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Mondo Pathways to Writing 4 • 7 Biography / Evelyn Glennie: Feeling the Beat1 The Writing Process: Prewriting a Biography Session 1 Text Type and Process Review Reviewing the Text Type Display the Text Model. Explain that students will be thinking about a familiar text type from an author’s point of view. Check students’ understanding of the features of a biography (see box on page 2) and then read the text to students. Let’s think about biographies. What features does the author have to keep in mind? What examples can you find in this text? Yes, biographies are about the life of an individual, and the events are usually presented in chronological order. What other features of biographies do you notice? Introducing the Writing Process Focus Ask students to talk about the process an author follows from prewriting to publishing. Using the Text Model, have students study the text from the author’s perspective. How do authors begin? Yes, they select an idea, or in this case, a person, as part of the prewriting step. The author of this biography had to select a person to write about. It could be she wanted to write about a musician or she had heard about Evelyn Glennie and wanted to know more about her. What else does the writer need to do to write a biography? Focus on the prewriting step. Point out that in this step, authors generate many ideas and then narrow them down to one. The author probably had many ideas and then selected one. What else would she have to consider? I agree. She would probably need to do some research on Evelyn Glennie. Why is research important during the prewriting step? Deconstructing the Prewriting Step Display the Text Model alongside the Deconstruction Organizer (Chart B). Focus discussion on what the author might have done to order details and facts and fill in Chart B. Your notations may be similar to those at left and on the CD; these represent only one possibility. What do you think the author’s prewriting process was for this biography? What categories did the author use to organize the information found during research? Do you think this is a good way to order these facts? Let’s discuss your opinions. Lesson 7, Part 1 Modeled Writing / Shared Writing Teaching Focuses • Understand the specific purpose and structure of a biography • Select ideas and order thoughts Chart A Text Model Chart B Deconstruction Organizer Materials • Text Model (Chart A) • Deconstruction Organizer (Chart B) 6 Traits Talk: Word Choice Review the importance of using a variety of colorful words to create a powerful piece of writing. Have students find words in the Text Model that the author used instead of more common, everyday words, for example: spotted instead of saw, staring instead of looking, and grinned instead of smiled. Chart B Deconstruction Organizer Person Biographical Features What features did the author include? Audience Who will read the author’s piece? Purpose Why did the author write this piece? Prewriting a Biography Mondo Pathways to Writing 4 · 7 Chart B / Biography Personal Details Highlights Background Information Dates/Timeline Quotes Other Age 8—began playing piano Age 12—almost completely deaf Age 16—accepted at Royal Academy of Music in London “…by associating where on my body I felt the sound with the sense of perfect pitch I had before losing my hearing.” Might play bongos, cymbals, marimba, and a water gong during a performance Owns more than 1,800 instruments Include photo of Glennie Grew up on a farm in Scotland Could hear any tone, or pitch, and name it Lost her hearing at age 12 Became a world-famous solo percussionist despite being deaf Music teacher encouraged her to experiment with sound vibrations. Glennie could feel drum vibrations and recognize the drum’s notes. Became school’s star percussionist Students Teachers To inform readers about Evelyn Glennie’s inspiring life story Evelyn Glennie World-famous percussionist Evelyn Glennie grew up on a Scottish farm. As a girl, she had perfect pitch. She could hear any tone, or pitch, and say its letter name. At age eight, she began playing piano. Around that time, however, she started to have trouble hearing. By age 12, she was almost completely deaf. Glennie read lips to understand what people said, but she was often frustrated by her hearing loss. Then a teacher at school encouraged her to experiment in the music room. Glennie tried putting her hands on the walls to feel a kettledrum’s vibrations. Later she said she recognized the drum’s notes “by associating where on my body I felt the sound with the sense of perfect pitch I had before losing my hearing.” Soon Glennie became her school’s star percussionist. At 16, she was accepted by the Royal Academy of Music in London. Today Glennie is a solo percussionist who performs around the world. During a performance, she might play bongos, cymbals, marimba, and a water gong. In all, Glennie owns more than 1,800 instruments! Nonfiction • Biography Evelyn Glennie: Feeling the Beat Evelyn Glennie: Feeling the Beat The snare drum is Glennie’s favorite instrument. During a performance, she sometimes takes off her shoes to feel the vibrations better. Mondo Pathways to Writing 4 · 7 Chart A / Nonfiction / Biography

The Writing Process: Prewriting a BiographyThe Writing Process: Prewriting a Biography Session 1 Text Type and Process Review Reviewing the Text Later she said she recognized the drum’s

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Mondo Pathways to Writing 4 • 7 Biography / Evelyn Glennie: Feeling the Beat—1

The Writing Process: Prewriting a Biography

Session 1 Text Type and Process Review

ReviewingtheTextType

•DisplaytheTextModel.Explainthatstudentswillbethinkingaboutafamiliartexttypefromanauthor’spointofview.Checkstudents’understandingofthefeaturesofabiography(seeboxonpage2)andthenreadthetexttostudents.

Let’s think about biographies. What features does the author have to keep in mind? What examples can you find in this text? Yes, biographies are about the life of an individual, and the events are usually presented in chronological order. What other features of biographies do you notice?

IntroducingtheWritingProcessFocus

•Askstudentstotalkabouttheprocessanauthorfollowsfromprewritingtopublishing.UsingtheTextModel,havestudentsstudythetextfromtheauthor’sperspective.

How do authors begin? Yes, they select an idea, or in this case, a person, as part of the prewriting step. The author of this biography had to select a person to write about. It could be she wanted to write about a musician or she had heard about Evelyn Glennie and wanted to know more about her. What else does the writer need to do to write a biography?

•Focusontheprewritingstep.Pointoutthatinthisstep,authorsgeneratemanyideasandthennarrowthemdowntoone.

The author probably had many ideas and then selected one. What else would she have to consider? I agree. She would probably need to do some research on Evelyn Glennie. Why is research important during the prewriting step?

DeconstructingthePrewritingStep

•DisplaytheTextModelalongsidetheDeconstructionOrganizer(ChartB).FocusdiscussiononwhattheauthormighthavedonetoorderdetailsandfactsandfillinChartB.YournotationsmaybesimilartothoseatleftandontheCD;theserepresentonlyonepossibility.

What do you think the author’s prewriting process was for this biography? What categories did the author use to organize the information found during research? Do you think this is a good way to order these facts? Let’s discuss your opinions.

Less

on 7

, Par

t 1

Mod

eled

Writ

ing

/ Sh

ared

Writ

ing

Teaching Focuses

• Understand the specific purpose and structure of a biography

• Select ideas and order thoughts

Chart AText Model

Chart BDeconstruction Organizer

Materials

• Text Model (Chart A)• Deconstruction

Organizer (Chart B)

6 Traits Talk: Word Choice

Review the importance of using a variety of colorful words to create a powerful piece of writing. Have students find words in the Text Model that the author used instead of more common, everyday words, for example: spotted instead of saw, staring instead of looking, and grinned instead of smiled.

Chart B

Deconstruction Organizer

Person

Biographical Features What features did the author include?

AudienceWho will read the author’s piece?

PurposeWhy did the author write this piece?

PrewritingaBiography

Mondo Pathways to Writing 4 · 7 Chart B / Biography

Personal Details

Highlights

Background Information

Dates/Timeline

Quotes

Other

Age 8—began playing pianoAge 12—almost completely deafAge 16—accepted at Royal Academy of Music in London

“…by associating where on my body I felt the sound with the sense of perfect pitch I had before losing my hearing.”

Might play bongos, cymbals, marimba, and a water gong during a performanceOwns more than 1,800 instrumentsInclude photo of Glennie

Grew up on a farm in ScotlandCould hear any tone, or pitch, and name itLost her hearing at age 12

Became a world-famous solo percussionist despite being deaf

Music teacher encouraged her to experiment with sound vibrations.Glennie could feel drum vibrations and recognize the drum’s notes.Became school’s star percussionist

StudentsTeachers

To inform readers about Evelyn Glennie’s inspiring life story

Evelyn Glennie

World-famous percussionist Evelyn Glennie grew up on

a Scottish farm. As a girl, she had perfect pitch. She could

hear any tone, or pitch, and say its letter name. At age

eight, she began playing piano. Around that time, however,

she started to have trouble hearing. By age 12, she was

almost completely deaf.

Glennie read lips to understand what people said, but she was

often frustrated by her hearing loss. Then a teacher at school

encouraged her to experiment in the music room. Glennie tried

putting her hands on the walls to feel a kettledrum’s vibrations.

Later she said she recognized the drum’s notes “by associating

where on my body I felt the sound with the sense of perfect

pitch I had before losing my hearing.”

Soon Glennie became her

school’s star percussionist.

At 16, she was accepted by

the Royal Academy of Music

in London.

Today Glennie is a solo

percussionist who performs

around the world. During a

performance, she might play

bongos, cymbals, marimba,

and a water gong. In all,

Glennie owns more than

1,800 instruments!

Nonfiction • Biography

Evelyn Glennie: Feeling the BeatEvelyn Glennie: Feeling the Beat

The snare drum is Glennie’s favorite instrument. During a performance,

she sometimes takes off her shoes to feel the vibrations better.

Mondo Pathways to Writing 4 · 7 Chart A / Nonfiction / Biography

PTW_TM_G4_07_biography_final.indd 1 4/28/11 12:04 PM

PTW_LP_G4_07.indd 1 6/8/11 10:18 AM

Teaching Focuses

• Collect and organize information about a nonfiction topic into categories

• Research a topic using several sources

2—Mondo Pathways to Writing 4 • 7 Biography / Evelyn Glennie: Feeling the Beat

Session 2 Modeled Writing: Prewriting

ReflectingonPrewriting

•Recallwithstudentsthediscussiononthewritingprocessfromtheprevioussession.Explainthatinthissession,youwillmodeltheprewritingstepforadifferentbiography.

Last time we examined a biography of Evelyn Glennie. Let’s briefly recall some of the things the author might have asked herself during the prewriting step. Today I’m going to model how I might prewrite a biography about another interesting person, Michelle Obama.

GeneratingandRecordingtheTeacher’sThoughts

•DisplaythePrewritingOrganizer(ChartC).Helpstudentsseewhatagoodwriterthinksanddoeswhileprewriting.Youmaychooseyourowntopicorusetheexampleshownbelow.

Who would I like to write about? This is my first big decision. The person has to be interesting or inspiring enough to grab my readers’ attention. That reminds me. Who will my audience of readers be? What will the purpose of my writing be?

•Besurestudentsunderstandthatyouresearchedthepersonyouselectedpriortothelesson.AdddetailstoyourPrewritingOrganizerasyoutalkaboutwhatyoulearned.

After selecting the person, audience, and purpose, I needed some information. First I wrote questions I wanted answered. What was her childhood like? What are some important events in her life? Then I thought about where I could find details and facts about this person. What are several sources I might use? I found books and a magazine

article at our library and I used the Internet. Then I organized the information. What do you think about my categories?

•Whenyouhaveenoughinformation,revisitthePrewritingOrganizertoreviewthekeyelementsofprewritingabiography.

I still need to check a few things: Have I considered my audience and purpose? Do I have enough details and facts, or should I do more research? Is there a better way to group the information? My readers will expect this biography to be up-to-date and in chronological order. Should I number the ideas on the Prewriting Organizer? How will ordering ideas during prewriting help me when I draft?

ReflectingontheModeledPrewriting

•Whenyouhavecompletedyourmodeledlesson,talkwithstudentsaboutwhatgoodwritersaskthemselvesduringprewriting.

What was the first thing I did? Yes, I chose a subject for my biography. Then I did research to collect information about my subject. As I worked on prewriting today, I organized the facts and details under headings. How did this help me order my thoughts? Talk with the person beside you about the prewriting strategies you observed today.

YoumaywishtosavethecompletedorganizertoreferenceinSession3.

Chart CPrewriting Organizer

Chart C

Prewriting Organizer

PrewritingaBiography

Mondo Pathways to Writing 4 · 7 Chart C / Biography

Person

Biographical Features What features do I need to include?

AudienceWho will read my biography?

PurposeWhy am I writing this?

Personal Details

Highlights

Background Information

Dates/Timeline

Quotes

Other

1992—married Barack Obama1998—daughter Malia Anne was born2001—daughter Natasha (Sasha) was born2009— became First Lady of the United States

“I am the product of a working-class background…I saw hard work and sacrifi ce every day.”

Include photo of Michelle Obama

• born January 17, 1964, in Chicago, Illinois

• grew up in an apartment in Chicago• Craig is her older brother

First Lady of the United States• supports military families• planted an organic garden at the White House• began a campaign to help stop childhood

obesity; the program is called “Let’s Move!”

• skipped second grade• high school honor student• graduated from Princeton University

and Harvard Law School

StudentsTeachers

Michelle Obama

To inform people about Michelle Obama’s interesting life story

Materials

Revising Organizer (Chart C)

• Inform about an individual’s life

• Are written in chronological order

• Use descriptive language• Present career highlights and

important achievements• Include details of family

history• Use quotes, comments from

others, and recounting of events

Features of Biographies

PTW_LP_G4_07.indd 2 6/8/11 10:18 AM

Mondo Pathways to Writing 4 • 7 Biography / Evelyn Glennie: Feeling the Beat—3

Session 3 Shared Writing: Prewriting (Authorial)

ReviewingthePrewritingStep

•DisplayacleancopyofthePrewritingOrganizer(ChartC).Introducethefocusesforthissessionasyoureviewtheprewritingstep.Thensharewithstudentsthetaskofprewritingabiography.

What do we find out about in a biography? Yes, we learn about the life of an interesting person. The first task in prewriting a biography is to decide who to write about. It’s a good idea to start by generating a lot of ideas. Who do you want to learn more about? Turn to your partner and discuss your ideas. You’ll probably mention a lot of different people. That’s good! We have lots of good ideas to choose from. How will we decide which person to write about? What do biography writers do after they select their subject? Yes, they do research.

GeneratingandRecordingStudents’Thoughts

•Givestudentsanopportunitytocontributetheirideasforthesharedprewritingofabiography.Recordtheirsuggestions,andthenencouragestudentstoconsiderhowtoresearchthesubjecttheyhavechosenusingseveralsources.

How will you research the person you chose? What kinds of sources can we use to find facts and details? Let’s talk about where we could find information about our subject, Tony Hawk. Yes, we could use sports magazines or the Internet. What other sources could we use? These are all good ideas! How might we organize the facts and details we collect? Let’s put together a list of headings, or categories.

•Asstudentsthinkaboutthetopic,jotdowntheirideasonthePrewritingOrganizer,focusingonorganizinginformationintocategories.

What else do you want to find out about Tony Hawk? Where does the information belong on the Prewriting Organizer? Do we need to add another category . . . maybe statistics? Great idea! We’ll include when he set skateboarding records. What other ideas do you have?

ReflectingonthePrewritingStep

•Whenyouhaveconcludedthesharedwritingsession,allowtimeforstudentstodiscusshowworkingthroughtheprewritingsteptodaywillhelpthemastheydrafttheirbiographyandwhentheywriteindependently.

Today we focused on generating lots of topics and then deciding on the best one to write about. Why is this important to do? Remember to think about the audience and purpose of your writing. When you write your own biography, you’ll need to research your topic. What sources might you use? Organize the information you collect in categories so that you can order your thoughts before drafting.

Atthispointitissafetodiscardanysavedsamplesorcompletedorganizers.However,thisisentirelyoptional.

Teaching Focuses

• Generate a wide variety of topics and ideas

• Research a topic using several sources

Teacher Tip

Help students generate a variety of topics and ideas during prewriting by thinking aloud as they consider new ideas, by writing lists of possible topics, and by talking about topics that are interesting to them.

Materials

Prewriting Organizer (Chart C)

ELL Support

Give students a sketchpad to capture, in drawings, people or topics they may want to write about. Help students label their drawings with words. Say the words as you point to the drawings and have students repeat. Encourage them to add drawings often so that they will have a ready store of topics when it’s time to write.

PTW_LP_G4_07.indd 3 6/8/11 10:18 AM

4—Mondo Pathways to Writing 4 • 7 Biography / Evelyn Glennie: Feeling the Beat

From Prewriting to Publishing: Biography

Teaching Focus

Develop the ideas in a more complicated topic

Session 1 Shared Writing: Prewriting (Authorial)

ChoosingaTopic

•DisplaythePrewritingOrganizer(ChartD)sothateachstudentcanseeit.Tellstudentstheywillbeprewritingabiography.Workwiththemtogenerateatopicandbeginresearch.

Who can remind us about the type of text we have been prewriting? What are some special features of this text type? Now let’s use what we know about these features to write a biography of our own. Who might be an interesting subject? Wow! You have some good ideas. But we have to pick one. Okay, let’s write about the Mexican artist Diego Rivera. How will we be able to fill out the Prewriting Organizer? What do we need to do?

GeneratingandRecordingStudents’Thoughts

•Afterstudentshavehadtimetoresearchtheirsubject,havethemfocusontheaudienceandpurpose.

What is our purpose for writing? Do we want to entertain or inform? Maybe both? Who might read our biography? Diego Rivera was an artist who painted fantastic murals. Who might be interested in this?

•Theteacher’sroleinthisprocessistohelpstudentsengageinwritingexperiencesthatarericherandmorecomplicatedthanthosetheymaybeabletohandleindependently.CallattentiontotheheadingsonthePrewritingOrganizer.Guidestudentstoseehowthecategoriescanhelpthemastheyprewritetheirbiography.

Take a minute to look at the headings on the Prewriting Organizer. How can they help us write our biography? What other categories would you like to add? What questions might our readers have? Yes, when we draft we’ll need to answer these questions for our readers. Where might we find the answers?

ReflectingonthePrewritingStep

•Attheendofthesession,readandrecaptheideasthatstudentsgeneratedduringprewriting.Givethemtimetoreflectontheirwork.

Take a look at what we did during prewriting. First we talked about who we could write about. Once we came up with a subject we liked, we had to do some research. We collected information from several sources. What did we need to check before moving on to drafting? That’s right. We needed to make sure we’d gathered enough details about Rivera’s life and that we’d answered all the questions we had when we started.

Besuretosavestudents’workforuseinSession2.

Less

on 7

, Par

t 2

Sha

red

Writ

ing

Materials

Prewriting Organizer (Chart D)

Remind students to keep the idea they selected in focus. Mention that including details and facts that aren’t related to the idea are distracting and can make it difficult for readers to understand a piece of writing.

6 Traits Talk: Ideas

PTW_LP_G4_07.indd 4 6/8/11 10:18 AM

Mondo Pathways to Writing 4 • 7 Biography / Evelyn Glennie: Feeling the Beat—5

Session 2 Shared Writing: Drafting (Authorial)

ReflectingonthePrewritingOrganizer

•DisplaythecompletedPrewritingOrganizer(ChartD)fromtheprevioussession.Askstudentstoreflectontheideasgeneratedduringprewriting.

Let’s discuss the choices we made as writers. Are there some additions we should make? Yes, maybe we should let readers know about the size of Rivera’s murals. On the other hand, is there anything we should delete—something that readers wouldn’t find very interesting or relevant? Tell us why you think that idea is not worth keeping. Do we all agree?

DraftingStudents’Work

•DisplaythePrewritingOrganizerandtheDraftingOrganizerside-by-side.Helpstudentsusetheirprewritingideastocomposeadraft.TheDraftingOrganizerservesasaninstructionaltooltohelpexplainanddemonstratethisstepofthewritingprocess.Typicallyagraphicorganizerwouldnotbenecessarytotheindependentwritingprocessatthispoint.Takesometimetoshowhowinferencesmayleadtoinaccuracies.

Are you ready to write? Don’t worry too much about spelling, punctuation, or grammar right now. We’ll look at those later. We just need to get our ideas down on paper. How do you think we should start our biography? Yes, we can start with Rivera’s childhood. On our Prewriting Organizer, we wrote that Rivera was born to a well-to-do family. This fact came from a book we read about famous artists. Who has an idea for a strong opening? “As a child, Rivera had everything.” Does everyone agree? Good point. Just because Rivera came from a wealthy family doesn’t mean he had everything. This is a wrong assumption, or inference, that we made based on a single fact. In a biography, we need to be sure to present facts so that they tell the true story. Who can suggest another opening?

•Continuedraftingthebiographybyorganizingandsequencingideas.Givestudentsanopportunitytosharetheirunderstandingofthedraftingstep.Makesuretheyknowtheimportanceofpresentinginformationaccurately.

Let’s think about how to put our biography in chronological order. How might the headings help? How can we tell what happened first, next, and so on in this person’s life? Good point. Making a timeline could help us organize events in time order. Before we move on, let’s be sure we have copied dates correctly. Did we use the speaker’s exact words in the quotes we used?

ReflectingontheDraftingStep

•Havestudentsreflectonthedraftingstep.Helpthemtounderstandthevalueofhavingconnectedtheirideasinasustainedpieceofwriting,howeverrough.

“To begin writing is to be half done.” What do you think this statement means? Right. We’ve got our ideas down, and now we have a draft to work with. Our biography will change as we complete the next steps in the writing process, revising and editing. We may only be half done, but we’re off to a strong start. Some would say that the hardest part is behind us.

BesuretosavethecompleteddraftforuseinSession3.Youmaychoosetotransferittotheblankscreenortochartpaper.

Teaching Focus

Quote accurately from a text when explaining what the text says explicitly and when drawing inferences from text

ELL Support

As you move on to drafting, support students by helping them express a series of events in a person’s life. Introduce them to common time order words, such as first, next, then, and last.

Materials

• Completed Prewriting Organizer (Chart D)

• Drafting Organizer (Chart E)• Drafting Pointers• Blank Screen or Chart Paper

(optional)

Teacher Tip

You may wish to have students brainstorm in small groups as they consider possible openings and closings for the piece. If you hear interesting comments, ask students to tell you more or to share with the group.

Drafting Pointers

PTW_LP_G4_07.indd 5 6/9/11 4:23 PM

6—Mondo Pathways to Writing 4 • 7 Biography / Evelyn Glennie: Feeling the Beat

Session 3 Shared Writing: Revising (Authorial)

RevisitingStudents’Text

•Invitestudentstoreviewthefirstdraftoftheirbiography.Explainthatduringtherevisingsteptheywilllookforwaystoimprovetheirdraft.Introducetheteachingfocus.

Last session we finished our first draft. Who would like to volunteer to read our biography-in-progress? While the rest of us follow along, let’s think about what questions we should ask ourselves about the writing. Great! You asked if events were in the right order, if facts were accurate, and if word choices were colorful, precise, and fresh. We look at all of these elements when we revise. Is there anything we can improve? Maybe we can make our biography stronger by looking at how our sentences are organized in paragraphs. Today let’s concentrate on making sure that each paragraph has a main idea and interesting details to support it. How can we do this?

RevisingtheText

•ReviewtheRevisingRubricwithstudents.Explainthatduringrevisinggoodwriterslookforwaystomaketheirwritingclearer.Discusswithstudentshowthetextcouldbeimprovedbylookingathowthesentencesfittogetherinparagraphs.

I’m going to read our biography aloud again. Listen for the flow of sentences and paragraphs. Does our writing make sense? You noticed that one paragraph was not quite right. There was something about it that disrupted the flow—that made it hard to understand. How might we rearrange the sentences? Do we need to add or delete sentences so that all the sentences are about the same topic? Great! In what ways does this revision make our writing clearer?

ReflectingontheRevisingStep

•Attheendofthesession,allowstudentstimetotalkaboutthebiographyandthenrereadit.Bringthesessiontoaclosebyhavingstudentsthinkabouttherevisingstep.

How was the Revising Rubric helpful? Remember you can refer to these tips when you are writing independently. How is reading aloud a useful strategy? Yes, it let us hear where the sentences didn’t flow and where our writing just didn’t make sense. Do we all agree that this piece is ready for editing now?

Remembertosavethereviseddraftforuseinthenextsession.

Teaching Focus

Construct unified, cohesive paragraphs

ELL Support

Provide students with practice creating a topic sentence for a paragraph. Show the cover of a nonfiction photo book that clearly illustrates what the book is about. Read the title and talk about the photo. Then have students predict what the book might be about. Provide a frame for the discussion: The book (title) is about _____.

Revising Rubric

Revising Rubric

Biography

Mondo Pathways to Writing 4 · 7 Revising Rubric / Biography

Does my opening make the reader want to learn more about the person?

Have I used descriptive language?

Are the facts about the person accurate?

Have I written the events in the correct order?

Have I included details of the person’s family history?

Have I included interesting career highlights and achievements?

Does the person seem real?

Does my writing make sense?

Could I say anything more clearly?

What can I add or delete?

Did I remember to refer to my prewriting and drafting charts?

Am I happy with my writing?

Materials

• Students’ completed draft• Revising Rubric• Blank screen or chart paper

Share: A Writer on Writing

“I have at least one hundred ideas in a folder in my file drawer. Ideas are not the hard part. Neither is research, though some stories are harder to track down than others. Writing the story is the hard part. Finding the way to shape it, to tell it in the most interesting way, is what it’s all about.” —Doreen Rappaport, author of Abe’s Honest Words: The Life of Abraham Lincoln and other biographies

Teacher Tip

You may wish to transfer the shared text onto the blank screen provided on the CD-ROM or onto chart paper. This will make the editing process easier to accomplish. Alternatively, you might ask a student or two to do it, neatly and accurately. If possible, write on alternate lines for maximum editing space.

PTW_LP_G4_07.indd 6 6/8/11 10:18 AM

Mondo Pathways to Writing 4 • 7 Biography / Evelyn Glennie: Feeling the Beat—7

Session 4 Shared Writing: Editing (Secretarial)

ReviewingEditingStrategies

•Inthissession,helpstudentschecktherevisedstoryforconventionsbeforetheymoveontopublishing.DirectattentiontotheEditing&PublishingPointersposterandtheProofreadingMarkschart.Thenfocusonspellingstrategies.Writethefollowingsentenceandhelpstudentsapplyspellingstrategiestoeditit:“Myfreindshavebenhelpingme,”anseredMax.

What is the next step in the writing process? Yes, this is when we edit our writing. What do we usually check during editing? That’s right. We look closely to be sure our grammar, capitalization, punctuation, and spelling are correct. The Editing Pointers can help us. First, let’s talk about spelling. It’s important to develop strategies or ways to spell correctly. What are some things you can do? Yes, you can look for spelling patterns. Think about memorizing words. Do good spellers do this? Of course—especially words that they use often. Sometimes you can spell a word the way it sounds, but beware of silent letters. Other times you might have to use a dictionary or spell checker. Let’s practice with the sentence I’ve written.

EditingtheText

•Togetherwithstudents,begineditingthestory.Explainthatthisisthelastopportunitytomakesurethattheirwritingiscorrectineverydetail.

Now, it’s time to think like editors. We’ll need to look at every detail of our story. Why do you think it’s best to check for one convention at a time? Let’s start with grammar. You’re right. This is a fragment. We need to add a subject to make it a complete sentence. Oops! We forgot to use capital letters on the important words in the poem Max recited, “Casey at the Bat.” I agree, let’s use a period instead of an exclamation point. The sentence is too long to be an exclamation. Finally, we’ll focus on spelling. If a word is misspelled, what strategy can we use to figure out the correct spelling?

ReflectingontheEditingStep

•Havestudentsreflectontheeditstheymadeinthissession.Helpthemappreciatehowcorrectingforconventionshelpsmakeapieceofwriting

easytoreadandunderstand.

Think about the editing corrections we made today. What spelling strategies did we use? How does checking for conventions help our readers? Remember that proofreading marks are like a neat code you can use to remind yourself what needs fixing. You’ll be able to use those marks for the rest of your writing life! Talk with a partner about how what we did today will help when you write on your own.

Teaching Focus

Produce complete sentences, recognizing and correcting inappropriate fragments and run-ons

Share

Try editing for one convention at a time. Check the entire piece of writing for correct use of capital letters. Then go back to the beginning to check for punctuation, then for grammar, and then for spelling.

Ask students to talk about why good writers avoid run-on sentences. What makes them hard for readers to understand? Then discuss whether sentence fragments are ever acceptable. Do fragments ever improve the writing?

6 Traits Talk: Conventions

Materials

• Students’ revised text• Editing & Publishing Pointers

Poster• Proofreading Marks

Teacher Tip

Photocopy or download and print copies of the Proofreading Marks chart from the guidebook or the CD-ROM for students to reference during this session or while writing independently if the poster is not easily viewed.

Editing & Publishing Pointers

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8—Mondo Pathways to Writing 4 • 7 Biography / Evelyn Glennie: Feeling the Beat

Session 5 Shared Writing: Publishing (Secretarial)

ReviewingPublishingStrategies

•Givestudentstheopportunitytodebateanddeterminethewayinwhichthepieceisgoingtobepublished.Remindthemtokeepinmindthetexttype,purpose,andaudienceastheytalkaboutchoices.

Our biography is looking good! How do you think we should publish it? Let’s keep our audience and purpose in mind. What is the best way to present our biography? A chapter book is a great idea. What about a nonfiction graphic novel? Wouldn’t it be fun to create the illustrations and add speech balloons? A fold-out book for younger students may work, too. We could add a timeline of important dates along the bottom of the fold-out pages. Okay, let’s decide.

PublishingandPresentingtheWork

•Providematerialsandequipmentstudentswillneedtopublishtheirbiographyintheirchosenformat.Thenhelpstudentscarryouttheirpublishingdecisions.

I agree that a chapter book is a good way to publish our writing. We’ve already talked a lot about the sentences that make up the paragraphs. Now let’s group our paragraphs into chapters. What is a good heading for each group of paragraphs? Good idea—we’ll add a table of contents. It will help our readers find information in our book quickly. Before we are finished, who will volunteer to add a few illustrations with captions? Who would like to make a final, neat copy?

•Intheculminatingstepofthewritingprocess,presentingtheworktoanaudience,makesurestudentsappreciatewhatthey’veaccomplished.Helpthempreparetosharetheirpublishedwork.

Perfect! Our biography is published! It looks wonderful, and we all know it has a lot of information for readers. What are some ideas for sharing it with an audience? Yes, we could make a hardback cover and put it in the school library with the other biographies. What are some other thoughts?

ReflectingonthePublishingStep

•Invitestudentstothinkaboutwhatthey’velearnedbypublishingtheirwork.Askthemtoconsiderwhattheywoulddothesameordifferentlynexttime.

Yes! We’ve finished our biography of Diego Rivera and learned a lot about this talented painter. Who can review the steps of the writing process we went through to get to this point? Are you happy with the way we decided to publish it? Let’s discuss how you will use what we learned as we published this piece. How will this help the next time you write a biography?

Teaching Focus

Use a wide range of text features, such as illustration, headings, captions, charts, and graphs, to enhance understanding

Share

When adding text features, such as timelines or captions for photographs, be sure to check the information carefully. Use at least two sources to help you make certain that your facts are correct.

Materials

• Students’ revised, edited text• Various materials based on

publishing format selected• Editing & Publishing Pointers

Teacher Tip

Provide recycled magazines, links to approved Web sites that show images, or inexpensive cameras so that students have the option of adding photos to their published pieces.

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Mondo Pathways to Writing 4 • 7 Biography / Evelyn Glennie: Feeling the Beat—9

Chart B

Deconstruction Organizer

Person

Biographical Features What features did the author include?

AudienceWho will read the author’s piece?

PurposeWhy did the author write this piece?

PrewritingaBiography

Mondo Pathways to Writing 4 · 7 Chart B / Biography

Personal Details

Highlights

Background Information

Dates/Timeline

Quotes

Other

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10—Mondo Pathways to Writing 4 • 7 Biography / Evelyn Glennie: Feeling the Beat

Chart C

Prewriting Organizer

PrewritingaBiography

Mondo Pathways to Writing 4 · 7 Chart C / Biography

Person

Biographical Features What features do I need to include?

AudienceWho will read my biography?

PurposeWhy am I writing this?

Personal Details

Highlights

Background Information

Dates/Timeline

Quotes

Other

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Mondo Pathways to Writing 4 • 7 Biography / Evelyn Glennie: Feeling the Beat—11

Chart D

Prewriting Organizer

PrewritingaBiography

Mondo Pathways to Writing 4 · 7 Chart D / Biography

Biographical Features What features do I need to include?

Person

AudienceWho will read my piece?

PurposeWhy am I writing this piece?

Family History

Education

Talents

Career Achievements

Comments from Others

Anecdote (a short true story)

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12—Mondo Pathways to Writing 4 • 7 Biography / Evelyn Glennie: Feeling the Beat

Chart E

Drafting Organizer

DraftingaBiographyRefer to the Prewriting Organizer as you write a fi rst draft from beginning to end.

Mondo Pathways to Writing 4 · 7 Chart E / Biography

Opening

Bio Events

Closing

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