The University Observer: Volume XVI, Issue 7

NE QUID FALSE DICERE AUDEAT NE QUID VERI NON AUDEATVOLUME XVI ISSUE 7

Fire disrupts Science building worksA minor fi re broke out in the UCD

Science Centre South, informally known as the Chemistry Block, last Wednesday aft ernoon, 13th January.

Crews from two units of the Dublin Fire Brigade, aided by a basket crane, successfully battled to bring the fi re un-der control and stop it spreading to the rest of the building.

It is believed that the blaze broke out when an overheated boiler exploded, causing materials in the plant room located on the fourth fl oor to catch fi re. However, this is still under investiga-tion and could not be confi rmed by the university at the time of print.

Th e fi re occurred in a section of the building which is currently under con-

UCD volunteers leave Haiti three days before earthquake

organise things.” She also told Th e Uni-versity Observer that any students with ideas for events to raise funds should contact UCDVO.

O’Connor commented that the staff and student response to the appeal has been very strong. UCDVO volunteers have been collecting on Grafton Street

since the quake, and O’Connor hopes that they will be able to continue to do so throughout the week. She expressed happiness at the fact that “staff have contacted us saying that they want to do something when term starts back.”

Th e organisation is to hold a night-club event in BaseBar this Friday to

raise money for the relief eff orts, and tickets will be on sale around campus. Donations will be accepted at UCDVO’s website, www.ucdvo.org, and any staff or students who interested in getting involved in fundraising can call the UCD Volunteers Overseas offi ce at (01) 7167793.

COLIN SWEETMAN

Former UCD employee jailed for child abuse

A former UCD employee has been jailed for two years for the indecent assault of 19 boys in the 1960s. Seán John Drummond, a former Christian Brother and a Library Assistant at UCD, committed the crimes while working as a Second Class teacher in a Limerick na-tional school. Drummond was sentenced on 10th December at Limerick Circuit Court.

Th e court heard that Drummond was moved to another class and then to an-other school after a parent complained about his behaviour .

Drummond, who was 19 at the time of the crimes, subsequently left the religious order in 1970. He has since married and had children, and had been living in Ballinteer. Th e crimes were fi rst reported in 2005, after which all pupils of the class he taught were contacted by the Gardaí.

Judge Carroll Moran stated that the prolonged abuse had had a “traumatic eff ect on young boys who were at an impressionable and young age.” He also acknowledged that fact that Drum-mond had been able to move on and live a relatively stable life, while those he abused faced a number of problems, including alcohol and drug abuse, mari-tal problems and learning diffi culties. He also commented that Drummond’s sentence would have been less strict in the 1970s and that he had taken into account the number of victims, as well as the length of time over which the abuse had occurred.

Providing a psychological profi le of the convicted, a senior psychologist for the Granada Institute, Fergal Rooney,

Observer Digest

DPP considered SU action over condoms

NEWS

State papers reveal that SU faced legal action over 1979 condom machineP2

Hopeless-hagen

COMMENT

Th e world wasted a golden chance to address climate changeP25

Ladies lose to Loreto

SPORT

UCD Hockey team pipped 1-0 in tight encounterP30

BRIDGET FITZSIMONS

The University ObserverIRELAND’S AWARD-WINNING STUDENT NEWSPAPER19th January 2009

Twelve members of the UCD Volunteers Overseas (UCD-VO) charity group left Haiti just days before the country

was struck by a massive earthquake. Th e earthquake, which occurred on Tuesday 13th January and measured 7.0 on the Richter scale, is estimated to have caused the deaths of between 30,000 and 200,000 people.

Th e alumni volunteers for UCDVO had been participating in development works in Gros Morne, a town situ-ated about fi ve hours north of Port-au-Prince. Th ey had constructed two houses in the two weeks that they had been in the town and fl ew out of Port-au-Prince on Saturday. Th e team arrived back in Dublin on Monday, a day before the earthquake hit Haiti. Th is year had been the fi rst that an alumni project had been put in place to visit Haiti.

UCDVO’s Manager Caroline O’Connor expressed her relief that she and her team had made it home safely and that those involved in their projects were safe, including their missionary partners the Sisters of Jesus and Mary. O’Connor stated that UCDVO were “in touch with them on Wednesday and the town of Gros Morne hasn’t been directly aff ected by the quake” and that “two of the missionaries have gone down to Port-au-Prince with supplies”.

UCDVO began an appeal for funds to aid the relief operations in Haiti on last Wednesday (January 14th) and are continuing fundraising eff orts this week. O’Connor has appealed to UCD students who wish to get involved to get in contact, saying that UCDVO are “looking for more ideas and help to

BRIDGET FITZSIMONS

Noah’s Egg provided some comic relief amid the misery of the cold weather last week. Th e Belfi eld campus was shut due to the extreme

weather conditions for the second time in eleven months. Photo: Colin Scally

struction and therefore no students or staff were faced with immediate danger. Only a small number of students were present in the building at the time and evacuation was rapid and trouble-free. Plumes of thick smoke could be seen billowing from the rooft op with winds carrying the smoke northwards through the campus.

Aft er the fi re alarm was activated, UCD Buildings & Services investigated the incident and immediately contacted the city fi re service, who arrived on scene within minutes. Additional ‘height units’ were called in from Pearse Street station, as the fi re took place on top of a four-storey building.

According to Buildings & Services, all boilers are regularly serviced in accor-dance with standard Health and Safety

procedures. Th is does not rule out such an incident happening again, although it is speculated that the severe cold spell may have compelled the boiler to be overused.

A spokesperson for the university stated that the fi re was limited to the plant room on the roof of Science South A1. “As this area of the building is due for renovation, it had been stripped back to a shell in advance of any works,” he said. “Th ere were no injuries, and the result of the localised fi re will not aff ect ongoing renovations.”

Th e University Observer had contacted Dublin Fire Brigade for clarifi cation on the nature of the fi re and its eff ects, but had not received a response at the time of going to print.

Th e Science complex is currently un-

dergoing a large-scale renovation project as part of the University’s extensive plans to regenerate the Belfi eld campus. Other works include an Arts extension and the construction of the new Student Centre.

Continued on P3 >>

19th January 2009

ON THIS DAY IN HISTORY...

1941: Wrestler and UCD toilet door hero Pat Patterson is born in Mon-treal

PULLOUT SPECIALREVIEW OF THE DECADEThe University Observer’s retrospective on the noughties

WE CAST A LOOK BACK OVER THE LAST TEN YEARS AND REVIEW THE GOOD, THE BAD AND THE UGLY OF THE NOUGHTIES INSIDE

SUPPLEMENTWILL ‘WE WILL

ROCK YOU’ ACTUALLY ROCK

YOU? INSIDE

REVIEW OF THE DECADE

THE UNIVERSITY OBSERVER 19.01.102

NEWS [email protected]

Student Centre restaurant Café Brava has reopened for business with an overhaul of its buff et lunch menu. Th e new options

available consist mainly of a number of Chinese-style dishes, as an alternative to the original selection of traditional fast food, some of which is still on the menu.

A typical selection from the new menu includes sweet chilli chicken wings, southern fried chicken in barbecue sauce, sweet and sour pork and vegeta-bles, fried rice with egg and peas, plain pilau rice, and a range of vegetables. Th e

buff et currently costs 80c per 100g.Café Brava manager Des Moran said

that “we did a bit of research around the campus to fi nd out what people would really like to see on off er, and the Chi-nese option proved the most popular.” Th e café will continue to off er their tradi-tional fast food menu items also.

Moran believes the new selection will be a crucial factor in attracting new customers in 2010. He told Th e Univer-sity Observer that “we are always open to suggestions. If somebody approaches us and says, ‘Why don’t you try a traditional Irish stew?’, then chances are there will be a traditional Irish stew on the menu the following week. If it goes well, then

it stays, until it begins to lose popularity. It just turns out that currently, people are very keen on these particular dishes. With the system we are running here, we can always switch things up from one week to another, to accommodate for what people want.”

Like the majority of catering estab-lishments around the country, Cafe Brava experienced a fall in revenue for 2009, which Moran has blamed on the economic downturn. When asked whether further changes are planned in Café Brava, Moran said that “for now, we’ll keep going with things the way we are,” and that the new menu “seems to be working.”

Café Brava turns Chinese for New Year

LOUIS WESTWATER

Postgraduate Open Day 2010

Taught & Research Opportunities

www.tcd.ie/Graduate_Studies/openday2010/

Meet the experts and discuss your options at the Postgraduate Open Day

Date: Thursday 28th January 2010 Venue: Public Theatre/Exam Hall Time: 4pm-7pm

Photo: Gavan Reilly

Th e university was forced to shut down both the Belfi eld and Blackrock cam-puses for three days last week because of deteriorating weather condition on the campus.

Th e campus was closed from Saturday 9th January until Tuesday 12th January for health and safety reasons, due to the worsening weather and underfoot condi-tions on the campus.

Bad weather had aff ected much of the country for a prolonged period. Snow and ice made both walking and driv-ing conditions extremely treacherous, especially in urban areas where black ice was prevalent.

Th e university had asked staff not to enter the campus except for essential academic or operational activity. Despite this, staff were allowed to access their offi ces to collect papers or essential work, as the closure occurred during the uni-versity’s exam-marking week.

Students living on campus were also

asked to delay their return to the resi-dences until the 12th if possible, although the student residences remained open. All gates into campus, with the exception of the main N11 entrance, were closed.

While most of the buildings were shut, the Veterinary Hospital remained opened and any research activity that the univer-sity deemed essential was to continue as normal. Services that operated indepen-dent of UCD and any construction work on campus did not fall under purview of the university and it was decided by their operators whether they would open dur-ing the closure or not.

A spokesperson for the university could not disclose if UCD had plans in place in case the weather deteriorates again over the coming weeks, saying that the bad weather experienced earlier this month is not expected by Met Éireann to return in the coming months.

Th e university decided to reopen the campus on the 12th aft er an improve-ment in weather conditions and a review of the campus deemed it safe to operate normally.

Snowy weather forces campus to shut downQUINTON O’REILLY

19.01.10 THE UNIVERSITY OBSERVER 3

UCD Students’ Union President Gary Redmond has renewed calls for a wholescale reform of the third level maintenance grant system as the SU released results of a survey of the ad-ministration costs incurred by County Councils across the country.

The survey’s results revealed huge discrepancies between the costs in-curred by each County Council. West-meath recorded the lowest expenses, spending €70.51 on administration costs per grant processed, while North Tipperary topped the chart, spend-ing €484.25 on each application. The figures were secured after Freedom of

Information requests to each Council.Redmond stated that “students’

unions across Ireland have been calling on the Minister for a number of years now to centralise the grant application process,” and said that a centralised system would be cheaper on the state as well as being easier to navigate for students. He estimated that a cen-tralised grants system would save the government in the region of €20 mil-lion each year.

Redmond described the differences in administration costs between the county councils as “absolutely huge”, and shared that the UCDSU survey had “brought to light the argument that a central grants authority would be able to do this far cheaper.” Redmond

has received a letter from the Depart-ment of Education that ensured that “the matters are being brought under investigation.”

Redmond has also asked that appli-cations for the grants system be opened in advance of CAO offers being made, so that new and continuing students can apply early and allow extra time for county councils to process their applications.

Among other changes that Redmond has proposed is to make all grant pay-ments directly into students’ accounts, to minimise cheque stamp duty. Red-mond also wants to see the frequency of grant payments examined, with monthly or biannual payments studied as possible alternative options.

Documents released by the state earlier this month revealed that the Director of Public Prosecu-

tions (DPP) had considered taking legal action against UCD students in 1979 for selling condoms on campus.

The letter, which was released by the State under the 30-year rule, also revealed that the DPP and the Attorney General would have decided against taking a case against the students, be-lieving that the courts would have found the ban on the sale of contraceptives to be unconstitutional.

The State papers show that the DPP and Attorney General had discussed whether proceedings should be initi-ated against UCD and a Dublin shop, Contraceptives Unlimited, under the Criminal Law Amendment Act 1935 which made it illegal to sell condoms.

The first contraceptive vending machine in the State was installed in Belfield in January 1979 by the Students’ Union, with a pack of four condoms costing 50p. The machine proved

popular, selling over 160 condoms per day, before it was removed by college authorities less than a week after it was installed.

The DPP stated that those in-volved in the trade clearly wished to provoke a prosecution to challenge it in the High Court as the law ban-ning contraception would not be upheld as it was introduced before 1937, when the constitution was enacted, as well as the act appear-ing to be in contravention of the constitution.

Minister for Health at the time, Charles Haughey, introduced the Family Planning Bill in late Febru-ary 1979 to make contraception available by prescription, famously describing the proposed system as being “an Irish solution to an Irish problem”.

Elsewhere in the State papers, it is revealed that Haughey, after becoming Taoiseach, was impatient with sugges-tions from his advisors that there was no possibility of immediately moving the UCD Agricultural and Engineering faculty out of the former UCD College of Science building on Merrion St to its

new premises in Belfield.Haughey also decided that the Office

of Public Works should seek to acquire the College of Art premises adjacent to the Dáil because of his belief, supported by an OPW report, that this was the only way to meet the accommodation requirements of the Oireachtas.

The decisions were made at a meeting on 28th December 1979, less than three weeks after Haughey became Taoiseach.

At the same meeting, he had dismissed a IR£4m plan to build an official residence for the Taoiseach and a State guest house on the site of the former Apostolic nunciature in Phoenix Park.

It was January 1991 before Haughey finally moved into new offices in the former College of Science, which are now known as Government Buildings. Haughey was replaced as Taoiseach by Albert Reynolds thirteen months later.

[email protected] NEWS

DPP considered legal action against UCD over condomsQUINTON O’REILLY

A scheme offering students academic credits in recognition of their contribu-tion to the extra-curricular life of the university may be in place as early as this semester.

UCD Students’ Union are hopeful that the scheme might be introduced on a pilot basis later this semester, ahead of a full official introduction in time for September 2010.

Whilst recognising the partici-pation of qualifying students in college life, the system – formally known as ‘service learning’ – is also geared towards encouraging more students to contribute to UCD’s clubs, societies, student media and interest groups. The module will take the place of one elective module, with five academic credits awarded to suc-cessful students.

Students’ Union Education Officer, Donnacha Ó Suil-leabháin, told The University Observer that the introduction of a full service learning option was a “hugely complicated” issue, and explained that each individual student enrolling in the option would be assessed on an case-by-case basis, depending on the nature of their involvement in student life.

“Each of the students has to be taken on and given a tailored programme which maintains academic standards and gives specific assessments to each role they take on within university life – whether it’s volunteering, working with the paper, or so on,” Ó Suilleabháin ex-plained, adding that this workload would require the appointment of a full-time academic staff member.

“There needs to be a full-time person employed by the university to look after this one programme, which might only have an intake of 30 to 40 students in the first year – but with the current recruit-ment position in the university we’re not

in a position to take anyone on.”This appointment cannot currently

proceed because of the nationwide recruitment embargo within the public service, which extends to UCD under its status as a national university. However, The University Observer understands that this embargo may be relaxed in the after-math of the national Budget in Decem-ber, allowing UCD to designate a staff member with exclusive responsibility for

overseeing the rollout of the scheme.It is also understood that students

would have to apply for extra-curricular accreditation in advance of the semester, and that participating students would be required to undertake a role they have not previously been involved in during their time in UCD. Where appropriate, a record or portfolio of work completed over the year would have to be submitted in order to be successfully awarded the credits.

It is further believed that a team from Queen’s University Belfast, where a parallel scheme is already in place, are due to arrive in UCD in the coming weeks to assist with the rollout of the pilot scheme. Ó Suilleabháin said he was “very, very confident” that a staff member could be appointed to the administrative role in the coming weeks, enabling a pilot scheme to be offered later in the semester.

GAVAN REILLY

Extra-curricular credits piloted this semester

UCD’s Arts Society (ArtsSoc) and the Business and Legal Society (B&L) have submitted an appeal to the Recognition Committee of Societies Council in rela-tion to the €5,000 fine imposed on them for the posters used to promote The Vir-gin Ball. The societies were reprimanded in September after including the phrase “Lose your V-Plates” on the poster, which was visible around campus for two hours.

B&L auditor Aoife McGuinness confirmed that she and ArtsSoc auditor Niamh Kiely had submitted an appeal before the given deadline, which was Friday 15th January. McGuinness stated that an appeal had been sent directly to the new Head of Recognition Committee, Feargal Murphy, as well as the Commit-

tee’s Secretary and UCD Student Societies Officer, Richard Butler.

The committees of the two societies erected the offending posters around campus on the morning of Thursday 3rd September. Kiely and McGuinness maintain that they were able to remove all of the posters within two hours of their being put up, after receiving a phone call from Butler demanding that the posters be removed.

A case was later brought before the Recognition Committee of Societies Council, which ruled that the posters were “in breach of the basic standards of propriety and consideration.” Kiely felt that the ruling had been harsh, saying that “they said that we maliciously set out to try and harm the wellbeing of the student body, which isn’t the case at all. We’ve

given our time to the Welfare Crew to help out with various student campaigns.”

Neither Kiely nor McGuinness were permitted to attend the meeting at which the fine was delivered. The auditors claimed that the extent of the fine would jeopardise their societies’ abilities to run the Arts and B&L Balls respectively.

In a statement sent to The Univer-sity Observer after the meeting, Butler explained that the Committee “considered that the message conveyed by the poster was insidious and dangerous, and that it constituted a deliberate act of emotional manipulation designed to prey on the fears and worries of students.”

It is not yet known when the appeal will be heard by the Recognition Committee. Any fine imposed is to be donated to the Student Welfare Fund.

ArtsSoc and B&L to appeal postering fineBRIDGET FITZSIMONS

BRIDGET FITZSIMONS

Former UCD employee jailed for child abuse

CONTINUED FROM P1

stated that after joining the Chris-tian Brothers at the age of fourteen, Drummond had been introduced to self-flagellation aged 16. Rooney also said he felt that Drummond was at a low risk of reoffending, after having carried out a psycho-logical assessment upon him. Judge Morgan also acknowledged that, at 19 and being a member of a strict Catholic religious order, Drummond would have been immature and badly taught about sexual matters.

Drummond took early retirement from UCD after the allegations came to light. Some of his victims present at the sentencing applauded as he was led from the court after his sentence had been delivered.

SU Education Officer Donnacha Ó Suilleabháin

Redmond calls for student grant reform


UCD services were forced to close tem-porarily aft er a fault with the university’s generator left several campus buildings with no electricity.

Th e fault, which occurred on 4th Janu-ary, was caused by rewiring of electrical cables for the Rosemount estate outside UCD. A number of greenhouses from Th ornfi eld were being relocated to the Rosemount estate, and were being con-nected up to the mains.

While power was restored to the campus, some of the buildings and facilities – including the O’Kane Centre for Film Studies, the Oakmount crèche and the fl oodlights for the GAA and rugby pitches – were still left with no power to operate.

A replacement generator was ac-quired later that day to power the crèche and the surrounding facilities but it malfunctioned later that evening.

As Services did not discover the fault in the replacement generator until the next morning, the aff ected facilities were unable to open the following day. Another generator was brought into the university to replace it until the fault was rectifi ed.

Student Centre Manager, Dominic O’Keeff e, told Th e University Observer

that the power outage had caused signifi cant disruption to services in the crèche. While the disruption took place outside term time, he explained that the crèche is busy throughout the year, since it is mainly university staff that avail of the service. Th e problems experienced by the generator meant that the crèche could not open the same day staff returned to work from the Christmas break.

O’Keeff e commended the university for the speed in which they dealt with the problem and believed that “in fair-ness to the university, they restored the power by Monday aft ernoon. Unfortu-nately, the generator decided to blow and then we had to get a replacement generator.”

Th e fault was originally discovered by the university a few hours aft er the power outage occurred but it was not rectifi ed until 6th January.

Th e disruption led to the closure of the university’s libraries with the excep-tion of the Veterinary and Blackrock libraries. Both the James Joyce and Richview libraries reopened later that day with a limited service but normal services were resumed throughout the next day.

A spokesperson for UCD dismissed clams that the fault occurred due to interference with the crèche’s generator.

Power outage causes campus buildings to close

UCD Medical Society (MedSoc) has confi rmed that it raised €43,814 over the course of Med Day 2009, which took place

on 8th October. Th e University Observer understands that MedSoc

is due to present the proceeds to select causes in the Health Sciences Building in early February. Th e ma-jority of the proceeds are to be shared between the Irish Cancer Society, Cystic Fibrosis Ireland and Th e Children’s Medical Research Foundation in Crum-lin. Each charity is expected to receive €10,000.

In addition to this, the Mater Foundation, St Vin-cent’s Foundation and the Student Welfare Fund are to receive €3,000 each, while €500 is to be given to research for Sudden Adult Death Syndrome (SADS) and the remainder to Care for the Elderly.

MedSoc Auditor, Alex Richardson, stated that the students were “extremely happy with the day. Th e fi rst time we collected [in 2006] it was about €28,000 and now it’s increased more every year, get-ting bigger and bigger, so that’s great.”

As part of the event, MedSoc volunteers tradi-tionally carry out street collections across the city from early morning until late at night; collections

from previous years have yielded a cumulative total of over €200,000.

Events held throughout the collection day in-cluded the time-honoured ‘pom-pom parade’ which began at midday. Male MedSoc members dressed in drag and performed Beyoncé’s ‘Single Ladies’ on the streets of Dublin while fellow society members collected donations from the public.

For the fi rst time since Med Day’s inception, students from biomedicinal courses, as well as other graduate faculties, took part during the event. Th is is in contrast to previous years, where it has been confi ned to students from the Medical faculty. Cur-rent committee members hope that this will be a growing trend for the society.

Th e delay in the formal donations, to be held in February, is due to the number of committee members currently on work placements in hospitals throughout the city. Richardson stated that he hopes to formally register a presentation date as soon as key organizers are available to do so in the second term of university.

Med Day 2009 was the third occasion that the event was based in the Belfi eld campus. Previous Med Days took place in Earlsfort Terrace, where Medicine was based before it moved to the Belfi eld campus in 2007.

Also, we’re running the

Quit Smoking Campaign! If your

interested in kicking the habit on

a 6-week challenge email welfare@

ucdsu.ie for more information.

NEWS [email protected]

1.)Welfare FundIf you’re feeling the January blues or having fi nancial diffi cul-ty, make an appointment with Scott your Welfare Offi cer for a chat or to apply to the Welfare Fund for fi nancial assistance.

2) Fresh Start CampaignUCDSU are running the fresh start campaign from the 25th to the 29th of January. If you’re interested in attending fi rst aid classes, they will be taking place on the 26th and 28th from 9 - 5pm. Email [email protected] to book your place. You will receive a certifi cate and its free too!Spaces are limited so it’s fi rst come, fi rst serve.

COLIN SWEETMAN

SU WELFARE Update

Med Day raises over €43,000

Dublin Bus have discontinued services af-ter 11pm on the number 10 bus route aft er further anti-social behaviour earlier this month. Th e decision has been described as being “not up for discussion”. From the beginning of 2010 and until further notice, the last three route 10 departures will op-erate from the stop before Nutley Lane.

Th e service was withdrawn due to intol-erable levels of drinking, violent and anti-social behaviour on board some buses. In recent months, the Students’ Union, Dublin Bus and their trade unions SIPTU and the National Bus and Rail Union (NRBU), the Gardaí and UCD Buildings and Services were in talks to agree security for buses entering and leaving campus late at night.

Despite the eff orts in curbing the anti-social behaviour on northbound buses departing from UCD, Dublin Bus felt that withdrawal was the best option available to them.

Dublin Bus’s West Area Manager, Gareth Quinn, stated that despite there being an agreed action plan to address this problem, there were still “numerous incidents of anti-social behaviour both on and off campus. Th e forum at its year-end meeting discussed the above and Dublin Bus decided that the real problem time was the last three departures.”

Anti-social behaviour has been com-monplace on late night UCD bus routes,

and this is not the fi rst time a service has been curtailed. However, despite sig-nifi cant eff ort and money being spent on trying to solve this problem, continued misbehaviour on the UCD campus and on the number 10 service has forced Dublin Bus to reduce the route’s service.

Aft er persistent behavioural problems in

the fi rst semester, post-8pm services on the route were reinstated and monitored by Dublin Bus representa-tives. On a number of occasions the behav-iour of a minority of students led to the Gardaí being called.

Students’ Union President, Gary Red-mond stated that the Students’ Union were “extremely disappoint-ed with the withdrawal of their service. We feel that we’ve been work-ing with Dublin Bus, and certainly anytime I’ve been at the bus stop things have been markedly better than previously.

“Th is now causes an issue with students in the library because they won’t be able to get a bus to town at half past eleven when

they leave the library.”Th e University Observer understands

that Dublin Bus may be willing to return to a full service in the future, but that such a return would be dependent on students’ behaviour.

Dublin Bus pulls late services on 10 routeCOLIN SWEETMAN

QUINTON O’REILLY


[email protected]

Though it was no surprise when it was finally launched in the first week of January, the arrival of Google’s first

phone – the geekily titled Nexus One – sent enormous ripples throughout both the telecoms and internet industries.

While the search company were flatly denying the existence of the handset in advance of its understated press launch, the existence of the phone had become Silicon Valley’s worst kept secret since photographs of the device – which had been given to some Google employees – were posted on Twitter in the weeks before Christmas.

From a features point of view, there is actually quite little of significance about the Nexus One; it is certainly not much more advanced than the iPhone in terms of ability (though the use of Google’s own open-source Android operating system means that there are more sources of applications than just the iTunes Store). Sure, the Nexus One has a much-trumpet-ed Snapdragon chipset – a new technol-ogy meaning that the phone can work at speed without using much battery power – but its default applications, weight and touchscreen are not particularly unique or game-changing.

There are two game-changing things about the Nexus One, however. Firstly, in a major break from the traditional sales

model in most developed countries, the Nexus One is being sold directly by the manufacturer (in this case Google, though the phone is actually being manufactured in Taiwan by HTC) through its own store, and without a SIM lock – thus allowing the owner to use any SIM card they wish in the device, without needing to get the phone unlocked for a tenner in a dodgy electrical shop on Camden Street. People who want to use the phone with, say, their

existing pay-as-you-go SIM card will be free to do so, regardless of their phone network.

This is a significant shift from the traditional sales system. As most people will be aware, ordinarily when users buy a mobile phone it is heavily subsidised by the phone network selling it – thus barring the owner from using the phone, their own property, on another mobile network.

This has always been an ethically dubi-ous practice and has been legally chal-lenged in many countries, most notably in Singapore where SIM locking as a practice has been totally outlawed. While the Nexus One carries a hefty price tag for the SIM-free model - $529, or about €370 – it still compares more than favourably to buying, say, a 16GB iPhone 3Gs from o2 in Ireland, where the pay-as-you-go op-tion will set you back €519 and still leave you with a phone that cannot be used on

any other network.If this direct sales model catches on –

and early indications from the US and UK where the phone is currently available would suggest that it will – then more established manufacturers like Nokia and Motorola may have to dramatically re-think their sales models, and abandoned the dependable practice of allowing networks to resell the phones.

The second epoch-defining aspect of the Nexus One is that Google, in being the first major web services company to launch their own hardware, allows users to flawlessly synchronise data from their

Google accounts (including the ever-green Gmail service as well as the Cal-endar and Docs applications) to their phones. Previously, companies like Google or Facebook would have had to custom-write their own software for use on other phones in order to allow users access these services. Now, users’ phones will do all this work for them – cutting finally the umbilical cord of privacy and keeping the owner within reach of the web at all times.

It’s through this practice that the Nexus One is likely to become a cash cow. Google’s money is made by its advanced techniques of targeted advertising, which appear everywhere from a Google search result to a page on Google Maps. By essentially allow-ing Google full and unrestricted access

to their personal data, users will be giving Google an unparalleled representation of their lifestyles (the nature of their mes-sages, the demographics of their friends, and so on), allowing Google to further hone its advertising techniques and muscle its competitors even further out of the market.

Time will tell if the world’s first ‘super-phone’ (‘smartphone’ doesn’t cut it any-more, evidently) will redefine how mobile users try online services, but it will leave an enormous impact on the traditional method of selling mobile phones.

Take it to the Nexus levelThe launch of Google’s own brand phone isn’t huge in itself, writes Gavan Reilly, but its implications for the business of mobile phones could be significant

“People who want to use

the phone with, say,

their existing pay-as-you-go

SIM card will be free to do

so”

We have all encountered them at some point: the older gentleman or lady sat at the front of the room, usually answering every question put to the group, and often (in our eyes, at least) holding up the class by asking meandering questions with no obvious relevance. Mature students are everywhere in UCD, and are often unfairly labelled as a nuisance to the rest of us. But how fair is this perception – and how sensitive is UCD to the needs of this unique student group?

Martin Lawless is the auditor of the UCD Mature Society, as well as being Ma-ture Students Officer for UCD Students’ Union. He explained to me that Mature Soc’s biggest challenge is the inclusion and integration of its members into the wider student community within UCD. Although mature students are undoubt-edly in the minority here in UCD, there are over 7,000 of them enrolled in the university (all students over the age of 23 are considered ‘mature’) – and so their inclusion in UCD student life is of great importance.

Lawless explained that there is a general feeling of uneasiness and exclusion among the mature student population who are in the minority, and who feel this keenly.

Feelings of isolation can be a huge problem for the older student. Lawless accounts for this by explaining the lack of contact that exists between younger and mature students, and also – inter-estingly enough – between the various age groups within the ‘mature student’ category. Breaking down the barriers that exist between these groups is a challeng-ing aim, because the invisible barriers are so definitively ingrained in the student

population. Your average post-Leaving

Cert undergraduate student will often go out in town on an organised class night out, have a few drinks, and get to know his classmates. This scene doesn’t tend to sit easily with mature students, thus prevent-ing them from socialising with younger students – and as a result, mature students can become pigeon-holed into so-cialising exclusively with other mature students.

These stereotypes often pre-vent the mature student from properly integrating into their class, as the younger students often have a preconceived notion of them. Thus, mature students can often seem to exist in a no-man’s land between the general student population and the lecturers and tutors.

Mature Soc try to tackle these issue by reaching out to other societies, and organising inclusive collaborative events such as debates. The society has already hosted events with the Classical Society, the L&H and TradSoc this year, and have arranged a comedy de-bate with the L&H at the end of February, where the two societies will debate the motion that ‘Mature students are a waste of time in UCD’. Not without an ironic sense of humour, the mature students will be debating in favour of the motion.

It is undeniable that mature students face a wildly different set of challenges to your average 19-year-old Arts student.

Many are re-entering full time education after many years of working or homekeep-ing life, and the adjustment can be very challenging.

For the younger student population, the move from secondary school to the world of university education is one that comes hand-in-hand with a newfound freedom. Many students move away from home and into student accommodation or rented flats. College life takes precedence in their lives, often even over family life. This natural and exciting transition that many of us make and even take for granted and

which is considered to constitute such a huge and important part of the typi-cal college experience is not something that the majority of mature students can indulge in. Often a mature student is a mother, father or family breadwinner.

Ultimately, though, what matters most are the support structures offered to mature students, who are generally very positive about the impact the Mature Stu-dent Society has had on their experience of UCD life. This is testified to by Laura Connaughton, a first year studying Geog-raphy, Planning & Environmental Policy,

who is the only mature student in her base class of thirty students. “It’s a really good way to meet other mature students you’d never have got to know from different courses throughout UCD,” Laura says. “I think it’s just a really good idea.”

A vintage educationThey’re not all old, grey and fussy – and UCD has nearly 7,000 of them. Natalie Voorheis investigates the lives of UCD’s mature students and finds out what really makes them tick


FEATURES [email protected]

Dear Doctor McSeamy,

I’m a 22-year-old female in UCD who has been dating this guy for a couple of months, and recently he told me that he wants an open rela-tionship. I didn’t even know what that was, but apparently it means we can score other people but still be boyfriend and girlfriend.

Why does he want this, and what should I do? I don’t really like the idea, but he says we should try new things, so should I go along with it?

Sincerely, Sinead

Dear Sinead,

I’m sorry to hear that your boyfriend wants to bang other girls, but this is really what it really boils down to. An open relationship is basically a free pass to get some ass, and if you don’t succeed, go home with your backup squeeze. It’s not fair to you to be put in this position, un-less you want to do the same thing and go out and score some man meat. If that’s the case, then hell yeah; but as you’ve indi-cated, hell no. If you are willing to change it up, I’ll give you a few simple rules to break your man like a wild mare.

Men are like dogs. If you don’t give them boundaries, they will eat your neighbour’s babies like a wild dingo. So you have to create a reward and punishment system. If they behave well, you give them what they want: food, sex, beer and sports.

If they misbehave, you must withhold said items until they run away to a new master (which means they weren’t that loyal anyway) or you break them, and fi nd them whimpering in a corner. Th is is tough, because it means you might lose your man, but when you act like you don’t give two shits if he stays around, it means he’ll want to stay around.

Th is is kind of hard to understand, but it falls under the rule of ‘hard to get’, and have you ever seen a dog chase birds? ‘Nuff said.

So how does this help you? Let me explain. I would bet that even when he snogs other girls, and does all kinds of stupid shit, you still give it up at the end of the night. I hate to say this, but you gotta have way more self-respect than to let him get away with that shit.

Instead, you gotta lay down the law, and tell him it’s either you, or all the other random hoe-bags out there. We men admire someone with some cahones, and this is the diffi cult decision you have to make: if he doesn’t respect you enough to keep you his main squeeze, is he worth it?

Luckily, the reason why men like women who are hard to get, is because it shows they have a measure of self-respect and self-worth, and we really, really like that. Because we are stupid (like puppies), we think that if you value yourself, you are something to be valued (i.e. we rarely ever think for ourselves). So, you must value yourself, and he will value you far more.

Th e open relationship is the Holy Grail for men everywhere. It means you can go around tapping some strange, and then go home and still have your sweet nurtur-ing girlfriend to apply salve to the friction burn. It ain’t right!

Couples Th erapyOur resident love doctor McSeamy is here to guide you through the fi ner points of surviving in a couple Note: Not actual picture

• Bord na Gaeilge UCD ([email protected]) and • Cumann Gaelach UCD ([email protected]) Bronnfar na gradaim i mí Aibreán 2010

Bord na Gaeilgewww.ucd.ie/bnag

Gradaim Bhord na Gaeilge agus Bonn Óir an Chumainn Ghaelaigh 2009/2010

Details and nomination forms available

Bord na Gaeilge and An Cumann Gaelach in Association with the Office of Vice President for Students wish torecognise the achievements of UCD Students and

alumni in the promotion of the Irish language.

• Gradam Bhord na Gaeilge / Society Award don Chumann is mó a rinne iarracht an Ghaeilge a chur chun cinn i rith na bliana (gan na cumainn ghaelacha féin san iomaíocht)

• Bonn Óir an Chumainn Ghaelaigh / Cumann Gaelach Gold Medal don mhac léinn is mó a rinne iarracht an Ghaeilge a chur chun cinn i rith na bliana

• Gradam Bhord na Gaeilge / Student Award don ambasadóir teanga is fearr ar Scéim Chónaithe Ghaeilge 2009/2010

• Gradam Bhord na Gaeilge / Graduate Award d’Iar-Mhac Léinn de chuid UCD a rinne éacht ar son na Teanga

10168 BNAG ADVERT UNI OB 2:Layout 1 02/10/2009 09:49 Page 1

You may notice a lot of talk about the last decade, but what of the one that gave birth to the new generation of UCDers?

To be specifi c, two representatives of 90s iconography have recently been hitting the headlines for various reasons, namely the band Oasis (and by Oasis, I mean the Gal-laghers – the other members have long been acknowledged as glorifi ed hired hands) and the fi lmmaker Quentin Tarantino.

Any parallels between these two idio-syncratic entities are not as implausible as it would initially appear. Th ey were both subjected to single-parent helmed upbring-ings in which their disparate backgrounds distinguished them from their peers – the Gallaghers being of Irish descent, and Tarantino being required to attend a school which predominantly comprised of black students.

Moreover, the Gallaghers and Tarantino were initially perceived as maverick whizz-kids who unexpectedly rose to prominence from unlikely circumstances. Th e former were impoverished council estate dwell-

ers living on the dole before the release of Defi nitely Maybe, while Tarantino was merely a nerdy video store worker prior to Hollywood’s call.

While their respective wheels have not exactly come full circle since then, the remarkable synchronicity of their career paths has endured of late. Needless to say, the general consensus is that the quality of their output has declined steeply since their 1994 peaks, encompassing Pulp Fiction and Defi nitely Maybe.

Granted, few would argue that these artists’ respective follow-ups – (What’s the Story?) Morning Glory and Jackie Brown – could legitimately be classifi ed as disap-pointments. However, you would be hard-pressed to fi nd one person who regards them as superior to their predecessors. Furthermore, the declining quality of their oeuvres in the aft ermath of these releases has arguably been more dramatic.

Inevitably, their defenders will insist that such claims are exaggerated and that their artistic virtuosity remains intact. Tarantino, aft er all, has still received some fi ve-star reviews since Pulp Fiction, while Oasis was

given the NME award for Best Band as recently as last February.

Nonetheless, such assertions bring to mind the famous scene from Trainspotting – incidentally, another iconic purveyor of mid-90s lad culture. In the scene in ques-tion, the two characters discuss people who, like the Gallaghers and Tarantino, once possessed considerable talent, only to subse-quently lose their irreducible incandescence somehow.

“What about Lou Reed?” asks Renton, the protagonist, as he lays in a park along-side Sick Boy while trying to preoccupy themselves while they kick their heroin habits. “Some of his new stuff ’s alright!” “It’s alright, but it’s not great,” replies Sick Boy, as he points the crosshair of his air rifl e at the butt of an innocent cocker spaniel.

Such sentiments can equally be applied to Oasis and Tarantino. Be Here Now may not have been quite the catastrophe which its staunchest detractors believe it to be, and Kill Bill has its fair share of admirers, but you are never likely to witness these divisive projects regularly lighting up Top 10 lists in the same manner as their precursors invari-

ably do.Th erefore,

it must surely be asked why there is such an apparently sharp discrepancy between these artists’ earlier and later works. Was it due to unrealistic expectations purported by the initial hype? Was it perhaps old age? Or was it possibly an inability to change with the times?

In fact, the precise reason for their sud-den shortcomings is hypothesised by the aforementioned Trainspotting argument: drugs. Th e Gallagher brothers essentially blamed cocaine for Be Here Now’s abomi-nably overwrought and mainly unlistenable predispositions. Similarly, Tarantino is an inveterate substance abuser, and disap-

peared for two weeks with an increasingly out-of-control drug habit during the fi lming of Kill Bill.

Th erefore, with the recent-ish break-up of Oasis, in addition to the recent-ish release of the pretension-riddled Inglourious Basterds, nine years of excessive procrasti-nation have fi nally culminated and we have at last witnessed the fi nal death-knell of the 90s and its cultural antiquities.

The Death of a DecadeTh e zeitgeist has passed and the days when Tarantino and the Gallaghers ruled the Earth are but a vivid memory for most of us, but maybe there’s still life in the old, old decade yet writes Paul Fennessy


ADVERTISEMENT

Limited Early Bird Tickets Go On Sale 12pm Wednesday 3rd Februaryfrom SU library shop and online at www.UCDEnts.com

Tickets

Subject to Licence / ROAR / Over 18s / Gov. ID Essential

TWOSTAGES

OVER

ONEGIANT FEILD

THE UCD BALL // FRIDAY 23RD APRIL

LET'S GET THE BALL ROLLING!!

UCD STUDENTS' UNION PRESENTS


ADVERTISEMENT


“We are definitely on our way to a white Christmas!” stated Michael Galla-

gher, a postal worker who is renowned in Donegal for his ability to accurately predict the weather. It is a shame that at the time of this prediction – the early weeks of December 2009 – no one both-ered to listen. What followed Gallagher’s seemingly harmless prediction was a solid month of freezing temperatures, bliz-zards and extremely hazardous driving conditions. Throughout the country, daily life was badly affected. Ireland itself came to a complete standstill, and more and more the public began to see Ireland’s total inability to cope with such weather conditions.

It is understandable in some respects. Generally, winters in Ireland consist of nothing more than a few weeks of solid rain, and a few evenings of frost. However, in recent years, the threat of snow to Ire-land during the winter and spring months has gotten higher and higher. In February 2009 the country was, yet again, forced to a standstill as snow swept in following a severe snowstorm across Britain – and let’s not forget the snowfall in October 2008, which led to a group of tourists having to be rescued from a bus in county

Wicklow. As global warming continues to play

havoc with our climate, we can begin to see a distinct weather pattern emerging. It seems that while we were previously lucky if we even got a light dusting of snow, it has now become something of a sea-sonal norm. In each the past three years, Ireland has been subjected to some level of snowfall. One must wonder; if snow is now almost expected at some stage every year, then why are we, as a country, still so unprepared to deal with it?

Aside from crippling the country, more serious problems arose from Ireland’s inability to cope with this kind of weather, and this was clearly illustrated in the past few weeks. Countless fatalities occurred on the roads over the Christmas period due to increasingly bad driving condi-tions. Due to a severe lack of grit supplies, many roads in Ireland remained ungritted causing many accidents. In County Wex-ford, tragedy struck when a bus carrying postal workers to Dublin overturned on the N11. Eighteen were injured, with one fatality. An ambulance also overturned on the same stretch of icy road while it was responding to the accident.

‘The Big Freeze’, as the recent bad weather has become affectionately known, is the worst cold spell that Ireland has

seen since the 1960s. It has been esti-mated that over 50,000 tonnes of salt – the average annual salt supply – was used within three weeks over the course of the holidays. But with Ireland’s weather con-siderably getting worse each winter, why haven’t salt supplies been augmented? Why has the government waited until bad weather caused so many accidents and spurred it into action? Surely it would have made more sense to keep on top of monitoring the weather, recognising that our climate is changing, and nipping the problem in the bud before it became such a catastrophe? Perhaps instead of wasting money storing obsolete electronic voting machines, we should be storing extra reserves of salt instead.

When it snows in Ireland, daily life stops. Thousands missed work, businesses suffered, transport links were down, almost every school in Ireland closed, and sadly a number of people lost their lives. Potentially facing the same scenario every year is not acceptable. As the big thaw continues, many people are still preparing for more danger. Cork is anticipating fur-ther bouts of heavy flooding. Many roads are still treacherous due to high winds, heavy rainfall and lingering black ice, while footpaths are lethal due to ice, with a high number of people slipping and

breaking bones. The Road Safety Author-ity reports that many road surfaces have been damaged due to the bad weather, and asked motorists to be vigilant and take even more care whilst driving.

While snow can bring a lot of joy and delight with it, it can also cause many problems – each with their own varying degree of danger attached. It cannot be denied that snow in Ireland is becom-

ing a more frequent occurrence, and it is obvious that some kind of contingency plan is needed. As global warming con-tinues to wreak havoc with our climate, our Government must realise that our weather will become more unstable and unpredictable as the years pass. Simply, our Government must take action, sooner rather than later.

[email protected]

The Iceman ComethAs the last of the seasonal ice and snow finally melts away, Amy Wall questions the government’s commitment to contingency planning as extreme weather becomes commonplace, and asks how Ireland can cope in future crises

Ah, Copenhagen, you were filled with such hope. A time when all the world leaders came together to discuss what to do about this global warming. Things really looked up when our great world leader considered it worthy enough for him to drop in on the last day. And the world sat on the edge of its seat.

They emerged with the Copenhagen Protocol, announced and headed by the U.S. It started by stating proudly that they had agreed that Science was right, and that yes, 'according to science', something should be done about climate change. They mentioned a few semi-desirable tar-gets such as capping the temperature in-crease at two degrees, and that this would be nice to be stabilised by about 2050.

And that was it. That took three days. And thousands of planes and people.

Now after the politicians had finished glancing flirtingly at the handsome American, they managed to release this fantastic work to the public.

The world looked up, then down again, then up again in confusion, before finally coming to the realisation that yes, this self-inflated Post-It note was the agree-ment, then they started to get really angry.

It was three A4 pages long. And most of that was filler.

But there was an agreement. We now all agree that deep cuts are required now. That's nice, isn't it?

One of the most damning aspects of the talks was that the USA went in offering a 1.3 per cent cut from 1990 emissions levels by 2020, and came out promising even less.

Sadly the main conductor of this geno-cide of common sense was our new age Superman, Mr Obama, who has the un-enviable position of now doing as little for the international environment as George W. Bush. Questions must now seriously

be asked about when he will begin to fulfil the hype so carefully crafted fifteen months ago. An international agreement would be perfect, allowing him to go back to his Senate and say, 'We have to do it now'. But no: he bottled it.

Also big in the shame charts with this agreement is our new favourite ris-ing son, China (though in fairness, you must remember that it is now accepted internationally that 'climate justice' has to be given to China. Yes, that's right: since China missed developing its country when we rich folk did, it must be given its turn to burn a trillion tonnes of coal). It's the East's turn to ruin the environment merry go round.

Not all countries entered so limply into the talks. Norway offered a 40 per cent cut. The EU total said up to 30 per cent. Even the developing countries of-fered promise: China had extraordinarily hopeful targets, yet soon backed away from commitment to them. Brazil offered a seemingly meagre zero per cent drop, although its 1990 emissions levels are a lot lower than the West's. In the end, however, there was no commitment. No single binding agreement. It is telling that the only positive comments came from our Obama, and the head of China's delegation.

An even more frustrating situation be-came clear in a reading of the agreement's aftermath. The countries that proposed strong targets still don't push on ahead on their own. This is because cuts in carbon have the unfortunate effect of hitting economies hard.

The international debate on this matter can be seen as a giant 194 man race to the bottom. And if someone does sprint out from the starting blocks early, their economies are going to take a hit while everyone else stands still, wondering if

there was a starting gun at all, because they didn't hear it. Everyone needs to start together, or nobody significant will start at all.

There is a new conference in Mexico city in a few months and hopefully some-thing can happen. (Maybe Obama will manage to make it for the whole thing!) There are signs that this could be the starting gun we need. There are hopeful noises that Obama will be willing to agree to legally binding targets and all EU lead-ers have said that there simply has to be.

Whether our governments will even pay attention to this is another world entirely and if we’ll allow them to ahead of our economy and hospitals is an alternate universe at this stage.

Of course, we could all just start living efficiently right away, without having to be told by our leaders and get some things done ourselves. But that’s too difficult, right?

Climate Change: a clouded futureIn the aftermath of the botched attempts at a global climate deal at the UN’s Copenhagen conference, Conor Murphy criticises the inactions of both developed and developing countries to take meaningful action to save Earth

“But there was an agreement. We now all agree that deep cuts are required now. That's nice, isn't it?”


OPINION

No one can say that the current grants system is successful. When the economic climate was less harsh, students often

had to wait weeks into the semester for their grant cheques. This problem has only gotten worse as the recession has furthered. Some students are still waiting for their first grant installments, even though we are now into semester two. For students struggling to make ends meet, the results of UCD Students’ Union’s survey of county councils’ administration costs for grants were a slap in the face.

The discrepancies were huge. From West-meath’s relatively modest sum of €70.51 per student to North Tipperary’s indulgent €484.25, there really is no concrete amount for how much it should cost to process a grant. Clearly, the costs incurred by North Tipperary are ludicrous. In listen-ing to figures like this, grant recipients will undoubtedly agree with SU President Gary Redmond’s calls for a centralised grants system.

Redmond estimates that a centralised system might save the Irish government €20 million, and that it would eliminate much of the red tape that seems to infest the current grants process. To centralise the process will undoubtedly make it easier and cheaper for the government at a time when every penny matters.

However, there is still the issue of time.

First year students cannot apply for third level grants until they are offered and have accepted their CAO place, which is sometimes as little as a week before they start college. The administration involved means that students will never be able to get grants when they need them. In a centralised system, students would be able to ap-ply for grants earlier, giving governmental bodies far more time to process claims and allow students to be able to have access to money when they need it. The start of the semester is the most costly – registration fees are paid and books and materials are purchased. Why should students wait until December for money they needed in September?

The very fact that those who are worst off are unable to get access to this vital money means that the grants system is in dire need of overhaul. A centralised system would destroy much of the bureaucracy that is preventing students from being able to pay their way through college. Added up, North Tipperary’s administration costs of

€254,716.03 are laughable. If this County Council had properly used their resources, many more students would be able to avail of grants at a time when they need them most.

An economic downturn is a time to save, not a time to be rash and wasteful of money. A centralised system would save the government money, make things easier for students, and allow the college system to run more smoothly. We can only hope that the promised enquiry into the grants system will mean more convenience for students, savings for the government and a destruction of the red tape that is stopping us from being able to properly live while in full-time education.

Ho-ho, comrades! Spring is in the air!

Ah, Spring, the glorious time of year when the darling buds of hackdom spring forth anew, and a new horde of power-hungry hacks get the smell of ballot paper blood in their nostrils. What a glorious time it is to be alive, lurking in the shadows as the same new breed of hacks realise that the smell of power is actually the waft of putrid bullshit billowing from Shithead Central being fanned across campus by the latest fire in Science.

And in these times of hope and renewal there doth some shapers be. As the young and the hopeless scrape their shillings together to pay for a few hundred posters that might just about survive the next biblical snowfall (that’s Thursday, by the way. Buy a hat.), word has it that some old fogeys might be sharpening their knives with intent to put themselves through the grinder one more time.

Talleyrand has decided that they must be (a) idiotic, (b) partial to abuse by hecklers, voters, and Talleyrand alike, (c) chauvinistic prats, (d) unable to iron a shirt, and (e) intellectually subnormal even for hacks.

Aiming for a job in UCDSU is only marginally less stupid than volunteering their bodies for a real-life enactment of a Saw movie or offering to sit in a locked room with Martin Butler until the next Irish heatwave (that’s in 2057, by the way. Buy some shades).

Alas! Some kids just don’t know when to know they’re beaten/so last year, and being gluttons for idiocy as they are, can’t get enough of seeing their weather-beaten faces on the aforementioned posters and reckon it might be worth taking a ride on the SU ‘Waterslide of STFU No One Cares’ just that once more.

Yes children, TR is sad to announce that three of Ireland’s least wanted are throwing their hats back into the ring for another year of not being on the dole. Once Snotty got his talons into that Welfare couch, he was never likely to give it up without a pout. Talleyrand urges you dear readers not to make the same mistake this year as you did last – RON’s a lovely fella if you treat him right, and who better to vanquish the Queen Welfairy.

Elsewhere, word is an old foe is going up against a new one for the ultimate “Srsly get a JOB” showdown. Frankly Talleyrand couldn’t care less who you pick on this one as they’re both as obnoxious as the other, well one might be slightly more useful mind. Not telling you which is which, if you can’t figure that out, drop out.

The other down-and-out that’s been inhabiting these parts on a drop-in, drop-out basis has been throwing his toys out of the pram about some Ball that Gazza has hijacked. Don’t worry “baby”, Johnny will take care of it for you.

Before he departs, Talleyrand has a public service message he’s been asked to read out. A wee lad named Redfund has mislaid his shaggy lapdog: he was last seen in the days around Christmas by an educated colleague who was seen departing the family premises in the early hours of the morning.

The missing creature is about six feet in height, bears a scruffy demeanour, and answers to any name whatsoever, having been starved of human interaction for many months now. If found, please return to the Engineering Building where once belonged.

Talleyho!

Talleyrand

TALLEYRANDRegimes may fall and

fail, but I do not…

Re-examining grants As UCDSU call for a full enquiry into the money spent on the administration of grants, Bridget Fitzsimons looks at the current system and questions its feasibility

[email protected]

President’s Awards for Excellence in

Student ActivitiesYou are invited to make a nomination for the President’s

Awards for Excellence in Student Activities. The award schemeaims to provide recognition for those students who excel inextracurricular activities of a kind which make UCD a moreexciting, interesting and humane place to live and to work.

Nomination Forms: available from Forum Office (Ext. 3100), Students' Union and Services Desks.

Any member of the College - either student or staff - can make a nomination.They should write, giving the nominee’s name and a short explanation of whythey believe the nominee is worthy of an award. It is not necessary that the

person nominated is aware of the nomination.

Nominations, preferably typed, should be sent to:

The DirectorThe Student Consultative Forum

Student Centre

They should be in an envelope marked ‘STUDENTS AWARDS’ and should reach

the Forum office before: Wednesday 17th February, 2010

University College Dublin

News Editor


EditorCatriona Laverty

Deputy EditorGavan Reilly

Art & Design DirectorsKristin McKnightDiarmuid McDermott

otwo EditorColin Sweetman

News EditorBridget Fitzsimons

Comment EditorJames Fagan

Features EditorPeter Molloy

Chief Features WriterMatt Gregg

Science & Health EditorFarouq Manji

Sports EditorKillian Woods

Image EditorColin Scally

Music EditorGrace Duffy

Film & TV EditorConor Barry

Fashion EditorSeán McGovern

ContributorsThe Badger, Fergal Casey, Zoë Coleman, Alex Court, Cormac Duffy, Paul Fennessy, Ciara Fitzpatrick, Liam Fogarty, Sally Hayden, Jon Hozier-Byrne, Rita Jacobs, Alison Lee, Ryan Mackenzie, Jamie Martin, Michelle McCormick, Meghan McSweeney, Mystic Mittens, Conor Murphy, Grace Murphy, Ciarán Ó Braonáin, Jake O’Brien, Quinton O’Reilly, Emer Sugrue, Selva Unal, Amy Wall, Louis Westwater

Special ThanksRichard, Peter, Graham, Malcolm, Ian, Tim, Dave, Jonathan, Ade, Emma, Jed, Bob (and the robots) at Trafford Park Printing; Paul at Higgs; Eilis O’Brien and Dominic Martella; Colm, Claire, Rory and Danielle at MCD Promotions; Dan and Orla at Friction PR; Laura and Darren at Warner; Bernie Divilly at PIAS; Rob Lowney; Giselle Jiang; Dave Carmody; Dominic, Grace, Mark, Sandra, Charlie, Jason, Paul and all the Student Centre staff; Stephen Whelan; Peanut Butter M&Ms, Bistro Bianconi, Four Star Pizza, Bombay Pantry, Tesco crisps, the MUFC toaster, Glee, Hobart’s of Ranelagh, the totally-legally-downloaded copy of Mean Girls.

Tel.: (01) 716 3119/3120Email: [email protected]: www.universityobserver.ieFacebook.com/universityobserverTwitter.com/observer_ucd

EDITORIAL

Photo of the fortnight

Leinster’s Brian O’Driscoll trains in Belfield before the side’s Heineken Cup clash with Brive in the RDS last Saturday. Photo: Colin Scally

In browsing the archives for our review of the decade, the thing that stood out the most was how little changes in UCD. Every year, the same stories make the headlines – staff strikes, mumps outbreaks, Students’ Union elections and society scandals. Time marches on, but life in UCD remains largely unchanged. Aside from the changing face of the campus, our community life in Belfield doesn’t look all that different than it did ten years ago.

But a look at the documents re-leased by the DPP recently under the 30-year rule show that UCD in 1979 was a very different place to study and live. While we as students may find it hard to believe that UCD was ever at the forefront of a major national scan-dal, in the late 70s, it was just that.

It’s even harder to believe that as late as 1979, condoms weren’t widely available as a form of contraception. UCD was – for a brief time – the proud home to Ireland’s very first condom vending machine. The fact that the machine lasted just a week before it was set alight and burned off the wall is a reflection of how radical this move was at the time.

In stark contrast to the religious outrage that caused the machine to be vandalised, the more open-minded students of UCD rushed to use the service – 160 condoms per day were bought by frisky scholars in its short time on campus.

If that’s hard to believe, then it’s downright shocking to read that at the beginning of this new decade of

sexual freedom, a parents’ group was up in arms about making condoms freely available to students. Making the headlines in 2000 was the criticism levied at the SU for including free con-doms in their Freshers’ packs. Accord-ing to the National Parents Council, making sure students high from their first dose of freedom have the tools to make good sexual choices was a “dan-gerous and irresponsible” move.

And it wasn’t just the parents who were horrified. The incumbent L&H auditor said the decision to distribute condoms in this manner was “inap-propriate, insulting, counterproduc-tive and sickeningly commercialised.” Nowadays, condoms are a standard part of any student pack; from Fresh-ers’ Week to SHAG week, and the idea that anyone would think it a bad idea to provide horny and hormonal young people with adequate protection is almost inconceivable.

Thankfully, time and opinions have moved on, and our attitudes to contra-ception have become more permis-sive. Although the morning after pill remains a prescription-only purchase, students in UCD are well catered for when it comes to sexual health. With our own doctors’ clinic, pharmacy, and links to STI testing services; the facilities are in place to help students be responsible about their sexual practices.

Much of this progress has been achieved in the past ten years. Not only are condoms now available for free from the SU Welfare Officer, but deals have been struck with suppli-

Editorial

Amanda Knox TrialMadam,

Do you accept submissions from Americans? You probably think that many of us back U.S. attempts to reverse the trial of Amanda Knox, but it is not so. Hence, my letter.

Recently, 22 year old American Amanda Knox was convicted of the killing of her British roommate in Italy. She stood trial in Italy, and the court heard a voluminous amount of evidence pointing to her guilt. She will be serving 26 years in prison.

The family of Amanda Knox is

insisting that the Italian legal system is flawed.

But is the Italian system flawed,

or does the American justice system still view women as belonging to the “weaker sex”, and in need of special protection?

If the U.S. Government runs to the

aid of Amanda Knox and tries to re-verse the outcome of a perfectly good trial, they are indeed making such a sexist statement.

Therefore, barring grave procedural

error, the U.S. Government needs to stay out of the affair, and let justice be served in memory of the murdered victim, Meredith Kercher.

Yours, etc,

Joe RodrigueSan Dimas, California

Confidentiality of Student Records

Madam, May I thank you for publishing

Gavan Reilly’s front page article, revealing how the University Ob-server practiced a deception upon the UCD Student Desk [Issue 6, November 24th]. I think all UCD ad-ministrative staff should keep a copy of the article to hand, to produce when students (and staff) complain about “bureaucracy”, “red tape”, and “jobsworthiness”.

Of course those details should not

have been revealed, and of course there are valid concerns about confi-dentiality following last year’s posting of personal details on Blackboard, as mentioned in the article. There is also such a thing as gentlemanliness. Never mind. The University Observer is obvi-ously training its reporters for a bright future in the Sunday World or the Daily Mirror, the sterling “I made my excuses and left” school of reportage.

Yours, etc.,

Maolsheachlann Ó CeallaighLibrary Assistant, James Library

Letters to the EditorLetters should be sent by email to

[email protected] or by mail to:

The Editor, The University Observer, Student Centre, Belfield, Dublin 4

All letters are subject to editorial approval. The Editor reserves the right to edit any letters.

[email protected]

19th January 2010

ers to make them cheaper to purchase from the SU shops. The link between UCD and Dr Freedman’s STI clinic in Ranelagh is a real boon to students,

since the availability of free STI testing in Dublin leaves a lot to be desired.

As we proceed into the new decade, let’s hope that the huge strides UCD has

made towards encouraging responsible sexual health practices continue with the same determination that marked the naughty noughties.

Contributors: Volume XVI, Issue 7

It is the policy of The University Observer to rectify any errors as soon as they arise. Queries and clarifications can be addressed to [email protected].

Clarification

“Mary Robinson? …I’d smack that.”


Who knew when Sepp Blatter promised our poor country moral compensation that it would involve an all expenses paid midweek trip to London at the beginning of March? This is the reality – and now to top off the luxurious getaway, the virtu-ous neo-fascist hardcore socialists from Kentaro have agreed to organ-ise the whole event.

The Kentarian leader, Kentara, gave a masterclass in media relations and spoke about her delight of high profile international fixtures taking place under their stewardship: “At the time of going to print, there was no one available to comment.” Normally a cynic about general top-ics such as sunshine, lollipops and hugs, the Badger has no major gripe with this loving family-based company.

Don’t get the Badger wrong; he has tried to find fault with this agency and to date has humiliatingly failed. As the pre-eminent “House of Football”, Kentaro’s quest for absolute control over every aspect of the Beautiful Game and take all of the profits for themselves is quite a heartwarming story and brings a tear to the Badger’s beady little eyes.

Sometimes the Badger questions the morality of people when they

donate their own hard-earned cash towards unnecessary charities such as UNICEF, and seem to neglect these passionate multi-national corporations (MNC). In a final plea to convince the public’s mind on where they donate their excess cash, let the Badger explain the motiva-tions and actions of Kentaro with a simple simile.

Kentaro are like the driver of a car that sees people walking beside a giant puddle near the curb. Their natural reaction to this situation would be not to drive through the

puddle at a high speed, thus splashing the puddle in the direction of the helpless pedes-trians. Kentaro are the kind of comforting MNC that will carefully mount the curb at a high speed and plow down all

of the people without even making a dent in their bumper.

Another issue that was in no way getting the Badger annoyed over the Christmas break was the lack of football at certain times, and the increased coverage of darts on his expensive digital TV channels. There are many people who claim that darts is not a sport; however, the Badger’s politically correct view is that fat people need sport too.

Though admittedly darts is a high-class professional sport that

requires a strenuous diet and excel-lent grooming technique to fashion the most trailer-trashy facial hair possible, it must be differentiated from other pretend sports that are based on crap like athletic ability and relative applicable skill. It may be unrealistic to consider darts as an Olympic-worthy sport, but maybe as apart of a modified three-day tetrathlon event, it may seem that bit more appealing.

The Badger proposes that the bastardised competition begin with the most physically and mentally draining event, as opponents test the strength of their own arms against one another, the aim being to pin the other opponent’s arm onto a horizontal surface, with the winner’s arm over the loser’s arm.

Day two will see a further signifi-cant test of the athletes’ strength, as they are required to show their wife throwing ability in the first outdoor activity of the competition (though if all other options have been exhaust-ed, wife throwing can be a converted indoor sport). Though the two previously mentioned sports would be considered a pivotal part of the event, they would only be preparing the stage for the main event: darts.

Predictably, Phil “The Power” Taylor would be favourite to win the first Olympic Gold in the Badger’s revised tetrathlon; maybe Kentaro could lend a helping hand to get this innovative idea of the ground. “Fast. Creative. Experienced. Efficient. Tet-fat-hlon.”

Screw the World,The Badger

Public urination, murder and genocide: all synonyms for the noun-cum- adjective that is Kentaro, reckons The Badger

BadgerThe

Interesting results from Heineken Cup over the course of the weekend saw Leinster finally gain a firm foothold in pool six, after being forced to play catch up on their London Irish since the surprise 12-9 round one loss. Last year’s champions’ bonus point win over Brive on Saturday evening ensured that topping their pool and claiming a home quarter final is not beyond this team. The current situation that the team find themselves in draws many similarities to the climax of the pool stage in 2009. Entering their round five clash with London Wasps, Leinster knew that leaving with a losing bonus point and preventing their opponents from gaining a four try bonus point victory would suffice to keep them

in pole position to qualify for the knockout rounds of the competition.

Thanks to the efforts of Nigel Davies’ young Llanelli Scarlets side against a lacklustre and uncharacteristi-cally wasteful London Irish team on Sunday, this year’s venture to London sees Leinster with the luxury of a similar fall back. Leinster can go to Twickenham free of bonus point pressure. Irish are in the dangerous position of having to chase the game, as they seek the bonus point needed to end Leinster’s quest for a second successive crown.

Though this is not an ideal manner to be approach-ing a match carrying such significance, London Irish are

hardly being coerced into playing an unfamiliar style of rugby. It is hard to imagine them varying their style in the face of impending exit from any competition. In essence, they have been invoked into playing a brand of rugby that has been the backbone of their success on domestic and European platforms under Toby Booth.

Both sides will have many kinks to iron out ahead of this weekend’s showpiece. Even though Leinster gained a penalty try off a powerful scrum, they were hardly im-pressive in this department and through slack defending, looked like a team that was lacking match practice due to the weather hit fixture lists of previous weeks. These intrinsic problems can be remedied with application

in training and increased concentration. However, the Exiles will have already learnt their lesson from the man-ner of their sudden capitulation in Parc y Scarlets, where the manner of their loss epitomised the inherent attitude in the squad that their five-point win was a foregone conclusion. Irish should consider themselves lucky that this lesson came before their task against Leinster.

A flash of brilliance in the lead up to Leinster’s bonus point try gave us a taster of what potentially could occur this Saturday in Twickenham. The awareness of Horgan to pick out O’Driscoll showed that this Leinster team has the magic, even on their off days. Don’t be surprised if Leinster look to do the bare minimum to qualify.

Similar surroundings for Leinster The scene that has been set typifies what Heineken Cup has come to embody, as Europe’s crème de la crème of rugby go head-to-head, writes Killian Woods

5. Nigel Quashie (Southampton among others)It was no coincidence that practically every club who signed Nigel Quashie was promptly relegated from the Premiership – he has suffered this indig-nity on four separate occasions. Moreover, with an uncanny knack of continually giving the ball away, an incredible lack of pace, and a tendency to pose minimal goal threat, Quashie was the complete incomplete player. He even acquired the derisive nickname ‘Quashie well-wide’ during his time at Nottingham Forest in honour of his spectacu-larly wayward shooting. In a decade in which the Premier League was inundated with awful Scottish

internationals (Christian Dailly, Chris Iwelumo et al) it takes an especially poor player to be branded the worst – but Quashie undoubtedly meets all the requisite criteria for this pitiful title.

4. Winston Bogarde (Chelsea)The starkest example I can think of in relation to the obscene wages footballers are undeservedly paid, Bogarde earned a lucrative contact with Chelsea – reputedly worth £40,000 a week – but only made 12 appearances in four years (all of which came in his first season at the club) before retiring. With the total sum of his alleged wage bill amounting to approximately £8.2m, Bogarde thus earned just under £1m per appear-ance. Chelsea tried to force the defender to relinquish his contract by demoting him to the youth team, but Bogarde’s persistence was unwavering: after having accusations of greed levelled against him from the English press, Bogarde responded by saying, “This world is about money so when you are offered those millions you take them... I may be one of the worst buys in the history of the Premiership, but I don’t care.”

3. Gilberto (Tottenham)If one player epitomised Juande Ramos’ hapless reign as Tottenham manager, it was Gilberto. After committing a horrific error that effectively ensured Tottenham’s exit from the UEFA Cup on his debut, the veteran left back was banished into reserve team obscurity. His fleeting reappearance at White Hart Lane under Harry Redknapp was all the more inglorious. With Tottenham’s squad severely depleted due to injuries, Redknapp told the player to take off his tracksuit and prepare to come on as substitute. News of his imminent arrival on the pitch was greeted with unanimous booing from the White Hart Lane faithful, thus convincing Redknapp to sympathetically tell the player not to bother.

2. Mario Jardel (Bolton)At his peak Jardel scored an incredible 130 goals in 125 games for Porto. Apparently, though, nobody had told Sam Allardyce that his weight had since ballooned to such an extent that he made Andy Reid look like a supermodel. Big Sam had admittedly worked miracles in reviving the careers of players such as El Hadji Diouf and Jay-Jay Okocha, but the bulky Brazilian proved a step too far. After an extended period spent largely in the Bolton reserves (he made just seven Premier League appearances in total), Jardel was swiftly shipped off to Ancona, where he made a total of 3 appearances, and was subsequently never heard of again... or until now!

1. Gary Doherty (Tottenham)Gary Doherty (or ‘The Ginger Pelé’ as he was more affectionately known) fully deserves his title as the worst Premiership footballer of the decade. As a long-suffering Totten-ham supporter, your writer can traumatically recall the days when an injury-ravaged squad forced Spurs to play Doherty as a lone striker. Never has a player made the simple task of running look so comical. However, at least Doherty’s role in attack rendered him unable to perform his defensive duties. I lost count of the number of disastrous last minute penalties he gave away, and skewed clearances he endeavoured to commit, when deployed in his more familiar position at centre-back.

Money for Nothing

Paul Fennessy looks at the 5 worst Premiership foot-ballers of the decade and summarises the careers of these incompetent flops

Leinster were not at their best as they saw off the challenge of Brive

Sport Editor

SPORT [email protected]


[email protected]

Schumacher looking to re-discover winning Formula

It was perhaps inevitable that seven-time Formula One World Champion, Michael Schumacher, would return

to the circuit after only three years of retirement. Schumacher, formerly of Ferrari, will compete as part of Ross Brawn’s Mercedes GP team in 2010.

The German has signed a three-year contract with the newly designated team, which captured both the Driv-er’s and Constructor’s Championships under the Brawn GP name in 2009. The German agreed to reunite with Brawn, who had guided him to each of his seven titles at Benetton and Fer-rari, only after inspecting the team’s production facilities in Brixworth. Schumi found himself won over by the enthusiasm and competence of the staff at Mercedes, remarking that “the people seem to be highly motivated as well, and I find that encouraging as it perfectly fits my personal mood.”

The union of Mercedes’ engineering resources and Schumacher’s technical expertise should make for a formidable combination, while the return of the 41-year-old should also rejuvenate a sport that has suffered many difficulties since his retirement in 2006. The Max Mosley scandal, the controversy surrounding

Flavio Briatore’s involvement in Nelson Piquet Jr’s crash at Singapore in 2008, the demise of several teams, and mandatory budget cuts in the financial crisis have left motorsport in desperate need of revival.

Schumacher’s impending comeback will be welcomed for the most part by observers and participants alike. The likes of Lewis Hamilton, Robert Kubica and compatriot Sebastien Vettel will be eager to race against a figure that provided in-spiration as they competed in the junior categories. Others, however, will be less welcoming.

Critics of Schumacher have pointed to

Michael Schumacher’s return to Formula One will be a welcome breath of fresh air for a sport filled with scandal, writes Richard Chambers

his overt aggression in previous cham-pionships. His triumph in the 1994 championship was overshadowed by his incapacitation of Damon Hill’s Williams in an intentional crash, while a similar feat was attempted against Jacques Villeneuve in 1997. Schumacher’s last season in 2006 was characterised by the heated rivalry with Fernando Alonso, with the German blocking Alonso’s qualification at Monaco.

Alonso now heads the team with which Schumacher captured so many famous victories and one could say that Ferrari’s decision to install the Spaniard may have antagonised Schumi. Ferrari principal Stefano Domenicali stated that Alonso “has everything” to beat

Schumacher, pointing to the 2005 and 2006 seasons in which Alonso emerged as champion.

The rivalry with Alonso and the challenge of Hamilton and Button will provide a tantalising edge to the 2010 World Championship. Schumacher’s competitive spirit and urge to succeed will mean that winning an eighth title is the ultimate goal for his season. At 41, he may not be able to add to his cham-pionship tally, but a prolonged challenge may add to the mystique of a man who has defined his sport like no other.

In his first and possibly last sporting column, Paul Fennessy assesses

the respective credentials of Messrs Ancelotti and O’Driscoll

As I write this column, Chelsea sit one point clear at the summit of the Premiership table with a game in hand. Their comfortable demoli-tion of a toothless, injury-plagued Sunderland side was confirmation of a relatively successful first six months in charge for Carlo Ancelotti.

Premier League history has shown that teams in Chelsea’s position at this stage, more often than not, have subsequently gone on to attain ulti-mate glory. Whether Ancelotti pos-sesses the attributes to ensure his side achieves this coveted feat, though, obviously remains to be seen.

At a glance, the Italian’s managerial record is more than impressive. Hav-ing also achieved success as a player (his list of accomplishments includes two Scudettos, two European Cups and 26 Italian caps), Ancelotti represents an anomaly in the form of having the benefit of a successful playing career to look back upon. The majority of his contemporaries – such as Alex Ferguson and Arsène Wenger – cannot legitimately make such a claim.

Ancelotti undoubtedly deserves a certain amount of praise for the ac-colades he helped AC Milan acquire whilst manager there. His honours encompass a Scudetto in 2004, a Coppa Italia in 2003 and two Cham-pions League wins in 2003 and 2007, making him one of only six people to have won the European Cup as both a player and a manager.

However, for all the praise that is consistently heaped upon Ancelotti, certain questions in relation to his managerial style bear scrutiny. His reputable period in charge of the Serie A side was, upon closer inspec-tion, undermined by a series of inci-dences in which Ancelotti appeared all too willing to be overruled by his colleagues – namely, their chairman Silvio Berlusconi and general man-ager Adriano Galliani.

Perhaps the most pertinent example of Ancelotti’s questionable influence on proceedings during his Milanese tenure was a stark confes-sion he made at a press conference signalling Kaka’s arrival at the club. The Italian made the startling admis-sion that he had barely even heard of

Kaka, and that Galliani was entirely responsible for securing the Brazil-ian’s signature.

Some commentators have argued that this system of management – in which coaches have little control over a club’s transfer dealings – constitutes a feasible, or even an entirely neces-sary practice in modern day football.

Nevertheless, I cannot imagine the truly great managers – the Alex Fergusons, the Jock Steins, the Brian Cloughs – compliantly relinquish-ing partial control of an element of a football club that is so intrinsic to its best interests.

An undue level of player power has undone Chelsea in the past. Avram Grant was, at times, reputedly re-duced to a near inconsequential fig-ure at the behest of some of Chelsea’s more egotistical superstars. Follow-ing his sacking, Luiz Felipe Scolari admitted to finding players similarly indefatigable in their efforts to exert a significant influence in areas such as team selection. This rather demo-cratic approach to running a football club unsurprisingly failed on both occasions.

Therefore, if Ancelotti hopes to deliver Chelsea that elusive Premier League title and ensure his reputa-tion as a manager of renown, he must amplify his dogmatic tendencies and ignore player pressure.

~~A large number of Irish sporting

aficionados consider Padraig Har-rington as the greatest athlete this nation has ever produced. I beg to differ: although the Dubliner has an endless list of admirable successes to his name, I would hesitate to call him a master of his profession. Namely, he could never accurately be labelled as the world’s greatest golfer.

Brian O’Driscoll would get my vote as our greatest sportsperson. His recent acquisition of World Rugby magazine’s player of the decade ac-colade speaks volumes for the scope of his achievements and his emer-gence as the talisman of Irish rugby. Furthermore, his dazzling rescue act during Leinster’s 27-10 win over Brive last Saturday reminded rugby fans that his peerless brilliance has yet to wane.

on Sport‘Fenno’

Schumacher’s and Mercedes’ strengths will compliment each other well and make

them a tough opponent


SPORT

Saturday afternoon’s clash between UCD and Lansdowne was one filled with nailbiting action, but Lansdowne brought something extra to the contest and were deserving victors in the end. The final

score of 33-22 demonstrated the intensity of this high-scoring game.

The opening score of the game came from UCD’s outhalf, Niall Earls, who converted a penalty con-vincingly in the fifth minute, while the restart from Lansdowne led to the referee, Peter Roche, award-ing the visitors one of many penalties. The UCD defence was slow to react to Lansdowne’s quick play from the penalty, as scrumhalf Brian O’Riordan’s run led to the game’s opening try, scored by the Lansdowne winger Mathew Healy. The try was fol-lowed by a conversion making the score 3-7 to the visitors.

The fifteenth minute saw Earls attempt a drop goal, which went slightly left and wide. It was, how-ever, an example of the innovative and clever kick-ing he sought to bring into the game. UCD hooker Conor Geoghegan also began brightly and had an excellent game, regularly finding his men in the lineout. Lansdowne responded to UCD’s invention with a second try, however, coming in the twentieth minute with Kieran Lewis running in under the posts. Lansdowne’s outhalf slotted over conversion to extend Lansdowne’s lead.

The battle of the backlines had taken a severe blow when UCD lost Ian McKinley in the opening minutes of the game, while Lansdowne’s afternoon was typified by full-back David Kearney, who was outstanding in most aspects of play as the Leinster player demonstrated his talent in Lansdowne’s fluid backline play.

UCD’s responded well though, and recorded their first try after twenty-five minutes when scrum half John Cooney gave the Belfield Bowl a welcome

lift. Earls’ resulting kick took UCD within four points, and College breathed a sigh of relief a few minutes later when Doherty saved their blushes in a two-on-one battle with Kearney and Healy. A sec-ond try soon followed, after a well-worked try saw winger Tom Fletcher run over, to leave the halftime score at 15-14.

The second half opened with a flurry of gar-ryowens within minutes of the restart. Kearney continued his effective play into the second half by winning his team a scrum in a potential attacking position. The visitors showed the their clinical play off the scrum and worked another try which was duly converted.

The sixty-third minute added to the crowd’s frustration as UCD’s Calibhe Doherty appeared to score the Students’ third try, but for the referee not being able to view the ball being grounded. The home side’s patience was rewarded three minutes later, though, as innovative play from John Cooney led to a try under the posts for Rhys Ruddock. Earls converted once again to leave the hosts once again in front, 22-21.

The pendulum was to swing in Lansdowne’s favour once again, however, when a lucky fourth converted try was scored. Despite the hit, though, a six point deficit was never beyond the home side – until the UCD hooker, on his own 22, failed to find his man and allowed Lansdowne lock Neilus Keogh to scoop up and crossing the line, leaving UCD a deficit eleven points that they were unable to redress as Lansdowne held firm to record a well-earned victory.

Aside from valuable AIB League points, Lansd-owne also left with some silverware – Peter Suther-land presented the trophy named in his honour to the winning captain, John Lyne, before the sides retired to the refuge and the warmth of the Belfield Bowl dressing rooms.

Clinical Lansdowne too much for CollegeUCD 22 Lansdowne 33

UCD 0 Loreto 1

After the weather delayed the restart of AIB leagues nationwide, UCD played their first fixture of the new decade against league leaders Lansdowne, watched by Meghan McSweeney

Although losers on the day, UCD will take heart from a brave performance. Photo: Colin Scally

An opportunistic Lizzie Colvin goal was enough to separate the sides as cham-pions UCD crashed out of the Senior Cup against a well-organised Loreto team in front of a vocal home crowd.

The home side will be disappointed at their failure to break down Loreto’s stout rearguard. Despite having a decent start and showing occasional glimpses of attacking promise though, UCD lacked ingenuity in the final third of the field and allowed the visitors grow in confidence

throughout proceedings.Perhaps frustrated by their lack of at-

tacking headway, UCD launched bodies forward at will towards the end of the first half, only to be caught on the counter by a swift breakaway by Cathy McKean, whose cross fell kindly to Colvin who slotted comfortably home.

The second half opened with a brief resurgence from UCD, as early pressure saw the hosts score through a well-exe-cuted penalty corner, only to be disal-

lowed as the shot breached the 18-inch height limit. Thereafter, a mixture of poor passing and unimaginative interplay let the home side down. Captain Lisa Jacob, who looked lively throughout and was arguably the home side’s biggest attack-ing threat, will have been frustrated with some uncharacteristic mishaps.

Loreto, to their credit, were adept in de-fence and always assured due to this solid foundation. Although they never really dominated the game, the visitors looked

more likely to add to their lead rather than losing it as the game drew to a close.

UCD, by contrast, showed occasional instances of naivety at the back, slop-pily losing possession in dangerous areas more than once, but Loreto proceeded to squander these opportunities, owing to poor finishing and some courageous last ditch defensive blocks. Yet Loreto’s lack of ruthlessness in attack hardly mattered, such was their proficiency at the end other end of the field.

Loreto goalkeeper Louisa Healy was not a complete spectator, though. On the two or three occasions in which she was forced into action, she illustrated her ample reflexes and laudable concentra-tion, given the infrequency of goalmouth action.

Ultimately, as far as Loreto were concerned, this was a game in which the phrase ‘winning ugly’ sprung to mind – an exhibition of rigorous endeavour as opposed to technical elegance.

Loreto edge out UCD with solitary strikeDespite admirable endeavour, a lack of imagination in attack was the chief reason behind UCD’s cup exit, writes Paul Fennessy

[email protected]

Michael Schumacher returns to the world of Formula 1 under the watchful eye of

Richard ChambersPage 29

sportOBSERVER