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Libby Silvestri, Teacher on left, Bonnie Barron, Principal on the right with students accepting award

Volunteering for LITA was a natural fit for me. My parents, who raised me in the Catholic faith, made it their life mission to help others, whenever possible. Also, I worked in the service industry for 30 plus years, as a flight attendant. When my parents became frail in their health, I was exposed to life in a health care facility. My airline benefits allowed me to travel frequently to Ohio to see my parents. I saw firsthand how lonely and confining it was for them in a care facility. Since joining LITA, I’ve had 4 amazing ladies to add meaning and purpose to my life. Each one of these ladies lived their lives to the fullest. I think that I would have been intimidated by these ladies had I met them when they were younger as they seem quite imposing. My first LITA friend was “Joyce”. Joyce was a jazz singer. She was born and raised in London, England. She met her husband, Marvin, while singing with a big band. Marvin was the drummer in the band. Their eyes met after her performance of “Old Black Magic” and it was love at first sight. Joyce and Marvin moved to Southern California to further advance their careers, realizing there were more opportunities in America. I was able to track down a recording of Joyce’s on the web from a man in Australia. I had hoped to surprise her one Christmas but sadly she had died a few weeks before my visit. Her recording became my gift, a great memory of her voice and her friendship. “Karen” was my 2nd LITA friend. Karen was also in show business. In fact, I can see her on YouTube, singing and dancing at a very young age, in front of a big band. She was raised in Cleveland, Ohio, so we had our Buckeye State in common. She left show business at a young age. Karen became very involved with spiritual leaders and travelled the world with them. She was grateful for their teachings. Karen was overwhelmed with our friendship. She couldn’t believe someone unknown to her would build a loving friendship with her. She would call me and thank me for being there for her. I still have her messages on my phone recorder. There is love in giving, just as there is love in receiving. “Roberta” became my 3rd LITA friend. Roberta was a devout Catholic, so it was nice to pray together and share our faith. Roberta arrived in Marin as a young girl from Connecticut. She volunteered at the Red Cross canteen, at Hamilton Air Force Base and met her husband there. He was in the Air Force and they travelled on standby often, especially to Hawaii. Roberta and I shared our love of Hawaii and the ups and downs of stand-by travel. I attended her funeral mass, the celebrant was the Archbishop of San Jose, formally the pastor of my church, Our Lady of Loretto. Archbishop Daly is now the Archbishop of Oregon and is a dear friend of her family.

VOLUNTEER FOCUS ONE-TO-ONE CONNECTIONBy Grace Tullis LITA Volunteer

My current LITA friend is “Sally”. Two years before entering a health care facility, due to being diagnosed with ALS, Sally competed in a Triathlon at the age of 80! She won the gold medal in her age group. She lived life with boundless energy and adventure. She hitch hiked to Alaska at age 50. Sally opened the first business center and a bed & breakfast in the area she settled into in Alaska. She loved to fish, bike ride, and hike, and taught dance. She has authored 11 books. She has a Masters in Physical Education. When I first met Sally, she enjoyed telling

me all about her amazing life in Alaska. Sadly, her disease has advanced and she can no longer speak. Sally’s emotions are the only way she can communicate. She shares a big, beautiful smile, copious amounts of tears and a ravenous hunger for the frozen fruit ice pops that I bring to her when I visit. Knowing how much she loved dancing, I bring my IPad to share all the dancing posts I receive. Spending time with Sally and being present is

worth more than words to her. The favorite saying “You may be one person to the world, but you may also be the world to one person” is how Sally makes me feel by being her friend. Her eyes express this sentiment. Spending time with my LITA friends is precious time. Elderly people give us a valuable gift, namely depth and character. Friendship is about inner life… thoughts, emotions, heart and soul. Kindness and compassion, with a smile and a listening ear, is all that is needed to create a memorable friendship. Volunteering will make you realize how fortunate you are, how precious life is and the value of good health.

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Dedicated volunteers always needed for our One-to-One Friends and Pet Connection Programs

Volunteers who feel comfortable visiting elders with memory care issues

Male volunteer who likes to play chess

A Cantonese speaking volunteer

A Portuguese speaking volunteer

Current LITA Volunteers Needed:

Lu Sutton 3rd graders enthusiastically join Atria Resident Charm Hardy in her daily exercise class.

The PeTe Croughan award

Allensby Charity Fund Trust/ San Rafael Elks ClubAlison FullerAlison RobertsAllison PuglisiAlthea MarkavageAmy BarrAndrea BellAndrea StarAnn KinzellAnn OcheltreeArlene HansenBarbara LeeBonnie ManningBonnie PenpraseBonnie RyanBrian FinneganBrigitte GrabischBudd JonesCarol ColgateCarol Shagoury-HarperCarolyn LemonCharles & Rebecca OkenChevron Matching Employee FundsChristine ScottClair NormanClaudia FarbmanCorinne HedrickCounty of Marin David ReinsteinDavid Walters, EsqDean & Chalayne GallinattiDeanna CumberlandDiana JorgensenDiane AldrichDiane CampbellDonald & Virginia HumphreysDonald PlaceDore Selix-Gabby

Doreen MiaoEileen MurrayElissa LozierMr. & Mrs. Emil EricksonEmily MorrisEvan SedlockF. Michael LandramFrances CapperGary SpratlingGerry O’SullivanGloria HorneHelen DavisHelena MadsenHennessy Advisors, Inc.J. Dietrich StroehJ. Scott PattersonJames & Roberta RomeoJames DourJan CarrJane MillerJanet BenjaminJanet BukszarJean SoostJenay CottrellJenny ChurchJerry Current Jessica WilliamsJohn & Susan RistowJohn RohrbacherJohn RutledgeJosefina WhitmoreJosephine LewisJoyce JensenJudith LoringJudy BisseyJudy CutlerJulie ValenteKai CrockerKaren EmersonKaren Kindig

Kate CoxKatherine RolstonKathleen EddeKathleen NorwoodKay WhiteKlarika CoteKurt Cahenzli & Vicki Jackson Linda BocciaLinda BlackwoodLinda LeveyLisa & Dominic MantuaLucy De La FuenteLynda GraberMae Wygant & Gene GressleyMarcia FryslieMargaret SchlachterMargaret StawowyMarilynne ForgusonMarisa CastaldiniMartin & Margaret ShetlarMartin VermeulenMary Jane BurkeMary TiernanMatt WhiteMaureen GoldfarbMichael BorckMichele & John RutledgeMiguel DelgadoNadine TarpleyNani RobertsonNorthern California Presbyterian HomeOverlook International FoundationPatricia BeckerPatricia KielyPatricia VerrierePaul LofholmPaul SassePaul & Anne Brenner

Paul DinovitzPaula MachadoPaula RadtkePeter BoamPeter Maier Family FoundationPetroleum Sales, Inc.Phyllis HancockRafelina MaglioRaymond & Barbara NannReed McClintock & AssociatesRegina Bianucci RusRichard & Alice SheltonRobert & Mary Ann ForslandRobert GuyRobert LandiRobert Dean PuettRussell & Kathleen KetronRuth VogelRuth BartonSandra SlaterSATO FoundationSAVEMART SupermarketsSheila FontaineShirley CiceroSigrid AltgeltSpencer & Roberta MichelsSteven SloanSylvia TomasovichTeri HauswirthTonee NormanTerra Linda Christian HomesThe GapThe Tamalpais Residents’ AssocationThrivent FinancialUnited MarketsWalter & Anne RidenourWilliam & Virginia LehmannWilliam and Utta TelliniWilliam Strawbridge

THANK YOU TO OUR GENEROUS SUPPORTERS! Donations Received August 2015 - January 2016. If our records are incorrect, we apologize. Please call us with the correct information at (415) 472-5482

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As the Bridging Generations program entered its eighth year, Marin County seniors and students got to know each other by playing games, exercising, sharing traditions and creating art. One project that everyone clearly enjoyed was “Helping Hands”. As partners traced each other’s hands onto the same paper, filling space with facts about their lives and interests, conversations came alive. With prompts such as “What do you do with your hands?” or “What do you play with your hands?” seniors shared memories including artistic talents and work experiences, both paid and volunteer.

Robin Daly a resident at The Tamalpais, told Bacich 2nd graders about the significance of helping elders in the community as she chose to do as a young girl. Remembering her desire to reach out to others as a child, Robin taught a valuable lesson about giving one’s time and attention. Quoting author, poet and civil rights activist Maya Angelou, she asserted, “People will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.” Such wisdom prevailed among residents at all first semester visits. Annette Carrell, a longtime program participant who also lives at The Tamalpais, reminded her younger buddy about the importance of loving oneself. Mira and Annette titled their hands project “Hooray for Me”. At last year’s farewell visit, this optimistic woman told her young partner, “We Share the Moon”. Although about 75% of 2nd through 5th graders had never been to a senior home, most seemed confidently engaged and interested in their older friends who made them feel at ease.

Inspirational seniors eagerly became role models and teachers as they shared life experiences and educated youth about meaningful relationships and thoughtful decisions. Showing interest in their new mentors, students became compassionate listeners as they leaned in with attentive eye contact. Offering facts and events from their own lives became natural as they gained trust in the elders. Such interactions complemented the elementary schools’ curriculum that focuses on their communities and family ancestry. The annual Bridging Generations/Nancy’s List community service project where both generations worked together for UCSF Benioff Children’s Hospital was a big hit. Working as a team, each group of seniors and students revealed their genuine empathy as they wrote and decorated cards for the young recipients in pediatric oncology. With these mutually beneficial meetings throughout the school year, students’ self-esteem often increases knowing they are cheering up and giving hope to seniors who give them unconditional support. Just as importantly, older adults’ quality of life improves as they feel valued rather than targets of ageism. Joyful smiles and palpable energy permeate the room during these intergenerational friendship visits where participants’ sole concern is getting to know each other.

LENDING A HANDBy Dena Selix, LITA Bridging Generations Coordinator

2015-16 BRIDGING GENERATIONS

PARTICIPANTSBacich Elementary at The Tamalpais in Greenbrae

Brandeis Hillel Day School at Drake Terrace in San Rafael

Cascade Canyon at Bello Gardens in San Anselmo

The Cove School at Aegis Corte Madera

Lu Sutton Elementary at Atria Tamalpais Creek in Novato

Mark Day School at Aldersly and Alma Via in San Rafael

Saint Raphael School at WindChime in Kentfield

People will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel. -Maya Angelou

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Carolyn Lemon .....................................Kate Cox

Kathleen Edde ................................... Leta Edde

Helena Madsen ..................Peter & Malina Kozel

Linda Boccia .................................. Julian Borrel

Claudia Farbman............... Clara & Frank Nausin

Clair Norman .................. Craig & Elena McClain

Miguel Delgado ........................... Cathy Sedlock

Jan Carr ....................................Jeannette Barns

Eileen Murray ...............................Marcella Hunt

In Memory of In Honor of Kate Cox ................................................................. Aline Shaw

Jenny Church ......................................................Deloris Church

Scott & Diane Patterson ......Philip Sauer & Elizabeth Dunscombe

Judy Bissey ......................................Pat Lewis & Pete Croughan

Carol Shagoury-Harper ............................................... Harry Cox

John Rohrbacher ................................Jack & Margo Rohrbacher

Rafelina & Anthony Maglio ............................ Maria Gampilongo

Gerald O’Sullivan .......................................................... Bea Hill

Josephine Whitmore ...........................................Richard Becker

Judy Cutler ...........................................................Clara Johnson

Mae Wygant & Gene Gressley........... Charles & Catherine Banks

Deanna Cumberland ...................................... Sarah Mary Cade

Anne Ridenour ............................................................Pat Lewis

Marcia Fryslie .............................................................Pat Lewis

Helen Davis ................................................................Pat Lewis

William & Tonee Norman .............................................Pat Lewis

Roberta & James Romeo ............................................Pat Lewis

Ben Tanner Fund .........................................................Pat Lewis

Volunteer Brown Bag Education WorkshopA Brown Bag Education Workshop will be held Tuesday, April 5 from 12:00-1:00. The speaker will be the Marin County Ombudsman, Meredith Burrell. Meredith will help volunteers learn about the Ombudsman Program and how and when they can support volunteers. Many times a LITA volunteer needs to advocate for their friend and knowing how to do this will be an important tool supporting LITA friendships.

SUPPORT LITA BY SHOPPING USING eSCRIP!Directly support LITA by shopping at participating merchants. Refer to our website for more detail on how to sign up,

how eScrip works, the safety of giving out credit card numbers and shopping online using the eScrip Online Mall.

SUPPORT LITA BY SHOPPING AT LUCKY AND UNITED MARKETS!Call us and we will send you a card. No pre-registration required.

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Continued on page----------

Wednesday, March 23, 2016, 5:00-8:00 p.m.

Whistlestop Jackson Café

930 Tamalpais Avenue, San Rafael This workshop was created and produced by the members of the Marin Aging Action Initiative Mental Health and Dementia Workgroup. The initiative is a collective effort of over 65 different agencies including LITA, grassroots organizations, commissions and neighborhood groups, funded by the County of Marin, and coordinated by MarinSpace.

When interacting with older adults, learn how to detect behaviors that might reflect mental health or dementia issues, and how to compassionately respond and connect them to resources.

This FREE workshop focuses first on Detection, including normal aging vs. abnormal aging behavior. You will gain insight to identify symptoms and observable behaviors. The workshop then focuses on Connection, including responding in the moment to the observable behavior with empathy and compassion, effective communication techniques, and how best to connect the person to appropriate support services.

Who Should Attend Community members who regularly support the needs of older adults.

Whistlestop is next to Golden Gate Terminal. If eligible for Whistlestop paratransit service, call 415-456-9062 and schedule a ride. Whistlestop free parking lot is across the street on Tamalpais, metered parking and garages nearby.

Registration for this event closes March 18.

WELCOME NEW VOLUNTEERS!February 2015 - July 2015

Elizabeth Pedley and “Zelda” Hilary Sciarillo and “Maggie” Kay Astroth and “Winks” Lauren Weidelman and “Maya” Margaret, Julia & Lulu Hemley and “Bandit”

Maria Gregoriev and “Inga” Wes Andrues and “Lola” Laura Baquerizo Jennifer Thomas Kelly Kinnard Rosalie Yachnin

WELCOME BACK RE-MATCHED VOLUNTEERS! Barbara Peleg Bruce Nelson Nancy Outenreach Rico Provasoli Ed Dollard & “Bella” Stephanie Rice Lynda Graber Grace Tullis

DESIGNATE PLANNED GIFTS TO LITA THROUGH THE MAE WYGANT LEGACY SOCIETYNamed after LITA’s founder, The Mae Wygant Society is comprised of special friends of LITA who have

demonstrated their commitment to the mission and future of LITA’s programs by making planned gifts.

Supporters can join the society by:

Making a bequest to LITA through their wills

Naming LITA as a beneficiary of their IRA or life insurance policy

Naming LITA as a beneficiary of a trust

For more information, please call Martha Walters at (415) 472-5482

Detect & Connect: A Workshop on Mental Health and Dementia Issues in Older Adults

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NON-PROFIT ORG

U.S. POSTAGE

PAID

NOVATO, CA 94947

PERMIT NO. 50

LITA (Love is the Answer)4340 Redwood Highway, Suite F101San Rafael, CA 94903www.litamarin.org

RETURN SERVICE REQUESTED

Taking the lonely out of aging since 1975.

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Please email us your email. Help LITA go green. If you haven’t already, please send your email address to us at litamarin@sbcglobal.net. Thanks!

Save the Date:September 10, 2016 – Lita A La Heart

SERVICES FOR OLDER ADULTS WITH LIMITED MOBILITY

Whistlestop Wheels: 415-456-9062 Learn about all of your transportation support

options. Talk to a Travel Navigator who will share eligibility details for special-needs door-to-door

transportation, the taxi program, the STAR volunteer driver program and more.Telephone Reassurance Program:

415-456-9062 x132 Sign up for a regular check-in call.

Senior Center Without Walls: 877-797-7299 Join calls for games, book reading, conversation

groups and more.Meals on Wheels: 415-457-4636

Have daily meals delivered to your home by caring, friendly individuals.