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A n d r e w K i r b y
The Sto ic Guide To Stay ing Ca lm,
No Mat ter What .
emotions come from within
steady your nerves
be brutally honest
control your emotions
think logically
be present
swap lenses
silver lining
a state of mind in which one is notdisturbed by emotions
equanimity
"apathe ia "
The obstacles we face in life make us emotional.
The only way we'll overcome these obstacles, is to remain in control of our emotions.
If we can stay calm,
regardless of what's happening around us, we will succeed.
You are about to learn how to do that.
Today I escaped anxiety. Or no, Idiscarded it, because it was withinme, in my own perceptions — not
outside.
Marcus Aurelius
Al l Emot ions Come With in
It is not external eventsthat make us feelsomething. It is what wetell ourselves about theexternal event that createsour feelings. Modern sciencehas proven that.
Two men are waiting for abus. The bus is late. Oneman becomes upset becausehe thinks his time is beingwasted. The other man isdelighted because he hasmore time to relax.
This little analogy provesthat it is not external eventsthat cause your emotions -if it were, both men wouldfeel exactly the same.
An unticked to-do list is notcausing you stress. It's yourperception of the to-do listthat is overwhelming you.
Being a victim of an externalevent is the easiest thing todo. It is nice to place blameon something that it notourselves.
But all conflicts startinternally in our own brains.
The next time that you runinto an obstacle and feel anegative emotion, don't lookat what's around you.
Instead, look within.
It is not externalevents that make
us feel something,it is what we tell
ourselves thatcreate our feelings.
What such a man needs is not courage but nerve control, cool headedness.
This he can only get by practice.
Theodore Roosevelt
Steady Your Nerves
During the Civil war,troops were unloading asteamer when it exploded.
Everyone jumped behindcover except Ulysses S.Grant, who ran towards theexplosion.
That is nerve.
Like Grant, we must braceourselves for the realities ofour situation.
And also, the potentialrealities, before they evenhappen.
A consciousness of wrongdoing is the firststep to salvation.’ This remark of Epicurus’is to me a very good one. For a person who is
not aware that he is doing anything wronghas no desire to be put right. You have to
catch yourself doing it before you canreform. Some people boast about their
failings: can you imagine someone whocounts his faults as merits ever giving
thought to their cure? So—to the best of yourability—demonstrate your own guilt, conduct
inquiries of your own into all the evidenceagainst yourself. Play the first part ofprosecutor, then of judge and finally of
pleader in mitigation. Be harsh withyourself at times.
Seneca
Be Bruta l ly Hones t
It's hard to change habits ifyou aren't aware why youdo things.
You should be aware of thetrigger of your habits.
Me mindful of the urgesthat obstruct you frombeing the man you want tobe.
"Why am I feeling thisway?"
Take the time to answer thisquestion.
Investigate your findings.
The practice of self-awareness is like a muscle.The more you use it, thestronger it becomes.
Think about howyou think.
Would you have a great empire? Rule over yourself.
Publius Syrus
Contro l Your Emot ions
When America first sentastronauts into space, therewas one skill that theytrained more thanthe others:
the skill of not panicking.
If they can handle going tospace, you can stick to yourplan instead of freaking out.
Stoicism, and emotionalstrength, is not aboutpretending your emotionsdo not exist...
it's about controlling them.
Don’t let the force of an impression when it first hit you knock you off your fee; just
say to it: Hold on a moment; let me see who you are and what you represent. Let
me put you to the test
Epictetus
Think Log ica l ly
Many of our problem comefrom our opinions of eventsthat are outside of ourcontrol.
Our instant judgementsoften cloud what isimmediately in front of us.
We must always be mindfulof our instinctual impulse tojudge what happens.
This, like many otherthings, is also like a muscle.
Introduce a meditationpractice into your life topractice bringing yourattention away from yourjudgements and towardshard, cold facts.
Be mindful of yourjudgements.
The power for creating a better future iscontained in the present moment: You create
a good future by creating a good present.
Eckhart Tolle
Be Present
Take a deep breath, setaside all your worries andtake a moment to live in thepresent.
Put aside all your worriesabout the future and allyour thoughts of the past,and simply enjoy themoment you're experiencingright now.
It feels good.
The trouble is, you think you have time.
Man does not simply exist but always decides what his existence will be, what he will become the next moment. By the same token, every human being has the
freedom to change at any instant.
Viktor Frankl
Swap Lenses
We now know that ourthoughts affect our feelings.
We also know that we canchange our thoughts.
Therefore, we can changeour feelings.
There is no such thing asobjective reality - weperceive everything thatgoes on around us.
Therefore, change yourperceptions to orientyourself towards where youwant to be.
You get what you focus on,so focus on what you wantto get.
Change your perceptions bychanging what you focus on.
If you want to believesomething, you must focusyour attention on theevidence that proves theperception right.
Do and believe thatwhich will get you
closer towards yourgoals.
A good person dyes events with his own color…and turns whatever happens to his
own benefit.
Seneca
Look for the s i lver l in ing
I used to be depressed.
But, now I know what toavoid doing.
:)
Thank you for reading this.
If you'd like to watch awhole host of FREEStoicism videos, you canwatch them all here:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MgJD8u969eA&list=PLoxRG0tZiah8N6C-P46-JTNLlE4glriER