Use the ABCDE Strategy to build

resilience.

© Paul T. P. Wong

Life Lesson 9: How do I overcome adversity?

OverviewLife is full of suffering Need to develop a tragic sense of life

Need realistic stress appraisalNeed to understand the Resource-Congruence Model

Frankl’s concept of Tragic OptimismThe ABCDE Intervention

Have a Tragic Sense of Life“In this world you will have trouble.” - Jesus

The first noble truth of Buddhism: Life is full of suffering

Every life is touched by tragedy

Having a tragic sense of life offers you the best preparation for the tragedies of life

A tragic sense of life is an effective inoculation against

tragedies.

What matters most is how you

react to adversity.

3 Common Responses to Adversity

1)Catastrophizing: Creating unnecessary anxieties & suffering

2)Trivializing: Ignoring the real danger & believing in delusions

3)Assessing it rationally: Appraising the situation realistically

Importance of Appraisal Primary appraisal – Is it neutral, beneficial, or harmful?

Secondary appraisal – Is it controllable by self, by others or beyond human control?

Reappraisal – Have I under- or over-estimated my ability to manage the situation?

(As measured by Stress Appraisal Measure)

Resource-Congruence Model

Do I have the needed resources (external & internal)?

Do I have the appropriate coping responses?

If the answer to both is affirmative, then we don’t experience stress

A Case of Exaggerated Appraisal:

The Process of Catastrophizing

Coping with Real Trauma

Religious copingExistential coping Re-telling the storyPracticing tragic optimism

Components of Tragic Optimism (TO)

Acceptance of the bleak realityBelief in the value and meaning of lifeSelf-transcendence (altruism)Faith in God and othersCourage to face adversity

The Power of Acceptance

Accept what cannot be changed

Accept responsibility not for what has happened but for how to cope

Learn to let go in order to move forward

Self-transcendence enhances the well-being of both self and others.

Courage empowers you to expand your hope beyond the walls that confine you.

A Good Example of Tragic Optimism

ABCDE Intervention• Accept and confront reality – the reality principle

• Believe that life is worth living – the faith principle

• Commit to goals and actions – the action principle

• Discover the meaning and significance of self and situations – the Aha! Principle

• Evaluate the above – the self-regulation principle

The Power of Acceptance

The Power of Belief

Commitment = Passion + Action + Persistence

The Joy of Self-Discovery

Learning something new about the self and life

Digging deeper, exploring further, and higher.

Discovering one’s hidden talents and strength.

Discovering the power of faith and spiritual resources.

Grasping the complexities of life and people.

Enjoyment & Evaluation

Savoring small successes and re-assessing one’s progress

•Feeling relief that the worst is over

•Monitoring progress

•Savoring the moments of small success

•Reflecting and reviewing one’s life

•Receiving feedback from others

•Conducting assessments and making adjustments

Growing Stronger through Struggle

Adversity provides a better foundation for life than

prosperity.