NEWCASTLE UNITED FANZINE - THE ALTERNATIVE VIEW - 2015/16 SEASON

15/16

ISSUE 124

FEBRUARY 2016

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EDITOR: Michael Martin

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ART & DESIGN:

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Editorial.................................................... pg4

TBAWE...................................................... pg6

Introduction:AndrosTownsend...... pg10

JonShelvey-OneWayorAnother!.. pg14

Pavelandme......................................... pg16

Introduction:HenrySaivet............... pg20

Friendsacrossthewater.................... pg24

He’sthekeeper!.................................... pg26

Geordieshere,Geordiesthere......... pg28

Branded:Adidas..................................... pg32

JimmyHillfootballman.................... pg36

Newsfromnowhere........................... pg40

Drumsandwires................................... pg44

Feeleverybeat...................................... pg47

AkickaboutwithRobLee................ pg54

Cartoons.................................................. pg57

Introduction:JonjoShelley............... pg58

Moneyandshare................................. pg62

ORei......................................................... pg66

Goingdown?......................................... pg74

Coulda,woulda,shoulda................... pg78

Postcardsfromtheedge................... pg82

60secondseason................................ pg84

Piechartsandbadges........................ pg86

Pavel,PavelSrnicek............................. pg90

Windows2016..................................... pg96

Bowie-alife......................................... pg98

TheEnd...................................................pg102

Welcome to tf 124.

So, here we are in andaroundtherelegationspots,whichisprettymuchwherewe have been throughoutthe season and where wewere last May. For me,we are where we are onmerit. Sincethe last issuewas published we’ve hadsomedecentperformances,some woeful ones andas we head into the finalstraight for this season allwehavetosavourisagrimbattle against relegation.The pre-season ambitionsas articulated byCharnleythattheclubwastargetinga top eight finish and agood go at the Cups arelaughable given what wehavewitnessedthroughout2015/16.

Thingshavebeendifferentthis season however. FormuchofAshley’stenurewe

havebemoanedhislackofinvestment in the squad.It is arguable the positionwe find ourselves in nowisdirectlyasaresultofthecumulative impact of thatlack of investment overan extended period. Forall thatwecannotdisputewhat has been reportedashavingbeen invested inplayers over the last yearand a bit. The analysis ofAshley’sUnitednowshiftsfromlackofinvestmenttoquestioninghowprudentlyclubmoneyhasbeenspentand the spotlight fallsuponCharnleyandCarr inparticular.

Forroughly£25mbetweenthem,ThauvinandCabellacame and delivered little.Mitrovic at £12m hasshown in flashes whatCarr valued in him. Thereare others – De Jong and

Riviere who have yet todemonstrate anythingmuch to suggest theycanbe assets of NewcastleUnited FC. These areplayers who have beenscoutedextensivelybyCarrbutfromtheverymomenttheycrossedthewhite-lineinthePremierLeaguetheyhaveneverreallyconvinced.Ofcoursetherehavebeensuccesses too – Janmaat ,Mbemba,Perez,Wiljandumand Sissoko are goodplayers (there are otherswho have come and gonetoo–Cabaye,Ba,Debuchy)butwhenplacedalongsideMarveaux,Santon,Obertan,Goufrann, Mbwia therearemoremisses thanhits.Money and lots of it isbeing wasted.There is thewhole separate issue ofHatemBenArfaaswell.

Thelatesttransferwindow

saw the club shop in thedomesticmarketandbringin Shelvey and Townsend.On initial showings theylook to be very positiveacquisitions and obviouslyit’s to be hoped serve theclub for many years andreach their full potentialhere. It is good to seeUnited release itself froma strait-jacket of its ownmaking in regards to itsrecruitmentpolicy.

However, the prioritypositions the club hasneeded to recruit for atleast3-4seasonsremain.

AttheendofthisseasonIunderstand bothColo andS.Taylor will leave United.That will leave us withDummett, Lascelles andMbemba as our availablecentraldefenders.There’snowayCurtisGoodewilleverkick a ball in the Premier

editorial tf 124 February 2016editor@true-faith.co.uk @tfeditor1892

www.true-faith.co.uktf 4

League. So, no matterwhat division we happento be in next season, wehavetothemarketfortwocentre-halves and at leastonewithsomepedigreetoreplace Colo in particular.It’s my opinion, havingwatchedSanton labouronhis wrong side that we’velacked a proper left-backsinceEnrique left theclub.Theclub’sfailuretorecruitaleft-backinJanuaryplacesa big question over thewholeCarr-Charnleyaxis.

But it’s in attack wherewe are sorely lacking agood, proven goal-scorer.United appeared to belinked to several strikerswithamassiveamountofmoney offered for WestBrom’s Saido Berahinofailing to tempt theBaggies Chairman JeremyPeace. Charlie Austin onthe other hand moved toSouthampton for £4m.Ultimately however, theclubfailedtogettheplayerthey have needed sinceDemba Ba hit the roadto Chelsea three seasonsago and so we were leftwith Seydou Doumbia onloan from Roma who hasbeenvariouslydescribedasfantasticbusinessorapoorconsolation prize. We aregoing tohave towaitandseeonthatone.

Of course how the teamhas been set up is vital.We’veplayedreallywellonoccasion and in particular

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recently were full valueagainst West Ham andWestBromatapurringSJP.Butwe’vebeenlargelydireaway from SJP on far toomany occasions. McClarenseems incapableofsettingthe teamupon its travelsand we look confused,frightened and vulnerabletoooften.Overtheseasonthe Head Coach has flip-floppedwithvarioustacticsand formations but themost successful for me isonewhereweplayonthefront foot and attack. Bigquestions remain aboutMcClarenandI’llbehonesthe’sdonelittletoconvinceme he should last longerthan this season at themost but if he goes soshould Charnley and Carrwhoareas responsible forthisdisgraceofaseasonas

the man they brought tocoachtheplayers.

More positively, thepopularity of this daftwee fanzine goes fromstrength to strength. I amstaggered by the numbersdownloading and readingtruefaithandIknowIkeeprepeating this but one ofthe best decisions we’veever made has been toembrace the opportunitiesaffordedbythedigitalage.It’snohollowboasttosaytruefaithisthemostwidelyreadfanzineintheUKanditiscertainlythenumberoneNewcastle United Fanzineand the same applies toourpodcastandnewsletter.Wearehappytobendtheknee to the peerless nufc.comasthegotoplaceforproper,click-bait-freenews

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onourclub.Butsoshould

the“proper”mediatoo.

There is a tsunami of

content available via the

internet but we believe

well-written, original

pieces of the type we’ve

beenproviding since1999

but now with added bells

and whistles are still far

more valued by you all

thanregurgitated,chopped

up crap to drive clicks

and in turn advertising.

That’s not our game and

we’ll remain committed

to the ethics of fanzines

but take advantage of the

technologicalopportunities

ofthemodernera–justas

thismovementalwayshas

done.

Weallhopeyouenjoythis

issue.

Keep On, Keepin’ On…

We’ve played really well on occasion and in particular recently were full value against West Ham and West Brom at a purring SJP. But we’ve been largely dire away from SJP on far too many occasions.

thru black & white eyesDec 11th - McClarenreckons that the only wayisupfollowingthebonkerswin against Liverpool andthat we ‘have enough’not to battle relegationthis season. Time will tellbut Spurs away looks likea daunting prospect. Nohome defeats this seasonand the only game theylost was an opening daydefeat against an abjectManchester United whodidn’tactuallyhavea shotagainstthem.Thatsoundslike something NewcastleUnited would do. Ourrecentrecordintheleagueat White Hart is good,oddly. It’s odd as we’rethe worst statistical awaysideintheleaguefromtheever present teams sincepromotion in 2010. Themassive caveat was theLeague Cup quarter lastyearwhichI’mjustfinishingcounsellingfor.

Dec 13th -Hahahahahahawhat a ridiculous win.

Didn’t really deserve to gobehind, and we showedsome attacking intent.CisseplayedwellandMitroandPerezareMILESbetterfromthebenchcomingonas impactplayers. Wegetdayslikethissorarely.Ontelly,infrontofthenation.Itdoesn’tnormallyhappentoNewcastleUnited.Itdid.Getin

Dec 16th - Fair play toMcLaren. He’s had a raregoodweekortwoasUnitedboss. He’s not gettingcarriedawayandisadvisingthatthere’sneveracrisisfarawayatNewcastleUnited.He’s spot on. The nextrun of games in winnablestarting withAstonVile athome – the biggest gameoftheseason.Don’tmessitup.Vileareterrible.

Dec 18th - If you’re notsure about why we wantto smashVile somuch– Iwroteareminder,here.

Dec 19th -Sigh.

Dec 20th -Yesterdaywasapileofwank. WedrankalldaybeforehandasIwantedto celebrate United’scontinued good form andthe ruin of the worst club,withtheworst fans, intheworstplace–intheworld.InsteadVilewerethebettersideinthesecondhalf.SiemDeJongman.Whatajokeofamiss.20downandIcould be sat onChristmasdaywatchingtherepeatofthat game over and overaswegoon to score5or6.Instead,wefaceEvertonandWestBrom–6and8points ahead of us in theleague. Cisse’s injury looksbad.Mitroisagoodplayer–Ithinkhe’llbegreat.He

isn’t a senior striker. Cisseistheseniorstrikerandhisrestoration to the starting11 has coincided with anupturn in fortunes. Hedoesn’t miss sitters either.Weneedhim.

Dec 22nd -Attentionturnsto January as the strikingsituation remains severe.Confirmation Cisse is setfor(another)lengthybreakistoughtotake. Riviere isnot good enough and notfit, so we go into Evertonwithout a striker on thebench. I don’t think anyother Premier League clubis as badly equipped upfrontasweare. Thenexttwogamesaremassive.

Dec 26th - One down,one to go. These ‘crucial’two games begin with anabsolute sucker punchwhichtheseasonmayneverrecoverfrom.93rdminute.

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It’s poor from Elliot. He’sproved me wrong by theway. He is good enoughtoplayinthisleague.He’sso slow off his line andponderous when the ballisintheair.He’scostusapoint,buthe’swonusmorethan he’s lost. One goalagainst two of the worstdefencesintheleagueinthelast week. Relegation stuff.McClarenwillbedoinghisnutwithMitro.Two sittersmissed – one so easy toscoreIcouldhaveknockeditin.We’redrawinggameswe should win and losinggamesweshoulddraw.It’sallvery2009.

Dec 28th -Farce.

Dec 29th - That wasjust rubbish. McClarenhas come out with guff,again, saying we deservedsomething. Wewereabitunlucky. Should have hadapen,probablydidenoughtoscoreASINGLEgoal,butthat’s it. McClaren is adinosaur.Stuckinthepast.Bournemouthmisschancesforfunbuttheycreate7or8ofthemagame.McClarenthinks having two shots agame, and missing one ofthem as sitters is enough.

It’snot.Thisisamanwho’sBoro sides scored just 12goals in 19 away gamesin TWO seperate seasons.He’ll take us down. Onepoint from Vile, EvertonandWestBromwhoareallbottom8.Pathetic.

Jan 1st - A new year.NewcastleUnitedwonjustseven games from 38 in2015.Goodriddance.

Jan 2nd - This is gettingridiculous.Playedwell,gotbeat.WhatdidIsayaboutlosing games you shoulddraw? We could havewon this game arguably.Arsenal prosper yet again.Steve isdelightedwiththeperformance. I’ve seenUnited play far worse andwin, but on the run we’reon–itdoesn’tmatter.Wehave less than a point agameaftermorethanhalfa season. That’s utterlydisgraceful.Nooneseemstopanicking.Alotofnoisesaboutincomingplayers.It’sa massive January. We’regoingdownatthemoment.Wecan’tscore.Weneedacentralmidfielderwhocanpasstheball,afastwingerand most importantlya centre half with PM

experience and a strikerwith the same. I’m notholdingmybreath.

Jan 9th -Out the FaCup.AGAIN. Hard tie, awayfromhometoaPremside.At least he played a fullstrength side. 8th and acup seems a long way off,Steve.

Jan 12th -Asigning!Areal,Premier League signing.Not from France (thoughapparently there’s a ladcominginfromtheFrenchleague) but from England.An international no less.Shelvey signs for £12million and Henry Saivetsignsforaround£5millionfrom Bordeuax. He playseverypositiononthepitchapparently. Well done allinvolvedattheclub.Noneof you should be involvedin a club this size but atleast something has beendoneaboutnothavinganycentral midfielders at theclub. Shelvey is a brilliantplayer. Often frustratingthough, his genius can bemaskedmymediocrity,butit’s there. I hope sectionsof the support don’t getonhisbackforacoupleofmisplaced passes. There’s

alsoagametonight.

Jan 13th - Last night was good. The first halfperformancewasdire.Themedia are full of patteraboutManUtdbeing‘back’as an attacking threat.They’re absolutely notback. A competent sidewould have stuck 4 or 5pastUnitedinthefirsthalf,instead the team fromManchester only got two.The second half was verygood. Great savebyElliotat32tokeepusinit.ThatmakesupforEvertonrightthere. Dummet. What ahit. Huge deflection. Evenbetter. We need to beatWestHamthough,who’vewon at Bournemouthtonightandareflying. It’llbe tough. We can’t startplaying football on 40minutes against them andexpecttowinthegame.

Jan 16th -JesusChristwhatwasTHAT.Well,immenselyenjoyable.It’sthefirsttimeUnitedhaveplayedproperlywell at home since thewin over Chelsea in early2013 after we signed alltheladsfromFrance.Eversince then it’s been poorgamesorcounterattacking

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football. West Ham aregenuinelythefifthbestsidein England and we madethemlookaverageforlongspells

Jan 17th - Transferspeculation season hasgonewellintooverdrive.Allsorts of patter about whowe’re‘tryingtosign’.Austinhas gone to Southamptonfor £4 million. It’s a steal.He never wanted to be aNewcastle United player,apparently for familyreasons. Fair play to him– no blame attached tothe club on that. If theyfail to sign a replacementhowever…..

Jan 19th - Saido BerahinoofWestBromseemstobetheonetheclubarenailingtheir colours to. I can’tsee West Brom selling toa potential relegation rival,butthenagainSwanseadid.Isincerelyhopetheclubdowhatever they need to do

togettheirmanasanother‘Lacazette’stylechasetheyknew they’d never win,wouldbemostdispleasing.

Jan 23rd - Another awaydefeatthistimeatWatford.Our third defeat of theseason to them. SteveMcClaren’s black n whitearmy.

Jan 25th - I can’t get myhead around how goodwe were against WestHam, and then McClarenchanging things like that.Whatwashe thinking? Ishethick?Thefirstgenuinelygood performance of histenureandRolandoAaronsisplayedatwingback,nextgame? Another defeatthough.Damaging.

Jan 26th - AndrosTownsendsigns.Good.Pacyanddirect.Tallandlean.Heisn’twhatNewcastleUnitedhasbeenover the past three years,so that’s good. Another

England international aswell. I need to lie down.This isgoodfromtheclub.Big money. Good playerstendtocostyouafewquid.Still, need that CF, LB andCB...

Jan 29th - No gamethis weekend so loads oftransfer speculation. Asidefrom Berahino loads ofspeculation about lads I’venever heard of coming in.McClaren is tetchy whenasked about a strikercomingin–thesignsaren’tgood.

Feb 1st - We don’t getour man fromWest Brom.Neverstoodachance.Wetake a lad called Doumbiaonloan.I’mnotthatgoodat names so the correctspelling of his namemaybe‘GAMBLE’ but timewill tell. For fucks sake.Again.Charnleycannotdoanything right. Apparentlyit tookAshley to call Levy

to sort out Townsend.

Howembarrassing is that?

Having to get your boss

to speak to your equal at

another club as he won’t

deal with you. Come to

think of it Charnley is like

ashorterLevy,worseathis

job. Chances arewe’ll get

relegatednow.Wecannot

score away from home.

McClaren is probably

fuming, rightly so. Let’s

see how he reacts against

Everton.

Fed 3rd - He reacts by

throwing the game. Of

course that’s not true but

I’dratherthinkofitlikethat

than the fact he had 10

days to prepare for it, and

churned outTHAT. Going

down with this man in

charge!

ALEX HURST - FOLLOW

ALEX ON @tfalex1892

thru black & white eyes

For more information or to donate online please visit www.sirbobbyrobsonfoundation.org.uk

Or send a cheque to The Sir Bobby Robson foundation, Room 203, Cheviot Court, Freeman Hospital, Newcastle upon Tyne NE7 7DN. Newcastle upon Tyne Hospitals NHS Charity (Reg. 1057213)

Let’s tackle cancer!Make a donation today. Click here.

“Wemayhavethecartfinancially,butwenowneedtoboltthehorseson”;MikeAshely,May24th2015.NewcastleUnitedfoundthemselves18thinthePremierLeague,withtheseriousthreatofrelegationloomingovertheirheads.

Introduction:

ANDROSTOWNSEND

September 1st, 2015, andNewcastle United spenta total rumoured outlayof almost £50 millionpounds. Not a singleproven Premier Leagueplayerthroughthedoor,allforeignimportsbarringthelittle known Ivan Toney,signed from League TwooutfitNorthamptonTown.

January 1st, 2016,Newcastle United findthemselves 18th in thePremier League, with theseriousthreatofrelegationloomingovertheirheads.Itallsoundsalltoofamiliar.

January 31st, 2016, andNewcastleUnitedhavesofarspentatotalrumouredoutlay of almost £30million pounds. Twoproven Premier Leagueplayers through the door,bothEnglish,withanotherfaceinSaidoBerahinoalsopotentiallysettoarriveatStJames.Itallsoundstoogoodtobetrue.

MikeAshley,inallfairness,hasstucktohiswordthisseason regarding financialinput into NewcastleUnited, a club so starvedofinvestment,it’sbecomesomewhat rotted to thecore.Playershavecomein(and,inFlaurianThauvan’scase,swiftlygone),yetwestill find ourselves facing

LIAM NORRIS

down the barrel of agun set to shoot us withanother painful season ofChampionshipfootball.

How a club who spentalmost £50 million onplayers in the summercontinues to find itselfin a desperate, doggedrelegation scrap sixmonthslaterissomewhatunbelievable.

However,the£12mspenton Tottenham outcastAndros Townsend maywell representthe biggestchange ofd i r e c t i o nat the clubsince thei l l - f a t e d

tf 10 www.true-faith.co.uk

day Mike Ashley tookthe keys to St James offFreddyShepardwaybackin2007.

The change can bedefined in three words.Proven.British.Talent.

If Mike Ashely is honestwhen he says he has nosay in transfers, then afar bigger proportionof blame must beattributed towards chiefscout Graham Carr. Forevery Yohan Cabaye,Moussa Sissoko andGiniWjinaldum, is a lengthylist of expensive, foreignflopsfeaturingnightmare-inducing names such asYoan Gouffran, RemyCabellaandSiemdeJong.

However,withthesigningof Townsend, it seemsthere’s been a massiveshift in focus at theclub. I always asked thequestion ‘why have wespent £12m of FlaurianThauvan and RemyCabella, when players

of better, proven, Britishqualityareoutthereatasimilarprice?’

WhatyoucanguaranteewithTownsendisaplayerhungry to prove justwhat he can do on aregular basis, in front ofa manager, and fan basewho are willing to givehimtimetoshowushowmuchtalenthereallyhas.

Theboyhashisadmirers,myselfincluded.IthoughthisperformancesatSpurswereexciting,even ifhisendproductattimeswaslacking.Buthe’sonly24,andhasneverbeengivena proper run in a teamto improve on what isalready a very talentedandgiftedgame.Theendproduct will come withthe right training andencouragement.

He’s featured in Englandgamestoo,andimpressedon that stage too. Sincehis debut in 2013, he’sfeatured in ten games,

scored in three of them,andshownhecanmix itwith the best players intheEnglandsetup.Ifhe’sgoodenoughforEngland,he’s sure as hell goodenough for NewcastleUnited.

Sure,thequestioncanbeasked ‘where will he fitintoamidfieldwhichnowfeatures Jonjo Shelvey,Moussa Sissoko, GiniWjilandum, Henri SaivetANDJackColback?’

Its midfield packed withdecent players- a starkcontrast to the muchlamented front and backof the Magpies startingeleven.

However,formeatleast,the answer is obvious-he HAS to start. Whatwe lack,andhave lackedarguablysinceHatemBenArfa, is a thoroughbredwinger-andinallhonesty,BenArfawashardlywhatyou’dcallconsistent.

Since his debut in 2013, he’s featured in ten games, scored in three of them, and shown he can mix it with the best players in the England set up. If he’s good enough for England, he’s sure as hell good enough for Newcastle United.

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In Mitrovic we have apowerhouse striker, aplayer who can hold theballupwithease,hasthepotential to be lethal inthe air, and brings otherfront lying players intoplay. So far this seasonwe’ve been forced toplay too direct at times,not really being able toutilisehisabilityintheairdirectlyinfrontofgoal.

With the addition ofShelvey, we now have aCabaye-esque creativemidfielder. In Townsend,we now have a properwinger on our hands togive us more directionand options in gettingtheball into theboxandultimatelyscoregoals.

Furthermore, TownsendcouldwellrevealwhetherMitrovic is going to trulycomegoodhere,whichisarguablythemostdifficultthing to fathom so farthis season.The Serb hastalent without doubt,and the majority of hisperformances have beenmassively encouraging.However, there’s onerather damning problemforourmarqueefrontlinesigning - goals, or rather,thelackofthem.

Townsend will get balls

intothebox,whileShelveywillpingballstohimfromnowhere- much like hisdevastatingly effectivedebut against WestHam earlier in January.That brought goals, andaddingTownsendintotheequation is only going tocreatemore.

There is hope, for now,that after a reasonablysatisfyingJanuarytransferwindow Newcastle canstay up.With the moneythat has been spent, itshouldbecomfortable.

Alotofhope,expectationand responsibility liesat Andros Townsend’sdoorstep now. If not ona professional level, thenonapersonal level,asheclaims to be in the bestshape of his life, and hasalways had bags of self-belief. The onus is firmlyon him to prove hispotential right, and makealatebreakforaboardingpassonRoyHodgson’stripto France in the SummerfortheEuros.

However, the spotlightis firmly on you, SteveMcClaren. Ashley hasinvested,CarrandcohaveboughtBritish,andwenowhave a squad that shouldstayup-andwithease.

Steve McClaren, you nowCANNOT afford to fail asyoudidsoatDerby,Forestand England. Money hasbeen spent by the bucketload- albeit in the wrongplacesforsolong,butthathas changed this winter.There is no hiding place,

we don’t do brollies upin Newcastle, and theresureashellisn’tanymoreexcuses for continueddisappointment no more.Theball,quiteliterally,isinyourcourt,MrMcClaren.

In Townsend, we now have a proper winger on our hands to give us more direction and options in getting the ball into the box and ultimately score goals

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JonjoShelveydividedfansatSwanseaCityfortheentiretyofhistwoandahalfyearstayattheLiberty.Manyfansdidn’tevenwanthiminthefirstplace,Ithoughbelievedat£5mhecouldhaverealpotentialanditwasagoodpieceofbusinessbyMichaelLaudrup.

On his day he can befantastic, you’ve alreadyseenfirst-handinyourwinagainstWestHamthathelovestoplaytheambitiouspass andwhen they comeoff it’sa joy tobehold.Hecanbeequallydeadlywhenshootingfromtwentyyards.

Howeverhecanalsohaveoffdaysandwhenthoselongrangepassesdon’tcomeoff(andfrequentlytheydon’t)he fails to recognise thatsometimes the simple ballcanbemoreeffectivethantheambitiousone.Hecanhavearushofbloodtothehead as well and commit

silly fouls and is prone totheoddredcard.Heisalsovery inconsistent, capableofdoingsomethingbrilliantone minute and awful thenext.

IftherewaseveronegametobackupwhatI’vejustsaiditwouldbewhenhisformerclub Liverpool visitedus inSeptember2013.Hescoredafter just two minutesby dribbling into the box,producing a nice turn toopen up space beforescoring with a brilliant leftfooted shot. The Swansfans were still celebratingwhen he received the ball

just outside his own boxand went to slot it backto MichelVorm and failedto notice Daniel Sturridgelurking beyond the lastmanwhoacceptedthegiftto level the score just twominuteslater.

Heendedhisfirstcampaignwithsixgoalsinthirtytwogames.Agoodreturnforhisfirstyearofregularfootballin the Premier League andit includedoneofthebeststrikesI’veeverseen–a40yardhalfvolleyathometoAstonVilla.

In2014/5hedidn’tstartso well and picked

JONJOSHELVEYOne Way or Another!

STEVE CARROLLEditor of Swansea City Fanzine, Swansea Oh Swansea.

follow @StevenSOS1987

sosfanzine.com

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www.true-faith.co.uk tf 15

upfivebookingsinthefirstsevengames,manyofthemfor dull things like kickingtheballaway.Hewasthensent off for two yellowsat Everton and received aretrospective ban after anelbow on Adam Lallanaat Liverpool which causedGarry Monk to hang himouttodryinthepress.

This public dressing downseemed to work though,and he was a stand-outperformer in the secondhalf of the campaign, hemanaged to cut out someofthoseneedlessbookingsand although he didn’tscoreasmanyasheshouldhave he was adding somevitalassiststohisgameandwas rewarded with a newcontractinthesummer.

Thisseasonhewasstarted

like a house on fire, aparticularhighlightwashisassist for Bafetimbi Gomisin the 2-0 win over theMagpiesinAugust.Howeverlikemanysincethenhehasfailed to perform and thatis why Swansea have onlywon twice since the firstfourgames.Theclubneededto raise funds to sign astrikertheysobadlyneededand obviously decidedthat Shelvey was a playerwe could do without.Theplayer also revealed in hisunveiling press conferenceoneortwothingswentonbehind the scenes whichmayhavealsocontributedtothedecision.

In theory more thandoublingyourmoneyonaplayerwhohasn’timproveda great deal in two and ahalfyearsisgoodbusiness.

But I thinkwe’ve takenanunnecessary risk selling toa direct relegation rival. Ifhecanrealisehispotentialthen the chances of youstaying up at our expensewill increase considerably.Swansea should have triedto sell him to a team inmid-tableifpossible.

From Newcastle’s point ofviewit’salsoarisk;£12misalotforaplayerwhomaynever become the finishedarticle. But then again ifSteveMcClarencanimprovehis consistency and curbhisrashtendenciesitcouldbe a master-stroke. In thelong termhewill probablydivideyourfanbase,butifin the short termhehelpskeepyouupI’msuretherewillbenocomplaintsatStJames’Park.

But I think we’ve taken an unnecessary risk selling to a direct relegation rival. If he can realise his potential then the chances of you staying up at our expense will increase considerably.

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Pavel and Me

You’llhavetoforgivethetitleofthis,asitgivestheimpressionthatIknewPavelpersonally.

ThatIdidn’tismostdefinitelyasadthingforme,asIlistentoandreadtributespaidbyformercolleaguesandfriends.Itappearsthathewasfuntobearound,enjoyedalaugh,andwas,intrueGeordieterms,a‘cannylad’.

Lofty

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What I’d like to do is givean account of two of myown brief meetings withone of the most popularblokesevertorepresentmyfootball club, and one ofmy own all time favouriteplayers.He’sonacannylistwithShearerandBeardsley!I think they both confirmthefeelingsexpressedbysomanyothersabouthimasaperson.

MyfirstexperienceofPavelwas back in around 1992or1993. Iwasworking fortheNorthEastAmbulanceService at the time, takingpatientstoandfromhospitalappointmentsinNewcastle.Aprettymundanedaywasunfolding on the way tothe RVI to be honest, butit was brightened when Ispotted Pavel standing in

thecarparkattheoldA&Eentranceforsomereason.

Imustadmit tohavingnoregardforfellowroadusersor the passengers in myambulanceat thispoint intimeasthedangerinherentin slammingon thebrakesseemed not to register.Completely star struck, Imanagedtowinddownthewindow(noleccywindowsin those days man) andstutterasentenceaskingifhewasalright.

Quickly sensing that I wascausing mayhem in theentrance to A&E, Pavelquietly,politelyandpatientlytold me he was fine andwasjustwaitingforafriend.Bythistimecarhornswerebeing sounded behind meon Queen Victoria Road,

but Pav took it all in hisstrideandinstantlycalmedthe situationby giving thepeoplebehindthatmassivesmile of his and a thumbsup. Order restored forseconds as the next fewcarsdidthesameoncetheyrealisedwhoitwas!

Eventually regainingsome semblance ofprofessionalism, I lookedbackatthebemusedfacesofmypassengers.Expectingharsh words for the holdup I offered the onlyapologyIcould...”It’sPavelman!!”... job done and nocomplaintsaboutbeinglatefor appointments. He hadthateffectonpeople.

Mynext encounterwasattheheightoftheentertainersperiod. Hundreds upon

Anyhow, this didn’t put him off spending a good ten or fifteen minutes with my little nephew and posing for a photo at the end. A small thing, but those few minutes of his time have stayed with both of us all these years later...

tf 18 www.true-faith.co.uk

hundreds of people millingaround Maiden Castle inDurham as Kevin Keeganencouraged open trainingsessions. I took my youngnephew to one of thesesessionsandwithhimbeingthegoalieinhisschoolteam,he was attracted towardsthe session involving Pavel,Mike Hooper and a youngSteveHarper.

Agoodhourspentwatchingendedwithacheekyrequestfrom me to Pavel to allowmy nephew to take someshots at him in the goal.Fearing rejection, I needn’thaveasPavinstantlyglovedupagainandshoutedovertotheretreatingSteveHarper(YouneedtoimaginePav’sCzech / Geordie accenthere) “ Stevie, Stevie. Givemeoneball”.

Oneball later,andtheboyflicksitupandhalfvolleysashotstraightatPav’sface.Idon’tthinkhe’shitasweetershot since.Time stood still

as I pictured Pav with abroken nose and missingteeth, but reflexes and selfpreservation kicked in andhe parried the shot away.“ Jesus!”criesPavel (againwiththatgreataccent)butthen realises he’s sworein front of a child, andimmediately apologises!Anyhow,thisdidn’tputhimoff spendingagood tenorfifteen minutes with mylittle nephew and posingfor a photo at the end. Asmall thing, but those fewminutes of his time havestayed with both of us alltheseyearslater.

Now these two tales areminute instances of Pavelas a bloke, and they arecompletely true. I’ve notrememberedthemwithanyemotionsotherthantotryand portray his effect onpeopleand Iwantedtotrytodothemanjustice.

They sayyou shouldnevermeet your hero’s because

you’llbedisappointed.WellI’m glad I’ve returned towriting this the day afterhisdeath(can’tbelieveI’vejust written that) becauseI’vecontinuedtoreadabouthim, and look at picturesof him with countlessstarry eyed children – andadults-andtheyallgiveasensethatnoonewaseverdisappointed when theymetPav,howeverbriefly.

Pavelgotwhatthefootballclubmeanttousall,buthealsogotusasapeopleandanarea.Andwhenyouputthose two things together,you get an outpouring ofemotions akin to one ofyourownpassingaway.

Ourownpersonalfeelingoflossobviouslycan’tcompareto that of his family, but Ihopetheycantakecomfortin knowing that we willalways remember him aspartofourfamilytoo.

Pavelis,andwillalwaysbe,aGeordie...

Pavel got what the football club meant to us all, but he also got us as a people and an area. And when you put those two things together, you get an outpouring of emotions akin to one of your own passing away

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PAVELSRNICEK-1968-2015

Anotherwindow,anothergamble.Introducing25year-old,SenegaleseinternationalHenriSaivet.MikeAshleyisamanwholikesagamble-it’sonlyahandfulofyearssincehewon£1.3monasinglespinofaroulettetable-butatwhatpointwillhestopgamblingwithourfootballclub,andchangehistactinatransferpolicythatcertainlyinrecentseasonshasfailed.Simpleasthat.Failed.Toomanyplayersforthefuture,andnotnearlyenoughplayersforthenowhasseenUnitedslumpintosuccessiverelegationscraps,andifyouthoughtlastseasonwasaclosecall,youcanbetthisseasonis-atthisrateatleast-isgoingtobeevencloser.Closertothepointwherethequestionhastobeasked-Agambletoofar,MrAshley?

Introduction:

HENRI SAIVET

Now, I’m by no meanswriting off Saivet beforehe’sevenkickedaball.Onthecontrary,SaivetlooksfarmorereadyforthePremierLeague than many ofthosewhohaveflownintoNewcastle Internationalbefore him did. At 25,

he’s more mature, more

physicalthanRemyCabella,

Flaurian Thauvan and

Siem De Jong combined.

Powerful, compact, quick

andcleverwithhisfeet-not

to mention a fine header

oftheball-therearemany

reasonstogetexcitedover

LIAM NORRIS

the potential here. Butthereitis,thatwordagain.Potential.Aby-wordfornewsigningsatUnited.Awordthat inabsolutelymustbereplaced by ‘proven’, andfast.

Signed from Bord-eaux fora report-ed £4.5m Saivetleavesbehindanarrayofadmi r-ers in

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Francegivenhissomewhatremarkable turnaround informthisseason.Theyoung-estplayerevertobehand-ed a professional contractat Les Girondins, Saivet’scareer got off to a brightenough start, becoming aconstant presence on theteam sheet under FrancisGillot.

Hopefully not an ominousfact,butduringthe2011/12seasonSaivetplayedontheopposite flank of currentUnited flopYoanGouffran,and helped Bordeauxqualify for the followingyears Europa Leaguecampaign, a campaign inwhich he would face andimpress United during thegroupstage.

Asithappens,the2012/13campaign would prove tobeSaivet’smost fruitful todate,ashescoredninegoalsinallcompetitions.Provinghimself to be industriousand powerful, coupledwith a creative edge andmaturity which won himmanyplaudits in France, itwould be the two gamesagainst United amongstmany more during this

particularseasonwhichfirstpiqued United’s interest-and Saivet’s stock wouldonly grow the followingcampaign as the Senegalinternational started 33of Bordeaux’s 38 leaguegames, scoring in six ofthem.

Despite Bordeaux’s erraticform,SaivethassparkledinFrance this season. Many,despitetheenormoushypesurrounding the formerFrench U21 international,had prophesised Saivet asanother for the scrapheapfollowing the previouscampaign which wassomewhatstuntedbyinjuryand time rotting on thebench.Startinghiscareerasawinger,Saivethasmovedintoacentral-midfield rolethisseasonandhasthrived.

It’s fair to say given ourdefensive frailties thisseason, Saivet offers thesort of protection frommidfield that has beensorely lacking.WhereTioteonceexcelledasamidfieldrock, his performances inrecent seasons have beenso porous he’s more akinto sand rather than the

mountain that in timesgone by attracted theattention of ManchesterUnitedandArsenal.

As forAnita,his reputationhas never fully recoveredaftersuchanunconvincingand lame start to hisNewcastlecareer.Thehopeis that Henri Saivet is theman to act as aplug to averyleakydefence,andboydoweneedit.

Saivet arrives withinternational pedigree, andit’llsurprisenobodytohearthat the now Senegaleseman donned the blue ofFrance for the majority ofhisjuniorcareer.

Born in Dakar, Senegalin 1990, Saivet’s Frenchconnection comes dueto the fact he grew up inFrance,makinghimeligibletoplayforeithernationality.Breaking into the FranceU16 squad in 2005, heimpressed massively,playingin15games,scoringon8occasions.

His stats were equallyimpressive at U17 level,playing21times,andfindingtheneton9occasions.His

The youngest player ever to be handed a professional contract at Les Girondins, Saivet’s career got off to a bright enough start, becoming a constant presence on the team sheet under Francis Gillot

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game time was restrictedsomewhatatU18leveldueto injury, managing onlyfourappearances,however,he again proved an asset,scoringonce.

His involvement at U21level was restricted mainlyto friendly appearances,asheonly featured intwoof France’s qualificationgames for the U21EuropeanChampionship in2013,a tournamentwhichthe French U21’s failed toqualifyfor.

At 22, Saivet’s allegiancewithFranceended, insteadchoosing Senegal as thecountry he wanted torepresent. Making hisdebut against Zambiain the Summer of 2013,his Senegal career hasbeen encouraging, if notsomewhat curtailed byinjury.It’sinterestingtonotethat Saivet’s deploymentforcountrydifferstothatofclub.Whenoninternationalduty, Saivet is a rightwinger, rather than thecentraldefensivemidfielderwe signed from Bordeaux.Versatility is only to ourbenefit,though.

So, what does the signingof Henri Saivet representtoNewcastleUnited?Well,clearlyitseemsourtransfer

committeecontinuetoseethe French market as onethatcanbeexploited.Onetheonehand,it’scleartoseewhy-aleagueawashwithyoung, technical playersavailable far cheaper thanour English counterparts.But for every MoussaSissoka andYohan Cabayethere’sten,twentyoreventhirty Yoan Gouffran’sand Remy Cabella’s. Wecan’t continue to pursueand risk inexperiencedoverseas talent when ourimmediate aim is survival.What good is building adynastyfromthedepthsoftheChampionship?

As our first signing ofwhat is arguably the mostimportant transferwindowintheclub’shistory,there’spressure on this boy toperform from the outset.For everyone associatedwithNewcastleUnited,thistransfer must prove to besuccessful.Saivet,onpaper,ticks all the boxes - muchlike many before him did.But looking a good fit onpaper is far different tolooking a good fit on thepitch.

With Jonjo Shelvey now adone deal there’s slightlyless of an omen on HenriSaivettobeaninstanthit.It is hoped, and expected,

thatmorearetofollowtheSenegalese through thedoor.Youcan’thelpbutfeelif Saivet was the last ofa handful of signings andhis entrance low key, wewouldn’t be kicking up asmuch of a fuss about theplayer’sorigins.

It’saanotherFrenchforay,andat£4m,astealaccordingtomanyinFrance.Let’sjusthopethisparticularforeignimport works out a littlebetterthanmanyofthosewhohavecome-andgone-beforehim.Here’shoping.

When on international duty, Saivet is a right winger, rather than the central defensive midfielder we signed from Bordeaux. Versatility is only to our benefit, though

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FRIENDS ACROSS THE WATER Alex Picchietti

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I’vealwaysbeenahugesportsfan.Igrewupplayingsoccer,baseball,andbasketball,sosportswerealwaysbiginmylife.I’mahugeNFL,NBA,MLB,andNHLfan,butIneverreallywatchedEnglishfootball,mainlybecauseofthelackofcoverageitreceiveshereinthestates.However,throughtheencouragementofmybestfriend,adie-hardfootballfan,Istartedwatchingjustbeforethe2014WorldCup.Iwasimmediatelyenthralledbythesport.Thegameisbeautiful,fromthesimplicityoftheobjective–toputtheballinthenet–totheintricaciesofawonderfulstringofpassesthatculminateinamagnificentfinish.Incomparisontoothersports,whereagamewithplentyofscoringcouldbeasnoozefest,Icanfindmyselfthoroughlyenjoyinga0-0footballmatch.AnotherthingthathasdrawnmetothesportisthewayinwhichEnglishfootball’sleaguesareconstructed.

In American sports, theworst team receives thehighest pick in the draft.However,inEnglishfootball,the bottom teams movedown to a lower division!This truly makes everygame vital to each team,

and gives each match the

intensity many games in

the states lack. I also love

thesmallerproximityofthe

teams that play in English

football.

Many times in the United

States, teams travelthousands of miles toplay opponents. However,in the Premier League, thefarthest distance betweenclubs is around 300 miles.Thegeographicproportionsof the clubs add to the

www.true-faith.co.uk tf 25

intensity of the sport, asaway fans are often abletotravelandsupporttheirclub on a weekly basis.The rivalries, or derbies,asthey’recalledinEngland,are another thing that IloveaboutEnglishfootball.When I first saw thepicture of the proximityof Anfield and GoodisonPark, it blew me away.Tohavesuchrivalsbesoclosein distance is amazing,and it absolutely tells thestory of how crazy derbyweekcanbe.Finally, I lovethe fact that there areso many players from somany different places andcountries coming togethertoplaythesportthattheylove. In the United States,most of the players thatareprofessionalswerebornstateside.Everysooften,youwillseeaplayerthatcomesfromoverseas,butitisfewandfarbetween.Toseethewide spread demographicsin English football isincredible. It is great toseeSpanish,Dutch, Italian,French, English and other

nationalities playing onthe same pitch, puttingtheir different skills andtechniques together andplayingthebeautifulsport.

Now, for how I came tosupportNewcastleUnited.First, a bit about myself.As I mentioned before, Iam a die-hard sports fan.When I support a team,I am 100% behind themuntil the bitter end. As Iwas choosing a PremierLeague club to follow, Idefinitely did not want tojust pick one of the “Big4”.Ididn’twanttopullfora team just because theywereinChampionsLeague,orspentthemostmoneyinthetransferwindow.Rather,I would cheer for a clubthat represented my fanhood – a group of fansthat truly backed the clubnomatterwhathappened.EverythingIeverreadaboutNewcastleUnitedwasthattheir fans were the bestfansinthePremierLeague,andattheendoftheday,if the players played their

heartsoutandwent for iteveryweek,thefanswouldbe happy. It wasn’t aboutwinning titles (althoughthat would be welcomed),but it was about makingthecityproud.SoIchosetosupportNewcastleUnited.Ihavebeenwatching,andhavewatchedevery singlematchsince thebeginningof the 2014 season, andhave been infatuated withthe club ever since. I’lladmitthatithasn’tbeenaverysmoothstarttobeingaNewcastlefan.Fromthequestionableintentsoftheowner,tostrugglingthroughmonthsofJohnCarver,toalack of leadership in thesquad,ithasbeenpainfultowatch most matches.Andtobehonest, someofmyfriends that support clubslike Barcelona, Liverpool,and other bigger clubs,oftenaskme,“Whydoyoustill support Newcastle?”Tobehonest,I’vetakentheclubasmyown.Ifeelit’sapartofmylifenow–Iamconstantly readingtransferrumors, checking injury

updates,andsittingontheedgeofmyseatduringeachmatch. I so badly want tosee NUFC turned aroundand to be the club thefans deserve. I will alwaysstayloyaltotheBlackandWhiteuntil they return tothe glory that I can onlyreadaboutnow.

This is another reason Ilove supportingNewcastle– thehistory. I readaboutand watch videos onYouTubeofthebetterdays,often pulling up videos ofthe absolutely incredibleAlan Shearer and readingolder fans reminisceaboutthetimesthatwere.Whileit seems like contendingfor a Premier League titleissofaraway,Ihavefallenin love with the club, thefans and the history, andwill stand behind themuntiltheygetbacktothatpoint. I can say that aftertwoyearsofwatchingthePremierLeagueweekly,I’mamassive football fanandan even bigger NewcastleUnitedfan.

I would cheer for a club that represented my fan hood – a

group of fans that truly backed the club no matter WHAT...

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HE’S THE ‘KEEPER!

RobElliotwasbornintheSpringof1986inGreenwich,London.Hehasthusfarhadwhatcanonlybedescribedasamodestcareer.Afteroveradecadeofbeingaprofessionalgoalkeeper,heonlyhascirca170gamesunderhisbeltat

thelikesofCharltonAthleticandevenlesserluminaries,AccringtonStanley&NottsCounty.Despitealloftheabove,heisnowundoubtedlyahugelyintegralplayerifUnitedistosurvivethedreadeddropthisseason.

Under Alan Pardew’stenure, Rob featuredonly intermittently. Hewas clearly very muchnumber two to TimKrul and whenever hedid get the chance toplay,particularlyinhisearlierdays,NewcastleUnited based social

media was not kind. Iread some rather nastykeyboard warrior typestrolling not only hisperformance but hisphysicalappearancealso.

I think this is where partoftheproblemlies.NUFCsupporters, used to thisregime’s abject pennypinchingjudgedhimbefore

everproperlyseeingwhatthe lad could do. Whilst,everytimeIsawhimplay,the unjustified criticismwhich had come his wayhad me expecting a bitofaduffer,Iwasgenerallyrather impressedbywhatIwhatIwasseeing.

He has been thrustinto the limelightthis season followingKrul’s unfortunate longterm injury and whilstI was sorry for Tim, Iwas pleased that Elliotwas getting a properchance. As it stands,I firmlybelieve thatRobis the better of the twocustodians. For me, Krul

has given up on tryingto control his box andwas being beaten withalarming regularity byshots which frankly, heshouldbestopping.NacerChadli’s25yard‘effort’atthebackendoflastseasona hideous example ofwhichIjustcan’tseemtoforget. Krul has also hasdeveloped a tendency toparryshotsbackintoplay- something I loathe in akeeper.

How good is Elliot?Well, the evidenceprovided by somerecent performancesare very promising.Against Bournemouth

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he was astonishing,versus Spurs and Evertonhe rightly gained manyplaudits for his overallperformances howeverI would temper this bysaying he could’ve donebetteronthegoalsagainstinbothofthosefixtures.

In my opinion, alongsidehisabilityandexperience,even more importantelements Elliot bringsare his drive andpersonality.Here’s aguyused to mainly being asubstitute or playing invarious English footballbackwaters and beingthrust into the relativelimelight of NewcastleUnited clearly suitshim. I have read that heisparticularlyvocalinthedressingroomandyoucansee a bond is definitelydeveloping between himand the supporters. At

29, he should yet to becoming into his prime asastopperandthisshouldhopefully be to ourmutualbenefit.

I honestlywishwehadacouplemoreinhismould.We need more Captainson the pitch. He hassimilar battling qualitiesto the likes of KevinNolan and Joey Barton.These are the type ofplayerswerequireinourcurrent mire. Hopefully,one day our owner willcotton onto this fact.AsIsithere,finishingoffthisarticle, I have anotherglance at NewsnowNUFC on my laptop andallIreadaboutistheoddforeign player I’ve neverheardofandtrophyfuturemercenary types suchas Lyon’s centre forward,Alexandre Lacazette (!) Ifever there was a January

forhimtoseethelightit’sthisone.

Will Ashley suddenlyabandon his stringent“cheapyoung,continental- with future sell onpotential” model and ineffect,seethelight?

Despite the precarious

andpotentiallyfinancially

disastrouspositionhesees

his relegation threatened

clubcurrentlyresidingin?

Amazingly and tragically,

I think we all know the

answertothatone

I honestly wish we had a couple more in his mould. We need more  Captains on the pitch. He has similar battling qualities to the likes  of Kevin Nolan and Joey Barton.

S V B

GEORDIES HERE, GEORDIES THERE...

AgoodthingaboutlivinginsouthernSpainisthatyoudon’thavetotraveltoofartohaveagoodsummerholiday.WhereIlivethereisloadsofgoodbeachesandwearealsoonthedoorstepofAndalusia(Ed:SpanishBombsin…).LastsummerwedecidedtotakeafamilyholidaydownintheAlgarve(Portugal).OnlyamatterofloadingthecarupandtakingaleisurelysevenhourdrivedowntherewithafewstopoffsinAndalusia.

I received the usual pre-

holiday pep talk from the

wife“NOFOOTBALL!”and

to be fair I was in total

agreement with that. We

werestayinginapicturesque

littlefishingvillage,nextto

Tavira, 17 km east of Faro

andonlyafewmilesacross

theborderfromSpain.

Tony Higgins

BENFICA 0 SPORTING LISBON 1Super-taçaTrophy-09/08/2015,AlgarveStadium)Attendance:28,717

Theideawastorelaxandto

haveafewdayssightseeing

along the full stretch of

theAlgarveanditsAtlantic

coast line, which is very

impressive I should add.

Anyway a few days into

the holiday and I’m lying

on a sun lounger reading

the local sports paper.

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Reading Portuguese isn’tthat different to Spanishbut understanding thespoken word is anotherstory.So,thereIamreadingan article about Benficaplaying Sporting Lisbon, insomething called Super-taçaTrophy. “Look at this”I said to my oldest lad“Canny game, we will tryandsneakawayandwatchit in a bar”, at that pointthinking the game was tobe played in Lisbon. Thenmyattentionwasdrawntothe time date and venue.20:45,Sunday9thAugustattheAlgarveStadium.Ihadbeentothestadium,whenNewcastleplayedafriendlyagainstBragain2012,andIknewitwasonlyabouttenmilesalongtheroad.Wow!I thought, the PortugueseDerby Eterno on mydoorstep! I couldn’t missthat!Now,onlythepricklyissueofraisingfootballwiththe wife. It’s not that our

lassdoesn’tlikemegoingtofootball,itisjustthatIhaveformwhenitcomestothissortofthingandshethinksthat I plan it. During pastholidays ithashappenedafewtimes.OnceinTaragona(Catalonia) our holidaywas interrupted when Ifoundout thatBarçawereplaying Boca Juniors andalso Icanrememberbeingin the Italian Lakes whenMilan played Inter, twogames, I am sure you willagree,difficulttomiss.Iwillspareyouthedetailofhowthe negations went but Iwangleditandwewereofftothegame.

Wearrivedat the stadiumand happened to park attheendwhere theBenficafans were congregated. Ididn’thavethepleasureofgoingtotheREALStadiumof Light when the Magsplayed there in 2013 butwastoldthateveryonehad

agreat time inLisbonandthat both sets of fans goton well. However, lookingat the Benfica ultras theylooked like the type oflads not to be messedwith.ThinkofextrasonanAmerican prison movie ordramaseriestogetmydrift.Theirethicalmixcertainlyreflected Portugal’spast colonial exploits.It reminded me of colddarknights,ontheSevenSisters Road, after Spursawayinthe80s.

Next we had the smallhurdle of not havingtickets to get over and tobe honest I thought thiscould have been majorissue. Nevertheless, gettingour hands on some spareswasn’tasbigaproblemasI had envisaged. We weresoonapproachedbyatout,aswewerestickingoutliketheproverbialsorethumbs,andwhenIstartedspeaking

However, looking at the Benfica ultras they looked like the type of lads not to be messed with. Think of extras on an American prison movie or drama series to get my drift

tf 30 www.true-faith.co.uk

Spanish he retorted byanswering “Don’t worry Ispeak English” which hedid perfectly. Thinking hewasonagood thing,withclueless holidaymakers, hetriedtostinguswithsomeOTTprices,whichIlaughedoffandtoldhimwewouldtry our luck elsewhere.Which thankfully we didand soon we came acrosstwo lads offering us twotickets for theBenfica endat face value, €15 a pop!ThatstillmeantweneededanotherticketsoIdecidedtochancemyarmwithourmate the tout. When weapproached he had a biggrin on his face, “Nothingdoingtheneh?”

“YesandnoIsaid,wehavetwo tickets so now weonly need one” The smilesuddenly went from hisface and let’s just say wethenwangledagoodpriceforadecentseat,howeveritwasfortheSportingend.We decided it would bebestifmyoldestladwentinwiththeSportingfansandmeandtheyoungestmadeourwaytotheBenficaend.Onceinthequeueweagainstood out and soon somefanswereaskingwherewecame from. The BenficaladshadnothingbutgoodwordsforNewcastleUnited

and their fans. I oncehad a similar experienceat Athletic Bilbao, whereI wasn’t allowed to buya beer once they knewwhere I was from. Thingslikethatalwaysgiveyouanimmensesenseofpride.

Inside the ground theatmospherewaselectricasbothsetsoffansputontifodisplaysandtheusualarrayof flares, all backed up bya cacophony of noise.Thematchitselfwasquitegoodtooasbothteamswentforeach other from the off.Plentyofskillwasondisplayas the Portuguese leagueis awash with Brazilians.However, it was anotherSouth American, PeruvianAndreCarrillo, who scoredtheonlygoalofthegame,inthe53rdminute,towinthetrophyforSporting.Thegoalcanbeseenbelow.

TheBenficaladsweren’ttoohappy with that outcomeandagoodfewflareswere

thrown onto the pitch as

thegamegametoaclose.

Thismademeabitworried

on how I was going to

retrievemyoldestladfrom

theotherendoftheground

butasithappened,through

thewondersofWhatsapp,

we were able to meet up

withoutanincident.

Sothentofinishoff,anyone

that knows the Algarve

Stadium, an out of town

Meccanojob,willknowit’s

aballachetogetbackinto

Faro from. Nevertheless

after a few quick drinks,

in a local hostelry, we

managedtogetataxiand

rendezvous with my wife

and daughter. They had

spent a nice evening in a

restaurant at the marina,

oblivious to the fact that

one of the biggest derbies

inEuropewastakingplace

a just a couple of miles

away. Alls well that ends

well!

You can read Tony’s excellent e-book: A Homage To Murcia, get it here

The Benfica lads had nothing but good words for Newcastle United and their fans. I once had a similar experience at Athletic Bilbao, where I wasn’t allowed to buy a beer once they knew where I was from.

true faith has alwaysprovided a platformto fans to write abouttheir club and give theirown opinions on whatis currently going on atUnited as well as thedifferent perspectives ofourclub’shistoryandthewidergame.Oh,weloveabitnostalgiaandhistory.

There is no typical truefaithwriter,theycomeinall shapes and sizes andinclude home and awayzealots. young lads and

lasses,veteranfans,seasonticket holders, exiles andwhateverelseyoucaretomention.

You don’t need to be apreviously publishedwriter or have any fancyqualifications.Allwecareabout is whether youhavealoveforNewcastleUnitedandawilltoinformandentertainyour fellowsupporters.Wedon’tcareif your opinions are thesame or are similar tothe editorial position of

true faith and in fact we

welcome those that are

completely opposite in

honesty.

You might want to write

detailed exposes of the

United financial and

business model or you

mightwanttodoamatch-

reportoryoumightwant

to do something we’ve

nevereverconsidered.

We also like dipping our

toes into the waters of

music, film and fashion

soifthat’syourforte,just

dropusalineaswell.

Don’t forget, we

welcome all cartoonists,

photographers and

designers to join us as

well, so whatever your

talent, we can put you

to work with the aim of

establishing true faith as

the best fanzine for the

best supporters in the

wholeworld.

All emails to editor@

true-faith.co.uk

truefaithhasbeenestablishedsince1999asoneofthemostsuccessful,influentialandbest-sellingfanzinesinthecountry.ItssuccessisbaseduponthecontributionsofNewcastleUnitedsupporters.Aswemoveintothedigitalageandtakeuptheopportunitiesfornewformsofsupporterexpression,truefaithisattheforefrontofthenewfanzinecultureanddevelopsitsdigitalfanzine(whatyouarereadingnow),itsmatch-daye-newsletter,TheSpecial,itsPodcasts,itsvideo-blogsandofcoursethewebsite.Wehopetobepositionedforanythingelsethatdevelopsoverthenextfewyearsaswell.

Write for true faith

www.true-faith.co.uk tf 31

Manyofthebrandsmentionedwithinthisseries,aresynonymouswiththesubcultureoffootballcasuals.Itcouldbeargued,thatcertainlabelsactuallyowetheirpopularitywithintheUnitedKingdom,togroupsofawayfanstravellingthecontinent.Thereisoneinparticularhowever,thatduetoitsmainstreampopularityandworldwideacclaim,waspopularthroughoutmanywalksoflifebeforeitmadeitswaytofootballterracesacrosstheUK.

Founded in 1949 byAdolf “Adi” Dassler inHerzogenaurach,Germany,Adidas is widely regardedas one of the best andmost recognisable brandswithintheworldofsports.Originally set up in hismother’s kitchen, Dasslerintendedtoproducesportsshoes for athletes shortlyafter his return fromWorld War I. Joined byhis brother Rudi in 1924,the pair began producingfootwear together, underthe moniker “GebruderDassler Schuhfabrik”. Asthe company expandeddue to exposure at the1936 summer Olympics(DasslerdrovefromBavaria

BRANDED: ADIDAS Ross Jenkins Follow @_Jenky88

totheeventwithabagof

runningspikes,successfully

managing to persuade

participating athletes to

compete wearing them),

the brothers were selling

inexcessof200,000pairs

ofshoesayearintheyears

leading up to World War

II.Withbusinessbooming,

thepairwouldsplitin

1947,aftera

bizarre

miscommunicationwithin

an air raid shelter a few

years earlier. Rudi Dassler

went on to create rival

tf 32 www.true-faith.co.uk

When it comes to the brand’s place in the hearts of football casuals and those on football terraces, the love affair began at the same place as it did for Dassler himself-footwear

www.true-faith.co.uk tf 33

company Puma, with AdiDassler founding Adidasin response. The popularthought that the name isanacronymforthewords“All Day I Dream AboutSports”, is actually anurban myth-the brandsnamesimplybeingcreatedaround the name of itsfounder,AdiDas(sler).

When it comes to thebrand’splaceintheheartsof football casuals andthoseonfootballterraces,theloveaffairbeganatthesame place as it did forDassler himself-footwear.In 1979, Adidas releasedthe Forest Hill silhouette.

A simple tennis shoe, itcomprised of a whiteleather upper, a yellowmidsole and gold threestripebranding-thiswastobe the trainer with whichthebondbetweenfootballfansandAdidaswasborn.Many other Adidas stylesfollowed that wouldappealmassively to thosefond of casual style (andmanyoftheirremakesstilldo, which we’ll get ontolater).The brand followedupwithclassicssuchastheBeckenbauer,SL72,Samba,Gazelle,Spezial,Hamburg,TrimmTrabandtheAdidasHandball, just to name afew. Often derived from

football boots the playersthey were watching fromtheterraceswerewearing,thesilhouettesmentionedabove,amongmanyothers,quicklybecameastapleofthe casual style and thethree stripe branding wasimperative to be had onyourfeetifyouweretoberecognised.

Like most other casualtrends, where the originsof Adidas within thesubculture began isstill argued about tothis day. Like many ofthe continental brandsbroughtbacktotheUnitedKingdom however, the

change in style from thatof the “boot boy” casual(to any young readers-the song probably makesmore sense now), to themuch smarter, sportswearorientatedcasualislargelyattributed to Liverpoolfans.Theirreasoningforthechangewas that they feltmanypoliceofficerswouldstillbeonthe lookout forthose in Doctor Martenboots with shaved heads,whilsttheywouldbeabletogoabouttheirbusinessinafarlesshassledmannergiventheirsharp,highendappearance

One of the brands mostpopular ventures, wasthat of the City Series.Originally released in theearly 70s, the pack waslaunched in two separateparts-European Cities andthenNorthAmerican(thelatter being released inthe late70’sandfinishing

in the early 80’s). Manysilhouettes were releasedhowever the Berlin,Hamburg, London andStockholm models wereparticularly popular. Thecolours were striking andthe series was seen assomethingdifferenttothestandard Adidas trainersavailable at the time. Inkeeping with this line ofthinking,oneofthebrand’smost notable ability wasto keep up with the everchanging styles withinfootball. Whilst brandswouldcomeandgo(whatwas once Fred Perry andSlazenger, quickly becameLyle & Scott and Lacoste.NextwereFilaandSergioTacchini as sportswearbecame the man of thehourbeforehighendbrandssuch asArmani,Valentinoand eventually StoneIsland took over), Adidaswasalwaysaconstant.Forall there were numerous

other sports relatedbrands that were popularwith casuals at the time,anotherchoiceoffootwear(at leastwhen it came totrainers)wasrareaftertheaffiliationwasborn.Adidaswere able to evolve andproduce silhouettes andthat complimented theever changing, fast pacedcasualbrandslistandstyle,allowing them to remainthe main choice for thefashionableterracegoer.

Fast forward to themoderndaygameandforall as we’ve said before,football hooliganism hasdecreased massively, thecasual style is still thereand with it, is Adidas.Still a staple on standsaroundtheUK,theAdidasOriginalsseriesalongwithnumerous special editionremakes and re-releasesof old classics ensurethat the brand is still a

One of the brands most popular ventures, was that of the City Series. Originally released in the early 70s, the pack was launched in two separate parts-European Cities and then North American

www.true-faith.co.uktf 34

Adidas as a brand, but their trainers in particular are regarded not only as classics, but as current favourites, simply because the name resonates with football fans around the world

www.true-faith.co.uk tf 35

favouritewithfootballfansspanning all ages-eitherthose wearing remakes oforiginalstheyusedtoown,orthetimelesssilhouettesstill appealing to youngerfansastheyhavedoneforthe last forty plus years.To return to some of thestyles mentioned earlierin this piece, you’ll onlyhave to take a quick lookaround SJP on a saturdayafternoontonoticeplentyofGeordies,youngandoldsportingapairofSpezial’s,or Hamburg’s. One oftheir most celebratedsilhouettes ever that hasseen a gigantic rise inpopularityoverthelast24monthsistheStanSmith-whilst not necessarily ahugefavouritebackintheprime of casual fashion,it isa traineryouwill seeso regularly in the standstoday, you will almostbecome immune to it. Itis also further testamentto Adidas’ ability to stayrelevant as abrand, alongwithbeingabletocontinueand strengthen that bondnot only with the gameoffootball,butwiththosewholoveitso.

Adidas as a brand, buttheir trainers in particularare regarded not only asclassics, but as currentfavourites, simplybecausethe name resonates withfootball fans around theworld.Whilst others suchas Nike and (to a lesserextent) Umbro sponsorteams and produce gearthat many of us enjoywearing, Adidas, when itcomes to footwear, is theone everyone agrees on.

Adidas brand consultant,Adidas X Spezial curatorand self confessed traineraddict Gary Aspdensummed the brand upexcellently within theworld of football for me,whenhesaid:

“Despite the way that

the whole football casual

fashion would change

really quickly, Adidas is one

of the brands that remained

constant throughout it”

Us as a group of fans inparticular, probably holdAdidas closer to us thanmany others within thefootballingworld.Inanerawhenwe’restuckwithshitePumanumbersthatcloserresemble bin bags thanfootballshirts,IconstantlyfindmyselflookingbackattheoldAdidaseffortsthatmy Mam and Dad wouldrepeatedly buy me as abairn (head to toe-socksand all, worn only with apair of Adidas Predators-that means the boots onthe pitch and the traineralternative off it). Thatgrandadcollarfrom95/96,the shield on the back ofthe97/98kit,theawaykitsofboth95/96and96/97-thesearethememoriesofAdidas I have and cherishandthatlovehasadaptedinto an appreciation fortheir footwear as i’vegrownolder.I’msuremanyother fans are the sameand it is for that reason,thebondbetweenfootballfans andAdidas, footwearand all, will continue tostandthetestoftime.

www.true-faith.co.uktf 36

Jimmy Hill:Football ManJimmyHillleftalegacywhichisunparalleledinthemoderngame.Youmaynotlikeeverythinghedidbuthewaslargelyresponsibleforthewayprofessionalfootballlookstoday.Hillwasnotanoutstanding

player, appearing for

Brentford as a teenage

before joining Fulham

in 1952, helping them to

promotiontoDivisionOne

in May 1959. He played

over 300 games for the

Cottagers, appearing

alongsidethelikesofJohnny

HaynesandBobbyRobson.

The highlight of his careerwas scoring five goals inan away match againstDoncasterRovers.

Itwasasaunionorganiserthat he first came toprominence, however,campaigning through theProfessional Footballers’Associationagainstthe£20maximumwageuntilitwas

scrapped in 1961. One ofthe chief beneficiaries washis old mate Haynes, whomoved on to a reputed£100perweek,morethanfivetimestheaveragesalaryatthetime.

After he retired Hill tookoverasmanagerofCoventryCity, leading them fromDivisionThree to the First

WALLACE WILSONFolow @WallaceHWilson

www.true-faith.co.uk tf 37

Division. His wide ranginginnovative approach wassoon in evidence fromchanging their kit to SkyBluetointroducingthefirstcolourmatchprogrammes.Heevenpennedanewclubsong called The Sky BlueSong, based on the EtonBoatingSongandorganisedpre-match entertainmentto persuade fans to getthematchearlyandspendtheirmoneyintheground.A career beckoned as asuccessfulmanager(hiswinpercentage with Coventrywas44.5%)butinsteadheopted to enter the worldof broadcasting, becominghead of sport at LondonWeekendTelevision.

Ashebecamemorewidelyknown he was comparedto Bruce Forsyth, havinga similarly over-endowedchin(usuallycoveredwithagoateebeard).However,he quickly becamerecognised for his incisivemind as he revolutionisedthe way football waspresentedonTV.

He fronted ITV’s coverageofthe1970WorldCupandit was his suggestion tointroduce television’s first

panelofpundits-MalcolmAllison, Derek Dougan,Paddy Crerand and BobMcNab. They were eachpaid £500 but instead ofbeing flown to MexicotheysatinastudioinWestLondon and argued aboutwhattheyhadseenthrougha live feed. England’s AlanMullery (later a pundithimself) was so annoyedatwhatwassaidabouthisperformances that on hisreturn toEnglandhewentto the studio to throw hisEnglandcapatAllison.Theviewerslovedit.

One incident sums up hisenthusiasm for football. In1972, the linesman (stilllinesmen then), pulled amuscle and was unable tocontinue. A request wentout over the tannoy atHighbury (still Highburythen)askingforaqualifiedreplacement or thegame would have to beabandoned. As a qualifiedreferee, Hill donned atracksuit and trainers twosizestoosmalltostepintothebreach.Helovedbeinginvolved and in front of acrowd. His involvementwithArsenalpredated that

as he wrote the lyrics fortheirCupFinal song‘GoodOldArsenal’in1971whichsubsequently won a golddisc!

Following his successfultransfer to the TV studiowithITV,theBeebpoachedhimtoheadupMatchoftheDay, taking over from thepeerless David Coleman in1973.WhileheadinguptheBBCcoverageheprovokeda long-running feud withScottish fanswhobelievedthat he had a bias againstplayers and clubs northof the border. Some Scotseven turnedupatEnglandScotland matches wearingfalse chins and unfurlingbannersclaiming‘JimmyHillisaPoof’.Nevertheless,heanchored the programmefor 15 years, making over600appearancesbeforehe,in turn, was replaced byDes Lynam. Most fans ofthe show thought he hadoverstayed his welcome.Inevitably,insuchapositionhe was responsible for anumberofon-screengaffes:

‘England now have three fresh men with three fresh legs’

He fronted ITV’s coverage of the 1970 World Cup and it was his suggestion  to introduce television’s first panel of pundits

www.true-faith.co.uktf 38

“It’s a cup final - and the one that wins it goes through’

‘We’re not used to weather in June in this country’

‘And there’s Ray Clemence, looking as cool as ever out in the cold’

Even here, however,not quite a match forColemanballs…

Whilst at the BBC Hillreturned to work atCoventry City first asManaging Director in1975 and subsequently asChairman. It was in thisrole, at a crucial relegationmatchathome toBristolCity at the end of the1976–77 season, Hill wasadvised to delay the kickoffby10minutes for fansstill outside caught in theheavytraffic.Themackems,who were also facingrelegation, were playing atEverton and kicked off ontime, eventually losing thegame 2–0.The Sunderlandresult was flashed up onthescoreboardatCoventry.

Coventry’sgamewithBristolCity stood at 2-2, a resultwhich meant that bothteams stayed up and themackems being relegated.Hill was subsequentlyaccused by mackems ofmakinghisplayerspasstheball around in their ownhalfforthelast10minutesofthegame,therebysavingCoventryfromrelegationattheirexpense.Hilarious!

A subsequent FootballLeagueinquirywasheldbutHill, who at the time wasalso inaseniorpositionattheFootballLeague,didnotstandtoonesidewhiletheinquiry was held.Coventrywereaskednottointerfereagain but the result stood.Obviously everything wasaboveboard.…

In1999HillmovedtoSkySports where he headedup Jimmy Hill’s SundaySupplement, a discussionprogramme which wassupposed to take place inHill’skitchenoverbreakfast.Thefactthatitwasfilmed

onanindustrialestatenearHeathrowdidnotstopHillfrom claiming he was justpoppingout to thegardenwheninfacthewasheadingoutofthefireexit.

While with Sky, he causedoutrage by defending RonAtkinson’sracistcommentsin2004whichhesaidwasthelanguageofthefootballfield.Hillwentontosay

“In that context, you wouldn’t think that words like n****er were particularly insulting: it would be funny. Without meaning to insult any black men, it’s us having fun... I mean, n****r is black - so we have jokes where we call them n****s because they’re black. Why should that be any more of an offence than someone calling me chinny”?

His comments weredescribedas‘mind-boggling’bythethendirectorofKickItOut,football’santi-racismgroup.Heshouldhavebeensacked.

His comments were described as ‘mind-boggling’ by the then director of Kick It Out, football’s anti-racism group

www.true-faith.co.uk tf 39

But itwasasan innovatorthatHillisbestremembered.He commissioned the firstEnglish all-seater stadiumat Coventry, lifted a banonplayermediainterviews,introduced the firstelectronic scoreboard in1964andin1965wasthefirst to show a live matchvia CCTV on four giantscreens while at Coventry.He has also been creditedwith the introduction ofthe three points for a winsystem, pioneered in 1981which has subsequentlybeen introduced world-wide.This,morethanmanyof his other innovations,couldbeseenasapositivedevelopment, persuadingawaysidestogoforawinwhere before a draw wasseenasagoodresult(stillisinsomeplaces).

These innovations havehad a significant influenceon the way the game isplayedandwatchedacrosstheworld.Theintroductionof all-seater stadiums wasseen as the panacea afterthe Hillsborough disasteralthough subsequently the

truthhascomeoutthat itwasprimarilyduetocrowdcontrolmismanagementbySouth Yorkshire Police ontheday.Itgavetopclubsanopportunity to control theenvironment within theirstadiumswhilemaximisingrevenues from supporters.Overrecentyearswehaveseen a reaction to thissterilised experience withthecampaignsforstandingin British stadiums, basedon the German model,giving people a choice ofmatchexperience.

The shirt sponsorshipHill introduced while atCoventry, has led to thedesecration of club shirts,becoming little more thanadvertising hoardings fora variety of organisations,ranging from Unicef tow***a. I am not alone inthinking that the classicshirtfeaturingaclubbadgeonthefrontandanumberon the back looked justfinebut itdidnotproducethe money the apparentlyinexhaustible greed of thecurrentgamerequires.

As ever, when someonejoins the choir invisible,there is a tendency tooverlookthenegativeandhighlight the positive butoverall, Hill’s contributionwas a mixed bag. Someof his ideas have led toa move towards a morecommercially orientatedgame - shirt sponsorship,all-seaterstadiaandsoon.Some were justified - thelifting of the maximumwage, 3 points for a win.Some were flawed inthe implementation -football pundits - I giveyou Robbie Savage andPaul Merson. Some werejust plain wrong - ‘GoodOld Arsenal’?! However,what was unusual is thebreadth of his innovationand influence. Only GaryLinekerhasmanagedsuchasuccessfulTVcareerafterretiringfromplaying.Heisalso remembered fondlybyCoventryCityfanswhonamed a bar after himin 2007. Jimmy Hill diedon December 19 2015 attheageof87afteralongbattle against Alzheimer’sDisease.

Some of his ideas have led to a move towards a more commercially orientated game - shirt sponsorship, all-seater stadia and so on. Some were justified - the lifting of the maximum wage, 3 points for a win

IcanbynomeanscallmyselfafullypaidupmemberoftheHeedArmybutIdohaveahugesoftspotforGatesheadFC.OverthelasttwentyoddyearsIhavetriedtogettoafewgameseveryseason,obviouslythisismoredifficultthanitsoundsbecauseIliveinSouthernSpain.

Duetothatgeographyissueand work I missed theirrun to Wembley in 2014.However,Iwastherewhenthey played Darlo in thesemi-finaloftheFATrophyin 2011. That game goesdown as one my favouriteaway trips in recent years.Gateshead had a goodfew of well let’s just saythemoreexcitabletypeoffan with them that day.At the end of the gamewewereall inafineDarlohostelry, enjoying a post-matchbeer,whenDurhamConstabulary entered thebartokindlyadviseusthatagroupofDarlofanswerewaitinginanotherbar.Theirintention was to give us a

less than friendly send-offback toTyneside.This wasthe trigger for one Heedwagtopipeup“Wheywhydivintyelotf*ckoffthen?”the lookon theplods facewaspriceless!

Anyway,thispre-Christmastrip home, to see myparents, coincided with ahome game against fanowned Chester FC, a clubthat I have a lot of timefor.ChesterFCwasformedby fans from the ashes ofliquidatedclubChesterCityand you can watch their story here.

Sothenitwasanobrainer,I was off to the match

and the editor of this finepublication said that hewouldjoinme.

I decided that a few prematch bevies should bepartakenonGatesheadHighStreet,Ihadn’tdrankthereforyearsandthoughtitwasagoodaplaceasanywhere.BehindtheglitzoftheSage,Baltic, Millennium Bridge,newcinemaandnewTescothere is still an overridingstench of poverty andhardship on the streets ofGateshead. The NorthernPowerhouse, I wonder eh?Pawn shops, charity shopsand bookies…same oldstory.BythewayImisstheiconic Get Carter car park

Gateshead 1 Chester 0InternationalStadium,28/11/15,Att:842

Tony Higgins @higgins1892

NEWS FROM NOWHERE - GATESHEAD REVISITED

www.true-faith.co.uktf 40

andtheTrafalgarpub,whichalways was so welcoming,especiallyforChelseafans.

After a couple of beers Idecided to walk the shortdistancetotheground,justasthemid-winterduskandcoldbegantocut in. Ihadforgotten how quickly itgets dark at that time ofyear in the North East.AsI walked along, pulling mycollaruptoprotectmefromthewinter chill, I surveyedthe landscape. ClarkeChapmans, that employedthousands of people, nowgoneand replacedbynewhouses, which make upthe new Old Fold Estate,which probably has adifferentnamenow?Ireadabigsignthatstates“LoveInnovation,LiveGateshead,Love Gateshead”. Behindthesignliesahugeplotofderelictwasteland.

I reached the ground justbefore kick-off to find thebar closed and bizarrely,just a few weeks before

Christmas, the clubmerchandiseshopisclosedalso. So with nothing elsetodo Igoand findaseat,in the sparsely filled Tyne&WearStand. Ithasbeenwrittenmanytimesbeforebut Gateshead FC really

need to have their own

stadiumsoon.Nodisrespect

toGatesheadcouncil,who

have provided a place for

the club to play, but the

International Stadium is

justnotafootballstadium

and to make matters

worse is freezing on a

late November Saturday

afternoon.AsIfindmyspot

GroovyTrainbyTheFarmis

playing over the stadiums

PAandthattakesmymind

offthecoldforabit.

Thematchwasthefirstone

forTheHeedsnewmanager

Neil Aspin. Gateshead lad

Aspin watched the game

fromthestandsasreserve-

teambossMickyCumminstook charge. Aspin’s firstinterviewasHeedbosshere.

www.true-faith.co.uk tf 41

The match was the first one for The Heeds new manager Neil Aspin. Gateshead lad Aspin watched the game from the stands as reserve-team boss Micky Cummins took chargE

Gateshead started thegame brightly but itwas the visitors whocame closest to openingthe scoring. Tom Shawcollected the ball in thearea and managed to slipitunderneathSamRussell,only for Simon Ramsdentoclearitoffthelinewithalast-ditchslide.Thegameebbed and flowed but atthe interval the teamswent in levelat thebreak.Thesecondhalfwasmuchof the same fayre and ittookanowngoaltobreakthe deadlock. Gateshead’sHamilton, who had beenlively all game, receivedthe ball on the left-handside of the box and hisshotacrossgoalwasturnedinto his own net by AlexWhitmore on 82 minutes.AnervouseightminutesorsotickedbybutthankfullyGatesheadmangedtohangontothewelcome3points.The Heed had only wononeoftheirlastninebeforethisgame.Matchhighlightscanbeseenhere.

AfterthegameMr.Edandmedecidedtoheadtotheofficial home ofThe HeedArmy,TheNagsHeadPubinGatesheadTownCentre.Formethereisnothingquitelikeapost-matchtypicalBritishboozer. Instantly I got thefeelingof camaraderie andtogetherness, something IhavetosayIfeelismissingsomewhat a couple ofmiles across the river. Iam asked what I want atthe bar and I opt for apintofExhibition,adrink Ihadn’tseenforyears. “Areyousure?”mymatchgoingcompanion asks. One sipandInowknowthereasonfor the quizzical question,its rancid, sentimentalityandbeingonhomesoilhas

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got the better of me!We

settledownandontheTV

Leicester City are playing

Manure and they are

winning,whichiscontinuing

theirgreatrun.Thetuneson

thejukeboxaretopnotch,

theClash,theJametc.and

theatmosphereinthebaris

trulywhatgoingtofootball

should be all about. Then

unfortunately it’s time to

gobutIwillbeback,I just

don’tknowwhen.

I opt for a pint of Exhibition, a drink I hadn’t seen for years.  “Are you sure?” my match going companion asks. One sip and I now know the reason for the quizzical question, its rancid, sentimentality and being on home soil has got the better of me!

Gateshead’s Hamilton, who had been lively all game, received the ball on the left-hand side of the box and his shot across goal was turned into his own net by Alex Whitmore on 82 minutes.

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I love Public Enemy but I haven’t seen them live before so when I was messing around on t’internet in the summer and saw that they were supporting the Prodigy at Newcastle, I bought myself a couple of tickets and promptly forgot all about it. Roll on end of year and I realised that I would need a like-minded idiot with a tendency to drink excessive amounts and who possesses a ‘colourful’ past. He would be the perfect person to accompany me on the trip to musical heaven.

Step up Mr Greaves whowas equally as excitedaboutseeingthebandsashe was for getting pissedon a school night in thetoon.Actually,hehadseenthe Prodigy back in theday at a rave (hardcore– you know the score)whereas I’d only seenthem supporting Oasisat Knebworth the nightbefore the charity shieldgame again manure (welost4-0,whatasurprise).My recognition was one

of them blowing Oasisaway so seeing themagainwasgoodcrackbutitwasPublicEnemyIwastherefor.

We boarded the trainin Durham and madeour way through to thetoon and quickly foundourselves a spot in theIrish / Dickensian Library/ Railway Bar oppositethe station (whatever it’scallednow)andmadeourway down to the arenaearly to see PE. Quite

a few other people haddecidedtodothesame.Itwasherewhere I realisedhowmuchofadickIreallyam.I’dboughtseatticketswhichsoundedgood(andlookedgood)on line, butare shit when you are ata gig with a nutter. Wepromptly decided thefloorwastheplaceforusand blagged our way inthere ASAP.They openedwith ‘Miuzi Weighs aTon and Rebel without aPause’(oneofthegreatest

The Prodigy/ Public EnemyNewcastle Arena , Nov 26th, 2015

www.true-faith.co.uk tf 45

Ted Edwards

Hip Hop anthems) andkeptupthemajestyfromthen on. Highlights formewereBringtheNoise,Don’t Believe the Hype,He Got Game, Fight thePower and the closingtune of ‘HarderThanYouThink’ but there was alittle solo DJ Set by DJLord in amongst whichwasspectaculartosaytheleast – gotta love a hiphop DJ spinning ‘SmellsLike Teen Spirit’ into hisset. Chuck D is a heroof mine by the way –his voice is brilliant andhasn’tagedasecond.

After caning as manybottles of beer as wepossibly could in theinterval between bands,we made our way backonto thedance floor andwaited for theProdigy tostart. There was a cannymixinthecrowdlikewitheveryone from teenagers

and students to wizenedolddrugaddledravers(MrG)withtheoddhousewifeandcuriousschoolteachertype. It is always at thispoint where your choiceofcompanioniskey.Ifyouarewitha‘decentladwholikesadrinkbutissteadyaway’ type then you areprobably going to take asafespotinthecrowdandenjoytheband.Ifyouarewitha‘like-minded loonywho still thinks he is inhisdrugcrazed20’s’typethen you are probablygoing to make your waydown the front and haveabitofajumpabout.Wechose the second option(and regretted it heavilyfor the next two days).As the band ripped into‘Breath’, we knew it wasgoingtobeagoodnight.I’d personally forgottenhowgoodTheProdigyarelive as their mix of hardcoredanceandrockreally

hitthespot.Asetpackedwith gems (especially‘Nasty’, ‘Voodoo People’and ‘Firestarter’) got thecrowdgoingandthemoshpit was excitable but notmenacing inanyway.Anygig finishing with ‘SmackmyBitchUp’isfinebymeand it was refreshing toseemen in their40’s likeKeith Flint, Maxim andLiam Howlett jumpingaround like idiots. I bettheir knees weren’t asf***ed as mine on theFridaymorningthough!

All inall,agreatnighttosee aband I have alwaysloved and one whichenhancedtheirreputationas a great live band anda great event.The venueis shit mind and nothingwilleverchangemymindabout that. Give me theAcademy/CityHalloranyothervenueinNewcastlefirst!

...and it was refreshing to see men in their 40’s like Keith Flint, Maxim and Liam Howlett jumping around like idiots. I bet their knees weren’t as f***ed as mine on the Friday morning though!

www.classicfootballshirts.co.uk

SPURS 1 NEWCASTLE UNITED 2White Hart Lane, Sun 13th Dec 2015, 4.00pm, Premier League, Att: 35,768

An astonishing victory at a Spurs side seen as outsidecontendersforthetitlesawusrepriseourvisitlastseasonbybeingdogshit in the firsthalf beforewinning thedaywithasecondhalfturnaround.Itwasmorealastquarterturnaroundheremind.Tobefair,westartedquitewell–deJonghadagoalboundeffortblockedbyhisownman inCissebutwestillwentinbehindwhenDiermetacornerandsawhisheaderpalmedinbyEliottinourgoal.

Wedidn’tholdoutmuchhopeinthesecondhalfandweweregoingnowhereuntilfirstCisseandthendeJongwerewithdrawn.WithinsecondsofMitroviccomingonforthelatter,hehaduslevel,tappinginfromaboutaninchoutafterMbemba’sheaderevadedthekeepertosendtheawayendintodelirium.Wesensedachanceforvictorybutourchance lookedtohavegonebeforewewon itdeep intoinjurytimeattheend.Thistime,Mitrovicturnedprovider,steeringWijnaldum’sballintothepathofPerezwhostruckhisshotperfectlytoseeitsqueezepastLlorisandnestleinthebackofthenet.Class.

Newcastle United – Eliott, Janmaat, Mbemba, Coloccini, Dummett, Anita (Gouffran), Sissoko, Colback, Wijnaldum, de Jong (Perez), Cisse (Mitrovic).

Our Fans – 9 – Cock(erel) a-hoop

www.true-faith.co.uk tf 47

Their Fans – 6 – Second only to Chelsea in the Cockney

knobhead stakes.

Media View – ‘Perez grabs late winner to lift McLaren’s

side’ (Telegraph).

In-Form – The introduction of Perez and Mitrovic up front

turned the game...

Out of Form – ...mainly because Cisse and de Jong were

gash before they went off.

McClaren Watch – Back to back wins against top ten

sides. Heady days.

www.true-faith.co.uktf 48

NEWCASTLE UNITED 1 ASTON VILLA 1St James’ Park, Sat 19th Dec 2015, 5.30pm, Premier League, Att: 48,234.

WefailedtobuildonthebackofourtwohighlyimpressivevictorieswithonlyapointagainstapisspoorVillasideinapoorgamethatwestillshouldhavewon.Withhalfofthecountryunderwater,thegamedidn’tlooklikeitwasgoingtogoaheadanditlookedoddsontobeabandonedcominguptohalftimewhenwetooktheleadthroughanunlikelysource.DeJongputoveragrasscuttercorneranditfoundColocciniatthebackpostandhisshotwentinviaapoorattemptatastopbyGuzan.

Weshouldhavewrapped itupafter thebreakwhen thebloodyawfuldeJongnoddedwidefromaboutayardoutwith an open goal to aim out.Absolutely shocking missfrom one of my least favourite players, which is reallysayingsomethinginthissideandtheylevelledshortlyafterwhenAyewlashedafineshothome.Worryingly,bothsidesseemedsemi-contentwithapointbutwestillhadchancesto win it late on, Perez missing the best chance at thedeathbutallinallitwasapoorafternoon’sworkagainstrelegationcertainties.

Newcastle United – Eliott, Janmaat, Mbemba, Coloccini, Dummett, Anita (Thauvin), Sissoko, Colback, Wijnaldum, de Jong (Perez), Cisse (Mitrovic).

Our Fans – 6 – Nervous.

Their Fans – 7 – Thought they were supportive of a shocking side. Still can’t wait till they go down.

Media View – ‘Magpies pay the price for missed chances’ (Chronicle).

In-Form – Colo has been better of late and the goal was a bonus.

Out of Form – De Jong is a waste of time, fuck him off asap.

McClaren Watch – Back to being underwhelmed.

NEWCASTLE UNITED 0 EVERTON 1St James’ Park, Sat 26th Dec 2015, 5.30pm, Att: 51,682.

Afrustratingafternoonsawusleaveemptyhandedwhenwe deserved a point, albeit no more than that despiteMcLaren’s post-match claims that we should have hadthree.Inreality,wehardlyhadakickforthefirsthalfhourbeforeMitrovicglancedaheaderwidefromagreatpositionin front of goal. Wijnaldum also headed wide when helookedaslikelytoscoreandwecontinuedourmomentumintothesecondhalf,whenwewerewellontopforthe20minutesorsoafterthebreak.

WehadafantasticchancetotaketheleadonthehourbutagainMitrovicdemonstratedhispossessionofafiftypencehead when he headed wide from a fine Sissoko run andcrosswhenhewasnomorethansixyardsoutwithHowardcompletelybeaten.Terriblemissandour‘SweetandTenderHooligan’lookslikehe’sgotsweetfuckallchanceofgettinghalfadozengoalsthisseason,nevermindthe15orsowelikelyneedtokeepusup.Concedinginthelastminuteofinjurytimewasacruelblowand itwasatrulyshitgoal,Cleverley managing to head in from the edge of the 18yardboxoverthreeinchtallRobEliottandtwostatuesquedefendersontheline.Baaals.

Weare,ineverywayarottenfootballclubatpresent.

Newcastle United – Eliott, Janmaat, Mbemba, Coloccini, Dummett, Anita, Sissoko, Colback, Wijnaldum, Perez (Thauvin), Mitrovic.

Our Fans – 5 – Not much Christmas cheer to be had.

Their Fans – 7 – Excellent turnout but not as noisy as usual.

Media View – Late Cleverley header stuns Magpies in dour conditions’ (Express).

In-Form – Mbemba is starting to look like a top defender.

Out of Form – Mitrovic is starting to look like a big fucking plank.

McClaren Watch – Grinning while we bear it.

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WEST BROM 0 NEWCASTLE UNITED 1The Hawthorns , Mon 28th Dec 2015, 3.00pm, Att: 26,313.

We bid good riddance to 2015 with a suitably awfulperformance, losing to a shitWest Brom side and againlookingcompletelygoalshyinapoorgame.Wehuffedandpuffedandprobablyhadthebetterofthefirsthalf–ColohitthebarandGinihadadecentchancebutfailedtobeatthekeeperwhenput throughongoalbut itwasagameshortonqualityandclearchances.Darlowwaspitchedinfor his debut shortly before kick off because of an Eliottfeeling‘ill’–neeideawhatsortofillnesskepthimoutlike,butwefeltilleverytimeaballcameovertoDarlowashereprisedtheghostofJakAlnwickpast.

Thesecondhalfwasnobetter–MitrovicshouldhavehadapenaltybutotherwisewasabigplankandDummetthitthebaraswellbut lostthegametoanabsoluteshocker– Fletcher’s tame header squirming beneath Darlow togift them victory. The noisy away support vented theirfrustration with the side and the rotten club at the end.Whatayear,eh?

Newcastle United – Darlow, Janmaat, Mbemba, Coloccini, Dummett, Anita (Tiote), Sissoko, Colback (Thauvin), Wijnaldum, Perez (de Jong), Mitrovic.

Our Fans – 8 – Team is undeserving of them.

Their Fans – 6 – Canny enough bunch.

Media View – Fed up Newcastle fans boo their team off’ (Star).

In-Form – Christ, nee-one really.

Out of Form – We were collectively shite but Darlow had a nightmare in goal.

McClaren Watch – Difficult to see how he’s going to get us out of the bottom three.

ARSENAL 1 NEWCASTLE UNITED 0Emirates Stadium, Sat 2nd Jan 2016, 3.00pm, Att: 59,257.

Well, at least we’re finding varied ways to lose games Isupposeasweplayedverywellhereandstillendedupwithnowt.Wewerebyfarthebettersideinthefirsthalfagainsttheleagueleadersandhadahandfulofgoodchancestogo in at thebreakaheadbutMitrovic fromanoverheadkick came close, Mbemba should have done better andWijnaldum had the best chance, firing straight at Cechfromabackpass.HethenhadourbestchanceofthegamejustafterhalftimewhenPerezslippedhiminwithalovelypassbutagainheshotstraightatthekeeper.Mitrovicthencontrivedtokneetheballoverfromaboutaninchout–tobefairthecrossfromPerezcaughthimabitunawarebutfuckmeman,weshouldhavebeenoutofsight.

Needlesstosay,theywonitfromadaftgoalwhenPerezwenttosleepfromacornerandKoscielnynippedinbehindhimtopoketheballpastEliott.Westillhadchancestolevelbutourlackofagoalscorerisgoingtosendusdown,it’sassimpleasthatandadefeatisadefeat,nomatterhowwellyou’veplayed.Desperatetimes.

Newcastle United – Eliott, Janmaat, Mbemba, Coloccini, Dummett, Tiote (de Jong), Sissoko, Colback (Thauvin), Wijnaldum, Perez, Mitrovic.

Our Fans – 6 – Came in hope more than expectation.

Their Fans – 6 – You wouldn’t think they were top of the league.

Media View – Koscielny shows instinct of a striker as Gunners march on’ (Mail).

In-Form –

Out of Form –

McClaren Watch – No points for gallant losers. And we are losers under him at the minute.

WATFORD 1 NEWCASTLE UNITED 0Vicarage Road, Sat 9th Jan 2016, 3.00pm, Att: 18,259.

It’stimetoseeifwecanstartoptingoutoftheFACupaswebowedoutatthefirstavailableopportunityforthe63rdtime ina row,whenGeorgeRobledowasthe lastUnitedplayertoscoreawinnerinanFACuptie.Eyebrowswereraisedbythe‘strength’oftheteamnamed.Isaystrength,itwasstillbroadlyshitbutitwasalsoprettymuchourfirstteamwithMbabubuteventhatwasn’tenoughtobeataWatfordsidethatrestedmoreplayersthanus.

ThefirsthalfwaspisspoorbutwehadgoodchancesfromWijnaldum and a lumbering Mitrovic before they wentaheadjustbeforehalftimethankstoalaughablegoalfromDeeney,whocouldhardlybelievehisluckwhenWijnaldumplayed a suicidal backpass that he was able to intercepttoroundEliottandslothome.Wehuffedandpuffedabitin the second half but really our only threat came fromSissoko trying to run through players, with guile in shortsupply.HealmostplayedinMitrovic,whoseacceleration,akin to a supertanker wasn’t enough to connect andsubstituteThauvintookabreakfromrollingaroundonthefloor,beingbooedandavoidinganysortofresponsibilitytotoepokeaneffortintothesidenettingatthedeathbutitwasn’tenough.

WhatdoesthissayaboutMcLaren?PardewrightlyneverrecoveredfromStevenageandBrighton,beforegoingontoathousandmoreoffences.Wheredoeshegofromhere?

Newcastle United – Eliott, Janmaat, Mbemba, Coloccini (Lascelles), Dummett, Tiote (de Jong), Sissoko, Mbabu (Thauvin), Wijnaldum, Perez, Mitrovic.

Our Fans – 6 – Furious, fed up.

Their Fans – 5 – Barely noticed.

Media View – ‘Fans turn on Thauvin and Ashley after cup defeat’ (Shields Gazette).

In-Form – It comes to something when you choose Sissoko, for putting a shift in.

Out of Form – Thauvin got the majority of the abuse when he came on but there were a few dismal performances – Mitrovic looks two fucking stone overweight and ten year older than he is. Shite.

McClaren Watch – I don’t know whether the fact he played a full strength team is in his favour or damns him even further. Pathetic.

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NEWCASTLE UNITED 1 MAN UTD 1

St James’ Park, Tue 12th Jan 2016, 7.45pm, Att: 49,673.

Whatwasbilledasthemostboring game in the worldin the build up actuallyendedupbeingathrilleraswesharedsixgoalswitharopey looking Man Unitedside.Given that we barely

scoreandtheybarelyconcede,wegotoff toabadstartwhen Mike Dean, who was fucking minging all nightawardedthesoftestofpenaltiestothemforanMbembahandballinsidetenminutes.Rooneyscoredandwecouldbarelygetholdoftheballinthefirsthalfhour.Thingsgotworse when they went two up through Lingaard shortlybefore thebreak.Wijnaldum thenhada great chance toequalisebutfiredstraightatdeGeabeforehittingthetargetafewminuteslatertosendusinwithashoutathalftime.

Wewereadifferentsideinthesecondhalfandthoroughlydeservedourequaliser–ourfirstpenaltyin36yearswhichwas awarded when Mitrovic got pulled owa by Smallingfrom a corner.The big Serb stroked the spot kick awayandwebatteredthemforatenminutespellbutcouldn’tconvert.WelookedtohavebeenrobbedofapointwhenRooney curled a fantastic effort home from the edge oftheboxwithjusttenminutesleftbutthedeflationintheground turned to elation when Dummett of all peoplelashedhomealooseballinfrontoftheGallowgateinthelastminute.Homedrawsarenogoodinthegrandschemeofthingsbuttherewassatisfactionintheperformanceandspiritafterthe‘efforts’we’veputinoflate.

Newcastle United – Eliott, Janmaat, Mbemba, Coloccini, Dummett, Tiote (Toney), Sissoko, Colback (Gouffran), Wijnaldum, Perez (de Jong), Mitrovic.

Our Fans – 7 – Noisy in the second half, moribund in the first (courtesy A.Partridge).

Their Fans – 6 – Andy Cole and Shearer songs a-plenty.

Media View – ‘Cracking comeback earns Magpies a point’ (Chronicle).

In-Form – Wijnaldum was fantastic again – our best player this season by a mile.

Out of Form – Perez isn’t at the level he has been, which to be fair is excellent.

McClaren Watch – Things seemed to markedly improve after half time, to his credit.

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NEWCASTLE UNITED 2 WEST HAM UTD 1St James’ Park, Sat 18th Jan 2016, 3.00pm, Att: 50,031.

A longoverdueandmuchneededwincappedanall tooraregoodweekforNUFCandweproperlypaggeredthemforthefirsthalfhourwiththefeelgoodfactorofhavinga midfielder who can pass a ball more than three yardsin a straight line and in a forward direction clear for alltosee.Shelveyplayedakeyroleinbothgoals–thefirstwasabeautyashepickedoutWijnaldum,whosecutelayoffwascurledhomeexpertlybyyoungAyoze–satisfyinggoalallroundandgreattoseethelittlefellabackonthescoresheet.ThesecondwasevenbetterasShelveypickedoutJanmaatwithapinpoint50yardcrossfieldballwhichthefullbacktookontherunandpulledbackforWijnaldumtosmashhome.Twoupinsideaquarterofanhouranditcouldhavebeenatleastacouplemorebeforehalftime.

TheycamebackinthesecondhalfandpulledonebackjustafterthebreakthroughJelavicbutwewereasdangerousastheywereasthegamedrewonandbutforsomewastefulfinishing,wecouldhavewonmorecomfortably.Thatwouldbe splittinghairs though, itwasa farbetterperformanceandthingsfeelabitbetterallofasudden,despitethefactwe’restillfirmlyintheclarts.

Newcastle United – Eliott, Janmaat, Mbemba, Coloccini, Dummett (Saivet), Shelvey, Sissoko, Colback, Wijnaldum, Perez (Gouffran), Mitrovic (Lascelles).

Our Fans – 8 – Something to shout about at long last.

Their Fans – 6 – Plenty of them but pretty quiet.

Media View – Shelvey stars on Magpies debut’ (Independent).

In-Form – Shelvey had a great debut, but Gini was the man again.

Out of Form – No-one had a bad game. Saivet looked a bit off the pace for his half hour cameo.

McClaren Watch – It’s been a good week for him – good signing and good results, he has to build on it.

WATFORD 2 NEWCASTLE UNITED 1Vicarage Road, Sat 23rd Jan 2016, 3.00pm, Att: 20,611.

Annnnnd back to the drawing board. I didn’t feel goodaboutthiswhentheteamsheetwasannounced,McLarenisalwaysdesperatetodropPerez,theprickbuttobringinAaronswhohasbarelykickedaballallseasoninhisplaceafterscoringlastweek?Lascellesatfullback,Saivetstraightintothemiddle–fairenoughthosetwowereforcedbutwelookeddisjointedalthoughitwasthealltoofamiliarfailingsthatcostus–Ginigoingmissingawayfromhome,MittyWhitehurst incapableofscoring inabrothelwithtwentypoundnotestiedroundhischopper,shitedefending,fallingasleepinthefiveminutesafterthebreak–thereforalltoseeandWatfordtookadvantagetobreaktheirownrunofpoorformtobeatusfortheTHIRDtimethisseason.

Imightaswelljustcutandpastefromtheotherreports–Mitrovichadourbestchanceinthefirsthalfandcouldhavescored,Ighalotookadvantageofthefactwe’dbeentakingwobblyeggsathalftimeandscoredwithinamillisecondoftherestart,Cathcartgotanotheraftersomemiserabledefending andalthough Lascelles pulledonebackwith afineheader,wewereleftplantedinthebottomthree.Eightdaystobuyaminimumofonetopclassstriker,isn’tgoingtohappensowe’regoingdown.

Newcastle United – Eliott, Janmaat, Mbemba, Coloccini (Riviere), Lascelles, Saivet (Perez), Shelvey, Sissoko , Wijnaldum, Aarons (Gouffran), Mitrovic.

Our Fans – 7 – In pretty good voice with a clawing sense of déjà vu.

Their Fans – 6 – Inoffensive enough.

Media View – ‘What now for United after damaging defeat?’ (Chronicle).

In-Form – Difficult to pick anyone out – possibly Lascelles if only for the header

Out of Form – Gouffran was a disgrace when he came on.

McClaren Watch – Fed up with the usual ‘we played well, we’ll be fine’ dogshit after the match, he called the line up completely wrong and is presiding over us being relegated. Fuck off.

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EVERTON 3 NEWCASTLE UNITED 0Goodison Park, Sat 6th Feb, 3:00pm, Premier League, Att: 36,061.

So where does that rank in our shittest performances ofthelastshittyfiveyears?I’dhaveitinthetophalfdozenatleastasweabsolutelystanktheplaceout,beingluckyto get awaywith just threeputpastus in anabsolutelyshambolicperformance.Theformationwasalltopotfromthewordgo,withPerezparkedupfrontasalonestrikeranditwasaminormiraclethatweonlywentinonedowntoaLennongoalinthefirsthalfastheycompletelydominated.And let’s bear inmind that theywere on a dreadful runthemselvesandshortonconfidence.

Thesecondhalfwasnobetteratallandagain,itwasonlya surprise that it took themuntil so late in thegame toget the goals to kill us off, both from the spot. Aarons,ludicrouslybroughtonathalftimetoreplaceDummettatleftback,ludicrouslyhauledLennondowntoallowBarkleytoconvertfromthespotandthenLascellesgothimselfsentoffininjurytimeafterhackingdownBarkley.ThistimehechippedinhisspotkickandIfeltsorryforEliott–therestofthemcanallgoandfuckoff.Ohandwe’venowgotthreedefendersinjured/suspendedfortheweekend.Still,atleastwe’vegotstrengthindepthhey?Dreadfulnight.

Newcastle United – Eliott, Janmaat, Mbemba (Lascelles), Coloccini, Dummett (Aarons), Shelvey, Saivet (Mitrovic), Sissoko, Wijnaldum, Townsend, Perez.

Our Fans – 5 – Tired ‘Scouser’ songbook.

Their Fans – 6 – Couldn’t believe their luck.

Media View – ‘Barkley shines as Toffees get back on track’ (Mirror).

In-Form – Eliott is the only one to emerge with any credit, saving us an embarrassing scoreline.

Out of Form – Wijnaldum might as well not bother getting on the bus for the aways, Sissoko was MIA and Dummett was abject. The others were different shades of shite.

McClaren Watch – If he honestly thinks, as he suggested after the game that the scoreline flattered Everton, he needs his head looking at. And his fucking hair.

NEWCASTLE UNITED 1 WEST BROM 0 St. James Park, Sat 6th Feb, 3:00pm, Premier League, Att: 50,152.

AmustwinthatwewongotusoutofthebottomthreeandleftusscratchingourheadsastohowthefuckWestBromhavegotanypoints,letalone29,theywerethatbad.Wewerethebettersideforninetyminutes,hadthreegoodhalf chances in the first quarter of an hour and thoughtwe’d taken the lead on the half hour, butTiote had hisswervingeffortfromoutsidethearearuledoutforoffside.The injusticedidn’t last longasMitrovickepthisheadtocoollyconvertalovelypassfromShelvey,whoseallroundplayisimprovingus.

We should really have had another three in the secondhalf–Wijnaldumheadedoverwhenheshouldhavescored,Townsend hit the post and Sissoko shot just wide andAlbionresembledapubside,withloadsofoverweightladshumping the ball aimlessly up front. They nearly got acompletelyundeservedequaliseratthedeathbutRondonfluffedhis lineswhenhecouldhavesquaredforBerahinobutintheendwewerewellworthourvictory.WeneedanotherfivefromsomewherebeforethemiddleofMay.

Newcastle United – Eliott, Janmaat, Taylor, Coloccini, Aarons, Shelvey (Saivet), Sissoko, Tiote , Wijnaldum, Townsend (Perez), Mitrovic.

Our Fans – 6 – Plentiful, nervy, ultimately relieved.

Their Fans – 3 – As nondescript as their team.

Media View – ‘Mitrovic ends drought to haul Magpies out of drop zone’ (Express).

In-Form – Janmaat was excellent going forward, pretty much everyone played well though.

Out of Form – Wijnaldum was quiet.

McClaren Watch – By God did he need a win here and he got it.

Gareth Harrison - Follow Gareth on @truefaith1892

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Online merchandising operation

truefaith1892.bigcartel.com

COUNTY DURHAM WE ARE THE MAGS

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OnSaturdaymorning(beforetheWestHamgame),thetfweeklypodladswerekindlyinvitedtotakepartinagameoffootballandchatwithNUFCheroRobertLee.Weweretreatedtoaroundrobinof7-asidefootball,withRobtakingaturnoneachteamfollowedbyacasualQ&AwithsomegreatstoriestoldabouttheNUFCofthe90s(whenweweregood!).

A KICK-A-ROUND WITH ROB LEE

The event, jointlyorganisedbyPlay with a LegendandLast Night of Freedom was terrificallyrunandwasaresoundingsuccess. Josh and thelads did a great job ofrunning the event whilsttakingtimetoengageandinvolveeverybodythere.

As clichéd as it sounds,Rob Lee was a real gent.Everything I would haveexpectedfromoneofmy

childhoodheroesandhowan NUFC captain shouldbe! It’s hard to imagineyour modern footballerinteracting with fans inthe same way. Can ColoevenspeakEnglishyet??

The FootyPlayed at Soccer Leaguein Gateshead, each sidegot a couple of shortgames with the mainman involved. In trueEntertainers style, with

RobontheTrueFaithsidewe had some ludicrousresults. First game, TFabsolutely dominatedwith Rob Lee in themiddle - about 10 shotson target in the space ofa12minutegame....Finalscore, 0-4, obviously.Thegoalkeeper and eventual‘manof the tourney’ hadourlives.

Game2,aswewereshortof numbers, Rob Lee

Simon Campbell (tf Weekly POD)

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kindlystayedonourteamand some wrongs wererighted! Courtesy of a Si(Pod)screamerandaRobLee Penalty, a 3-0 winbooked our place in thefinal.

Inallseriousness,at49,andnearly twice the averageageofour team,RobLeeput us all to shame. He’sstill got it! Touch andpass that (before seeingShelveythatday)noneofthecurrentNUFCmidfieldcomecloseto.

Rob joined up with thelegendsladsagainforthefinalwhichtheyeventuallywon on penalties. Nonamesmentionedforwhomissedfortf.

After the GameAfteraquickphotosessionwith the group (some of

us looking disgracefullyworse for wear after45minsofexercise)WeallgottositdowntoaQ&Asession with everyonebeforeRobkindlyallowedus to do a few morequestions,recordedjustfortrue faith. Some crackingstories of better times atUnited. Amazing to hearhowdifferentthingswerejust20yearsago.Playersgetting mortal weekly– which was perfectlyfine ‘as long as we werewinning’; David Batty,absolutelyhatingtraining.

The most humblingstories he had were ofKevinKeeganandhowhe‘made every player feel10 foot tall going outon to the pitch before agame’.Afurtherreminder,if needed, of how unique

andbrilliantKevinKeeganwasandis.

Can you imagine SteveMcClaren instilling thatkindoffeelingintheladstoday? Giving VurnonAnita the confidence tomatch theYayaTourés ofthe modern game? No.Notachance.

Seriously though, acrackingeventandthanksagaintoboththeorganisers@ P l a y w i t h a L e g e n dand @LNOF. I wouldrecommendbothfortheirgreat efforts in providinga memorable day. Thiswas made better still bya class performance andfucking vital win overWestHam.

You can listen to Micky’sinterview with Rob Lee here.

In all seriousness, at 49, and nearly twice the average age of our team, Rob Lee put us all to shame. He’s still got it!

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Cartoons

www.true-faith.co.uk

a small proportion thatwhenYohanCabayecomesto mind, on the oppositeend of the scale comesRemy Cabella, RomainAmalfitano,Yoan Gouffranandthelikes.

While the arrivalShelvey isn’t aguaranteed nordefinitive endpoint of ourcurrent policy, it’ssignificant inthefactatsomelevel within theclub change hasnot only beensignalled- but followedthrough. Furthermore,with rumours ofbids tabled forT o t t e n h a m ’ sAndros TownsendandwantawayWestBromrogueSaidoBerahino,itseemsencouraginglylikelyGrahamCarrancoarenowgoing for Premier Leagueproven quality ratherthan the aforementionedunknown quantities- andmy word, not a momenttoosoon.

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MarkHaddonisbestknownforpenningtheawardwinningnovel‘TheCuriousIncidentoftheDogintheNight-time’.Thebookisfullofintrigue,plottwistsandconfusion,wherebytheendingremindsusanawfullotoftheintroduction.Youmightcallitsatisfyingsymmetry.However,I’mfarmoreinterestedinthetaleofJonjoShelvey,ataleyoucouldcall‘TheCuriousIncidentoftheOutcastatTheSwans’.It’sastoryfullofintrigue,plottwistsandconfusion,wherebytheendingisnothingatallliketheintroduction.Addinagoodmixtureofpromiseandhope;miseryandwoe;ecstasyandanguish,andyou’dbeforgivenforthinkingMrShelveyandNewcastleUnitedareasomewhatperfectfit

Introduction:

JONJO SHELVEY

Jonjo Shelvey is a playerwhoneedsnointroduction.He’s made quite theimpression since hisreported £12m move totheNorthEastfromfellowstrugglers Swansea, andarrivesatStJames’switharatherchequeredhistory.Aplayer who has been bothwonderful and woeful in

equal measure, Shelveydeparts Swansea with apoint to prove. There arebothgoodandbadaspectstothistransfer,wecanonlyhopethatintimethegoodfaroutweighsthebad.

OneofthebiggestpositivesofthistransferisthatJonjoShelvey represents a steminthetideofforeigninfluxthat has so frustrated fansforthelastfiveorsixyears.Whilst a proportion havebeen a success, it’s such

LIAM NORRIS

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It gets better than that,though.SinceYohanCabayejumped ship, quite literally,to join PSG in January2014, everything that wasgood about Newcastlefast dried up. Goals driedup, the defence becameleakier than the rockbeds of Lake Windermere,and our form dippeddramatically,culminatinginthe situation we currentlyfind ourselves in- zerocreativeedgeandscrappingin a second consecutiverelegation dogfight. WhatShelveybringsusisnotjustknowledge of the PremierLeague, grit, character andfight,butcreativityinbagsfull.There’snodoubtaboutit,theboycanplay.

During his time in theearly part of his career atCharlton Athletic, Shelveywouldn’t just creategoals, but he would scorethem too- something usMagpies would soon findout ourselves during hisLiverpoolandSwanseadays.Hemadeahugeimpressionduring his time at TheAddicks, who at the timewere used to slumming itat the bottom end ofThe

Championship- not muchhasreallychangedinrecenttimes on that front mind.In the two years he spentat The Valley, he featuredin42leaguegames,scoringseven times. Itwasn’t longbefore Shelvey attractedsomewhat more desirablesuitors,anditwasacertainMerseyside club that wonthechaseforhissignature.

Shelveysignedforperennialbig-heads Liverpoolfor £1.7m in May 2010,having been convincedby then Liverpool gafferRafael Benitez that theupcoming 2010-11 seasonwas ‘going to be theiryear’. Benitez resignedtwo months later. Puttingthe managerial merry-go-round of Liverpool to oneside,ShelveyspenttheearlypartofhisRedscareerouton loan, briefly having asuccessfulspellatBlackpool,beforebeingrecalledduetoLiverpool’s massive injurywoes. During his threeseasons on Merseyside,Shelvey impressed hugely,but couldn’t quite naildown a starting elevenplace consistently enoughunder Roy Hodgson and

later Brendan Rodgers.It was midway throughhis time at Liverpool thatShelvey was called up totheEnglandsquad,makinghisdebut inOctober2012againstSanMarino.Hardlyworld beaters, but a startnonetheless.Liverpoolcouldbe viewed as a big stepslightly too soon.While itwasapparent intime,withthe right coaching andguidance, Shelvey coulddo it at the top level, age,poor temperament andbad timing led to an exit,170 miles South and ajump across the border toSwanseawasnext,andthisis where the Shelvey storybecomesclouded, colludedandawfullyconfusing.

The question has to beasked- What the hellhappened at Swansea?Signed in July 2013 fromLiverpool for a reportedinitial fee of £5m, Shelveyand Swansea seemed acatch. Swansea needed athoroughbred playmaker,a passing craftsman, whileShelvey needed a PremierLeague club on the up,wherehecouldsettle,growandcementhisplaceinthe

Shelvey and Swansea seemed a catch. Swansea needed a thoroughbred playmaker, a passing craftsman...

England fold. What couldpossiblygowrong?

Well,itallstartedverywell,actually.InhisdebutseasonatTheLiberty,Shelveyfastsettled into life at ThePremier League’s mostsuccessful foreign club,scoringsixfromhismidfieldhub, while assisting seveninaseasonwhichsawTheSwansfinish12th,ahandfulof points and a couple ofplaceslowerthanourselves.So far, so good. Thefollowing season, however,iswherethingsbegintogetconfusing. Having firmlycementedhimselfasafirstteam regular and a fansfavourite, Shelvey had theworld at his feet. EnjoyingEngland call ups and firstteam football inwhatwasa very good footballingside under Gary Monk,fromtheoutsideitseemedShelveycoulddonowrong.From the inside, however,rumours of a bad attitudeand a hellish ego wererife, and again his Achillesheel appeared to be histemperament- somethingwhichMonkhadnoqualmsabout criticising in a verypublicmannerinJanuaryoflast year. Disciplinary andattitudeconcernsaside,lastseasonprovedtobeanotherextremely fruitful one forShelvey, scoring three andsetting up six as Swanseasoared to an all-time highofeight-puttingNewcastlefirmlyintheshade.

2015/16hasbeenthemostbaffling, unpredictableseason in Premier Leaguehistory. Undisputed. JonjoShelvey is a metaphor for

how England’s top flightcan be summed up sofar this term. Dropped bySwansea for poor formand bad attitude, goes onto be man of the matchfor England in Septemberagainst San Marino. Quitesimply, bizarre. After beingdroppedbySwanseabeforethe Man City game thisseason, Shelvey reportedlyrangSwanschairmanHuwJenkins almost in tearsasking what was going on.His reply was somethingalong the lines of “yourheadsnotinagoodstate”,and that was seeminglythat. Confusing really. Allplayers have dips in formand it very much seemsShelveyhasbeenoutedasthe fall guy for Swansea’satrocious fall this season.Unfair? Justified? You’rebetter of asking those inSouth Wales what theythinkofJonjoShelvey’sexitfromTheLibertyStadium.

Whilst it’s great to see asix-time capped Englandinternationalarrivethroughthe door, Shelvey does sowith a ratherwreckedanddoggedreputation,atemperas shortashishaircutandhaving been branded withan awful attitude- soundsawfully familiar doesn’tit… Joey Barton, anyone?WecanonlyhopeShelveysettlesanawfullotquickerand calmly than Scousegob-shiteBartondid.

JonjoShelveycouldwellbeNewcastleUnited’ssaviour.Finally we have a YohanCabaye-esque player, whonot only has talent, but amassive point to prove. It

can only bode well for usthat Shelvey’s parting gifttoSwanseawasawarning,a warning that the Welshside have made a hugemistake in letting him go,andthathe’llflyhighwiththeMagpies.It’saclichéinfootballthatwhenaplayermovesclubshedoessowitha point to prove. Judgingby his debut performanceagainst West Ham, JonjoShelvey seems determined

toseehispointgetsacross.The start is good.The taleof JonjoShelveycontinues,I for one hope that, muchlike ‘The Curious Incidentof the Dog in the Night-time’, the end mirrors thebeginning. As I surmisedat the start- satisfyingsymmetry. Itwouldbe theperfect remedy to whatso far has been an almostfatal season for NewcastleUnited

www.true-faith.co.uktf 60

Jonjo Shelvey could well be Newcastle United’s saviour. Finally we have a Yohan Cabaye-esque player, who not only has talent, but a massive point to prove.

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tf 62 www.true-faith.co.uk

Herewegoagain.Thejoysofanotherseason

battlingitoutwithsuchillustriousfootballgiants

asBournemouth,NorwichandSunderlandtoavoid

anotherignominiousdroptotheChampionship.

Afterourpracticerunlastseason,we’reobviously

attemptingtogoonebetterin2016.

But to be fair to the club,they are showing somesignsofatleastattemptingtoremaininthetopflight.At the time of writing,Henri Saivet and JonjoShelvey have arrived for£16m. Rumours (probablystarted by Lee Charnley)are that more will follow(what’s Shefti Kuqi up tonowadays?).

Sohowmuchwilltheclubspend in January? Well,second guessing MikeAshleyisnevereasy.

Inthepast,hisstrategywasto spend on the basis ofwhattheycouldafford(i.e.they wouldn’t spend anymore than they earnedthrough their variousincome streams). That’sresulted in profits in thelast four sets of publishedaccounts.

When we were relegated in 2009, the impact on our finances were pretty shocking - a £33.6m or 39% drop in our income

MONEY AND SHARE ANDREW

TROBE

In Januaryhowever, I thinktheir spending will bedrivenbyadifferentfactor.That factor is the amountof money that they couldpotentially lose in incomeif they are relegated. Inother words, they will notbeconcernedaboutmakinga relatively small loss thisseason because relegationwill result in an absolutelycolossallossnextseason.

So what would relegationcosttheclub?

The financial costs ofrelegationhaveneverbeenhigher. When we wererelegated in 2009, theimpact on our financeswere pretty shocking - a£33.6mor39%dropinourincome.

And that was just oneseason. If we hadn’tbounced straight back,that % drop would havegot progressively worse assponsors dropped away,parachutepaymentsceased

08/09 £m 09/10 £m Change £m % Change

Match Day 29.0 20.9 -8.1 -28%

Media 37.6 16.1 -21.5 -57%

Commercial 19.4 15.4 -4.0 -21%

Operating income 86.0 52.4 -33.6 -39%

www.true-faith.co.uk tf 63

So a relegated club will probably lose over £80m in media income every season.Ouch.

andevenourstoicsupportwaned.

Andsincethenthecostofrelegationhasgotawholelot worse. And the reasonit’s got worse is down totheTVdeals.That’schangedeverything.Letmeexplain.

Media Whilstrelegatedteamswillreceive£65minparachutepayments (over 4 years),the TV income in theChampionship is buttonscompared to the PremierLeague’s.UnderthecurrentTV deal, Premier Leagueclubs are guaranteed aminimum £63m a seasonin the Premier (made upof merit money, facilityfeesandTV income).Nextseason that’s estimated toriseto£99m!Soarelegatedclubwillprobablyloseover£80m in media incomeeveryseason.Ouch.

And when you considerthat£99m isestimated tobe the minimum mediaincome for a Premier club(i.e.fortheLeague’sbottomclub),thecostsofrelegationin reality are likely to bemuch higher. For example,each place you climb upthe Premier League table,currently earns a club anextra£1.2mmeritpayment.So the costs of relegationcompared to even a mid-table finish will be in the

region of £100m in mediapaymentsalone.

Whilsttheimpactoflosingtheir premier league TVmoney would be prettydire for Newcastle, thereareclubswhowouldsufferevengreaterconsequences.The more reliant on TVmoney, the more severetheimpact.Thetablebelowshows the percentage ofturnover generated by TVincomein13/14.

CrystalPalace 81%

Hull 79%

Cardiff 78%

Stoke 77%

WestBrom 76%

Swansea 75%

Southampton 73%

Everton 71%

Sunderland 69%

Fulham 69%

Norwich 68%

WestHam 64%

AstonVilla 62%

NewcastleUtd 60%

Tottenham 50%

Liverpool 38%

Arsenal 31%

Chelsea 29%

ManCity 28%

ManUtd 21%

Match DayNewcastle’s attendancesheldup remarkablywell inthe Championship whenwe were last relegated.The average attendancedropped from 48,750 to43,388 (an 11% drop).When you consider thelower away followings inthe Championship thenthat means over 90% ofNUFC fans stuck by theirteam.Stunningsupport.

However whilst averageattendancesdroppedbyonly11%, match day incomereduced by 28%. And thisdespite an additional fourhome games. This has tobe down to prices. It’s aninferior product in thechampionship (though notnecessarily less enjoyable)andthepricesreflectthat.

Newcastle’s last reportedmatch day income was£25.9m(13/14).Ifrelegationresulted in another 28%reduction then thatmeanstheclubwouldsufferahitofover£7m.

CommercialIt is now commonplacefor sponsorship deals tohave clauses that pay outa lot less in the event ofrelegation.

With our last relegation,commercial revenuedropped by 21% from

tf 64 www.true-faith.co.uk

£19.4m to £15.4m in theChampionship. NorthernRock’s extended deal wasworth only £2.5m (abouthalf the previous contractof£4.8m).

In my opinion, Newcastleare still suffering for thatrelegationnow.Despitefiveconsecutive years in thetop flight, our commercialrevenue has only justrecovered to that pre-relegation total (althoughwe haven’t yet had the14/15figures).In2007,ourcommercial revenue wasgreater than Tottenham’s.Nowit’slessthanathird.

We are still unable tocommand the commercialdeals that the‘big6’ clubscan negotiate. And thereasonforthatisthatwe’rearelativelynewlypromotedclub. It’s about the club’sprofile. We simply haven’tgotthecommercialmuscleofthetopclubstodemandthe big money. The clubsthat command the bigcommercial deals are themost successful. Certainlynot those that have beenrelegated recently andbattle relegations on aperennialbasis.

Playing staffWell run, profitable clubsin the Premier League will

suddenly face huge lossesintheChampionship.Thisisthe commercial risk facingall but the top sides. Dothey gamble on investingin theplayingsquadordothey attempt to maintaintheirpremier leaguestatusonachampionshipbudget?

Take Swansea. Generallyregardedasamodelclubfortheir finances, they madea £21m profit in 12/13(up from £17m in 11/12)and have no debt. But ifthey were to be relegatedthensuddenlytheseprofitswouldbe transformed intomassivelosses.

Tomitigateagainstthisrisk,clubshaveaddedrelegationclausestoplayers’contractswhich substantially reducetheirwagesintheeventofthedrop.

Ofcourse,Newcastleneveranticipated their relegationin2009andhadtopaytheircontractual obligations infull. I’m always tickled bythe myth that Newcastledeterminedly held on toa core of players in thechampionship which theyhad expertly assessed ashaving the character toreturn the club to the topflight.Thetruth is thattheplayerswekeptwerethosewecouldn’toffloadasclubs

weren’tpreparedtomatch

theirwages.Whoonearth

in their right mind would

pay £50k a week forAlan

Smith? Er, apart from us,

obviously.

Financial compensation

A further costwhichmost

clubs are likely to incur

when relegated is the

compensationpaidtotheir

manager (and back room

staff) after the inevitable

dismissal. In 2009, we

paid out compensation of

£5.3maswewentthrough

a managerial merry-go-

round. Presumably sacking

McLarenandhisstaffwould

costsomethingsimilar.

Debt

Despite huge cost cutting

afterrelegation,Newcastle’s

netdebtrocketedby£43m

to £150m in 2010. It’s

since reduced to less than

£100m. Relegation would

seethedebtrocketagain.

Summary

IfNewcastle get relegated,

the cost to the club will

benorthof£100m.Ashley

will be acutely aware of

this.Hewon’tspendtogive

Newcastlesupportersaside

theycanbeproudof.He’ll

spend because of the fear

ofwhathemightlose.

In my opinion, Newcastle are still suffering for that relegation now. Despite five consecutive years in the top flight, our commercial revenue has only just recovered to that pre-relegation total

www.true-faith.co.uk tf 65

Long standing true

faith writer, Tony

Higgins who regular

readerswillrecognise

from his Real Spain

articles has his first

bookoutnow.Travel

with Tony through

the undergrowth

of Spanish football

and life for only

£4:99.Onlyindigital

format.

Pelé‘s story is one that transcends your average rags-to-riches, kid-from-the-backstreet-to-global-superstar, fairy tale. In fact, his story beggars belief. So when the editor asked me to give it a bash I rolled my sleeves up, hit the books, and pieced together the journey of the little black kid from the backwaters of Minas Gerais to FIFA Player of the Century as best I could.

Edson Arantes doNascimento was born inthe rural state of MinasGerais in the small townof Três Corações (‘ThreeHearts’). His father, JoãoRamos do Nascimento,nicknamed Dondinho, wasaplayerofsomeabilitywhoplayed for various smallclubs around Minas Geraisstate.Dondinhomovedhisfamily to the dilapidatedneighbourhoodofBauru inSãoPaulowhereheplayedforBauruAtléticoClubeuntilligament damage forced

him into retirementat theage of 35. Dondinho wasdesperate for youngEdsonto follow in his footstepsbut his wife, Celeste,constantly reminded hersonoftheprecariouslifeafootballer leads: the familywere in constant moneytrouble due to Dondinho’sinability to earn a decentliving. SheurgedEdsontopursueacareerinmedicineorteaching.

It was obvious that Edson,then known as Dico, was

agiftedplayer. His father,obviously chuffed, advised,guided and encouragedhis son. It was at aroundthis time,whenEdsonwasabout 8 years old, that hepicked up the nickname‘Pelé’. I’ve heard variousstorieswhereitcamefrombut it’s most likely that itcame from young Edson’smispronunciation of thenameofhisfavouriteplayeratthetime,VascodaGamagoalkeeper,Bilé.Peléclaimsto have forgotten exactlyhow he earned his new

monikeranditsoundslikeitwasn’t complimentary, butthe more Edson objected,themoreitstuck.

Despite the teasing hereceived from his peers,Pelé began to dominatethe local football scene.The amateur teams heplayed for were winningtournaments around thecity and young Pelé wasgettingnoticed.Attheageof13hewastakenonattheyouth team at his father’sclub, Bauru, where he was

www.true-faith.co.uktf 66

JOHN MILTON Follow on @ GeordiocaO Rei The boy

from brazil

www.true-faith.co.uk tf 67

coached by Waldemir deBrito – an ex-player whohadrepresentedhiscountryat the 1934 World Cup.WithPeléleadingtheteam,Bauru won 3 state youthchampionships between1954-56.

In1956Brito tookhis starplayer to the port city ofSantos for a trial with OsPeixes.AfterasingletrainingsessionSantos signedPelé,he would stay with theclub for the following 20years. Pelé scored againstCorinthiansinhisfirstgameattheageofjust15,bythetimethe1957CampeonatoPaulista (São Paulo StateChampionship)started,thenow16yearoldhadbrokeninto the first team andwas getting regular starts.Although Santos wouldlosetheirtitletoSãoPauloFC the boy wonder didn’tfail to impress, ending thetournamentastopscorer.

DespitesettingthePaulistafootballworldalightduringhis debut season, Peléwas a complete unknown

to the wider Brazilianfootball community. Aswell as being without thetelevisionsaturationofthesport that we have today,therewasalsononationalChampionship. Until thefirst national league wasestablished in 1971 it wasthe State Championshipswhich were the be-all andend-all to clubs and fansalike. Each Championshipwas played out in almostcomplete isolation withonly the results of thestrongesttournaments(theCarioca (Rio de Janeiro)and Paulista) attractingattention.WithCariocaandPaulistafootballdominatingtheBraziliangame,itislittlewonder that the nationalteam was made up fromthe cream of these twotournaments.

Pelé had made hisbreakthroughattheperfectmoment–astopscorerinthe Paulista just one yearbefore the World Cup, hehad caught the attentionofBrazil’srotund,jovialand

maverick coach – VicenteFeola. Today Feola has areputation as being toorelaxed, for allowing hissenior players to run histeams,andforeventakingnaps on the bench duringtraining sessions andmatches. However, thatreputation is beginning tobechallengedtoday,mainlybe the players who hadplayedforhim.Feola,aboveall else, was an innovator.How else can you explainhis decision to include anunknown17yearoldonhisquesttogaintheHolyGrailofBrazilianfootball?

Onthedaythesquadforthe’58 World Cup in Swedenwas announced there waswidespread confusion andscratchingofheadsalloverBrazil.EventhestarsoftheCarioca tournament werebemused, Mário Zagalloand his colleagues fromRio nudged each other onseeing the little black kidfromSantosatthetrainingcamp – ‘Quem é ele?’,‘Who’s he?’, they asked

eachother.Theyweresoontofindout.

That squad was the bestprepared squad in thehistory of football at thattime. They added Sovietstyle sports scienceto their natural SouthAmerican flair. They tookan army of backroomstaff including physios,doctors, dentists and evena psychologist. Luckily for

www.true-faith.co.uktf 68

world football, Feola knewfar more about footballthan Dr. João Carvalhaes:the psychologist declaredGarrincha too naïve andPelétoo immaturetoplay.Feolaalsoknewquiteabitaboutkidology. Hidinghissecret weapons during thefirst two group games (a3-0 win over Austria anda 0-0 draw with England)he unleashed what wouldbe Brazil’s greatest everattacking partnership,Garrincha and Pelé, inBrazil’s must-win groupgame against the fanciedandfearedSovietUnion.

To keep his opponentsguessing Feola linedhis team up in randompositions while journalistsvisited during trainingsessions, meaning nobodyknewwhattoexpectwhenPelé and Garrincha tookto the field. What theygot has been describedas the greatest 3 minutesof football ever playedas Brazil launched waveafter wave of attack fromthe get-go, usually downthe right hand side with

Garrincha obliterating theSoviet left back time andagain. With the legendaryforwards Didi and Vavábolstered with Brazil’s twonewestsuperstars,VaváwasabletoputbothgoalspastLevYashinintheSovietnetfora2-0win.

Waleswerenextup intheQuarter Finals but werewithoutJohnCharles,whileBrazil were without theinjuredVavá,meaningevenmore pressure on Pelé toperform for his country.Despite plenty of intentfrom the canarinhos thegame remained 0-0 tillmidway through the 2ndhalfwhen,withhisbacktogoal, Pelé received a passfrom Didi. He controlledwith his chest, swivelled,knockeditpasthisdefenderandburiedintothebottomcorner for his first everWorldCupgoal. ThatgoalwasenoughasBrazilmovedontotheSemi-Finalwherea formidable France, andeventual tournament topscorer Just Fontaine, werewaiting.

Report of Pele’s ‘chapeu’

‘58 Final

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www.true-faith.co.uktf 70

Vavá was restored to theteamandBrazilwereready.Vavá scored in the 2ndminuteandallseemedwelluntil Fontaine equalisedjust 7 minutes later. Theperceived mental fragilityof the Brazilians cameunderscrutiny–thankfully,however, Didi scored anabsolute Thunderbastard™beforehalf time to restoreBrazil’s lead. 2-1 and thegamelookedinthebalance,butnobodyhadcalculated-inthePeléfactor.Grabbingthegamebytheproverbialscruff of the neck, theyoungster grabbed a23-minute, 2nd half hat-trickasFrancewereblownaway. An 83rd minutegoal by Piatoni was hardlyconsolation as the gamefinished5-2.

Into the finals and Brazilfacedthebiggestthreattotheir dominance to date.No,notthehosts,Sweden,who had also made it tothefinal,buttheirownself-doubt. Brazilians are aninsanelysuperstitiousbreedandtheirsuperstitionswerealmost their undoing. Ashosts, Sweden rightfullyrequested to wear theiryellow shirts, but Brazilrefused to acquiesce. Itbecame quite ugly as the

CBFrefusedtobackdown.Eventually a coin-toss wasagreed upon and justicewas seen as Sweden wonit. Panic spread quicklythrough the Brazil campuntilaquick-thinkingtrainerbegged some spare shirtsfrom the French squad.Handing the modifiedstrips to the team he toldthemitwasablessing:thebluewasthecolourof thepatronsaintofBrazil,NossaSenhoradeAparecido.

Sweden scored a quickgoal which really knockedthe stuffing out of Brazil,but the imperious captain,Bellini, slowly picked theball out of the net andcalmlywalked to the spot.By the time he had giventhe ball to the forwardstheteamhadsettled.Vaváscoredtwogoals (bothsetup by Garrincha) beforePeléscoredathird.Zagalloadded a fourth beforeSweden pulled one backthrough Simonsson. Pelérose in the 90th minuteto score with his head –a goal that would providewonderful symmetry withhis exploits in1970. Withthe goal came the finalwhistle: 5-2. Brazil wereWorldChampions!

While Garrincha wasconfused(“Isthatit?Butinthe Carioca we play themtwice!”) the moment wasnot lost on the baby ofthe team. Pelé, overcomewith emotion, could notcope with what had justhappened.Hebrokedownin floods of tears, imagesof the boy burying hisface ingoalkeeperGilmar’sshoulders as he sobbeduncontrollably endearedhim to football fans theworldover.

Having left Brazil as anunknown 17 year old,Pelé returnedasthemostfamous player on theplanet. Now dubbed oRei (The King) he wouldbereceivedlikeapopstarwhereverhewent.Luckily,unlike so many otherfootballinggreats,Peléwaswellpreparedforfame.Hehad a fantastic attitudeandwas fullyawareofallthetrappingsoflifeinthepubliceye.Hisemergencecoincided with that ofGarrincha,theywouldplaytogether for the nationalteam until 1966 duringwhich time Brazil didn’tlose a single game whentheyplayedtogether–anastoundingfeat.

Benfica x Santos Pele x Portugal, ’66

Having left Brazil as an unknown 17 year old, Pelé returned as the most famous player on the planet. Now dubbed o Rei (The King) he would be received like a pop star wherever he went

www.true-faith.co.uk tf 71

Although many (myselfincluded) argue thatGarrincha was betterplayer, Peléwasby far themost professional of thetwo. In fact, these twolegends could not havebeen more different fromeach other off the pitch.While Garrincha has beendescribed as the mostunprofessional professionalto have played the game,Pelé was always a coach’sdream. Garrincha wouldgoon5daybendersbeforewaking up on a Sundayafternoon and destroyingwhichever unfortunate leftback was up against himthat day (he usually didn’thave a clue who he wasfacing) before meeting upwithhismates todo it allagain.Pelétrainedhard,hetook care of his body, heunderstood tactics and heknewhisworth.Garrinchareliedonhisnaturalabilityand enjoyed the highlife, Pelé worked hard toimproveoneveryaspectofhisgame.

By the 1966 World CupGarrincha was overweight,knackeredwithinjuriesandstrugglingwithalcohol.He

was finished. Pelé wouldhaveanotherWorldCupinhim.

Backto1958andPeléwasnow a global brand and aone that his club, Santos,wereeagertoexploit.Theywentonepictours,usuallyaround Europe, where thepublicwouldpaytopdollartoseetheboywonder. Inthe 4 years before the ’62World Cup Pelé played ahuge amount of gamesandthegoalskeptcoming.After his debut season in1957,Peléwoulddominatethe Paulista scoring charts,ending as top scorer in 9consecutive seasons from’57-’65 (including anastonishing58goalsinthe1958 tournament). Addedto this were his goals ontour and for his country –he won the golden bootatthe1959SouthAmericaChampionships with 8goals.

Bythetimethe1962WorldCupcamearoundPeléwasinhotform–thiswasmeantto be his tournament.Unfortunately, by thenmost teams had given uptrying to find a legitimateway of stopping him and

he had become a markedman. In Brazil’s openinggroupgameagainstMexicoPeléscoredthe2ndina2-0win but in the next gameagainst Czechoslovakia hetore a hamstring and histournamentwasover.NotonlywasthisadisasterforBrazil,but itwasadisasterfor FIFA, too – Pelé wasthestarattraction!Nottoworry–Garrincha steppedout of Pelé’s shadowsand took responsibility.He inspired his team anddid what only one otherplayerhaseverdone:singlehandedlywonaWorldCup.

Pelé, although obviouslydisappointed, was asgracious and humbleas ever – he has alwaysthanked that team forwinning theCup,“WithoutGarrinchaIwouldnotbea3timeWorldChampion.”Itwas this humility that hadendearedPelétotheworldanditwouldbethisattitudethat would continue tocement his place in fan’sheartsaroundtheworld.

Despitethedisappointmentof ’62, fans didn’t have towait long for Pelé to begiven the chance to shine

“Without Garrincha I would not be a 3 time World Champion.”

www.true-faith.co.uktf 72

on the international stage.Santos won the 1962Copa Libertadores (theSouth American versionof theChampions League)puttingthemupagainsttheEuropean giants, Benfica,in the IntercontinentalCup. In the 2-legged finalPelé would be up againstthe player dubbed ‘TheEuropeanPelé’–Eusébio.

The first legwasplayedatRio’s Maracanã, it was anervyaffairwithsomecut-and-thrust. WhileEurope’spretender failed to score,the real deal scored 2 inSantos’3-2victory.

In the return leg, held inthe real Estadio da Luz(Stadium of Light) Peléwould play what he hasdescribed as his greatestever game. In a blisteringdisplay of raw power,deft touch and positionalawareness Pelé produceddribbles,back-heeledpassesand tricks galore as he

single-handedly temperedBenfica’ssoaringpre-matchconfidence. By the timeEurope’s finest were ableto get to grips with theSouthAmericans and theirrampaging forward theywere already trailing bytwoPelégoals. Wherehisfirst was a simple slidingconversion,his secondwasa stroke of genius – aftera feint allowed him to gopast his first marker hissheerstrengthallowedhimtopowerpast2defenders,despite stumbling, beforesmashing a left foot shotinto the bottom rightcorner. His feints anddummies continued tocause consternation,constantlyghostingpastorpoweringthroughgroupsof3or4defendersatatime.

He continued to tormenthis opponents in the2nd half, which allowedCoutinho a simple tap-inafter being left in acres ofspace in the Benfica box

– the Portuguese by nowbeingcompletelytransfixedon Pelé. Pelé’s hat-trickcamewith thegoalof thetie. Collecting the balljust insidehisownhalf hedribbled and powered hiswaypast4BenficaplayersintotheboxbeforehisshotwassavedbyPereiraintheBenfica net, but the goaliecould only parry, allowingPelé to pick up the piecesand slot home. Pepescored Santos’ fifth beforeEusébio and Santana gotconsolationsinthefinal10minutes.PeléwasaWorldChampionagain,followinganow-familiar5-2scoreline.

ThefollowingyearfollowedasimilarpatternforSantos–they successfully defendedtheir Libertadores titlewhich meant they wouldface AC Milan in defenceof their Intercontinentalcrown. In the first legSantos lost 4-2 in Milan,O rei getting both goalsbefore suffering an injury

www.true-faith.co.uk tf 73

whichruledhimoutofthereturn leg. Despite thisblow,histeamreversedthescoreline, notching a 4-2win at theMaracanã. Thedecider was played in thesamestadiumanditwasavicious affair as the Italianteam, including Trappatoniand Maldini gave as goodastheygot,indeedcaptainMaldiniwas sentoff alongwithSantos’Ismael.Santosgot the goal they neededthrough Dalmo and theywere now considered themost formidable side inworldfootball,andPelétheundisputedking.

In the period betweenPelé’s breakthrough untilthe ’66World Cup Santosbuiltadynastytorivalthatof Europe’s best – in theirall-white strips and hugesuccessitislittlewonderthattheywerecalled‘TheSouthAmericanRealMadrid’.Thisgolden era brought them2 x Intercontinental Cups,2 x Libertadores and 6 xPaulistatitles.AndPeléwasthebeatingheartofitall.

1966 is black hole inBrazilian football, firmlyplacedinthe‘bestforgotten

about’ column. MostBraziliansdon’tknowwhenEngland won their WorldCup because it happenedat this tournament. Peléwas at the height of hispowers. He was 25 andhad been top-scorer inthe Campeonato Paulistafor the ninth time. ButunlikePelé,theseleçãowasnowherenearready.Feolahad been hastily draftedin at the last minute, themeticulous preparationandattentiontodetailthathad accompanied the ’58and ’62victorieshadbeenabandoned and the squadwaslargelymadeupoftheveterans of the previouscampaign. They were outof shape, aging and ill-prepared for the rigoursof tournament football.Garrinchainparticularwasashadowofhisformerself– having been ravaged byinjuryandalcohol.

Itwasadisasterfromwhichthecoach’sreputation,andthoseofmanyofhissquad,wouldneverrecover.

It is said that Pelécarried an injury into thetournament, we can’t be

surehowaccuratethatis,whatwedoknow is thatBrazilwereabject.All3oftheirgroupgameswereatGoodison.InthefirstgameBulgariawerebeaten2-0,both Pelé and Garrincharolledbacktheyearswitha goal apiece, bringinghope that experiencewouldbeenough.Itwas,however, a false dawn.Theylost3-1toHungarybefore Eusébio camelooking for revenge withPortugal.TheyknewtheycouldbeatthisBrazilsideand they weren’t wrong.Another 3-1 defeat andthe defending championsweresenthome.

Pelé and Brazil havealways maintained thatthis World Cup was tooaggressive, that theofficialsallowedtoomuch

physicality,andtheymight

have a point. Pelé had

been left unprotected in

all3gamesbefore finally

suffering an injury that

wouldrulehimoutforthe

coming months having

beenkickedmercilesslyby

thePortuguese.

He trudged down the

tunnelhavingbeenunable

tofinishthegame.Hewas

dejectedanddespondent.

Disgusted with what had

happened, looking back

at the pitch he made his

mind up that he would

walk away from football.

Heresolvednevertoplay

agameoffootballagain.

Gratefully, this wouldn’t

be the last chapter in

Pelé’sphenomenalstory.

To be continued...

Song – O nome do rei é Pelé (Jorge Bem Jor)

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Going Down?AsIsithereaheadofwhatIsee–asanabsolutelycrucialFACup3rdroundfixtureforNewcastleatVicarageRoadtomorrow,Ifindmyselfastoundedatthenumberofmagswhowouldhappilyseeusgetbeat.ItwouldappearthatMikeAshleyandCharnley’snonsensicalpropagandahasfinallycaveddownthewallsofhope,belief,anddreamsinsomeofourfanbase.Thereislittleproofthatgoingonacuprunimpactsonformintheleague,andinfact–lookingatthepastfewyearsofearlycupexitsonTyneside,thattheoryisalmostturnedonitsend.

Rich

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We haven’t made it past the 3rd roundin the past four years, and look howgoodourleagueperformancewas–nearlythree relegations in that period.Anyway,howdoesthisalllinktomyarticle?Well,regardlessofourFACupperformancethisseason, we find ourselves in an all toofamiliar sticky spot with relation to ourtop-flight status. In 17th position at thehalfwaypointofthecampaign,areUnitedfinallygoingtobedoomedforthedivisiontheyhaveflirtedwithinrecentyears?

Where do we stand right now?Probablythemostblackandwhitewayofevaluatingourpredicamentistolookatourcurrentleagueposition,andcomparethistorecentmiserableseasons.FollowingourdefeatatArsenal,wefindourselvesnestledin17thposition,twopointsaheadofthemackems, but more crucially, two pointsbehind16thplacedSwansea.Arguably,weareaboutninepointsawayfromapositionof comfort given the current standings.Perhaps worthy of note is our miserablegoal difference, which given the numberofpoorsidesintheleaguethisyearcouldend up being a critical factor. It speaksvolumeswhenpre-seasonrelegationcerts

Bournemouthhaveafour-goalcushionon our goal difference. So how

doesthiscomparetootherseasons?Wellexactly

a year ago itwas a

starkcontrast.Unitedsatin10thpositionon 27 points, a comfortable 10 pointsfrom the drop zone. A pretty mediocreseven wins had been achieved, yet thatlooks momentous when benchmarkedagainstthisseasonsreturnoffour.Weallknow what happened afterwards underthe desperate watch of Carver, howeverour position at this point in 2015 lookslikeacomfortblanketcomparedto2016’ssheetofnewspaper.

Lookingatleaguepositionfurther,perhapsa more tangible comparison would beto look at where we were after twentyfixtures in the relegation campaign of08/09. Depressingly – we were furtherahead than where we were now by acrucial five points in fourteenth positionwithapaltry five victories.Toput it intoLehmann’sterms,weareinaworseleaguepositionnowthanwehaveeverbeensinceour involvement in the Premier League.Gulp.

The Form BookWhilst I’m a firm believer that leaguepositiondoesnottellanylies,cananyhopebe scraped from our form this season?Looking at the previous ten matches,Unitedhaswonthree,drawntwo,andlost five.Overthecourseofaseason,thistypeofformwouldPROBABLYsee you

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Looking at the six clubs around us – United have beaten only two of them after the first round of fixtures, with two losses, and two draws.

safe–witharoughmentalcalculation seeing a returnof close to 40 points. Itsnot as transparent as thathowever, as if you sawunited return the samesecond half of the seasonto their first – that wouldsee a total return of 34points. That total wouldhaveseenusrelegatedlastyear.Wecantakeheartthatourbetterformthisseasonhas came against the socalledstrongersides intheleague–pickingupmassivevictories in recent weeksagainstLiverpoolandSpurs.Theproblemis,ourPremierLeague safety will not bebasedonusgainingsurprisevictoriesagainstthisprofileof side, but against theclubswhomwearebattlingwith inthebottomhalfofthetable.Lookingatthesixclubs around us – Unitedhave beaten only two ofthem after the first roundoffixtures,withtwolosses,and two draws. It’s a fairold mixed bag against theweakestsidesinthedivision,and therefore probably

quite telling of where wefind ourselves. Ultimately,without meaning to statethe obvious- in order tosurvivethedrop–Newcastleneedtomassively improvetheirform.23pointsstandbetweentheircurrenttotalandthemagic40,whichtokeepthingssimple–wouldneed United to doublethe number of wins theyachievedinthefirsthalfofthecampaign.

Our relegation rivalsI always balk at thecomment which getspushed out every seasonfrom certain corners that“youshouldn’tbeconcernedabout the results of otherclubs – worry about yourown team”. Given thatrelegationbattlesarealwaysfundamentally about howmany points other teamsachieve,thenthisstatementisutterbollocks.Whenyourteam is struggling to pickpointsuponthepitch,theONLY thing you can restyour laurels on is hopingthat your relegation rivalsdo not steal a lead on

you. I’ve already eluded tothe state of the quality ofother sides in the bottompit of the Premier League,and that has to be seenasaglimmerofhope.Villahavesomehowmanagedtorelegatethemselvesalready,and the mackems-despitebeatingusagainareastoiletasever.Whilst thebookiesarenighoncertainthatourlocal rivalsaredestinedforthedropthisyear,you’dbea fool to forget how theyhavemanagedtosomehowpull themselves out ofsimilar drastic positionstimeandtimeagain.Oftendown to new managersyndrome admittedly, butthe reality is that theyhave the experience ofpulling themselves out oftroublewhentheyneedto.Swansea are a team on arapiddeclineasfarasleagueposition is concerned,and rolling the dice bysticking with caretakermanager Curtis has an airof the ‘Carver’ about it.Bournemouth frustratinglyhasstartedtopickupform

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when you would typicallyassume it to be the otherwayaround.Ican’thelpbutfeelthattheirlackofsquadquality will finally take itstoll however – similar toBurnley in 09/10. Norwichare again a side who havestarted to pick up form inthepastfourweeks,andyouwouldassumeChelseawillstart climbing the leaguenow. Taking this all in toconsideration, unlike lastseason–wearen’tblessedwithaplethoraof sides tofightitoutwithasitstands.

What about us…?Well in small bursts,we have seen theimprovements in playingstyle compared to thedrosswehavebeenservedup in previous seasons.Whereas last season, itwashardtocomeupwithawordtodescribeUnited’splaying style – McClareninparts,hasgivenusmoreofanidentity.Thetruthof

thematteristhatplayingstylecountsforverylittlewhen you aren’t scoringgoals whilst concedingthem–something,whichour Head Coach appearsreluctant to admit.We have the strongestsquad we have had since2012/2013,andonpaper– a lot better than theclubs around us. Despitethat, the same gapingholeswearesickandtiredofcomplainingaboutstillexist in our playing staff.Lack of options at theback , limited creativityinthemiddleofthepark,and nobody putting theball in the back of thenet up front.Add to thisour desperate lack ofquality Premier Leaguehardened experience, andalarmbellswillringwhenpinning hopes on playerswhohavelittleknow-howof grappling out of thesesituations. Whilst clearlydisillusioned and pissed

offathowanotherseasonhasendeduplikethis,thefans are not (yet) in asmuch revolt against theteamandmanagerastheywere with Pardew andCarver. The team needsto give something backtotheundeservedsupporttheygetweekafterweek.

To summariseWeighing all of the aboveup, the future does looksomewhat bleak as far asour Premier League statusis concerned. Being in aposition we have neverfound ourselves in beforeatthisstageofacampaignistestamentinitselftothejob the club have in frontof them for the secondhalf of this season. TheJanuary transfer windowis absolutely crucial toour fortunes movingforward, with muchstrengthening required.Something tells me nottoholdmybreath.

The January transfer window is absolutely crucial to our fortunes moving forward, with much strengthening required.

www.true-faith.co.uk tf 77

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COULDA, WOULDA SHOULDA.

ForyearsthetransfermarkethasbeenaperiodofhopeandwonderforNewcastleUnitedfans.ThedreamsoflandingthenextShearer,CabayeorLaurentRobert.Unitedsowner,theshrewdandruthlesssportinggoodschainownerMikeAshleyhashadthewoolpulledoverhiseyesbyincompetentsenioroperatorsattheclub.

Itbegsthequestion.Whatifwehad somecompetencyinplace.PersonallyIdreamof local legend and Godof the Geordies AlanShearer in a director offootball role. Somebodywho understands the fans,and can seek recruitmentand would garnishrespect from agents andownersalike.

The likes of Joe Kinnear,DennisWise,DerekLlambiasand Lee Charnley. Menwho were given jobs tohandle player recruitmentwiththeassistanceofchiefscoutGrahamCarrforone

of the wealthiest clubs intheworldhadnobusinessin doing so. Frankly Iwouldn’t let themoperate a toasterlet alone NewcastleUnited.

Looking backthrough the years theabsolute cock ups andinexcusable mistakesthat have beenmade by this club.Surely unbeknownst toMikeAshleyinthetransferwindowwhoisalwayskeenon turning a profit fromplayer sales makes onethink.Didhejusthandthe

John BrownFollow @downt0wn

www.true-faith.co.uk tf 79

keys to St. James Park totheseidiots.

It wasn’t until this pastsummer we saw someproper investment inthe club. Investments thatshould have been madeoverthelastfiveyears.Butwhat’sevenmoreamazingisthedealswejust“couldn’tgetovertheline”let’shavealookatsomeofthebiggernames that slipped awayby offering pathetic andderisory offers who haveallturnedouttobequalityplayers. It’s just not howbusinessisdone.

Newcastle were heavilylinkedwithaDutch strikerwho, inevitably arrived atthe NUFC on loan by thenameofLuukDeJong.Wewere heavily linked withhim in the summer of2012,whereadditionsweresurelyneededgoingintotheEuropa leagueonthebackofawonderseasonneverofus will forget. The sumsbeing bandied about wereanywherefrom8-10millionpounds. Ironically then,manager Steve McClarenof FCTwente was holdingout for a sum closer to£15millionforhis21yeargoal scorer who netted25 times in the Eredivisie.When we picked him up

onloanhewasoutofformand never given a properchance under the tutelageof Alan Pardew and hassinceguidedhiscountrytoa title and through to theknockout round of thechampionsleague

Secondly, many willremember whenrecruitments were broughtin to fend off relegationin our Europa leagueseason. Legend has itthat Mike Ashley wasdirectly involved in therather swift recruitmentof Haidara, Sissoko,Mbiwa and the like in theJanuary window of 2013.Many forget that wewere tipped for a doubleswoopfornowindemandstriker Pierre EmerickAubameyang and fellowSt. Etienne defensiveprodigyKurtZouma.Weofferedareportedmeasly€10.5 million for thelatter. Looking back nowit’supsettingtothinkwhatcould have been, and nodoubt the profit Mr.Ashleycraves.Youwouldn’targueifhewentfor£30millionplusnow.

This one hurts, Loic Remy.ThemanwhogotwhiskedawayfromourgraspbyQPRinalastminute180move

for more money. Is he amercenary,damnright.Butin today’sgameallplayersare. The man who arrivedfinallyonTynesideforaloanspell that saw him singlehandedly keep Newcastlesafe had a very minimal£8.5 million buy outclause in his contract. Alittle ambition from ourhierarchy would have hadthemovemadepermanent.He’sanaturalgoal scorerwho,muchlikeDemba

Ba has seen his talentswasted on the Chelseabench. Bothofwhichnowseem to have realized thegrass isn’t always greener.Oh how we could usehisgoalsnow!

The rumour mill tears attheheartsofNUFCfansallovertheplanetwithnameslike Wilfiried Bony, DelleAlli and the list goes onthatwe’vebeenlinkedwithover the years that haveprovedtocomegood.Withalittleforesightimaginetheteamwewouldbefielding.

FlukeseasonsthatsawusinEuropeunderPardewwouldnolongerbeoneoffs,butratherbecomethe expectation. ThiswindowmaybeMikeAshley’s last chanceto make a mends,most fans afterwatching his shockinterview gavehim another

chance after somebig promises to

come good. Moneywasfinallyspentbut I feartoo little to late. Fingerscrossedfellowsupportersofourgreatclubthatwegetout of our mess that hasbeen brought on solely byineptitude in the transfermarket.

we were tipped for a double swoop for now in demand striker Pierre Emerick Aubameyang and fellow St. Etienne defensive prodigy Kurt Zouma. We offered a reported measly €10.5 million for the latter.

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AND RADIO SHOW

Inlatteryears,thetruefaithPodcastshavebecomeoneofthemostpopularelementsofourcontent.NowledbyPod-Father,AlexHurstandhisPod-Squadwearenowputtingoutregularepisodestoanever-growingbandoflistenersacrosstheBlack&Whiteplanet.TheyarebecomingMASSIF.

The Podcasts regularly

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Our listeners tell us they

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podcastsasacontributor,

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More recently, the

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PostcardsFromThe EdgePaully

“IfIcandealwithHatemBenArfa,thenIcangetEmmanuelAdebayorplayingagain”,AlanPardew.Theaudacityofthissmarmybull-shitterisoutrageous.It’slikeJosefFritzlclaimingthathewasafantasticfather.It boils my urine that themedia don’t question thecomplete and utter tripethat comes out of his daftannoyinglips.Isuspectthatthey afford him a lot ofleewayduetothefactthatthere aren’t many rent-a-quote gobshite managersleft in the Premier Leaguewhat with Mourinho andSaggy Bracket now notmanaging. I’m intrigued toknowexactlywhathemeantby“dealwith”.WeallknowthatHBAisnotthecleanandsacred son of Jesus Christandhisheadcansometimes

becomeasfrazzledasanout of date packet ofFrazzles but Pardew’streatment of him wasdisgraceful. ‘The king’(as he has referred tohimself before in thepast) selected the likesof Gosling, both ofthe Ameobis, Obertan,Gouffran and Raylorto name some ahead

of HBA in his position.He completely ostracised

the most naturally-giftedfootballer that we havehad since Ginola and it’sa travesty that he’s stillnot ripping the bum-holesout of defenders for us.Tothink that we literally paidtogivehimawayandhaveso far spent £25 million

on two players to replacehimwhowehavedeemedare not good enough is aballs-upthatnotevenAlanPartridgecouldmuster.

I’ve said for a long timethat centre midfield wasourweakarea so I’mverypleased with the signingof Shelvey and we didextremely well to get himbefore Harry Potter got aholdofhim.We’vemissedacentremidfielderwhodrivesus on and who constantlylooks topass forwardeversincethedepartureofthatbeautiful Frenchman. He’salso a bit of radge packettoo like Cabaye which isa good thing in my book.With Shelvey in there, wecertainly won’t get bulliedin the middle of the parkevenifBullyfromBullseyeisplayingforouropponents.Anita and Wearside Jackare far too lightweight asa combination and offervirtually zero protectiontowards our centre halves.Thegingeroneshouldbeasquadplayeratbestandhealsoshouldhavehadthreeof his fingers chopped offwhen he signed for usbecause of that photo.Shelvey should improveour set-pieces but thenagain,arhinoconfinedtoa

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wheelchair could probably

deliver better crosses than

what we’ve produced over

the last few seasons. My

only concern with Shelvey

isthatduringanextremely

hot day, if his baldy nut

deflects the sun too much

ontoColo’spermthenthere

isagoingtobeaseverefire

whichcouldturnouttobe

catastrophic.Hopefully,the

presence of Mbemba with

his hair-free noggin near

Colowillstopthispotential

disastrous situation from

occurring.

The style of football that

we’re playing is the most

pleasingon themincepies

since Pardew stumbled

upon (and quickly got rid

of) that 4-3-3 with Ba,

Cisse and HBA causing

completepandemoniumup

top. There are no aimless

long ball hoofs and we

constantly try to play out

from the back. You have

to give Schteve credit for

sticking by his philosophy

even when results haven’t

been going our way. Our

recent performances have

warrantedalotmorepoints

tf 83www.true-faith.co.uk

than what we have gained

but if you fail to convert

simple chances then you

willgetpunished.Wecould

quite easily have taken

12 points from the four

matches that surrounded

theseasonofthefat,daft-

bearded, house-intruding,

redandwhitepig.DeJong

missed a virtual open-goal

header at 1-0 vsVilla and

I’m amazed that he didn’t

fracturehishairlineindoing

so.He’sprimedforaroleon

Casualty every week once

hehangshisbootsup(not

asadoctoreither).Mitrovic

did likewise with a similar

chanceathometoEverton

at0-0andweweredenied

a blatant penalty atWest

Bromwiththescoreat0-0

when Mitrovic was taken

to Suplex City by Brock

Lesnar. The biggest hat in

Hat-landisnotbigenough

to contain the chances

that we missed atArsenal

againat0-0withGini’sthe

easiestofthebunchandwe

weredulypunished.Weare

missing a natural finisher

andwesimplyhavetobring

somebodyinduringJanuary

becausewe’rethinnerthan

ananorexicstick insectup

top. It could well be the

differencebetweenstaying

upandgoingdown.

Very sad news that NUFC

diehard Cliffy Ahmed has

passed away. Anyone who

has travelled to away

matches over the years

will have definitely come

across him. He was an

eccentric who followed us

everywhere. I’ve been on

hundredsofbuseswithhim

andonetriptoHollandfor

thatratherlivelyUEFAcup

encounter in Breda stands

out.Itwasatriporganised

by another two NUFC

diehards who have both

alsosadlybeentakenaway,

Billy Swift and John the

Badge.Hedecidedtowrite

“For sex, phone Clifford”

withhisphonenumberon

to numerous beer mats

inside of a bar on the day

of thematch. I assumehe

didn’t receive any phone

calls because he hadn’t

included the international

code never mind the area

codeofhisphonenumber.

R.I.PCliffy.

Very sad news that

NUFC diehard

Cliffy Ahmed has

passed away.

Anyone who has

travelled to away

matches over the

years will have

definitely come across

him.

tf 84

Players: Lawrence, McCra-cken, Hudspeth, Curry, Low, Finlay, Aitken, Ward, Harris, Smailes, McIntosh, King, Hagan, Hampson, Mooney, Pyke, Dixon, Gray, Phillipson, Mitchell, Ramsey, McDonald, Roxburgh, Russell

Division: After finishing 8th last season, we improved somewhat this campaign, finishing 5th with 50 points from 42 games. We finished 9 points behind eventual champions Burnley.

Manager: New year, same old! The Directors Committee continued to pick the team for NUFC this season.

Trainer/Coach: James McPherson took the side

SEASON60 SECOND CHRIS

LAws

again this year.

Highest Attendance: An opening day 61,080 gate at home to WBA was our biggest league gate of the campaign. They saw us start the season with a 1-1 draw at home to the Baggies. Including cups, a mega gate of 62,073 turned out to see us play Liverpool in the 2nd round of the FA Cup in late-January. United won 1-0 thanks to a Neil Harris strike. The attendance was a record crowd at SJP. Fantastic.

Lowest Attendance: A gate of only 15,000 turned out to see our mid-April league clash at home to Bolton Wanderers, the size of the crowd quite a surprise con-sidering both sides were at the right end of the league (Bolton would go on to fin-

ish 3rd, 2 points above us). NUFC got the better of the game, winning a tight match 1-0.

Average Attendance: Around a 4,000 jump from last year, as Football began to settle back into the nation’s lives after the war. 41,243 was the average gate at SJP over the 21 league matches played. That figure jumps slightly when you fac-tor in our three FA Cup ties at SJP (Nottingham Forest x2, Liverpool) to 41,921. The Forest tie was originally scheduled for Nottingham but was moved to Tyneside in agreement. When the

www.true-faith.co.uk

first match ended in a draw, the replay took place, as it would, on Tyneside.

Best Win: One result stands head and shoulders above the rest. 09/Oct/1920; Newcastle United 6-1 Sunderland. Our biggest result over our rivals. It was a masterclass of attacking football from United, Stan Seymour, Smailes (2), Neil Harris (2) and Ted Ward all netting in the win. United would go on the week after to play Sunderland again, this time on Wearside, and com-plete the double, winning 2-0. Another six-star per-formance from United came later in the campaign, as we beat Manchester United 6-3 on New Year’s Day 1921.

Worst Defeat: There wasn’t one big defeat that got to United this year, it was more a culmination of poor results towards the end of the campaign that stopped NUFC’s title challenge in its tracks. In a one-month peri-od from mid March to mid April, United lost at home to Blackburn Rovers (1-2), Oldham Athletic (1-2), Derby County (0-1) and away to Bolton Wanderers (1-3). The campaign never got back on

track after it.

Something of Interest: Obviously, the derby dem-olition of Sunderland took centre stage this season, especially as United were in with a chance of title sil-verware for the majority of the campaign, being as high as third in early-April with 6 games left, only to fade away and finish in 5th place. The Liverpool cup game was also noteworthy, given the record attendance that was there that day, as Tyneside showed it’s passion for the FA Cup. After being rewarded with a 1-0 win, United were drawn against Everton away in the next round, and fell to a 3-0 defeat, being outclassed on the day by a team that would finish three points below us at the end of the season.

Mentioned in Dispatches: Newcastle were once again the big spenders this year, breaking their club record fee and also paying big bucks for a hat full of players. Neil Harris came in from Patrick Thistle for £3,300 (a club record) and would prove to be worth the outlay, finishing the club’s top goalscorer with 19 goals this season. County Durham native Stan Seymour returned to the North East after a very successful spell with Morton, £2,500 the fee. He’d finish the cam-paign with 10 strikes. Billy Aitken and Tom McDonald were bought from north of the border, at Rangers, for a combined fee of £4,500. NUFC suffered their first loss in 17 years on the continent this season, as FC Barcelona beat United 3-2 on 17th May in a post-season kickabout.

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National Interest: Car tax disks are introduced in early January.. Winston Churchill is appointed Colonial Secretary in February.. With unemployment now over one million people in the UK, the government announces an increase in unemployment benefit.. Tottenham Hostpur beat

Wolverhampton Wanderers 1-0 at Wembley in the FA Cup final.. The province of Northern Ireland is created in May this year within the UK.. The British Legion is found-ed as a voice for ex-service-men.. Unemployment rises once again, from one-mil-lion earlier in the year to

2.2m in the summer.. Bloody Sunday occurs in July, as clashes between Catholics and Protestants in Belfast result in 16 deaths.. On 11 November, the British Legion hold the first official poppy day.. The driest year in UK history happened in 1921, and it hasn’t been close to being broken since..

Regional Interest: The first council houses are built in Newcastle. They are part of the Government pledge to ex-servicemen of homes fit for heroes, an expression repeated with bitterness as unemployment rocketed in the North East. The after-math of the Easter Rising and the fight for Irish self-deter-mination was felt keenly on Tyneside, where there was long established a large community with strong Irish lineage. Numerous politi-cal groups proliferated with the Irish Self-Determination League strongly supported but Jarrow was also home to a specific IRA brigade and

officially recognised by the army council following an oath led by Liam McMahon. Richard Purcell became the Officer Commanding, Gilbert Barrington the Quartermaster, and Joseph Connolly the Adjutant. An inner circle also held mem-bership in the highly-se-cretive Irish Republican Brotherhood (IRB), includ-ing Purcell and Barrington. Women were not admitted to the IRA itself, but had their own organisation - Cumann na mBan (League of Women). There was a branch in Jarrow, under the leadership of Cissie Brennan. The Jarrow IRA bri-gade carried out numerous operations across Tyneside including bombing oil refin-eries and before the treaty was signed in Ireland there were plans to blow up the High Level Bridge. Several of the Jarrow IRA received pris-on sentences..

Chris Laws.

Follow @tflawsy1892

However football stats can

serve a purpose for us, the

lumpenproletariat.Whenin

visual formtheycanclarify

a situation better than any

outburst on Facebook or

Twitter. A case in point is

the rumoured new badge

forNewcastleUnited.Inmy

opinionthenewNewcastle

United badge should be a

HappyNewYearfellowsufferers!Asreadersofthiscolumnwillknow,

Iamnotfondoffootballstats.Thereisnothingtobegainedfrom

knowingfootballstats.Andweshouldrightlyscornanyonewhohas

theaffronttoaccostusoutsideGreggsandtellusaboutthevarying

directionsinwhichVurnonAnitakicksafootball.Andwhowishesto

wakescreaminginthenightwiththememoryofSammyAmeobi’s

crosscompletionrateonWyscout?Notme,Squire.Thisknowledgeis

fool’sgoldinanycase.Itwon’tsaveusfromtheravagesofIsilorthe

(neverending)bloodychocolateofferatWHSmiths.

“stat” in the form of a pie

chart.

A teacher friend once

showed me an assignment

from his school. The task

wastoshowhowpiecharts,

graphs,andthelikeworkas

a visual analysis.The visual

correlationoneofhispupils

chosewasthelinkbetween

fruit eating and differences

in hair colour. A herculean

taskyoumaythink,butno

stonewasunturnedinalong

report stuffed with graphs,

pie charts, the names of

many fruits, and the hair

colour of classmates. The

Achilles heel in the project

was, undoubtedly, the

evidence pertaining to the

depressing uniformity of

the class’s hair colour. Hair

colourwasdescribedthusin

a pie chart: “brown”, “light

brown”, “mostly brown”,

“dark brown”, “lighter than

average brown”, and “very

dark brown”. Realising

that something special

tf 86 www.true-faith.co.uk

Pie charts and badges

RICHARD FOSTER

Incendiary Magazine

was needed to divertattention away from thedamning evidence of saidchart, a discussion of themeritsofvariousfruitswasundertaken; (the raspberrybeingtoofullofseeds,andapples apparently provingindigestible) before aconclusion worthy of anymember of the Charnleyfamilywasdelivered.Towit:“Although the evidence Iusedhasprovedmewrong,my analysis was provedcorrect”.Thisismagnificent,andworthmuchmorethanthe1/10foreffortthatthereportreceived.

This pupil’s pie chart gotme thinking about theproposed new NewcastleUnited badge. Using thepie chart as our visualtemplate, the new badgecould encapsulate thecurrent state of affairsat the club, and can givean expert résumé for anypotential investors. Colourco-ordination is vital, as Iam sure youwill agree; soforthecolour,Ihavechosendogshitbrown.Thewordingonthebadge’spiesliceswillbeasfollows:“shit”,“terribleshit”, “mostly shit”, “deepshit”, “worse than averageshit”, and“very deep, dark,shit”.Astrongandaccurate

message,nodoubt.

Moorhens and Star WarsActually, thinking aboutthekid’spiechart remindsme of Newcastle United’srecent woeful displaysagainst the press. Forgetthe disappointments onthe pitch over the festiveseason, we need to knowwhat on earth is SteveMcClaren smoking beforethese pressers. Has hebeen reading Steve Black’smotivational notebooks intheBenton“ThroneRoom”?Recentforayshaveinvolvedstanding toe to toe withWest Bromwich Albion,refusingtogetsweptaway(probablytoHebdenBridge)and - most bafflingly - anassertionthat,heisfuriouslypaddling underneath acalm exterior. Becausehe has more information.About what, or paddlingwhere?Andinaboatorasa bird with webbed feet?That, we will never know.I fear Mr McClaren hasbeen watching the newStarWars film with SteveBlack and Bobby Moncuratsometerriblefestivegettogether, and now seeshimself as some kind ofknight fighting against theevils of a corrupt systemand an uncaring fanbase

whocan’t,orwon’t,seethe“real” Emmanuelle Rivierefor what he really, reallyis*.Maybetheinformationbeing kept secret is thatSteve McClaren’s torsostraddles dimensions;bravelypaddlingtokeepatleast half of his body inthe real world. Eschewingthe light sabre or starship,maybeMcClarenhasoptedto morph into a creaturethatishalfman,halfaquaticbird.Ifonlyhisplayerscouldsee how hard, and withwhat unyielding vigour hewaspaddling, andhowhisbackroom staff supportedhis paddling, then maybethey could paddle too.Onthe surface a Premiershipmanager, but beneatha cosmic incarnation ofbird and man; a worthysuccessor to Loki or Odin,butcursedbythefactthatonly an elect few see hispowersofmotivation.

It’s interesting the bird-related metaphor thatWor Manager picks.Not for Steve McClarenthe imperious cry of themajestic eagle, the swoopof the keen-eyed falcon,the rapscallion thieving ofthe crafty magpie, or the

mystic insightsofthewiseraven.No;wegetpaddlingwithacalmexterior,whichleavesuswithbadtemperednutcaseslikemuteswansordivers(akaloons),anykindof duck (for argument’ssake let’s at least pick anattractiveone,thepochard)or boring nonentities likecoot,grebe,ormoorhen.Fie,Sir! (Yet another indicationthatthestrictures imposedby Ashley’s proto-Stalinistregimecandrivepeople totalking utter rubbish.ThinkofyourfamilySteve.)

A Strip Too FarItseemsthatrecently,manypoordeludedMagsactuallyseeking entertainment,enjoyment and a smidgenof success from football(fancy that!) have resortedto following non, or lowerleague games. Whetherat Blyth, Spennymoor,Gateshead, North Shieldsor South Shields, there isa wide choice in the area.I too, am no stranger tothis trend. Ever since theFoster family seat movedsouthwestwards toLancashire, I have tackedmy“second club” pennanttothemastofthegoodshipAccrington Stanley. I can’t

we need to know what on earth is Steve McClaren smoking before these pressers

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really say The Reds have

given me that much room

tocheerovertheyears,but

Ihavemanyfondmemories

oftheCrownGround,some

very funny days out, and

some marvellous highs.

I also love the fact that

Newcastle East End wore

a red top (like Stanley’s)

and that East End was the

footballing club for Stanley

CC (Geddit!?!?). Historical

synchronicitymostblessèd.

Untilthisseason.Therehave

been dark changes afoot.

Firstly, the club’s ground

is now named the Wham

stadium;luckilyafterabrand

of plastic goods, not the

effete 1980s singing duo.

But still, the name brings

up queasy memories of

thoseappallingsongs,prissy

appearances onToppy, and

some fearful outfits. I can

live with that, however. But

what I draw the line at is

lookingatthenewkit.Iwon’t

offendmyreaders’sensibilities

with a picture. Suffice to say

it’sredandwhitestripes.How

darethey.HowcanIgonow?

This aversion to cheering on

ateamwearingthesecolours

has meant that (since living

in The Netherlands) I can’t

imagine paying to watch

Sparta Rotterdam (friendly,

cult club) or PSV Eindhoven.

I’mnotgoingbacktoStanley

till they get rid. And they’re

doing really well this season.

Buggeration.

*A new signing, of course!

Here are ten tunes and mixes

various that should consign

the Austin Maxi of 2015 to

the crusher of history.

The Sound of Belgium - New Beat mix 1

“Happy Birthday to You”

“Jingle Bells” - Pochonbo Electronic Ensemble (PRK)

Angelia Prince - No Bother With No Fuss

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Byron Lee & The Dragonaires - Love At First Sight

tf 89

Max Berlin - Elle et Moi

Pat Kelly - I’m Coming Home

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FirstspottedinSeptember1990forhisclubBanikOstravaina1-3UEFACupdefeatatAstonVilla,NewcastleUnitedmanagerJimSmithinvitedgoalkeeperPavelSrníčekforaonemonthtrialbeforea£350,000feewasagreedinFebruary1991.

Pavel, Pavel SrníčekMaking a reserve teamdebut soon after, the 22year old former soldierplayeda further13gamesincluding a 1-2 defeat atEverton the night beforehe’d make his first teamdebut.LeagueCupfinalistsand promotion chasingSheffield Wednesdayvisited St James Park asnewmanagerOssieArdilesturnedtoyouthtotryandspark life into an ailingUnited.

Following a steady ifunspectacular first match(1-0), Pav soon admittedhis debut had given himmixedfeelings:

“I’m sorry that John Burridge was the man who made way for me. John has given me a lot of advice and help since I arrived at Newcastle. He has been very kind and spent hours working with me as I’ve tried to adapt to the English game.”

Despitetheclamourofthesupporters to give Budgiea farewell once it wasconfirmed he’d depart inthe summer, Srnícek keptgoal for the remaining 6games but failed to addfurther clean sheets asUnitedfinished11th,some10 points off the play offplaces.

Speaking of Budgie’slooming departure Pavwould say: “I will be sorry to see him go but I suppose that is football. It’s a job and I have to try and make the most of this opportunity.”

DespiteArdiles intentionsof putting his faith inun-tried youngsters,United were one of thefavourites for promotiontothetopflightgoinginto1991-92. However thefirst 11 games returnedonly 1 win, 23 goalsconceded and 0 cleansheets asThe Mags wererockbottom.

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MARC CORBY

At this point our Number1wasexperiencingatorridtime and his credentialsbecame morem suspectas United conceded 3 at3rd Division Crewe and6 at Tranmere in the cupcompetitions.

A home game v Leicesterfollowedanddespitea2-0winanda firstcleansheetsincehisdebut,Pavelmadeway for Tommy Wrightfor the remainder of theseason. WithOssiesackedand replaced by KevinKeegan in February 1992,Pav only featured in onegameathometoTranmereasUnited,headingtowardsthe 3rd Division, lost 2-3.Wright returned for thenext game and safety wasguaranteedonthefinaldayoftheseason.

With Keegan confirmed asmanager, backed by theboard to revitalise Unitedand the supporters fullybehindhim,TheMag’sbeatallbeforetheminthefirst11gamesoftheseasontakingmaximum points. Keeganhadkept faithwithWrightonly giving Srnícek matchtime in the Anglo ItalianCupbeforetheIrishmangotinjured in a 3-2 midweekgameatBirminghamwheremidfielder Kevin Brockreplaced him in goal. Pavwould return for only his

2nd league game in 13month and kept a cleansheet in a 0-0 televiseddrawwithSwindon.

Winningthenext4gameswith 2 more clean sheetsachieved, the returningWrightwasstillexpectedtoreplaceSrnícekbutKeeganconfirmeditwas“Pav’sshirttolose”andtheCzechwouldkeepgoalfortherestoftheseason as United marchedimpressively towards thetitleandpromotion to thenewPremierLeague.

Despite the odd error,Srnícek kept another 10clean sheets in the leagueincluding 3 in a week attheendofFebruary.Ashisconfidence grew, alongsidea massive improvement incollecting crosses, we firstwitnessed the benefits oftraining under Keegan.Keen to show off hisfootballing skills, part ofhisrepertoirewouldbetodealwithabackpassbynonchalantly throwingtheattackeradummybefore shifting theball directly to ateam-matesfoot.Thesupporterslovedit.

Famously, followingthe 7-1 annihilation ofLeicester on the final dayof the season, Lee Clarkhanded Pav a t-shirt towear before the end of

season lap of honour. Inacknowledgement to thewords on the top, a newchantof‘PavelisaGeordie’bounced around St JamesParkandfromthispoint itwasclearPavhadendearedhimself to the supportersandearnedhimcultstatus.

Starting life in thePremierLeagueasKeegan’sNumber1choiceshowedhowmuchPavhadimprovedsincehisearly days. Howeverhe would seered in the2ndgameofthe seasonand failedto replaceWright in theleague uponhisreturn.H e

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In acknowledgement to the words on the top, a new chant of ‘Pavel is a Geordie’ bounced around St James Park

Get Pavel is a Geordie here

did feature in the LeagueCup where an unforcederror gifted Notts CountyashockleadbeforeUnitedwon4-1.

Keeganshockedsupportersby selling Wrightand signing Liverpoolreserve Mike Hooper for£550,000. Explainingthis some years later,the manager explainedhe was “swapping onegoalkeeping style foranotheraswehada lackof height at that time.”Hooper stood 1.5” tallerthan Srníček and despiteonly playing an averageof7gamesaseasonover8 years was the newNumberOne.

With United getting offto a slow start in 13thplace, Hooper’s signingcoincided with a massiveupturn in form as Unitedwon 11 of the next 17matches and Keegan’s

decision appeared astuteas 7 clean sheets wereachieved.

However,afailuretomovefor a Matt Le Tissier freekick in January appearedto turn supporters againstHooperandfollowingpoordisplays at Luton in theFACup andWimbledon inthe league he’d reachedan apparent point of noreturn. Keegan threatenedtoquitiftheterraceabusefrom a minority didn’tstopbut reinstatedPav forthe remaining 15 gamesregardless.Itwasapopularand ultimately correctdecisionasUnitedwon10,qualified for Europe in ahugelyimpressive3rdplaceand Pav played his partkeeping7cleansheets.

As the 1994-95 seasonkickedoff,therewasasenseofdéjàvuasPavwassentoffatLeicesterbutKeeganappearedtohavecomplete

faith in him by instantlyrestoringhimbackintotheteam.

Keeping a clean sheet onhis International debut inOctober,Srnícekwentontobecome themost selectedUnited player that season.His 52 League and Cupappearances returned 17cleansheetsbutTheMag’sfinishedadisappointing6th.

Startingthefollowinseasonsuspended following a 3rd(and final) United sendingoff in the penultimatehome game v Tottenham(3-3) the previous season,new signing Shaka Hislopreplaced Pav for the first17 leaguegamesofwhichUnitedwon12andsattopofThePremiership.

Shaka picked up a thighinjury away at Chelseaand in the days a keeperwasn’t always named as asubstitute,Pavcameonto

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It was a popular and ultimately correct decision as United won 10, qualified for Europe in a hugely impressive 3rd place and Pav played his part keeping 7 clean sheets.

face, and then pick a DanPetrescu free kick straightout of the net in a 0-1defeat.

However the next gamev Everton saw the Czech’sfinestmoment.1-0upbutdownto10meninthelast10 minutes, Pav pulled offa save thatGordon Bank’sputinhis“all-timetoptengreatsaves.”

The Independent’s matchreport stated: “TheNewcastle goalkeepercapped a sparkling displaywith a stunning save,changing direction in mid-divetokeepoutadeflectedAnders Limpar shot. ItsavedUnited2points.”

Rather criminally, the savewasleftoutoftheseason’s

videoreview‘SoClose’butthe spontaneous ovationfrom the supporters thatrepeated itself at full timewas well received andfondly remembered by allwhowere there aswell asthe‘AdoptedGeordie’:

“That feeling when thewholestadiumstandupandclapped and shouted myname. I don’t know if toomany players experiencethat”hetoldMartinHardyfor his ‘Touching Distance’book. “It’s somethingpeople will never have.Theywillwin trophiesandmoneyandeverythingtheydreamofbuttheywillneverhavethis.”

Winning6ofthefollowing7gameswhereafurther3cleansheetswereachieved,

United were still top andfavouritesforthetitlebutanawfulrunof4defeatsin6with12goalsconcededsawchampionship aspirationsfade.

Following a 3-4 defeat atLiverpool,PavanddefenderWarren Barton would bethe fall guys losing theirplacesfortheremainderofthe season where 4 winsin 7 wasn’t enough to pipManchester United to thetitle.

At this point Pav had 4caps prior to a call up tothe Euro 96 squad hostedinEngland.Failingtomakean appearance due to theformofPetrKouba,hesoonbecame The Czech’s firstchoice. Hewouldretain ifforthenext5yearsbefore

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...Pav pulled off a save that Gordon Bank’s put in his “all-time top ten great saves.”

bowing out on 49 capsfollowing a 0-1 defeat vBelgium that ended their2002WorldCuphopes.

PavwouldplayatWembleyforUnitedinthe0-4CharityShielddefeattoManUnitedbut losthisplacetoShakafortheopeningdaydefeatat Everton before claimingit back for the followinggame (a clean sheet athome to Wimbledonmore memorable for AlanShearer’s first United goal)andthefollowing17.

The uncertainty over whowasfirstchoicekeeperwaslaterexplainedbyKeegan:

“We were always tryingto find the next greatgoalkeeper and we nevertoldShakaorPavthattheywerenumberone.Itwasuptothemtoearnthatstatus,and theyweregivenequalopportunitiestodoso.”

At the time Pav shruggedoff rumours that Keeganhad bid £4 million forBlackburn’s Tim Flowerssaying: “Ever since I camehere Newcastle have been

connected with othergoalkeepers.”

Heearnedafurther3cleansheetsinthatrun,includingoneinamemorable5-0winover Man United, before aterriblerunofformreturnedonly1winin9gamesandadropto6thplace.Keeganwouldchangekeepersagainbefore quitting and Shakawould maintain his placeundernewmanagerKennyDalglish.

Despite a game free lastweekend in April, Unitedreceived no help fromthe FA who honouredSKY commitments overre-shuffling fixtures. ThismeantTheMag’s,aimingtobe the firstEnglishclub toqualify for the ChampionsLeague in2ndplace, facedthe tough prospect ofplayingtheir final4gamesin8days.

Srnícek was surprisinglyrecalled for the 1st gameatArsenalandkeptacleansheetina1-0win.

Goalless draws at WestHam and Champions

Man United followedbut United were stilloutsiders. Needingto better Arsenal’sresult and hopeLiverpool failed towin, Newcastleran riot againsta relegatedN o t t i n g h a mForest sidewinning 5-0.While theplayerswereonthehabitualendofseason‘lapofhonour’,newsofLiverpool’s drawand Arsenal’sinferior score-line confirmedUnited hadearned a placewithEurope’sElite.

Asthesummerdeveloped,itwasapparentDalglishwas willing to cash inon major assets to keepthe newly formed PLChappyandSrnícek,arguablyplayed to be put in theshop window, was transferlisted once Dalglish signedthehighlyratedShayGiven

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fromhisoldclubBlackburn.

Despite named sub on afew occasions, Srníček’slaststart forUnitedwouldbe a 1-1 home draw withBlackburninOctober1997.

Leaving soon aftersupporting United atWembley in the FA CupFinal defeat v Arsenal,Srníček eventually signedfor Sheffield Wednesdayand received an extremelywarmandgraciouswelcomeon his Owls debut, at StJames Park in November1998. Despite being partoftheopposition,hisritualofapplaudingbothcornersof the goal line for aslong as possible would beperformed.

Following Wednesday,Pav played for a host of

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otherclubs inEnglandandEurope before returning toNewcastle as goalkeepingcover in October 2006.Named as a sub on 10occasions due to injuries,PavcameonfortheinjuredGiven to a rapturousreception for the finalminutesofa3-1winoverTottenhamatGallowgate.

Starting on Boxing Day ina1-2defeatatBolton,Pavwasnamedsubfor15moregameswithoutdirtyinghisgloves. Departingagain in

What they said:Kevin Keegan:“A very good shot-stopper. Prone to the odd mistake but at Newcastle that weakness was exaggerated by the way we played – it didn’t make life a bed or roses for defenders and goalkeepers.”

Mick Quinn:“[He was] shy, only a kid and I seen him go from a shy kid to blossom into this lovely personality. He had this wicked sense of humour. If you’ve done well for Newcastle, they never forget you and they were singing ‘Pavel is a Geordie’”

Lee Clark:“He was liked by everybody, he was the one that everyone took too. You wouldn’t meet a more popular guy and he was a fine goalkeeper. We seen him come through and improve year after year to become one of the best in the Premier League.”

Journalist Martin Hardy:“[Pav was] someone who caught what their football club meant to the people of Newcastle, who matched the warmth and generosity of a region that grew to love him.”

Paul Joannou, The Ultimate Record.“An untested goalkeeper who eventually commanded popular backing”

For The Record:League Appearances: 149(2)

Goals Conceded: 157

Clean Sheets: 51

Other Appearances: 38(1)

Goals Conceded:50

Clean Sheets: 12

June 2007, rather fittinglyhis competitive career hadendedonTyneside.

Despite starting life atUnited inconsistentlywhere an error one weekwould be matched by aworldclasssavethenext,Pav, enhanced by a farsuperiorback4,improvedimmensely and hispopularity soured as hebecame an integral partof the 1993 promotionwinningcampaign.

He simply got what itmeant to play for suchan ardent and ferventcrowd and this small clipcelebrating Newcastle’swin over Sunderland inApril1993showsamutualappreciationthathasgrowneversince.

Atremendousathlete,agileand a brave shot stopper,us supporters embracedPav,adoptedhimasoneofourownandwatchedhimplayamassivepartinKevinKeegan’s revolutionisingof Newcastle United that,looking back, really werethebestoftimes.

Hiscultherostatus ispartoftheromanceinthisgamethatwillneverfadeaway.

ThankYouPav.R.I.Pbonnylad.

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The transfer window – the overhyped rhetoric making giddy men who have never kissed a girl, excited over a loan deal for their football club has passed again. This time Newcastle United were involved to the full. They strengthened and not with the usual influx of cut price foreign football-ers from inferior leagues. Not that buying from inferior leagues is always a negative, Gini is prime example of that. Yet this time we have been linked and actually purchased young, England international footballers, added pace and if I am honest a bit of an unknown in the shape of Henri Saivet.

Jonjo Shelvey arrived fromSwansea for a potentiallybargain £12m. Only timewilltellwhethertheSouthWelshclubwillregretsellinga top quality, if somewhatinconsistent talisman tooneoftheircurrentrivalsintheleaguetable.Hestartedlike an express train andhis first half performanceat home to West Hamhad a lot of fans purring.Yet he went off the boil atouch in the second halfand was fairly anonymousat Watford (mind, whowasn’t?). Ifwecanget theconsistencyfromhimasheages,maturesandcurbstheill-discipline that has seennumerous yellow cards

and flash points in recentseasonsthenwecouldhavesomeplayeronourhands.At23,he isyoungenoughtogrowoutofthat,whilstmaintaining the fire thatultimately fuels players ofhis nature. He has a goodrangeofpassing,canscorea goal, likes a tackle andas important as anythingfor me, can use both feetproperly!

Henri Saivet is a bit ofan unknown in terms ofwatchinghimplayregularly.Those who watch Frenchfootball regularly (really?)willtellyouhewasawingerthat Bordeaux convertedinto a defensive midfielder

and has been one of theirstronger performers thisseason. He started ourplaying for the Frenchnational team but hasdecided now to play forSenegal and that couldcauseustomisshimwhentheAfrican Nations comesaround. Yet positively headds more strength in aposition where the franklyaverage (and that’s beingkind) Colback, the finishedTiote and the overworkedAnita have been toilingsince the start of lastseason. Anita is a goodplayeranddivides support,butultimatelyhe’sprobablytoosmallphysicallyforthisleague.

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The signing that reallygripped everyone’sattention and showedNewcastle’s intention inthe window was that ofAndrosTownsend. I’d beentippedthewinkthathewascominginFebruaryandgoton at 14/1 so I was evenhappierwhenthedealwasfinally done. Daniel Levy’sinsistence that we pay£14m for a reserve playerwas met with dismay bymost but to be fair toNewcastleUnitedwestoodourgroundandpaid£12mforanEnglandinternationalwho could really add asparkandsomedesperatelyneeded pace to a mostlyvery static side. It will befascinating to see how helinks up with Shelvey andGini both intricately andwithhispaceinbehindthedefencesoftheopposition.We all know his tendencyto want to be on his leftfoot but I have seen hima couple of times recentlyfortheu-21s(Iknow,brassneckofmegoingonaboutwatching French football,butitwasonlytoseehim,honestly) and he wasn’t

as reliant and one-footedas when I have seen himagainstusinthePL.

Onthesubjectofpacewefinally made the strikingaddition we needed in theshape of Seydou DoumbiawhocomestothePLwitha dodgy record in Italianfootballbutasparklingonein theCL.The 29 year oldnettedagainstManUtdthisseason, from the reboundofapenaltyandhasagoodyardofpaceandhopefullywill bring his Europeanrecord here, and not hisItalian one. Ultimatelywe needed somethingalongside Mitrovic andGouffran and Riveire werenot the answer; unless thequestion was ‘what’s lessworthwhilethanhavingthetwo old women fromTheLesDawsonsketchshowupfront?’.

We attempted to make acoupleofother signings inand around the deadlineday including want awaystriker Saido Berahino. I’mnot sure how I feel abouttheir reluctance to sell,becauseontheonehandI

wouldlovetoseeusshowthat resolve but on theother, the lad isn’t playingand it makes little senseto keep someone, who ispalpablyunhappyataclubforthesakeofanironwill.Ultimately, he wasn’t forsaleandwemoveon.Therewere also moves for twoSpanish left backs whichwentwestandanattemptto reunite us with JoseEnrique, yet he decided tostayinLiverpoolandeathisownweightintapas.

Generally speaking mostNUFC fans would havebeenpleasedhadtheybeencanvassed after we failedto beatVilla on December19th about our transferdealings had they knownthe outcome would havebeenlikethis.Some,myselfincluded would be evenhappier if Sky’s ultimateprized prat (and let’s behonesthe’supagainstsomepretty stiff competition)JimWhitehad keeledoverin the forced excitement.Until May, let’s win somegames,havesomefunandenjoy supporting NUFCagaineh?

Generally speaking most NUFC fans would have been pleased had they been canvassed after we failed to beat Villa on December 19th about our transfer dealings had they known the outcome would have been like this

tf 98

Itstilldoesn’tfeelreal.Almosttwoweeksafterthenewsofhissadandunexpecteddeathfromcancer,theknowledgethatDavidBowieisnolongerwithusonPlanetEarthjustdoesn’tfeelright.AsIwaspreparingtogotoworkonMonday11January2016,Iflickedoverthenewschannelsandthereitwas.‘BreakingNews–DavidBowiehasdiedafteran18monthbattlewithcancer’.Thissimplycouldn’tbe.ThemediawasawashwithBowievideosandfeaturesforhisbirthdayontheFridaybeforeandtheimminentreleaseofhisalbum,‘Blackstar’.Hewas,inmymindandmostpeople’s,aliveandkicking,andreadytoreceivetheplauditsforwhatmanypeopleweredescribingashisbestalbuminyears.Hecouldn’tpossiblybedead.

Buthewas.DavidBowie–aperennial,permanentandmagical figure inmy life–haddied.

I can remember comingbackfromafamilyholidayinWalesandthenewsthatElvis Presley had died. Ican remember when JohnLennon was shot. I wasvery young when theseevents happened but Iunderstood that theseevents meant something.The relationships peopledevelop with music andsongs and artists and popstars and are complexand powerful. Whateverit does to the humanmind, you can’t ignore ordismissthefactthatitcanbe a profoundly deep andenriching experience. Yougrow up with these songsandthepeoplewhowriteandperformthem,anddevelopa strong emotional bondwith them, sometimesveering into idolatry or

fanaticism –and it feelsgood to have thesepeople – these idols,these stars, theseheroes,inourlives,even just for oneday. And withDavidBowie,itfeltmore than good tohavehiminourlives.Itfeltgreat.

Regularreadersofmycontributions to truefaith will know that Ilostmymothertocancerin2013.DavidBowiewasherfavouriteartist,andoneofmyearliestmemoriesofherwasher singing“Rebel,Rebel” tome. Oneofourfirstfamilyholidays,whenIwasasmallboy,wasona barge on the NorfolkBroads(Ibizacamelater)–andIcan’tlistento“LifeonMars?”withoutb e i n g

BOWIE - A LIFE

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transported back to thatholiday and to the earlyto mid 1970s in generalreally,it’ssoofit’stime.In1987, when David Bowieannounced thathewas tobringtheGlassSpider tourtoRokerParkofall places,my mam bought ticketsforthefamily,andtheoneand only time I was everallowed to bunk off fromschoolwastoseethemanhimself. So, when I heardthatnewsonthatMondaymorning that David Bowiehaddiedofcancer,aloadofotheremotionswerestirreduptoo.

So,growingup,BowiewasthereonTopofthePops,ontheradioandonourstereo–myyoungmindabsorbinghis utterly unique singingvoice and his wonderfulear formelody,with thosedistinct key changes thatwere one of his manysignatures. Writ largethroughout his glorious

career was his ability toreinventhimselfandcreatepersonas whilst still beingDavid Bowie. The Bowieof“SpaceOddity”morphedseamlessly into the Bowieof “Ziggy Stardust” – acreation of a perfect popidol that evoked Iggy Popand Lou Reed via TheMan that Sold the World.There’s absolutely nothinggood about the death ofDavid Bowie, but one ofthefewcrumbsofcomfortfor me is the knowledgethat there’s a whole bodyofwork that Ionlyhavealimited knowledge of. Yes,I’mfamiliarwiththesingles,but Hunky Dory, DiamondDogs, andAlladinSanearealloutthere,justwaitingtobelistenedto.

He decamped to the USafterreleasingthesealbumsand regenerated into the‘plastic soul’ of YoungAmericansreleasingoneofhisfinestsingles,theutterly

prescient “Fame”, wherehe worked with a youngLutherVandross. (Anothermajor influence on myearly youth from the 70salso regenerated and wasnotofthisearth.)

BBC’sbrilliantdocumentary‘FiveYears’showedjusthowmeticulous and focusedBowie was during thisperiod to create this newsound, to reinvent himselfand move away from theglamrocksoundoftheearly70s. He also discoveredthe excesses of the musicindustry,whichinthemid-70s,unsurprisinglyinvolvedhigh-grade cocaine, andhis appearance on theDickCavettshowsawhimsniffing, twitching, anddrawing imaginary shapeson the floorwithhiscane.ButAmericalovedhim,andhe was fast becoming aglobalsuperstar.

Then came his nextpersona –TheThinWhite

Writ large throughout his glorious career was his ability to reinvent himself and create personas whilst still being David Bowie.

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Duke, which, given his“astronomic”cocainehabit,wasquiteapt,andsawhimbridge the soul and funkof Young Americans intothe abstract electronicaof Heroes and Low, withStation to Station, analbum influenced by theicy Teutonic grooves ofNeu!, Can and Kraftwerk.Kraftwerk’s Trans EuropeExpress actually namechecked Bowie, whoreturned the complimentwithV2Schneider

These influences saw himmove to Berlin (BowiedescribedStationtoStationas“apleatocomebacktoEurope”), starting a trendamongst musicians tomove to the city to tapinto the magical creativityintheair,thewatersupply,or maybe just the drugsupply. Here, famously,hebegan working with BrianEno,andembarkedonwhatis now considered as hismost creative period - theresulting albums, Heroes,Low,andLodgerproducingsomeofhisfinestmoments.It’sworthpointingoutthat,in 1977, David Bowie was

a bona fide rock superstar,andamainstreamstarandmoved to Berlin to recordtwo albums that, despitecontaining two of his bestpop songs “Heroes” and“Sound and Vision”, were,toall extentandpurposes,exercisesinthemoreavant-garde spectrumofmodernmusic containing as theydid, a high percentageof gloomy, atmosphericinstrumentals.

In the mid-70s he alsostarred as the titularcharacter in The ManWho Fell to Earth, whichstarted a long associationwith the cinema. Two ofmy favourite films, MerryChristmasMrLawrence,andThe Hunger, starred DavidBowie in central roles, andhis appearance on screenwas always intriguingand interesting. HisperformanceinTheHungeris beautifully understatedandpoignantasavampirefacedwith theunexpectedrealisationthat,afterall,hewasn’t an immortal as hispartnerCatherineDeneuvewas.Lifeimitatedartinthelongrun.

HealsoworkedwithMartinScorsese, playing PontiusPilateinTheLastTemptationof Christ, and with DavidLynch on Twin Peaks: FireWalk with Me. This alladdedtotheperceptionofmy mind, that he was anomnipotent presence. Hefeaturedinsomanyofthethingsthatbroughtmejoyinlife.Andwhoelsecouldappear as a Goblin King,wearing those tights andthat mullet, dancing andsinging with puppets, andstillretainhiscredibility?

My next Bowie encounterwould have been agedeight seeing him dressedasaclownintheAshestoAshesvideo.Andthissongwillalwaystakemebackto1980.

The burgeoning NewRomanticsceneheldBowieup as a figure head withhis divergent approach tomusic,fashionandart,andhe featured many of the‘Blitz Kids’ in theAshes toAshes video including thelate Steve Strange. Hewasalsoadirect influenceon many of the bands I

The burgeoning New Romantic scene held Bowie up as a figure head with his divergent approach to music, fashion and art

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wenton to follow suchasJoy Division and DepecheMode.

The next milestone in mymemorywastheLet’sDancealbum. A highly polishedNile Rodgers-producedaffair and probably hiscommercial peak. Bowiefirmly embraced the MTVgeneration–andthealbumcontained anumberof hitsingles with memorablevideos,alongwiththethemefor Cat People, workingwith Giorgio Moroder –another demonstration ofhisaffinitywithcinema.

For me, “Loving the Alien”wasprobablythelastclassicBowie single, although1995’s “Hello Spaceboy”was a camp and highlyenjoyable Eurodisco rompwiththePetShopBoys.HethentouredhisGlassSpidershow,comingtoRokerParkonTuesday23June1987.Iwas there on that gloomysummer’sday,andI’vesincediscovered that Bowie’sopening greeting to thecrowd was “Good EveningNewcastle”. Now, Bowieis a fairly knowledgeable

blokewhoshouldknowthedifference having playedboth cities over the years.Either he was wrapped upin his rock star bubble, or,hewas taking thepissoutof the Mackems. Let’s gowith the latter shall we?Anyway, I was there, andI’msogladIsawhimintheflesh,performingonstage.

Thankfully, Bowie didn’tgo acid house or technotowardstheendofthe80sand into the 90s, creatinginstead his noisy rock TinMachineprojectandtouringhis greatest hits package,Sound andVision. He didhowever,flirtwithdrumandbass on 1997’s Earthlingalbum, and he embarkedonaUKtourthatsawhimvisitNewcastle’s legendaryRiverside. A formercolleague at NewcastleCity Council used to livenexttoTheRiverside’sAndyBalman, and she told meof themorning she lookedoutofthewindowandsawa rather dishevelled DavidBowiestumblingintoataxi.InWylam.

In the period immediately

after his death, the mediawas awash with personalstories about the man,and it made his deatheven sadder, as tale aftertale described how funny,how encouraging, howpersonable, and howbloodybrillianthewas.HisappearanceonExtrasisstillhilarious and brilliant. Hisfinal album, Blackstar, washisgoodbyegift,anditfeltinretrospectlikeafinalactofconceptualartinkeepingwith his entire career - adark meditation of a manfacing his own mortality.Whichwe’llallhave todoat some stage. That finalphoto of Bowie smiling,looking dapper with a haton, on a NewYork street,suggested a man that hadfound some kind of peacewithhissituation. Ifyou’dhad his kind of life andcareer, I’m sure you mightaswell.

So, he’s gone, and it’s nothyperboletosaythathewasone of the greatest artiststhe UK, and indeed theplanet, has ever produced.TravelwellStarman.

His final album, Blackstar, was his goodbye gift, and it felt in retrospect like a final act of conceptual art in keeping with his entire career - a dark meditation of a man facing his own mortality.

Having decided to cancelmyseasonticketandmakemyweekends‘thebesttheycan be pound for pound’,I saw the recent transferwindow as an opportunityto pause and reflect. Notjust the efforts to addresslong-standing failings withsomepre-crisisinvestment,but the increasingrealisation that Ashley isbecomingeasier topredict

and,whisperitquietly,issignificantly

weaker than he was ontaking over United in May2007.

No longer do nationalcommentators talkof Ashley as themisunderstoodormaverickprivatesectorsuccessstoryunloved by the parochial,state dependent northernmonkeys demanding heinvest squillions or theywillboycottthenewawaytop. No, huge momentumhas built around outingAshley’s business practicesas short-termist, flawed,unresponsive to a

changing environmentand stocked withunqualifiedpersonnel.

The parallels withUnitedarestark:

For Kinnear,L l a m b i a s ,Charnley andMoncur readthe whimsicalappointmentof futures on- in - l awM i c h a e lMurray tothe £250Mp r o p e r t yof arm ofSportsDirect,including adirectorshipof a certain

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StrawberryPlaceNewcastleLimited.One time studentparty organiser Murrayrepresents a furtherexample of Ashley’spenchant for putting faithin an under-qualified innercircle. Concerns amongshareholders about thecomposition of corporategovernance within SportsDirect - the discernablelackofexpertise,challenge,rigour,strategicacumen-ismirrored in our very own‘board’ - a kind of beigejunta of self-preservationwho are now seeminglylate converts to the ideathatscoutingBelgianyouthfixtureswillnotkeepyouinthePremierLeague.

Then we see Ashley’spledge to invest £10M toboost the wages of SportsDirectemployeesfollowingThe Guardian’s exposeof working practices atShirebrook HQ, followedby the line about makingSportsDirectthe“besthighstreetemployerbehindJohnLewis”.No laughingat theback but how many of usaresurethatthiswassomekind of moral awakeningormaybetheserarepublicutterances are linked to£400Mbeingwipedofftheshareprice,decliningprofitforecastsandevenariskofdropping out of the FTSE100.Rewindtothe“boltingthehorse” statement fromAshley before the finalfixture of last season andwe know that Ashley andhis acolytes will say or dojustenoughtoavertacrisis.Whena£5.136BnTVdealis sharedamongEPL clubsbetween2016-19(including

between £105M - £118M‘prize’moneyforCharnley’starget places of between10th and 16th) then therecent transfer windowshouldbeviewedasoneofexpediencyandnomoreachange of philosophy thanGeorge Osborne’s U-Turnontaxcredits.

We also see the wideningof cracks in the SportsDirect business model -over-stocking shops within-house brands, only 10%of transactions completedon-line (Ashley’s brother isICT lead at the company,bytheway)andcustomers’growing mistrust of theconstant ‘discount’ and‘sale’ signs - little wonderalmostallcityanalystsfeelthatSportsDirectiscedingground to JD Sports. Thepoint is surely that Ashleyis fallible and has a blindspotforthezeitgeist.Peoplewant low-cost goods, buttheyalsowantqualityandhigher-ticket brands. Likeourtransferpolicy,sourcingcheap and selling on getsyouonlysofar.

Ashley’s share meddlingwith Debenhams, Tescoand Findel has causedmuch angst among SportsDirect shareholders andhis tendencies to dabbleas a hostile investor arehemorrhaging into publicfarce at Rangers. Croniesbooted off the board andnow reprimanded by thecourts for “ridiculous”litigationagainstDaveKing,a man used to winning,domineering and being incontrolisslowlylearningtotucktail.

The sports pages may talkof Shelvey and Townsend,McClaren may speak ofa new era of investmentbut history and Ashley’sfootprints across currentaffairs suggests we shouldinterpret recent outlay tobe last-ditch, reactive -throwing the hedgehog atthedartboard,ifyouwill.

Ashley is an ideologuewhose broad hypothesis isthat NUFC could not goonlivingbeyonditsmeansfollowingtheLuque,Owen,Boumsong hedonism ofthe Shepherd years sohas reverted to the onlyoperationalmodelheknowswithoutanyunderstandingof how this translates torunning a Premier Leaguefootball club, delegatingresponsibility (but nevercontrol) to a loyal innercircle who will never rocktheboat.Itisclassicglobalsupply chain economics.Arrivals to SJP are sourcedthrough similar logic. Irecently read a defence ofGraham Carr’s methods,citing the expensive errorsofViduka,Smithandothersbut this misses the point.No-one want to returnto that, but they do want

to see the club bringthrough academy players,use the loan market, buyestablished top-flightperformers interspersedwith properly scoutedpotential from Europeanleagues. McClaren is rightwhenhetalksofthesquadneeding development over3-4windows(making follyof his earlier commentsabout judging him after10 games) but what doesthis say about NUFC in2016?Whatistheplan,thestrategy, the underpinningphilosophy? The juryis in - there simply isn’tone. Ashley can’t andwon’t change so Unitedcan’t and won’t change.Plan B? There is no PlanA-justexpediencyandanobsessionwiththebottomlinefromadistractedownersurroundedby thegratefuldim and that culture haspermeatedeveryaspectofthe football club. There isabsolutely no connectionoremotionalbondbetweenany of the key personneland people in the street.Thousands used to watchNUFC training sessions,now they send you anemail.Winsalwaysfeellikefalse dawns and defeats

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My relationship to the club has been reduced to little more than a transaction so the single most significant action I can take is to cancel my direct debit making August 2016 the first time since the 1950s that a member of my family will not be present at SJP for a home game.

which once used to ruina weekend barely register- like an aged boxer, thepunches have stoppedhurting.

Jumping back to TheGuardian investigation intoSports Direct, I recall theopening paragraph of thearticle without needing tocheck the text; “Cogs inthe machine would be acliche, but that really doesnot capture the disdain ofSports Direct towards itsworkers”.For‘workers’,youcouldtransplant‘supporters’and if we learn anythingfrom the revelations thatSports Direct staff aresearched before leavingShirebrook (among otherDickensian, penny-pinchingpractices) it is that Ashleylikes to sweat themargins.Myrelationshiptotheclubhas been reduced to littlemorethanatransactionsothe single most significantactionIcantakeistocancelmy direct debit makingAugust2016the first timesince the 1950s that amember of my family willnotbepresentatSJPforahomegame.

That’s me done - I amwalkingaway.

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