Evangelism from a Bowen Evangelism from a Bowen Theory perspective.Theory perspective.

OrOr

Murray Bowen meets JesusMurray Bowen meets Jesus

THESISTHESIS::

That if the Church is to take seriously That if the Church is to take seriously its task of Evangelism, then it needs to its task of Evangelism, then it needs to take into account not just the biblical, take into account not just the biblical, ethical and theological context, but ethical and theological context, but also the context of human relationships also the context of human relationships in which it takes place. This means in which it takes place. This means that Evangelism must be rooted not that Evangelism must be rooted not just in sound theology, but also in a just in sound theology, but also in a credible understanding of human credible understanding of human functioning.functioning.

Given these assumptions, Given these assumptions, What is Evangelism? What is Evangelism?

Given then this particular definition of Given then this particular definition of Evangelism, what then is needed in the Evangelism, what then is needed in the

training process to implement it?training process to implement it?

THEOLOGICAL ASSUMPTIONSTHEOLOGICAL ASSUMPTIONS Theology needs to be relational rather Theology needs to be relational rather

than propositionalthan propositional– The power of relationshipsThe power of relationships

God God The GospelThe Gospel Church Church

– As Institution and as As Institution and as – The Kingdom of GodThe Kingdom of God

The MissionThe Mission

ASSUMPTIONS FROM BOWEN ASSUMPTIONS FROM BOWEN THEORYTHEORY

THE EIGHT CONCEPTS OF BOWEN THE EIGHT CONCEPTS OF BOWEN THEORYTHEORY

Differentiation of selfDifferentiation of self Nuclear Family Emotional ProcessNuclear Family Emotional Process Family Projection ProcessFamily Projection Process TrianglesTriangles Multigenerational Transmission ProcessMultigenerational Transmission Process Emotional Cut-OffEmotional Cut-Off Sibling PositionSibling Position Societal Emotional ProcessSocietal Emotional Process

TOGETHERNESS - INDIVIDUALITYTOGETHERNESS - INDIVIDUALITY Individuality is a biologically rooted life force Individuality is a biologically rooted life force

(more basic than being just a function of the brain) (more basic than being just a function of the brain) that propels an organism to follow its own that propels an organism to follow its own directives, to be an independent and distinct entity.directives, to be an independent and distinct entity.

Togetherness is a biologically rooted life force Togetherness is a biologically rooted life force (more basic than being just a function of the brain) (more basic than being just a function of the brain) that propels an organism to follow the directives that propels an organism to follow the directives of others, to be a dependent, connected, and of others, to be a dependent, connected, and indistinct entity.indistinct entity. Kerr p64Kerr p64

The togetherness forces are derived from The togetherness forces are derived from the universal need for “love,” approval, the universal need for “love,” approval, emotional closeness, and agreement. emotional closeness, and agreement. Bowen p.277Bowen p.277

The individuality force is derived from the The individuality force is derived from the drive to be a productive, autonomous drive to be a productive, autonomous individual, as defined by self rather than individual, as defined by self rather than the dictates of the group. the dictates of the group. Bowen p.277Bowen p.277

There is never a threat of too much There is never a threat of too much individuality.individuality. Bowen p.279Bowen p.279

QUESTIONS FOR EVANGELISMQUESTIONS FOR EVANGELISM Can Evangelism at times be a process that Can Evangelism at times be a process that

pushes for togetherness at the expense of pushes for togetherness at the expense of individuality? individuality?

Do evangelism programmes imply a Do evangelism programmes imply a

togetherness of thinking and acting with little togetherness of thinking and acting with little tolerance for self definition or individuality? tolerance for self definition or individuality?

What is the goal of evangelism?What is the goal of evangelism?

How does Jesus function in relationships? How does Jesus function in relationships? Does the relationship with Jesus enhance Does the relationship with Jesus enhance

individuality? Togetherness? Or both?individuality? Togetherness? Or both?

Does salvation enhance or restrict Does salvation enhance or restrict individuality? individuality?

Two Key Variables:Two Key Variables:

AnxietyAnxiety

Differentiation of SelfDifferentiation of Self

ANXIETYANXIETY

Since the response to the perception of a Since the response to the perception of a threat is anxiety, the more easily people threat is anxiety, the more easily people are threatened, the more anxiety they are threatened, the more anxiety they experience. Since anxiety undermines experience. Since anxiety undermines a feeling of emotional well-being, a feeling of emotional well-being, people automatically act in ways people automatically act in ways designed to reduce anxiety. designed to reduce anxiety. Kerr p74Kerr p74

The greater the emotional The greater the emotional interdependence of a relationship, interdependence of a relationship, therefore, the more easily people are therefore, the more easily people are threatened, the more anxiety they threatened, the more anxiety they experience, and the more energy is experience, and the more energy is invested in actions aimed at reducing invested in actions aimed at reducing that anxiety. The more actions people that anxiety. The more actions people feel compelled to take to reduce anxiety feel compelled to take to reduce anxiety and to avoid triggering anxiety, the less and to avoid triggering anxiety, the less the flexibility of a relationship.the flexibility of a relationship. Kerr p74Kerr p74

Anxiety is an organism’s Anxiety is an organism’s response to a threat real or response to a threat real or

imagined.imagined.

ANXIETY DEFINED

QuestionsQuestions How does the Church’s anxiety about itself How does the Church’s anxiety about itself

affect its outreach?affect its outreach?

How does anxiety affect the Church’s How does anxiety affect the Church’s perception of those outside of the church?perception of those outside of the church?

Can evangelism be subverted into a Can evangelism be subverted into a programme to manage the anxiety of the programme to manage the anxiety of the church?church?

DIFFERENTIATIONDIFFERENTIATION

What isWhat isDifferentiation of Self?Differentiation of Self?

This difference between people in the This difference between people in the proportion of life energy prone to be proportion of life energy prone to be invested and bound in relationship is invested and bound in relationship is described by the concept of described by the concept of differentiation of self. differentiation of self.

The “I position” defines principle and action The “I position” defines principle and action in terms of , “This is what I think, or in terms of , “This is what I think, or believe” and, “This is what I will do or will believe” and, “This is what I will do or will not do,” without impinging one’s own not do,” without impinging one’s own values or beliefs on others. It is the values or beliefs on others. It is the “responsible I” which assumes “responsible I” which assumes responsibility for one’s own happiness and responsibility for one’s own happiness and comfort, and it avoids thinking that tends to comfort, and it avoids thinking that tends to blame and hold others responsible for one’ blame and hold others responsible for one’ own unhappiness or failures. own unhappiness or failures. Bowen p495Bowen p495

The “responsible I” avoids the “irresponsible The “responsible I” avoids the “irresponsible I” which makes demands on others with, “I I” which makes demands on others with, “I want, or I deserve, or this is my right, or my want, or I deserve, or this is my right, or my privilege.” A reasonably differentiated privilege.” A reasonably differentiated person capable of genuine concern for person capable of genuine concern for others without expecting something in others without expecting something in return, but the togetherness forces treat return, but the togetherness forces treat differentiation as selfish and hostile. differentiation as selfish and hostile. Bowen p495Bowen p495

Differentiation has two dimensions:Differentiation has two dimensions:– Focus on selfFocus on self– And is undertaken in relationships, And is undertaken in relationships,

especially with those who are especially with those who are emotionally significant to one.emotionally significant to one.

The togetherness needs of a very poorly The togetherness needs of a very poorly differentiated person, which are overriding differentiated person, which are overriding in their influence, are felt as deep yearnings in their influence, are felt as deep yearnings to be loved, accepted and guided through to be loved, accepted and guided through life. As differentiation increases, life. As differentiation increases, individuality is better developed, individuality is better developed, togetherness needs are less intense, and togetherness needs are less intense, and emotional reactiveness is better modulated.emotional reactiveness is better modulated.

Autonomy does not mean selfishly Autonomy does not mean selfishly following one’s own directives it following one’s own directives it mean the ability to be self-mean the ability to be self-determined. Self-determination determined. Self-determination could result in the choice to be could result in the choice to be guided by the best interests of the guided by the best interests of the group. group. KerrKerr

Differentiation is:Differentiation is:

Being self-focused but not selfish.Being self-focused but not selfish.

Being other focused without the Being other focused without the loss of self. loss of self. KerrKerr

QUESTIONSQUESTIONS How will you know if Evangelism is a How will you know if Evangelism is a

process of self differentiation i.e. a process process of self differentiation i.e. a process that arises out of a more thoughtful and that arises out of a more thoughtful and calmer place in self or when it is an emotional calmer place in self or when it is an emotional process that reflects the anxiety of the process that reflects the anxiety of the Church? Church?

What is the relationship between autonomy What is the relationship between autonomy and salvation? and salvation?

Can evangelism be an invitation to fuse i.e. Can evangelism be an invitation to fuse i.e. give up self to the church? give up self to the church?

What would evangelism look like when it is What would evangelism look like when it is an expression of the church’s differentiation?an expression of the church’s differentiation?

How can we know if the witness of the How can we know if the witness of the Christian is an expression of the solid Christian is an expression of the solid self?self?

Can evangelism be understood as the Can evangelism be understood as the Christian’s “I” statement?Christian’s “I” statement?

TriangulationTriangulation

The basic building block of any emotional The basic building block of any emotional system is the “triangle.” When emotional system is the “triangle.” When emotional tension in a two-person system exceeds a tension in a two-person system exceeds a certain level, it “triangles” a third person, certain level, it “triangles” a third person, permitting the tension to shift about within permitting the tension to shift about within the triangle. … The emotional system is the triangle. … The emotional system is composed of a series of interlocking composed of a series of interlocking triangles. triangles. Bowen p.174Bowen p.174

The theory considers the triangle – a three-The theory considers the triangle – a three-person system – as the molecule of any person system – as the molecule of any emotional system, whether it exists in a emotional system, whether it exists in a family or in a social system. … The family or in a social system. … The triangle is the smallest stable relationship triangle is the smallest stable relationship system. A two-person system is an system. A two-person system is an unstable system that immediately forms a unstable system that immediately forms a series of interlocking triangles. The series of interlocking triangles. The triangle has definite relationship patterns triangle has definite relationship patterns that predictable repeat in periods of stress that predictable repeat in periods of stress and calm. and calm. Bowen p198-199Bowen p198-199

QUESTIONQUESTION

Can evangelism programmes be a Can evangelism programmes be a triangling process in which Christians triangling process in which Christians project and bind their anxiety about their project and bind their anxiety about their own future onto non-Christians?own future onto non-Christians?

What can the church expect from What can the church expect from evangelism programmes when the driving evangelism programmes when the driving force for its action is anxiety?force for its action is anxiety?

Emotional Cut-offEmotional Cut-off

We have come to use the term emotional We have come to use the term emotional cut-off or simply cut-off to refer to cut-off or simply cut-off to refer to emotional distancing, whether the cut-off emotional distancing, whether the cut-off is achieved by internal mechanisms or is achieved by internal mechanisms or physical distance.physical distance. Bowen p535 Bowen p535

The one who runs away does have a The one who runs away does have a different life course. He needs emotional different life course. He needs emotional closeness but is allergic to it. He runs away closeness but is allergic to it. He runs away kidding himself that he is achieving kidding himself that he is achieving “independence.” The more intense the cut-“independence.” The more intense the cut-off with his parents the more he is off with his parents the more he is vulnerable to repeating the same pattern in vulnerable to repeating the same pattern in future relationships. future relationships. Bowen p.535Bowen p.535

The person who runs away from his family The person who runs away from his family or origin is as emotionally dependent as the or origin is as emotionally dependent as the one who never leaves home. They both one who never leaves home. They both need emotional closeness but are allergic to need emotional closeness but are allergic to it. it. Bowen p382Bowen p382

Is emotional cut-off from families a Is emotional cut-off from families a characteristic of people living on the West characteristic of people living on the West coast of the USA?coast of the USA?

If those who cut-off from their families are If those who cut-off from their families are allergic to too much togetherness, how can allergic to too much togetherness, how can Christians witness to them without triggering Christians witness to them without triggering their reactivity and distancing?their reactivity and distancing?

If they are distancing from their families how If they are distancing from their families how can the Church minister to them without can the Church minister to them without pursuing them?pursuing them?

QUESTIONS

GIVEN THESE THEOLOGICAL GIVEN THESE THEOLOGICAL ANDAND

BOWEN THEORY ASSUMPTIONS,BOWEN THEORY ASSUMPTIONS,

WHAT THEN IS EVANGELISM?WHAT THEN IS EVANGELISM?

EVANGELISM IS THE PROCESS OF EVANGELISM IS THE PROCESS OF DEFINING ONESELF AS A DEFINING ONESELF AS A CHRISTIAN TO THE WORLD CHRISTIAN TO THE WORLD AROUND ONE.AROUND ONE.

Evangelism defined:Evangelism defined:

A Systems View of the Evangelism A Systems View of the Evangelism ProcessProcess

Evangelism is relational. It concerns God’s Evangelism is relational. It concerns God’s relationship with humankind and nature relationship with humankind and nature and our relationship with God, others and and our relationship with God, others and nature. Evangelism therefore needs to be nature. Evangelism therefore needs to be rooted in a relational theology that provides rooted in a relational theology that provides a broad relational understanding of life.a broad relational understanding of life.

Evangelism focuses on the relational Evangelism focuses on the relational processes of God’s activity and uses a processes of God’s activity and uses a number of scriptural images such as:number of scriptural images such as:

Love, justification, healing, liberation, Love, justification, healing, liberation, separation, peace, celebration, teaching, separation, peace, celebration, teaching, listening, breaking of bonds, conversion, listening, breaking of bonds, conversion, caring, restoration, salvaging etccaring, restoration, salvaging etc,,

Evangelism is the witness to the presence of Evangelism is the witness to the presence of God in the world, others, nature and self.God in the world, others, nature and self.

Evangelism is grounded in the Gospel of Evangelism is grounded in the Gospel of Jesus the Christ.Jesus the Christ.

Evangelism is the work of the Holy Spirit.Evangelism is the work of the Holy Spirit.

Evangelism is about the Kingdom of God.Evangelism is about the Kingdom of God.

Evangelism is a process of defining a self. Evangelism is a process of defining a self. It focuses on self rather than on the other. It focuses on self rather than on the other.

It is the “I” statement of Christians. This It is the “I” statement of Christians. This is not a selfish focus on self, but the taking is not a selfish focus on self, but the taking of personal responsibility for self in of personal responsibility for self in relationships.relationships.

Evangelism is about Christian self-Evangelism is about Christian self-definition, and not about defining or definition, and not about defining or attempting to change others. Changing attempting to change others. Changing others is the work of the Holy Spirit. others is the work of the Holy Spirit.

Evangelism relates to the “thoughtful” aspects Evangelism relates to the “thoughtful” aspects of life rather than to the emotional.of life rather than to the emotional.

Evangelism as a thoughtful process of self-Evangelism as a thoughtful process of self-definition, and is an essential and integral definition, and is an essential and integral aspect of the Christian life. As such it is an aspect of the Christian life. As such it is an expression of the “solid self” of the Christian.expression of the “solid self” of the Christian.

Evangelism is a thoughtful response of the Evangelism is a thoughtful response of the Christian to the call in 1 Peter 3:15Christian to the call in 1 Peter 3:15

Always be prepared to make a defense to Always be prepared to make a defense to any one who calls you to account for the any one who calls you to account for the hope that is in you, yet do it with gentleness hope that is in you, yet do it with gentleness and reverence.and reverence.

Evangelism is always undertaken in the Evangelism is always undertaken in the context of anxiety both in the “evangelist” context of anxiety both in the “evangelist” and in the one to whom he or she relates. and in the one to whom he or she relates. This means that evangelism requires a high This means that evangelism requires a high degree of self-management by the Christian.degree of self-management by the Christian.

Evangelism affirms that God is involved in Evangelism affirms that God is involved in the lives of all people – both believers and the lives of all people – both believers and unbelievers. unbelievers.

Evangelism is not judgmental.Evangelism is not judgmental.

Evangelism is a process and not an event Evangelism is a process and not an event or a programme that one takes, studies or or a programme that one takes, studies or implements.implements.

Evangelism honours the differences Evangelism honours the differences between people and does not seek between people and does not seek togetherness as sameness of thinking, togetherness as sameness of thinking, feeling or behaviour.feeling or behaviour.

Evangelism finds it source of strength in the Evangelism finds it source of strength in the Holy Spirit.Holy Spirit.

Evangelism is not to be equated with “church Evangelism is not to be equated with “church growth.” Evangelism may or may not lead to growth.” Evangelism may or may not lead to an increase in church membership.an increase in church membership.

Assumptions Underlying A Systems Assumptions Underlying A Systems Perspective of the Evangelism ProcessPerspective of the Evangelism Process

That Christians are often not familiar, or That Christians are often not familiar, or comfortable with telling their own, or their comfortable with telling their own, or their family’s faith story. family’s faith story.

That awareness of their own faith story as well That awareness of their own faith story as well as that of their family, is normative for as that of their family, is normative for evangelism since this is the only authentic evangelism since this is the only authentic story for each Christian.story for each Christian.

QuestionQuestion

What process needs to be provided in What process needs to be provided in order to assist Christians to define order to assist Christians to define themselves?themselves?

Goals of the Evangelism ProcessGoals of the Evangelism Process

To provide Christians with the opportunity To provide Christians with the opportunity to reflect on the presence of God in their to reflect on the presence of God in their own and their family’s life.own and their family’s life.

To provide an opportunity for Christians to To provide an opportunity for Christians to tell their own and their family’s faith story tell their own and their family’s faith story so that they can give “an account of the so that they can give “an account of the hope that is within them.”hope that is within them.”

To assist Christians in a process towards To assist Christians in a process towards greater self-definition.greater self-definition.

To provide Christians with the theological To provide Christians with the theological and theoretical resources that inform this and theoretical resources that inform this process.process.

To offer opportunities for biblical To offer opportunities for biblical reflection.reflection.

Nel Family Tree

EvaluationsEvaluations

The evaluations bore out the The evaluations bore out the appropriateness of this process.appropriateness of this process.

The following comments were The following comments were made about the shift in Thinking made about the shift in Thinking

as a result of the processas a result of the process : :

Telling my own story strengthened my Telling my own story strengthened my faithfaith

A sense of gratitude for my familyA sense of gratitude for my family

Less anxious about evangelism and Less anxious about evangelism and where I belongwhere I belong

I no longer focus on othersI no longer focus on others

I tell my own storyI tell my own story

““Evangelize Yourself”Evangelize Yourself”

Comments about Self:Comments about Self:

Sense of joy in own uniqueness and Sense of joy in own uniqueness and what that brings to the Christian what that brings to the Christian communitycommunity

Deeper and broader sense of God’s Deeper and broader sense of God’s presencepresence

Can be my own person and be a Can be my own person and be a ChristianChristian

More responsible for selfMore responsible for self

Always felt God’s presence but now see Always felt God’s presence but now see how God was presenthow God was present

More tolerant of other people at work even More tolerant of other people at work even those who don’t believe since I know that those who don’t believe since I know that God is at work. Can’t wait for an God is at work. Can’t wait for an appropriate time to tell my story.appropriate time to tell my story.

Comments about God:Comments about God: By going back to the family tree I By going back to the family tree I

realized that God was working there realized that God was working there already. God is so much bigger and more already. God is so much bigger and more loving.loving.

The visualization of the family in the The visualization of the family in the family diagram aided in seeing God family diagram aided in seeing God through he generations. Seeing was through he generations. Seeing was important.important.

The sense of evangelism as managing The sense of evangelism as managing ourselves rather than others, ourselves rather than others, understanding our own stories so that we understanding our own stories so that we can share them with others.can share them with others.

The restoration of relationships with God, The restoration of relationships with God, self and others. Managing oneself etcself and others. Managing oneself etc

Other Comments:

The idea of seeing the family tree as a The idea of seeing the family tree as a process of God working in the familyprocess of God working in the family

The following quotation is attributed to Albert Einstein The following quotation is attributed to Albert Einstein and is taken out of his context, theoretical physics:and is taken out of his context, theoretical physics:

"The significant problems we face cannot be "The significant problems we face cannot be solved at the same level of thinking we were at solved at the same level of thinking we were at when we created them. Like the military that is when we created them. Like the military that is always prepared to fight the last war, most of us always prepared to fight the last war, most of us gear our lives to handle in the future the problems gear our lives to handle in the future the problems we have encountered in the past. Like the military we have encountered in the past. Like the military the problems of the present tend to be linked to the problems of the present tend to be linked to those past solutions and catch us unprepared. We those past solutions and catch us unprepared. We then tend to employ measures we have used in the then tend to employ measures we have used in the past and, in unstable and stressful conditions, those past and, in unstable and stressful conditions, those measures have a likelihood of making the current measures have a likelihood of making the current problems worse.”problems worse.” Papero "Stress, Society, and the Individual"Papero "Stress, Society, and the Individual"

““Return to your home, and Return to your home, and declare how much God has done declare how much God has done

for you.” for you.” Luke 8:39Luke 8:39

Share with those around you

“How much God has done for you”

this past week.

THE BEGINNING OF THE ENDTHE BEGINNING OF THE END“Go in peace and witness to the hope “Go in peace and witness to the hope

that is within you.”that is within you.”