VOCATIONAL AND MARITAL HAZARDS OF MIDDLE AGE

Vocational and marital adjustments during middle age are the most difficult to make and thus the mosthazardous. Satisfactory adjustments in these areas are even more important to happiness than personal and social adjustments, and failure to make them is at the basis of much middle-aged dissatisfaction. Members of both sexes are faced with these hazards, though the

effects may be slightly different.

Vocational Hazards While many vocational hazards of middle age

are similar to those of early adulthood, described in Chapter 10, some are particularly characteristic of this period. Of these, eight are especially common

and serious.

Failure to Reach Earlier Goals Failure to reach a goal set earlier is an ego-deflating experience for mid- dle-aged people because they know that this is the peak time for achievements and that they are unlikely to attain their goals in old age. Their reactions to the failure to reach their goals will affect their attitudesto ward themselves and the kind of personal and socialadjustments they make now and when they reach old age. In discussing the effects of failure to achieve

earlier-set goal, Bischof has pointed out (7):

Middle age is a "time of truth." Dreams and aspira- tions may have carried the man well through his 20s, 30s, and into his 40s. . . When a man gets

to be 50 or so he settles his brains, if he is wise, to the realities of life. He must learn to coperate with the inevitable, Whatever it was he had in his youn- ger days that gave him the confidence to plan dream may not have been adequate for the ad- vancement he sought in his occupation. Many men when faced with this time of truth may seek solace in at least one of two way[; compensation or rationalization.

AIDDLE AGE: VOCATIONAL AND FAMILY ADJUSTMENTS 375

BOX 12-9 AREAS OF PREPARATION FOR OLD

AGE Social Contacts

with contemporaries be.

middleuld form ndships of community

Health Because

social contacts wit

Freparation for old age should include health measures that will prevent or mitigate the effects or the chronic or debilitating diseases of old age. This includes diet, excercise and regular medica check-ups.

aged men and

women shoulo

with neighbors and members

come increasingly

difficult in old age

orga to avoie be-

themselves nizations who are younger

than they to

coming socially

isolated, thusS assuring al contacts in old age.

Retirement of a continuation

of social

Middle-aged people who have prepared for voca tional retirement, or for termination of the parenta role by acquiring new interests and engaging in

new activities, adjust better to old age than those

who have made no such preparation.

Role Changes

Middle-aged men and women must prepare for

the role changes that are inevitable in old age,

whetherin business, in the home, or in commu

nity activities. It is especially important that thev

learn gradually to relinquish leadership roles. t

play the role of follower, and to adapt to this

change.

Use of Leisure Time

In preparation for old age, middle-aged people should pursue hobbies and acquire interests that

will be satisfactory in old age when they must give up more strenuous leisure-time activities.

Life Patterns Financial Independence

Middle-aged people should learn to live on in- comes equivalent to what their social security and pension incomes will be when they retire. In addi-tion, they should try to set aside a nest egg for emergencies even if it means foregoing some of the expenditures for status symbols and pleasures their friends enjoy.

Middle-aged people should recognize that cir.

cumstances in old age, such as poor health or re-

duced income, may force them to move from their

homes and to change their lite patterns. Those

who are unprepared to make such changes will have difficulty in adjusting to a new pattern of liie

and will be unhappy.

Decline in Creativity Even though their level of pro-

ductivity may remain the same or even improve, many middle-aged workers show a decline in vocaà tional creativity. This makes middle-aged workers less

satisfied with their achievements and they are no

onger acclaimed for their creativity, as they were ear-

Not all men and women cling to their early as pirations. Some revise them because they have be come more realistic, while others do so because their values have changed. Whatever motivates this revi- sion, it is important because it eliminates the potentialhazard stemming from failure to come up to earlier aspirations and expectations. In a forty-year follow-up of Terman's "gifted group," Oden pointed out that some of the "C men-those least successful voca-

tionally-fell below their expectations because of value changes as they grew older. As she explained, It should not be overlooked that a few of the C men have deliberately chosen not to seek 'success,'

expressing a preference for a less competitive way of life with greater oppotunity for personal happiness and freedom from pressure to pursue their avoca-

tional interests" (76).

lier.

This decline may not be due to a lessening o

mental abilities or to mental rigidity, as is widely D lieved, but rather to the fact that middle-aged worker have less time for creative work than they did beo as a result of the added responsibilities and pressu that come with success. As has alrea been pointe

as Out, those who were successful earlier are usud"signed leadership roles when they his leaves them litle free time for the mentalpSsential to creativity (7,23).

reach middle age

376 CHAPTER TWELVE

While boredo is also a vocational haz- Boredon

ard during early

workers more than dulthood, it affects middle-agedyounger workers because their stimulating jobs grow slim-

Boredom is especially

work environments makes them feel like litle cogs in

big machines. Even professional workers feel that, in

the large professional complexes characteristic of cities today, they have little opportunity to get to know their patients or clients and, as a result, the friendly interaction they used to enjoy is a thing of the past. For many professional workers, as is true ot workers in other areas, this takes away much of the

enjoyment they formerly experienced in their work.

ces of finding more

cha ith each passing year.

mer common among industrial workers who find that au-

mansh As kard has pointed out (78): tomation

is increasin, replacing individual work

repetitic jtious arm movement he makes hour after The ho is excrucia ciatingly boring. His father, he recalls, Feeling of Being Trapped" Many middle-aged

Workers who are not happy in their work feel that

they are trapped" for the rest of their working lives and will never be able to free inemselves until they reach retirement age. Younger workers who are dis-

satisfied or bored with their jobs know that, sooner or

later, they can usually find other work more to their

liking. Most middle-aged people, however, feel that

they must stay in a job or even a line of work they dis like because it is either too late or because ongoing

family responsibilities prevent their taking time out to

retrain for a new line of work (40). One middle-aged

man put it this way when interviewed about his atti-

tude toward his work (106):

was poor. but a aftsman who was proud of the made. Here the machine has all the barrels he

hrains, all the reason for pride. Perhaps the rules also forbid him to talk to workers nearby, or to get a drink of water except at the break period.

Bigness" The tendency toward "bigness" in busi-

ness, industry, and the protessions is a vocational

hazard to many of today s middle-aged workers.

Having been accustomed to working in a friendly, in- formal atmosphere where they knew their coworkers

and where coffee breaks and other leisure occasions

were times for comradeship, working8 in the large, im- Dersonal atrmosphere characteristic of many of today's

Sure I feel trapped. Why shouldn't I? Twenty-five

years ago, a dopey 18-year-old college kid made

up his mind that I was going to be a dentist. So

now herel am, know is: who told that kid he could decide what

was going to do with the rest of my life?

100 dentist. 'm stuck. What I want to 14

90 weeks

80

70 5-14 weeks

Unemployment Unemployment is always serious

though more so in times of economic recession than

in times of prosperity. Young adults who are fired or

who give up their jobs can, normally, count on get

ting new ones in a relatively short time. However,

finding a new job becomes increasingly difficult with

each passing year, and the period of unemployment

grows increasingly longer, as may be seen in Figure

12-7 (86). In times of reasonably good business it has

been estimated that it takes about one year to get a

new job after being fired-not always because of in-

efficiency but often because of consolidations and

mergers. And, because people still equate being fired

with incompetency, a new job is often less important

and has less responsibility than the old one (64) Four groups of middle-aged workers are espe-

cially vulnerable to unemployment: those with low

IQs, women, men of minority groups, and executives

60 50 15-26

weeks40

30 20 27+

weeks

10

14-24 25-34 35-44 45-64 65+

Age

RE 12-7 For hole, the period

the working population as a

of unemployment increases

with

Fassing year. (From the Report of the President's

Ouncil on Aging. 1961.) 377 MIDDLE AGE:

VOCATIONAL AND FAMILY ADJUSTMENTS

Middle-aged workers who take pride in their work are less likely than other middle-aged workers to feel bored or trapped in their jobs. (Bruce Roberts from Photo Researchers.)

members, and they are far more likely to be laid off

during periods of economic recession or depression. Middle-aged women who want to reenter the bust ness world after their children are grown, and who try to prepare for this by learning new skills or brushin8 up on old ones, often find that the available jobs go to

younger women (26,28).

or those in middle-management level jobs. In the case of workers with low IQs, Anman has explained that with the increased use of automation "we are elimi- nating the 80 IQ jobs but haven't yet determined what to do with the 80 IQ jobless" (1).

Women, even during periods of prosperity, and men of minority groups are nmore subject to unem-ployment than men who are not minority-group When executives or men in middle-manage- 378 CHAPTER TWELVE

demoted because of man- ment

positi are fired or

on

lower levels. Mer in the forty-five to fifty-five age

up are more in emand than those over fifty-five,

hut there

are son in the latter age bracket who are

rtunate enough to land new jobs, even at lower pay

ageme

ent shifts or mergers with other organizations,

ey are

far less like

organizations shift their workers more during the

twenties and thirties, executives and middle-manage- ment personnel are sometimes shifted during middle

age. This is especially likely to happen if they are

slated to climb the company ladder or if there is a

merger of the company for which they have been

working with another company. Most middle-aged people resist moving, espe-

cially if they still have teenage children at school orif

their wives have jobs or ate active"in community or-

ganizations. Knowing how seriously their children's

social lives will be affected if they are uprootedat

Such a critical age, and how hard it will be for heir

wives to get jobs in the new community or to play

roles in the new community organizations, makes

many middle-aged men try to find some solution to

this dilemma.

likely to get new jobs than are those they

ortu

and with less prestige (2).

Unemployment is a seFious psychological haz-

1or any orker, regardless of age, sex, race, or ard ority-group status. Those who have been unem-minork

ployed fora long time often develop feelings of inade-

quac acy and of being unwanted, which result in either

averaggressIveness or extreme passivity, both of

hich are handicaps to possible future employment. whic Walters contends (115):

l am confirmed in my beliet that widespread unem-

nloyment-and underemployment-at middle age

is one of this country's most serious social prob-

lems. . The shattering eftect on individual lives

cause enough for action. Alcoholism, Depression,

Mental Illness, Suicide. Even tor those who over

come or avoid these and eventually find work

again, the experience takes its toll. . . . Another

compelling reason tor action to alleviate joblessness

at middle age is the eftect it is having on the morale

of many Americans. Many of the victims are terribly bitter, totally disillusioned.

Unfortunately, many have no alternative but to

move. While they may be willing to forgo a raise if it

means moving to a new community, there is some-

times no alternative if their company relocates after a

merger or if, having become unemployed, the only

jobs available are in other communities (118).

Marital Hazards

Although some of the marital hazards of middle

age are similar to those of early adulthood, most stem

from changes in the pattern of family life that occur at

this time and thus are unique to middle age. Further-

more, marital hazards are often more serious now

than they were in early adulthood because the

chances of establishing good adjustments grow slim-

mer as time passes and as the children leave home,

lowering the adult's motivation to provide a happy

family atmosphere. While marital hazards have a greater direct im-

pact on middle-aged women than on middle-aged

men, since the woman's life has been centered

around her home and family for many years, they

have an important indirect effect on the man's voca-

tional life. As has been pointed out before, not only

do the attitudes of different family members, espe-

cially those of the wife, influence the man's attitude

toward his work and thus his vocational adjustments,

but his adjustment to his family life also affects the

quality of his work and his dedication to it. A man

whose family life is stresstul and unhappy, for exam-

ple, finds it difficult to give his wholehearted attention

to his work and may become a vocational under-

achiever. Also, because competing with other work

ers requires more concentrated effort in middle age

Unfavorable Attitudes toward Job Unfavorable atti-

tudes toward their jobs can have detrimental effects

on the achievements and personal adjustments of

middle-aged workers. Like students who dislike

school or college, dissatisfied workers often become

underachievers and complainers who, in turn, under

mine the morale of those around them.

If workers are dissatisfied because they feel

trapped in jobs they dislike or because they think their

ace, sex, or some other condition over which they

have no control is blocking their path to success, they

will develop feelings of martyrdom and these will in

tenstty unfavorable attitudes. This militates against

their holding the jobs they already have and makes

Belting and holding new jobs far more difficult than it

otherwise might be.

Geographic Mobility Some middle-aged workers

Taced with the necessity of moving to another

unity, often miles away from where they now

E, to hold onto a iob or to get another one if they

unemployed. While many business and industrial

379 MIDDLE AGE:

VOCATIONAL AND FAMILY ADJUSIMENTS

Vea.

than earlier, the middle-aged unhappy is doubly disadvanta

OKins Festure

Syndieet,

ne., TO77,

Wrid nahte roserv

is

A number of hazards the good personal and

aged man whose hon

ntaged in this respect.

SOCial adjustments of middle-aged men an The develop from conditions within their marriage most important of these are discussed below.

Kole Changes As has been pointed out earlier, roie cnanges are a serious hazard for the woman. wne the children leave home, she finds herself in much the

same position that the typical man does at retirement unemployed. Few women, however, receive prep aration for this, as many men now do from their em-

ployers. As one woman has put it, "Freshman have

neir advisers to help them to adjust to the changes nat college life brings, but who helps the parent

emeritus?" (113).

T

While most mothers want their children to be

independent when they are developmentally ready, to have homes and families of their own, and to be

successful in their work, many put roadblocks in their children's paths when the time actually comes for

them to be on their own. Instead of gladly relinquish-ing the burden they have carried for years, many mothers cling to it because they fear that their lives

will now seem empty and futile. For such women, the

ending of the parental role is a traumatic experience,and neurotic difficulties are often the aftermath (25,

uThe trouble with housework is there's so little: room for advancement."

FIGURE 12-8 Middle-aged women often sufer i boredom resulting from the monotony of housew and the realization that there is no chance fora

vancement in the housewite role (Don Tobin, ". Little Woman." King Features Syndicate, January 1

1977. Used by permission.)

ing roles. Many middle-aged women of today, recog nizing that there are opportunities in the vocatio

world, decide to learn new skills or to brush up or

any they once had that have become rusty by attens ing training schools or colleges (97). Other wome who lack money for this, or lack support and encour

agement from their husbands, just continue to te

bored and, as a result, make poor personal, marnta

and social adjustments.

79).

Boredom Just as vocational workers become bored with jobs that are highly repetitious, due to automa-

tion, or with jobs in which there is little or no chance for advancement, so women who have devoted their adult lives to homemaking often become bored in middle age. By then, the novelty of housekeeping has long since worn off, motivation decreases as family size shrinks when children leave home, and feelings of standing still begin to play a dominant role. All of these add to the boredom that results from repetition.

Opposition to a Child's Marriage A serious probr ble

sometimes arises when a teenage or even a r0

As middle-aged women see their husbands

climb the vocational ladder and then compare this with their own work in the home, they not only be-

come bored but, even worse, they become discon- tented and dissatisfied because they see little or no chance for advancement in the roles they keep play-

ing year after year. Refer to Figure 12-8. Just as boredom in a vocation leads to unde-

achievement and discontent, so it does in homemak-

child marries someone their middle-age parents

not approve. If they oppose the marriage, it m miltalte

against their making satisfactory adjustmEe to the

child's departure from the home. Such oppos generally creates a barrier between the o the child, with the result that contacts w are few and relationships with grand with their child's in-laws are strained an unfavorable.

parents an

there

380 CHAPTER TWELVE

BOX 12-110

ATTITUDES MILITATING AGAINST THE

TABLISHMEN OF GOOD

she faces in making satisfactory adjustments to the new role she must play now that the children have lefthome. This hazard to good marital adjustment affects men as well.

RELATIONSHIPS WITH A SPOUSE

Husband's Attitudes

. Dissatisfaction with sexual adjustments f he is successful vocationally, the feeling that his wite has not kept pace with him in his

Many men and women make this adjustment Successfuly and are even happier in their marriage

than they were during the child-rearing years, but for others it is a hazardous transition. The most important attitudes on the part of husband and wife that militate against the establishment of good relationships are 8iven in Box 12-10. Many of these unfavorable atti tudes have been developing over the years and by middle age they are often so deep-rooted that they are

impassible to eradicate.

upward climb

f he is unsuccesstul vocationally, the feeling that his wife has been of no help and may even have handicapped him . The feeling that he and his wife have little in

common because she has refused to be in- terested in the things that are important to

him A critical attitude toward his wife's manage ment of the home and the family finances and a belief that her child-training methods have been too permissive

Dissatisfaction with his wife's appearance The feeling that his wife dominates him and

treats him like a child

Sexual Adjustments Failure to achieve a good rela-

tionship with the spouse inevitably has an adverse

effect on sexual relationships during middle age. This is a hazard to good marital adjustments and contrib utes greatly to disenchantment with marriage during this period.

A woman who is disenchanted with her

marriage may try to compensate for this by devoting her time and energies to helping her grown children,

by becoming active in community afairs, or by

having an extramarital relationship with a man who

she feels appreciates her more than her husband Wife's Attitudes

Dissatisfaction with sexual adjustments Disillusionment with her husband because of

his lack of vocational success The feeling of being a slave to the home or to

an elderly relative The belief that her husband is stingy about

money for clothes and recreation The belief that her husband does not appreci-

ate the time and effort she has devoted to

homemaking The feeling that her husband is more in-

terested in his career than in her

does. The middle-aged man whose sexual life is un-

satisfactory may likewise turn to extramarital affairs,

or he may feel guilty because he has failed to give his

wife sexual gratification. Wallin and Clark have ex-

plained (114):

The feeling that her husband spends too much time and money on members of his

own family

he suspicions that he is involved with an-

other women

Women's lack of sexual gratification has repercus

sions for their husbands as well as for themselves.

In a culture that stresses the equality of marital

partners and the right of both to sexual enjoyment,

it is to be expected that husbands will tend to suffer

some guilt in urging an activity they know is not

pleasurable to their wives. Added to the guilt, and

accentuating it, may be feelings of inadequacy en-

gendered in husbands by the thought that the fault

is or could be theirs.

Inability to Establish Satisfactory Relationships with

opmental tasks of middle age is that of establishing the pouse as a Person One of the important

devel-

A serious hazard to good sexual adjustments

Juring middle age is the unfavorable attitude of youn-

ger members of the family-especially teenagers

toward sexual behavior on the part of their parents

(18,84). As McKain has said, "Most children have

never thought of their parents in the role of husband

relationships with a spouse. This is espe satisfactory y difficult for the woman because of the probie

381 MIDDLE AGE: VOCATIONAL AND FAMILY ADJUSTMENTS

and wife. Instead, they have seen them only as mother and father-a self-sacrificing, asexual, and narrow role" (61).

One factor in the ultimate breakdown of some of the marriages was "grudges" which had been cherished on both sides for many years. Several

husbands were preoccupied with unanswered qUes. tions about possible sexual activity of their wives either before or after the marriage. . . . Many of

the wives held grudges about their suffering during pregnancies and their husbands attitudes towar them at that time. . . . The actual turning point for the wife depends on many tactors-release from the confining care of small children, the end of a

shared endeavor (such as building and furnishing a home), a sense that life is slipping by or encourage

The awareness that their children have such at- titudes tends to make middle-aged parents self-con- Scious about their sexual behavior or to regard it as something to be ashamed of "at their age." This is un-

questionably hazardous to good sexual adjustments.

Caring for an Elderly Parent Caring for an elderly parent in their home is a serious hazard for many

middle-aged couples because it interferes with their

adjustment to each other after the children begin to

leave home. It also interferes with good sexual adjust-

ment from another woman.

Remarriage Remarriage in middle age is likely to be hazardous, especially when it follows divorce. Such marriages are more likely to end in divorce than those of younger people who remarry after having been di vorced (47,73). While financial problems plague younger adults who remarry following divorce, prob lems of adjustment to each other and toa new pattern

of living are more likely to interfere with the success of remarriage in middle age. It is always difficult for middle-aged people to change their roles and follow new patterns of living (19,90,96).

Because changing patterns established over a period of years is always difficult and because many middle-aged people have become accustomed to the homes they have lived in for years, some people try to avoid the adjustment problems of remarriage by co- habitation. This is far from widespread at the present time and is limited mainly to middle-agers in the large cities where the chances of gossip and ostracism are slight as compared with suburban or smaller com- munities (75).

ments. To complicate the situation, the elderly relative

is usually the mother of one of the spouses. If she does not want to change her role from that of head of a

household to that of a dependent, she may try to dominate, as she did in her own home. This leads to

friction with all family members and results in a gen- erally stressful home climate.

Loss of Spouse Loss of a spouse due to death or di- vorce during middle age is hazardous to good per sonal and social adjustments because of the many problems, discussed in detail earlier, that result from death or divorce. Loss of a spouse in middle age is more likely to be due to divorce than to death while the reverse is true in old age. Refer to Figure 10-10, which shows how divorce reaches a peak in early middle age.

Because of this, divorce or threat of divorce is one of the most serious marital hazards of middle age. In contrast to younger people, who usually seek a di-

vorce because of sexual incompatibility, parental in-

terference, or disenchantment with marriage and parenthood, most middle-aged people divorce be- cause the husband or wife has been unfaithful, be- cause they feel their spouse has become irresponsible or is constantly nagging, or because they no longer have anything in common (8,83,93).

Because divorce in middle age is "major sur- gery" for both men and women, they do not rush into it impulsively, as many young adults often do (106). However, there is evidence that divorce in middle age is the result of conditions that have worsened and

persisted over the years until they finally became in- tolerable. Dame et al. have explained (22):

ASSESSMENT OF ADJUSTMENT TO MIDDLE AGE

Middle age should be a time of "payoff" and of new found freedom, not only from the cares and respons bilities of the home, but also from economic proo lems and worries. It should also be a time to redefinin8 oneself as a person rather than as just "Mother" or "Father," and it should be a time of con- tentment and satisfaction derived from a feeling that

the years have been well spent But for far too many people, uniortunately

382 CHAPTER TWELVE

dle age is a time ot regrets, of disappointments, and of general unhappiness. They may be plagued by financial problems, VOcational worries, career fail-

Achievements The first criterion of adjustment is achievement.

The closer middle-aged people come to achieving the goals they set for themselves earlier, the better sat- isfied and, hence, the better adjusted they will be.

Even when middle-aged people have been as successful as could reasonably be expected, consid-

ering the.: abilities and training, they often feel that

they have been failures because they have clung to aspirations developed in youth or even in childhood.

As Whitman has explained (116):

ures, or marital difficulties of long standing which

problems at this age. Even worse, often feel that they are failures

flare up into

middle-aged people nd that it is now too late to achieve all they had

serious

hoped to. As kson has pointed out, "In middle life

wanted to doo but what we actually have done" (27).

we begin to see not so much what we and beyond

The high suicide rate among middle-aged poble is evidence that this is far too often a time of noor adjustment (107). In one study it was found that the suicide rate starts to climb between the ages of thirty-six and forty years, reaching its peak between

forty and sixty years. It then declines in the sixties, only to rise again at seventy. Suicide is more common among men than among women, and money prob- lems are the major cause (41 ). Rates of suicide at dif-

ferent ages are shown in Figure 12-9.

Four criteria can be used to determine how

Many middle-aged men and women feel like fail-ures when they aren't failures at all. They are

merely using the wrong tape measure. They look at

themselves in their 40s and 50s and take their mea- Sures by the standards of childhood dreams and ambitions. These standards are as ill-fitting to their present stature as the trousers or the dresses they

wore when they were youngsters. Childhood

dreams are wonderful for children: but when we

keep clinging to them in our middle years, they can make failures of us all. This is not because the childhood dreams are wrongit is rather that we misunderstand their function. . . . Somewhere in the middle years we must let go of the dream. We must, in our maturity, recognize the dream tor what

it really is: a childhood spur to get us on our way, a goal.

well middle-aged men and women have adjusted to

this period of the life span: first, their achievements; second, their emotional states; third, the effects of their adjustments at this age on their personalities; and fourth, how happy or unhappy they are. Each of these criteria will be discussed in detail below.

3,200

Male 2,800

| Female 2,400

2,000

1,600

1,200

800

400

Under 15 15-20 21-25 26-30 31-35 36-40 41-45 46-50 51-55 56-60 61-65 66-70 Over 70 Age

FIGURE 12-9 The suicide rate is highest among middle-aged persons.

data based on the Medical Examiner's records for New York City over

lO-year period. (Adapted from J. Hirsh. Suicide. Mental Hygiene, N.Y.,

959, 43, 516-525. Used by permission.

MIDDLE AGE: VOCATIONAL AND FAMILY ADJUSTMENTS 383

Because many middle-aged people are not re-

alistic about their potentials, they become dis couraged when their achievements fall below their

expectations. As Montagu has put it: "It's a very

hard thing to be an "ordinary Joe," as it were. One is

faced with a great many frustrations and unrealized

ideals and dreams; one has to settle for something far

less than what one had anticipated in first starting

out" (67). When discouraged because their achievements

have fallen below their expectations, it lowers the

motivation of individuals to do what they are capable

of and, as a result, they become underachievers.

Effects on Personality The way in which physical and role changes af.

fect the self-concepts of middle-aged people is the third criterion of how well they are adjusting to mid. dle age. When they are making satistactory adjust. ments, their self-concepts will be positive: they will

feel that they are still useful members of society and that they can still make worthwhile contributions

whether they be familial, social, or vocational. By contrast, poorly adjusted individuals develop neea

tive self-concepts, characterized by feelings of worth lessness and uselessness.

Personality disorganization in middle age is re

lated to poor social and emotional adjustment, much of which stems from poor adjustment in the earlier years. There is little evidence to indicate that middle

age, per se, is responsible for the mental illnesses that

occur at this time. On the other hand, there is ade

quate evidence that those who break under the strain of adjustments in middle age have a history of unre-

solved problems which have interfered with good ad.

justments. The stresses of middle age then prove to be too much for them to cope with, and mental illness

severe enough to require institutionalization may set

in (21,71,92).

Emotional States The second criterion of how well men and

women are adjusting to middle age is their emotional

states or how stressful they are. As Billig and Adams

have pointed out, 'There has been an increasing awareness that middle age can bring anxiety and in-

security" (6). Stress, they explain, may be shown in

many ways, the most common of which are conflicts

with members of the family and a tendency to make

great demands on them; excessive demands by mid-

dle-aged persons on those who work under them; a

glorification of youthful patterns of behavior, espe-

cially as evidenced in sexual relations with younger

people; and intense anxieties.

Middle-aged men and women have also been

found to worry more than younger people. There is

Happiness The fourth criterion of how successfully men

and women are adjusting to middle age is the happi- ness or life satisfaction they experience. Happiness in middle age, as at all ages, comes when the individ- ual's needs and desires at that time are met and sat isfied. People who are well adjusted, in the sense that they are able to satisfy their needs and desires quickly and adequately within the controls and outlets pro- vided by the cultural group with which they are

identified, will be far happier than those who have been unable or who are unwilling to make the essen-

tial adjustments Success in a chosen vocation, which brings

with it prestige, financial rewards, and improved so cial status for the family, goes a long way toward

making middle age a satisfying period of life for men

and helps to compensate for the lack of satisfaction

they may derive from other areas of their lives. or

women, whose lives have usually been centered around the home, satisfaction in middle age depeno

mainly on the success with which they are able to a just to the changes they must make in the homemdn

some evidence that emotional stress is more common

during the early part of middle age than it is during the latter part. This can be explained by the fact that,

during the forties, changes in iving patterns, role

changes, and changes in self-concepts resulting from

physical and role changes generally come upon men

and women suddenly. Although changes are always

difficult and thus are generally accompanied by stress, they are especially disturbing and emotion-

provoking for those who have not made adequate

provision for them (35). By the mid-fifties, most individuals are fairly

well adjusted to middle age and are no longer upset

y it. They have adjusted their roles, their interests, and their activities in accordance with the physical and psychological changes they have undergone. Life then moves along smoothly until the onset of old age

As worries subside during the latter part of middle

age, the individual is calmer and, thus, happier.

384 CHAPTER TWELVE

Total sample

Male Female

Health Standard Self- Relationship with children

Leisure time and social

participation

Marital Occupation of

living relations concept

EIGURE 12-10 The degree of satisfaction middle-aged men and women derive from difterent areas ot their lives varies markedly. (Adapted from

M. P. Hayes and N. Stinnett. Life satisfaction of middle-aged husbands and wives. Journal ot Home Economics, 1971, 63, 669-674. Used by permis-

sion.)

ing role (35). These adjustments are easier if the hus-

band is successful vocationally and the wife is able to enjoy her newtound treedom, rather than being

forced to go to work herself (92).

Figure 12-10 shows how markedly the degree of satisfaction experienced by middle-aged men and women varies (39). Note that women tend to be better satisfied than men and that they derive greater

Chapter Highlights 1. Vocational adjustments of middle-aged men

and women are complicated by such factors as

unfavorable social attitudes, hiring policies, in-

creased use of automation, group work, increas-

ing importance of the role of wives, compulsory retirement, dominance of big business, and ne

cessity for relocation. 2. Vocational adjustment in middle age can be as-

sessed by two criteria-achievement and satis-

faction--with satisfactionn

satisfaction from their marital relations and their chil-

dren than from their occupations and leisure-time

and social activities. Note also that they are reason-

ably well satisfied with their self-concepts, further

Suggesting that they are able to make the good adjust- ment that is essential to happiness. Refer also to Fig-

ure 10-5 which shows how satisfaction with family

life varies at different times during the family-life

cycle. To be happy in middle age, as at all ages, the

usually a contributor to adjustment than

more

important achievement.

3. Middle age has been called the "shrinking circle stage" of family life because the most important

change at this time is a reduction of tamily mem-

bers living under the same root.

4. The "'empty nest period"-a time of radical role

changes for both men and women-is less trau-

matic than is popularly believed though, foor

many women, it requires tar greater adjustment in life patterns than it does for men.

5. Poor sexual adjustments in middle age are due to

many causes. The five most common causes are

differences in the male and the female sex drives; male concern about loss of sexual vigor; in-

creased female interest in sex; female desire to

have one more child; and female initiative in put-

ting a stop to sexual intercourse.

6. There are two new torms of in-law adjustment most middle-aged people must make-adjust ment to their children's spouses and adjustment to the care of each other's aging parents.

person must be realistic and realize that life has its

problems as well as its rewards. If the rewards are

adequate to compensate for the problems, the scale

will be balanced in favor of happiness. As Levine has

pointed out (52):

What the mind loses in alertness, it makes up tor it

in the assurance of reflective thinking. If the mus-

Es grow sensitive to fatigue, they learn to respond

re selectively to stimuli. If the bodily functions

OW Signs of impairment, they flash intermittently

ne amber lights of caution. And if the fires of pas-

SOn are being damped, one comes to prize the

elease from their tyrannical domination.

385MIDDLE AGE: VOCATIONAL AND FAMILY ADJUSTMENTS

7. Middle-aged men and wor 8randparent roles. The five most common are the formal role, the fun-seeking role, the surrogate-

Women play different

parent role, the "reservoir of family wisdom role, and the distant-figure role. 8. Adjustment to singlehood in middle age is more

difficult for women, as a group, than for men, as

a group, because single women, more often than Single men, are expected to assume responsibiy for the care of elderly parents.

. Adjustment to the loss of a spouse is different

when the loss is due to death than when due to

divorce though, in both cases, the adjustment s

more difficult for women than it is for men. T. he most common problems of widowhood are

economic, social, familial, practical, sexual, and

residential. T1. Chances for remarriage after death of a spouse or

divorce grow slimmer with each passing year for

Women, especially those who live in small towns

or rural areas while, for men, chances for remar-

riage are good, regardless of where they live.

12. While adjustment to approaching retirement and approaching old age should be important devel-

opmental tasks for all middle-aged men and

women, they are made more difficult than they

should be because of unfavorable social attitudes

that militate against adequate preparation tor

these tasks. 13. Among the important vocational hazards of mid-

dle age are failure to reach earlier goals, decline

in creativity, boredom, the growing tendency to-

ward "bigness" in business and industry, feelings

of being "trapped" in a job, unemployment, un-

favorable attitudes toward present job, and geo-

graphic mobility in order to advance or to retain

present job. 14. Among the common and most serious marital

hazards in middle age are the necessity for

making role changes, boredom (especially on

the part of women), inability to establish satis

factory relationships with the spouse as a person,

opposition to a child's marriage, sexual malad-

justments, care of an elderly parent, loss of a

spouse, and remarriage.

15. The success with which men and women adjust

to middle age can be assessed by four criteria:

achievements, emotional states, the effects of the

physical and psychological changes on personal

ity, and the degree of satisfaction or happiness

the middle-aged person experiences.

386 CHAPTER TWELVE