There but for the Grace WIP

7/28/2019 There but for the Grace WIP

1/18

"There But For The Grace..."

Author:Indie

Email: [email protected]

Notes: For my very beloved twin, tango's birthday. I don't normally post unfinished works in process, but I'mmaking an exception because there is no way I could get this story done in time for tango's birthday. Please notethat this version is not beta'd, so I'm sure it had mistakes. Also, the final version of this story may varysignificantly from this section. Many thanks to Gia for all her help and feedback on this fic.

The shrill buzzing pounded against her ears and Buffy groaned, burrowing deeper under her covers, smashing herpillow against her ears in an effort to silence the grating noise. She hated mornings. Of course, this wasntmorning. Morning was when the sun was coming up, birds were chirping, all that happy sunshiney crap. Thiswas the middle of the night. It wasn't natural to be up hours before the sun. And Buffy did not want to get outof bed.

But when had what she wanted ever mattered? With a growl of displeasure, she kicked back the covers andtossed off the pillow, glowering at all of her barracks mates. Her scowl went completely unnoticed as the twodozen other SITs in her class went about their morning rituals, pushing themselves out of their bunks, makingbeds, pulling on uniforms. Unhappily, Buffy fell in with the others, participating in the same morning ritual shedknown for the last three years.

*

Buffy hit the ground with jarring force, her head smacking against the mat hard enough that she saw stars.

Get up, came the emotionless command.

Gritting her teeth against the pain, Buffy pushed herself to her feet. She turned, facing her commanding officer,eyes glued to the ground lest she glare at him and be written up for insubordination. She waited for theinescapable upbraiding. She didnt have to wait long.

Does anybody want to offer an opinion on what Ms. Summers did wrong? Angel asked the class.

Buffy tried not to cringe. It was bad enough when he yelled at her in front of all the other SITs, but when heinvited the lazy brats to criticize her while she was the one working her ass off it was almost more than shecould take.

Shes dropping her shoulder, Rona offered snidely. You can see her coming from a mile away. Shestelegraphing.

Thats a given, Angel said dryly. Does anyone want to let me know what new form of incompetence Ms.Summers has added to her repertoire this morning? Angel crossed his arms over his chest, his vision pinningeach of the two dozen SITs in place. Few of them would meet his gaze and those who did quickly looked away.

No one knows? he asked, in a cruel, mocking tone. He snorted in disgust. Faith? he called.

Dressed all in black like Angel, Faith came to stand behind her superior. Summers is favoring her left leg, Faithsaid plainly.

Buffy glanced up at Faith. A former, albeit hobbled, Slayer, Faith was good, but nowhere near as good as Angel,

who was a Monk. Buffy was shocked that Faith had picked up on the slight hindrance in her movements.

Yes, Angel said with a tight smile, letting the other SITs know that they had seriously disappointed him by notpicking up on something he found so obvious. Ms. Summers is favoring her left leg. He glowered at the youngwomen. If youre going to spend your time goofing off, watching me kick Summers ass rather than doing yourown drills, you should at least pay attention. He clasped his hands behind his back. Faith, please take them ona short run. I think out to the pier and back should be sufficient.

The lack of groans was due only to the fact that the SITs knew that if they did, hed double the length of the run.As it was, ten miles was nothing to scoff at. As the others filed out of the room, Buffy went to follow.
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2/18

Not you, Summers, Angel snapped, clearly irritated.

Buffy stopped short, looking at the Monk. He rolled his eyes and dropped into a mocking bow, gesturing towardsthe small trainers room just off the gymnasium. With a huff, she turned, limping. There was no need now to tryand hide her discomfort.

Buffy flicked on the trainers room lights, looking around the small cramped space. It smelled like muscle rub

and athletic tape, which she found oddly comforting. It was far more palatable to her senses than the largeinfirmary in the middle of the Council complex. Buffy would do anything to avoid having to go there. Pushingherself onto the padded table, Buffy waited.

Methodically, Angel shrugged out of the short, black nylon jacket, leaving him in a form fitting black t-shirt, a pairof black fatigue pants and regulation issue combat boots. He removed his ubiquitous wrap around sunglasses,blinking rapidly in the harsh, fluorescent light. What did you do? he asked.

I twisted my knee, she said dully.

Angel looked at her suspiciously before sitting down on the rolling stool and situating himself in front of herseated form. On the exam bunk, she was significantly higher off the ground than he. He braced one hand on herthigh, just above her kneecap and the other clasped her ankle. Slowly, he rotated her leg, testing the range ofmotion.

Buffy hissed in pain and he stopped immediately.

How did you twist your knee? he asked.

She looked away, shifting uncomfortably on the bunk.

Summers?

I was practicing, she said, not meeting his gaze.

Practicing what?

She huffed in irritation. The spinning kick you showed us yesterday, she admitted.

He was quiet for a long time and she knew that wasnt a good sign. The same spinning kick that I explicitly toldyou and the rest of the SITs to not try unless either Faith or I was present.

Thatd be the one, she replied cheekily.

I could write you up for this, you know, he said darkly.

Buffy looked down at him, trying to force her expression to be cold. Angel most certainly could write her up forsuch a blatant violation. Of course, another write-up would mean be three strikes and Buffys out. Out on thestreets. With no place to go. She was over eighteen now and the Council was no longer legally obligated toprovide her with basic food and shelter.

Unlike the majority of the SITs, Buffy didnt come from a Council family. Unlike Kennedy or Eve or Molly, Buffycouldnt just drop out of Slayer Training and be welcomed home with open arms. She didnt have a home to goto. Her father left when she was just a kid, her mother died several years previous. It was the Slayer life ornothing for Buffy. She wasnt a SIT to pad her rsum or make things look pretty for some future time when shecould make a bid for election to the Councils governing board. She was a grunt, a lifer. A career as a Slayerwas the only thing that stood between her and a life on the streets.

Of course, having been her CO for the last three years, Angel knew all of this. He was her guardian, just as hewas guardian to all the other, albeit few, orphaned SITs. He knew exactly what it was he was holding overBuffys head.

Id prefer that you didnt, Buffy said quietly.


3/18

Angel frowned at her, his expression shuttered and unreadable as always. He never gave any insight into hisinternal monologue. You have a problem with authority, Summers, he said firmly.

Thats not true, she countered defiantly. Authority has a problem with me.

Oh yes, he condescended, how could I forget? Youre never wrong.

I didnt say that, she snapped defensively. I just ... Oh, she hated this. She wasnt being self-pitying. Hedidnt know what it was like to have to deal with all these pampered princesses day in and day out, daughters ofpowerful Council members, or other government officials. They didnt have a clue what it was like to work, toreally work. They couldnt care less about being Slayers, yet day after day, they were praised while she wasreminded she would never be good enough.

You just ... Angel prompted.

Youre always on my case, she yelled. Youre always pointing me out in front of everyone, telling everyone allthe things Im doing wrong. Im sick of it. I just wanted to practice so I wouldnt do it wrong again.

So the fact that you ignored a direct order and ended up hurting yourself is really my fault? he asked.

Yes.

Cry me a river, he said dryly. Your knee is sprained. Stay off it for the next week. If I see you on it again, Iswear Ill break the opposite ankle. Do I make myself clear?

Buffy met his gaze defiantly, holding it for a long moment. Crystal, she bit out.

*

Giles was startled to find the library lights on when he returned from his lunch break. Surely hed turned themoff. Hello? he called from the doorway. Is someone here?

Its just me.

Giles smiled upon hearing the familiar voice and made his way up to the bookcases. He found Buffy sitting on

the floor, leaning back against the wall, surrounded by books and notepads. He noticed the very prominentbrace on her knee. Were you injured?

She frowned. Sort of, she admitted. And as punishment for not being able to get my ass kicked in public, Imforced to write a fifty page essay on Slayer lore and the importance of Council training.

Giles frowned, removing his glasses to polish them. Buffy was a notoriously bad student and he didnt doubt thatbeing forced to write an essay was a far steeper punishment than having to run laps for an entire afternoon.

Punished by whom exactly? Giles asked.

Buffy snorted. Who else? Angel.

Giles nodded. While Buffy might be able to fudge her way through an essay for one of the other Trainers, Angelwould no doubt expect nothing short of her absolute best. Well, I have a few books that might be ofassistance, he offered.

Buffy stared up at Giles. Youre taking his side, she groused.

Shrugging, Giles said, Im not taking his side, Im merely offering assistance.

You could at least vilify him, Buffy pouted. You know, make me feel better. While I spend the rest of mynatural life writing this stupid essay.

Making you feel better will not get this essay written, Giles informed her curtly.


4/18

All you Watchers are the same, she huffed. Always taking each others sides.

Frowning, Giles pointed out, Angel is not a Watcher. Hes a Monk and I dont think hes quite the villain youmake him out to be.

Shows how much you know, she muttered.

He watched as she pushed herself off the floor, satisfied she could maneuver herself to the table without breakinganything. Turning, he headed for his private stash of books in his office. They would contain more than enoughinformation to allow Buffy to write her essay, regardless of how much she would bitch through the process.

Giles smiled tightly. Buffy had a chip on her shoulder, but underneath the rough, brash exterior was a trulyremarkable young woman. Her mind was astoundingly nimble, though she often pretended to be no morecerebral than your average jock.

He met Buffy her first year as a SIT, three years earlier. At sixteen, Buffy had been even more prickly than shewas now. Her mothers death was still recent and the culture shock from being forced into close quarters with somany young women from privileged families only exacerbated her already pronounced social problems. She hadinitially shunned all of his attempts to help her, being rude and hostile. But for some reason, Giles had pressedon. And little by little, Buffy had finally warmed to him. When she let her guard down, she could be adelightfully charming young woman. But he knew there were very few people who had ever seen that side ofher.

Buffy chose to view the world as a conflict. You were either on Buffys side, or you were against her. Therewasnt much room for shades of gray. Sadly, beyond himself, Giles had no idea whom Buffy might consider to beon her side. He knew the number had to be pitifully few. And Angel was most certainly not counted amongthem. If anything, Buffy viewed him as the bane of her existence with the conviction and singularity of purposeknown only to the very young. And in some respects, Buffy Summers, hardened Slayer in Training, was so very,very young.

*

Buffy stared down at the paper. More appropriately, she stared down at the giant red D on it. And then tooknote of the fact that the D had been hastily scribbled out and replaced with a B. Buffy had no troublefollowing the action. Angel had given her a D on the essay and Ms. Calendar, the English teacher, had upped itto a B. Angel might reign supreme in the combat tactics part of the SITs curriculum, but he wasnt omnipotent.He could assign an essay, but Ms. Calendar, being the English teacher, was the one ultimately responsible for thegrade.

Asshole, Buffy muttered under her breath as she shoved the paper in her backpack and headed for the lockerroom. Twenty minutes later she was in the standard issue white t-shirt and gray sweats.

She weaved her way through the other girls, heading out to the large gymnasium. As she entered, she narrowlymissed running into Angel.

"Watch it," he snapped.

Buffy glowered at him and then smirked darkly. "Thanks for the grade," she said with faux bubbly charm. "MyGPA could definitely use the boost."

His brow furrowed and he repeated, "Boost?"

Oh, this was lovely. He didn't even know he'd been overruled. She smiled broadly. "The B on my essay," shesaid, her voice dripping with saccharine sweetness. "Apparently Miss Calendar's expertview of my abilities is alittle more objective than yours."

Angel watched her for several long moments, his expression betraying nothing. Buffy was eventually sounnerved she had to look away.

Lifting two fingers to his lips, Angel whistled sharply, the sound echoing loudly in the large space. "Circle!" hebellowed.


5/18

Buffy watched as he walked over to an elevated area of the gym that was used for one on one sparring. As partof their training, the SITs sparred every Friday afternoon in front of the group. But this wasn't Friday. It wasTuesday. A shiver of fear tickled up Buffy's spine. Why hadn't she just kept her mouth shut?

The circular platform was about fifteen feet across, elevated only a foot and half off the floor. He stood on it,looking at the assembled SITs ringing the edge. "Summers," he said with a dark smile. "Join me."

It was an order. Non-negotiable. Swallowing thickly, Buffy took the step up onto the mat, cursing the fact thather brace had been removed the previous day and she was fully mobile.

"Today we have a special lesson," Angel informed the class, "on the power of the ego."

He looked Buffy up and down, taking in her appearance and nearly snarling in contempt. She forced herself tostand up straight and meet his gaze.

"Last week Ms. Summers disobeyed a direct order," Angel informed the class. "As punishment, I assigned her awriting project." He smiled sadistically at Buffy and then looked around the ring of SITs shrugging. "I think weall know that such cerebral pursuits aren't exactly her strong suit."

There were snickers from the other SITs and Buffy felt her face flame crimson. How could he be doing this? Thesadistic bastard! He really got off on making her look like a complete fool in front of everyone.

"Now I read the paper," Angel continued. He smiled, rolling his eyes. The snickers turned into all out laughter."Let's just say that her breeding obviously shows."

Buffy flinched like she'd been smacked in the face. How could he be doing this? How could someone that shewas supposed to trust implicitly embarrass her so publicly? A single tear streamed down her face, but she forcedherself to hold her ground.

"You can't make a sow's ear into a silk purse," he snarled, looking at her with utter contempt.

Buffy saw red. Yes, she was from a nothing, dirt-poor family with no Council connections at all. And yes, sheknew that Angel was one of the Council darlings, a member of an extremely old and powerful Council family. Hehad all of the connections, all of the breeding and wealth that would forever elude her. And here he was mockingher publicly in front of her peers, inviting them to laugh at her.

With a howl of rage, she threw herself at Angel. He barely had time to prepare, twisting away at the last possiblemoment to prevent his head being knocked from his shoulders from the force of her blow. He grabbed her, usingthe her own momentum to send her sprawling. But it was a stall tactic at best. He was still trying to regain hisown footing when she twisted around and advanced on him again.

She held nothing back as she rained down blows on him and Angel had to use everything he had just to keep herfrom killing him. One of her punches hit him square in the face, breaking his nose. He covered his head and sheused the opportunity, punching him viciously in the side until she heard at least two of his ribs crack.

Angel managed to get away, but she followed him like some mindless beast hell-bent on blood. She pulled backto deliver another vicious, possibly lethal, punch and his superior training finally prevailed. He shifted, droppingdown into a crouch in front of her. He punched upward with power and speed, catching her under the chin withthe heel of his palm.

The force of the blow knocked her backwards off her feet, leaving her thoroughly dazed. For several long

moments, she couldnt hear, couldnt feel anything other than the sharp pain radiating through her skull. Sherolled over, blindly trying to push herself back to her feet and he pinned her, planting a knee in the small of herback as one of his hands grabbed the nape of her neck. He was breathing harshly and Buffy could feel the bloodfrom his broken nose dripping sickeningly against her back.

Buffy slumped against the mat, all of her fight gone. It was too much to take. Three years of constant criticismfinally won him the war of attrition. Who was she kidding? She could never fit in here. Better to just leave, togo back to the world she came from, a world where no one expected her to be anything more than the trash sheknew she was.


6/18

"Ego," Angel barked at the SITs, glowering at all of them, his face covered with blood. "Ego makes every lastone of you think that you're better than Buffy Summers. And you're all wrong. Buffy is smarter, stronger, fasterthan every one of you spoiled little rich bitches. She knows it. I know it. You all know it. And yet, you deludeyourselves, pretending that you're better. You're not."

He pushed himself to his feet, releasing Buffy. She didn't move.

"Ego made Buffy strong. If she had managed to get a hold of me a few minutes ago, I would be dead. But egoleads to bad decisions, mistakes. Buffy is an infinitely talented natural fighter. I'm no match for her. But if I canget under her skin, make her angry, set her off her game, I can take the upper hand. As you just saw,sometimes there's a risk involved with that. Provoke the wrong person to violence and you might not live to tellthe tale. So be careful, with your own ego and with others."

He looked over his shoulder at Faith. "Take them out for a run."

"Where?"

"I don't care where," he said with disgust. "But I don't want to see them again before sundown. And if any ofthem even think about slacking, let them know they'll do nothing but run for the rest of their time with me."

Buffy listened to the footfalls growing more distant. Looking up, she saw Angel's hand. With more than a littletrepidation, she allowed him to help her to her feet. She was still woozy and she swayed, clasping his arm for

balance.

He led her back to the trainers room, helping her up on the table. Pulling a cold pack out of one of the drawers,he snapped the plastic, causing the chemicals to mix. When it was sufficiently cold, he wrapped it in a towel andhanded it to her. Buffy pressed the cold pack under her chin, watching mutely as he walked over to the large,tub-like sink and washed the blood from his face.

He returned to where she sat, wiping his face with a towel. Taking a seat on the rolling stool, he tossed the towelinto the laundry basket. His nose had stopped bleeding and the swelling was already starting to abate. Heleaned over, fishing around in one of the cabinets for a penlight. Finding it, he checked the battery. It wasdead. Angel didnt seem to be particularly surprised by this. Buffy watched as he methodically changed out thebattery and then clicked on the little light. Satisfied it was working, Angel rose to his feet, standing directly infront of Buffy.

His movements were slow and deliberate and done in perfect silence. He placed his hand on either side of her

head, gently feeling along her jaw with the tips of his fingers. She made a small sound of discomfort and almostabsently he shushed her, his voice warm and comforting. She relaxed a little more, but winced in pain when hepushed against her chin with his thumbs. Satisfied that he hadnt accidentally broken her jaw, his hands movedto her neck. He ran his thumbs firmly along the lines of her muscles, looking for any irregularity. Finding none,he then gently grasped her jaw in one hand while holding her neck with the other and slowly swiveled her head,testing her range of motion.

Buffy could hear his unnecessary breath. There was this sickly crackling noise with every rise and fall of hischest. No doubt shed accidentally punctured a lung when she cracked his ribs. For the first time, she felt badabout that. But her head was still very fuzzy and her thoughts couldnt really seem to wrap themselves intoanything coherent enough for true regret. She looked at him dopily, really noticing him for the first time. Yes, ofcourse, shed looked at him before. She looked at him for hours every day. But shed never really taken theopportunity to lookat him. He was beautiful. She giggled at the thought. His sharp look caused her to soberquickly. But he was beautiful. In a completely masculine way, of course. His dark hair, those huge brown eyes.Shed always wondered how brown eyes could be so cold. But his always were, cold verging on icy. Shewondered for a moment what those eyes would look like warmed with passion. Yeah, he was a Monk, but he was

also a man or male at least. He was also too pale, but that came with the territory, him being a vampire andall. And that mouth ...

Follow the light with your eyes, he directed. Buffy jumped slightly, blushing as she turned her attention to thelittle penlight he held. She tried to follow it with her eyes as he moved it in a large circle. When that wasfinished, he shined the light in both of her eyes, causing her to wince in pain.

You have a concussion, he said flatly. You need to go to the infirmary.

No, Buffy said, her demeanor becoming instantly serious.


7/18

Its not negotiable, he informed her.

Im not going, she said more firmly.

Summers.

Buffy looked up at him, her bottom lip quivering as she tried not to cry. She hated hospitals. She hated them

more than almost anything. The mere thought of them was enough to make her break out in hives.

He sighed tightly and pulled his cell phone out of his pocket. He stepped into the hall for a few moments. Hewas speaking so quietly, Buffy couldnt eavesdrop on his conversation. Upon returning, he leaned forward,scooping her up into his arms. Buffy made a small squeak of protest, her arms automatically going around hisneck. Your ribs, she said.

My ribs are fine, he told her, walking out of the training room and heading for the tunnels that led to theinfirmary.

Buffys terror was very real, but she simply didnt have the energy to fight him. She felt bruised and battered,emotionally as well as physically. And she couldnt even remember the last time shed been touched by anotherbeing outside of the sparring ring. There was nothing sexual about being held in Angels arms, but it wascomforting. He felt sure and solid and his grip on her was tight. She melted against him, resting her foreheadagainst his shoulder.

*

Buffy was shocked to find Giles waiting at the infirmary when they arrived. An attendant directed Angel to one ofthe exam rooms where he gently set Buffy down on the bed. He gave Giles a curt nod and then promptlydisappeared.

Giles was very good natured about the whole affair, taking Buffys irritable mood in stride. He simply sat in achair next to the hospital bed and chattered along about rather inane topics. Buffys temper would have beenmuch more waspish if she hadnt been so relieved for his presence.

She was a horrible patient, scowling at the doctors and nurses that came in to evaluate her. They all agreedthere was nothing major wrong with her, but they wanted to keep her several hours for observation. Buffysighed, laying back on the bed.

You cant go to sleep, Giles informed her curtly.

She frowned at him. Fine, she countered, then entertain me.

He smiled indulgently, knowing that she was being such a handful only because she was terrified. What wouldyou like me to entertain you with? he asked.

She looked at him speculatively, biting down on her bottom lip. Whats the deal with Monks? she asked.

The deal, he repeated, frowning. Hed been shocked earlier to see Angel holding Buffy, especially knowingBuffys loathing for the Monk. But he also noticed that something had most certainly changed between them.Perhaps Buffy was becoming more familiar with shades of gray. I assume you mean their origins.

He took a deep breath, searching his memory for what he knew about Angel and his brethren. Traditionally,being a Monk was punishment for particularly heinous vampires. When possible, the Council would capture themand using a potent mix of magic, would restore their souls and forcibly bind them to the Councils will.

A punishment? Buffy asked, her brow furrowed.

Giles nodded. With one exception, every Monk Ive ever heard of has been created in such a way, forced toserve the very people they conspired against as soulless demons.

What was the exception?


8/18

A small smile played on Giles lips. Angel, he said, but Im assuming you already knew that.

Why was he the exception?

I know you believe me to be older than dirt, Giles said wryly, but I assure you all this information is verysecond hand. Angel was part of the Council more than a century before I was even born. He took a deepbreath, removing his glasses to polish them. Hes quite secretive, Giles noted. So I cant be certain how much

of this is true and how much is mere conjecture that has arisen over the years.

Youre stalling, she said plaintively.

Giles smiled, replacing his glasses. Angel is part of a very powerful Council family, that much you alreadyknow. Unlike the rest of the Monks, he isnt indentured to the Councils will. He stays for his own reasons and asa member of a Council family, he retains his rank and status. He has full Council privileged, though to myknowledge, he has never exercised them.

So why does he stay?

Shrugging, Giles said, I doubt anyone other than Angel could answer that question.

You know something, Buffy pressed.

Giles looked at her soberly. Rumor has it that he was a young man in love. The girl of his fancy was Called as aSlayer. This was far before our time, when being called as a Slayer inevitably led to death on the battlefield. Itwasnt like now where daughters of influential Council members can do some cursory tour of duty and returnhome to their lives and families and careers decorated soldiers. Being Chosen was an inevitable deathsentence. He took a deep breath. The only way that Angel could be near her was to take a Monks vow, forfeithis humanity, his mortality.

Buffy pushed herself up on one elbow. He gave up his life to be with her?

He gave up his life to be nearher, Giles answered. For a very short period of time. Only as long as she was intraining. As an active Monk, Angel is bound by a vow of celibacy and service to the Council.

So he gave up his life just to be near her and train her and then watch her die?

So the story goes, Giles said softly. But, like I said, only Angel knows the truth and as far as I understand, heisnt telling anyone.

*

It took him several minutes to answer her knock, which wasnt odd given the extremely late hour. Or early hourdepending on how you looked at it. She groaned, thinking how shed have to be up in a few hours. Damn thehospital for keeping her for so long.

As he pulled open the door, Buffy swallowed harshly. He stood there wearing nothing but his black fatigue pants,the top button undone. Oh lord. Shed known he had a good body, shed sparred with him countless times.Shed been pressed against him only hours earlier. But to be faced with said body, looking all hard and chiseledand ... She forced her attention back to his face. He was looking at her expectantly. Can I, uh, come in? shestammered.

He shrugged, stepping away from the door. Buffy followed him into the apartment. The Monks quarters werealmost as austere as the SITs barracks. It was a studio apartment with bare concrete walls and floor. It couldhave been a very cold, lonely room, but she was shocked to see how hed added personal touches to make itmuch more homey. There were beautiful works of art on the walls. Several small lamps offered a warm, diffuselight. The furniture was old, made of dark woods and rich fabrics.

She watched as he flopped down into an armchair and then gestured her toward the sofa. She sat down on theedge, growing more and more nervous by the second. She looked at his long form stretched out in the chair.She couldnt help but notice his bare feet on the bare concrete. Apparently being a vampire had other perks.She would have been freezing in that position.


9/18

Oblivious to her perusal, Angel threw back the rest of the contents of his glass, grimacing as the alcohol burnedits way down his throat.

I thought Monks werent supposed to drink.

Angel looked at her with hooded eyes. Monks arent supposed to fuck, he said shortly. Drinking is merelyfrowned upon.

Buffy swallowed thickly, dropping her gaze to the ground. Angel wasnt just drinking, he was drunk. Stinkingdrunk.

Angel shook his head, crossing his arms over his chest. What are you doing here, Buffy? he asked. Did yousneak out of the infirmary?

Her head snapped up at his usage of her first name. To her knowledge, he had never referred to her as anythingbut Summers. No, she answered firmly, I didnt sneak out. They released me. Good as new.

Angel didnt look convinced, but he didnt seem inclined to argue. That doesnt answer why youre here, hesaid dryly.

She looked down at her hands nervously. I just ... she trailed off, then cleared her throat. I just wanted to

talk to you about some of the things you said today.

He met her gaze and as usual, his was absolutely unreadable. Looking away, he sighed. You pissed me off, headmitted grudgingly. Dont get me wrong, I had a point, but I shouldnt have tried to get it across the way Idid.

Yeah, well, what was your point? she asked.

He looked at her again and leaned forward in his chair, bracing his elbows against his knees. That chip on yourshoulder is threatening to crush you under its weight.

She frowned looking away.

He stood up, pacing around the room until he could look her in the eye. You came here, he said. You wantedto know. Im telling you.

Almost imperceptibly, she nodded.

Youre good, Buffy, he admitted with more than a little awe in his voice. Youre without a doubt the bestSlayer Ive ever trained, but there is so much anger in you, so much rage. If you dont get a handle on that andfind some way to channel it, trust me someone else will find a way to use it against you just like I did today. Andthat would truly be a shame.

Why would it be a shame? she asked quietly.

Angel looked at her for a long moment before turning away. He ran his hands over his face, sighing heavily. Heturned his back to her, staring at an ornate mirror on the wall that reflected everything but himself. You knowwhat happens to Slayers, Buffy?

What? she asked in a mere whisper.

They die, he said flatly. Turning around, he faced her again. I stay here year after year, century aftercentury. I train the SITs, prepare them as best I can. At the end of three years, I pat them on the head andsend them out to fight the Councils wars ... And they all die.

She swallowed harshly. So why bother?

For the chance to make a difference to just one of them, he answered seriously. He walked over to where shesat stiffly and crouched down in front of her, balancing on the balls of his feet. He reached out, his hand


10/18

hovering just short of caressing her cheek, but he didnt allow himself to make contact. You have a chance,Buffy, he said softly. A chance to beat the odds, to be the one Slayer that doesnt fall in battle, the one Slayerthat lives to die of old age, who isnt hobbled like Faith or whose mind isnt broken like Dru. You have thestrongest heart Ive ever seen.

He pulled his hand back, balling it in a fist as he screwed his eyes closed. He shook his head sharply andabruptly stood. But if you cant get past whatever it is thats eating you, all of that heart, all of that potentialand power and training isnt going to get you anything but dead.

He turned around, pacing the room without looking at her. Do you know what the other Monks call me? heasked.

Buffy hadnt really thought about the Monks interacting much at all. There werent many of them, a handful hereand there. Buffy had met one named Spike, who, like most of the others, worked out in the field, fighting side byside with the active Slayers. No, she answered.

The Keeper of the Dead, he said flatly. They call me that because when one of the career Slayers dies, Im theone who has to claim her body, to bring her back here and see that she gets a proper burial. I get the lost souls,the ones with no family to want them, even in death.

Slayers like me, she whispered.

He turned, fixing her with his intent gaze. Ill get you, he said thickly. One of these days Ill get a call andtheyll hand me your body neatly wrapped up in a black plastic bag. Tears welled in his eyes and she could seethe muscles flexing in his jaw. And that might just kill me.

Angel, she said softly.

He looked away, shaking his head. Go back to the barracks, Buffy, he said wearily.

Angel, please

Now, he snapped. Leave.

Mutely, she rose to her feet and headed for the door, unable to stop the tears running down her own cheeks.

*

Faith eyed Angel up and down. He looked like Hell. No, actually shed seen Hell before, Angel looked worse.She could smell the sour scent of alcohol seeping out of his pores. Rough night?

Mind your own damn business, he snapped.

Faith raised her eyebrows, but kept her mouth shut. Angel could be a total pain in the ass, but he was usually atleast civil to her. Shed known he was twitchy about Summers for years, but apparently yesterday had shakenhim up even more than she anticipated.

Faith led the SITs through their drills while Angel lurked in the shadows, nursing his hangover. She dismissedthe SITs for lunch and walked over to where he was leaning against the wall. Travers wanted me to remind youthat the convo paperwork is due today.

Fuck, Angel snapped in disgust. Why cant they just let that sad, antiquated ritual die?

Shrugging, Faith said, Yeah, well, considering the ritual used to be that theyd lock a defenseless Slayer in with avamp while they fought to the death, Im not really sure that convocation is actually all that evil.

He looked at her with disgust. Or with what she imagined to be disgust. Hiding behind those damn sunglasses,sometimes she couldnt tell.


11/18

Youre telling me that you, the ardent feminist, isnt bothered by this? he demanded. You didnt feeldemeaned when they did it to you?

She sighed. Not really. I mean, its not much of a shock is it? Arranged marriages are still common place. Thegirls chosen at convo have probably known for years that theyre going to be married off to those old geezers.

Angel snorted in disgust. He hated the convocation ceremony. He got to spend three years training a class of

Slayers only to then parade them in front of the aging, power-hungry Council members like a bunch of damnbrood mares. They were soldiers for fucks sake, but before they were sent to the front, the Council memberswere given the opportunity to pluck them out of the herd and take them home as trophy wives. The entire ritualwas absurd. But of course, Faith was right. Most of the girls knew from the time they were children if they weregoing to be married off. Unions between powerful Council families were nothing new and certainly not done on awhim. There were negotiations, dowries, an entire host of demands to be met before such a union could takeplace. Even the most power hungry of Council members werent going to agree to marry off their little girlswithout having an agreement written in stone.

Yeah, Angel said dryly, pushing off from the wall. I better get on that.

*

Travers looked up as Angel tossed the list of graduating SITs down on his desk. Settling his glasses on the endof his nose, he studied it. Very well, he said. Thatll be all.

Thats not all, Angel countered.

Travers leveled his gaze at the Monk. You have something to say?

Angel crossed his arms defiantly over his chest. I want to dispense with all the damn pomp and circumstance,Angel said dryly. You already know which girls are going to be bartered at the convocation. I dont want tosend all of them. Theres no point in the other twenty girls having to sit through that damn ritual.

Frowning, Travers said, I think you forget your place.

No, Angel replied in a near growl, you forget your place. I may be a Monk, but Im not without connections.

Sighing, Travers leaned back in his chair. Angel wasnt bluffing. He was a Monk, which would usually mean he

was at the Councils mercy, but as always, he was a special circumstance. His family connections were deep andpowerful. A nephew several generations removed, Wesley Wyndham-Pryce, was currently the head of theCouncil and Travers knew he often looked to Angel for advice. Fine, Travers said. Only the five need attend.

Four.

Five, Travers countered darkly.

Vi, Amanda, Eve and Kathy, Angel said darkly, enumerating the SITs whom he already knew to be betrothed.

Yes, Travers drawled. He picked up the list Angel handed him earlier, studying it. And ... Buffy Summers.

Angel stopped cold. Pardon?

Buffy Summers, Travers repeated. Oh, I know its late notice, but its not like she has any family to negotiatewith.

Who put in a bid for her? Angel asked through clenched teeth.

Travers chuckled. I forget how protective you are over your little lost sheep, he said condescendingly. EthanRayne did and the Council sees no reason to deny his bid.

Without a word, Angel turned and left the office.


12/18

*

Rupert! Angel bellowed, storming into the library.

Giles looked up as did the several younger SITs milling about the library. Giles smiled tightly at the youngwomen. Please excuse us, he said. Ill be more than happy to assist you later.

The girls quickly filed out, shooting scared, furtive glances at Angel. When they were gone, Giles pointed Angelinto his office. Tea? he asked, holding up the little ceramic pot.

Angel merely snarled in reply.

Shrugging, Giles poured himself a cup, unperturbed. Angel wouldnt actually do him any harm, regardless of howagitated her was at the moment. Taking a seat at his desk, Giles watched Angel pace around the room like acaged tiger. Care to tell me whats wrong? he asked blandly.

Angel stopped and swiveled around to face Giles. Do you know anything about Buffy being bartered at thisyears convocation?

Giles coughed on his tea, setting his cup down abruptly. Excuse me?

Angel smiled tightly. My response exactly. He dragged a hand through his hair, sending his already spiky locksinto further disarray. I just talked to Travers and according to the little troll, Ethan Rayne has put in a bid forBuffys hand. The Council apparently sees no reason to oppose the union.

Ethan Rayne, Giles bellowed rising to his feet. I was in school with him. Hes old enough to be her father!

Angel snorted, walking over to the small sofa. He seemed to collapse onto it, rubbing his eyes wearily. Helaughed mirthlessly. Maybe this is for the best, he said in a defeated tone.

The best? Giles asked tautly. Marrying Buffy off like some piece of chattel to a man twice her age ... Howcould that be for the best?

Marrying her to Rayne would keep her from having to live her life as a Slayer, he said seriously. It wouldmean she wouldnt be forced out onto the front lines, to live life like some trained beast, to eventually die for theCouncil. Shed be safe. As Raynes wife, shed have money, status, all the things shes never had.

She would be miserable and you know it, Giles said harshly. Ethan Rayne is a sadist and a lecher. Hed breakher spirit in ways infinitely worse than battle would break her body.

Angel groaned, not wanting to believe the situation was as dire as it appeared.

You have to do something, Giles informed him shortly.

Angel looked at Giles. Do something? he parroted incredulously. What do you want me to do Giles? What doyou think I can do?

Youre her guardian, dammit, Giles snapped. You can oppose this union even if the Council wont.

Angel snorted in disgust. Oppose it to what ends? So she can be free to die on some stinking battlefield in awar that has nothing to do with her? How is that any better than this?

Well, think of something! Giles demanded. I will not see her married off to Ethan Rayne.

Then why dont you marry her? Angel countered seriously.

Giles sputtered, looking at him incredulously. You cant be serious.

Yes I can, Angel said stubbornly. Youre a Council member. You can marry her.


13/18

I am a lesser Council member, Giles said dryly. Im not on par with Ethan Rayne. He far outranks me.

Yes, but if I oppose the marriage as her guardian and suggest you instead, the Council will have to listen.

This is absurd, Giles snapped. I think of Buffy as a daughter, I most certainly am not going to take her intomy bed.

I didnt say you had to sleep with her! Angel roared. He glared at Giles, breathing hard.

Giles looked at Angel, his gaze narrowing. You seem to be quite sensitive on the subject of me having sexualrelations with Buffy, he said quietly.

Angel snorted. I am not sensitive on the subject, he denied. Im merely pointing out that if you truly think ofher as your daughter, that there is the option of marrying her and notconsummating the relationship.

Giles crossed his arms over his chest, watching Angel intently. What about you? he asked.

Im a Monk, Angel said, rolling his eyes.

Youre a Monk because you choose to be one, Giles pointed out, not because you have to be. Youre a Councilmember of far higher rank than Ethan Rayne. If you chose to court Buffy, you wouldnt even need to formally

oppose Ethans troth.

Buffy could still choose Rayne, Angel pointed out.

But she wouldnt, Giles countered.

Why wouldnt she? Angel demanded. She hates me.

Giles watched Angel for several long moments. She doesnt hate you, he said quietly. She is confused byyour apparent cruelty to her, but she doesnt hate you.

Im not cruel, Angel snapped.

Your behavior towards her has been absolutely deplorable at times, Giles stated flatly.

Angel shrugged, staring blindly at the wall. I just ... I just wanted her to be strong, to be the best, he saidquietly.

Giles looked at the ensouled vampire staring morosely at nothing. He and Buffy were a matched set, both sowounded and skittish that they couldnt see the forest for the trees. Perhaps together they could help each otherheal. Of course, that depended on them being together in the first place. He sighed heavily. You have twooptions, Giles said. You can oppose the marriage as Buffys guardian and allow her to continue as a Slayer forthe Council, or you can offer your own troth and let Buffy choose.

*

There were a series of whooping cheers. Buffy looked up from the book she was reading for Ms. Calendars classto see the postman enter the barracks. Mail was always such a big deal, but never receiving any, Buffy never got

too excited. But as she looked up, she noticed two more postmen. Why on earth would they be getting enoughmail to warrant three postmen?

She watched as the standard mail was delivered, of course, none to her. But then other two postmens armybags were empties, revealing a series of large, ornately wrapped boxes. Most of the other girls giggled andlaughed as Vi, Amanda, Eve and Kathy were handed brightly wrapped presents. However, as the last postmanwalked over to her bunk and set two packages on Buffys bed, the room fell silent. Buffy looked aroundnervously.

Buffy startled as Kennedy threw herself down on Buffys bed laughing. Damn, girl, she said, beaming. Twotroths. That never happens these days.


14/18

She looked at Kennedy and then glared at the other SITs until they finally turned away, crowding around the fourother girls. What are these? Buffy whispered.

Troths, Kennedy said, as if that were sufficient explanation.

Whats?

Kennedy rolled her eyes. I keep forgetting youre not from a Council family, she said. Theyre ... presents,she said brightly.

Presents, Buffy repeated. Someone sent me presents?

Two someones actually, Kennedy continued. She shrugged. Theyre ... marriage proposals.

Buffy had been reaching out to touch one of the packages and abruptly drew her hand back. Marriageproposals? she demanded, scandalized.

Kennedy nodded. Dont look at me, she said. I dont know whats going on. The other girls have alwaysknown these were coming. Marriages are arranged for years. But you ... youve apparently got a littlecompetition going on.

Buffy blinked, trying vainly to wrap her mind around the concept. She was a Slayer, a soldier. What the hell wasgoing on? I dont get it, she said wearily.

Sighing, Kennedy took pity on her. Its an old tradition, she said. If you accept one of these troths, youll getmarried and you wont be a Slayer anymore. Or at least, you wont have to go fight. Usually its just aformality. Like I said, Vi, Kathy, the other girls, theyve known for years that this was coming. The weddings arearranged between families.

But I dont have a family.

Kennedy shrugged. Then I guess the Council or someone does it on your behalf.

So I have to pick one? Buffy asked, her nose crunching up in disgust. I cant just say no?

I dont know, Kennedy admitted. Like I said, most of the time these things are arranged between families. Idont know if you can say no.

Buffy frowned, crossing her arms over her chest as she stared at the packages warily.

At least open them, Kennedy goaded. You dont even know who theyre from.

When Buffy didnt move, Kennedy finally grabbed the first package, a brightly wrapped and ribboned affair. Shepulled the lid off and looked through the contents, pulling them out and depositing them in Buffys lap. It was anodd, feminine assortment, a bottle of perfume, a gold bracelet, a dried rose and a little stuffed unicorn. Buffystared at the toy, frowning. Does he think Im five?

Kennedy laughed but kept digging. She stopped abruptly. Taking out a card, she looked at it with disgust.Ethan Rayne, she said, scowling.

Not prince charming, I take it.

Lecherous old goat is more like it, she spat. Hes icky. You dont want him. Lets look at the other one.

Buffy placed the items back in the box and snatched the second present off Kennedys lap before she could openit. Do you mind? she asked.

Holding her hands up in surrender, Kennedy motioned for Buffy to continue. Buffy looked at the package. It waswrapped in a simple, shiny black wrapping paper with no decoration or adornment. Her brow furrowed as she


15/18

opened the lid and looked inside. It was lined with a rich, red velvet. She pulled out a small, black box andopened it, finding a simple, silver cross. Digging more, she found a beautiful but deadly knife. She hefted it forweight. It fit her hand perfectly. More and more curious, she continued looking and found a small ring boxcontaining a simple silver band ornamented with a heart, a cross and a pair of hands.

Its a Claddagh. Buffy snapped her attention to Kennedy. Its a wedding band, Kennedy continued.

Mutely, Buffy pulled out the final item, a small book of sonnets by Elizabeth Barrett Browning. There was a smallcard tucked inside and Buffy opened the book. The card was tucked in on the page with the poem How Do ILove Thee? Let Me Count the Ways. She pulled out the card and opened it. In a perfect scrawling script werethe words:

I hope you will do me the honor of considering my proposal.-A

Buffys mouth went dry. Shed known, somehow, from the moment she opened the present who it was from, butuntil she saw the card in his own distinctive script, she hadnt allowed herself to truly consider the possibility.

Lemme see.

Buffy snatched the card back out of Kennedys reach, clasping it to her chest.

Oh-kay, Kennedy said. Jumpy much?

I, uh, have to sort some things out first, Buffy said, pushing herself off the bed.

*

Angel opened the door, stoic as always. You should be in bed, Buffy, he said. You have early call tomorrow.

I got your present, she said boldly.

Angel watched her for several long moments before stepping aside so she could enter. As soon as she did, heclosed the door. Its referred to as a troth, he said. Its a formal proposal of marriage.

She nodded, unable to meet his gaze. Yeah, I got that much, she said.

Please, have a seat, he offered.

She once again perched on the edge of his sofa, her hands clasped tightly in her lap. So, uh, She stammered.I guess Im mostly wondering ... why.

Angel looked at her seriously, seeming to contemplate something. He took a deep breath. Do you mind if Imfrank? he asked.

Please, she replied sardonically. What did he think? That she had walked clear across the Council grounds pastcurfew so he could ply her with riddles?

He took a deep breath, pacing the room. Ethan Rayne offered for you and the Council was not going to oppose.

Buffy absorbed the information. She nodded, smiling tightly. So you offered as well, to save me from him?

Angel nodded. Crossing the room, he took a seat on the opposite end of the sofa from Buffy. Ethan Raynewould be terrible to you, Buffy, he said seriously. But I dont want you to feel that you have to choose me. Imyour guardian for as long as youre a SIT and I can oppose the marriage on those grounds.

And I do what? she asked thickly. Go back to being a Slayer, to dying for a Council that doesnt give a shitabout me?


16/18

Angel was shocked by the obvious hurt in her voice and turned to face her. Buffy inched farther away. No, itsfine, she said, not looking at him. Please go ahead and petition the Council. Ill go back to being a Slayer.

Is that what you want? he asked, his voice deadly serious.

Buffy looked up at him, tears shimmering in her eyes. I dont want you to whore yourself out to save me, shesaid curtly.

Angel stared at her like she was speaking a foreign language. He shook his head sharply to clear it. "Is thatwhat you think I'm doing?" he asked. "Sacrificing myself to save you from some miserable fate?"

"Isn't it?" Buffy countered thickly.

Angel stared to move and then stopped. Then started and once again stopped, obviously completelydiscombobulated. Taking a deep breath to steel his nerves, he pushed himself off the couch and moved to kneelin front of Buffy.

She watched him, afraid to move. His gaze was shuttered, his eyes unreadable. But, she noticed, they were nolonger filled with icy cold. There was something there, something soft and warm reflected in his gaze. Slowly,he lifted his hand, his fingertips barely resting against her cheekbone, his thumb gently stroking her chin. "Ihave my own reasons for doing this," he said in a near whisper, "and trust me, none of them are particularlyhonorable."

Buffy swallowed thickly, her tongue coming out to wet her dry lips. She parted her lips to speak and had no ideawhat to say. Angel leaned in closer, hesitantly, his motions cautious. Ever so slowly, he pressed his lips to hers.Buffy couldn't help but make a startled little squeak, but she didn't pull away. It was strange. No, more thanstrange. This moment was beyond comprehension. Angel was her guardian, her instructor, the Monk who hadbeen a pain in her ass every second of the day for the last three years. He reveled in making her life hell, inhumiliating her. She hated him.

But if she hated him, why exactly was she kissing him back? Buffy decided such a paltry issue as their hatred forone another could wait until later to be examined. With a soft sigh, she leaned into him, allowing him to deepenthe kiss. His tongue snaked past her lips, finding her own. Buffy made a soft sound. Her hands found hisshoulders, but rather than pushing him away, her short fingernails bit into the corded flesh. Taking this as tacitagreement, Angel used the hand that wasn't cupping her cheek to wind around her waist, pulling her closer tothe edge of the sofa and more in contact with his body.

Her soft breasts crushed against his chest and her arms left his shoulders to twine around his neck. Angelgrowled approvingly deep in his throat, slanting his head and kissing her more passionately. How many timeshad he dreamed of doing this? How long had he ached to know her taste, her scent? He'd spent far moredrunken nights fantasizing about Buffy Summers than he would ever admit. And every single one of thosefantasies paled in comparison to the reality of her in his arms. The absolute softness of her lips, the invitingtaste of her mouth, the divine eroticism of a being so powerful supplicating to him, yielding the sensationsthreatened to crush Angel.

Buffy knew this couldn't be real. For the last three years, she had known exactly who Angel was. She'd knownhow much he reveled in humiliating her, how much he despised her very existence. She knew him inside andout. Right up until about five minutes ago.

The moment his lips touched hers, she realized she didn't know anything about this man. Hell, she'd never evenreally thought of him in terms of being a male. He was simply this thing, a means to an end, something shehad to endure in order to make her way through Council training. But being held so carefully in his arms, beingtouched so reverently, she was quickly re-evaluating her stance on Angel. Obviously, she had been completely

clueless. Buffy wasn't overly knowledgeable about sex, but she did know that a man didn't touch you like thisunless he had quite a bit invested. This wasn't mindless, animal attraction, this was something far more seriousand far scarier.

Panting harshly, she broke off the kiss, resting her forehead against his shoulder as her fingers continued to toywith the hair at the nape of his neck of their own accord. Funny how something so undeniably intimate shouldseem completely natural.

He turned his head, his lips brushing against her ear. "Is that a yes?" he asked, his voice low and soft.


17/18

Taking a deep breath, Buffy lifted her head, staring into the molten heat of his eyes. "I don't know," shequipped. "I don't really know the rules. Do I have to give Ethan Rayne the same chance to plead his case?"

She could hear his teeth grind together and his hands bit into her hips, pulling her more snugly against his body."As your guardian, I would seriously advise against it," he said tightly.

Buffy couldn't help it, she smiled at his obvious jealousy. As my guardian, she repeated with a cheeky grin.

Yes, he replied dryly.

Buffy was tired of talking and of thinking. She wanted more kisses. She leaned into him. Angel took the liberalhint and once again captured her lips with his own. She surrendered even more quickly this time, opening hermouth for him immediately. Oh yes, Buffy Summers was a quick study. He groaned, biting gently on her bottomlip before quickly laving the area with his tongue. She mewled, returning the favor eagerly as she scooted evencloser against him. Her stomach muscles clenched at the feel of him kneeling between her legs, at theunmistakable sensation of his erection pressing into her thigh.

Carefully, Angel toppled her backwards and to the side, laying her full out on the sofa before quickly joining her.He rested on his side, crouched over her as one hand threaded through her hair and the other carefully exploredher curves. They stayed like that for countless moments, touching, kissing, exploring. But eventually, it wasntenough. Buffy whined, looking up at him with a decidedly pouty expression. You know, she said, the bedwould probably be a lot more comfortable.

Ducking his head, Angel peppered kisses along her jawbone. Im sure it would, he conceded. But we cant.

Buffy pulled back far enough to look into his eyes. Her expression was predatory, the same one he saw daily onthe sparring mats. Why not?

He smiled wryly at her, taking a deep breath. Because Im still a Monk, he replied, and trust me when I tellyou that if we move to the bed, keeping my vow of celibacy will become a very big issue.

Buffys body clenched tightly at his bold words. As unthinkable as this situation would have seemed only a fewshort hours ago, she couldnt help but feel irritation at his words. She wanted him, dammit. The realizationshould have given her pause, but it didnt. Buffy had always followed her instincts and right now her instinctswere telling her that this was right. She frowned, huffing her indignation. Well, Im not marrying a Monk, shetold him petulantly.

Angel tried not to smile, he really did. But he failed. She was so damn adorable, an intoxicating mix of innocentand wanton. Just as she was opening her mouth to deliver what undoubtedly would have been some scathingreply, he kissed her again, with far more carnality than he had previously shown. He pressed her back into thecushions, blanketing her body with his own as he insinuated himself between her thighs. He pressed against herintimately, grinding his pelvis against hers, letting her know in no uncertain terms just how much he wanted her.She broke off the kiss, panting harshly even as she wrapped her legs around his waist. He captured her earlobebetween his teeth, worrying it for several seconds before informing her flatly, Rescinding my vow as Monk is atechnicality, he said. One that I will take care of as soon as possible.

Good, Buffy said. She was trying to sound worldly and unaffected but her performance was seriouslyundermined by the fact that her words came out as a breathless gasp.

Angel stared down at her, her body effectively pinned to the sofa by his. She didnt seem upset about this at all.So, is this a yes? he asked again.

Biting down on her bottom lip, Buffy narrowed her eyes at him. She took a deep breath. Yes, she said quietly.

Good, he said, dipping his head to kiss her again.

Just as things threatened to spiral out of control, Angel pulled away. With a groan, he pushed himself into asitting position, running his hand through his spiky hair. Awkwardly, Buffy did the same. She fought to right herclothes, attempting to smooth down her hair with a move that was utterly futile. Her hair was a mess, stickingup everywhere, her clothes were hopelessly askew, her lips were swollen and a blush tinted every visible inch ofskin. She looked like shed spent the last hour being mauled, which considering recent events, really wasnt toofar off the mark.


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So, uh, she stuttered, I guess we have a deal.

Angel cocked his head looking at her with an expression that was completely unreadable. With slow, deliberatereactions, he shifted on the sofa to face her and quickly re-buttoned her shirt. The same shirt she hadnt evenrealized had come unbuttoned. Her blush deepened to crimson. Perhaps he was right to cut things off soabruptly. Thanks, she muttered under her breath.

Angel let out a deep breath. No problem, he replied tightly.

*

Pardon me, but may I help you? Giles asked in a near bellow as he flipped on the light to his office. Somehooligans thought they could go ransacking his office in the middle of the night, well they had another thingcoming. A librarian suffering from insomnia was no ones friend.

Or at least not until Giles realized it was Buffy. And she wasnt ransacking his office. She was sitting at his desklooking through some brightly wrapped packages that most certainly belonged to her. Her gaze met his andquickly flitted away as she blushed. Sorry, she said meekly, I, uh, just stashed these here so my kleptobarracks mates couldnt go through them while I was gone.

Go through what? Giles asked, peering at the presents.

Uh ... troths, Buffy admitted.

Troths, Giles repeated, his brow furrowed. Understanding seemed to blossom. Oh, he said brightly. Two ofthem. Thats marvelous.

Uh ... yeah, Buffy said noncommittally.

And you placed them here so your overly curious fellow SITs wouldnt riffle through them?

You got it, Buffy said.

Giles nodded and looked at her expectantly. Where were you?

Buffy bit down on her bottom lip. Discussing things with Angel, she admitted quietly.

I see, Giles said, his gaze raking over her form speculatively. Given your disheveled appearance, Imassuming you two came to an agreement. His voice was thick with a healthy dose of disapproval and a side ofparental concern.

Unable to meet his gaze, Buffy nodded. I said yes, she mumbled.

Good, Giles chirped. Then you had best get some sleep.

To be continued...

Documents

There but for the Grace WIP