Week 3 Academic Writing Tutorial Exercises and Discussion Activities

Activity 1: Questionnaire: How Do You Write a Text?

Instructions: Complete the following questionnaire about the way that you write.

Once you have filled it in, your tutor will ask the class to compare answers and

discuss the various responses.

1. I prefer to plan my written assignments in detail before I start writing.

☐ generally ☐ sometimes ☐ never

2. Once I make a plan I don’t change it.

☐ generally ☐ sometimes ☐ never

3. I make sure each sentence is correct before I write the next sentence.

☐ generally ☐ sometimes ☐ never

4. I think carefully about how each idea fits into the text as a whole.

☐ generally ☐ sometimes ☐ never

5. I make a lot of changes to my texts while I am writing them.

☐ generally ☐ sometimes ☐ never

6. When I am writing, I move back and forth in the text changing things.

☐ generally ☐ sometimes ☐ never

7. When I finish the text, I reread the whole text at least once to check that it’s okay.

☐ generally ☐ sometimes ☐ never

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8. I print my texts out before I read them through them to check what I have written.

☐ generally ☐ sometimes ☐ never

9. I read my texts out loud to hear how they flow and to hear if the text makes

grammatical sense.

☐ generally ☐ sometimes ☐ never

10. When I check my texts, I focus more on language problems (eg grammar,

vocabulary, spelling) than on content problems (eg clarity, organization).

☐ generally ☐ sometimes ☐ never

Extra question for students for whom English is not their first language

11. I write words and/or sentences in my first language first and then translate them

into English.

☐ generally ☐ sometimes ☐ never

Any general comments about the way that you write that are not covered by the

questions above?

Adapted from: Paltridge, B. et al (2009). Teaching Academic Writing: An Introduction for Teachers of

Second Language Writers Ann Arbor: University of Michigan Press

Activity 2: Achieving the right level of formality

Academic writing is, by convention, more formal than conversational in tone. To achieve this, you should aim to choose words and expressions which more precisely

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communicate your ideas. However, this does not mean that you should choose longwinded, wordy expressions just because you think that it will make you sound impressive. You should aim for clear, succinct prose. In particular, don’t use words whose meanings you are unsure of.

A. Revise the following example, choose a more relevant and specific word to replace the colloquial expression. The first one is done for you.

Informal FormalThe common owl is active at night. The common owl is nocturnal

Lots of job loss is just one thing resulting from automation.

B. Avoid using phrasal verbs such as 'get up', 'put into', 'find out' that are often used in spoken English. Replace these verbs with more formal single verbs such as 'rise', 'contribute' and 'discover'; for example:

Informal FormalResearchers looked at the way strain builds up round a geological fault.Technology companies got together with stockbroking firms in order to dominate internet trading.

C. Make sure the description you provide is as specific as possible.

Look at the underlined words and phrases to see the differences in word choice in the following example. The exactness of the description has been increased by including more specific adjective (fiscal) as well as additional descriptive words (highlighted). Do the following example on your own (invent necessary details).

Informal FormalThe government has made progress in economic policy.

The Australian Government has made considerable progress in implementing fiscal policy nationwide.

One of the bad aspects of chemotherapy is the side effects.

D. Also avoid using adverbs such as 'really', 'very', 'just'. Suggest several alternatives for the following.

Informal Formal

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It caused a really big reaction.

E. In this exercise think about formalising the WORDS you use to express the point. The words that may be too informal are underlined. Revise the passage by replacing these words with those that you think will increase the academic tone of the passage. Several of the alternatives may be correct.

Faced with the grim financial reality, both groups agreed that the talks about the company's efficiency problems had achieved a very good result. Advice from outside said the company could bring about big change by increasing the amount of goods produced per hour. The unions accepted this comment but suggested the gains would be reached faster if management came up with better policies as well as buying better equipment. Management said spending on equipment had gone up by 15% during the 1990s but they agreed to look into this issue. The reaction to the talks was pretty good and has resulted in everyone getting on better at work.

Activity 3: Writing well constructed paragraphs

A. Divide the following text into paragraphs. Remember that each paragraph should develop a particular theme.

How to stop yourself snoring.

Snoring is caused when the airway at the back of the nose and throat becomes partially obstructed. This is usually due to the loosening of the surrounding oropharyngeal muscles, but the reasons why this should occur are varied. The most common are smoking, obesity and the consumption of relaxants such as alcohol and sleeping pills. As with any common ailment, there are a host of "miracle" cures advertised - but you should first try a few simple steps to see if you can halt the snoring before adopting more drastic measures. Lifestyle changes can be the most effective. If you are overweight, a loss of weight will help to reduce the pressure on your neck. You should also stop smoking and try not to drink alcohol at least four hours before you go to bed. Beyond this, try to change your regular sleeping position. Raise the head of your bed with a brick, or tie something uncomfortable into the back of your pyjamas to encourage you to sleep on your side. Both of these will help to alter the angle of your throat as you sleep, and may thus make breathing easier for you. It is also important to keep your nasal passage clear and unblocked. Allergies, colds and hay fever can temporarily cause you to snore; nasal decongestants may help, but you are not advised to use such remedies for long periods. Nasal strips, as worn by sportspeople, have been proven to reduce nasal airway resistance by up to 30 per cent, so consider these as a long-term alternative. If this fails, then you may wish to look at the varied snoring aids that are on the market. They range from neck collars that stop your neck tilting, through to mandibular-advancement devices (such as gumshields) which reduce upper airway

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resistance, and tongue-retaining devices. You can also buy essential-oil products that are added to warm water and infused or consumed before bedtime. They claim to tone up your palate and unblock your nasal passage. Finally, if your symptoms persist, visit your GP or contact the British Snoring and Sleep Apnoea Association (01737 557 997) for advice. If you do not, your partner might.

B. Recognising topic sentences

Step 1: Decide which of the following sentences is the topic sentence of the paragraph

Step 2: Write TS on the line next to that sentence

Step 3: Decide the order of the supporting sentences and number them SS1, SS2 etc

Para 1  

  a. It enables customers to do several banking transactions 24 hours a day

  b. In addition, a customer can transfer funds between accounts or get a cash advance on a credit card.

  c. An automated teller machine (ATM) is a convenient miniature bank.

  d. For example, a customer can use an ATM to deposit money and withdraw a limited amount of cash.

Para 2  

  a. After an attack by a great white, 462 stitches were required to sew up an Australian scuba diver.

  b. With their razor-sharp teeth and strong jaws, great white sharks are very dangerous

  c. Nevertheless, one did just that near a public beach in Australia in 1985.

  d. Even when they attack humans, however, great whites do not usually eat them.

  e. It bit in half and totally devoured a young female swimmer.

  f. Great whites do not usually attack humans, but when they do, they always cause serious injury and even death.

Para 3  

  a. Another important change was that people had the freedom to live work wherever they wanted.

  b. The earliest significant change was for farming families, who were no longer isolated.

 c. The final major change brought about by the automobile was the building of superhighways, suburbs, huge shopping centres, and many theme parks such as Disneyworld in Florida.

  d. The automobile revolutionised the American way of life.  e. The automobile enabled them to drive to towns and cities comfortably

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and conveniently.

  f. In fact, people could work in a busy metropolitan city and drive home to the quiet suburbs.

C. Write a good topic sentence in the space provided.

Paragraph 1

Americans relaxing at home, for example, may put on 'kimonos', which is a Japanese word. Americans who live in a warm climate may take an afternoon 'siesta' on an outdoor 'patio' without even realising that these are Spanish words. In their gardens, they may enjoy the fragrance of 'jasmine' flowers, a word that came into English from Persian. They may even relax on a 'chaise longue' while sipping a drink made from 'vodka', words of French and Russian origin respectively.

 Paragraph 2 

In European universities, students are not required to attend classes. In fact, professors in Germany generally do not know the names of the students enrolled in their courses. In the United States, however, students are required to attend all classes and may be penalised if they don't. Furthermore, in the European system, there is usually just one comprehensive examination at the end of the students' entire four or five years of study. In the American system, on the other hand, there are usually numerous quizzes, tests, and homework assignments, and there is almost always a final examination in each course at the end of the semester.

 

Paragraph 3For example, the Eskimos, living in a treeless region of snow and ice, sometimes build temporary homes out of thick blocks of ice. People who live in deserts, on the other hand, use the most available material, mud or clay, which provides good insulation from the heat. In Northern Europe, Russia and other areas of the world where forests are plentiful, people usually construct their homes out of wood. In the islands of the South Pacific, where there is a plentiful supply of bamboo and palm, people use these tough, fibrous plants to build their homes.

D. Writing concluding sentences. Follow the steps listed and write a good concluding sentence in the space provided.

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Step 1: Underline the topic sentence in each paragraph

Step 2: Determine the main idea of each paragraph

Step 3: Begin each concluding sentence with an end-of-paragraph signal (examples shown earlier).

Paragraph 1You can be a good conversationalist by being a good listener. When you are conversing with someone, pay close attention to the speaker's words while looking at his or her face. Show your interest by smiling and/or nodding. Furthermore, don't interrupt while someone is speaking; it is impolite to do so. If you have a good story, wait until after the speaker is finished. Also, watch your body language; it can affect your communication whether you are the speaker or the listener. For instance, don't sit slumped in a chair or make nervous hand and foot movements. Be relaxed and bend your body slightly forward to show interest in the person and the conversation.

 

 

Paragraph 2Modern communication technology is driving workers in the corporate world crazy. They feel buried under the large number of messages they receive daily. In addition to telephone calls, office workers receive dozens of email and voicemail messages daily. In one company in fact, managers receive an average of 100 messages a day. Because they don't have enough time to respond to these messages during office hours, it is common for them to do so in the evenings or on weekends at home.

 

Activity 4: Compare journalistic vs academic styleRead through the following two articles. The first is the abstract of a research report on the impact on smacking on children’s IQ, the second is the newspaper summary of the research. What are the differences in style (words used, evidence cited, style) and substance? Give examples to support your response. What does this tell you about the differences in style between journalistic reporting and academic writing?

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Comments:

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Activity 5: How good is your punctuation?

Correct the punctuation in the following passage. Look for errors in capitalisation,

use of apostrophes, commas, parentheses, hyphens etc.

repetitive strain injury rsi has become an expensive legacy of new office technology

it has been the major cause of workers compensation claims and the numbers of

these claims are outstripping those for other work related injuries

claire britten her case was reported in the journal working and health was awarded

full compensation the presiding magistrate mr j king expressed his findings as

follows

i am sure that had her employers redland automatics acted as soon as ms britton

reported her symptoms her employment in a changed occupation may well have

shortened the period of her compensation

the employers clearly knew the nature of her condition and how it had come about

nevertheless they refused to place her in different employment

a latter issue of the same magazine which had reported claires case contained a

report by an occupational health physician it stated that the following factors had

contributed to the explosion of this problem ergonomic deficiencies in workplace

design excessive workloads due to insufficient staffing levels and stress including

work practices such as the requirement that telephonists not waste time by using any

courtesy expressions when dealing with enquiries

according to the physician ergonomic furniture alone will not solve the problem

worker education job rotation modification of work practices and reduction of stress

in the work environment all of these contribute to solution to the problem

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